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You're Either A Rationalist, Or You're Not. And The Good News Is A Recent Poll Found 20% Of Adults Under 30 Say They Are Rationalists, And Have Figured Out That Santa Claus And Jesus Are Really The Same Guy. Now, 20% Is Hardly A Majority. But It's A Bigger Minority Than Blacks, Jews, Homosexuals, Nra Members, Teachers, Or Seniors... And It's Certainly Enough To Stop Being Shy About Expressing The Opinion That We're Not The Crazy Ones!

-Bill Maher

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You're Either A Rationalist,

Bill Maher

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You're Either A Rationalist, Or You're Not. And The Good News Is A Recent Poll Found 20% Of Adults Under 30 Say They Are Rationalists, And Have Figured Out That Santa Claus And Jesus Are Really The Same Guy. Now, 20% Is Hardly A Majority. But It's A Bigger Minority Than Blacks, Jews, Homosexuals, Nra Members, Teachers, Or Seniors... And It's Certainly Enough To Stop Being Shy About Expressing The Opinion That We're Not The Crazy Ones!

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Freedom Of Speech

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People On The Right Say To People Like Me, Oh, You Hate America. And I Always Say, No, I Love America. I Want It Back. I Don't Want You Representing It. I Don't Want Torture Representing It. If I Hated It, I'd Be Okay With Being Represented By The Torturers.

They Told Us To Buy Duct Tape And Portable Radios So That If The World Does End, We Can All Listen To Rush Limbaugh Blame It On Clinton.

Things Aren't Right. If A Burglar Breaks Into Your Home And You Shoot Him, He Can Sue You. For What, Restraint Of Trade?

Rick Santorum Has Come Out Against Contraception And Against College. He Wants Us Literally To Be F**king Stupid.

New Rule: If You Still Think Obama Is A Muslim, You Just Might Be A Redneck. A Christian Church In South Carolina Has A Sign Out Front That Says 'obama... Osama... Hmmm... Are They Brothers?' No, They're Not Brothers. In Fact, They're Not Even Related, Which Is More Than I Can Say For The Married Couples In Your Church.

There Is A Big Difference Between A Disappointing Friend And A Deadly Enemy. Of Course The Democrats Are Disappointing. That's What Makes Them Democrats. If They Were Any More Frustrating They'd Be Your Relatives. But In This Country They Are All That Stands Between You And Darkest Night. You Know Why Their Symbol Is The Letter 'd'? Because It's A Grade That Means Good Enough, But Just Barely. You Know Why The Republican Symbol Is 'r'? Because It's The Noise A Pirate Makes When He Robs You And Feeds You To A Shark.

Republicans Say That Sex Is Bad, Because With Them It Always Is. It Is!...i'm Sorry, But They're Just Doughy, Asexual, Wonky, White People, And If You Had To Have Sex With Them It Would Be Over In An Excruciating Three Minutes. It's Just, - And From The Headlines Of The Past Year I Gather The Only Sex They're Really Good At, Is Gay Sex. Really.

Well, The American Public Always Wanted To Vote For A Guy And Bush Was The Perfect Guy Who They'd Want To Have Over For Pot-roast. And George Bush Is That Guy. He Does That Well. You'd Like To Have Him Over For Pot-roast. He Reminds You Of Yourself. Okay. Well, Now He's Been Over, He's Had The Pot-roast. But He's Getting Drunk And Now He's Talking About Stem Cells And Terri Schiavo And Gay Marriage. And Now He's The Guest That Won't Leave.

There's A New Ipad Out...people Are Going Nuts For This Thing...and, Today, Mitt Romney Said, 'it's A Flat Piece Of White Plastic. If You Can Love It, Why Not Me?'

They Say That Japan's Rigorous Building Codes And Regulations Saved Thousands Of Lives Over There. Or, As Republicans Here Saw It, It 'fostered A Socialist, Anti-business Environment That's Worse Than Being Dead.'

I Want To See Riots! I Want To See The Kind Of Riots Where Cab Drivers Are Afraid To Pick Up White People! I Want To See This Guy!

To Even Win A Nomination In This Country, You Have To Say You're A Person Of Great Faith. You Have To Pledge To The People Out There That You Put Your Faith In Things That Are Unable To Be Proven - That You Suspend Critical Thinking As The Way To Go.

When I Was In High School The Worst Thing You Could Ever Get Was Vd. Talk About The Sniffles! I Just Want To Meet An Old-fashioned Girl With Gonorrhea.

Like It Or Not, We're Still A Primitive Tribe Ruled By Fears, Superstition And Misinformation.

You Know What Happens When Windmills Collapse Into The Sea? A Splash.

Thanks [donald] Trump For Exposing Evangelicals As 'shameless Hypocrites'.

I Hear This All The Time: 'obama's Policies Aren't Working.' He Hasn't Been Allowed To Put His Policies Into Place.

The Great Thing About Having Been Poor Is How Liberated It Makes You If You Eventually Become Rich. There's Nothing Like The Knowledge That You Don't Need Money To Survive. That The Money Cushion You Lie On Every Night Doesn't Have To Be Three Feet Thick, And You Can Still Get To Sleep.

New Jersey Mayor Corey Booker Last Night Personally Rescued A Woman From A Burning Building. Or As Fox News Reported It, 'black Man Loots House, Steals White Woman.'

Wichita Falls, Texas Is Considering Using Toilet Water For Drinking. And A Dog There Today Said, 'white People's Problems.'

My Generation Didn`t Face The Kind Of Urgent, Pressing Issues That My Parents Did, Who Fought Through A War And A Depression And Know What Suffering Is. That`s Why Bob Dole Had A Tough Time With This Electorate. He Was An Old-fashioned Curmudgeon Who Knew About Sacrifice, And We Didn`t Know If We Could Live Up To His Standards. But We Knew We Could Live Up To Bill Clinton`s. He`s More Like One Of Us.

Oh, America! I Could Never Leave You! You're Like My Dog, Dumb As A Post But You Make Me Laugh!

[obamacare] Was Going To Be The Republicans' Big Issue, And They're Not Talking About It Because It's Working.

Halloween Is A Day When We All Get To Fool People Into Thinking We're Someone Else. Or As Mitt Romney Calls It, Campaigning.

You Can Behead People, You Can Crucify Them, You Can Cut Their Hearts Out And Eat Them On Youtube...but, Don't Screw With The Place Where God Hid America's Oil.

New Rule: News Organizations Have To Stop Using The Phrase: "we Go Beyond The Headlines." That's Your Job, Dummy. You Don't See American Airlines Saying, "we Land Our Jets On The Runway"!

Arnold Was On The 'today' Show Today, He Was A Little Light On Specifics. He Said He Could Solve California's $38 Billion Budget Deficit, Without Cutting Spending Or Raising Taxes Because There Was A Third Way. What Is It? Let's Just Say It Involves A Robot Going Back In Time To Convince Gray Davis To Go Into Dentistry.

How Can The Republicans Get Away With Picking Their Dennis Kucinich, But When - If The Democrats Tried It, All Hell Would Break Lose?

When Opportunity Knocks All Some People Can Do Is Complain About The Noise.

Americans Are Gluttons. We Shop With Forklifts. We Have A Holiday Where We Stuff Food Into Other Food. Our Strippers Wrestle In Jell-o, Where Other Countries Have To Use Mud.

I Don't Understand How The Republican Party Is The Party With The Reputation For Fiscal Conservatism And Fiscal Sanity, When They're The Ones Who Run Up The Debt. It Was Reagan Who Ran Up The Debt And Now Bush Is Doing It Again, And In Between, Clinton And Bush's Father, I Must Say, Worked So Hard To Get That Deficit And That Debt Down.

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