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Women Need To Take Charge Of Their Lives And Be As Dynamic And Active As They Can Be. I Know That Some People Feel That There's A Negative Connotation To The Notion Of Feminism Like It Has Some Hidden And Ugly Undercurrent. But That's Ridiculous. My Mother Was A Feminist And She Was Very Politically-minded And Always Anxious To Defend Women's Rights And Advance A Lot Of Social Issues For Women.

-Amy Poehler

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Women Need To Take

Amy Poehler

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Women Need To Take Charge Of Their Lives And Be As Dynamic And Active As They Can Be. I Know That Some People Feel That There's A Negative Connotation To The Notion Of Feminism Like It Has Some Hidden And Ugly Undercurrent. But That's Ridiculous. My Mother Was A Feminist And She Was Very Politically-minded And Always Anxious To Defend Women's Rights And Advance A Lot Of Social Issues For Women.

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I Want Girls To Feel That They Can Be Sassy And Full And Weird And Geeky And Smart And Independent, And Not So Withered And Shriveled. (the American Apparel Ads) I'm Over This Weird, Exhausted Girl. I'm Over The Girl That's Tired And Freezing And Hungry. I Like Bossy Girls. I Like People Filled With Life. I'm Over This Weird Media Thing With All This, Like, Hollow-eyed, Empty, Party Crap.

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I Want To Be Around People That Do Things. I Don't Want To Be Around People Anymore That Judge Or Talk About What People Do. I Want To Be Around People Who Dream And Support And Do Things.

The French Have Launched Their Own Version Of Google, Called Quaero. You Just Type In The Subject You're Interested In, And Quaero Refuses To Look It Up For You.

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I'd Say Any Good Set Or Any Comedy That I've Worked On, That's Worked, Has Been Comedians Pitching Ideas Back And Forth To Each Other. A Lot Of Like, 'what If You Say This? What About This?'

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Masters Of Sex Is The Degree I Got From Boston College.

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Fighting Aging Is Like The War On Drugs. It's Expensive, Does More Harm Than Good, And Has Been Proven To Never End.

Well People Love To Go Dirty And Stuff Like That. It's Funny, Because Even Really Dirty Things Can Kind Of Inspire, But All Things Inspire Really Dirty Improv And Monologues. So Then Really Dirty Things Can Inspire The Exact Opposite. It's Kind Of A Crapshoot.

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Funny Inspirational

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The Truth Is, Writing Is This: Hard And Boring And Occasionally Great But Usually Not.

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I Get A Little Itchy If I Don't Have Some Control.

Sometimes You Need To Know To Quit While You're Ahead Or At Least Before Things Get Much Worse!

Make No A Complete Sentence.

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When You're Doing Sketch Comedy And You're Pregnant, It's Like Wearing A Giant Sombrero In Every Sketch.

We May All Host Ourselves To Death, And If We're All Dead Who Will Host Our Funerals?

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You Become More Attractive When You Love Yourself. You Attract The Right Things When You Have A Sense Of Who You Are.

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I Really Do Believe That Anything In Life - Any Obstacle Or Challenge - Can Be Made Better With Humor.

If You Can Surf Your Life Rather Than Plant Your Feet, You Will Be Happier.

Only At The Golden Globes Do The Beautiful People Of Film Rub Shoulders With The Rat-faced People In Television.

Forgiveness Is Something That's Always Possibility.

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I Don’t Really Believe In Cars, But I Drive One Every Day And I Love That It Gets Me Places And Makes Life So Much Easier And Faster And I Don’t Know What I Would Do Without It.

Rooting For Other People's Failure Does Get In The Way Of Your Success.

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Sticking Up For Ourselves In The Same Way We Would One Of Our Friends Is A Hard But Satisfying Thing To Do. Sometimes It Works.

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Creativity Is Connected To Passion - That Light Inside That Drives You.

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Try Putting Your Iphones Down Every Once In A While And Look At People's Faces.

Funny Graduation

When In Doubt, Make Funny Faces.

Any Actor Or Actress That Tells You That They Don't Watch Their Stuff Is Lying.

When You Feel Scared, Hold Someone's Hand And Look Into Their Eyes. And When You Feel Brave, Do The Same Thing. You Are All Here Because You Are Smart. And You Are Brave. And If You Add Kindness And The Ability To Change A Tire, You Almost Make Up The Perfect Person.

I Also Think If You're An Actor And You Can Improvise, When You Go On An Audition And You Can Improvise You're Just A Genius. If You Can, You Know, Take A Tide Commercial And You Can Just Say One Funny Line That's Not In The Commercial They Think You're A Genius.

I'm Going To Do 'the Social Network Two: The Electric Boogaloo.' And I Have A Part In 'beige Swan.' I'm Going To Be The Lead, But I Don't Dance. I Just Do A Lot Of Sitting Down. It's Too Tiring To Get Up And Dance Around. That Should Be Coming Out In 20-never.

I Like The Person Who Commits And Goes All In And Takes Big Swings And Then Maybe Fails Or Looks Stupid; Who Jumps And Falls Down, Rather Than The Person Who Points At The Person Who Fell, And Laughs.

President Bush On Monday Defended U.s. Interrogation Of Terrorists, Saying 'we Do Not Torture.' He Added, 'we Freedom Electrocute.'

The Pressure Of 'what Are You Going To Do?' Makes Everyone Feel Like They Haven't Done Anything Yet.

Try To Keep Your Mind Open To Possibilities And Your Mouth Closed On Matters That You Don't Know About. Limit Your 'always' And Your 'nevers.'

Your Career And Your Passion Don't Always Match Up. Plenty Of Talented People Don't Have The Careers They Want. Plenty Of Untalented People Make Millions And Make Movies. There Is A Difference Between Determination And Talent.

Don't Think. Get Out Of Your Head. Stop Planning And Just Go.

However, If You Do Start Crying In An Argument And Someone Asks Why, You Can Always Say, 'i'm Just Crying Because Of How Wrong You Are.'

Dreams Never Wear You Down.

You Have To Care About How Good You Are And How Good You Feel, But Not About How Good People Think You Are Or How Good People Think You Look.

I Cannot Stress Enough That The Answer To Life's Questions Is Often In People's Faces. Try Putting Your Iphones Down Once In A While, And Look In People's Faces. People's Faces Will Tell You Amazing Things. Like If They Are Angry, Or Nauseous Or Asleep.

The Great Thing About Taking Big Chances When You're Younger Is You Have Less To Lose, And You Don't Know As Much. So You Take Big Swings.

Funny Inspirational

I Ate Two Waffles, A Banana And Cereal With Blueberries. And That Whas Between My Two Breakfasts.

If You Are Lucky, There Is A Moment In Your Life When You Have Some Say As To What Your Currency Is Going To Be. I Decided Early On It Was Not Going To Be My Looks.

Whenever I Read Stories Of People Doing Huge Pranks On Set, All I Think Is, 'these People Have Too Much Time On Their Hands.' Besides, I Don't Want To Make Some Poor Assistant Clean Up Someone's Trailer After I've Filled It With, Say, Cadbury Eggs. See? I Can't Even Think Of A Good Prank.

Some People Get In The Way Of Change Happening. Some People Spend Their Whole Careers Thinking They Can Make A Difference. Other People Want To Do As Little As Possible To Get The Day Done.

Going From Crying To Laughing That Fast And Hard Happens Maybe Five Times In Your Life And That Extreme Right Turn Is The Reason Why We Are Alive, And I Believe It Extends Our Life By Many Years.

I Believe Great People Do Things Before They Are Ready.

I Would Love To Do A Serious Period Drama. Oh, Absolutely. I Mean, You'll Find Most Comedians Want To Do More Serious Stuff, Most Musicians Want To Be Comedians, And Most Serious Actors Want To Be Musicians.

When Your Children Arrive, The Best You Can Hope For Is That They Break Open Everything About You. Your Mind Floods With Oxygen. Your Heart Becomes A Room With Wide-open Windows. You Laugh Hard Every Day.

Doing What You're Afraid Of, Getting Out Of Your Comfort Zone, Taking Risks Like That- That's What Life Is.

If Your Career Is A Bad Boyfriend, It Is Healthy To Remember You Can Always Leave And Go Sleep With Somebody Else.

Because Of Various Security Lapses, Some Senators Are Calling For A Probe Of The Security At The Offices Of The Department Of Homeland Security. The Investigation Will Be Conducted By The Department Of Irony.

Any Time You Talk To Anyone About Something That They Love, They're, Like, Their Most Beautiful. It's A Cool Gift To Get To Talk To People About What They Love.

The Only Thing We Can Depend On In Life Is That Everything Changes. The Seasons, Our Partners, What We Want And Need. We Hold Hands With Out High School Friends And Swear To Never Lose Touch, And Then We Do.change Is The Only Constant. Your Ability To Navigate And Tolerate Change And Its Painful Uncomfortableness Directly Correlates To Your Happiness And General Well-being.

Creativity Is Connected To Your Passion, That Light Inside You That Drives You. . . . Your Creativity Is Not A Bad Boyfriend. It Is A Really Warm Older Hispanic Lady Who Has A Beautiful Laugh And Loves To Hug.

I Think We Should Stop Asking People In Their Twenties What They 'want To Do' And Start Asking Them What They Don't Want To Do.

Shame Makes People Abandon Their Children And Drink Themselves To Death. It Also Keeps Us From True Happiness. An Apology Is A Glorious Release.

I Have Realized That Mystery Is What Keeps People Away, And I've Grown Tired Of Smoke And Mirrors. I Yearn For The Clean, Well-lighted Place. So Let's Peek Behind The Curtain And Hail The Others Like Us. The Open-faced Sandwiches Who Take Risks And Live Big And Smile With All Of Their Teeth. These Are The People I Want To Be Around. This Is The Honest Way I Want To Live And Love And Write.

When You Host A Show You Have To Hopefully Be Funny At The Top And Set The Tone For A Really Fun Evening.

Talented Men Are Not Threatened By Talented Women. They Welcome Them. And Same Way With Real Men.

Sleep And I Do Not Have A Good Relationship. We Have Never Been Good Friends. I Am Constantly Chasing Sleep And Then Pushing It Away. A Good Night's Sleep Is My White Whale. Like Ahab, I Am Also A Total Drama Queen About It. I Love To Talk About How Little Sleep I Get. I Brag About It, As If It Is A True Indication Of How Hard I Work.

If The Goal Is Doing Good Stuff And Working With Your Friends ... If You’re Doing That Then You’re Succeeding.

You Aren't Allowed To Feel Special, But No One Knows The Specific Ways You Are In Pain.

I Am A Firm Believer That Every Few Years One Needs To Shake One's Life Through A Sieve, Like A Miner In The Yukon. The Gold Nuggets Remain. The Rest Falls Through Like The Soft Earth It Is.

Be Easy On Yourself. Have Fun. Only Hang Around People That Are Positive And Make You Feel Good. Anybody Who Doesn't Make You Feel Good, Kick Them To The Curb. And The Earlier You Start In Your Life The Better. The Minute Anybody Makes You Feel Weird And Non-included Or Not Supported, You Know, Either Beat It Or Tell Them To Beat It.

I've Said This Before, That, When You're In School And You're The Class Clown, Men Are Really Good At Making Fun At Other People And Women Are Really Good At Making Fun Of Themselves.

I Really Liked The Idea Of Playing That Kind Of Optimistic, Super-intense, Go-get-'em Spirit Combined With Being A Little Bit Of An Outsider. I Am Really Drawn To Girls Of That Age In General, Who Believe They Can Be A Waitress, Scientist, Actress, A Dentist, A Zookeeper...and Who Really Aren't Boy-crazy.

Great People Do Things Before They’re Ready. They Do Things Before They Know They Can Do It.

Believe Me, Blond Hair Can Take You Really Far, Especially With The Older Men. It Can Really Distract From The Face. I Am Convinced I Could Have Had Sex With Both Tony Bennett And John Mccain If We Weren't Each Happily Married At The Time We All Met.

My Phone Is Trying To Kill Me. It Is A Battery-charged Rectangle Of Disappointment And Possibility. It Is A Technological Pacifier.

I Like Bossy Girls. I Always Have. I Like People Filled With Life.

Change Is The Only Constant. Learn To Surf Your Life Instead Of Planting Your Feet.

Open-faced Sandwiches Take Risks And Live Big And Smile With All Their Teeth. These Are The People I Want To Be Around.

Find A Group Of People Who Challenge And Inspire You, Spend A Lot Of Time With Them, And It Will Change Your Life.

There's Only, Like, Five Perfectly Symmetrical People In The World, And They're All Movie Stars, And They Should Be, Because Their Faces Are Very Pleasing To Look At, But The Rest Of Us Are Just A Jangle Of Stuff, And The Earlier You Learn That You Should Focus On What You Have And Not Obsess About What You Don't Have, The Happier You Will Be.

I Have A Boyfriend Who Knows How To Settle Me. He Puts His Hand On My Chest And Tells Me Boring Stories. On One Of Our First Nights Together I Woke Up Apologizing For My Snoring And He Pulled Out Two Earplugs He Had Worn To Bed So He Could Hear What I Was Saying.

A Top Mccain Policy Adviser Claimed This Week That Mccain's Work In The Senate Helped Create The Blackberry, Saying, 'you're Looking At The Miracle That John Mccain Helped Create.' He Then Handed The Blackberry To Mccain, Who Attempted To Withdraw $20 From It.

Most Of The Women In Your Life Will Outlast The Men In Your Life. The Saturday Night Live Ladies - Maya Rudolph, Rachel Dratch, Tina - And I Text Pictures Of Our Kids Back And Forth All The Time. It Keeps Us Connected. As My Nanny Used To Say, The Older You Get, The More Important It Is To Know People That Knew You When.

It Likes It When You Don’t Depend On It. It Will Reward You Every Time You Don’t Act Needy. It Will Chase You If You Act Like Other Things (passion, Friendship, Family, Longevity) Are More Important To You. If Your Career Is A Bad Boyfriend, It Is Healthy To Remember You Can Always Leave And Go Sleep With Somebody Else.

Reading Was A Way To Make Friends Or Enemies, A Way To Discover How All These Different People Exist In The World And To Rub Shoulders With Them. The Ability To Feel As If You Have Met Someone, As If That Person Exists In Flesh And Blood And That You Relate To Them Somehow, Makes You Feel A Lot Less Lonely. And It Also Makes You Feel Very Brave.

I've Grown Tired Of Smoke And Mirrors. I Yearn For The Clean, Well-lighted Place.

It’s Never Overreacting To Ask For What You Want And Need.

In The Wake Of Newly-alleged Prisoner Abuse This Week, Senator John Mccain Said That Continued Mistreatment Of Iraqi Prisoners Is Hurting The Nation's Image. Also Hurting The Nation's Image: Letting People Drown When It Rains.

When I Had A Job Catering, I Catered A Wedding For The Smashing Pumpkins Bassist In Indiana. And I Served Billy Corgan Shrimp Off A Tray.

When You Do Talk About Yourself, Or To Yourself... Try To Picture You Talking To Your Own Daughter, Or Your Younger Sister. Because You Would Tell Your Younger Sister Or Your Daughter That She Is Beautiful, And You Wouldn't Be Lying. Because She Is. And So Are You.

There's Something So Romantic About Being Broke In New York. You Gotta Do It. You Have To Live There Once Without Any Money, And Then You Have To Live There When You Have Money. Let Me Tell You, Of The Two, The Latter Is Far Better.

Everyone Needs Love, Never Hurt A Living Thing [and] Don’t Worry About The Choices You Make Because Everything Will Be Fun Because Life Is A Closet Filled With Pool Toys.

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