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Even If Evolution Were True, It Wouldn't Disprove God. God Has Performed More Spectacular Feats Than Evolution. It's Not Even A Daunting Challenge To A Belief In God. If You Want Something That Complicates A Belief In God, Try Coming To Terms With Michael Moore Being One Of God's Special Creatures.

-Ann Coulter

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Even If Evolution Were

Ann Coulter

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Even If Evolution Were True, It Wouldn't Disprove God. God Has Performed More Spectacular Feats Than Evolution. It's Not Even A Daunting Challenge To A Belief In God. If You Want Something That Complicates A Belief In God, Try Coming To Terms With Michael Moore Being One Of God's Special Creatures.

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They've Hit Us And We've Got To Hit Back Hard, And I'm Not Just Talking About The Terrorists.

Already Liberals Are Trying To Rewrite The History Of The Cold War To Remove Reagan From Its Core, To Make Him A Doddering B-movie Actor Who Happened To Be Standing There When The Soviet Union Imploded. They Have The Media, The Universities, The Textbooks. We Have Ourselves. We Are The Witnesses.

Conservatives Have A Problem With Women. For That Matter, All Men Do.

Republicans Have Reached Out So Much To Black Republicans Because It's Part Of Our Tradition. Blacks Have Been In This Nation Longer Than Most Other Americans With The Possible Exception Of White Anglo-saxon Protestant. The First Blacks In Congress And The First Black Governor Were All Republicans. It Was Republicans Who Fought The Civil War Over Slavery And Who Introduced The Civil Rights Legislation Over The Next Hundred Years.

It May Be Annoying, But The Rash Of Hijackings By Connecticut Wasp Girls Surely Explains The Time-consuming - But Still Somehow Completely Useless - Examination Of My Personal Effects. We All Have To Make Sacrifices For Airline Safety.

Yet, When Republicans Were Finally Able To Push Through Tough Policies On Crime And Welfare Which They'd Supported For Decades, They Were Magnificent Successes For The Entire Country, But Especially For Black People. Release Us, And Great Things Will Happen!

I Think Being Called A She-devil By A Trial Lawyer Is Meant As A Compliment.

I'm A Christian First, And A Mean-spirited, Bigoted Conservative Second, And Don't You Ever Forget It. You Know Who Else Was Kind Of "divisive" In Terms Of Challenging The Status Quo And The Powers-that-be Of His Day? Jesus Christ.

Most People In The Tea Party Are Nice, But That Hasn't Stopped Liberals From Hating Them.

I Don't Think We [the Usa] Need More Troops. I Think We Need To Be Less Worried About Civilian Casualties.

With The Terrible Earthquake And Resulting Tsunami That Have Devastated Japan, The Only Good News Is That Anyone Exposed To Excess Radiation From The Nuclear Power Plants Is Now Probably Much Less Likely To Get Cancer.

The Man Responsible For Keeping Americans Safe From Another Terrorist Attack On American Soil For Nearly Seven Years Now Will Go Down In History As One Of America's Greatest Presidents.

I Was Morose That The Era Of Barack Obama Has Returned Us To A Period Where Everything Is Racist, Everyone Is Walking On Eggshells, And You Get The Moral Preening From White Liberals Who Don't Actually Even Know Any Black People. But, Oh, Do They Love To Get On Their High Horses And Accuse Republicans Of Being Racist For Opposing Very Liberal Government Policies And A Very Liberal Democratic President. It's An Extension Of The Civil Rights Label Being Slapped On Gay Marriage And Abortion. Allow Me To Be Bi-partisan For A Moment, And Love This Moment Because It Won't Last Long.

Marriage Is Under Attack From So Many Different Areas. There Should Be Benefits Associated With Married People. Life Is Unfair. Maybe You Won't Find The Right Person And You Won't End Up Getting Married. Oh, Well, Life Is Unfair. But Married People, Because Of Their Capacity To Have Children, Even If They're Not Going To End Up Having Children, Even If They're Unable To Bear Children, Marriage Is An Institution That Is Absolutely Central To Civilization.

Government Workers Think The Job Of Everyone Else In The Economy Is To Protect Their High Salaries, Crazy Work Rules And Obscene Pensions. They Self-righteously Lecture Us About Public Service, The Children, A 'living Wage' All In The Service Of Squeezing More Money From The Taxpayer To Fund Their Breathtakingly Selfish Job Arrangements.

When We Were At Peace, Democrats Wanted To Raise Taxes. Now There's A War, So Democrats Want To Raise Taxes. When There Was A Surplus, Democrats Wanted To Raise Taxes. Now That There Is A Mild Recession, Democrats Want To Raise Taxes.

When Contemplating A Shield That Would Protect America For Incoming Missiles, Democrats Suddenly Became Hardheaded Fiscal Conservatives. For The First Time In Recorded History, Liberals Were Concerned About The Cost And Usefulness Of A Government Program. These People Believe Federally Funded Art Therapy For The Homeless Will Pay For Itself. That You Can Take To The Bank. But A Shield To Repel Incoming Nuclear Missiles From American Soil They Said, Was Too Expensive And Wouldn't Work.

Fittingly, In The Final Analysis, Clinton Will Not Be Remembered For What He Did As President, But For Who He Did.

Women Like Pamela Harriman And Patricia Duff Are Basically Anna Nicole Smith From The Waist Down. Let's Just Call It For What It Is. They're Whores.

Hussein Praised His Sons For Putting Up A Brave Fight, Noting That U.s. Forces Had Surrounded Their Compound With Advanced Weaponry, Ground Troops And Warplanes. In Case That Didn't Work, U.s. Forces Were Prepared To Tell Janet Reno That A Small Cuban Boy Was Inside The House.

In A Comprehensive Study Of All Public Multiple Shooting Incidents In America Between 1977 And 1999, Economists John Lott And Bill Landes Found That The Only Public Policy That Reduced Both The Incidence And Casualties Of Such Shootings Were Concealed-carry Laws. Not Only Are There 60 Percent Fewer Gun Massacres After States Adopt Concealed-carry Laws, But The Death And Injury Rate Of Such Rampages Are Reduced By 80 Percent.

Would That It Were So! ... That The American Military Were Targeting Journalists.

American Military

In The Spirit Of Reaching Across The Aisle, We Owe It To The Democrats To Show Their President The Exact Same Kind Of Respect And Loyalty That They Have Shown Our Recent Republican President.

If You Attack The Clintons Publicly, Make Sure All Your Friends Know That You Are Not Planning Suicide, That You're Not Careless When You Drive A Car.

If John Kerry Had A Dollar For Every Time He Bragged About Serving In Vietnam - Oh Wait, He Does.

Until You Can Intelligently Articulate The Other Side's Position, You Are Not An Adult. You Are A Liberal.

As The Titanic Losses Were Racking Up, Fannie Mae's Operators, Franklin Raines And Jamie Gorelick, Disguised The Catastrophe By Orchestrating A $5 Billion Accounting Fraud - All The While Continuing To Pressure Banks To Make Absurd, Politically Correct Loans And Denouncing Republicans As Enemies Of The Poor.

For Years, Mount Holyoke Professor Joseph 'full Metal Jacket' Ellis Had Been Regaling Students, Interviewers And Friends With Gripping Stories Of His Service In Vietnam.

...while A Sane World Would Not Employ 5-foot-tall Grandmothers As Law Enforcement Officers, A Sane World Would Also Not Give Full Body-cavity Searches To 5-foot-tall Grandmothers At Airports.

I'm More Of A Man Than Any Liberal.

There's Been Another Mass Shooting By A Crazy Person, And Liberals Still Refuse To Consider Institutionalizing The Dangerously Mentally Ill.

What Liberals Mean By 'goose-stepping' Or 'ethnic Cleansing' Is Generally Something Along The Lines Of 'eliminating Taxpayer Funding For The National Endowment For The Arts.' But They Can't Say That, Or People Would Realize They're Crazy.

I Think There Should Be A Literacy Test And A Poll Tax For People To Vote.

If The Press Really Thinks Obama Is Lincoln, They Ought To Treat Him Like They Treated Bush, 'cause That's How They Treated Lincoln. His Critics Compared Lincoln To An Ape; They Called Him An Illiterate Baboon.

Fundamentalist Muslim Terrorists Kill Three Thousand Americans, But America Isn't Supposed To Respond, Because If We Respond, They'll Respond. We Always Hear About 'karmic Retributions' And The 'cycle Of Violence' Only After We've Been Hit.

Ted Kennedy Says That Our Policy In Iraq Is Adrift. Hmmm. Maybe Like A Car Adrift In The Water After Its Has Gone Over A Bridge?

The Only Place Al Gore Conserves Energy These Days Is On The Treadmill. I Don't Want To Suggest That Al's Getting Big, But The Last Time I Saw Him On Tv I Thought, "that Reminds Me - We Have To Do Something About Saving The Polar Bears." Never Mind His Carbon Footprint - Have You Seen The Size Of Al Gore's Regular Footprint Lately? It's Almost As Deep As Janet Reno's.

Carbon Footprint

Liberal Soccer Moms Are Precisely As Likely To Receive Anthrax In The Mail As To Develop A Capacity For Linear Thinking.

As Far As I'm Concerned, I'm A Middle-of-the-road Moderate And The Rest Of You Are Crazy.

Liberals Become Indignant When You Question Their Patriotism, But Simultaneously Work Overtime To Give Terrorists A Cushion For The Next Attack And Laugh At Dumb Americans Who Love Their Country And Hate The Enemy.

If Any Other Religious Cult Knew So Few Basic Facts About Its Own Seminal Beliefs As The Liberal Cult Does About Joe Mccarthy, Janet Reno Would Gas Them.

We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity. We Weren't Punctilious About Locating And Punishing Only Hitler And His Top Officers. We Carpet-bombed German Cities; We Killed Civilians. That's War. And This Is War.

Looking At The Line-up Of Speakers At The (democratic National) Convention, I Have Developed The 7-11 Challenge: I Will Quit Making Fun Of, For Example, Dennis Kucinich, If He Can Prove He Can Run A 7-11 Properly For 8 Hours. We'll Even Let Him Have An Hour Or So Of Preparation Before We Open Up. Within 8 Hours, The Money Will Be Gone, The Store Will Be Empty, And He'll Be Explaining How Three 11-year Olds Came In And Asked For The Money And He Gave It To Them.

Liberals Don't Love Big Government Because They Think It's Efficient, Compassionate, Fair Or Even Remotely Useful. They Support Big Government Because They Are Guaranteed The Support Of Nearly Everyone Who Works For The Government.

[alan] Dershowitz Has Also Offered To Defend Osama Bin Laden In Court, Saying It Would Be An Act Of High Patriotism. It's Kind Of Too Bad There Isn't Going To Be A Trial. Having Dershowitz Defend Him Could Be Osama's Only Shot At Not Being The Least Popular Person In The Courtroom.

In The Druidical Religion Of Liberalism, Not Separating Your Recyclables Is A Sin, But Abortion Is Just A Medical Procedure.

We've Finally Given Liberals A War Against Fundamentalism, And They Don't Want To Fight It. They Would, Except It Would Put Them On The Same Side As The United States.

That Is [liberalism's] Goal - To Destroy The Family... [liberals] Just Made Up This Gay Marriage Thing Gays Are Natural Conservatives.

No Matter What Argument You Make Against Evolution, The Response Is Well, You Know, It's Possible To Believe In Evolution And Believe In God. Yes, And It's Possible To Believe In Spiderman And Believe In God, But That Doesn't Prove Spiderman Is True.

I Am Emboldened By My Looks To Say Things Republican Men Wouldn't.

When You Try To Figure Out What The Religious Right Is, It Ultimately Comes Down Either To One Man, Pat Robertson, Or Anyone Who Believes In A Higher Being And Wants Their Taxes Cut.

Not All Muslims May Be Terrorists, But All Terrorists Are Muslims.

I'm Getting A Little Fed Up With Hearing About, Oh, Civilian Casualties. I Think We Ought To Nuke North Korea Right Now Just To Give The Rest Of The World A Warning.

No Torture Has Yet Been Devised That Could Get A Liberal To Mention The Poor, Beleaguered Kurds Dancing In The Streets Because Saddam Is Gone.

This Is What Christians Consider Themselves: Perfected Jews.

We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity.

Ironically, Since Obama Was Elected, For The First Time In My Life I'm Sometimes Not Proud Of My Country.

The Klan Sees The World In Terms Of Race And Ethnicity. So Do Liberals

'moderate Republican' Is Simply How The Blabocracy Flatters Republicans Who Vote With The Democrats. If It Weren't So Conspicuous, The 'new York Times' Would Start Referring To 'nice Republicans' And 'mean Republicans'

Clinton's Attempt To Socialize Healthcare Was The Second Most Disgusting Thing He Did In The Oval Office. I Can't Remember Was The First Thing Was.

If Liberals Think Iraqis Are Genetically Incapable Of Pulling Off Even The Most Rudimentary Form Of Democracy, Why Do They Believe 50 Million Mexicans Will Magically Become Good Americans, Imbued In The Nation's History And Culture, Upon Crossing The Rio Grande? Maybe We Should Dunk Iraqis In The Rio And See What Happens.

That Is The Theme Of The Million Mom March: 'i Don't Need A Brain - I've Got A Womb'.

As Bush Said, After Detailing Some Of Saddam Hussein's Charming Practices: “if This Is Not Evil, Then Evil Has No Meaning.” It's Not As If Anyone Is Worried That We're Making A Horrible Miscalculation And Could Be Removing The Iraqi Abraham Lincoln By Mistake.

While The Form Of Treachery Varies Slightly From Case To Case, Liberals Always Manage To Take The Position That Most Undermines American Security.

If We're So Cruel To Minorities, Why Do They Keep Coming Here? Why Aren't They Sneaking Across The Mexican Border To Make Their Way To The Taliban?

Liberals Despise The Rule Of Law Because It Interferes With Their Ability To Rule By Mob. They Love To Portray Themselves As The Weak Taking On The Powerful. But It Is The Least Powerful Who Suffer The Most Once The Rule Of Law Is Gone.

When Contemplating College Liberals, You Really Regret Once Again That John Walker Is Not Getting The Death Penalty.we Need To Execute People Like John Walker In Order To Physically Intimidate Liberals, By Making Them Realize That They Can Be Killed Too. Otherwise They Will Turn Out To Be Outright Traitors.

I'm Thinking Of Writing A Book On National Health Care. It Will Be 2,000 Pages, And You'll Have Two Hours To Read It.

The Thing I Like About Bush Is I Think He Hates Liberals.

Being Anti-war In Hollywood Was An Act Of Bravery On The Order Of The Keynote Speaker At A Plo Dinner Making Jokes About Ariel Sharon.

That Is Obama's Signature Move: Invent People Who Are Saying Ridiculous Things And Then Encourage The Audience To Laugh At These Made-up Buffoons.

Liberals Are More Upset When A Tree Is Chopped Down Than When A Child Is Aborted. Even If One Rates An Unborn Child Less Than A Full-blown Person, Doesn't The Unborn Child Rate Slightly Higher Than Vegetation?

Do You Know What Christianity Is? We Believe Your Religion [judaism], But You [jews] Have To Obey.

All Democrats For The Last 30 Years Have Tried To Stimulate The Economy By Giving 'tax Cuts' To People Who Don't Pay Taxes.

Liberals Never, Ever Drop A Heinous Idea; They Just Change The Name. Abortion Becomes Choice, Communist Becomes Progressive, Communist Dictatorship Becomes People's Democratic Republic And Nikita Khrushchev Becomes Barack Obama.

Hillary Has Already Gotten A Record $8 Million Advance From Simon & Schuster For The Book -- Reportedly The Most Anyone Has Ever Received For Rewriting History.

Anyplace Market Forces Have Been Artificially Removed By The Government There Is A Total Absence Of Incentives, Competition, Effective Oversight, Cost Controls And So On.

There's Never A Recession If You Work For The Government.

To Promote The Sales Of Gm Vehicles, Obama Says The Government Will Stand By Your Gm Car Warranty. And All The Taxpayers Will Get A Lube Job.

The Fact That A Republican Is In The Late Senator Kennedy's Old Seat Probably Must Have Him Rolling In His Grave, Probably Spilling His Drink.

Yes, Of Course, Black Americans Are A Special Group, And I'm Disappointed That They're Not Republicans, Given Our Traditions. We're Not Getting Much Love In Return, Despite Our Efforts.

Democrats Always Assure Us That Deterrence Will Work, But When The Time Comes To Deter, They're Against It.

My Track Record Is Pretty Good On Predictions.

The Presumption Of Innocence Only Means You Don't Go Right To Jail.

Presumption Of Innocence

Instead Of Seeking Wisdom, Liberals Desire To Be Seen As Clever By Being Counterintuitive, Crazy, And Outre.

All Of These Riots Around The Globe Are Endangering The World. And Mobs Are Always Dangerous, Destructive Things That End Society. Liberal Policies Promote Mobs Because Liberals Crawl On The Mobs, The Destruction Wrought By The Mobs To Attain Power. Tere's Only One Way To React To A Mob To Save Civilized Society, And That Is To Smash The Mob. It Is Not To Mollycoddle The Mob.

Blacks Have A Special History, Since They Were Enslaved And Were Here As Early As The First Americans. I Hate To Sound Like A Liberal But These Are Facts. That Makes Blacks A Special Group.

I Support Guns And I Support The Death Penalty. Half Of My Interviews Are Convincing Liberals They're Not Liberal.

The Media Will Spend Weeks Going Through Pay Stubs For Bush's National Guard Service In Alabama In The Waning Days Of War, But If Kerry Tells Them Exotic Tales Of Covert Missions Into Cambodia Directed By Richard Nixon, They Don't Even Bother To Fact-check Who Was President In December 1968.

I Sort Of Feel Sorry For Gays Being The Last Ones At The Sexual Revolution Window. We've Had Liberalizing Rules On Divorce. We've Had The Sexual Revolution. We've Had, You Know, The Pill, And Burning Bras And Rampant Premarital Sex And Polymorphous Perversity.

Liberals Have Managed To Eliminate The Idea Of Manly Honor. Instead, All They Have Is Womanly Indignation.

Liberals Compare Jerry Falwell To The Taliban, But Then Are Furious With George Bush For Not Being Jesus Christ. Evidently, What A President Is Supposed To Do When The Girls Are Scared Is Develop Complete Omniscience And Omnipotence. Thus, The Media Repeatedly Expound Upon The Proposition That What Bush Should Have Done In Response To The Anthrax Mailings Is: Instantly Produce The Culprits And Put An End To This Madness!

Stem-cell Research On Embryos Is An Even Worse Excuse For The Slaughter Of Life Than Abortion. No Woman Is Even Being Spared An Inconvenience This Time.... It's Just Harvest And Slaughter, Harvest And Slaughter, Harvest And Slaughter.

When Minutemen Leader Jim Gilchrist And His Black Colleague Marvin Stewart Were Invited By The College Republicans To Speak At Columbia Last Year, The Tolerant, Free-speech-loving Columbia Students Violently Attacked Them, Shutting Down The Speech.

This Is The Way Addled Liberals Really Think. Even As They Champion Sucking The Brains Out Of Little Babies, They Think Of Themselves As Indelibly Compassionate Because They Favor An Overweening, Behemoth Federal Government.

Liberals Could Not Be Less Interested In Democracy When It Came To Taking Out Saddam Hussein... Now A Loyal American Ally [mubarak] Comes Under Attack And They Are Burning For Democracy.

I Think [whitewater]'s Going To Prevent The First Lady From Running For Senate.

College Campuses Have Become Fascist Colonies Of Anti-american Hate Speech, Hypersensitivity, Speech Codes, Banded Words And Prohibited Scientific Inquiry.

The Nonsense About President Obama Being A Muslim Has Got To Stop. I Rise To Defend Him From This Absurd Accusation By Pointing Out That He Is Obviously An Atheist.

I'm A Christian First, And A Mean-spirited, Bigoted Conservative Second, And Don't You Ever Forget It.

Because Of The Industrialization Of Agriculture -- Using Massive Amounts Of Fossil Fuel -- Only 2 Percent Of Americans Work In Farming. And Yet They Produce Enough Food To Feed All 300 Million Americans, With Plenty Left Over For Export. When Are Liberals Going To Break The News To Their Friends In Darfur That They All Have To Starve To Death To Save The Planet?

Industrialization

So Now It Turns Out That Thomas Jefferson Was Having Sex With Sally Hemings While Serving In The 101st Airborne During The Vietnam War.

We Didn't Raise This Issue, The Courts Raised It. The Courts Jammed It Down Our Throats, At The Risk Of Insulting Any Of My Gay Male Fans.

Liberals Are More Upset When A Tree Is Chopped Down Than When A Child Is Aborted.

There Were Precisely Two Groups Of People Who Desperately Wanted Airport Security To Be Browbeaten Into Giving Suspicious Passengers A Pass: Terrorists And Democrats.

Vietnam Is The Liberals' Favorite Was Because America Lost

I'm A Problem-solver, And You're Welcome.

Problem Solvers

In The Corporeal World, International Law Is Whatever The United States And Great Britain Say It Is.

Hollywood Liberals Could Not Be Reached For Comment On The Cost Of The Inauguration Because They Were Being Fitted For Gowns And Jewelry Worth Millions Of Dollars In Anticipation Of Oscar Night.

Between 1995 And 2005, The Prison Population Grew By 30 Percent, Meaning An Additional Half Million Criminals Were Behind Bars, Rather Than Lurking In Dark Alleys With Switchblades. You Can Well Imagine Liberals' Surprise When The Crime Rate Went Down As More Criminals Were Put In Prison. The New York Times Was Reduced To Running Querulous Articles With Headlines Like Number In Prison Grows Despite Crime Reduction And As Crime Rate Drops, The Prison Rate Rises And The Debate Rages.

As Long As American Liberals Are Going To Keep Announcing That They're Embarrassed For Their Country, How About Being Embarrassed By Our Public Schools Or By Our Ridiculous Trial Lawyer Culture That Other Countries Find Laughable?

If A University Official's Letter Accusing A Speaker Of Having A Proclivity To Commit Speech Crimes Before She's Given The Speech - Which Then Leads To Facebook Postings Demanding That Ann Coulter Be Hurt, A Massive Riot And A Police-ordered Cancellation Of The Speech - Is Not Hate Speech, Then There Is No Such Thing As Hate Speech.

I Wouldn't Know All That I Do About History, If I Spent My Time Watching Cartoons And Other Tv Shows.

The Afghan "negotiation Phase" Immediately Precedes The Traditional Afghan "surrender Phase." This Entails The Following: The Defeated Party Surrenders And Then Comes Out Shooting. This Is Repeated Several Times. Finally, The Vanquished Party Runs Out Of Ammunition And Is Forced To Surrender ' But Seriously This Time ' At Which Point The Victors Kill The Foreigners And Hug Their Fellow Afghans Like Long-lost Brothers.

I Think There Are More Transgendered In America Than There Are People Who Worry About The Comfort And Security Who Broke In Our Country Illegally, Who Are Living Here Illegally, Are Taking Jobs Illegally, How Quickly It Moves Doesn't Really Matter.

[m]ore Americans Work For Federal, State Or Local Government Than Work In Any Form Of Manufacturing. We Crossed That Rubicon About 10 Years Ago.

Liberals Have A Preternatural Gift For Striking A Position On The Side Of Treason...whenever The Nation Is Under Attack, From Within Or Without, Liberals Side With The Enemy.

Public School Teachers Are The New Priesthood While Traditional Religion Is Ridiculed And Maligned.

Walking Back From The Convention Site I Chatted With A Normal Bostonian For Several Blocks -- Who Must Have Identified Me Through Our Covert System Of Signals. He Was Mostly Bemused By The Democrats' Primetime Speakers And Told Me He Used To Be An Independent, But For The Last 20 Years Found Himself Voting Mostly Republican. Then He Corrected Himself And Said He Votes For The American.

It Was Not Lost On Osama Bin Laden That It Only Took 18 Dead In Somalia For The Great Satan To Pull Out. It Should Not Be Lost On Americans That This Is What The Democrats Are Again Demanding We Do In Iraq.

Osama Bin Laden

Four Years Of Jimmy Carter Gave Us Two Titanic Reagan Landslides, Peace And Prosperity For Eight Blessed Years - And Even A Third Term For His Feckless Vice President, George H.w. Bush.

Let's Say I Go Out Every Night, I Meet A Guy And Have Sex With Him. Good For Me. I'm Not Married.

Democrats Are Channeling Their Frustration With America's Imminent Military Victory In Afghanistan Into Hysterical Opposition To Reasonable National Security Measures At Home. (incidentally, This Ought To Prove Once And For All What A Bunch Of Paper Tigers The Russians Are. What Were They Doing Over There For 10 Years? It Hasn't Taken Us 10 Weeks.)

You Never Run Into A Fundamentalist Christian As Intolerant Of - Take Anything, You Know, Homosexuality As A Liberal Who Has Just Found A Lit Cigarette In A Nonsmoking Section.

Don't Make The Mistake, America, Of Voting For Barack Obama Who, By The Way, Does Not Come Out Of The American Black Experience And Everything White Americans Feel Guilty About. He's A Hawaiian Born In 1961.

At Least When Right-wingers Rant There's A Point.

I Highly Approve Of Romney's Decision To Be Kind And Gentle To The Retard.

I'd Pretty Much Debate Anybody. I Prefer To Debate Smart Liberals. I'm Not Saying This About Stephen Colbert But, Unfortunately, The Most Famous Liberals Generally Aren't The Smartest Ones. I Have A List Of The Smarter Liberals I Recommend.

Although God Believers Don't Need Evolution To Be False, Atheists Need Evolution To Be True.

Reagan Took An Approach To The Cold War Dramatically Different From Any Other Us President. To Wit, He Thought We Should Win. This Was A Fresh Concept. At The Time, It Was Widely Ridiculed As A Dangerous Alteration Of Us Policy. Only After It Worked Was Reagan's Dangerous Foreign Policy Recast As Merely A Continuation Of The Policies Of His Predecessors.

I Really Liked Deadheads And The Whole Dead Concert Scene: The Tailgating, The Tie-dye Uniforms, The Camaraderie It Was Like Nascar For Potheads.

If You Don't Hate Clinton And The People Who Labored To Keep Him In Office, You Don't Love Your Country.

The New York Times Editorial Page Is Like A Ouija Board That Has Only Three Answers, No Matter What The Question. The Answers Are: Higher Taxes, More Restrictions On Political Speech And Stricter Gun Control.

In Other Words, Under Attorney General John Ashcroft, The Fbi, The Ins And The Department Of Justice Are So Out Of Control That They Have Actually Begun To Enforce U.s. Immigration Laws.

Republicans Are Afraid To Act In Accordance With The Election Results. Republicans Seem To Be In Denial About Election Results. It's One Thing For Democrats To Be In Denial About The Republican Electoral Juggernaut, But It's Strange That Republicans Are In Denial About It Too.

Election Results

I've Never Seen People Enjoying Their Husbands' Deaths So Much

It Is A Law Of Nature That Everything Run By The Government Will Get More Expensive And Worse Over Time. Everything Run By The Private Sector Will Get Better And Cheaper Over Time. The Fact That [obamacare] Starts This Badly Does Not Bode Well....we Want Healthcare Run On The Same System That Gave Us Cell Phones, Flat Screens, Jerry Garcia Chia Pets. Everything You Submit To The Free Market...keeps Getting Better And Better.

Gore Said Foreigners Are Not Worried About 'what The Terrorist Networks Are Going To Do, But About What We're Going To Do.' Good. They Should Be Worried. They Hate Us? We Hate Them. Americans Don't Want To Make Islamic Fanatics Love Us. We Want To Make Them Die. There's Nothing Like Horrendous Physical Pain To Quell Anger. Japanese Kamikazes Pilots Hated Us Once, Too. A Couple Of Well-aimed Nuclear Weapons Got Their Attention. Now They Are Gentle Little Lambs.

This Is No Time To Be Precious About Locating The Exact Individuals Directly Involved In This Particular Terrorist Attack.... We Know Who The Homicidal Maniacs Are. They Are The Ones Cheering And Dancing Right Now. We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity.

The Idea Of A Bowed And Terrified Liberal Minority During Mccarthy's 'reign Of Terror' Is Poppycock. Then As Now, All Elite Opinion Was Against Mccarthy.

Invalidating Laws Has Absolutely Nothing To Do With Judicial Activism. It Depends On Whether The Law Is Unconstitutional Or Not. That's Really The Key Point.

By 1973, John Kerry Had Already Accused American Soldiers Of Committing War Crimes In Vietnam, Thrown Someone Else's Medals To The Ground In An Anti-war Demonstration, And Married His First Heiress.

In California, The Fabulously Rich Support The Poor With Government Jobs, Paid For By The Middle Class Which Is Now Living In Arizona.

Since Liberals Never Print Retractions, They Can Say Anything. What They Said In The Past Is Always Deemed Inadmissible And Unfair To Quote.

When Conservative Judges Strike Down Laws, It's Because Of What's In The Constitution. When Liberal Judges Strike Down Laws (or Impose New Laws), It's Because Of What's In The New York Times

Long Before There Was Discrimination Against Blacks, There Was Discrimination Against White Southerners. When Large Numbers Of These Country People Moved North During World War Ii, They Were Aggressively Excluded From Neighborhoods, Jobs, And Homes - Not Because Of Their Skin Color, But Their Accents.

[the Media's] Fantasy Of An America Bristling With Racists Allows Them To Portray Any Criticism Of Our Massively Incompetent And Dangerous President As Just Another Sad Episode Of Oh-so-typical White Racism.

Even Obama's Staunchest Supporters Are Starting To Leave Him. Last Week Michelle Obama Demanded To See A Copy Of His Birth Certificate.

Contempt Is The Emotion We Feel For An Opponent Whose Arguments Are Too Formidable To Refute.

When Your Party Is Controlled By A Billionaire Rootless International Financier Who Expresses 'no Sense Of Guilt' For Collaborating With The Nazis, You Might Want To Ease Up On Lecturing The Rest Of Us About The Evil Rich.

Liberals Don't Have To Emerge From The Hot Tub And Start Attending Nascar Races Or - God Forbid - Church, But It Would Be Nice If They'd Stop Lying All The Time.

There Is No Surer Proof Of Christ's Divinity Than That He Is Still So Hated Some Two Thousand Years After His Death.

Perhaps Like The Many And Various Meanings Of The Word "we," Liberals Use The Word "unsubstantiated" To Mean "tested Repeatedly And Proved True."

Britain Makes It Absolutely, Blindingly Clear That It Is Liberal Social Welfare Policies. And They Have Turned A Good Chunk Of Their Native Population Into Animals. They Are Absolute Animals. They Are Not Humans With Free Will. They Eat, They Screw, They Drink.

You Will Find Liberals Always Rooting For Savages Against Civilization.

The New York Times And The Rest Of The Mainstream Media Will Only Refer To Partial Birth Abortion As 'what Its Opponents Refer To As Partial Birth Abortions.' What Do Its Supporters Call It? Casual Fridays? Bean-with-bacon Potato Chip Dip? Uh . . . Steve?

The Only Beef Enron Employees Have With Top Management Is That Management Did Not Inform Employees Of The Collapse In Time To Allow Them To Get In On The Swindle. If Enron Executives Had Shouted, "head For The Hills!" The Employees Might Have Had Time To Sucker Other Americans Into Buying Wildly Over-inflated Enron Stock. Just Because Your Boss Is A Criminal Doesn't Make You A Hero.

Cbs Is Planning A Tribute To Dan Rather... The Memo Went Out A Month Ago But Everyone Assumed It Was A Fake.

You Don't Want The Republicans In Power, Does That Mean You Want A Dictatorship, Gay Boy?

Democrats Should Run Mahmoud Ahmadinejad For President. He's More Coherent Than Dennis Kucinich, He Dresses Like Their Base, He's More Macho Than John Edwards, And He's Willing To Show Up At A Forum Where He Might Get One Hostile Question - Unlike The Current Democratic Candidates For President Who Won't Debate On Fox News Channel. He's Not Married To An Impeached President, And The Name Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Is Surely No More Frightening Than B. Hussein Obama.

...sean Penn Claimed To Be 'serv[ing] The Country' By Giving Aid And Comfort To An Enemy About To Be Attacked By The Us. He Said It Made Him Feel More Patriotic To Dissent From The War Aims Of His Nation. It Is At Least A Counterintuitive Position. Most People Would Not Instantly Grasp How It Is More Patriotic To Always Root Against America. White Supremacists Should Try Claiming That Burning Crosses Is More Supportive Of Civil Rights Than Not Burning Them.

There Is A Growing Body Of Evidence That Radiation In Excess Of What The Government Says Are The Minimum Amounts We Should Be Exposed To Are Actually Good For You And Reduce Cases Of Cancer.

Historically, The Best Way To Convert Liberals Is To Have Them Move Out Of Their Parents' Home, Get A Job, And Start Paying Taxes.

Liberals Dispute That Reagan Won The Cold War On The Basis Of Their Capacity To Put Mocking Quotation Marks Around The Word, Won. That's Pretty Much The Full Argument: Restate A Factual Proposition With Sneering Quote Marks.

Quotation Marks

The Counties With The Highest Per Capita Income Aren't Near New York City Or Los Angeles - They're In The Washington, D.c. Area - A One-company Town Where The Company Is The Government. The Three Counties With The Highest Incomes In The Entire Country Are All Suburbs Of Washington. Eleven Of The 25 Counties With The Highest Incomes Are Near Washington.

Liberals Believe In Burning The American Flag, Urinating On Crucifixes, And Passing Out Birth Control Pills To 11-year-olds Without Telling Their Parents -- But God Forbid An Infidel Touch A Quran At Guantanamo.

If Those Kids Had Been Carrying Guns They Would Have Gunned Down This One Gunman... Don't Pray. Learn To Use Guns.

Harriet Miers Isn't Qualified To Play A Supreme Court Justice On The West Wing , Let Alone To Be A Real One.

The Only Subject Fewer Authentic Americans Cared About Than The Treatment Of Prisoners At Guantanamo Was World Cup Soccer. America Is An Epic Global Battle With Ruthless Savages Who Seek Our Destruction, And Liberals Are Feeling Sorry For The Terrorists.

There Is No More A 'political Middle' Than There Is A Family In America With 2.3 Children. People With Opinions Take Sides. Contrary To What You've Heard, It's Actually More Important To Stand For Something Than It Is For Everybody To 'just Get Along'.

It’s Often Said That Those Who Are Unduly Bothered By Gays Are Latent Homosexuals. Isn’t It Possible That People Obsessed With Racism Are Themselves Racist.

Whether They Are Defending The Soviet Union Or Bleating For Saddam Hussein, Liberals Are Always Against America. They Are Either Traitors Or Idiots, And On The Matter Of America's Self-preservation, The Difference Is Irrelevant.

Any Growing Interest In Soccer Can Only Be A Sign Of The Nation's Moral Decay.

So Far, The Only Major Accomplishment Of The Occupy Wall Street (ows) Protesters Is That They Have Finally Put An End To Their Previous Initiative, Occupy Our Mothers' Basements.

Before The New York Times Starts Running "portraits In Grief" Of Former Enron Employees, It's Worth Remembering That Even After The Collapse, Enron Stock Is Still Worth More Than The Entire Social Security "trust Fund."

Whenever You Come Across A Screw-up This Big, You Know The Government Is Behind It.

Why Is It That The Same People Who Have The Least Confidence In The Police And The Military Are The Most Willing To Allow Only The Police And The Military To Have Guns?

If Liberals Were Prevented From Ever Again Calling Republicans Dumb, They Would Be Robbed Of Half Their Arguments. To Be Sure, They Would Still Have Racist, Fascist, Homophobe, Ugly, And A Few Other Highly Nuanced Arguments In The Quiver. But The Loss Of Dumb Would Nearly Cripple Them.

I'm Not Going To Be Lectured To.

We Have Way Too Many Lawyers, The Price For Them Has Plummeted And You Will Have A Miserable And Unsatisfying Life. Unless You Get Into Harvard Law. You Could Be In A Yurt On The Mongolian Plateau And They'll Say, "oh You Must Be Smart. You Went To Harvard Law."

Anorexics Never Have Boyfriends. ... That's One Way To Know You Don't Have Anorexia, If You Have A Boyfriend.

Liberals Love To Strike Generous, Humanitarian Poses With Other People's Lives.

Liberals Are Hopping Mad Because Rush Limbaugh Referred To Phony Soldiers As "phony Soldiers." They Claim He Was Accusing All Democrats In The Military Of Being "phony." True, All Democrats In The Military Are Not Phony Soldiers, But All Phony Soldiers Seem To Be Democrats.

David Axelrod Says We Need To Inspire More Young People To Be Journalists? How About Inspiring Journalists To Be Journalists?

Liberals Are Stalwart Defenders Of Civil Liberties - Provided We're Only Talking About Criminals.

If Americans Loved Judicial Activism, Liberals Wouldn't Be Lying About What It Is. Judicial Activism Means Making Up Constitutional Rights In Order To Strike Down Laws The Justices Don't Like Based On Their Personal Preferences. It's Not Judicial Activism To Strike Down Laws Because They Violate The Constitution.

Moore's Only Concession To The Democrats' Role-playing Is To Deny That He Is A Democrat, Hoping Enough Americans Were Taught By Public School Teachers That No One Will Know How To Look Up Moore's Voter Registration Card. Democrat.

With Albright At The Helm Of The State Department, Osama Bin Laden Ran Wild Throughout The Middle East, The North Koreans Began Feverishly Building Nukes Under Her Nose, And We Staged A Pre-emptive Attack Solely For Purposes Of Regime Change Based On False Information Presented To The American People By Albright About A World Leader Who Was Not An Imminent Threat To The United States. Slobodan Milosevic Wasn't Even A Latent, Long-term, Hypothetical Threat.

The Left’s Idea Of “science” Is That We Should All Be Riding Bicycles And Using The Clivus Multrum Composting Latrines Instead Of Flush Toilets. Anyone Who Dissents, They Say — While Adjusting Their Healing Crystals For Emphasis — Is “afraid Of Science.”

I Would Like Evolution To Join The Roster Of Other Discredited Religions...

Liberals Claim To Love Gays When It Allows Them To Vent Their Spleen At Republicans. But Disagree With Liberals And Their First Response Is To Call You Gay. Liberals Are Gays' Biggest Champions On Issues Most Gays Couldn't Care Less About, Like Gay Marriage Or Taxpayer Funding Of Photos Of Men With Bullwhips Up Their Derrieres. But Who Has Done More To Out, Embarrass, And Destroy The Lives Of Gay Men Who Prefer To Keep Their Orientation Private Than Democrats? Who Is More Intolerant Of Gays In The Republican Party Than Gays In The Democratic Party?

The Democrats Pretended To Care About Black People For About Five Minutes To Help Their Electoral Process, And Then Civil Rights Suddenly Became Abortion On Demand, Gay Marriage, Rights For The Homeless, Etc.

Democrats See Our Voluntary Military Supported By Taxpayer Dollars As Their Personal Salvation Army. Self-interested Behavior, Such As Deploying Troops To Serve The Nation, Is Considered Boorish In Manhattan Salons.

Liberals Don't Care. Their Approach Is To Rip Out Society's Foundations Without Asking If They Serve Any Purpose. Why Do We Have Immigration Laws? What's With These Borders? Why Do We Have The Institution Of Marriage, Anyway? What Do We Need Standardized Tests For? Hey, I Like Keith Richards - Why Not Make Heroin Legal? Let's Take A Sledgehammer To All These Load-bearing Walls And Just See What Happens!

I Never Sought To Be A Pundit, Or On Tv, Or A Writer-it Just Kind Of Came To Me. If You Just Keep Doing What You Want To Do, You Wind Up Doing Precisely What You Want To Be Doing. Don't Resist How Life Bats You Around.

Doing What You Want

We're Bombarded With Liberal Propaganda 24/7, From The Early Morning Shows, Hollywood Movies, Documentaries And Sitcoms, All Major Newspapers, Fashion Magazines, The Sports Pages, Public Schools, College Professors And Administrators, Etcetera, Etcetera, Etcetera. Unless Liberals Specifically Seek Out Ann Coulter Books And Columns, Which I Highly Recommend, Or Tune Into Fox News Or Conservative Talk Radio, They Have No Idea What Conservatives Are Thinking.

I Have To Say I'm All For Public Flogging. One Type Of Criminal That A Public Humiliation Might Work Particularly Well With Are The Juvenile Delinquents, A Lot Of Whom Consider It A Badge Of Honor To Be Sent To Juvenile Detention. And It Might Not Be Such A Cool Thing In The 'hood To Be Flogged Publicly.

Democrats All Claim They'll Get Rough With The Terrorists, But They Can't Even Face Brit Hume.

My Favorite Founding Fathers, Christians Like John Adams, Were Absolutely Appalled By Slavery, And Did Not Own Slaves. I Think We're Going To Have To Call On God's Grace Not Only For Slavery, But For What We're Doing Now With Abortions.

Lawyers Tend To Be Bright People. They Tend To Be-much More Than Many Journalists I've Encountered-sticklers For Detail And Accuracy, And They Have A Logical Way Of Arguing.

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