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Is There Any Other Way To Erudite Headquarters?" I Say. "not That I Now Of," Says Cara. "unless You Want To Jump From One Roof To Another." She Laughs A Little As She Says It, Like It's A Joke. I Raise My Eyebrows At Her. "wait," She Says. "you Aren't Considering---?

-Veronica Roth

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Is There Any Other

Veronica Roth

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Is There Any Other Way To Erudite Headquarters?" I Say. "not That I Now Of," Says Cara. "unless You Want To Jump From One Roof To Another." She Laughs A Little As She Says It, Like It's A Joke. I Raise My Eyebrows At Her. "wait," She Says. "you Aren't Considering---?

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He Pushes His Hair, Soaked From The Snow, Out Of His Eyes. "so What Are We Going To Do, Break A Window? Look For A Back Door?" "i'm Just Going To Walk In," I Say. "i'm Her Son." "you Also Betrayed Her And Left The City When She Forbade Anyone From Doing That," He Says, "and She Sent People After You To Stop You. People With Guns." "you Can Stay Here If You Want," I Say. "where The Serum Goes, I Go," He Says. "but If You Get Shot At, I'm Going To Grab It And Run." "i Don't Expect Anything More." He Is A Strange Sort Of Person.

There Is A Reason You Don’t Know All The Things I Know. -marcus Eaton

I Have Your Back. I Didn't Mean Only When It's Easy. All The Time.

Tris," He Says. "what Did They Do To You? You're Acting Like A Lunatic." "that's Not Very Nice Of You To Say," I Say. "they Put Me In A Good Mood, That's All. And Now I Really Want To Kiss You, So If You Could Just Relax-

There Is Power In Controlling Something That Can Do So Much Damage - In Controlling Something, Period.

Every Tattoo I Got With Them Is A Mark Of Their Friendship, And Almost Every Time I Have Laughed In This Dark Place Was Because Of Them. I Don’t Want To Lose Them. But I Feel Like I Have Already.

What Is It With You Today?” Says Christina On The Way To Breakfast. Her Eyes Are Still Swollen From Sleep And Her Tangled Hair Forms A Fuzzy Halo Around Her Face. “oh, You Know,” I Say. “sun Shining. Birds Chirping.” She Raises An Eyebrow At Me, As If Reminding Me That We Are In An Underground Tunnel.

Let's Just Hug Already," He Says. Keeping One Hand Firm On Caleb's Arm, I Wrapped My Free Arm Around Zeke, And He Does The Same. When We Break Apart, I Pull Caleb Down The Alley, And Can't Resist Calling Back, "i'll Miss You." "you Too, Sweetie!" He Grins, And His Teeth Are White In The Twilight. They Are The Last Thing I See Of Him Before I Have To Turn And Set Out At A Trot For The Train.

Killing You Is Not The Worst Thing They Can Do To You," I Say. "controlling You Is.

You Need To Be Passionate About The Creative Work That You're Doing, But You Need To Be Kind Of Emotionally Separated From How People React To It Or How It Does. Those Things Should Be Secondary, And Primary Should Be Your Love Of The Creative Act.

Chaos And Destruction Do Tend To Take Away A Person's Dating Possibilities.

I Feel Like Someone Is Pressing Me Into A Mold That Does Not Fit My Body, Forcing Me Intothe Wrong Shape.

You Look Older.” “yes, Well. The Passage Of Time Tends To Do That To A Person.

Passage Of Time

Thank You For Your Honesty.

But When You Kill Someone You Love, The Hard Part Is Never Over. It Just Gets Easier To Distract Yourself From What You've Done.

Someone You Love

Come On,'he Says.' I Have Something Else To Show You.

Tobias And Tris

I've Done Without Doing Things, Like Sleeping And Eating, But I Need To Write.

You Think My First Instinct Is To Protect You. Because You're Small, Or A Girl, Or A Stiff. But You're Wrong." He Leans His Face Close To Mine And Wraps His Fingers Around My Chin. His Hand Smells Like Metal. When Was The Last Time He Held A Gun, Or A Knife? My Skin Tingles At The Point Of Contact, Like He's Transmitting Electricity Through His Skin. "my First Instinct Is To Push You Until You Break, Just To See How Hard I Have To Press." He Says, His Fingers Squeezing At The Word Break. My Body Tenses At The Edge In His Voice, So I Am Coiled As Tight As A Spring, And I Forget To Breathe.

I Have Done Bad Things. I Can't Take Them Back, And They Are Part Of Who I Am. Most Of The Time, They Seem Like The Only Thing I Am.

What?" I Ask. "i'm Developing A Theory." "and It Is?" She Picks Up Her Hamburger, Grins, And Says, "that You Have A Death Wish.

I Like To Think I'm Helping Them By Hating Them. I'm Reminding Them That They Aren't God's Gift To Humankind.

I Close My Eyes. I Don't Expect Four To Reassure Me, And He Makes No Effort To, But I Feel Better Standing Here Than I Did Out There Among The People Who Are My Friends, My Faction.

"what Did You Do?" I Scream. "you Die, I Die Too."

I Love You," I Say. I Said That Once, Before I Went To Erudite Headquarters, But He Was Asleep Then. I Don't Know Why I Didn't Say It When He Could Hear It. Maybe I Was Afraid To Trust Him With Something So Personal As My Devotion. Or Afraid That I Did Not Know What It Was To Love Someone. But Now I Think The Scary Thing Was Not Saying It Before It Was Too Late. Not Saying It Before It Was Almost Too Late For Me.

I Love You." He Frowns. "say It Again." "tobias," I Say. "i Love You.

You're The One Who Has To Live With Your Choice, Everyone Else Will Get Over It, Move On, No Matter What You Decide. But You Never Will

When Her Body First Hit The Net, All I Registered Was A Gray Blur. I Pulled Her Across It And Her Hand Was Small, But Warm, And Then She Stood Before Me, Short And Thin And Plain And In All Ways Unremarkable- Except That She Had Jumped First. The Stiff Had Jumped First. Even I Didn't Jump First. Her Eyes Were So Stern, So Insistent. Beautiful.

Creemos Enla Valentía. Creemos En Tomar Acciones. Creemos En La Liberarnos Del Miedo Y En La Adquisición De Habilidades Necesarias Para Obligar A Que Lo Malos Salga De Nuestro Mundo Para Que El Bien Pueda Prosperar Y Florecer

Honesty Leads To Peace.

I Wish I Could Say I Felt Guilty For What I Did. I Don't.

Yes," Marcus Says. "i Understand That You Are Concerned -- That You All Are Concerned. You Had Never Heard Of The Divergent A Week Ago, And Now All That You Know Is That They Are Immune To Something To Which You Are Susceptible, And That Is A Frightening Thing. But I Can Assure You That There Is Nothing To Be Afraid Of, As Far As We Are Concerned." As He Speaks, His Head Tilts And His Eyebrows Lift In Sympathy, And I Understand At Once Why Some People Like Him. He Makes You Feel That If You Just Placed Everything In His Hands, He Would Take Care Of It.

She Must Love Me, To Worry About Me. She Must Still Be Capable Of Love.

And Then The Screaming Begins.

You Are Far Less Likely To Soil Your Pants And Cry For Your Mother If You’re Prepared To Defend Yourself.

We Believe That Preparation Eradicates Cowardice, Which We Define As The Failure To Act In The Midst Of Fear.

My Parents Did Love Each Other. Enough To Forsake Plans And Factions. Enough To Defy “faction Before Blood.” Blood Before Faction--no, Love Before Faction, Always. - Tris Prior

I Am No Longer Tris, The Selfless, Or Tris, The Brave. I Suppose That Now, I Must Become More Than Either.

He Told Me Once To Be Brave, And Though I Have Stood Still While Knives Spun Toward My Face And Jumped Off A Roof, I Never Thought I Would Need Bravery In The Small Moments Of My Life. I Do.

Desperation Can Make A Person Do Surprising Things.

The Theory Is That If You Spill All Your Secrets, You'll Have No Desire To Lie About Anything, Ever Again. Like The Worst About You Is Already In The Open, So Why Not Just Be Honest?

We've All Started To Put Down The Virtues Of The Other Factions In The Process Of Bolstering Our Own. I Don't Want To Do That. I Want To Be Brave, And Selfless, And Smart, And Kind, And Honest." He Clears His Throat. "i Continually Struggle With Kindness.

I Can’t Leave Now. I Like Her Too Much. There, I Said It. But I Won’t Say It Again.

Peter Leans Forward And Looks Into My Eyes. "the Serum Will Go Into Effect In One Minute," He Says. "be Brave, Tris." My Heart Begins To Race. Why Would Peter Tell Me To Be Brave? Why Would He Offer Any Kind Words At All?

The Opinions Of Others Cannot Damage You.

I Came Here So That No One Else Would Die. I Came Here To Protect As Many People As I Could. And I Care More About Tobias's Safety Than Anyone Else's. So Why Am I Here, If He's Here? What's The Point?

The Man Running Toward Me Is Not A Man, He Is A Boy. A Shaggy-haired Boy With A Crease Between His Eyebrows. Will. Dull-eyed And Mindless, But Still Will. He Stops Running And Mirrors Me, His Feet Planted And His Gun Up. In An Instant, I See His Finger Poised Over The Trigger And Hear The Bullet Slide Into The Chamber, And I Fire. My Eyes Squeezed Shut. Can't Breathe. The Bullet Hit Him In The Head. I Know Because That's Where I Aimed It.

When I Look At Him, I Don't See The Cowardly Young Man Who Sold Me Out To Jeanine Matthews, And I Don't Hear The Excuses He Gave Afterward. When I Look At Him, I See The Boy Who Held My Hand In The Hospital When Our Mother Broke Her Wrist And Told Me It Would Be All Right. I See The Brother Who Told Me To Make My Own Choices, The Night Before The Choosing Ceremony. I Think Of All The Remarkable Things He Is--smart And Enthusiastic And Observant, Quiet And Earnest And Kind.

Eric Walks Toward Me, And I Back Away By Instinct. I Try Not To Be Afraid Of Him, But I Know How Smart He Is And That If I’m Not Careful He’ll Notice That I Keep Staring At Her, And That Will Be My Undoing.

I Feel Like Myself, Strong And Weak At Once - Allowed, At Least For A Little While, To Be Both.

He Slides His Hand Over My Cheek, One Finger Anchored Behind My Ear. Then He Tilts His Head Down And Kisses Me, Sending A Warm Ache Through My Body. I Wrap My Hands Around His Arm, Holding Him There As Long As I Can. When He Touches Me, The Hollowed-out Feeling In My Chest And Stomach Is Not As Noticeable.

But I Will Find New Habits, New Thoughts, New Rules. I Will Become Something Else.

Why Is Your Heart Racing Tris?

I'm Going To Stop A Revolution,'' I Say. I Turn Right, And Peter Follows Me.

And Now That You Are Out? How Does The World Seem To You?" He Says. "mostly The Same," I Say. "people Are Just Divided By Different Things, Fighting Different Wars.

Sometimes Crying Or Laughing Are The Only Options Left, And Laughing Feels Better Right Now.

The Gun Goes Off. I Fall.

With Four? Doing A Little... Addition? Multiplication?

Lynn Smacks Uriah Hard In The Back Of The Head, Christina Says, “hey Tris!” And Uriah Cries, “ow! How On Earth Do You Make A Pillow Hurt, Lynn?” “my Exceptional Strength,” She Says.

Then I Realize What It Is. It's Him. Something About Him Makes Me Feel Like I Am About To Fall. Or Turn To Liquid. Or Burst Into Flames.

It Reminds Me That No Embrace Will Ever Feel The Same Again, Because No One Will Ever Be Like Her Again, Because She's Gone. She's Gone, And Crying Feels So Useless, So Stupid, But It's All I Can Do.

I Have A Theory That Selflessness And Bravery Aren't All That Different.

The Truth Is... You Are Hurting Me. Not On Purpose, I Know That. But I Love You And Every Second That You Don´t Love Me Back...it Hurts.

If The Dauntless Knew About This, Everyone Would Be Getting In Line To Learn How To Drive It,” He Says. “including Me.” “no, They Would Be Strapping Themselves To The Wings.” Christina Pokes His Arm. “don’t You Know Your Own Faction?

Why Are You Constantly Escorting Me Places?” I Say. “isn’t There A Depraved Activity You’re Supposed To Be Taking Part In? Kicking Puppies Or Spying On Girls While They Change, Or Something?

Yes," I Say. "three Of These Flying Birds." I Touch My Collarbone, Marking The Path Of Their Flight - Toward My Heart. One For Each Member Of The Family I Left Behind.

I Met Him While I Was Imprisoned," I Say, And My Voice Sounds Far Away Even To Me. "i Was Just Curious." "i Wouldn't Judge Him Too Harshly," Says Fernando. "jeanine Can Be Extraordinarily Persuasive To Those Who Aren't Naturally Suspicious. I Have Always Been Naturally Suspicious." ... "yeah," I Say. "so Have I.

And I Provide Much- Needed Eye Candy.

What Do You Think They're Going To Do To Us When They Find Us Guilty?" She Says After A Few Minutes Of Silence Have Passed. "honestly?" "does Now Seem Like The Time For Honesty?" I Look At Her From The Corner Of My Eye. "i Think They're Going To Force Us To Eat Lots Of Cake And Then Take An Unreasonably Long Nap.

He Kisses Me Again, More Insistent This Time, His Hands Squeezing My Waist. His Breaths, His Body, My Body, We Are So Close There Is No Difference.

I Also Don't Believe That Whatever Come After Life Depends On My Correctly Reciting A List Of My Transgressions-that Sounds Too Much Like An Erudite Afterlife To Me, All Accuracy And No Feeling.

Everything Inside Me Screams For Just One More Kiss, One More Word, One More Glance, One More.

But That Wasn´t The First Time I Ever Saw Her. I Saw Her In The Hallways At School, And At My Mother’s False Funeral, And Walking The Sidewalks In The Abnegation Sector. I Saw Her, But I Didn’t See Her; No One Saw Her The Way She Truly Was Until She Jumped. I Suppose A Fire That Burns That Bright Is Not Meant To Last.

"i'll Be Your Family Now," He Says. "i Love You," I Say. He Stares At Me. I Wait With My Hands Clutching His Arms For Stability As He Considers His Response. He Frowns At Me. "say It Again." "tobias," I Say, "i Love You."

That Night We Push Our Cots Just A Little Closer Together, And Look Into Each Other's Eyes In The Moments Before We Fall Asleep. When He Finally Drifts Off, Our Fingers Are Twisted Together In The Space Between The Beds. I Smile A Little, And Let Myself Go.

Fine," He Says. "then I Love You.

I Knew By The Way He Looked At Her That He Held Her In A Higher Regard Than He Held Even Himself. No Selfishness Or Insecurity Kept Him From Seeing The Full Extent Of Her Goodeness, As It So Often Does With The Rest Of Us. That Kind Of Love May Only Be Possible In Abnegation. I Do Not Know. My Father: Erudite-born, Abnegation-grown. He Often Found It Difficult To Live Up To The Demands Of His Chosen Faction, Just As I Did. But He Tried, And He Knew True Selflessness When He Saw It.

You're Not A Coward Just Because You Don't Want To Hurt People.

You Won," Four Mutters. "stop." I Wipe The Sweat From My Forehead. He Stares At Me. His Eyes Are Too Wide; They Look Alarmed.

We Share A Common Enemy, But Does That Make Us Friends?

She'll Have To Get Over It, Then. Are You Going To Let Her Drop Out Of Dauntless For A Stupid Reason Like Not Being Able To Walk?" Zeke Is Quiet For A Few Seconds. His Eyes Shift Over My Face, And He Squints, As If Weighing And Measuring Me. Then He Turns And Bends And Wraps His Arms Around Me. It's Been So Long Since Someone Hugged Me That I Stiffen. Then I Relax, And Let The Gesture Force Warmth Over My Body.

It's Wrong," He Says. "it Doesn't Matter If Your Parents Are In A Better Place, They Aren't Here With You, And That's Wrong, Tris. It Shouldn't Have Happened. It Shouldn't Have Happened To You. And Anyone Who Tells You It's Okay Is A Liar.

He Smiles In My Memory. A Curled Lip. Straight Teeth. Light In His Eyes. Laughing, Teasing, More Alive In Memory Than I M In Reality. It Was Him Or Me. I Chose Me. But I Feel Dead Too.

Sometimes, The Best Way To Help Someone Is Just To Be Near Them.

I Have To Face The Fear. I Have To Take Control Of The Situation And Find A Way To Make It Less Frightening.

Just Do What You're Supposed To.

A Sob Racks My Body Again, And He Wraps His Arms Around Me So Tightly I Find It Difficult To Breathe, But It Doesn't Matter. My Dignified Weeping Gives Way To Full-on Ugliness, My Mouth Open And My Face Contorted And Sounds Like A Dying Animal Coming From My Throat. If This Continues I Will Break Apart, And Maybe That Would Be Better, Maybe It Would Be Better To Shatter And Bear Nothing.

Four Grabs A Bar With Each Hand And Pulls Himself Up, Easy, Like He's Sitting Up In Bed. But He Is Not Comfortable Or Natural Here--- Every Muscle In His Arm Stands Out. It Is A Stupid Thing For Me To Think When I Am One Hundred Feet Off The Ground.

What Did You Do?” I Mumble. He Is Just A Few Feet Away From Me Now, But Not Close Enough To Hear Me. As He Passes Me He Stretches Out His Hand. He Wraps It Around My Palm And Squeezes. Squeezes, Then Lets Go. His Eyes Are Bloodshot; He Is Pale. “what Did You Do?” This Time The Question Tears From My Throat Like A Growl. I Throw Myself Toward Him, Struggling Against Peter’s Grip, Though His Hands Chafe. “what Did You Do?” I Scream. “you Die, I Die Too” Tobias Looks Over His Shoulder At Me. “i Asked You Not To Do This. You Made Your Decision. These Are The Repercussions.

It Is More Important For You To Be Safe Than Right, For The Time Being. Understand? (...) But Please, When You See An Opportunity...ruin Them

They All Laugh. We All Laugh. And It Occurs To Me That I Might Be Meeting Tobias's True Faction. They Are Not Characterized By A Particular Virtue. They Claim All Colors, All Activities, All Virtues, And All Flaws As Their Own.

I Wonder How I Seem To Them. They Must See Someone I Don't See. Someone Capable And Strong. Someone I Can't Be; Someone I Can Be.

Without Thinking, I Grab Al's Arm And Squeeze It As Tightly As I Can. I Just Need Something To Hold On To. Blood Runs Down The Side Of Christina's Face And Splatters On The Ground Next To Her Cheek. This Is The First Time I Have Ever Prayed For Someone To Fall Unconscious.... Al Frees His Hand And Pulls Me Tight To His Side. I Clench My Teeth To Keep From Crying Out.

I Cross My Arms. "it Was A Two Minute Conversation." "i Don't Think A Smaller Time Frame Makes It Less Unwise." He Furrows His Eyebrows And Touches The Corner Of My Bruised Eye With His Fingertips. My Head Jerks Back, But He Doesn't Take His Hand Away. Instead He Sighs. "you Know, If You Could Just Learn To Attack First, You Might Do Better." "attack First?" I Say. "how Will That Help?" "you're Fast. If You Can Get A Few Good Hits In Before They Know What's Going On, You Could Win." He Shrugs, And His Hand Falls.

I Ignore My Fear. When I Make Decisions, I Pretend It Doesn't Exist.

Be Brave, Beatrice. I Love You.

Or Maybe We'll Make A Home Somewhere Inside Ourselves, To Carry With Us Wherever We Go- Which Is The Way I Carry My Mother Now.

But Maybe What I Saw As Fearless Was Actually Fear Under Control.

I Like To Think That Im Helping Them By Hating Them

She Tips Her Chin Up And Looks At Me With That Abnegation Stubbornness I Know So Well. She May Have Left Them, But They Are What’s Making Her Strong.

If They Told Us What To Believe, And We Didn't Come To It On Our Own, Is It Still True?

I Glance At Tris. She Grins At Me, Then Leans In To Whisper Something To Christina. "are You Here To Help Or What, Stiff?" I Say.

Why Do You Say Vague Things If You Don't Want To Be Asked About Them?

I Note How Calm She Looks And How Focused She Is. She Is Well-practiced In The Art Of Losing Herself. I Can't Say The Same Of Myself.

I Love 'harry Potter.' I'm A Huge Nerd - I Would Dress Up If I Could.

I Do Like To Hit People-i Like The Explosion Of Power And Energy, And The Feeling That I Am Untouchable Because I Can Hurt People. But I Hate That Part Of Myself, Because It Is The Part Of Me That Is The Most Broken

It Must Be Because You're So Approachable", I Say Flatly. "you Know, Like A Bed Of Nails." He Stares At Me, And I Don't Look Away. He Isn't A Dog But The Same Rules Apply. Looking Away Is Submissive. Looking Him In The Eye Is A Challenge. It's My Choice. Heat Rushes Into My Cheeks. What Will Happen When This Tension Breaks? But He Just Says, "careful, Tris.

Those Who Seek Peace Above All Else, They Say, Will Always Deceive To Keep The Water Calm.

I Have Never Been Carried Around By A Large Boy, Or Laughed Until My Stomach Hurt At The Dinner Table, Or Listened To The Clamor Of A Hundred People All Talking At Once. Peace Is Restrained; This Is Free.

People, I Have Discovered, Are Layers And Layers Of Secrets. You Believe You Know Them, That You Understand Them, But Their Motives Are Always Hidden From You, Buried In Their Own Hearts. You Will Never Know Them, But Sometimes You Decide To Trust Them.

In Our Factions, We Find Meaning, We Find Purpose, We Find Life.

I Love Tris The Divergent, Who Makes Decisions Apart From Faction Loyalty, Who Isn’t Some Faction Archetype. But The Tris Who’s Trying As Hard As She Can To Destroy Herself … I Can’t Love Her.

Tris," Said Tobias. "i Love You

I Get Up, Because I’m Supposed To, But If It Were Up To Me, I’d Stay In My Seat For The Rest Of Time.

Every Question That Can Be Answered Must Beanswered Or At Least Engaged. Illogical Thought Processes Must Bechallenged When They Arise.wrong Answers Must Be Corrected.correct Answers Must Be Affirmed. —from The Erudite Faction Manifesto

I Am A Naturally Curious Person. -tris

I Do Know Who You Are. I Just Needed To Be Reminded.

I Fell In Love With Him. But I Don't Just Stay With Him By Default As If There's No One Else Available To Me. I Stay With Him Because I Choose To, Every Day That I Wake Up, Every Day That We Fight Or Lie To Each Other Or Disappoint Each Other. I Choose Him Over And Over Again, And He Chooses Me.

Oh For God's Sake. I'll Just Carry You.

It's Strange How Time Can Make A Place Shrink, Make Its Strangeness Ordinary.

Before I Chose Dauntless...i Felt Assured Of My Long Lifespan, If Nothing Else. Now There Are No Reassurances Except That Where I Go, I Go Because I Choose To.

For A Few Minutes We Kiss, Deep In The Chasm, With The Roar Of Water All Around Us. And We Rise, Hand In Hand, I Realize That If We Had Both Chosen Differently, We Might Have Ended Up Doing The Same Thing, In A Safer Place, In Gray Clothes Instead Of Black Ones.

Arrogance Is One Of The Flaws In The Erudite Heart -- I Know. It Is Often In Mine.

It's Easy To Be Brave When They're Not My Fears.

And He’s Right To Say That Every Faction Loses Something When It Gains A Virtue: The Dauntless, Brave But Cruel; The Erudite, Intelligent But Vain; The Amity, Peaceful But Passive; The Candor, Honest But Inconsiderate; The Abnegation, Selfless But Stifling.

God Tris, Are You Even Human?

I Get The Strange Urge To Hit My Head Against The Wall. Other People's Sobs Make Me Feel Uncomfortable.

For Me, It Feels Like Driving From Truth Into A Lie, From Adulthood To Childhoold. I Watch The Land Of Pavement And Glass And Metal Turn Into An Empty Field. The Snow Is Falling Softly Now, And I Can Faintly See The City's Skyline Up Ahead, The Buildings Just A Shade Darker Than The Clouds.

What's Worse: To Be Idle While Someone Dies, Or To Be Exiled And Empty-handed?

I Keep Finding Myself Stifled By The Company Of Others And Then Crippled By Loneliness When I Leave Them. I Am Terrified And I Don't Even Know Of What, Because I Have Lost Everything Already.

Lost Everything

I See A Few Hands Stretching Out To Me At The Edge Of The Net, So I Grabbed The First One I Could Reach And Pull Myself Across. I Roll Off, And Would Have Fallen Face-first Onto A Wood Floor If He Had Not Caught Me. "he" Is The Young Man Attached To The Hand I Grabbed. He Has A Spare Upper Lip And A Full Lower Lip. His Eyes Are So Deep-set That His Eyelashes Touch The Skin Under His Eyebrows, And They Are Dark Blue, A Dreaming, Sleeping, Waiting Color.

Four Sits Down On The Edge Of The Carousel, Leaning Against A Plastic Horse's Foot. His Eyes Lift To The Sky, Where There Are No Stars, Only A Round Moon Peking Through A Thin Layer Of Clouds. The Muscles In His Arms Are Relaxed; His Hand Rests On The Back Of His Neck. He Looks Almost Comfortable, Holding That Gun To His Shoulder. I Close My Eyes Briefly. Why Does He Distract Me So Easily? I Need To Focus.

I Just Wanted To Thank You' He Says, His Voice Low. 'a Group Of Scientists Told You That My Genes Were Damaged, That There Was Something Wrong With Me - They Showed You The Test Results That Proved It. And Even I Started To Believe It.' He Touches My Face, His Thumb Skimming My Cheekbone, And His Eyes Are On Mine, Intense And Insistent. 'you Never Believed It,' He Says 'not For A Second. You Always Insisted I Was... I Don't Know, Whole.

I Know That I Am Birdlike, Made Narrow And Small As If For Taking Flight, Built Straight-waisted And Fragile. But When He Touches Me Like He Can't Bear To Take His Hand Away, I Don't Wish I Was Any Different.

I Shield My Eyes From The Sun To See Her Cold Look—the Expression I Saw In My Mind Even Before I Looked At Her. She Looks Older To Me Than She Ever Has, Stern And Tough And Worn By Time. I Feel That Way, Too. “these People Have No Regard For Human Life,” She Says. “they’re About To Wipe The Memories Of All Our Friends And Neighbors. They’re Responsible For The Deaths Of A Large Majority Of Our Old Faction.” She Sidesteps Me And Marches Toward The Door. “i Think They’re Lucky I’m Not Going To Kill Them.

Caleb," I Say, "i Love You." His Eyes Gleam With Tear As He Says, "i Love You, Too, Beatrice.

To Me, When Someone Wrongs You, You Both Share The Burden Of That Wrongdoing - The Pain Of It Weighs On Both Of You. Forgiveness, Then, Means Choosing To Bear The Full Weight All By Yourself. Caleb's Betrayal Is Something We Both Carry, And Since He Did It, All I've Wanted Is For Him To Take Its Weight Away From Me. I Am Not Sure That I'm Capable Of Shouldering It All Myself - Not Sure That I Am Strong Enough, Or Good Enough.

I Ignore My Fear,” He Says. “when I Make Decisions, I Pretend It Doesn’t Exist.” I Stare At Him For A Second. I Can’t Help It. To Me There’s A Difference Between Not Being Afraid And Acting In Spite Of Fear, As He Does.

But Now I’m Wondering If I Need It Anymore, If We Ever Really Need These Words, “dauntless,” “erudite,” “divergent,” “allegiant,” Or If We Can Just Be Friends Or Lovers Or Siblings, Defined Instead By The Choices We Make And The Love And Loyalty That Binds Us.

It Is Amazing How Pretending To Be In A Different Faction Changes Everything -- Even The Way I Walk. That Must Be Why It's So Strange That I Could Easily Belong In Three Of Them.

I Settle Into Their Pace. The Uniform Pounding Of Feet In My Ears And The Homogeneity Of The People Around Me Makes Me Believe That I Could Choose This. I Could Be Subsumed Into Abnegation’s Hive Mind, Projecting Always Outward.

You Don’t Believe Things Because They Make Your Life Better, You Believe Them Because They’re True.

I Always Appreciate People's Opinions, But Sometimes I Have To Take A Step Back And Remember Why I'm Writing And What I Want To Do With It. Shutting Out The Voices Is Difficult But It's Been Good For Me.

I'm Going To Shoot A Muffin Off Marlene's Head.

She Has Been To The Compound Before. She Remembered This Hallway. She Knows About The Initiation Process. My Mother Was Dauntless.

Is This Prior?" "in The Flesh." "why's He Bleeding?" "because He's An Idiot." Zeke Offers Me A Black Jacket With A Factionless Symbol Stitched Into The Collar. "i Didn't Know That Idiocy Caused People To Just Start Spontaneously Bleeding From The Nose." I Wrap The Jacket Around Caleb's Shoulders And Fasten One Of The Buttons Over His Chest. He Avoids My Eyes. "i Think It's A New Phenomenon.", I Say.

What Do--" Tobias's Voice. Tobias! "oh My God. Oh--" "spare Me Your Blubbering, Okay? Peter Says. "she's Not Dead; She's Just Paralyzed. It'll Only Last For About A Minute. Now Get Ready To Run." I Don't Understand. How Does Peter Know? "let Me Carry Her," Tobias Says. "no. You're A Better Shot Than I Am. Take My Gun. I'll Carry Her.

You're More Than Dauntless," He Says In A Low Voice. "but If You Want To Be Just Like Them, Hurling Yourself Into Ridiculous Situations For No Reason And Retaliating Against Your Enemies Without Any Regard For What's Ethical, Go Right Ahead. I Thought You Were Better Than That, But Maybe I Was Wrong.

In 'insurgent' We Realise How Large The World Really Is

She Taught Me All About Real Sacrifice. That It Should Be Done From Love... That It Should Be Done From Necessity, Not Without Exhausting All Other Options. That It Should Be Done For People Who Need Your Strength Because They Don't Have Enough Of Their Own.

I Brought You The Truth About Our City And The Reason We Are In It. If You Aren't Thanking Me For It, You Should At Least Do Something About It Instead Of Sitting Here On This Mess You Made, Pretending It's A Throne!

I Do Trust You, Is What I Want To Say. But It Isn't True -- I Didn't Trust Him To Love Me Despite The Terrible Things I Had Done. I Don't Trust Anyone To Do That, But That Isn't His Problem; It's Mine.

The Cruelty Of Fate Is That I Must Travel With The People I Hate When The People I Love Are Dead Behind Me.

Choices Can Be Made Again." -evelyn Johnson (eaton)

From One Tyrant To Another. That Is The World We Know, Now

There Is A Difference Between Admitting And Confessing. Admitting Involves Softening, Making Excuses For Things That Cannot Be Excused; Confessing Just Names The Crimes At Its Full Severity.

Sometimes Pain Is For The Greater Good.

He Touches My Face, Covering My Cheeks With His Hands, Sliding His Fingertips Down My Neck, Fitting His Fingers To The Slight Curve Of My Hips. I Can't Stop.

I Am Selfish. I Am Brave.

Pride Blinds People To The Truth Of What They Are.

What Did You Do, Memorize A Map Of The City For Fun?” Says Christina. “yes,” Says Will, Looking Puzzled. “didn’t You?

People Tend To Overestimate My Character," I Say Quietly. "they Think That Because I'm Small, Or A Girl, Or A Stiff, I Can't Possibly Be Cruel. But They're Wrong.

Suicide To Them Is An Act Of Selfishness. Someone Who Is Truly Selfless Does Not Think Of Himself Often Enough To Desire Death.

But Now I Know How Large The World Is... Well. I Suppose I Have Grown To Large Out Of My Faction. As A Consequence.

I Breathe In. The Water Will Wash My Wounds Clean. I Breathe Out. My Mother Submerged Me In Water When I Was A Baby, To Give Me To God. It Has Been A Long Time Since I Thought About God, But I Think About Him Now. It Is Only Natural. I Am Glad, Suddenly, That I Shot Eric In The Foot Instead Of The Head.

I Don’t Know What World You Live In, But In Mine, People Only Do Things For You For One Of Two Reasons. The First Is If They Want Something In Return. And The Second Is If They Feel Like They Owe You Something.

My Heart Beats So Hard It Hurts, And I Can't Scream And I Can't Breathe, But I Also Feel Everything, Every Vein And Every Fiber, Every Bone And Every Nerve, All Awake And Buzzing In My Body As If Charged With Electricity. I Am Pure Adrenaline.

Cowardice Is How You Decide To Be In Real Life

You Don’t Always Have To Smack People In The Face With How Strong You Are

We Are Not The Same. But We Are, Somehow, One.

I Belong To The People I Love, And They Belong To Me--they, And The Love And Loyaty I Give Them, Form My Identity Far More Than Any Word Or Group Ever Could.

"but Please, When You See An Opportunity..." He Presses His Hand To My Cheek, Cold And Strong, And Tilts My Head Up So I Have To Look At Him. His Eyes Glint. They Almost Look Predatory. "ruin Them."

Because Even A Sliver Of Distance Between Us Is Infuriating.

In That Moment I Know Exactly What I Want; I Want To Peel Away All The Layers Of Clothing Between Us, Strip Away Everything That Separates Us, The Past And The Present And The Future.

I'm Sick Of Doing Bad Things And Liking It And Then Wondering What's Wrong With Me. I Want It To Be Over. I Want To Start Again.

Nothing Else Is Alright. But We Are. -tobias

Everything - Our Houses, Our Clothes, Our Hairstyles - Is Meant To Help Us Forget Ourselves And To Protect Us From Vanity, Greed And Envy, Which Are Just Forms Of Selfishness. If We Have Little, And Want For Little, And We Are All Equal, We Envy No One.

...there Is Power In Self-sacrifice.

I Have Realized That Part Of Being Dauntless Is Being Willing To Make Things More Difficult For Yourself In Order To Be Self-sufficient. There's Nothing Especially Brave About Wandering Dark Streets With No Flashlight, But We Are Not Supposed To Need Help, Even From Light. We Are Supposed To Be Capable Of Anything. I Like That. Because Their Might Come A Day When There Is No Flashlight, There Is No Gun, There Is No Guiding Hand. And I Want To Be Ready.

Oh. I Just Assumed... That Because I Am So Absorbed By Him Everyone Must Be Too.

What Good Is A Prepared Body If You Have A Scattered Mind?

The First Step To Loving Someone Else Is To Recognize The Evil In Ourselves, So We Can Forgive Them.

Ingenuity Requires Creativity.

Then Drew Shuffles Into The Dining Hall. I Drop My Toast, And My Mouth Drifts Open. Calling Him “bruised” Would Be An Understatement. His Face Is Swollen And Purple. He Has A Split Lip And A Cut Running Through His Eyebrow. He Keeps His Eyes Down On The Way To His Table, Not Even Lifting Them To Look At Me. I Glance Across The Room At Four. He Wears The Satisfied Smile I Wish I Had On.

Uriah Looked Better Than He Did An Hour Ago--he Washed The Blood From His Mouth, And Some Of The Color Returned To His Face. I'm Struck, Suddenly, By How Handsome He Is-- All His Features Are Proportionate, His Eyes Dark And Lively, His Skin Bronze-brown. And He Has Probably Always Been Handsome. Only Boys Who Have Been Handsome From A Young Age Have That Arrogance In Their Smile. Not Like Tobias, Who Is Almost Shy When He Smiles Like He Is Surprised You Bothered To Look At Him From The First Place.

Who Is He When He Isn't Dauntless, Isn't An Instructor, Isn't Four, Isn't Anything In Particular? Whoever He Is, I Like Him. It's Easier To Admit That To Myself Now, In The Dark, After All That Just Happened. He Is Not Sweet Or Gentle Or Particularly Kind. But He Is Smart And Brave, And Even Though He Saved Me, He Treated Me Like I Was Strong. That Is All I Need To Know.

I Have To Admit That Christina Is Good—though I Don’t Like Giving Credit To Candor Smart-mouths—and So Is Peter—though I Don’t Like Giving Credit To Future Psychopaths.

Four!" I Call Out. Why Am I Calling A Number? Oh Yes. Because That's His Name. — Tris.

The Dauthless Have The Wierdest Slang. Pansycake, Nose...is There A Term For The Candor?" "of Course."uriah Grins."jerks

I Forget That He Is Another Person; Instead It Feels Like He Is Another Part Of Me, Just As Essential As A Heart Or An Eye Or An Arm.

Maybe I Was Afraid To Trust Him With Something So Personal As My Devotion.

Do You Know Him Well?" I Ask.i Am Too Curious; I Always Have Been. "everyone Knows Four," She Says. "we Were Initiates Together.i Was Bad At Fighting,so He Taught Me Every Night After Everyone Was Asleep." She Scratches The Back Of Her Neck, Her Expression Suddenly Serious. "nice Of Him." She Gets Up And Stands Behind The Members Sitting In The Doorway. In A Second, Her Serious Expression Is Gone,but I Still Feel Rattled By What She Said, Half Confused By The Idea Of Four Being "nice" And Half Wanting To Punch Her For No Apparent Reason.

Fear Doesn't Shut You Down; It Wakes You Up. I've Seen It. It's Fascinating." He Releases Me But Doesn't Pull Away, His Hand Grazing My Jaw, My Neck. "sometimes I Just...want To See It Again. Want To See You Awake.

Becoming Fearless Isn't The Point. That's Impossible. It's Learning How To Control Your Fear, And How To Be Free From It.

One Choice One Choice, Decided Your Friends. One Choice, Defines Your Beliefs. One Choice, Determines Your Loyalties - Forever. Once Choice Can Transform You

But I Killed A Man Just Like My Mother Did. David Says It’s Okay Because I Didn’t Mean To, And Because He Was About To Kill That Little Kid. But I’m Pretty Sure My Mom Didn’t Mean To Kill My Dad, Either, So What Difference Does That Make, Meaning Or Not Meaning To Do Something? Accident Or On Purpose, The Result Is The Same, And That’s One Fewer Life Than There Should Be In The World.

Tris," Tobias Says, Crouching Next To Me. His Face Is Pale, Almost Yellow. There Is Too Much I Want To Say. The First Thing That Comes Out Is, "beatrice." He Laughs Weakly. "beatrice," He Amends, And Touches His Lips To Mine. I Curl My Fingers Into His Shirt.

It's Not Often Real That You Encounter The Real Person Behind A Good-natured Mask, The Darkest Part Of Someone. It's Not Comfortable What You Do.

I Think About Pressing Myself Against Him, But I Can't, Because All Our Secrets Would Keep A Space Between Us.

I'm Divergent. And I Can't Be Controlled.

When I Get Home, I Sit On The Front Step And Take Deep Breaths Of The Cool Spring Air For A Few Minutes. My Mother Was The One Who Taught Me To Steal Moments Like Those, Moments Of Freedom, Though She Didn't Now It. I Watched Her... But I Learned Something Else From Watching Her Too, Which Is That The Free Moments Always Have To End.

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