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We Were Taught To Be Dependable, Responsible, The Top Of Our Classes At School, The Most Organized And Efficient Babysitters In Town, The Very Miniature Models Of Our Hardworking Farmer/nurse Mother, A Pair Of Junior Swiss Army Knives, Born To Multitask.

-Elizabeth Gilbert

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We Were Taught To

Elizabeth Gilbert

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We Were Taught To Be Dependable, Responsible, The Top Of Our Classes At School, The Most Organized And Efficient Babysitters In Town, The Very Miniature Models Of Our Hardworking Farmer/nurse Mother, A Pair Of Junior Swiss Army Knives, Born To Multitask.

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More From Elizabeth Gilbert

If You're Alive, You're A Creative Person.

I Worked At The Original Coyote Ugly Bar When I Was A Young, Unpublished Writer. Then Later When I Became A Writer, I Wrote An Article About It For Gq. Disney Read This Article About This Filthy, Disgusting Pit In The East Village [of New York City], Where We Used To Set The Bar On Fire To Get Customers Away From Us, And Said, "that's A Great Movie For Kids!" They Made The Fantastic Coyote Ugly Movie, Now Legendary.

I Don't Think You Can Come Into Your Wisdom Until You Have Made Mistakes On Your Own Skin And Felt Them In Reality Of Your Own Life.

There’s A Crack (or Cracks) In Everyone…that’s How The Light Of God Gets In.

What I Object To Is The Hyper-fetishized Wedding Day, The Prioritizing Of Wedding Over Marriage. I Have A Real Problem With Couples Spending Far More Time Discussing The Seating Arrangement Or The Color Of The Bridesmaid's Gowns Than Hashing Out, For Instance, Their Feelings About How They Intend To Handle Questions Of Housework, Child-rearing, Finances And Fidelity For The Next Four Or Five Decades.

Until-as Often Happened During Those First Months Travel, Whenever I Would Feel Such Happiness-my Guilt Alarm Went Off. I Heard My Ex-husband's Voice Speaking Disdainfully In My Ear: So This Is What You Gave Up Everything For? This Is Why You Gutted Our Entire Life Together? For A Few Stalks Of Asparagus And An Italian Newspaper? I Replied Aloud To Him: "first Of All," I Said, "i'm Very Sorry, But This Isn't Your Business Anymore. And Secondly, To Answer You Question...yes.

Every Try To Take A Toy Away From A Toddler? They Don't Like That, Do They? They Start Kicking And Screaming. Best Way To Take A Toy Away From A Toddler Is Distract The Kid, Give Him Something Else To Play With. Instead Of Trying To Forcefully Take Thoughts Out Of Your Mind, Give Your Mind Something Better To Play With.

Meditation Vs Prayer = Listening Vs Talking

Devotion Is Diligence Without Assurance. Faith Is A Way Of Saying "yes, I Pre-accept The Terms Of The Universe And I Embrace In Advance What I Am Presently Incapable Of Understanding.

I Was A Writer Before 'eat, Pray, Love,' And I'll Be A Writer After It's Over. It's What I Want To Do For The Rest Of My Life.

This Person Had Arrived, He Had Illuminated Her, He Had Ensorcelled Her With Notions Of Miracle And Beauty, He Had Both Understood And Misunderstood Her, He Had Married Her, He Had Broken Her Heart, He Had Looked Upon Her With Those Sad And Hopeless Eyes, He Had Accepted His Banishment, And Now He Was Gone. What A Stark And Stunning Thing Was Life- That Such A Cataclysm Can Enter And Depart So Quickly, And Leave Such Wreckage Behind!

Every Word Was A Singing Sparrow, A Magic Trick, A Truffle For Me. The Words Made Me Laugh In Delight.

You Know, I Think That Allowing Somebody, One Mere Person To Believe That He Or She Is Like, The Vessel You Know, Like The Font And The Essence And The Source Of All Divine, Creative, Unknowable, Eternal Mystery Is Just A Smidge Too Much Responsibility To Put On One Fragile, Human Psyche. It's Like Asking Somebody To Swallow The Sun.

He Was Powerful And I Died Of Love In His Shadow.

There Is A Level Of Grief So Deep That It Stops Resembling Grief At All. The Pain Becomes So Severe That The Body Can No Longer Feel It. The Grief Cauterizes Itself, Scars Over, Prevents Inflated Feeling. Such Numbness Is A Kind Of Mercy.

But Never Again Use Another Person's Body Or Emotions As A Scratching Post For Your Own Unfulfilling Yearnings.

Maybe It's Just Me But I Would Suspect That A Man Trying To Impress A Woman Would Be More Likely To Bring Out The Steak - "i Killed This For You, Now I'm Grilling It For You."

The Mosquitoes Here Are Big Enough To Rape A Chicken.

The Thing That I Do Try To Convey Is, Don't Do What I Did - But Ask What I Asked.

Clearing Out All Your Misery Gets You Out Of The Way. You Cease Being An Obstacle, Not Only To Yourself But To Anyone Else. Only Then Are You Free To Serve And Enjoy Other People.

One Must Always Be Prepared For Riotous And Endless Waves Of Transformation.

Unfenced By Law, The Unmarried Lover Can Quit A Bad Relationship At Any Time. But You - The Legally Married Person Who Wants To Escape Doomed Love - May Soon Discover That A Significant Portion Of Your Marriage Contract Belongs To The State, And That It Sometimes Takes A Very Long While For The State To Grant You Your Leave.

Bad Relationship

I Guess What I Want To Learn Is How To Live In This World And Enjoy Its Delights But Also Devote Myself To God.

Before You Realize This Truth, Say The Yogis, You Will Always Be In Despair, A Notion Nicely Expressed In This Exasperated Line From The Greek Stoic Philosopher Epictetus: 'you Bear God Within You, Poor Wretch, And Know It Not.

The More Exquisitely And Delightfully You Can Do Nothing, The Higher Your Life's Achievement.

Bali Eat Pray Love

Our Relationship Now Thoroughly Ruined, With Even Civility Destroyed Between Us, All I Wanted Anymore Was The Door.

Our Relationship

As A Writer, You Always Read In Two Minds: You Read As A Reader And You Enjoy It, And You Look At It As A Writer, And You Just Admire The Architecture And The Construction.

Man Is A Demon, Man Is A God. Both True.

The Reality, Certainly In My Life, Is That We All Have Love Stories That Go Terribly Wrong; We All Have Horribly Broken Hearts. And Somehow We Endure. We're Not Destroyed By It.

Someday You're Gonna Look Back On This Moment Of Your Life As Such A Sweet Time Of Grieving. You'll See That You Were In Mourning And Your Heart Was Broken, But Your Life Was Changing.

I Should Just Put It Bluntly, Because We're All Sort Of Friends Here Now - It's Exceedingly Likely That My Greatest Success Is Behind Me. Oh, So Jesus, What A Thought! You Know That's The Kind Of Thought That Could Lead A Person To Start Drinking Gin At Nine O'clock In The Morning, And I Don't Want To Go There.

I've Been Screwed And Sued And Tattooed, And I'm Still Standin' Here In Front Of You.

Marriage Is Not Simply A Romantic Union Between Two People; It's Also A Political And Economic Contract Of The Highest Order.

In Every Possible Instance Saint Paul Begged Christians To Restrain Themselves To Contain Their Carnal Yearnings To Live Solitary And Sexless Lives On Earth As It Is In Heaven. "but If They Cannot Contain " Paul Finally Conceded Then "let Them Marry For It Is Better To Marry Than To Burn." Which Is Perhaps The Most Begrudging Endorsement Of Matrimony In Human History.

He Told Me That One Of The Reasons People Are So Unhappy Is They Don't Talk To Themselves. He Said You Have To Keep A Conversation Going With Yourself Throughout Your Life To See How You're Doing, To Keep Your Focus, To Remain Your Own Friend. He Told Me That He Talked To Himself All The Time, And That It Helped Him To Grow Stronger And Better Everyday.

It Was Like Time Would Stop, And The Dancer Would Sort Of Step Through Some Kind Of Portal And He Wasn't Doing Anything Different Than He Had Ever Done, 1,000 Nights Before, But Everything Would Align. And All Of A Sudden, He Would No Longer Appear To Be Merely Human. He Would Be Lit From Within, And Lit From Below And All Lit Up On Fire With Divinity. And When This Happened, Back Then, People Knew It For What It Was, You Know, They Called It By It's Name. They Would Put Their Hands Together And They Would Start To Chant, "allah, Allah, Allah, God God, God." That's God, You Know.

Well, I Always Tried To Look Nice And Be Feminine Even In The Worst Tragedies And Crisis, There's No Reason To Add To Everyone's Misery By Looking Miserable Yourself. That's My Philosophy. This Is Why I Always Wore Makeup And Jewelry Into The Jungle-nothing Too Extravagant, But Maybe Just A Nice Gold Bracelet And Some Earrings, A Little Lipstick, Good Perfume. Just Enough To Show That I Still Had My Self-respect.

Then Again, You Cannot Stop The Flood Of Desire As It Moves Through The World, Inappropriate Though It May Sometimes Be. It Is The Prerogative Of All Humans To Make Ludicrous Choices, To Fall In Love With The Most Unlikely Of Partners, And To Set Themselves Up For The Most Predicatable Of Calamities.

Falling In Love

Infatuation Is Not Quite The Same Thing As Love; It's More Like Love's Shady Second Cousin Who's Always Borrowing Money And Can't Hold Down A Job.

Astonishingly, At Some Point, A Sputtering Torch Was Thrust Into Her Hands. Alma Did Not See Who Gave It To Her. She Had Never Before Been Entrusted With Fire. The Torch Spit Sparks And Sent Chunks Of Flaming Tar Spinning Into The Air Behind Her As She Bolted Across The Cosmos-the Only Body In The Heavens Who Was Not Held To A Strict Elliptical Path. Nobody Stopped Her. She Was A Comet. She Did Not Know That She Was Not Flying.

A Woman's Place Is In The Kitchen...sitting In A Comfortable Chair, With Her Feet Up, Drinking A Glass Of Wine And Watching Her Husband Cook Dinner.

Happiness Is The Consequence Of Personal Effort. You Fight For It, Strive For It, Insist Upon It, And Sometimes Even Travel Around The World Looking For It. You Have To Participate Relentlessly In The Manifestations Of Your Own Blessings. And Once You Have Achieved A State Of Happiness, You Must Never Become Lax About Maintaining It. You Must Make A Mighty Effort To Keep Swimming Upward Into That Happiness Forever, To Stay Afloat On Top Of It.

Deep Grief Sometimes Is Almost Like A Specific Location, A Coordinate On A Map Of Time. When You Are Standing In That Forest Of Sorrow, You Cannot Imagine That You Could Ever Find Your Way To A Better Place. But If Someone Can Assure You That They Themselves Have Stood In That Same Place, And Now Have Moved On, Sometimes This Will Bring Hope

The Love That Moves The Sun And The Other Stars.

In The End, Though, Maybe We Must All Give Up Trying To Pay Back The People In This World Who Sustain Our Lives. In The End, Maybe It's Wiser To Surrender Before The Miraculous Scope Of Human Generosity And To Just Keep Saying Thank You, Forever And Sincerely, For As Long As We Have Voices.

If I'd Had Any Way Of Knowing That Things Were- As Lily Tomlin Once Said- Going To Get A Whole Lot Worse Before They Got Worse, I'm Not Sure How I Would Have Slept That Night.

What Are You Willing To Give Up, In Order To Become Who You Really Need To Be?

Creativity Itself Doesn't Care At All About Results - The Only Thing It Craves Is The Process. Learn To Love The Process And Let Whatever Happens Next Happen, Without Fussing Too Much About It. Work Like A Monk, Or A Mule, Or Some Other Representative Metaphor For Diligence. Love The Work. Destiny Will Do What It Wants With You, Regardless.

That Is Who Barack Obama Is - A Person Of Admirable Character - And That Is Who He Has Remained For Me Over These Last Four Years. I Have Not Agreed With His Every Decision, But Never Once Have I Seen Him Break His Cool, Lose His Composure, Or Abandon His Insightful Perspective - Even During The Most Serious And/or Absurd National Disasters.

I Think It's Wonderful When A Love Story Begins With A Great Deal Of Romance And Affection, Passion And Excitement, That's How It Should Be. But I Don't Necessarily Know That It's The Wisest Thing In The World To Expect That It Ends There, Or That It Should, 30 Years Down The Road, Still Look As It Did On The Night Of Your First Kiss.

Traveling Is The Great True Love Of My Life

Love Of My Life

Great True Love

Given That Life Is So Short, Do I Really Want To Spend One-ninetieth Of My Remaining Days On Earth Reading Edward Gibbon?

A True Soul Mate Is Probably The Most Important Person You'll Ever Meet, Because They Tear Down Your Walls And Smack You Awake. But To Live With A Soul Mate Forever? Nah. Too Painful. Soul Mates, They Come Into Your Life Just To Reveal Another Layer Of Yourself To You, And Then Leave.

Everything Was A Miracle Until We Solved It. ... The First Man Who Ever Saw A Flying Fish Probably Thought He Was Witnessing A Miracle - And The First Man Who Ever Described A Flying Fish Was Doubtless Called A Liar.

At Some Point, You Gotta Let Go, And Sit Still, And Allow Contentment To Come To You.

I Have A Lot Of Trouble Forgiving Myself For Being So Dumb... But Yes, Of Course, The Big Generous Compassionate View That You Should Take Of Yourself And Of All Events Is: What A Glorious Circus Train This Has Been, And What A Wonderful Messy Parade, And All Of Those Steps Took Me Here, Where I Precisely Need To Be Now, So God Bless It.

[my Friend And I] Decided, We'll Go To Corsicana, And We'll See What The People In Corsicana Say. ... We Just Started Meeting People And Talking To Them, And The More I Heard The Stories, The More Red Flags Kept Popping Up. There Was This Disconnect Between This Person [todd Willingham] That I'm Reading In The Court Records, The Prosecutor's Statements, And This Person That I'm Learning About.

Well, Just Remember--all Your Misery Will Be Waiting For You At The Door Upon Your Exit, Should You Care To Pick It Up Again When You Leave.

Traveling-to-a-place Energy And Living-in-a-place Energy Are Two Fundamentally Different Energies

I Want God To Play In My Bloodstream The Way Sunlight Amuses Itself On The Water.

I See Women Who Have This Struggle Between What They Know Is Right, What They Know Is Necessary, What They Know Is Healthy, What They Know Is Good For Them, What They Know Is Good For The Work That They Need To Do, What They Know Is Good For Their Bodies, What They Know Is Good For Their Families - All Too Often Ending That Statement With The Upturned Question Mark: "if It's Okay With Everyone?" Still Asking, Still Requesting, Still Filing Petitions For Somebody To Say That It's All Right.

I Was Perfectly Happy In My Boring Life Before You Came Along.

There Are Always Two Figures In A Marriage, Two Votes, Two Conflicting Sets Of Decisions, Desires And Limitations.

Your Father Only Has One Foot On This Earth. And Really, Really Long Legs . . .

We All Want Things To Stay The Same. Settle For Living In Misery Because We Are Afraid Of Change, Of Things Crumbling To Ruins. Ruin Is A Gift. Ruin Is The Road To Transformation.

Yoga Is The Effort To Experience One's Divinity Personally And Then To Hold On To That Experience Forever.

The Ingredients Of Both Darkness And Light Are Equally Present In All Of Us,...the Madness Of This Planet Is Largely A Result Of The Human Being's Difficulty In Coming To Viruous Balance With Himself.

We Must Take Care Of Our Families Wherever We Find Them.

I Wonder If I Am Capable Of Being Somebody’s Sun, Somebody’s Everything. Am I Centered Enough Now To Be The Center Of Somebody Else’s Life?

Learning How To Discipline Your Speech Is A Way Of Preventing Your Energies From Spilling Out Of You Through The Rupture Of Your Mouth, Exhausting You And Filling The World With Words, Words, Words Instead Of Serenity, Peace And Bliss.

Whatever This Feeling Is - This Is What I Have Been Praying For. And This Is Also What I Have Been Praying To.

Every Intimacy Carries Secreted Somewhere Below Its Initial Lovely Surfaces, The Ever-coiled Makings Of Complete Catastrophe.

Your Emotions Are The Slaves To Your Thoughts, And You Are The Slave To Your Emotions.

Marriage Becomes Hard Work Once You Have Poured The Entirety Of Your Life’s Expectations For Happiness Into The Hands Of One Mere Person. Keeping That Going Is Hard Work.

I Think That If You Can Roast A Chicken, You Can Get Whatever You Want Out Of A Woman.

Here In America, Marriage Still Has A Mystical, Intangible Power: It Is A Passport To Adulthood And Respectability And To A Certain Extent Citizenship. Any Relationship Less Than "married" Is Considered Temporary And Not Worthy Of Honor.

The Trick At Every Turn Was To Endure The Test Of Living For As Long As Possible. The Odds Of Survival Were Punishingly Slim, For The World Was Naught By A School Of Calamity And An Endless Burning Furnace Of Tribulation. But Those Who Survived The World Shaped It--even As The World, Simultaneously, Shaped Them.

Now Imagine A Life In Which Every Day A Person Is Presented With Not Two Or Even Three But Dozens Of Choices, And You Can Begin To Grasp Why The Modern World Has Become, Even With All Its Advantages, A Neurosis-generating Machine Of The Highest Order.

I Am Determined To Make The Most Of This Life That I Have, Damn It - It's That Kind Of Stubbornness I Think We All Need More Of.

There's A Wonderful Old Italian Joke About A Poor Man Who Goes To Church Every Day And Prays Before The Statue Of A Great Saint,'dear Saint-please, Please, Please...give Me The Grace To Win The Lottery.' This Lament Goes On For Months. Finally The Exasperated Statue Come To Life, Looks Down At The Begging Man And Says In Weary Disgust,'my Son-please, Please, Please...buy A Ticket.

There Is Hardly A More Gracious Gift That We Can Offer Somebody Than To Accept Them Fully, To Love Them Almost Despite Themselves.

Only The Young And Stupid Are Confident About Sex And Romance.

We Alter And Customize The Thing Every Century, Every Generation, Every Day - Both In The Courts And In Our Own Homes. And Marriage Accepts Our Modifications Gracefully. Marriage Adapts, Evolves And (in A Manner That I Find Miraculous And Kind Of Inspiring) Somehow Keeps Chugging Along.

The Six Elements Of Her Fail Proof Broken-heart Curing Treatment: "vitamin E, Get Much Sleep, Drink Much Water, Travel To A Place Far Away From The Person You Loved, Meditate And Teach Your Heart That This Is Destiny.

Teach Your Heart That This Is Destiny

This Is What Rituals Are For. We Do Spiritual Ceremonies As Human Beings In Order To Create A Safe Resting Place For Our Most Complicated Feelings Of Joy Or Trauma, So That We Don't Have To Haul Those Feelings Around With Us Forever, Weighing Us Down. We All Need Such Places Of Ritual Safekeeping. And I Do Believe That If Your Culture Or Tradition Doesn't Have The Specific Ritual You Are Craving, Then You Are Absolutely Permitted To Make Up A Ceremony Of Your Own Devising, Fixing Your Own Broken-down Emotional Systems With All The Do-it-yourself Resourcefulness Of A Generous Plumber/poet.

When The Karma Of A Relationship Is Done, Only Love Remains. It's Safe. Let Go.

Problem Is, You Can’t Accept That His Relationship Had A Real Short Shelf Life. You’re Like A Dog At The Dump, Baby – You’re Just Lickin’ At The Empty Tin Can, Trying To Get More Nutrition Out Of It. And If You’re Not Careful, That Can’s Gonna Get Stuck On Your Snout Forever And Make Your Life Miserable. So Drop It.” “but I Love Him.” “so Love Him.” “but I Miss Him.” “so Miss Him. Send Him Some Love And Light Every Time You Think About Him, Then Drop It.

Guilt's Just Your Ego's Way Of Tricking You Into Thinking That You're Making Moral Progress. Don't Fall For It, My Dear.

God Isn't Interested In Watching You Enact Some Performance Of Personality In Order To Comply With Some Crackpot Notion You Have About How A Spiritual Person Looks Or Behaves. We All Seem To Get This Idea That, In Order To Be Sacred, We Have To Make Some Massive, Dramatic Change Of Character, That We Have To Renounce Our Individuality.

I Know This Simple Fact To Be True, For I Myself Have Abandoned People Who Did Not Want Me To Go, And I Myself Have Been Abandoned By Those Whom I Begged To Stay.

True Wisdom Gives The Only Possible Answer At Any Given Moment, And That Night, Going Back To Bed Was The Only Possible Answer.

Life's Metaphors Are God's Instructions.

I Think A Lot Of People Who Feel As Though They Desperately Want To Be Married Oftentimes Simply Desperately Want To Have A Wedding.

They Say That There Are Three Kinds Of People In The World. There Are People Who Never Learn One Way Or Another Anything; There Are People Who Learn From Their Own Mistakes, Eventually And With Great Pain; And Then There Are The Really Wise People Who Learn From Other People's Mistakes And Spare Themselves The Suffering.

I Love My Pizza So Much, In Fact, That I Have Come To Believe In My Delirium That My Pizza Might Actually Love Me, In Return. I Am Having A Relationship With This Pizza, Almost An Affair.

Ketut, Why Is Life All Crazy Like This?" I Asked My Medicine Man The Next Day...so What Can We Do About The Craziness Of The World?" Nothing." Ketut Laughed, But With A Dose Of Kindness. "this Is Nature Of World. This Is Destiny. Worry About Your Craziness Only-make You In Peace.

I Feel Like There Are Women Who Are Genuinely Born To Be Mothers, And Women Who Are Born To Be Aunties, And Women Who Really Probably Not Should Be Allowed Near Children. The Tragedy That Happens Is When Any One Of Those Women Ends Up In The Wrong Category.

I Actually Have A Great Deal Of Respect For Antidepressants; I Think They Can Be Enormously Mighty Tools Toward Recovery.

Happiness Is The Consequence Of Personal Effort. You Must Fight For It, Strive For It, And Insist Upon It.

Todd's Mother Had Several Children By Different Fathers, And Todd [willingham] Had Been Abandoned In California. ... He's A Good-looking Man. He Was A Witty Man, You Know? Funny, Caring. He Wasn't Arrogant, But He Was Kind Of Set In His Ways. If He Thought Something, It Was One Way. You Could Show Him An Alternative, But He Was Still Going To Stick By His Particular View. But I Could See How To Women He Could Be A Very Charming, Good-looking Guy, Especially When He Was Younger.

Venice Is Beautiful, But Like A Bergman Movie Is Beautiful; You Can Admire It, But You Don't Really Want To Live In It.

My Life's Accomplishments? Sanity, And You.

And When You Sense A Faint Potentiality For Happiness After Such Dark Times You Must Grab Onto The Ankles Of That Happiness And Not Let Go Until It Drags You Face-first Out Of The Dirt - This Is Not Selfishness, But Obligation. You Were Given Life; It Is Your Duty To Find Something Beautiful Within Life No Matter How Slight.

From The Most Sacred Ancient Text Of Yoga: Oh Krishna, The Mind Is Restless, Turbulent, Strong, And Unyielding. I Consider It As Difficult To Subdue As The Wind.

But Vegetarians Can Eat This...because Intestines Aren't Even Meat, Liz. They're Just Sh$*.

You Must Stop Looking At The World Through Your Head. You Must Look Through Your Heart, Instead.

I Want To Explore The Art Of Pleasure In Italy, The Art Of Devotion In India And, In Indonesia, The Art Of Balancing The Two. It Was Only Later, After Admitting This Dream, That I Noticed The Happy Coincidence That All These Countries Begin With The Letter I. A Fairly Auspicious Sign, It Seemed, On A Voyage Of Self-discovery.

Om Namah Shivaya, Meaning, I Honor The Divinity That Resides Within Me.

If You're Going To Answer The Call And You're Going To Transform And You're Going To Change, Get Ready. It Is Not A Day At The Beach.

I Know What It Feels Like To Be Bruised; I Know What It Feels Like To Carry Things Around With You That Never Totally Heal. There's Closure And Then There's Stuff That's Kind Of Like, Well, I Guess It's Going To Be In The Minivan Forever. And You Carry It With You And You Continue On Your Journey With Your Minivan Full Of Stuff, Which I Think Most Of Us Do.

You Never Know How A Good Quest Is Going To End.

I Believe That - If You Are Serious About A Life Of Writing, Or Indeed About Any Creative Form Of Expression - That You Should Take On This Work Like A Holy Calling.

Of Course, We All Inevitably Work Too Hard, Then We Get Burned Out And Have To Spend The Whole Weekend In Our Pajamas, Eating Cereal Straight Out Of The Box And Staring At The Tv In A Mild Coma (which Is The Opposite Of Working, Yes, But Not Exactly The Same Thing As Pleasure).

My Mother Has Made Choices In Her Life, As We All Must, And She Is At Peace With Them. I Can See Her Peace. She Did Not Cop Out On Herself. The Benefits Of Her Choices Are Massive-a Long, Stable Marriage To A Man She Still Calls Her Best Friend; A Family That Has Extended Now Into Grandchildren Who Adore Her; A Certainty In Her Own Strength. Maybe Some Things Were Sacrificed, And My Dad Made His Sacrifices, Too-but Who Amongst Us Lives Without Sacrifice?

Addiction Is The Hallmark Of Every Infatuation-based Love Story.

Just Having Walked Into A Prison Environment, Sat There For Two Hours, The Effect That It Had On Me. ... I Couldn't Imagine The Effect It Would Have On A Person 24 Hours A Day. So Then I Became More Intrigued, And We Began A Correspondence, And I Began Visiting [todd Willingham].

When I Tried This Morning, After An Hour Or So Of Unhappy Thinking, To Dip Back Into My Meditation, I Took A New Idea With Me: Compassion. I Asked My Heart If It Could Please Infuse My Soul With A More Generous Perspective On My Mind's Workings. Instead Of Thinking That I Was A Failure, Could I Perhaps Accept That I Am Only A Human Being--and A Normal One, At That?

Admittedly, I Am Not The One Who Looks Fantastic In Everything, But Still I Cannot Help Loving Myself.

So Now I Have Started Living My Own Life. Imperfect And Clumsy As It May Look, It Is Resembling Me Now, Thoroughly.

But Is It Such A Bad Thing To Live Like This For Just A Little While? Just For A Few Months Of One's Life, Is It So Awful To Travel Through Time With No Greater Ambition Than To Find The Next Lovely Meal? Or To Learn How To Speak A Language For No Higher Purpose Than That It Pleases Your Ear To Hear It? Or To Nap In A Garden, In A Patch Of Sunlight, In The Middle Of The Day, Right Next To Your Favourite Fountain? And Then To Do It Again The Next Day?

If Todd [willingham] Was Guilty Of Anything, It Was Just His Self-preservation. He Got Up And Ran Out Of The House And Then Thought About The Children After The Fact.

I Feel Like All This Stuff That We Make: Books And Art And Music, All Of It. There's This Energy That Circles The World That Wants To Be Made Manifest, And It Is Just Looking For Someone To Come Through. And It's Dying For You To Make It. And If You Don't Do It, It Will Go Find Somebody Else.

I Can Honestly Say [that Writing] Is The Best Life There Is, Because You Get To Live Within The Realm Of Your Own Mind, And That Is A Profoundly Rare Human Privilege.

Power Is A Neutral Energy Source, Like Tofu. It's What You Do With It That Gives It Flavor.

The Search For God Is A Reversal Of The Normal, Mundane Worldly Order. In Search For God, You Revert From What Attracts You And Swim Toward That Which Is Difficult. You Abandon Your Comforting And Familiar Habits With The Hope (the Mere Hope!) That Something Greater Will Be Offered You In Return For What You Have Given Up.. If We Truly Knew All The Answers In Advance As To The Meaning Of Life And The Nature Of God And The Destiny Of Our Souls, Our Belief Would Not Be A Leap Of Faith And It Would Not Be A Courageous Act Of Humanity; It Would Just Be.. A Prudent Insurance Policy.

I'm Not A Big Austen Reader. I Wouldn't Say I Dislike Her, But If I Had To Choose Between Her And Eliot To Bring To A Desert Island, It Would Definitely Be Eliot.

Marriage Is - Among Other Things - A Study In Contradiction And Disappointment, And Inside That Reality There Is Space For Us To Truly Learn How To Love.

Please Go To This Pizzeria. Order The Margherita Pizza With Double Mozzarella. If You Do Not Eat This Pizza When You Are In Naples, Please Lie To Me And Tell Me That You Did.

I Love My Friends And Family, But I Also Love It When They Can't Find Me And I Can Spend All Day Reading Or Walking All Alone, In Silence, Eight Thousand Miles Away From Everyone. All Alone And Unreachable In A Foreign Country Is One My Most Favorite Possible Things To Be.

I Have Far More Enthusiasm In Life Than I Have Actual Energy. In My Excitement, I Routinely Take On More That I Can Physically Or Emotionally Handle, Which Causes Me To Break Down In Quite Predictable Displays Of Dramatic Exhaustion. You Will Be The One Burdened With The Job Of Mopping Me Up Every Time I've Overextended Myself And Then Fallen Apart. This Will Be Unbelievably Tedious. I Apologize In Advance.

We Set Up One Rule In Our House, Which Is, 'guests Of Guests Cannot Bring Guests.' That Rule Was Required Because That Happened One Weekend, And We Finally Said, 'okay, You Know What? That's A Little Too Much.'

We All Have Love Stories That Go Terribly Wrong; We All Have Horribly Broken Hearts. And Somehow We Endure. We're Not Destroyed By It. We Endure And Go On To Do Interesting Things And Have Worthy Lives, Even Though We Carry Our Heartbreaks With Us. That's A Kind Of Personal Story Of Mine That I Don't Think I Would Tell In Memoir But I Do Think I Can Tell In Fiction.

Modern Marriage Is First And Foremost A Romantic And Private Union, But The Tax Laws And Inheritance Laws And Religious Implications That Still Surround This Institution Indicate That Marriage Has Evolved Without Casting Away Its Earlier Purposes Or Assumptions. It's Like We Just Keep Building On This Thing, Piling New Advancements On The Old Model.

In Order For Marriage To Endure It Has To Change Along With Us, And It Does That Very Graciously. And In The End I Find There Is Something Kind Of Moving About It: The Fact That People Continue To Insist On Choosing Somebody To Build A Life With.

So I Stood Up And Did A Handstand On My Guru's Roof, To Celebrate The Notion Of Liberation. I Felt The Dusty Tiles Under My Hands. I Felt My Own Strength And Balance. I Felt The Easy Night Breeze On The Palms Of My Bare Feet. This Kind Of Thing -- A Spontaneous Handstand--isn't Something A Disembodied Cool Blue Soul Can Do, But A Human Being Can Do It. We Have Hands; We Can Stand On Them If We Want To. That's Our Privilege. That's The Joy Of A Mortal Body. And That's Why God Needs Us. Because God Loves To Feel Things Through Our Hands.

I'm An Enormous Product Of My Century, I'm A Product Of My Upbringing. I Was Not Aware Of The Fact That I Was Entering Marriage With The Highest Set Of Expectations That Humans Have Ever Brought To The Institution. It Was Really Good To Find That Out. It Doesn't Have To Be The Alpha And The Omega, The Beginning And The End, The Moon And The Stars - It Can Just Be The Moon. It's Enough That It Just Can Be What It Is.

[saint Anthony] Said, In His Solitude, He Sometimes Encountered Devils Who Looked Like Angels, And Other Times He Found Angels Who Looked Like Devils. When Asked How He Could Tell The Difference, The Saint Said That You Can Only Tell Which Is Which By The Way You Feel After The Creature Has Left Your Company.

Love Renders All Of Our Plans And All Of Our Hopes A Gamble.

Why They Always Look So Serious In Yoga? You Make Serious Face Like This, You Scare Away Good Energy. To Meditate, Only You Must Smile. Smile With Face, Smile With Mind, And Good Energy Will Come To You And Clean Away Dirty Energy. Even Smile In Your Liver. Practice Tonight At Hotel. Not To Hurry, Not To Try Too Hard. Too Serious, You Make You Sick. You Can Calling The Good Energy With A Smile. (from Ketut Liyer, The Balinese Healer)

My Husband Is Not American. He Was Born In Brazil, Where He Grew Up Under A Filthy, Corrupt Dictatorship. In His Twenties, He Moved To Europe, Where He Lived For A While Under Various Socialist Democracies. He Spent A Few Years On A Kibbutz In Israel, Living Out A Utopian Experiment In Communal Existence.

To Lose Balance Sometimes For Love Is Part Of Living A Balanced Life.

My Face Is A Transparent Transmitter Of My Every Thought.

This Is What Intimacy Does To Us Over Time. That's What A Long Marriage Can Do: It Causes Us To Inherit And Trade Each Other's Stories. (p.237)

I Equal Parts Loved Him And Could Not Stand Him. I Couldn't Wake Him To Share In My Distress.

Sometimes Life Is Too Hard To Be Alone, And Sometimes Life Is Too Good To Be Alone.

God Wants Us To Be In Joy, God Wants Us To Be Happy. Because Of This Extraordinary Consciousness And This Great Ability For Wonder And Marvel, And Without Denying Any Of The Terrors And Horrors Of The World, We Also Have An Obligation Toward Joy And Toward Miracle And Excitement.

All The Parts Of Us That We Ever Were Are Always Going To Be With Us. You Make Space To Carry Them And You Just Try Not To Let Them Drive. But You Can't Chuck Them Out Either.

Real, Sane, Mature Love—the Kind That Pays The Mortgage Year After Year And Picks Up The Kids After School—is Not Based On Infatuation But On Affection And Respect.

The Appreciation Of Pleasure Can Be The Anchor Of Humanity.

This Is Intimacy: The Trading Of Stories In The Dark.

Thich Nhat Hanh Has The Ability To Bring Forth The State Of Peace That We Each Inherently Posses Merely By His Presence In A Room-this Is Divine Power.

Why Must Everything Be Repeat And Repeat, Never Finish, Never Resting? You Work So Hard One Day, But The Next Day You Must Only Work Again. You Eat, But The Next Day, You Are Already Hungry. You Find Love, Then Love Goes Away. You Are Born With Nothing, You Work Hard, Then You Die With Nothing. You Are Young, Then You Are Old. No Matter How Hard You Work, You Cannot Stop Getting Old. - Wayan

Do You Think There's Any Way Humans Can Love Each Other Without Complication?

Marriage Is An Ongoing, Centuries-long Social Experiment That Is Mostly Controlled By The Individuals In The Relationships Who Insist On Determining What The Relationship Terms Are Going To Be. And That's Why The Terms Of Marriage Change With Every Century And Decade. We're Shaping It From The Inside. Marriage Endures Because It Evolves. Obviously It Does. None Of Us Would Accept Marriage On Its 13th Century Terms, Not Even The Most Conservative People...

You Know The Old Adage: Plant An Expectation, Reap A Disappointment.

We’re Miserable Because We Think That We Are Mere Individuals, Alone With Our Fears And Flaws And Resentments And Mortality. We Wrongly Believe That Our Limited Little Egos Constitute Our Whole Entire Nature. We Have Failed To Recognize Our Deeper Divine Character.

Nothing Is Less Efficient Than Perfectionism.

Because I Know Something That You Don't Know. I Know That This Is The Worst Experience Of Your Life, But I Also Know That Someday You'll Move Past It And You'll Be Fine. And Helping Somebody Likej You Through The Worst Experience Of Her Life Is Incredibly Gratifying.

So Miss Him. Send Him Some Love And Light Every Time You Think About Him, Then Drop It.

Watch For The People Whose Eyes Light Up When You Talk About Your Dream. Those Are The People You Keep.

Oh, Cold World -- I Have Grown So Weary Of You And All Your Horrible Bathrooms.

People Will Always Want Intimacy With One Chosen Person And You Cannot Have Intimacy Without Privacy, Which Is Why Couples Draw Circles Of Privacy Around Themselves. They Demand That Family, Neighbors And The Law Respect Their Union, And That Is Why We Have Marriage.

Bhuta Ia, Dewa Ia. (bali Expression Meaning Man Is A Demon, Man Is A God.)

Kalos Kai Agathos, The Singular Balance Of The Good And The Beautiful.

You Were Given Life; It Is Your Duty (and Also Your Entitlement As A Human Being) To Find Something Beautiful Within Life, No Matter How Slight.

When The Past Has Passed From You At Last, Let Go. Then Climb Down And Begin The Rest Of Your Life. With Great Joy.

But At Some Point You Have To Make Peace With What You Were Given And If God Wanted Me To Be A Shy Girl With Think, Dark Hair, He Would Have Made Me That Way, But He Didn't. Useful, Then, Might Be To Accept How I Was Made And Embody Myself Fully Therein.

Mostly You Meet Friends When Traveling By Accident, Like By Sitting Next To Them On The Train, Or In A Restaurant, Or In A Holding Cell.

I'm A Pleaser. That's My Character.

The Augusteum Warns Me Not To Get Attached To Any Obsolete Ideas About Who I Am, What I Represent, Whom I Belong To, Or What Function I May Once Have Intended To Serve.

I Will Not Harbor Unhealthy Thoughts Anymore.

Travel Is Similar To Therapy. You Can Go To The Best Psychologist In The World For Ten Years. If You Don't Feel Like Actively Shifting Anything In Your Life, There Is Nothing That Person Can Do To Change You.

The World Needs Women Who Stop Asking For Permission From The Principal. Permission To Live Their Lives As They Deeply Know They Often Should. I Think We Still Look To Authority Figures For Validation, Recognition, Permission.

Dear Me, How I Love A Library.

My Restlessness Makes Me A Far Better Day-to-day Traveler Than He Will Ever Be. I Am Infinitely Curious And Almost Infinitely Patient With Mishaps, Discomforts, And Minor Disasters. So I Can Go Anywhere On The Planet—that’s Not A Problem. The Problem Is That I Just Can’t Live Anywhere On The Planet.

As Smoking Is To The Lungs, So Is Resentment To The Soul; Even One Puff Is Bad For You.

The Beauty Of Doing Nothing

We Can Change Our Wives,” He Said. “we Can Change Our Jobs, Our Nationalities And Even Our Religions, But We Can Never Change Our Team.

I Spent A Week Living As A Man. Which Was Actually, I'm Sorry To Say, Embarrassingly Easy For Me To Do.

Liz, You Must Be Very Polite With Yourself When You Are Learning Something New.

Learning Something New

What If We Just Acknowledged That We Have A Bad Relationship, And We Stuck It Out, Anyway? What If We Admitted That We Make Each Other Nuts, We Fight Constantly And Hardly Ever Have Sex, But We Can't Live Without Each Other, So We Deal With It? And Then We Could Spend Our Lives Together - In Misery, But Happy To Not Be Apart.

Bad Relationship

This Was Not My Moment To Be Seeking Romance And (as Day Follows Night) To Further Complicate My Already Knotty Life. This Was My Moment To Look For The Kind Of Healing And Peace That Can Only Come From Solitude.

Too Many Maniacs Not Enough Michelangelos

Even In The Worst Tragedies And Crisis, There’s No Reason To Add To Everyone’s Misery By Looking Miserable Yourself.

If You're Brave Enough To Leave Behind Everything Familiar And Comforting, Which Can Be Anything From Your House To Bitter, Old Resentments, And Set Out On A Truth-seeking Journey, Either Externally Or Internally, And If You Are Truly Willing To Regard Everything That Happens To You On That Journey As A Clue And If You Accept Everyone You Meet Along The Way As A Teacher And If You Are Prepared, Most Of All, To Face And Forgive Some Very Difficult Realities About Yourself, Then The Truth Will Not Be Withheld From You.

Tis' Better To Live Your Own Life Imperfectly Than To Imitate Someone Else's Perfectly.

Success Isn't About Acquiring Things, It's About Discovering Your Life Purpose And Following The Call

Acquiring Things

The Four Virtues A Person Needs In Order To Be Safe And Happy In Life: Intelligence, Friendship, Strength And (i Love This One) Poetry.

I Think It's Unfortunate That There Exists Only One Path In America To Complete Social Legitimacy, And That Is Marriage. I Think, For Instance, That It Would Be Far Easier For Americans To Elect A Black President Or A Female President Than An Unmarried President.

If Life Gives You Lemons, Don't Settle For Simply Making Lemonade - Make A Glorious Scene At A Lemonade Stand.

Nobody's Really Paying That Much Attention To Your Massive Personal Dramas.

As Far As We Know, We Are The Only Species On The Planet Who Have Been Given The Gift-or Curse, Perhaps-of Awareness About Our Own Mortality. Everything Here Eventually Dies; We're Just The Lucky Ones Who Get To Think About This Fact Every Day.

We Invented Marriage. Couples Invented Marriage. We Also Invented Divorce,mind You. And We Invented Infidelity,too, As Well As Romantic Misery. In Fact We Invented The Whole Sloppy Mess Of Love And Intimacy And Aversion And Euphoria And Failure. But Most Importantly Of All, Most Subversively Of All, Most Stubbornly Of All, We Invented Privacy.

We Live In This Society Where You Must Constantly Be Reinventing Yourself. The Big Question Is What Are You Doing Next. The Only Thing They Want Is Composed Of These Three Elements: They Want You To Do It The Exact Same Way Because They Want More Of It; But They Want It To Be Totally Different; And They Want It To Be Better. That's All You Have To Do. You Just Have To Do Something That's Exactly The Same, Totally Different, And Better.

I'm So Excited About School. I'm Such A Shameless Student. I Laid My Clothes Out Last Night, Just Like I Did Before My First Day Of First Grade, With My Patent Leather Shoes And My New Lunch Box. I Hope The Teacher Will Like Me :)

The Yogic Sages Say That All The Pain Of A Human Life Is Caused By Words, As Is All The Joy. We Create Words To Define Our Experience And Those Words Bring Attendant Emotions That Jerk Us Around Like Dogs On A Leash. We Get Seduced By Our Own Mantras (i'm A Failure I'm Lonely I'm A Failure I'm Lonely) And We Become Monuments To Them. To Stop Talking For A While, Then, Is To Attempt To Strip Away The Power Of Words, To Stop Choking Ourselves With Words, To Liberate Ourselves From Our Suffocating Mantras.

Maybe This Is Just Some Stupid Romantic South American Idea, But I Need You To Understand-darling, For You, I Am Even Willing To Suffer. Whatever Pain Happens To Us In The Future, I Accept It Already, Just For The Pleasure Of Being With You Now. Let's Enjoy This Time. It's Marvelous. Felipe-eat, Pray, Love

What Worked Yesterday Doesn't Always Work Today.

Bali Eat Pray Love

Your Home Is Whatever In This World You Love More Than You Love Yourself.

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