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We’re Built To Deal With Death, Disease, Failure, Struggle, Heartbreak, Problems. It’s What Separates Us From The Animals And Why We Envy And Love Animals So Much. We’re Aware Of It All And Have To Process It. The Way We Each Handle Being Human Is Where All The Good Stories, Jokes, Art, Wisdom, Revelations, And Bullshit Come From.

-Marc Maron

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We’re Built To Deal

Marc Maron

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We’re Built To Deal With Death, Disease, Failure, Struggle, Heartbreak, Problems. It’s What Separates Us From The Animals And Why We Envy And Love Animals So Much. We’re Aware Of It All And Have To Process It. The Way We Each Handle Being Human Is Where All The Good Stories, Jokes, Art, Wisdom, Revelations, And Bullshit Come From.

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That's An Animal Fable About Humility. If You Survive Your Mistake, You Must Learn From It. Accept That You're Fragile, Vulnerable, And Sometimes Stupid. Realize That You're Not Immortal And You've Got To Take Care Of Yourself. And Then Laugh It Off And Fly Away.

Once I Learned How To Talk, Personally, By Myself To Any Number Of People, Which Means Do Radio Without Talking To Anyone In Particular On The Air - I Just Found That My Brain Became Very Free To Engage In A Sort Of Stream-of-consciousness Style Of Doing What I Do.

I'm Not A Racist. It's Really Case By Case; It's Not Ethnicity Specific. It's Just The Way I React To Things That Are Different. I Think That's Normal. Everyone's Nervous When They're Confronted With Things That They Don't Understand Or Are Different. That's A Normal Human Reaction. It Doesn't Become Racist 'til You Say Things Like, 'oh, There's A Lot Of Them.'

Left Wing, Right Wing, I Am Wingless And Tired Of Trying To Fly. Here Comes The Ground.

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Comics Seemed To Have A Handle On Things. They Could Sort Of Disarm And Get Control Over Reality. I Found It Very Comforting To Laugh.

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I'm Not Fundamentally A Writer. I Know Writers, And I Have A Tremendous Amount Of Respect For Them. It Bothers Me That No Matter How Well I Do It, It's Not Really My Format.

I Knew Most Of My Radio Listeners Were Lefty Political People, And I Decided Definitively Not To Be That Guy - Not To Address Politics.

I'm Just Very Sort Of Compulsive And Lack The Ability To Keep Things In Perspective. If I'm Not Writing Or Playing Guitar Or On The Microphone Or Out On The Road, I'm Cleaning Pots And Pans Or Freaking Out About Some Plumbing Issue Or Tweeting.

We’re Built To Deal With Death, Disease, Failure, Struggle, Heartbreak, Problems. It’s What Separates Us From The Animals And Why We Envy And Love Animals So Much. We’re Aware Of It All And Have To Process It. The Way We Each Handle Being Human Is Where All The Good Stories, Jokes, Art, Wisdom, Revelations, And Bullshit Come From.

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In The Sixties And Seventies You Could Probably Name All The Great Comics. It Was Still Special.

I Always Thought I Was Funny, But I Was Very Sensitive, And Very Provocative Just To Get A Rise Out Of People.

What Comics Sacrifice And What Lives They Live - I Know That Most Of Their Lives, Their Adult Lives, They're Sitting Around Or Walking Around With Notebooks, Writing Things Down. Usually They're Fairly Sensitive. Usually They're Very Bright. And That Makes Them Poets.

Whether People Know The Evolution Of The Conversation Or Not, I Don't Know, But Thematically, As A Comedian, I Stay In The Same Ballpark - Around My Issues And My Philosophy Of Life.

We Live In An Age Where People Are Like, "i'd Love To Catch Up. Maybe Text Me Later? But Don't Call Because I Don't Really Listen To My Messages. But If You Text Me..." We've Displaced Interaction Into Sound Bites And Untethered Phrases And Sentences That Come Up On The Phone As Twitter Feed.

In Show Business, It Takes 10 Years To Create An Overnight Success. You've Heard That, Right? But What You Don't Hear Is That That's The Exact Same Amount Of Time It Takes To Create A Bitter Failure.

I Find That If I Don't Do Interviews, I Get A Little Squirrely. I Think That When You Engage With Someone Else, Or When You Engage In Something You're Passionate About, You're Sort Of Out Of Your Own Head.

Most Of My Comedy Writing Happens Through Improvisation On Stage; Doing It In The Moment.

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Because We're Comics And We Pass Each Other On Campus, We Know Of Each Other, And A Lot Of The Time There's A Mutual Respect There.

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I Think The Reason Jesus Is So Popular, Just On A Celebrity Level, Is That He Died At The Peak Of His Career.

I Live In Los Angeles, I Know It Exists. I Know You're Not Supposed To Taste Air.

I'm Not For Everyone. I'm Barely For Me.

Buying My Wife A Gun Sort Of Like Me Saying, ' You Know, I Kinda Want To Kill Myself, But I Want It To Be A Surprise'.

When I Was A Young Comic In New York And I Wasn't Getting Any Work, I Was Wandering Around The Lower East Side With My Notebook. I Would Stop At The Guitar Place On St. Mark's And Talk To That Dude For A While, Then I'd Go To The Bookstore And Talk To That Dude For A Little While. I Had A Guy Over At The Record Store, And I'd Talk To Him For A While. It Kept Me Connected To Life.

I Just Wanted To Be A Good Comic And Had No Sense Of Show Business, But At Some Point You Want The Opportunity To Write A Show About Your Life.

My Favorite Part Is Being Engaged With Somebody's Story And Life, And Getting A Laugh With People I Have A Tremendous Amount Of Respect For Or Not, And Being Challenged By The Immediacy Of Conversation.

I'm Just Saying, 'hey, Throw Me A Bone. How About A Smile, Cute T-shirt? Look At Me.' Nothing - Unless It's A Turn To Their Friends To Go, 'hey, Why Is That Weird Guy Looking At Us?'

I'm Proud To Be Part Of A Generation Where Reading Is A 'look.'

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I Didn't Really Want To Kill Myself, It Just Made Me Feel Better To Know I Could If I Wanted To.

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Collective Unconscious

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I'm Weird; I Have A Very Strange Emotional Memory. I Really Somehow Hold On To Even Passing Moments With People.

Passing Moments

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Most Of My Comedy Writing Happens Through Improvisation On Stage; Doing It In The Moment. Going Up With An Idea And Fleshing It Out Over Time On Stage And In Front Of People Until It Becomes A Full Bit.

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Mind Your Own Business

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Worrying About Money

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Maybe Depression Is The Most Reasonable Response To All The Crap Around Us. Maybe It's The Happy People Who Need Medication.

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I Came Upon Whatever I'm Doing Organically. I Didn't Study Anything. I Don't Have Any Real Aspirations Other Than To Connect With Somebody, And To Have The Conversation Be Genuine. That's The Best That Can Happen. Even If It Only Happens For 10 Minutes In An Episode. But I Think What People Forget Is That You Don't Have To Try To Get A Comedian To Be Funny. Comedians Are Innately Funny. That The Real Challenge Of Talking To Them Is To Get Them Talking About Real Things And Then See Where They Need To Be Funny. And Let Them Do That On Their Own Volition.

I'm Sad To See The Passing Of The Great Drug Warriors. I Certainly Did My Part In That Battle And I Don't Regret Any Of It.

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I Sort Of Get Tired Of Myself Sometimes. When You're Busy, Your Life Becomes Relatively Small. But I Don't Really Get Tired Of Talking To Other People.

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When You Actually Meet The Devil And He Offers You A Deal Most Artists Eventually Negotiate.

Dogs Are Too Much To Handle. I Don't Need Anything In My House That's Needier Than Me.

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Most Of The Comics That I Talk To I've Never Talked To For More Than Ten Minutes Ever. So 95 Percent Of The Time You're Really Hearing The First Conversation Between Me And That Guy On The Podcast.

I Believe In God... Just In Case. It's Like There's Some List Somewhere And You Don't Want To Be On It. I Don't Want To Say There's No God! And Then Die And Say, Oh, Hi... Is There Some Kind Of Community Service I Can Do?

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I'm Not A Moron, But Science Fiction To Me Requires A Suspension Of Disbelief And Honest Curiosity Or Fascination In That Kind Of Bullshit. I've Just Never Been Able To Make That Jump, Really. I Like Things To Be More Organic.

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In Most Cases The Only Difference Between Depression And Disappointment Is Your Level Of Commitment.

I've Always Been Someone Who Likes To Talk To People. When I Was A Little Kid, I Sought Out Freaks And Weirdos That Wandered The Streets By Where I Worked In High School. I Would Just Bring Them In And Talk To Them.

Jokes Do Finish Themselves. I Really Do See Them As Ongoing Conversations About Personal Themes That I Ruminate On.

I Didn't Know That People Compared Bill Hicks And I But Certainly I'm Flattered If They Do. I Knew Bill A Bit. We Had Dinner A Couple Of Times And Played Guitar Together Once. I Really Tried To Keep My Distance From Him Professionally.

I'm Not Against People Just Being Funny Or Telling Stories. I Don't Need To Delve Into The Soft, Dark Core All The Time. If It Happens, It Happens.

When You Commit Your Life To Something And It Doesn't Work Out, It Is A Tough Place To Be. Suicide Can Be The Spiritual Reprieve Of A Faithless Person. I Knew I Could Always Just End It, And There Was Solace In That.

You Get All Excited To Give Her The Ring, And It's Real Emotional, And You Give It To Her, And She Cries. And A Second Later, You're Like, 'damn, I Could Have Had A Car.'

You Know When You Make Popcorn There Are Always Those Fluffy White Kernels That Are Fun And Good To Eat But There Are Also Always Those Burnt, Black Kernels That Don’t Pop. You Know Why They Don’t Pop? Because They Have Integrity.

Conversation Is A Beautiful Thing. When I Was A Younger Guy, Just Wandering Around Talking To People Was What Kept Me Connected To The World.

I Think Seeing Pryor's First Movie, Live In Concert, When I Was In High School Changed My Life. Pryor Really Put The Heart In Darkness For Me.

I Have A Very Primitive Sense That If I Just Turn On A Radio Or The Television, That Somebody's Playing That Stuff For Me.

I Remember Seeing Richard Pryor's First Movie; It Was A Midnight Movie When I Was In High School. I Must Have Been About Fifteen. It Was One Of The Most Cathartic Experiences Of My Life. I'd Never Laughed That Much.

I Think That Standup Has Always Been An Acquired Taste And There Was Always Only A Handful Of Performers That Were Really Inspired.

I Don't Make A List Of Questions. Ever. I Think A Lot Of My Interviews Are Driven By My Need To Feel Connection.

I Immediately Went Out And Bought A Book On Anger Management. And Now I Have That Book, And I Don't Know If I'll Get To The Book. But I'm Certainly Excited About The Day Where I Can't Find The Book, And I Get To Say, 'where The Hell Is My Anger Management Book?!'

I Don't Seek Controversy. I Don't Seek To Antagonize. Sometimes It Happens, But I'm Not There To Argue Politics.

I Think Most Other Comics Are Like, 'i'm Going To Do My Fkin' Act And That'll Be That.' With Me, It's Like, 'what If I Forget My Jokes? What If I Can't Pull It Together? This Is Going To Be A Fking Disaster!'

Well, Evolution's Just A Theory.' And, I'm Thinking To Myself, 'well, Thank Goodness Gravity's A Law.'

I Seem To Offend Everybody. I Just Never Got Into The Universe. I Don't Seem To Have A Tremendous Amount Of Discipline Or Patience With Having To Follow A Story That Is Really Multi-leveled And Science-fiction.

On Some Level Any Appearance On Television Can Be Seen As A Product Endorsement.

I Look At Every Book As A Self-help Book.

It's Great To Have People Come Out. I Do Worry, Though. They Know Me Very Intimately, In A Way, If They Listen To My Show; They Know A Lot About Me.

It's Not All About Love. That's Half Of It... The Other Half Is About That Moment You Have With Yourself When You're Looking In The Mirror, And You Just Go, 'oh Man. I'm Going To Compromise My Dreams, Get Fat, Sick, Old And Die Someday. I Kind Of Want To Have Someone Around For That.'

I've Become Less Angry And A Little More Humble By Age And By Experience And By Going Through The Ups And Downs Of Life.

He Does Have That Weird Mixture Of Born Again Christian And Stupid That Some People Mistake For Courage And Focus.

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I Used To Be Jealous; I'm Not Jealous Anymore. And A Miracle Happened To Me, Because If You're Jealous, It's A Cancer, It's A Plague On Your Spirit, It Really Is. And I Actually Cured Jealousy In A Very Weird Way - I Cured It With Mathematics. And I'm Not A Math Person At All, But I've Been With My Wife For About Seven Years, So We Have Had Sex Probably, I'd Like To Think, Like, 9 Million Times Or, At Least, 1,500. So, The Way I Figured It, If She Goes Out And Screws Some Other Guy Once - I'm Still Winning.

In A Lot Of Ways, I'm Seeking Some Sort Of Peace Of Mind For Myself. I'm A Fairly Emotionally Petty, Resentful Guy Who Has An Inflated Sense Of Himself, And I Needed To Take That Down A Notch.

I Feel Bad For People Who Have Never Been Addicted To Anything, Because They're The Real Losers. You Want To Know Why? Because They Don't Know What It's Like To Really Want Something - And Then Get It Again And Again And Again.

I Used To Do A Lot Of Drugs. I Didn't Stop Because I Didn't Enjoy Them; I Stopped Because I Couldn't Handle The Commitment.

Some Of You May Be Perfectly Happy With Mediocrity. Some Of You Will Get Nothing But Heartbreak. Some Of You Will Be Heralded As Geniuses And Become Huge. Of Course, All Of You Think That One Describes You...hence The Delusion Necessary To Push On.

It Seems People Are More Willing To Let Other People Control Their Minds Now And Recreational Drug Use Doesn't Seem To Have That Same Renegade Sense Of Adventure That It Once Did.

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There's This Whole Post-modern, Nuevo Beatnik, Retro-bohemian Thing Going On, You Know What I Mean? You Walk Into Some Coffee Shops, And It Feels Like You're An Ex-patriot In Paris In The 20s. You're Like, 'hey, Isn't That A Young Ernest Hemingway Over There? Yeah, I Think It Is! Hey, Let's Go Have A Look And See What He's Writing... It's A Gap Application.'

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My Dad Is Actually A Manic Depressive, Which Is Very Exciting Half The Time.

Let's Be Honest, This Is A Consumer Based Economy In America. That's All We Manufacture Here Is Need And Appetite. We Are The World's Mouth. They Make Things In Other Countries, And They're Like, 'send It To America; They'll Eat It.'

The Medium Of Podcasting And The Personal Nature Of It, The Relationship You Build With Your Listeners And The Relationship They Have With You - They Could Be Just Sitting There, Chuckling And Listening... There's Nothing Like That.

Comedy Is Obviously A Matter Of Personal Taste And The World Always Needs A Clown And Some People Have No Taste At All And Any Clown Will Do.

You Hope To See An Arc Of Growth In Your Ability To Become A Character On Television.

I Think Things Evolve Into Jokes. I Don't Generally Write Them Down As Jokes. I Talk Them Out.

It May Have Lost Its Special-ness Forever And The Clubs Might Not Being Doing Well But I Think Standup Is In The Best Shape It Has Been In A Long Time.

The Bile Makes It Better. I Am An Information Wasting Machine - 100s Of Words A Day.

As I Became Very Conscious And More Aware Of Things I Got Very Into The Beatniks And That Kind Of Stuff. They Were Very Important To Me For A Few Years.

There's A Fine Line Between Cultural Criticism And Bitterness.

I Don't Really Compartmentalize Well. I'm In A State Of Anxiety And Panic A Lot, But It's For Different Reasons. It Used To Be Because I Had Nothing Going On, But I Work Very Hard And There Doesn't Seem To Be An End To It.

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I Was Married Once Before, And I Stopped.

How Complicated Can Ice Cream Flavors Be? How Much Can You Put In There? I Mean, When The Flavor's Something Like Banana Ice Cream With Caramel, Fudge Chunks, Cheddar Goldfish And Pennies - You've Got To Draw A Line There.

It Always Astounds Me That Over The Course Of My Career, And Having Lived In Four Comedy Cities - New York, Boston, San Francisco, And Los Angeles - There's Very Few People I Haven't Run Into.

A Lot Of People Think That Jesus Is Coming Back. That's Fine, It's Your Right. But You Know, I Live In New York, And I Think He's Running A Little Late. I'm Asking Myself, 'alright, What Happens If Jesus Comes Back Tomorrow? What - Does He Make Rounds To Churches?' 'ok, Everyone Who's Been Good, Buses Leave In 10 Minutes. I'll Meet You In Front Of The Post Office. I Gotta Go. Oh, Don't Tell The Jews I'm Back.'

I'm Not A Narcissist, But I Definitely Have Gotten Enough Explosive Narcissistic Shrapnel From My Father. I'm Sort Of Wired That Way, But I Don't Feel That I'm Pathological, So All I Can Pull From Is My Own Existence And My Knowledge.

The Way I Figure It, If You Can't Tell I'm High By Looking At Me, I Win.

I Don't Care What Anybody Says, I Think That George Bush Is Absolutely The Right President To Oversea The End Of The World.

As A Performer You Are Being Used To Keep People Watching So The Commercial Endorsements That Support The Network Can Be Seen By As Many People As Possible.

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