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I Have Two Kids Who Were Like Me, We Get Out Of Bed Feeling Good, And The Other Two Would Sit At The Breakfast Table And Grumble. I Think It's Born Into Us. I Usually Wake Up Feeling Pretty Good. Looking Forward To The Day.

-Dick Van Dyke

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I Have Two Kids

Dick Van Dyke

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I Have Two Kids Who Were Like Me, We Get Out Of Bed Feeling Good, And The Other Two Would Sit At The Breakfast Table And Grumble. I Think It's Born Into Us. I Usually Wake Up Feeling Pretty Good. Looking Forward To The Day.

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I Could Probably Play An Alcoholic. I've Had Some Experience With That.

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Meaning Of Life

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Best Experiences

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A Producer Came To Me About Doing A Memoir, And At First I Thought, "well, It's A Little Bland." But Then I Realized That Almost Everything That's Happened To Me Was The Result Of Being In The Right Place At The Right Time. And I Thought "well, Luck Has A Lot To Do With It," So I Wrote It From That Perspective.

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So I Think We're Kind Of An Alternate Choice For People Who Have Had It With Sex And Violence.

Haters Are Going To Hate.

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I Have Two Kids Who Were Like Me, We Get Out Of Bed Feeling Good, And The Other Two Would Sit At The Breakfast Table And Grumble. I Think It's Born Into Us. I Usually Wake Up Feeling Pretty Good. Looking Forward To The Day.

I'm Always Announcing My Retirement. I'm Still Not Retired.

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The Secret To Keeping Moving Is Keeping Moving.

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My Wife, As Proud As She Was Of Me, Hated Show Business For Good Reasons. There Was Something About The Spouse Always Being Pushed Out Of The Way, Shoved Aside. She Wanted To Get Away From It.

Emotionally I'm About 13.

I Decided, When I Started Having Kids, That I'd Try Not To Do Anything That I Wouldn't Be Proud For Them To See. I've Kind Of Stuck With That, And I Don't Regret That At All, Although I've Lost Money And Passed Up A Lot Of Projects Because Of It. But I Feel Good About That.

There Are Tribes All Over The World Who Sing And Dance Every Day As Part Of Their Lives. And We Oughta Do That.

Everything's Getting Homogenized. It Seems To Me Like Music And Behavior And Everything Else Is Getting Homogenized.

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I Hear Music And My Feet Just Start Moving.

You Know, I'm Almost Out Of The Habit Of Watching Episodic Television Now.

I Think There's Kind Of A Wave Of Nostalgia Going On Right At The Moment. You Know, People Recall An Earlier Time, Which They See As A Better Time. And I Think We Just Kind Of Evoke Good Thoughts When They Look At Us. That's The Feeling I Get.

My Brother And I Laughed A Lot As Kids. We Came Up In The Middle Of The Depression, And Neither One Of Us Knew We Were Poor. We Had Nothing, But We Didn't Know It.

When I Get Some Budding Young Comic Who'll Come Up To Me And Say, 'what Was It Like To Do It In Those Days?' I Try To Be As Gracious To Him As Stan Laurel Was To Me.

My Kids Are So Much Better Parent Than I Was.

As Wonderful As They Were, My Parents Didn't Teach Me Anything About Self-discipline, Concentration, Patience, Or Focus. If I Hadn't Had A Family Myself, I Probably Never Would've Done Anything. Marriage Taught Me Responsibility.

But I Wish They Would Make A Musical Of Some Kind. I Miss Musicals So Much. You Don't See Them Anymore.

Somebody Asked What I Wanted On My Gravestone. I'm Just Going To Put: 'glad I Could Help.'

I Loved To Fall Down.

I Played A Killer Twice. Once On 'matlock,' On Andy Griffith's Show, I Got To Play The Killer.

No, I Did Night Clubs Right Here In Los Angeles. My Partner, Phil Erickson, Put Me In The Business, A Guy From My Home Town, A Dear Friend Who We Just Lost A Couple Of Months Ago.

I Think The Saddest Moment In My Life Just Happened Two Months Ago. My Old Nightclub Partner Passed Away, Phil Erickson Down In Atlanta. He - I Owe Him Everything. He Put Me In The Business And Taught Me About Everything I Know.

Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates, I'm A Nerd And I Read Books

I Grew Up In Danville, Illinois, Right In The Middle Of The State.

My Work Is Just A Hobby. No, I Wouldn't Want To Do It Professionally. It's Too Hard. Deadlines Are No Fun. But I Can Sit And Tweak All Night And Not Worry About Time.

You're Going To Die. That's Going To Happen. What Matters Is What You Do With Your Time Before You Get Flushed Out.

I Cannot Tell You What It Means When Children Recognize. This Is About The Third Generation For Me. And When Kids That Small Recognize Me, It Really Pleases Me, Very Gratifying.

I've Never Been What You'd Call A Great Singer, But I Loved To Sing.

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You Can Spread Jelly On The Peanut Butter But You Can't Spread Peanut Butter On The Jelly.

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In The Best Of All Worlds, The Producers Would Take Some Responsibility For The Kinds Of Things They're Putting Out. Unfortunately, They Don't.

Once You Get The Kids Raised And The Mortgage Paid Off And Accomplish What You Wanted To Do In Life, There's A Great Feeling Of: 'hey, I'm Free As A Bird.'

Rob Petrie Is Who I Really Am - In Personality And General Ineffectiveness.

Ineffectiveness

I Sing All Day. And It's Good For You. Good For Your Vocal Cords.

I Would Love To Be Moses.

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In My Seventies, I Exercised To Stay Ambulatory. In My Eighties, I Exercise To Avoid Assisted Living.

Oh, Well, My First Love Is Comedy Or Singing And Dancing.

One Day In '61, I Was Looking In The Santa Monica Phone Book For A Number, And There It Was: Stan Laurel, Ocean Avenue In Santa Monica. I Went Over There And Spent The Afternoon With Them. And Pumped Him With Questions. I Must Have Driven Him Crazy. I Spent A Lot Of Happy Hours At Stan's House On Sundays Just Talking About Comedy.

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Stan Said He Used To Keep Hardy Late, Make Him Miss His Golf Game, And Really Get Him Mad.

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