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Life Is Full Of Tough Decisions, And Nothing Makes Them Easy. But The Worst Ones Are Really Your Personal Koans, And Tormenting Ambivalence Is Just The Sense Of Satori Rising. Try, Trust, Try, And Trust Again, And Eventually You'll Feel Your Mind Change Its Focus To A New Level Of Understanding.

-Martha Beck

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Life Is Full Of

Martha Beck

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Life Is Full Of Tough Decisions, And Nothing Makes Them Easy. But The Worst Ones Are Really Your Personal Koans, And Tormenting Ambivalence Is Just The Sense Of Satori Rising. Try, Trust, Try, And Trust Again, And Eventually You'll Feel Your Mind Change Its Focus To A New Level Of Understanding.

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We Evolved To Move And To Learn With All Our Five Senses!

Heading Towards That Inner Home Will Take You Places-both Inside Yourself And In The External World-which Your Heart Will Recognize As Its Native Environment, Even Though You Have Never Been There Before.

Where Your Attention Goes, Your Life Goes.

Menders Of All Times And Places Have Taught That Silencing The Thoughts In Our Heads And Opening To The Experience Of The Body And Emotions Is The Basis Of All Healing. It's The Only Means By Which We Can Reclaim Our True Nature Or Feel The Subtle Cues Telling Us How To Find Our Way Through Life.

The Power To Bring Me Out Of Solitude - Or To Push Me Back Into It - Had Never Belonged To Another Person. It Was Mine And Only Mine.

Recurrent Floods Of Sadness And Anger Gradually Wash Away The Rubble Of The Defunct Relationship, Leaving Only The Bits Of Treasure: The Remembered Moments Of Real Communion, A New Understanding Of Your Own Mistakes, A Clear Picture Of The Dysfunctions You Will Never Tolerate Again.

If You're Miserable, Make A Choice. If You're Still Miserable, You Can Choose Again.

The Repercussions Of One Person Living In Stubborn Gladness Are Incalculable.

Everything Always Passes, And Everything Is Already Okay. Stay In The Place Where You Can See That, And Nothing Will Resist You.

The More You Claim Your Own Destiny, The Easier It Will Be To Love Unconditionally .

When You Meet People, Show Real Appreciation, Then Genuine Curiosity.

Humans Only Really Learn From Each Other By Storytelling. We Didn't Evolve To Memorize Things. We Evolved To Hear Each Other's Stories And Feel Them In Our Heart. Your Life Is The Most Powerful Story You Can Tell.

Rest Until You Feel Like Playing, Then Play Until You Feel Like Resting, Period. Never Do Anything Else.

I Fell In Love With Africa And Began Helping People Fix Things There.

Whenever You Go Somewhere That Speaks To Your Soul, You Are Going Home To Yourself.

Imagine What You'd Do If It Absolutely Didn't Matter What People Thought Of You. Got It? Good. Never Go Back.

I Now Believe That Bêtes Noires Usually Attack Because We're Thwarting Our Own Destinies. Calming The Beast Turns Us Toward Our Best Lives.

This Very Moment Of Your Life, If You Experience It Fully, Will Show You Astonishing Wonders And Exquisite Delights.

Forcing Yourself To Think Happy Lies Doesn't Heal Your Dreams. Getting To The Truth Does.

If You Want To End Your Isolation, You Must Be Honest About What You Want At A Core Level And Decide To Go After It.

In Fact, When Care Appears, Unconditional Love Often Vanishes.

Unconditional Love

Remember That It’s Okay To Ask For Help When You’re Stumped, Because Sometimes You Really Can’t Be Expected To Handle Everything Alone.

I Want You To Be Supervised, All Day Every Day, By People Who Forgive Your Errors And Believe In Your Destiny.

No Part Of Your Experience Is Wasted. Everything You've Experienced So Far Is Part Of What You Were Meant To Learn.

What Would You Do If You Knew That Every Good Thing In Your Life Depended On Your Getting Enough Rest? Because It Does.

People Are So Afraid Of Authority Figures And Doctors Are Authority Figures.

Hopeful Thinking Can Get You Out Of Your Fear Zone And Into Your Appreciation Zone.

If Anything Is Worth Doing, It Is Worth Doing It Badly.

Tiny Steps Will Get You To Your Goal Months And Months Sooner. A Little Is Better Than A Lot.

No One Else Can Take Risks For Us, Or Face Our Losses On Our Behalf, Or Give Us Self-esteem. No One Can Spare Us From Life's Slings And Arrows, And When Death Comes, We Meet It Alone.

Criticism Is An Alluring Substitute For Creation, Because Tearing Things Down, Unlike Building Them Up, Really Is As Easy As Falling Off A Stump. It's Blissfully Simple To Strike A Savvy, Sophisticated Pose By Attacking Someone Else's Creations, But The Old Adage Is Right: Any Fool Can Burn Down A Barn. Building One Is Something Else Again.

You're Exactly Where You're Meant To Be, Meandering Along A Crooked Path.

Infinite Possibilities

Almost All My Middle-aged And Elderly Acquaintances, Including Me, Feel About 25, Unless We Haven't Had Our Coffee, In Which Case We Feel 107.

Stop Fixating On Stuff You Can Touch And Start Caring About Stuff That Touches You.

A Confession You Make Merely To Illuminate The Murky Corners Of Your Little Life May End Up Lighting The Path To Freedom For A Thousand Other Hearts.

I Have Discovered That Many Of The Things I Thought Were Priceless Are As Cheap As Costume Jewelry, And Much Of What I Labeled Worthless Was, All The Time, Filled With The Kind Of Beauty That Directly Nourishes My Soul... Now I Think That The Vast Majority Of Us "normal" People Spend Our Lives Trashing Our Treasures And Treasuring Our Trash. We Bustle Around Trying To Create The Impression That We Are Hip, Imperturbable, Omniscient, In Perfect Control, When In Fact We Are Awkward And Scared And Bewildered.

Does This Feel Warmer Or Colder?

When You're Weary, Find Relief. When You're Strong, Find Delight.

When Making A Decision, Focus On What Feels "shackles Off" Versus "shackles On".

Bad Habits Fill Needs, So Find Good Alternatives For Them.

I’ll Tell You What It’s Time To Do Right Now. It’s Time To Set Your Schedule In Order So That You Don’t Look Back On The Day Of Your Death And Wonder Why You Never Really Lived. It’s Time To Ignore The Opinions Of Those Who Think Your Life Should Be All About Their Cause, Their Rules, Their Agenda, And Not Your Soul’s Desire. It’s Time To Stop Flagellating And Start Dancing.

No Matter How Difficult And Painful It May Be, Nothing Sounds As Good To The Soul As The Truth.

I've Developed The Habit Of Mentally Listing Things That Make Me Optimistic About The Future. I Do It Every Day.

I Really Do Think That Any Deep Crisis Is An Opportunity To Make Your Life Extraordinary In Some Way.

It Isn’t Necessary To Know Exactly How Your Ideal Life Will Look; You Only Have To Know What Feels Better And What Feels Worse…begin Making Choices Based On What Makes You Feel Freer And Happier, Rather Than On How You Think An Ideal Life Should Look. It’s The Process Of Feeling Our Way Toward Happiness, Not The Realization Of The Platonic Ideal, That Creates Our Best Lives.

Own Your Failure Openly, Publicly, With Genuine Regret But Absolutely No Shame, And You’ll Reap A Harvest Of Forgiveness, Trust, Respect, And Connection-the Things You Thought You’d Get By Succeeding. Ironic, Isn’t It?

Angels Come In Many Shapes And Sizes, And Most Of Them Are Not Invisible.

Imagination Is The Doorway You Walk Through Into Every Future Moment. Are You Walking Through Doorways To Pain Or To Joy?

Adults Under Threat Feel Like Children.

If You Find Yourself Getting Nervous Stop And Relax For Three Full Breaths. Then Take One Small Step, Then Another. That Is How People Get To The Top Of Everest.

Finding Yourself

It Seems To Me At This Moment That Laughing Is A Serious Thing, That It Connects Us With Truth And Love And God.

You Get Social Pressure From Your Parents, Who Teach You To Pay Attention To Certain Things And Not To Others. You Get It In School.

Social Pressure

Bad Artists Ignore The Darkness Of Human Existence. Good Artists Often Get Stuck There. Great Artists Embrace The Full Catastrophe Of Our Condition And Find Beyond It An Even Deeper Truth Of Peace, Healing, And Redemption.

I'm Not Saying We Have Power Over Everything In Our Lives - If That Were True, My Hair Would Look So, So Different - But I Am Saying That There's No Circumstance In Which We Are Completely Powerless.

The Really Potent Part Of Love Is That It Allows You To Carry Around Beliefs About Yourself That Make You Feel Special, Desirable, Precious, Innately Good. Your Lover Couldn't Have Seen [these Qualities] In You, Even Temporarily, If They Weren't Part Of Your Essential Being.

Here Is The Crux Of The Matter, The Distilled Essence, The Only Thing You Need To Remember: When Considering Whether To Say Yes Or No, You Must Choose The Response That Feels Like Freedom. Period.

A Joyful Life Isn’t About Others; It’s About The Brightness That Is Associated With Being Alive. Your Path To It Is Through Anything That Replaces Thinking With Pure Flight, Pure Joy.

You Shine For Who You Are ... Because No One Can Steal Your Light.

Slow Is Fast, Gentle Is Powerful And Stillness Moves Mountains

Take Off Your Watch: The Divine Is Speaking To You.

The Average Adult Laughs 15 Times A Day; The Average Child, More Than 400 Times.

If You Begin To Face Your Fears, Something Bittersweet Is Going To Happen To You: You'll Grow Up.

Learning To Let Go Of Expectations Is A Ticket To Peace. It Allows Us To Ride Over Every Crisis—small Or Large, Brother-in-law Or End-of-quarter Office Lockdown—like A Beach Ball On Water. The Next Time A Problem Arises In Your Life, Take A Deep Breath, Let Out A Sigh, And Replace The Thought Oh No! With The Thought Okay.

Play Until It's Time To Rest, Then Rest Until It's Time To Play.

When You Are In A Creative Or Appreciative Zone, You Literally Have No Access To Your Inner Lizard, To That Fear-based, Non Creative, Shrieking Little Beasty Who's So Afraid You're Going To Be A Bag Lady.

Seek Art From Every Time And Place, In Any Form, To Connect With Those Who Really Move You.

The Way That Other People Judge Me Is None Of My Business.

What Should You Do Now? Find A New Way. A Better Way. Your Way. The Unknown, Uncharted Path Through This Wild New World That Allows You---yourself, In Your Uniqueness--to Reclaim The Full Measure Of Your True Nature.

My Point Is That Perceptual Bias Can Affect Nut Jobs And Scientists Alike. If We Hold Too Rigidly To What We Think We Know, We Ignore Or Avoid Evidence Of Anything That Might Change Our Mind.

Good-looking Individuals Are Treated Better Than Homely Ones In Virtually Every Social Situation, From Dating To Trial By Jury.

Looking For Love

The Shortness Of Life, Which We All Discuss, But Which Is Very Clear To Me At The Moment, Makes Keeping And Spreading A Joyful Peace More Crucial Than Ever Before. Let Us Keep Our Minds On What Matters, Which Is Our Work, Which Is Astonishment And Gratitude. From This Quiet Magic Comes A Power For All Other New Years Wishes To Come True.

The Position That I Take Partly As A Result Of Living In Asia Is Where You Stop Living According To Your Expectations And You Become Available To Experience Things As They Are.

Many People Think Passion Is A Fuzzy Feeling That Makes Taking Action Effortless. In Fact, It's The Gritty Courage And Tenacity To Forge Onward.

I Once Read That Forgiveness Is Giving Up All Hope Of Having Had A Different Past...but Forgiving Is Not The Same As Obliterating Memory.

If You'd Rather Live Surrounded By Pristine Objects Than By The Traces Of Happy Memories, Stay Focused On Tangible Things. Otherwise, Stop Fixating On Stuff You Can Touch And Start Caring About Stuff That Touches You.

Don’t Hide Love. If You Feel It, Express It-not To Demand That Others Love You Back, But Simply To Live Outwardly The Best Of What You Feel Inwardly. The Worst That Can Happen To Your Heart Is Not Rejection By Another Person But Failure To Act On The Love You Feel.

The Way To Find Your Own North Star Is Not To Think Or Feel Your Way Forward But To Dissolve The Thoughts And Feeling That Make You Miserable. You Don't Have To Learn Your Destiny--you Already Know It; You Just Have To Unlearn The Thoughts That Blind You To What You Know.

Many Of Us Have Spent A Lifetime Trying To Be What We’re Not, Feeling Lousy About Ourselves When We Fail, And Sometimes When We Succeed. We Hide Our Differences When, By Accepting And Celebrating Them, We Could Collaborate To Make Every Effort More Exciting, Productive Enjoyable, And Powerful. Personally, I Think We Should Start Right Now.

Anything You're Trying To Will Is Focused On The Future; It's Always Associated With Some Sort Of Anxiety That Makes The Present Moment Somewhat Uncomfortable.

Bracketing Has Turned All My Experiences, Remembered And Present, Into A Gallery Of Miracles Where I Wander Around Dazzled By The Beauty Of Events I Cannot Explain.

To Care For Someone Can Mean To Adore Them, Feed Them, Tend Their Wounds. But Care Can Also Signify Sorrow, As In "bowed Down By Cares." Or Anxiety, As In "careful!" Or Investment In An Outcome, As In "who Cares?" The Word Love Has No Such Range Of Meaning: It's Pure Acceptance.

Do Whatever Work Feeds Your True Self, Even If It’s Not A Safe Bet, Even If It’s Like A Crazy Risk, Even If Everyone In Your Life Tells You You’re Wrong Or Bad Or Crazy.

Peace Is More Than Just A Feeling. It's The Mental And Physical Frequency Where You'll Find All Your Real Power.

Having Fun Is Not A Diversion From A Successful Life; It Is The Pathway To It.

The Only Way To The Place Beyond Fear Is To Do The Thing You Fear Most. This Is How To Surrender To Your Best Destiny.

As Soon As You Think You Know Someone Else's Truth Better Than They Do, You Are In Deep Water.

Make Stuff Up. Anyone Who Ever Did Something New Or Interesting Was Making It Up As They Went Along.

It's Only By Starting In A Place Of Peace That We Find Our Purpose And Power.

Places Of Peace

If We're Stuck With Having Expectations, There's A Very Good Reason To Embrace Positive Ones: It's That We Often Create What We Anticipate.

From A Place Of Stillness, Openness, Forgiveness And Acceptance You Can Renew Your Commitment To Any Eating Plan You Like.

True Freedom Starts With Absolute Honesty. The Moment You Call A Problem By Its Real Name, You’re Already Learning How To Make It Less Harmful.

The Moment We Begin Tolerating Meanness, In Ourselves And Others, We Are Using Our Authorial Power In The Service Of Wrongdoing. We Have Both The Capacity And The Obligation To Do Better.

To Be Really Productive, It's As Important To Rest When We're Tired As It Is To Work When We're Inspired.

Every Aspect Of Your Life, Whether It's A Task Or Relationship, Personal Or Professional, Will Be Based On Love And Joy. And When You Get Right Down To It, Nothing Else Really Matters.

Welcoming Imperfection Is The Way To Accomplish What Perfectionism Promises But Never Delivers. It Gives Us Our Best Performance And Genuine Acceptance In The Family Of Human -- And By That I Mean Imperfect -- Beings.

Question Every Thought That Causes Suffering And Test It Against Your Own Sense Of Truth.

Caring For Your Inner Child Has A Powerful And Surprisingly Quick Result: Do It And The Child Heals.

You Will Know How To Stop Suffering As Soon As Suffering Ceases To Be Valuable. If You Are In Pain, You Are Being Led.

Your Life Is Not Little, And Your Playing Small Doesn’t Serve The World. Your Living Large, On The Other Hand-your Being Your True Self Despite Fear, Fatigue, Doubt, And Opposition- Will Serve The World More Than You Can Imagine. In Fact, It May Help Save It. And Saving The World, After All, Is What All Heroes (including You) Are Here To Do.

Your Body Is Free But Your Heart Is In Prison. To Release Your Heart, You Simply Reverse The Process Which Locked It Up. First You Begin To Listen For Messages From Your Heart-messages You May Have Been Ignoring Since Childhood. Next You Must Take The Daring, Risky Step Of Expressing Your Heart In The Outside World. . . . As You Learn To Live By Heart, Every Choice You Make Will Become Another Way Of Telling Your Story. . . . It Is The Way You Were Meant To Exist. If You Stop To Listen, You'll Realize That Your Heart Has Been Telling You So All Along.

Your Relationship Is Not Supposed To Be Perfect All The Time, Your Business Is Not Supposed To Do Well All The Time, Your Soufflés Are Not Supposed To Raise Perfectly All The Time. Everything Is Designed To Go Wrong So That You Can Gain The Skills Of Rediscovering Your Tracks, Even In Difficult Or Frightening Circumstances. Especially In Difficult And Frightening Circumstances.

During The Times We Think We’re Being “unproductive,” The Seeds Of New Worlds Are Germinating Within Us, And They Need Peace To Grow.

Though We Often See Life Troughs As The Universe's Conspiracy To Ruin Us, They're Actually Our Own True Nature Inviting Us To Lay Down Our Weary Heads.

I Majored In Chinese. I Was Never Really Good At Chinese But I Really, Really Benefited From Having Been Exposed To Asian Philosophy Early In My Life.

If You’re Doing Something You Love With People You Love In A Place You Love, You Are Going To Create Something Of Value To The World.

The End Goal Of All Of This Striving Is To Live Joyfully, And That There Are Often More Direct Ways Of Achieving This Than Conforming To Rigid Standards Set By Social Custom.

If A Problem Looks Difficult, Relax. If It Looks Impossible, Relax Even More. Then Begin Encouraging Small Changes, Putting Just Enough Pressure On Yourself To Move One Turtle Step Forward. Then Rest, Savor, Celebrate. Then Step Again. You’ll Find That Slow Is Fast, Gentle Is Powerful, And Stillness Moves Mountains.

People Who Get What They Want Tend To Be The Ones Who Make The Effort To Know What They Want.

Many Of Us Assume That We Have To Do Things A Certain Way: Ignore Passion In Favor Of Safer Bets, Act Stoic Amid Inner Turmoil, Run On An Upward Trajectory Of Success And Money Acquisition At Any Emotional Cost. But These Are Not Rules.

Creating Ways To Be Happy Is Your Life's Work, A Challenge That Won't End Until You Die.

Connecting With The People Who Are Meant To Be Part Of Your Own North Star Is Much More Important Than Any Aspect Of Business. It's The Essence Of Happiness, The Full Realization Of Your Potential For Joy.

If You're Religious, It Gives You A Perspective.

The Holy Days Are The Best Times To Focus On Real Enthusiasm, The Inner Source That Lightens And Sanctifies Our Lives All Year.

Imagine The Choices You'd Make If You Had No Fear-of Falling, Of Losing, Of Being Alone, Of Disapproval.

In The Moments I Get It Right, Every Step I Take Seems To Be Matched By A Universal Mystery, Which Obligingly, Incredibly, Creates What I Can't.

Sometimes A Psychic Tells You Something And It Feels Wrong And Others May Be Right On The Money. It's Your Choice About Whom To Trust, And Giving That Trust Is Something We Do Ourselves.

We Virtually Never Feel Our Age, But Thinking That We Should Can Lead To Disaster.

Your Individuality Is The Most Valuable Thing You Have.

Valuable Things

In One Century, We've Added 28 Years To Our Average Life Span - A Change So Rapid That Our Brains Couldn't Possibly Have Evolved To Accommodate It.

Emotional Discomfort, When Accepted, Rises, Crests And Falls In A Series Of Waves. Each Wave Washes A Part Of Us Away And Deposits Treasures We Never Imagined. Out Goes Naivete, In Comes Wisdom; Out Goes Anger, In Comes Discernment; Out Goes Despair, In Comes Kindness. No One Would Call It Easy, But The Rhythm Of Emotional Pain That We Learn To Tolerate Is Natural, Constructive And Expansive... The Pain Leaves You Healthier Than It Found You.

Anger Elicits Anger, Fear Elicits Fear, No Matter How Well Meaning We May Be.

Given The Eclectic And Constantly Shifting Nature Of My Metaphysical Inclinations, I Will Probably Never Feel Certain Exactly What An Angel Is.

Don't Fight Fearful Thoughts. Just Match Each One With An Alternative Thought That Brings You More Peace.

Do Whatever It Takes To Convey Your Essential Self.

Whatever It Takes

Most Unhappy People Need To Learn Just One Lesson: How To See Themselves Through The Lens Of Genuine Compassion, And Treat Themselves Accordingly.

Judgments That Constrain Your Giving Are The Very Demons That Are Keeping You From Receiving.

To Know What That True Self Is Without Social Pressure Is To Know Your True Nature.

Social Pressure

Truth Itself Is Something You Live, Not Something You Think.

The Heart Is A Tender But Hardy Organ. Daring To Have A Wonderful Experience, Even Though You May Get Hurt, Is The Only Way You'll Realize Its Deepest Desires.

Allowing Children To Show Their Guilt, Show Their Grief, Show Their Anger, Takes The Sting Out Of The Situation.

To Make An Activity Joyful, Keep Adding Things Until The Activity As A Whole Becomes More Appealing Than Repulsing.

No One Can Give You Anything-love, Shame, Self-esteem- Until You Give It To Yourself. Today, Give Yourself Good Things.

Pain Is Like A Life Coach In Your Body. It’s What Made Me A Life Coach Because I Started Paying A Lot Of Attention To What Made Me Hurt And What Didn’t. It Turned Out My Body Was Trying To Steer Me Away From A Life That Was Absolutely Wrong For Me And Into A Life That Was Absolutely Wonderful.

You Will Never Realize Your Best Destiny Through The Avoidance Of Fear. Rather, You Will Realize It Through The Exercise Of Courage, Which Means Taking Whatever Action Is Most Liberating To The Soul, Even When You Are Afraid.

Constantly Measuring Ourselves Against Others Sours And Shortens Our Lives, Robbing Us Of The Very Things We Think It Will Bring: Prosperity, Love, Inner Peace, The Knowledge That We’re Good Enough.

To Live A Life That Is Wrong For You Is A Form Of Dying. There Are People Who Have Lives That Look Perfect. They Try To Be Happy, They Believe They Should Be Happy, They Are Trying To Like It, But If It's Off Course From Their North Star, They Aren't Satisfied.

Just One Mental Shift-focusing On The Abundance Of Your Environment-switches Your Psychological Settings So That Your Life Automatically Improves In Many Areas You May Think Are Unrelated. This Is Essentially A Leap From Fear To Faith.

People Don’t Cry When They Lose Their Hope. They Cry When They Get It Back.

Only Since The Industrial Revolution Have Most People Worked In Places Away From Their Homes Or Been Left To Raise Small Children Without The Help Of Multiple Adults, Making For An Unsupported Life.

To Attract Something That You Want, Become As Joyful As You Think That Thing Would Make You.

Don't Expect The Future To Look Like The Past. Clear Away Expectations, And Let Yourself Picture A Wild, Grand New World.

My Deep Belief Is That All Of Us Have The Same Lifelong Work: To Learn Honesty, Courage, And Love. To Learn, In Other Words, How To Be Our Best Selves.

Your First Daily Priority Should Be Stillness, Attention To What You Really Know And What You Really Feel.

Any Moment You Spend Attacking Yourself Is A Moment Away From Your Higher Purpose And Your Power To Love. Don't Go There.

If You Think There Is No Action That You Can Perform In Your Current Circumstances That Will Increase The Supply Of Love In The World, You Are Believing A Lie. At The Very Least, You Always Have The Option To Offer Yourself Kindness And Understanding. That Alone Can Increase The Supply Of Love In The World.

Fear Is The Raw Material From Which Courage Is Manufactured. Without It, We Wouldn't Even Know What It Means To Be Brave.

Somewhere In There, Among The Worries, Questions, Advice And Advertising Jingles, Lives Your Intuition, Your True 'inner Voice.' You Can Hear It To The Extent That You Give It Your Attention.

The Part Of You That Is Unhampered By Illusion-the Illusion Of Time, The Illusion Of Powerlessness, The Illusion Of Impossibility-i S Waiting For You To Slow Down And Open Up So That It Can Speak To Your Consciousness. In Some Unguarded Moment, You Will Hear Its Wildly Improbable Words And Know That They Are Guiding You Home.

Most Of My Clients Don't Realize That The Way They Look And The Way They Think About Their Looks Are Two Separate Issues.

Remember, Intimacy Increases With Honesty. Share Less To Keep People Away And More To Draw Them Closer.

As Any Good Buddhist Will Tell You, The Only Way To Find Permanent Joy Is By Embracing The Fact That Nothing Is Permanent.

If You See Failure As A Monster Stalking You, Or One That Has Already Ruined Your Life, Take Another Look. That Monster Can Become A Benevolent Teacher, Opening Your Mind To Successes You Cannot Now Imagine.

Although Beauty May Be In The Eye Of The Beholder, The Feeling Of Being Beautiful Exists Solely In The Mind Of The Beheld.

If You're Living Completely On Your Own, Break Out Of Solitary Confinement. Seek To Understand Others, And Help Them Understand You

If You're A Bit Spongy, Vulnerable To The Unsettling Energy Of Others, Count Yourself Lucky. You've Been Given An Incentive To Armor Up, To Consciously Screen Out The Ubiquitous Stresses That Afflict Humanity.

Anyone Who Comes Into Your Life, Under Any Circumstances, Has Something To Teach You.

If You Feel Stuck In Your Present Life, If You Feel No Enthusiasm For Anything, If You Think You Have No Purpose Or That You Lost That Purpose Somewhere Along The Way, I Guarantee You Are Living In A Dungeon Made Of Stories. And That None Of Those Limiting Stories Are True.

Try Seeing Your World And Yourself This Way, Eyes Open To Whatever Is Before You, Mind Free Of Dichotomies. Are You Good Or Bad, Fragile Or Tough, Wise Or Foolish? Yes. And So Am I.

You Do Not Owe Anyone Your Time. When You Realize That, Others Will Respect Your Time Much More.

You Have The Freedom To Live And Let Live, To Love And Let Love. Granting Yourself That Freedom Is One Of The Healthiest, Most Constructive Things You Can Do For Yourself And The People Who Matter To You.

Live And Let Live

If You Did Nothing But Pursue The Truth About Yourself For The Rest Of Your Life, You Would Never Run Out Of Fresh Discoveries.

Rest Of Your Life

Polite Strangers Often Tell Soothing Lies About Our Physical Appearance That Prevent Many Of Us From Facing, Discussing And Solving Our Real Problems.

My Anguish Came From My Hypothesis That Other People's Hypothetical Hypotheses About Me Mattered. Ridiculous!

I Want You To Notice Is That-right Here, Right Now-you’re Okay. You May Be In Pain, You May Be In Fear, You May Be In Grief. But You’re Here, You’re Surviving; This Moment Is Okay.

Don't Let Your Life Revolve Around Whatever You're Trying Not To Do Or Feel. Live To Experience, Not To Avoid.

Instead Of Hiding Your Loneliness, Bring It Into The Light. Honor It. Treat It. Heal It. You'll Find That It Returns The Favor.

Basic Human Contact - The Meeting Of Eyes, The Exchanging Of Words - Is To The Psyche What Oxygen Is To The Brain. If You're Feeling Abandoned By The World, Interact With Anyone You Can.

Loneliness Is Proof That Your Innate Search For Connection Is Intact.

Any Transition Serious Enough To Alter Your Definition Of Self Will Require Not Just Small Adjustments In Your Way Of Living And Thinking But A Full-on Metamorphosis.

The Knowledge Of Your Destiny Is Available To You, Well Before It Actually Happens, As A Message Streaming Continuously From Your Heart To Your Brain, Written In The Language Of Longing.

There Has Never Been, And Never Will Be, Anyone Who Sees, Thinks, Or Responds Exactly The Way You Do. Whether You’re Revolutionizing Physics Or Making A Quilt, You Must Display Your Differences To Make A Difference.

Children Who Assume Adult Responsibilities Feel Old When They're Young.

Whether You've Seen Angels Floating Around Your Bedroom Or Just Found A Ray Of Hope At A Lonely Moment, Choosing To Believe That Something Unseen Is Caring For You Can Be A Life-shifting Exercise.

Conflict In Close Relationships Is Not Only Inevitable, It's Essential. Intimacy Connects People Who Are Inevitably Different.

I Am Free, And Always Have Been; Free To Accept My Own Reality, Free To Trust My Perceptions, Free To Believe What Makes Me Feel Sane Even If Others Call Me Crazy, Free To Disagree Even If It Means Great Loss, Free To Seek The Way Home Until I Find It.

Whoever Said That Love Is Blind Was Dead Wrong. Love Is The Only Thing On This Earth That Lets Us See Each Other With The Remotest Accuracy.

Instead Of Fretting About Getting Everything Done, Why Not Simply Accept That Being Alive Means Having Things To Do? Then Drop Into Full Engagement With Whatever You're Doing, And Let The Worry Go.

Explorers Depend On The North Star When There Are No Other Landmarks In Sight. The Same Relationship Exists Between You And Your Right Life, The Ultimate Realization Of Your Potential For Happiness. I Believe That A Knowledge Of That Perfect Life Sits Inside You Just As The North Star Sits In Its Unaltering Spot.

Do Something Today That You Think Is Too Delicious, Too Selfish, Too Wacky To Fit Within The Rules Of Your Life.

You Are Lovable. Can You Show Me Any Baby In Any Nursery Who Isn't Priceless? No. There's No Such Thing As A Worthless Newborn. And The Essential Value That Was Born Into Brand-new-baby You Can Never Be Extinguished. This Means That Even If You Think You're Being Absolutely Honest, Believing Yourself To Be Anything Other Than Astonishing, Incomparable, And Infinitely Precious Makes You A Habitual Liar.

Absolutely Lonely People Have Few Personal Interactions Of Any Kind.

The Way Out Of Fear Isn’t Safety. It’s Freedom.

Friends, There Are Many Areas In Which I Need Encouragement, But Worrying Is Not One Of Them. I Worry The Way Renée Fleming Sings High Cs: Effortlessly. Loudly. At Length.

External Circumstances Do Not Create Feeling States. Feeling States Create External Circumstances.

I Explain To Everyone I Deal With-co-workers, Children, Friends-that I'm Transitionally Challenged And They Should Call Me On My Cell Phone If I'm Even A Few Minutes Late. Such Calls Often Come In When I'm Happily Writing Or Rearranging The Furniture. The Monochrones In My Life Are So Organized, They Have No Trouble Remembering To Remind Me To Show Up.

The Idea Is To Identify A Destructive Thought Pattern, Then Simply Label It And Watch It And Let It Pass By Whenever It Appears In Your Mind.

The Past Doesn’t Exist Except As A Memory, A Mental Story, And Though Past Events Aren’t Changeable, Your Stories About Them Are. You Can Act Now To Transform The Way You Tell The Story Of Your Past, Ultimately Making It A Stalwart Protector Of Your Future.

Perpetually Doing, Without Ever Tuning In To The Center Of Our Being, Is The Equivalent Of Fueling A Mighty Ship By Tossing All Its Navigational Equipment Into The Furnace.

All Religious Leaders And Spiritual Teachers Emphasize Finding A Place Within Us That Is True. People Who Obsessively Follow These Leaders Instead Of Their Own Purpose Attach To The Spiritual Leader And Become Fanatical And Controlling. That's Why Jesus Tried To Tell His Followers Not To Get Attached To Outward Form.

Breathe In, Breathe Out, No Fear, No Doubt.

Learning To Quit While You're Not Ahead, When The Dull Ooze Of Depression Tells You Things Are Not Going To Get Any Better, Is One Of The Best Financial And Life Skills You Can Master.

The Process Of Spotting Fear And Refusing To Obey It Is The Source Of All True Empowerment.

Most Of Our Stress And Suffering Come Not From Events, But From Our Thoughts. Reframe From Negative Thoughts, And Stress Subsides.

To Follow Your Life's Guidance, You May Have To Reassign Some Seemingly Important Things To 'unimportant.' If You Believe That Pleasing Your Horrible Boss Or Having A Spotless House Is A Higher Priority Than Playing With Your Children Or Sleeping Off The Flu, Be Prepared For A Long And Strenuous Battle Against Destiny. Also, Be Prepared To Lose.

A True Leader Is Not Someone Who Feels Fully Informed But Someone Who Continuously Receives Insight And Guidance.

Good Fortune Has Side Effects.

When You Do The Thing You Fear, The Thing Loses Its Power To Scare.

The Effect Of Emotional Venting Is To Sustain An Unsatisfactory Status Quo. Most People Think The Opposite, That Complaining Is Part Of An Effort To Change An Unsatisfying Situation. Nope. Complaining Lets Off Pressure So That We Neither Explode With Frustration Nor Feel Compelled To Take The Often Risky Steps Of Openly Opposing A Difficult Person Or Situation. Keeping Emotional Pressure Tolerably Low Doesn't Change Problematic Circumstances But Rather Perpetuates Them.

Feel About Yourself What You Would Have Others Feel About Themselves.

When Fear Makes Your Choices For You, No Security Measures On Earth Will Keep The Things You Dread From Finding You. But If You Can Avoid Avoidance - If You Can Choose To Embrace Experiences Out Of Passion, Enthusiasm, And A Readiness To Feel Whatever Arises - Then Nothing, Nothing In All This Dangerous World, Can Keep You From Being Safe.

Dangerous World

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Chris Van Hollen

Phyllis Bottome

Carl Clinton Van Doren

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