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The Religion That Has Transformed Western Civilization For Two Millennia Is A Blank Slate For Liberals. Their Closest Reference Point Is Conservative Christians, Meaning People You're Not Supposed To Hire. And These Are The People Who Carp About George Bush's Alleged Lack Of Intellectual Curiosity.

-Ann Coulter

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The Religion That Has

Ann Coulter

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The Religion That Has Transformed Western Civilization For Two Millennia Is A Blank Slate For Liberals. Their Closest Reference Point Is Conservative Christians, Meaning People You're Not Supposed To Hire. And These Are The People Who Carp About George Bush's Alleged Lack Of Intellectual Curiosity.

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Our Gays Are More Macho Than Their Straights.

It May Be Annoying, But The Rash Of Hijackings By Connecticut Wasp Girls Surely Explains The Time-consuming - But Still Somehow Completely Useless - Examination Of My Personal Effects. We All Have To Make Sacrifices For Airline Safety.

They've Hit Us And We've Got To Hit Back Hard, And I'm Not Just Talking About The Terrorists.

I Don't Think We [the Usa] Need More Troops. I Think We Need To Be Less Worried About Civilian Casualties.

[m]ore Americans Work For Federal, State Or Local Government Than Work In Any Form Of Manufacturing. We Crossed That Rubicon About 10 Years Ago.

Since Vice President Al Gore Is Constantly Making Things Up, It Should Come As No Surprise That He Wants Supreme Court Justices Who Will Do The Same. As Gore Put It, He Will Appoint Judges Who View The Constitution As A 'document That Grows'.

In Fact Sarah Palin Has Created More Jobs Than Obama Has. She Created Eleven Jobs Fact-checking At The Ap Just For The Palin Autobiography.

It Is Puzzling Why Anyone Would Want To (become Governor Of California). It's Like Vying To Become Roseanne Barr's Next Husband. Sure You'd Get Your Name In The Paper, But Look At The Mess You'd Be Getting Yourself Into.

I Highly Approve Of Romney's Decision To Be Kind And Gentle To The Retard.

If You Don't Hate Clinton And The People Who Labored To Keep Him In Office, You Don't Love Your Country.

So Now It Turns Out That Thomas Jefferson Was Having Sex With Sally Hemings While Serving In The 101st Airborne During The Vietnam War.

In Another Show Of America's Force To The World, When The Soviets Invaded Afghanistan, Carter Responded By Boycotting The Olympics. And Thus Was A Fearsome Blow Struck At Little Fourteen-year-old American Girls Who Had Spent Their Lives Training For The Olympics.

I Really Liked Deadheads And The Whole Dead Concert Scene: The Tailgating, The Tie-dye Uniforms, The Camaraderie It Was Like Nascar For Potheads.

Liberals Love America Like O.j. Loved Nicole

Walking Back From The Convention Site I Chatted With A Normal Bostonian For Several Blocks -- Who Must Have Identified Me Through Our Covert System Of Signals. He Was Mostly Bemused By The Democrats' Primetime Speakers And Told Me He Used To Be An Independent, But For The Last 20 Years Found Himself Voting Mostly Republican. Then He Corrected Himself And Said He Votes For The American.

If You Can Somehow Force A Liberal Into A Point-counterpoint Argument, His Retorts Will Bear No Relation To What You’ve Said - Unless You Were In Fact Talking About Your Looks, Your Age, Your Weight, Your Personal Obsessions, Or Whether You Are A Fascist. In The Famous Liberal Two-step, They Leap From One Idiotic Point To The Next, So You Can Never Nail Them. It’s Like Arguing With Someone With Attention Deficit Disorder.

Being Anti-war In Hollywood Was An Act Of Bravery On The Order Of The Keynote Speaker At A Plo Dinner Making Jokes About Ariel Sharon.

I'm Getting A Little Tired Of Politicians Trying To Prove How 'moderate' And 'centrist' They Are By Taking More Of My Money And Freedom. Where's This Center - Somewhere Between Lenin And Stalin?

Liberals Hate America, They Hate "flag-wavers", They Hate Abortion Opponents, They Hate All Religions Except Islam (post 9/11). Even Islamic Terrorists Don't Hate America Like Liberals Do. They Don't Have The Energy. If They Had That Much Energy, They'd Have Indoor Plumbing By Now.

If We Took Away Women's Right To Vote, We'd Never Have To Worry About Another Democrat President.

What I And Other Commentators Do Is Attempt To Move The Public Opinion. We Try To Change Minds.

If You Attack The Clintons Publicly, Make Sure All Your Friends Know That You Are Not Planning Suicide, That You're Not Careless When You Drive A Car.

When Minutemen Leader Jim Gilchrist And His Black Colleague Marvin Stewart Were Invited By The College Republicans To Speak At Columbia Last Year, The Tolerant, Free-speech-loving Columbia Students Violently Attacked Them, Shutting Down The Speech.

The New York Times And The Rest Of The Mainstream Media Will Only Refer To Partial Birth Abortion As 'what Its Opponents Refer To As Partial Birth Abortions.' What Do Its Supporters Call It? Casual Fridays? Bean-with-bacon Potato Chip Dip? Uh . . . Steve?

I Think [whitewater]'s Going To Prevent The First Lady From Running For Senate.

To Expiate The Pain Of Losing Her Firstborn Son In The Iraq War, Cindy Sheehan Decided To Cheer Herself Up By Engaging In Stalinist Agitprop Outside President Bush's Crawford Ranch, ... It's The Strangest Method Of Grieving I've Seen Since Paul Wellstone's Funeral. Someone Needs To Teach These Liberals How To Mourn.

I Am Emboldened By My Looks To Say Things Republican Men Wouldn't.

Why Is It That The Same People Who Have The Least Confidence In The Police And The Military Are The Most Willing To Allow Only The Police And The Military To Have Guns?

There Is A Growing Body Of Evidence That Radiation In Excess Of What The Government Says Are The Minimum Amounts We Should Be Exposed To Are Actually Good For You And Reduce Cases Of Cancer.

His Pomposity Is Overshadowed Only By His Rank Stupidity

On One Hand, Liberals Are Enraged At The Heinousness Of Mark Sanford - Whom They Didn't Vote For - For Not Resigning And, On The Other, They're Enraged At Palin - Whom They Also Didn't Vote For - For Resigning.

One Recent Menu For Suspected Terrorists At Guantanamo Consisted Of Orange Glazed Chicken, Fresh Fruit Crepe, Steamed Peas And Mushrooms, And Rice Pilaf. Sounds Like The Sort Of Thing You'd Get At Windows On The World - If It Still Existed.

I Defy Any Of My Coreligionists To Tell Me They Do Not Laugh At The Idea Of Dawkins Burning In Hell.

The Infernal Flag-waving After 9/11 Nearly Drove Liberals Out Of Their Gourds. For The Left, 'flag-waving' Is An Epithet.

To Be Sure, Conservative Radio Talk Show Hosts Have A Built-in Audience Unavailable To Liberals: People Driving Cars To Some Sort Of Job.

The Democrats Pretended To Care About Black People For About Five Minutes To Help Their Electoral Process, And Then Civil Rights Suddenly Became Abortion On Demand, Gay Marriage, Rights For The Homeless, Etc.

As Bush Said, After Detailing Some Of Saddam Hussein's Charming Practices: “if This Is Not Evil, Then Evil Has No Meaning.” It's Not As If Anyone Is Worried That We're Making A Horrible Miscalculation And Could Be Removing The Iraqi Abraham Lincoln By Mistake.

Back When They Supported Segregation, Lott And Thurmond Were Democrats.

I Never Wanted To Be Famous And The Only Part I Like Is That It Means People Are Reading My Books And Listening To Me On Tv And Radio.

The Democrats Appear To Be The Only People Who Still Believe There Is Any Efficacy To The Un.

Republicans Are Afraid To Act In Accordance With The Election Results. Republicans Seem To Be In Denial About Election Results. It's One Thing For Democrats To Be In Denial About The Republican Electoral Juggernaut, But It's Strange That Republicans Are In Denial About It Too.

Election Results

You Will Find Liberals Always Rooting For Savages Against Civilization.

I Think Obama Has Redefined The Democratic Party. It Used To Be The Party Of Acid, Amnesty, And Abortion, And Now It's Surrender, Socialism, And Subprime Mortgages.

If A University Official's Letter Accusing A Speaker Of Having A Proclivity To Commit Speech Crimes Before She's Given The Speech - Which Then Leads To Facebook Postings Demanding That Ann Coulter Be Hurt, A Massive Riot And A Police-ordered Cancellation Of The Speech - Is Not Hate Speech, Then There Is No Such Thing As Hate Speech.

...liberals Said The War Was A Failure Because We Hadn't Captured Abu Musab Al-zarqawi. Then We Killed Al-zarqawi And A Half-dozen Of His Aides In An Air Raid. Then They Said The War Was A Failure Because ... You Get The Picture.

If I'm Going To Say Anything About John Edwards In The Future, I'll Just Wish He Had Been Killed In A Terrorist Assassination Plot.

Why Couldn't Obama Have Picked Somebody Respectable As His Running Mate, You Know, Like John Kerry Did?

This Is The Way Addled Liberals Really Think. Even As They Champion Sucking The Brains Out Of Little Babies, They Think Of Themselves As Indelibly Compassionate Because They Favor An Overweening, Behemoth Federal Government.

This Is What Christians Consider Themselves: Perfected Jews.

Stem-cell Research On Embryos Is An Even Worse Excuse For The Slaughter Of Life Than Abortion. No Woman Is Even Being Spared An Inconvenience This Time.... It's Just Harvest And Slaughter, Harvest And Slaughter, Harvest And Slaughter.

By 1973, John Kerry Had Already Accused American Soldiers Of Committing War Crimes In Vietnam, Thrown Someone Else's Medals To The Ground In An Anti-war Demonstration, And Married His First Heiress.

I'm Against Reparations. At This Point, Blacks Should Just Be Handing Money To Themselves.

As Long As American Liberals Are Going To Keep Announcing That They're Embarrassed For Their Country, How About Being Embarrassed By Our Public Schools Or By Our Ridiculous Trial Lawyer Culture That Other Countries Find Laughable?

What's Curious About The Left's Current Obsession With Timothy Mcveigh Is That It Proves That - Despite A Frantic Search For 15 Years - Liberals Have Come Across No Better Evidence Of Burgeoning "right-wing Extremist" Violence Than A Drug-taking, Self-described "agnostic" Who Was Thrown Out Of The Michigan Militia And Who Proclaimed, "science Is My Religion." That Sounds More Like Bill Maher Than Rush Limbaugh.

The Democratic Party Supports Criminals And Islamic Terrorists But Has No Sympathy For Taxpayers.

Hollywood Liberals Could Not Be Reached For Comment On The Cost Of The Inauguration Because They Were Being Fitted For Gowns And Jewelry Worth Millions Of Dollars In Anticipation Of Oscar Night.

The Only Subject Fewer Authentic Americans Cared About Than The Treatment Of Prisoners At Guantanamo Was World Cup Soccer. America Is An Epic Global Battle With Ruthless Savages Who Seek Our Destruction, And Liberals Are Feeling Sorry For The Terrorists.

There Are Some Honorable Politicians; And God Bless Them, There Aren't Many Of Them - But They're Narcissistic. They Need People To Love Them.

[senator]torricelli [d-nj] Will Leave Public Office With Just The Clothes On His Back, A Rolex Watch And Other Assorted Jewelry, A Tv Set, A Couple Of Racks Of Italian Suits, Some Jets Tickets, A Grandfather Clock And Three Paper Sacks Filled With Small, Unmarked Bills.

The Fundamental Difference Is That Conservatives Think Man Is Created In God's Image. Liberals Think They [themselves] Are Gods - They Want To Create Utopia On Earth With Wealth Redistribution, Breaking The Bonds Of Marriage And Ties Between Parents And A Child.

Isn't Food Important? Why Not "universal Food Coverage"? If Politicians And Employers Had Guaranteed Us "free" Food 50 Years Ago, Today Democrats Would Be Wailing About The "food Crisis" In America, And You'd Be On The Phone With Your Food Care Provider Arguing About Whether Or Not A Reuben Sandwich With Fries Was Covered Under Your Plan.

You Can Describe Christianity And You Can Also Describe Liberalism. Christianity Has Certain Beliefs, Tenets, Doctrines. Not All Christians Are Always Living Up To Them. Similarly, Not All Liberals Are Living Up To The Tenets Of Liberalism.

The Most Dangerous Action A Woman Can Take When Faced With A Criminal Is To Resist With Her Fists: That Tends To Annoy Violent Criminals, And The Woman Will Very Likely Be Seriously Injured. But A Woman Who Takes The Advice Of Handgun Control Inc. And Passively Submits Is 2.5 Times More Likely To Be Injured Than A Woman Who Resists With A Gun. So If You Don't Want To Lie Back And Enjoy It, Get A Gun. Otherwise You May Never Become A Mom.

This Week's Winner For Best Comedy Line About The War Is New York Democratic Sen. Charles Schumer. Referring To - Well, It Doesn't Really Matter What He Was Referring To.

When Obama Boasts That It Will Be A Huge Boon To The Economy To Give Amnesty To Millions Of Low-wage Workers, Who Won't Pay Income Taxes But Will Need A Lot Of Government Services, Remember: Obamacare Was Supposed To Save Money, Too.

Like So Many Liberal Icons, Marx Seldom Bathed And Left His Wife And Children In Poverty. As Schlafly Says, No Wonder Liberal Women Think Men Are Pigs: Their Men Are Pigs.

Liberal Moms Like Soccer Because It's A Sport In Which Athletic Talent Finds So Little Expression That Girls Can Play With Boys. No Serious Sport Is Co-ed, Even At The Kindergarten Level.

The Democrats Are Giving Aid And Comfort To The Enemy For No Purpose Other Than Giving Aid And Comfort To The Enemy. There Is No Plausible Explanation For The Democrats' Behavior Other Than That They Long To See U.s. Troops Shot, Humiliated, And Driven From The Field Of Battle.

Obama Said, 'now Let Me Be Clear, Issues Of Women's Equality Are By No Means Simply An Issue For Islam.' No, He Said, 'the Struggle For Women's Equality Continues In Many Aspects Of American Life.' So On One Hand, 12-year-old Girls Are Stoned To Death For The Crime Of Being Raped In Muslim Countries. But On The Other Hand, We Still Don't Have Enough Female Firefighters Here In America.

Even If Corners Were Cut, (iran-contra) Was A Brilliant Scheme. There Is No Possibility That Anyone In Any Democratic Administration Would Have Gone To Such Lengths To Fund Anti-communist Forces. When Democrats Scheme From The White House, It's To Cover Up The President's Affair With An Intern. When Republicans Scheme, It's To Support Embattled Anti-communist Freedom Fighters Sold Out By The Democrats.

No Matter What Argument You Make Against Evolution, The Response Is Well, You Know, It's Possible To Believe In Evolution And Believe In God. Yes, And It's Possible To Believe In Spiderman And Believe In God, But That Doesn't Prove Spiderman Is True.

Liberals Become Indignant When You Question Their Patriotism, But Simultaneously Work Overtime To Give Terrorists A Cushion For The Next Attack And Laugh At Dumb Americans Who Love Their Country And Hate The Enemy.

Liberals Don't Mind Discussing Who Is More Patriotic If Patriotism Is Defined As Redistributing Income And Vetoing The Pledge Of Allegiance. Only If Patriotism Is Defined As Supporting America Do They Get Testy And Drone On About 'mccarthyism.'

Americans Cannot Comprehend How Their Fellow Countrymen Could Not Love Their Country. But The Left's Anti-americanism Is Intrinsic To Their Entire Worldview. Liberals Promote The Right Of Islamic Fanatics For The Same Reason They Promote The Rights Of Adulterers, Pornographers, Abortionists, Criminals, And Communists. They Instinctively Root For Anarchy Against Civilization. The Inevitable Logic Of The Liberal Position Is To Be For Treason.

It’s Often Said That Those Who Are Unduly Bothered By Gays Are Latent Homosexuals. Isn’t It Possible That People Obsessed With Racism Are Themselves Racist.

This Is The Difference Between Conservatives And Liberals. Liberals Want Justices To Vote A Certain Way. We, Conservatives, Want A Particular Legal Philosophy, A Philosophy For How To Interpret The Constitution.

According To The California Hospital Association, Health Care For Illegal Aliens Is Costing State Taxpayers Well Over $1 Billion A Year. Eighty-four Hospitals Across California Have Already Been Forced To Close Because Of Unpaid Bills By Illegal Aliens.

Whenever A Liberal Begins A Statement With 'i Don't Know Which Is More Frightening,' You Know The Answer Is Going To Be Pretty Clear.

The Key To The U.n.'s Global Warming Study Was Man's Use Of Aerosol Spray. You Have To Know The French Were Involved In A Study Concluding That Arrid Extra Dry Is Destroying The Earth. In A World In Which Everyone Smelled, The French Would Be At No Disadvantage. Aerosol Spray. How Convenient.

...while A Sane World Would Not Employ 5-foot-tall Grandmothers As Law Enforcement Officers, A Sane World Would Also Not Give Full Body-cavity Searches To 5-foot-tall Grandmothers At Airports.

With The Terrible Earthquake And Resulting Tsunami That Have Devastated Japan, The Only Good News Is That Anyone Exposed To Excess Radiation From The Nuclear Power Plants Is Now Probably Much Less Likely To Get Cancer.

Moderation In The Defense Of Liberty Is No Virtue.

There Is No More A 'political Middle' Than There Is A Family In America With 2.3 Children. People With Opinions Take Sides. Contrary To What You've Heard, It's Actually More Important To Stand For Something Than It Is For Everybody To 'just Get Along'.

I Would Like Evolution To Join The Roster Of Other Discredited Religions...

Taxes Are Like Abortion, And Not Just Because Both Are Grotesque Procedures Supported By Democrats. You're For Them Or Against Them. Taxes Go Up Or Down; Government Raises Taxes Or Lowers Them. But Democrats Will Not Let The Words "abortion" Or "tax Hikes" Pass Their Lips.

I Was Morose That The Era Of Barack Obama Has Returned Us To A Period Where Everything Is Racist, Everyone Is Walking On Eggshells, And You Get The Moral Preening From White Liberals Who Don't Actually Even Know Any Black People. But, Oh, Do They Love To Get On Their High Horses And Accuse Republicans Of Being Racist For Opposing Very Liberal Government Policies And A Very Liberal Democratic President. It's An Extension Of The Civil Rights Label Being Slapped On Gay Marriage And Abortion. Allow Me To Be Bi-partisan For A Moment, And Love This Moment Because It Won't Last Long.

Liberals Go Straight To Ugly Racist Stereotypes When Attacking Conservative Blacks, Calling Them Oversexualized, Stupid And/or Incompetent.

This Is No Time To Be Precious About Locating The Exact Individuals Directly Involved In This Particular Terrorist Attack.... We Know Who The Homicidal Maniacs Are. They Are The Ones Cheering And Dancing Right Now. We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity.

Long Before There Was Discrimination Against Blacks, There Was Discrimination Against White Southerners. When Large Numbers Of These Country People Moved North During World War Ii, They Were Aggressively Excluded From Neighborhoods, Jobs, And Homes - Not Because Of Their Skin Color, But Their Accents.

Ironically, Since Obama Was Elected, For The First Time In My Life I'm Sometimes Not Proud Of My Country.

The Episcopalians Don't Demand Much In The Way Of Actual Religious Belief. They Have Girl Priests, Gay Priests, Gay Bishops, Gay Marriages? It's Much Like The New York Times Editorial Board. They Acknowledge The Ten Commandments? Or "moses' Talking Points"? But Hasten To Add That They're Not Exactly "carved In Stone."

Not Exactly Smashing Stereotypes Of Liberals As Mincing Pantywaists, The Left's Entire Contribution To The War Effort Thus Far Has Been To Whine.

When Conservative Judges Strike Down Laws, It's Because Of What's In The Constitution. When Liberal Judges Strike Down Laws (or Impose New Laws), It's Because Of What's In The New York Times

Not All Muslims May Be Terrorists, But All Terrorists Are Muslims.

Any Growing Interest In Soccer Can Only Be A Sign Of The Nation's Moral Decay.

Liberals Believe In Burning The American Flag, Urinating On Crucifixes, And Passing Out Birth Control Pills To 11-year-olds Without Telling Their Parents -- But God Forbid An Infidel Touch A Quran At Guantanamo.

Obamacare Would Never Have Passed Without Decades Of Massive Immigration From The Third World. Liberals Didn't Change Any Minds - They Changed The Voters.

Between 1995 And 2005, The Prison Population Grew By 30 Percent, Meaning An Additional Half Million Criminals Were Behind Bars, Rather Than Lurking In Dark Alleys With Switchblades. You Can Well Imagine Liberals' Surprise When The Crime Rate Went Down As More Criminals Were Put In Prison. The New York Times Was Reduced To Running Querulous Articles With Headlines Like Number In Prison Grows Despite Crime Reduction And As Crime Rate Drops, The Prison Rate Rises And The Debate Rages.

For Decades Now, [fuller] Torrey Has Been Warning America What Would Happen If The Dangerously Mentally Ill Were Deinstitutionalized, And It's All Come True. Today, The Only Place We Can Put Mental Patients Is On Msnbc.

How About A New Game Show Called 'battle Begala?' Contestants Would Pick Any Obscure Bad Thing That Happened Anywhere In The World, And Paul Would Have 10 Seconds To Explain Why It Is President Bush's Fault.

I'm A Christian First, And A Mean-spirited, Bigoted Conservative Second, And Don't You Ever Forget It. You Know Who Else Was Kind Of "divisive" In Terms Of Challenging The Status Quo And The Powers-that-be Of His Day? Jesus Christ.

You Don't Want The Republicans In Power, Does That Mean You Want A Dictatorship, Gay Boy?

I Think [women] Should Be Armed But Should Not Vote ... Women Have No Capacity To Understand How Money Is Earned. They Have A Lot Of Ideas On How To Spend It ... It's Always More Money On Education, More Money On Child Care, More Money On Day Care.

Moore's Only Concession To The Democrats' Role-playing Is To Deny That He Is A Democrat, Hoping Enough Americans Were Taught By Public School Teachers That No One Will Know How To Look Up Moore's Voter Registration Card. Democrat.

You Want To Be Careful Not To Become Just A Blowhard.

Most People In The Tea Party Are Nice, But That Hasn't Stopped Liberals From Hating Them.

Liberals Can't Just Come Out And Say, They Want To Take More Of Our Money, Kill Babies, And Discriminate On The Basis Of Race.

Liberals Claim To Love Gays When It Allows Them To Vent Their Spleen At Republicans. But Disagree With Liberals And Their First Response Is To Call You Gay. Liberals Are Gays' Biggest Champions On Issues Most Gays Couldn't Care Less About, Like Gay Marriage Or Taxpayer Funding Of Photos Of Men With Bullwhips Up Their Derrieres. But Who Has Done More To Out, Embarrass, And Destroy The Lives Of Gay Men Who Prefer To Keep Their Orientation Private Than Democrats? Who Is More Intolerant Of Gays In The Republican Party Than Gays In The Democratic Party?

We Need Somebody To Put Rat Poisoning In Justice Stevens' Creme Brulee. That's Just A Joke, For You In The Media.

Because Of The Industrialization Of Agriculture -- Using Massive Amounts Of Fossil Fuel -- Only 2 Percent Of Americans Work In Farming. And Yet They Produce Enough Food To Feed All 300 Million Americans, With Plenty Left Over For Export. When Are Liberals Going To Break The News To Their Friends In Darfur That They All Have To Starve To Death To Save The Planet?

Industrialization

Liberals Are More Upset When A Tree Is Chopped Down Than When A Child Is Aborted. Even If One Rates An Unborn Child Less Than A Full-blown Person, Doesn't The Unborn Child Rate Slightly Higher Than Vegetation?

For Decades Now, The Democrats Have Had A Good Gig Buying The Votes Of Government Workers With Outrageous Salaries, Benefits And Work Rules - And Then Sticking Productive Earners With The Bill. But, Now, We're Out Of Money.

Don't Make The Mistake, America, Of Voting For Barack Obama Who, By The Way, Does Not Come Out Of The American Black Experience And Everything White Americans Feel Guilty About. He's A Hawaiian Born In 1961.

When You Try To Figure Out What The Religious Right Is, It Ultimately Comes Down Either To One Man, Pat Robertson, Or Anyone Who Believes In A Higher Being And Wants Their Taxes Cut.

I'm Thinking Of Writing A Book On National Health Care. It Will Be 2,000 Pages, And You'll Have Two Hours To Read It.

As The Saying Goes: God Made Man And Woman; Colonel Colt Made Them Equal.

The Only Place Al Gore Conserves Energy These Days Is On The Treadmill. I Don't Want To Suggest That Al's Getting Big, But The Last Time I Saw Him On Tv I Thought, "that Reminds Me - We Have To Do Something About Saving The Polar Bears." Never Mind His Carbon Footprint - Have You Seen The Size Of Al Gore's Regular Footprint Lately? It's Almost As Deep As Janet Reno's.

Carbon Footprint

[alan] Dershowitz Has Also Offered To Defend Osama Bin Laden In Court, Saying It Would Be An Act Of High Patriotism. It's Kind Of Too Bad There Isn't Going To Be A Trial. Having Dershowitz Defend Him Could Be Osama's Only Shot At Not Being The Least Popular Person In The Courtroom.

Unfortunately, Proof Of A Jefferson-hemings Liaison Was As Fanciful As Professor Ellis' War Service.

Liberals Despise The Rule Of Law Because It Interferes With Their Ability To Rule By Mob. They Love To Portray Themselves As The Weak Taking On The Powerful. But It Is The Least Powerful Who Suffer The Most Once The Rule Of Law Is Gone.

All Democrats For The Last 30 Years Have Tried To Stimulate The Economy By Giving 'tax Cuts' To People Who Don't Pay Taxes.

The Only Sexism Involved In The Miers Nomination Is The Administration's Claim That Once They Decided They Wanted A Woman, Miers Was The Best They Could Do. Let Me Just Say, If The Top Male Lawyer In The Country Is John Roberts And The Top Female Lawyer Is Harriet Miers, We May As Well Stop Allowing Girls To Go To Law School.

We Don't Want Someone Who Will Get 98 Percent Of The Vote. We Want Someone Who Will Get 51 Percent Of The Vote.

In The Druidical Religion Of Liberalism, Not Separating Your Recyclables Is A Sin, But Abortion Is Just A Medical Procedure.

Liberal Soccer Moms Are Precisely As Likely To Receive Anthrax In The Mail As To Develop A Capacity For Linear Thinking.

That Is [liberalism's] Goal - To Destroy The Family... [liberals] Just Made Up This Gay Marriage Thing Gays Are Natural Conservatives.

Frankly, I'm Getting A Lot Of Great Publicity.

The "european Union" Happens To Be Composed Of People Who Hate Our Guts. It Is The Continent Where Moveon.org-style Lunatics Are The Friendly, Pro-american Types And The Rest Are Crazy Muslims.

Even If Evolution Were True, It Wouldn't Disprove God. God Has Performed More Spectacular Feats Than Evolution. It's Not Even A Daunting Challenge To A Belief In God. If You Want Something That Complicates A Belief In God, Try Coming To Terms With Michael Moore Being One Of God's Special Creatures.

My Hobby (politics) Has Become My Life. I Have The Greatest Life Imaginable. I Think I Have A Greater Life Than Anyone In The Universe, In Fact.

Marriage Is Under Attack From So Many Different Areas. There Should Be Benefits Associated With Married People. Life Is Unfair. Maybe You Won't Find The Right Person And You Won't End Up Getting Married. Oh, Well, Life Is Unfair. But Married People, Because Of Their Capacity To Have Children, Even If They're Not Going To End Up Having Children, Even If They're Unable To Bear Children, Marriage Is An Institution That Is Absolutely Central To Civilization.

Our Blacks Are Better Than Their's

The Counties With The Highest Per Capita Income Aren't Near New York City Or Los Angeles - They're In The Washington, D.c. Area - A One-company Town Where The Company Is The Government. The Three Counties With The Highest Incomes In The Entire Country Are All Suburbs Of Washington. Eleven Of The 25 Counties With The Highest Incomes Are Near Washington.

[liberals] Think They Can Pass A Law Eliminating Guns And Nuclear Weapons, But Teenagers Having Sex Is Completely Beyond Our Control.

We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity. We Weren't Punctilious About Locating And Punishing Only Hitler And His Top Officers. We Carpet-bombed German Cities; We Killed Civilians. That's War. And This Is War.

Liberals Could Not Be Less Interested In Democracy When It Came To Taking Out Saddam Hussein... Now A Loyal American Ally [mubarak] Comes Under Attack And They Are Burning For Democracy.

Liberals Don't Love Big Government Because They Think It's Efficient, Compassionate, Fair Or Even Remotely Useful. They Support Big Government Because They Are Guaranteed The Support Of Nearly Everyone Who Works For The Government.

So I Think All Gays Who Are Born Gay Are Overwhelming Conservative, Maybe Apolitical, And All Those Angry Gays, Causing Trouble For Everybody, I Don't Think They Were Born Gay. I Think They Are Just Angry At Their Fathers.

In Response To Skyrocketing Gas Prices, Liberals Say, Practically In Unison, 'we Can't Drill Our Way Out Of This Crisis.' What Does That Mean? This Is Like Telling A Starving Man, 'you Can't Eat Your Way Out Of Being Hungry!' 'you Can't Water Your Way Out Of Drought!' 'you Can't Sleep Your Way Out Of Tiredness!' 'you Can't Drink Yourself Out Of Dehydration!' Seriously, What Does It Mean? Finding More Oil Isn't Going To Increase The Supply Of Oil? It Is The Typical Democratic Strategy To Babble Meaningless Slogans, As If They Have A Plan. Their Plan Is: The Permanent Twilight Of The Human Race.

Faggot Isn't Offensive To Gays; It's Got Nothing To Do With Gays.

When We Were At Peace, Democrats Wanted To Raise Taxes. Now There's A War, So Democrats Want To Raise Taxes. When There Was A Surplus, Democrats Wanted To Raise Taxes. Now That There Is A Mild Recession, Democrats Want To Raise Taxes.

'moderate Republican' Is Simply How The Blabocracy Flatters Republicans Who Vote With The Democrats. If It Weren't So Conspicuous, The 'new York Times' Would Start Referring To 'nice Republicans' And 'mean Republicans'

The Only Question I'd Be Interested In Is What Books Other Celebrities Have Read Recently, Which Is Part Of My Campaign To Promote Reading.

Much Of The Left's Hate Speech Bears Greater Similarity To A Psychological Disorder Than To Standard Political Discourse. The Hatred Is Blinding, Producing Logical Contradictions That Would Be Impossible To Sustain Were It Not For The Central Element Faith Plays In The Left's New Religion. The Basic Tenet Of Their Faith Is This: Maybe They Were Wrong About Their Facts And Policies, But They Are Good And Conservatives Are Evil. You Almost Want To Give It To Them. It's All They Have Left.

Psychological Disorders

The Thing I Like About Bush Is I Think He Hates Liberals.

I Love To Engage In Repartee With People Who Are Stupider Than I Am.

We Have Way Too Many Lawyers, The Price For Them Has Plummeted And You Will Have A Miserable And Unsatisfying Life. Unless You Get Into Harvard Law. You Could Be In A Yurt On The Mongolian Plateau And They'll Say, "oh You Must Be Smart. You Went To Harvard Law."

Vietnam Is The Liberals' Favorite Was Because America Lost

Historically, The Best Way To Convert Liberals Is To Have Them Move Out Of Their Parents' Home, Get A Job, And Start Paying Taxes.

Obviously, I'm A Fan Of Satire. I'd Debate Anyone, But It Would Have To Be The Actual Person. That Would Be My Only Hesitation About Debating Stephen Colbert. If He Were Playing A Character, It Wouldn't Really Work.

Everything That Liberals Want They Call A Civil Right. This Avoids Them Having To Argue About It And Puts The Halo Around The Issue.

Either We're Removing A Dictator Who Currently Has Plans To Fund Terrorism Against American Citizens Or -- If Bush Is Completely Wrong And Eleanor Clift Is Completely Right -- We're Just Removing A Dictator Who Plans To Terrorize A Lot Of People In The Region, But Not Americans Specifically. Even For Someone Like Me, Who Doesn't Want America To Be The World's Policeman, The Risk Of Precipitous Action Against Saddam Hussein Doesn't Keep Me Up At Night.

The Most We Can Hope For Is Strong Marriages. Married Women Vote Republican; Single Women Vote Democratic.

I'm Not Going To Be Lectured To.

Instead Of 'counterrevolutionaries,' Liberals' Opponents Are Called 'haters,' 'those Who Seek To Divide Us,' 'tea Baggers,' And 'right-wing Hate Groups.' Meanwhile, Conservatives Call Liberals 'liberals'-and That Makes Them Testy.

We Need To Execute People Like (john Walker Lindh) In Order To Physically Intimidate Liberals.

If John Kerry Had A Dollar For Every Time He Bragged About Serving In Vietnam - Oh Wait, He Does.

It's Really Hard To Be A Black Republican. I See What They Go Through. It's A Good Little Trick The Entire Mainstream Media Has Pulled By Describing Republicans As "racist! Racist! Racist!" And Then Turning Around And Laughing At Us For Not Having More Blacks In Our Party.

So For Those Of You Who Haven't Read Any Of My Five Best-selling Books: Liberals Are Driven By Satan And Lie Constantly.

Government Workers Think The Job Of Everyone Else In The Economy Is To Protect Their High Salaries, Crazy Work Rules And Obscene Pensions. They Self-righteously Lecture Us About Public Service, The Children, A 'living Wage' All In The Service Of Squeezing More Money From The Taxpayer To Fund Their Breathtakingly Selfish Job Arrangements.

When Every One Of Your Arguments Is Characterized An Attempt To Bring Back Slavery Or Resegregate Lunch Counters, It's A Little Hard To Have Any Sort Of Productive Debate.

In The Corporeal World, International Law Is Whatever The United States And Great Britain Say It Is.

If Those Kids Had Been Carrying Guns They Would Have Gunned Down This One Gunman... Don't Pray. Learn To Use Guns.

It's Interesting How Obama's Adorers In The Press Keep Comparing Him To Lincoln And Reagan. Apparently They Can't Think Of A Democrat President Worthy Of Being Compared To.

I Cut Through The Nonsense With The Blinding Light Of Truth.

How Can Rogue Terrorists In Iraq Detonate Bombs? They're All Too Busy Flying Kites With Their Children! Hasn't [katrina Vanden Heuvel (queen Of The May At The Fun-loving Nation Magazine)] Seen Fahrenheit 9/11?

Weirdly Enough, The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Black People In The Last Twenty Or Thirty Years Was The O.j. Simpson Verdict Because It Shut Down The White Guilt Bank. And White Guilt Has Never Led To Anything Good. It's Brought Us Spiraling Crime Rates, Mostly With Black Victims, And A Permanent Underclass Living In Public Housing Projects. For Years, Liberals Cried That "law And Order" And "welfare Reform" Were Racist Code Words.

The Most Crazed Religious Fanatic Argues In More Calm And Reasoned Tones Than Liberals Responding To Statistics On Concealed-carry Permits.

The Portrayal Of Senator Joe Mccarthy As A Wild-eyed Demagogue Destroying Innocent Lives Is Sheer Liberal Hobgoblinism. Liberals Weren't Cowering In Fear During The Mccarthy Era. They Were Systematically Undermining The Nation's Ability To Defend Itself While Waging A Bellicose Campaign Of Lies To Blacken Mccarthy's Name. Everything You Think You Know About Mccarthy Is A Hegemonic Lie. Liberals Denounced Mccarthy Because They Were Afraid Of Getting Caught, So They Fought Back Like Animals To Hide Their Own Collaboration With A Regime As Evil As The Nazis.

My Favorite Founding Fathers, Christians Like John Adams, Were Absolutely Appalled By Slavery, And Did Not Own Slaves. I Think We're Going To Have To Call On God's Grace Not Only For Slavery, But For What We're Doing Now With Abortions.

When Contemplating College Liberals, You Really Regret Once Again That John Walker Is Not Getting The Death Penalty.we Need To Execute People Like John Walker In Order To Physically Intimidate Liberals, By Making Them Realize That They Can Be Killed Too. Otherwise They Will Turn Out To Be Outright Traitors.

A Married Woman, The Safest Place For Any Woman To Be Is At Home With Her Husband.

Where There's Smoke Around A Conservative, There Are Journalists Furiously Rubbing Two Sticks Together.

It's Impossible To Talk Without Labels. "dog" Is A Label, But That Doesn't Mean It's Meaningless, Nor Does It Mean There's No Difference In A Shih Tzu And A Doberman.

Clinton's Attempt To Socialize Healthcare Was The Second Most Disgusting Thing He Did In The Oval Office. I Can't Remember Was The First Thing Was.

Reagan Took An Approach To The Cold War Dramatically Different From Any Other Us President. To Wit, He Thought We Should Win. This Was A Fresh Concept. At The Time, It Was Widely Ridiculed As A Dangerous Alteration Of Us Policy. Only After It Worked Was Reagan's Dangerous Foreign Policy Recast As Merely A Continuation Of The Policies Of His Predecessors.

Like The Archers Of Agincourt, John O'neal And The 254 Swiftboat Veterans Took Down Their Own Haughty Frenchman.

The Idea Of A Bowed And Terrified Liberal Minority During Mccarthy's 'reign Of Terror' Is Poppycock. Then As Now, All Elite Opinion Was Against Mccarthy.

Fundamentalist Muslim Terrorists Kill Three Thousand Americans, But America Isn't Supposed To Respond, Because If We Respond, They'll Respond. We Always Hear About 'karmic Retributions' And The 'cycle Of Violence' Only After We've Been Hit.

Democrats Haven't Been This Upset About An American Engaging In Free Speech Since Juanita Broaddrick Opened Her Yap.

Usually The Nonsense Liberals Spout Is Kind Of Cute, But In Wartime Their Instinctive Idiocy Is Life-threatening.

It Confirms My Idea That You Also Need More Liberal Gun Laws. Guns Lead To A Polite Society, As We Like To Say In The United States. And I Think That All Of Western Canada Would Agree With Me.

Do Not Allow Democrats Anywhere Near Foreign Policy. Not Even To Keep Them Away From Domestic Policy. It's A Mistake To Ask Those Who Don't Even Like Democracy To Defend It.

In The Very Next Election, The American People Elected 63 New Republicans To The House Of Representatives - The Largest Sweep Of Congress For Any Party Since 1948. Even Liberal Massachusetts Elected A Republican Senator Solely Because Of His Vow To Vote Against Obamacare.

As The Titanic Losses Were Racking Up, Fannie Mae's Operators, Franklin Raines And Jamie Gorelick, Disguised The Catastrophe By Orchestrating A $5 Billion Accounting Fraud - All The While Continuing To Pressure Banks To Make Absurd, Politically Correct Loans And Denouncing Republicans As Enemies Of The Poor.

A Cruise Missile Is More Important Than Head Start.

Democrats Are Not Angry About 9/11. Sad, Maybe - Sad That It Didn't Happen On Clinton's Watch So His Legacy Would Be More Than A Semen Stain. But They're Not Angry.

Liberals Could Live Their Whole Lives Never Having To Hear An Actual Conservative Opinion Other Than The Idiotic Arguments Written For Conservative Characters On Aaron Sorkin's Little Teleplays.

I Don't Think I Have An Unkind Word For Any.except Muslims. I've Been Cross With Them Since 9/11 2001. I Can't Remember Why But It Was Something Bad.

In California, The Fabulously Rich Support The Poor With Government Jobs, Paid For By The Middle Class Which Is Now Living In Arizona.

Secretary Of Defense Donald Rumsfeld Said Any Assumption That The Us Would Not Use Force Against North Korea Would Be A Mistake. Such Bellicosity Frightens Liberals. The Left's Reaction To Nutty Despots Is: He Might Hit Me, So I'll Be Nice. Rumsfeld's Idea Is: He'll Hit Me? Maybe I'll Hit Him. The Beauty Of That Approach Cannot Be Denied.

Democrats Always Assure Us That Deterrence Will Work, But When The Time Comes To Deter, They're Against It.

In The History Of The Nation, There Has Never Been A Political Party So Ridiculous As Today's Democrats. It's As If All The Brain-damaged People In America Got Together And Formed A Voting Bloc.

One More Item For The Delusional Miss Grundys Still Obtusely Citing Reagan As Their Model Of “niceness”: As Governor Of California, Reagan Gave Student Protesters At Berkeley The Finger. Remember That Next Time You Ask Yourself: “what Would Reagan Do?” People Who Are Afraid Of Ideas Whitewash Reagan Like They Whitewash Jesus. Sorry To Break It To You, But The Reagan Era Did Not Consist Of Eight Years Of Reagan Joking About His Naps.

The Nonsense About President Obama Being A Muslim Has Got To Stop. I Rise To Defend Him From This Absurd Accusation By Pointing Out That He Is Obviously An Atheist.

I Think There Are More Transgendered In America Than There Are People Who Worry About The Comfort And Security Who Broke In Our Country Illegally, Who Are Living Here Illegally, Are Taking Jobs Illegally, How Quickly It Moves Doesn't Really Matter.

Before The New York Times Starts Running "portraits In Grief" Of Former Enron Employees, It's Worth Remembering That Even After The Collapse, Enron Stock Is Still Worth More Than The Entire Social Security "trust Fund."

For Years, Mount Holyoke Professor Joseph 'full Metal Jacket' Ellis Had Been Regaling Students, Interviewers And Friends With Gripping Stories Of His Service In Vietnam.

No Wonder You Guys Lost.

My Track Record Is Pretty Good On Predictions.

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