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With Albright At The Helm Of The State Department, Osama Bin Laden Ran Wild Throughout The Middle East, The North Koreans Began Feverishly Building Nukes Under Her Nose, And We Staged A Pre-emptive Attack Solely For Purposes Of Regime Change Based On False Information Presented To The American People By Albright About A World Leader Who Was Not An Imminent Threat To The United States. Slobodan Milosevic Wasn't Even A Latent, Long-term, Hypothetical Threat.

-Ann Coulter

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With Albright At The

Ann Coulter

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With Albright At The Helm Of The State Department, Osama Bin Laden Ran Wild Throughout The Middle East, The North Koreans Began Feverishly Building Nukes Under Her Nose, And We Staged A Pre-emptive Attack Solely For Purposes Of Regime Change Based On False Information Presented To The American People By Albright About A World Leader Who Was Not An Imminent Threat To The United States. Slobodan Milosevic Wasn't Even A Latent, Long-term, Hypothetical Threat.

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The Only Place Al Gore Conserves Energy These Days Is On The Treadmill. I Don't Want To Suggest That Al's Getting Big, But The Last Time I Saw Him On Tv I Thought, "that Reminds Me - We Have To Do Something About Saving The Polar Bears." Never Mind His Carbon Footprint - Have You Seen The Size Of Al Gore's Regular Footprint Lately? It's Almost As Deep As Janet Reno's.

Carbon Footprint

Anorexics Never Have Boyfriends. ... That's One Way To Know You Don't Have Anorexia, If You Have A Boyfriend.

If Hitler Hadn't Turned Against Their Beloved Stalin, Liberals Would Have Stuck By Him, Too.

Most People In The Tea Party Are Nice, But That Hasn't Stopped Liberals From Hating Them.

I Don't Think We [the Usa] Need More Troops. I Think We Need To Be Less Worried About Civilian Casualties.

Almost Everything Wrong With Our Health Care System Comes From Government Interference With The Free Market. If The Health Care System Is Broken, Then Fix It. Don't Try To Invent A New One Premised On All The Bad Ideas That Are Causing Problems In The First Place.

Canada Used To Be...one Of Our Most...most Loyal Friends, And Vice Versa. I Mean, Canada Sent Troops To Vietnam. Was Vietnam Less Containable And More Of A Threat Than Saddam Hussein?

Much Of The Left's Hate Speech Bears Greater Similarity To A Psychological Disorder Than To Standard Political Discourse. The Hatred Is Blinding, Producing Logical Contradictions That Would Be Impossible To Sustain Were It Not For The Central Element Faith Plays In The Left's New Religion. The Basic Tenet Of Their Faith Is This: Maybe They Were Wrong About Their Facts And Policies, But They Are Good And Conservatives Are Evil. You Almost Want To Give It To Them. It's All They Have Left.

Psychological Disorders

Here's A Foolproof Method For Keeping America Safe. Always Do The Exact 180-degree Opposite Of Whatever [jimmy] Carter Says, As Quickly As Possible.

Liberals Have Managed To Eliminate The Idea Of Manly Honor. Instead, All They Have Is Womanly Indignation.

If You Attack The Clintons Publicly, Make Sure All Your Friends Know That You Are Not Planning Suicide, That You're Not Careless When You Drive A Car.

Hillary Has Already Gotten A Record $8 Million Advance From Simon & Schuster For The Book -- Reportedly The Most Anyone Has Ever Received For Rewriting History.

As Far As I'm Concerned, I'm A Middle-of-the-road Moderate And The Rest Of You Are Crazy.

Yet, When Republicans Were Finally Able To Push Through Tough Policies On Crime And Welfare Which They'd Supported For Decades, They Were Magnificent Successes For The Entire Country, But Especially For Black People. Release Us, And Great Things Will Happen!

Liberals Never, Ever Drop A Heinous Idea; They Just Change The Name. Abortion Becomes Choice, Communist Becomes Progressive, Communist Dictatorship Becomes People's Democratic Republic And Nikita Khrushchev Becomes Barack Obama.

Not All Muslims May Be Terrorists, But All Terrorists Are Muslims.

Whenever You Come Across A Screw-up This Big, You Know The Government Is Behind It.

Liberals Pretend To Believe That When Two Random Hoodlums Kill A Gay Man In Oklahoma, It's Evidence Of A National Trend, But When A Million People Buy A Book, It Proves Absolutely Nothing About The Book-buying Public.

We Need Somebody To Put Rat Poisoning In Justice Stevens' Creme Brulee. That's Just A Joke, For You In The Media.

I'd Pretty Much Debate Anybody. I Prefer To Debate Smart Liberals. I'm Not Saying This About Stephen Colbert But, Unfortunately, The Most Famous Liberals Generally Aren't The Smartest Ones. I Have A List Of The Smarter Liberals I Recommend.

We Were Terrified That Jones Would Settle. It Was Contrary To Our Purpose Of Bringing Down The President.

You Never Run Into A Fundamentalist Christian As Intolerant Of - Take Anything, You Know, Homosexuality As A Liberal Who Has Just Found A Lit Cigarette In A Nonsmoking Section.

It Is A Law Of Nature That Everything Run By The Government Will Get More Expensive And Worse Over Time. Everything Run By The Private Sector Will Get Better And Cheaper Over Time. The Fact That [obamacare] Starts This Badly Does Not Bode Well....we Want Healthcare Run On The Same System That Gave Us Cell Phones, Flat Screens, Jerry Garcia Chia Pets. Everything You Submit To The Free Market...keeps Getting Better And Better.

All Of These Riots Around The Globe Are Endangering The World. And Mobs Are Always Dangerous, Destructive Things That End Society. Liberal Policies Promote Mobs Because Liberals Crawl On The Mobs, The Destruction Wrought By The Mobs To Attain Power. Tere's Only One Way To React To A Mob To Save Civilized Society, And That Is To Smash The Mob. It Is Not To Mollycoddle The Mob.

But All Liberals Only Have Empathy For The Exact Same Victims - Always The Ones That Are Represented By Powerful Liberal Interest Groups.

When Conservative Judges Strike Down Laws, It's Because Of What's In The Constitution. When Liberal Judges Strike Down Laws (or Impose New Laws), It's Because Of What's In The New York Times

The Most Crazed Religious Fanatic Argues In More Calm And Reasoned Tones Than Liberals Responding To Statistics On Concealed-carry Permits.

Since Liberals Never Print Retractions, They Can Say Anything. What They Said In The Past Is Always Deemed Inadmissible And Unfair To Quote.

Looking At The Line-up Of Speakers At The (democratic National) Convention, I Have Developed The 7-11 Challenge: I Will Quit Making Fun Of, For Example, Dennis Kucinich, If He Can Prove He Can Run A 7-11 Properly For 8 Hours. We'll Even Let Him Have An Hour Or So Of Preparation Before We Open Up. Within 8 Hours, The Money Will Be Gone, The Store Will Be Empty, And He'll Be Explaining How Three 11-year Olds Came In And Asked For The Money And He Gave It To Them.

The Key To The U.n.'s Global Warming Study Was Man's Use Of Aerosol Spray. You Have To Know The French Were Involved In A Study Concluding That Arrid Extra Dry Is Destroying The Earth. In A World In Which Everyone Smelled, The French Would Be At No Disadvantage. Aerosol Spray. How Convenient.

If You Want To Find The Cool, Anti-establishment Rebels Who Don't Answer To The Man On College Campuses Today, You Have To Go To A Meeting Of The College Republicans. They Are Rebelling Against At Least 99 Percent Of Their Professors.

If Any Other Religious Cult Knew So Few Basic Facts About Its Own Seminal Beliefs As The Liberal Cult Does About Joe Mccarthy, Janet Reno Would Gas Them.

For Decades Now, The Democrats Have Had A Good Gig Buying The Votes Of Government Workers With Outrageous Salaries, Benefits And Work Rules - And Then Sticking Productive Earners With The Bill. But, Now, We're Out Of Money.

What I And Other Commentators Do Is Attempt To Move The Public Opinion. We Try To Change Minds.

Do You Know What Christianity Is? We Believe Your Religion [judaism], But You [jews] Have To Obey.

The Man Responsible For Keeping Americans Safe From Another Terrorist Attack On American Soil For Nearly Seven Years Now Will Go Down In History As One Of America's Greatest Presidents.

Gore Said Foreigners Are Not Worried About 'what The Terrorist Networks Are Going To Do, But About What We're Going To Do.' Good. They Should Be Worried. They Hate Us? We Hate Them. Americans Don't Want To Make Islamic Fanatics Love Us. We Want To Make Them Die. There's Nothing Like Horrendous Physical Pain To Quell Anger. Japanese Kamikazes Pilots Hated Us Once, Too. A Couple Of Well-aimed Nuclear Weapons Got Their Attention. Now They Are Gentle Little Lambs.

Swing Voters Are More Appropriately Known As The 'idiot Voters' Because They Have No Set Of Philosophical Principles. By The Age Of Fourteen, You're Either A Conservative Or A Liberal If You Have An Iq Above A Toaster.

When Contemplating A Shield That Would Protect America For Incoming Missiles, Democrats Suddenly Became Hardheaded Fiscal Conservatives. For The First Time In Recorded History, Liberals Were Concerned About The Cost And Usefulness Of A Government Program. These People Believe Federally Funded Art Therapy For The Homeless Will Pay For Itself. That You Can Take To The Bank. But A Shield To Repel Incoming Nuclear Missiles From American Soil They Said, Was Too Expensive And Wouldn't Work.

On One Hand, Liberals Are Enraged At The Heinousness Of Mark Sanford - Whom They Didn't Vote For - For Not Resigning And, On The Other, They're Enraged At Palin - Whom They Also Didn't Vote For - For Resigning.

If Mexican Farm Labor Is So Much Cheaper, Maybe We Should Be Growing Our Fruits And Vegetables In Mexico. There's Absolutely No Reason To Import Mexicans To Do Something They Could Do At Home And Then Sell To Us. I Believe This Is What Economists Call "competitive Advantage".

From The People Who Brought You "zero Tolerance," I Present The Gun-free Zone! Yippee! Problem Solved! Bam! Bam! Everybody Down! Hey, How Did That Deranged Loner Get A Gun Into This Gun-free Zone?

Liberal Soccer Moms Are Precisely As Likely To Receive Anthrax In The Mail As To Develop A Capacity For Linear Thinking.

So For Those Of You Who Haven't Read Any Of My Five Best-selling Books: Liberals Are Driven By Satan And Lie Constantly.

The Democrats Have No Actual Policy Proposals Of Their Own Unless Constant Carping Counts As A Policy.

The Presumption Of Innocence Only Means You Don't Go Right To Jail.

Presumption Of Innocence

The Idea Of A Bowed And Terrified Liberal Minority During Mccarthy's 'reign Of Terror' Is Poppycock. Then As Now, All Elite Opinion Was Against Mccarthy.

Like The Archers Of Agincourt, John O'neal And The 254 Swiftboat Veterans Took Down Their Own Haughty Frenchman.

Who's Gonna Give Me A Tv Show? I Didn't Work For An Impeached, Disbarred President Who Was Held In Contempt By A Federal Judge. That's What They Look For In Objective Reporters.

Any Growing Interest In Soccer Can Only Be A Sign Of The Nation's Moral Decay.

The New York Times Editorial Page Is Like A Ouija Board That Has Only Three Answers, No Matter What The Question. The Answers Are: Higher Taxes, More Restrictions On Political Speech And Stricter Gun Control.

I Was Morose That The Era Of Barack Obama Has Returned Us To A Period Where Everything Is Racist, Everyone Is Walking On Eggshells, And You Get The Moral Preening From White Liberals Who Don't Actually Even Know Any Black People. But, Oh, Do They Love To Get On Their High Horses And Accuse Republicans Of Being Racist For Opposing Very Liberal Government Policies And A Very Liberal Democratic President. It's An Extension Of The Civil Rights Label Being Slapped On Gay Marriage And Abortion. Allow Me To Be Bi-partisan For A Moment, And Love This Moment Because It Won't Last Long.

Scott Brown's Victory In Massachusetts Has Got To Have Ted Kennedy Rolling Over In His Grave, Spilling His Drink.

So Now It Turns Out That Thomas Jefferson Was Having Sex With Sally Hemings While Serving In The 101st Airborne During The Vietnam War.

As The Saying Goes: God Made Man And Woman; Colonel Colt Made Them Equal.

Democrats All Claim They'll Get Rough With The Terrorists, But They Can't Even Face Brit Hume.

Faggot Isn't Offensive To Gays; It's Got Nothing To Do With Gays.

The Only Subject Fewer Authentic Americans Cared About Than The Treatment Of Prisoners At Guantanamo Was World Cup Soccer. America Is An Epic Global Battle With Ruthless Savages Who Seek Our Destruction, And Liberals Are Feeling Sorry For The Terrorists.

The Most Dangerous Action A Woman Can Take When Faced With A Criminal Is To Resist With Her Fists: That Tends To Annoy Violent Criminals, And The Woman Will Very Likely Be Seriously Injured. But A Woman Who Takes The Advice Of Handgun Control Inc. And Passively Submits Is 2.5 Times More Likely To Be Injured Than A Woman Who Resists With A Gun. So If You Don't Want To Lie Back And Enjoy It, Get A Gun. Otherwise You May Never Become A Mom.

[liberals] Are Always Accusing Us Of Repressing Their Speech. I Say Let's Do It. Let's Repress Them. ... Frankly, I'm Not A Big Fan Of The First Amendment.

Democrats See Our Voluntary Military Supported By Taxpayer Dollars As Their Personal Salvation Army. Self-interested Behavior, Such As Deploying Troops To Serve The Nation, Is Considered Boorish In Manhattan Salons.

These Days, Even A Moderate Democrat Is Someone Who Thinks You Shouldn't Be Taught Fisting Until You're At Least 12 Years Old.

Where There's Smoke Around A Conservative, There Are Journalists Furiously Rubbing Two Sticks Together.

I Am The Illegal Alien Of Commentary. I Will Do The Jokes That No One Else Will Do.

I Wouldn't Know All That I Do About History, If I Spent My Time Watching Cartoons And Other Tv Shows.

I Don't Really Understand The Point About Carping About Every Casualty, Every Bombing, Every Death. War Is Hell. That's Why People Say War Is Hell.

It Is An Article Of Faith With The Democrats That They Must Fool Americans By Simulating Agreement With Normal People. The Winner Of The Democratic Primary Is Always The Candidate Who Does The Best Impersonation Of An American.

Liberals Are Stalwart Defenders Of Civil Liberties - Provided We're Only Talking About Criminals.

[m]ore Americans Work For Federal, State Or Local Government Than Work In Any Form Of Manufacturing. We Crossed That Rubicon About 10 Years Ago.

I've Never Seen People Enjoying Their Husbands' Deaths So Much

If Americans Loved Judicial Activism, Liberals Wouldn't Be Lying About What It Is. Judicial Activism Means Making Up Constitutional Rights In Order To Strike Down Laws The Justices Don't Like Based On Their Personal Preferences. It's Not Judicial Activism To Strike Down Laws Because They Violate The Constitution.

According To The California Hospital Association, Health Care For Illegal Aliens Is Costing State Taxpayers Well Over $1 Billion A Year. Eighty-four Hospitals Across California Have Already Been Forced To Close Because Of Unpaid Bills By Illegal Aliens.

Isn't Food Important? Why Not "universal Food Coverage"? If Politicians And Employers Had Guaranteed Us "free" Food 50 Years Ago, Today Democrats Would Be Wailing About The "food Crisis" In America, And You'd Be On The Phone With Your Food Care Provider Arguing About Whether Or Not A Reuben Sandwich With Fries Was Covered Under Your Plan.

Liberals Could Not Be Less Interested In Democracy When It Came To Taking Out Saddam Hussein... Now A Loyal American Ally [mubarak] Comes Under Attack And They Are Burning For Democracy.

I Think Obama Has Redefined The Democratic Party. It Used To Be The Party Of Acid, Amnesty, And Abortion, And Now It's Surrender, Socialism, And Subprime Mortgages.

When Every One Of Your Arguments Is Characterized An Attempt To Bring Back Slavery Or Resegregate Lunch Counters, It's A Little Hard To Have Any Sort Of Productive Debate.

Press Passes Can't Be That Hard To Come By If The White House Allows That Old Arab Helen Thomas To Sit Within Yards Of The President.

Nbc's The West Wing Is An Icon For Bad Stories; Gitmo Is A Place Where We Keep An Eye On Evil, Dangerous People Who Want To Kill Us.

I'm Sure There Are People Who Consider Themselves Democrats, Maybe Even Liberals, Who Are Good Christians, But If So I Do Not Think They Understand The Tenants Of Those Two Organizations.

Why Don't Republicans Spend All Their Airtime Attacking The Media For Lying About What Obama's Amnesty Does And What The Democrats Are Doing? It's Hard To Avoid Concluding That Republicans Aren't Trying To Make The Right Arguments. In Fact, It Kind Of Looks Like They're Intentionally Throwing The Fight On Amnesty. If A Republican Majority In Both Houses Of Congress Can't Stop Obama From Issuing Illegal Immigrants Social Security Cards And Years Of Back Welfare Payments, There Is No Reason To Vote Republican Ever Again.

Once Man's Connection To The Divine Is Denied, You Can Reason Yourself From Here To Anywhere.

It May Be Annoying, But The Rash Of Hijackings By Connecticut Wasp Girls Surely Explains The Time-consuming - But Still Somehow Completely Useless - Examination Of My Personal Effects. We All Have To Make Sacrifices For Airline Safety.

To Expiate The Pain Of Losing Her Firstborn Son In The Iraq War, Cindy Sheehan Decided To Cheer Herself Up By Engaging In Stalinist Agitprop Outside President Bush's Crawford Ranch, ... It's The Strangest Method Of Grieving I've Seen Since Paul Wellstone's Funeral. Someone Needs To Teach These Liberals How To Mourn.

...while A Sane World Would Not Employ 5-foot-tall Grandmothers As Law Enforcement Officers, A Sane World Would Also Not Give Full Body-cavity Searches To 5-foot-tall Grandmothers At Airports.

In A Comprehensive Study Of All Public Multiple Shooting Incidents In America Between 1977 And 1999, Economists John Lott And Bill Landes Found That The Only Public Policy That Reduced Both The Incidence And Casualties Of Such Shootings Were Concealed-carry Laws. Not Only Are There 60 Percent Fewer Gun Massacres After States Adopt Concealed-carry Laws, But The Death And Injury Rate Of Such Rampages Are Reduced By 80 Percent.

If We're So Cruel To Minorities, Why Do They Keep Coming Here? Why Aren't They Sneaking Across The Mexican Border To Make Their Way To The Taliban?

I Think There Should Be A Literacy Test And A Poll Tax For People To Vote.

Liberals Tell Amazing Lies About Guns And Everything Else.

Political Debate With Liberals Is Basically Impossible In America Today Because Liberals Are Calling Names While Conservatives Are Trying To Make Arguments.

In The Corporeal World, International Law Is Whatever The United States And Great Britain Say It Is.

Even If Corners Were Cut, (iran-contra) Was A Brilliant Scheme. There Is No Possibility That Anyone In Any Democratic Administration Would Have Gone To Such Lengths To Fund Anti-communist Forces. When Democrats Scheme From The White House, It's To Cover Up The President's Affair With An Intern. When Republicans Scheme, It's To Support Embattled Anti-communist Freedom Fighters Sold Out By The Democrats.

Democrats Cannot Conceive Of "hate Speech" Towards Christians Because, In Their Eyes, Christians Always Deserve It.

In The Spirit Of Reaching Across The Aisle, We Owe It To The Democrats To Show Their President The Exact Same Kind Of Respect And Loyalty That They Have Shown Our Recent Republican President.

Liberals Hate America, They Hate "flag-wavers", They Hate Abortion Opponents, They Hate All Religions Except Islam (post 9/11). Even Islamic Terrorists Don't Hate America Like Liberals Do. They Don't Have The Energy. If They Had That Much Energy, They'd Have Indoor Plumbing By Now.

That Is [liberalism's] Goal - To Destroy The Family... [liberals] Just Made Up This Gay Marriage Thing Gays Are Natural Conservatives.

Everything That Liberals Want They Call A Civil Right. This Avoids Them Having To Argue About It And Puts The Halo Around The Issue.

Back When They Supported Segregation, Lott And Thurmond Were Democrats.

What I'm Critical Of Is - The White House Attacking Conservatives, For Saying We're Elitist For Pointing Out That Harriet Miers Isn't Qualified To Sit On The Supreme Court. I'm Starting To Feel Sort Of Bad About - About Saying That. And I'm Annoyed With George Bush [jr.] For Putting Us In The Position Of Having To Say That.

If Those Kids Had Been Carrying Guns They Would Have Gunned Down This One Gunman... Don't Pray. Learn To Use Guns.

I Don't Think I Have An Unkind Word For Any.except Muslims. I've Been Cross With Them Since 9/11 2001. I Can't Remember Why But It Was Something Bad.

Liberals Love America Like O.j. Loved Nicole

Would That It Were So! ... That The American Military Were Targeting Journalists.

American Military

Weirdly Enough, The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Black People In The Last Twenty Or Thirty Years Was The O.j. Simpson Verdict Because It Shut Down The White Guilt Bank. And White Guilt Has Never Led To Anything Good. It's Brought Us Spiraling Crime Rates, Mostly With Black Victims, And A Permanent Underclass Living In Public Housing Projects. For Years, Liberals Cried That "law And Order" And "welfare Reform" Were Racist Code Words.

In Another Show Of America's Force To The World, When The Soviets Invaded Afghanistan, Carter Responded By Boycotting The Olympics. And Thus Was A Fearsome Blow Struck At Little Fourteen-year-old American Girls Who Had Spent Their Lives Training For The Olympics.

The Counties With The Highest Per Capita Income Aren't Near New York City Or Los Angeles - They're In The Washington, D.c. Area - A One-company Town Where The Company Is The Government. The Three Counties With The Highest Incomes In The Entire Country Are All Suburbs Of Washington. Eleven Of The 25 Counties With The Highest Incomes Are Near Washington.

They Spent The Night In Jail, Where Their Progressive Views On Gay Marriage Served Them Well.

Our Blacks Are Better Than Their's

I Support Guns And I Support The Death Penalty. Half Of My Interviews Are Convincing Liberals They're Not Liberal.

While The Form Of Treachery Varies Slightly From Case To Case, Liberals Always Manage To Take The Position That Most Undermines American Security.

Democrats Couldn't Care Less If People In Indiana Hate Them. But If Europeans Curl Their Lips, Liberals Can't Look At Themselves In The Mirror.

Clinton's Attempt To Socialize Healthcare Was The Second Most Disgusting Thing He Did In The Oval Office. I Can't Remember Was The First Thing Was.

It's Impossible To Talk Without Labels. "dog" Is A Label, But That Doesn't Mean It's Meaningless, Nor Does It Mean There's No Difference In A Shih Tzu And A Doberman.

Democrats Are Channeling Their Frustration With America's Imminent Military Victory In Afghanistan Into Hysterical Opposition To Reasonable National Security Measures At Home. (incidentally, This Ought To Prove Once And For All What A Bunch Of Paper Tigers The Russians Are. What Were They Doing Over There For 10 Years? It Hasn't Taken Us 10 Weeks.)

Taxes Are Like Abortion, And Not Just Because Both Are Grotesque Procedures Supported By Democrats. You're For Them Or Against Them. Taxes Go Up Or Down; Government Raises Taxes Or Lowers Them. But Democrats Will Not Let The Words "abortion" Or "tax Hikes" Pass Their Lips.

I Highly Approve Of Romney's Decision To Be Kind And Gentle To The Retard.

Liberals Want The Family Destroyed, They Want Religion Destroned, Because Then You Have Loyalty Directly To The State.

...sean Penn Claimed To Be 'serv[ing] The Country' By Giving Aid And Comfort To An Enemy About To Be Attacked By The Us. He Said It Made Him Feel More Patriotic To Dissent From The War Aims Of His Nation. It Is At Least A Counterintuitive Position. Most People Would Not Instantly Grasp How It Is More Patriotic To Always Root Against America. White Supremacists Should Try Claiming That Burning Crosses Is More Supportive Of Civil Rights Than Not Burning Them.

Science Is Something That You Have Facts. They Can Be Tested. They Can Be Checked. Heterosexual Aids, Another One.

The Religion That Has Transformed Western Civilization For Two Millennia Is A Blank Slate For Liberals. Their Closest Reference Point Is Conservative Christians, Meaning People You're Not Supposed To Hire. And These Are The People Who Carp About George Bush's Alleged Lack Of Intellectual Curiosity.

Harvard Graduates Just Cannot Shake The Idea That They Know Better Than Everyone Else What's Best For Us And That They're Capable Of Running A Mammoth, Unwieldy Government Program Providing Each One Of Us With The Precise Health Insurance We Need, At A Good Price, With No Waste Or Fraud. Trust Them, They Worked It All Out On Paper Their Junior Year.

Britain Makes It Absolutely, Blindingly Clear That It Is Liberal Social Welfare Policies. And They Have Turned A Good Chunk Of Their Native Population Into Animals. They Are Absolute Animals. They Are Not Humans With Free Will. They Eat, They Screw, They Drink.

Until You Can Intelligently Articulate The Other Side's Position, You Are Not An Adult. You Are A Liberal.

If It Were True That Conservatives Were Racist, Sexist, Homophobic, Fascist, Stupid, Inflexible, Angry, And Self-righteous, Shouldn't Their Arguments Be Easy To Deconstruct? Someone Who Is Making A Point Out Of Anger, Ideology, Inflexibility, Or Resentment Would Presumably Construct A Flimsy Argument. So Why Can't The Argument Itself Be Dismembered Rather Than The Speaker's Personal Style Or Hidden Motives? Why The Evasions?

I Think [women] Should Be Armed But Should Not Vote ... Women Have No Capacity To Understand How Money Is Earned. They Have A Lot Of Ideas On How To Spend It ... It's Always More Money On Education, More Money On Child Care, More Money On Day Care.

Whenever A Liberal Begins A Statement With 'i Don't Know Which Is More Frightening,' You Know The Answer Is Going To Be Pretty Clear.

The Only Beef Enron Employees Have With Top Management Is That Management Did Not Inform Employees Of The Collapse In Time To Allow Them To Get In On The Swindle. If Enron Executives Had Shouted, "head For The Hills!" The Employees Might Have Had Time To Sucker Other Americans Into Buying Wildly Over-inflated Enron Stock. Just Because Your Boss Is A Criminal Doesn't Make You A Hero.

Fundamentalist Muslim Terrorists Kill Three Thousand Americans, But America Isn't Supposed To Respond, Because If We Respond, They'll Respond. We Always Hear About 'karmic Retributions' And The 'cycle Of Violence' Only After We've Been Hit.

In The Druidical Religion Of Liberalism, Not Separating Your Recyclables Is A Sin, But Abortion Is Just A Medical Procedure.

The Question Isn't Whether We 'need' Guns. It's Wether The Government Should Have A Monopoly On Force

I Would Like Evolution To Join The Roster Of Other Discredited Religions...

Women Like Pamela Harriman And Patricia Duff Are Basically Anna Nicole Smith From The Waist Down. Let's Just Call It For What It Is. They're Whores.

This Is What Christianity Is. We Believe The Old Testament, But Ours Is More Like Federal Express. You Have To Obey Laws.

But Liberals Love To Drape Themselves In Decades-old Glories They Had Nothing To Do With.

Liberals Are Hopping Mad Because Rush Limbaugh Referred To Phony Soldiers As "phony Soldiers." They Claim He Was Accusing All Democrats In The Military Of Being "phony." True, All Democrats In The Military Are Not Phony Soldiers, But All Phony Soldiers Seem To Be Democrats.

Liberals Are More Upset When A Tree Is Chopped Down Than When A Child Is Aborted.

Liberals Despise The Rule Of Law Because It Interferes With Their Ability To Rule By Mob. They Love To Portray Themselves As The Weak Taking On The Powerful. But It Is The Least Powerful Who Suffer The Most Once The Rule Of Law Is Gone.

Liberals Dispute That Reagan Won The Cold War On The Basis Of Their Capacity To Put Mocking Quotation Marks Around The Word, Won. That's Pretty Much The Full Argument: Restate A Factual Proposition With Sneering Quote Marks.

Quotation Marks

The Really Amazing Part, To Me, Was When Florida Made It Into The Final Four, The Democrats Didn't Demand A Recount.

How About A New Game Show Called 'battle Begala?' Contestants Would Pick Any Obscure Bad Thing That Happened Anywhere In The World, And Paul Would Have 10 Seconds To Explain Why It Is President Bush's Fault.

Between 1995 And 2005, The Prison Population Grew By 30 Percent, Meaning An Additional Half Million Criminals Were Behind Bars, Rather Than Lurking In Dark Alleys With Switchblades. You Can Well Imagine Liberals' Surprise When The Crime Rate Went Down As More Criminals Were Put In Prison. The New York Times Was Reduced To Running Querulous Articles With Headlines Like Number In Prison Grows Despite Crime Reduction And As Crime Rate Drops, The Prison Rate Rises And The Debate Rages.

Democrats Are Firm Believers In The Welfare State For Their Own Constituents, Whether That's A Crack Addict Mother Of Five Or A Wall Street Banker.

They've Hit Us And We've Got To Hit Back Hard, And I'm Not Just Talking About The Terrorists.

It Is Puzzling Why Anyone Would Want To (become Governor Of California). It's Like Vying To Become Roseanne Barr's Next Husband. Sure You'd Get Your Name In The Paper, But Look At The Mess You'd Be Getting Yourself Into.

I Might Be In Favor Of National Healthcare If It Required All Democrats To Get Their Heads Examined.

The Afghan "negotiation Phase" Immediately Precedes The Traditional Afghan "surrender Phase." This Entails The Following: The Defeated Party Surrenders And Then Comes Out Shooting. This Is Repeated Several Times. Finally, The Vanquished Party Runs Out Of Ammunition And Is Forced To Surrender ' But Seriously This Time ' At Which Point The Victors Kill The Foreigners And Hug Their Fellow Afghans Like Long-lost Brothers.

Right Before The Civil War, Only 8% Of White People Owned Slaves. Some Plantations Would Have Hundreds And Hundreds Of Slaves, But The Vast Majority Of Whites Didn't Have Any.

My Favorite Founding Fathers, Christians Like John Adams, Were Absolutely Appalled By Slavery, And Did Not Own Slaves. I Think We're Going To Have To Call On God's Grace Not Only For Slavery, But For What We're Doing Now With Abortions.

You Can Describe Christianity And You Can Also Describe Liberalism. Christianity Has Certain Beliefs, Tenets, Doctrines. Not All Christians Are Always Living Up To Them. Similarly, Not All Liberals Are Living Up To The Tenets Of Liberalism.

Diversity" Is A Difficulty To Be Overcome, Not An Advantage To Be Sought. True, America Does A Better Job Than Most At Accommodating A Diverse Population. We Also Do A Better Job At Curing Cancer And Containing Pollution. But No One Goes Around Mindlessly Exclaiming: "cancer Is A Strength!" "pollution Is Our Greatest Asset!

This Is The Difference Between Conservatives And Liberals. Liberals Want Justices To Vote A Certain Way. We, Conservatives, Want A Particular Legal Philosophy, A Philosophy For How To Interpret The Constitution.

The Truth Cannot Be Delivered With Novocaine.

A Married Woman, The Safest Place For Any Woman To Be Is At Home With Her Husband.

In Other Words, Under Attorney General John Ashcroft, The Fbi, The Ins And The Department Of Justice Are So Out Of Control That They Have Actually Begun To Enforce U.s. Immigration Laws.

We're Bombarded With Liberal Propaganda 24/7, From The Early Morning Shows, Hollywood Movies, Documentaries And Sitcoms, All Major Newspapers, Fashion Magazines, The Sports Pages, Public Schools, College Professors And Administrators, Etcetera, Etcetera, Etcetera. Unless Liberals Specifically Seek Out Ann Coulter Books And Columns, Which I Highly Recommend, Or Tune Into Fox News Or Conservative Talk Radio, They Have No Idea What Conservatives Are Thinking.

I'm More Of A Man Than Any Liberal.

No Matter What Argument You Make Against Evolution, The Response Is Well, You Know, It's Possible To Believe In Evolution And Believe In God. Yes, And It's Possible To Believe In Spiderman And Believe In God, But That Doesn't Prove Spiderman Is True.

Ironically, Since Obama Was Elected, For The First Time In My Life I'm Sometimes Not Proud Of My Country.

Clinton Masturbates In The Sinks.

Ed "the Truth Is Illegal" Markey Responded To Teamster Support For Anwr By Dismissively Sniffing, It Was Only "one Issue." Luckily, The Democrats Have All Those Other Issues Dear To The Heart Of The Average Blue-collar Worker: Abortion On Demand, Gay Marriage And Taxpayer-funded Crucifixes Submerged In Urine.

We Just Want Jews To Be Perfected, As They Say.

Only A War That Serves No Conceivable National Interest Gets The New York Time's Endorsement. Liberals Warm To The Idea Of American Mothers Weeping For Their Sons, But Only If Their Deaths Will Not Make America Any Safer.

If A University Official's Letter Accusing A Speaker Of Having A Proclivity To Commit Speech Crimes Before She's Given The Speech - Which Then Leads To Facebook Postings Demanding That Ann Coulter Be Hurt, A Massive Riot And A Police-ordered Cancellation Of The Speech - Is Not Hate Speech, Then There Is No Such Thing As Hate Speech.

David Axelrod Says We Need To Inspire More Young People To Be Journalists? How About Inspiring Journalists To Be Journalists?

I Promise You: No American Whose Great-grandfather Was Born Here Is Watching Soccer. One Can Only Hope That, In Addition To Learning English, These New Americans Will Drop Their Soccer Fetish With Time.

At Every Other Workplace In The Nation - Even Mal-mart! - Workers Are Being Laid Off. But No One At Any Of The Bloated Government Bureaucracies Ever Need Fear Receiving A Pink Slip. All 64,750 Employees At The Department Of Health And Human Services Are Apparently Absolutely Crucial To The Smooth Functioning Of The Department.

Canada Has Become Trouble Recently ... It's Always The Worst Americans Who Go There ... We Could Have Taken Them Over So Easy. But I Only Want The Western Part, With The Ski Areas, The Cowboys, And The Right Wingers. They're The Only Good Parts Of Canada.

Teddy Kennedy's Big New Idea Is To Wheel Out His 18th Proposal To Raise The Minimum Wage. He's Been Doing This Since Wages Were Paid In Spanish Doubloons (which Coincidentally Are Now Mostly Found Underwater). Kennedy Refuses To Countenance Any Risky Schemes Like Trying To Grow The Economy So People Making Minimum Wage Get Raises Because They've Been Promoted. Kennedy's Going Down And He's Taking The Party With Him! (recognize The Pattern?)

I Think There Are More Transgendered In America Than There Are People Who Worry About The Comfort And Security Who Broke In Our Country Illegally, Who Are Living Here Illegally, Are Taking Jobs Illegally, How Quickly It Moves Doesn't Really Matter.

Gays (homosexuals) Usually Bring Up The Argument About All The Straight Couples Living In 'sham' Marriages, But I See No Point In Dragging The Clintons Into This

Talking To Liberals Is Much More Fun Now That We Have Lexis-nexis.

Obamacare Would Never Have Passed Without Decades Of Massive Immigration From The Third World. Liberals Didn't Change Any Minds - They Changed The Voters.

Even Obama's Staunchest Supporters Are Starting To Leave Him. Last Week Michelle Obama Demanded To See A Copy Of His Birth Certificate.

Judging By Their Positions At The Time, Rather Than Their Post Hoc Allegations, Democrats Adored The Soviet Union. Congressional Democrats Repeatedly Opposed Funding Anti-communist Rebels, They Opposed Reagan's Military Build-up, They Opposed Building A Shield To Protect America From Incoming Missiles, They Opposed Putting Missiles In Europe. As A Rule, Democrats Opposed Anything Opposed By Their Cherished Soviet Union.

Moderation In The Defense Of Liberty Is No Virtue.

To Be Sure, Conservative Radio Talk Show Hosts Have A Built-in Audience Unavailable To Liberals: People Driving Cars To Some Sort Of Job.

Marriage Is Under Attack From So Many Different Areas. There Should Be Benefits Associated With Married People. Life Is Unfair. Maybe You Won't Find The Right Person And You Won't End Up Getting Married. Oh, Well, Life Is Unfair. But Married People, Because Of Their Capacity To Have Children, Even If They're Not Going To End Up Having Children, Even If They're Unable To Bear Children, Marriage Is An Institution That Is Absolutely Central To Civilization.

In June 2002, Airport Security Searched Al Gore. There's A Lot Not To Like About Gore, But He's Not A Terrorist. Gore Said He Was Glad He Was Searched. Why? To Spare A Terrorist The Trouble? This Is A Serious National Issue; Why Must Liberals Lie? Searching Al Gore Is Purely A Religious Act. It Is The Purposeless Fetishistic Performance Of Ritual In Accordance With The Civic Religion Of Liberalism.

Perhaps Like The Many And Various Meanings Of The Word "we," Liberals Use The Word "unsubstantiated" To Mean "tested Repeatedly And Proved True."

The Fact That A Republican Is In The Late Senator Kennedy's Old Seat Probably Must Have Him Rolling In His Grave, Probably Spilling His Drink.

It Confirms My Idea That You Also Need More Liberal Gun Laws. Guns Lead To A Polite Society, As We Like To Say In The United States. And I Think That All Of Western Canada Would Agree With Me.

Some Jobs Are So Dirty You Can Only Send In Someone Who Has The Finely Honed Hatred Of Liberals Acquired At Elite Universities To Do Them.

Liberals Don't Love Big Government Because They Think It's Efficient, Compassionate, Fair Or Even Remotely Useful. They Support Big Government Because They Are Guaranteed The Support Of Nearly Everyone Who Works For The Government.

Married Women Vote Republican; Single Women Vote Democratic. That's Why Liberals Promote Policies To Break Up Families. Every Social Malady Is A Victory For The Left. A Couple Gets Divorced And Liberals Say, "yay! Another Democratic Voter!" A Child Is Born Out Of Wedlock And Liberals Say, "yay! Another Democratic Voter!" A Person Gets Addicted To Drugs And Liberals Say, "yay! Another Democratic Voter!"

I Think Being Called A She-devil By A Trial Lawyer Is Meant As A Compliment.

There Is A Growing Body Of Evidence That Radiation In Excess Of What The Government Says Are The Minimum Amounts We Should Be Exposed To Are Actually Good For You And Reduce Cases Of Cancer.

You Don't Want The Republicans In Power, Does That Mean You Want A Dictatorship, Gay Boy?

Democrats Don't Resent The Rich On Behalf Of The Poor. They Resent The Rich On Behalf Of The Government.

Let's Say I Go Out Every Night, I Meet A Guy And Have Sex With Him. Good For Me. I'm Not Married.

I'm Getting A Little Tired Of Politicians Trying To Prove How 'moderate' And 'centrist' They Are By Taking More Of My Money And Freedom. Where's This Center - Somewhere Between Lenin And Stalin?

I Think [whitewater]'s Going To Prevent The First Lady From Running For Senate.

I'm Thinking Of Writing A Book On National Health Care. It Will Be 2,000 Pages, And You'll Have Two Hours To Read It.

My Only Regret With Timothy Mcveigh Is He Did Not Go To The New York Times Building.

I'm Not Going To Be Lectured To.

As Long As American Liberals Are Going To Keep Announcing That They're Embarrassed For Their Country, How About Being Embarrassed By Our Public Schools Or By Our Ridiculous Trial Lawyer Culture That Other Countries Find Laughable?

If You Can Somehow Force A Liberal Into A Point-counterpoint Argument, His Retorts Will Bear No Relation To What You’ve Said - Unless You Were In Fact Talking About Your Looks, Your Age, Your Weight, Your Personal Obsessions, Or Whether You Are A Fascist. In The Famous Liberal Two-step, They Leap From One Idiotic Point To The Next, So You Can Never Nail Them. It’s Like Arguing With Someone With Attention Deficit Disorder.

A False Argument Should Be Refuted, Not Named. That's The Basic Idea Behind Freedom Of Speech. Arguments By Name-calling, Rather Than Truth And Light, Can Generally Be Presumed Fraudulent.

Listening To Liberals Invoke The Sanctity Of "science" To Promote Their Crackpot Ideas Creates The Same Uneasy Feeling As Listening To Bill Clinton Cite Scripture.

Instead Of Seeking Wisdom, Liberals Desire To Be Seen As Clever By Being Counterintuitive, Crazy, And Outre.

All We Can Do Is Politely Ask Aliens From Suspect Nations To Leave ... While We Sort The Peace-loving Immigrants From The Murderous Fanatics.... Muslim Immigrants Who Agree To Spy On The Millions Of Muslim Citizens Unaffected By The Deportation Order Can Stay.

Six Imams Removed From A Us Airways Flight From Minneapolis To Phoenix Are Calling On Muslims To Boycott The Airline. If Only We Could Get Muslims To Boycott All Airlines, We Could Dispense With Airport Security Altogether.

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