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Sam Screamed The Fun Scream, And There It Was. Downtown Lights On Buildings And Everything That Makes You Wonder. Sam Sat Down And Started Laughing. Patrick Started Laughing. I Started Laughing. And In That Moment, I Swear We Were Infinite.

-Stephen Chbosky

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Sam Screamed The Fun

Stephen Chbosky

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Sam Screamed The Fun Scream, And There It Was. Downtown Lights On Buildings And Everything That Makes You Wonder. Sam Sat Down And Started Laughing. Patrick Started Laughing. I Started Laughing. And In That Moment, I Swear We Were Infinite.

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There Were Other Stories And Other Names. Second Base Stace, Who Had Breasts In Fourth Grade And Let Some Of The Boys Feel Them. Vincent, Who Took Acid And Tried To Flush A Sofa Down The Toilet. Sheila, Who Allegedly Masturbated With A Hot Dog And Had To Go To The Emergency Room. The List Went On And On.

I Think That If I Ever Have Kids, And They Are Upset, I Won't Tell Them That People Are Starving In China Or Anything Like That Because It Wouldn't Change The Fact That They Were Upset. And Even If Somebody Else Has It Much Worse, That Doesn't Really Change The Fact That You Have What You Have.

"i Hate You." My Sister Said It Different Than She Said It To My Dad. She Meant It With Me.she Really Did. "i Love You," Was All I Could Say In Return. "you're A Freak, You Know That? Everyone Says So. They Always Have." "i'm Trying Not To Be.” Then, I Turned Around And Walked To My Room And Closed My Door And Put My Head Under My Pillow And Let The Quiet Put Things Where They Are Supposed To Be.

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I've Never Understood The Need People Have To Dictate Morality To Other People. I Really Don't Know What It Is. I Don't Know If It's Fear Or The Belief That They Know The Only Right Way. Or Maybe They See A Lot Of Social Ills And Social Decline, And They Really Think They Have The Elixir For It.

And She Says She Wants To Expose Me To All These Great Things. And To Tell You The Truth, I Don't Really Want To Be Exposed To All These Great Things If It Means That I'll Have To Hear Mary Elizabeth Talk About All The Great Things She Exposed Me To All The Time. I Don't Understand That. I Would Give Someone A Record So They Could Love The Record, Not So They Would Always Know That I Gave It To Them.

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I Wish I Knew. It Might Make Me Miss Him More Clearly. It Might Have Made Sad Sense.

Those Writers That Have Zero Say In Their Movie Adaptations Have Zero Say Because They Sell It. If You Don't Sell It, And You Do It Yourself, And You Wait Until The Screenplay Is Ready, You Don't Have To Worry About That.

As You See The Opening Get Closer, You Just Can't Get Fast Enough. And Finally, Just When You Think You'll Never Get There, You See The Opening Right In Front Of You.

And I Could See This Boy Doing His Homework And Thinking About My Sister Naked. And I Could See Them Holding Hands At Football Games That They Do Not Watch. And I Could See This Boy Throwing Up In The Bushes At A Party House. And I Could See My Sister Putting Up With It. And I Felt Very Bad For Both Of Them.

I Just Wish That God Or My Parents Or Sam Or My Sister Or Someone Would Just Tell Me What's Wrong With Me. Just Tell Me How To Be Different In A Way That Makes Sense. To Make This All Go Away.

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So I Started Shoveling Bob's Driveway, Which Is A Strange Thing To Do At A New Years Eve Party

The Radio Comes Back Even Louder Than You Remember It.

And I Closed My Eyes Because I Wanted To Know Nothing But Her Arms.

And When She Started Becoming A “young Lady,” And No One Was Allowed To Look At Her Because She Thought She Was Fat. And How She Really Wasn’t Fat. And How She Was Actually Very Pretty. And How Different Her Face Looked When She Realized Boys Thought She Was Pretty. And How Different Her Face Looked The First Time She Really Liked A Boy Who Was Not On A Poster On Her Wall. And How Her Face Looked When She Realized She Was In Love With That Boy. I Wondered How Her Face Would Look When She Came Out From Behind Those Doors.

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So, I Guess We Are Who We Are For Alot Of Reasons. And Maybe We'll Never Know Most Of Them. But Even If We Don't Have The Power To Choose Where We Come From, We Can Still Choose Where We Go From There. We Can Still Do Things. And We Can Try To Feel Okay About Them.

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And I Thought About How Many People Have Loved Those Songs. And How Many People Got Through A Lot Of Bad Times Because Of Those Songs. And How Many People Enjoyed Good Times With Those Songs. And How Much Those Songs Really Mean. I Think It Would Be Great To Have Written One Of Those Songs. I Bet If I Wrote One Of Them, I Would Be Very Proud. I Hope The People Who Wrote Those Songs Are Happy. I Hope They Feel It's Enough. I Really Do Because They've Made Me Happy. And I'm Only One Person.

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Perks Of A Wallflower

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I Wish I Could Stop Being In Love With Sam. I Really Do.

I Don't Know What I'm Supposed To Do Now. I Know Other People Have It A Lot Worse. I Do Know That, But It's Crashing In Anyway, And I Just Can't Stop Thinking That The Little Kid Eating French Fries With His Mom In The Shopping Mall Is Going To Grow Up And My Sister.

Deep Down...she's A Good Woman...you Should Be Proud Of Her." When I Told My Mom About This, She Just Looked Very Sad Because He Could Never Say Those Things To Her. Not Ever. Not Even When He Walked Her Down The Aisle.

The Movie Itself Was Very Interesting, But I Didn't Think It Was Very Good Because I Didn't Really Feel Different When It Was Over.

I Am Really In Love With Sam, And It Hurts Very Much.

In The Last Month Or So, I Have Read The Great Gatsby And A Separate Peace. I Am Starting To See A Real Trend In The Kind Of Books Bill Gives Me To Read. And Just Like The Tape Of Songs, It Is Amazing To Hold Each Of Them In The Palm Of My Hand. They Are All My Favorites. All Of Them.

I Look At People Holdings Hands In The Hallways, And I Try To Think How It All Works. At The School Dances, I Sit In The Background, And I Tap My Toe, And I Wonder How Many Couples Will Dance To ‘their Song.’ In The Hallways, I See The Girls Wearing The Guys’ Jackets, And I Think About The Idea Of Property. And I Wonder If Anyone Is Really Happy.

I Walk Around The School Hallways And Look At The People. I Look At The Teachers And Wonder Why They're Here. If They Like Their Jobs. Or Us. And I Wonder How Smart They Were When They Were Fifteen. Not In A Mean Way. In A Curious Way. It's Like Looking At All The Students And Wondering Who's Had Their Heart Broken That Day, And How They Are Able To Cope With Having Three Quizzes And A Book Report Due On Top Of That. Or Wondering Who Did The Heart Breaking. And Wondering Why.

Harold And Maude' Was A Seminal Movie For Me Because It's Not Only A Beautiful Love Story, But It's Also About The Moment When Misfits Find Each Other.

It’s Much Easier Not To Know Things Sometimes.

Perks Of A Wallflower

To Tell You The Truth, I've Just Been Avoiding Everything.

The Inside Jokes Weren't Jokes Anymore. They Had Become Stories. Nobody Brought Up The Bad Names Or The Bad Times. And Nobody Felt Sad As Long As We Could Postpone Tomorrow With More Nostalgia.

I Found, Through The Process Of Doing 'the Perks Of Being A Wallflower,' That I Really Love Directing Movies And I Love Writing Books And So This Will Become The Centerpiece Of My Career For The Next Ten Or Twenty Years. Doing These Adaptations.

The Juniors Were Acting Different Because They Are Now The Seniors. They Even Had T-shirts Made. I Don't Know Who Plans These Things.

He's A Wallflower." And Bob Nodded His Head. And The Whole Room Nodded Their Head. And I Started To Feel Nervous In The Bob Way, But Patrick Didn't Let Me Get Too Nervous. He Sat Down Next To Me. "you See Things. You Keep Quiet About Them. And You Understand.

To Kill A Mockingbird. If You Haven't Read It, I Think You Should Because It Is Very Interesting.

I Wanted To Laugh. Or Maybe Get Mad. Or Maybe Shrug At How Strange Everyone Was, Especially Me.

And We Could All Sit Around And Wonder And Feel Bad About Each Other And Blame A Lot Of People For What They Did Or Didn’t Do Or What They Didn’t Know. I Don’t Know. I Guess There Would Always Be Someone To Blame.

It's Strange Because Sometimes, I Read A Book, And I Think I Am The People In The Book.

I'm Just Thinking Too Fast-- Much Too Fast.

Do You Enjoy Holidays With Your Family? I Don't Mean Your Mom And Dad Family, But Your Uncle And Aunt And Cousin Family? Personally, I Do. There Are Several Reasons For This. First, I Am Very Interested And Fascinated By How Everyone Loves Each Other, But No One Really Likes Each Other. Second, The Fights Are Always The Same.

When You Publish A Book, You Do So In Part To End The Silence. All Censorship Is Silence. I Would Never, As An Author, Feel Right Requiring A Young Person Whose Family Would Object To The Book To Read It. Just As I Would Never Force That Person To Read It, I Would Ask Those Folks To Not Force Others Not To Read It. To Me, That Is Just Good Manners.

That Was Always My Hope That That Is Exactly What I Would Do. It Was Always Part Of The Dream Of This Story - To Write The Novel And Then Direct The Movie.

The Thing Is, Some Girls Think They Can Actually Change Guys. And What’s Funny Is That If They Actually Did Change Them, They’d Get Bored. They’d Have No Challenge Left. You Just Have To Give Girls Some Time To Think Of A New Way Of Doing Things, That’s All. Some Of Them Will Figure It Out Here. Some Later. Some Never. I Wouldn’t Worry About It Too Much.

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Perks Of A Wallflower

The Perfect Song On The Perfect Drive To Make You Feel Infinite.

He Was The Boy That Made Mix Tapes With Themes And Hand-colored Covers Until The Day He Hit My Sister And Stopped Crying.

There Was A Time When These Weren't Memories.

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Incidentally, I Only Have One Cavity, And As Much As My Dentist Asks Me To, I Just Can't Bring Myself To Floss.

Except That My Father Got A Raise, And My Mother Didn't Because She Doesn't Get Paid For Housework, And My Sister Stopped Reading Those Self-esteem Books Because She Met A New Boy

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All I Could Do Is Lie There And Think About How Much Her Voice Changed When She Asked Me If She Was Pretty, And How Much She Changed When I Answered.

Standing On The Fringes Of Life... Offers A Unique Perspective. But There Comes A Time To See What It Looks Like From The Dance Floor.

It's Strange To Describe Reading A Book As A Really Great Experience, But That's Kind Of How It Felt.

It's Great That You Can Listen And Be A Shoulder To Someone, But What About When Someone Doesn't Need A Shoulder? What If They Need The Arms Or Something Like That? You Can't Just Sit There And Put Everybody's Lives Ahead Of Yours And Think That Counts As Love. You Just Can't. You Have To Do Things.

I Think They Were Afraid That Some Of Us Would Try To Kill Ourselves Or Something Because They Looked Very Tense And One Of Them Kept Touching His Beard.

Patrick Actually Used To Be Popular Before Sam Bought Him Some Good Music.

Sam Screamed The Fun Scream, And There It Was. Downtown Lights On Buildings And Everything That Makes You Wonder. Sam Sat Down And Started Laughing. Patrick Started Laughing. I Started Laughing. And In That Moment, I Swear We Were Infinite.

Sam Dropped Me Off. When She Was Too Far Away To See Me, I Started To Cry Again. Because She Was My Friend Again. And That Was Enough For Me.

I Couldn't Believe Sam Actually Got Me A Present Because I Honestly Thought The "i Love You" Was It.

There Are Rules You Follow Here Not Because You Want To, But Because You Have To.

I Don't Know The Significance Of This, But I Find It Very Interesting.

Very Interesting

I Know That Things Get Worse Before They Get Better Because That’s What My Psychiatrist Says, But This Is A Worse That Feels Too Big.

Girls Are Weird, And I Don't Mean That Offensively. I Just Can't Put It Any Other Way.

I Guess When You See Somebody In The Hallway Or On The Field Or Something, It's Nice To Know That They Are A Real Person.

I Love My Mom. And This Time, I Told Her I Loved Her. And She Told Me She Loved Me, Too. And Things Were Okay For A Little While.

But Right Now I’m Here With You. And I Want To Know Where You Are, What You Need, And What You Want To Do.

And Even If She Says No, And Really Means Yes, Then Quite Frankly She's Playing Games And Isn't Worth The Price Of Dinner.

I Love Twinkies, And The Reason I Am Saying That Is Because We Are All Supposed To Think Of Reasons To Live.

Why Do I And Everyone I Love Pick People Who Treat Us Like We're Nothing"; - "we Accept The Love We Think We Deserve.

Perks Of A Wallflower

Most Of The People I Know Who Were Raised To Be Accommodating Or Were Raised To Just Be Nice And Put Everybody's Needs Ahead Of Theirs, There Comes A Moment When The Pressure Builds And They Can't Do It Anymore. They Have Needs And They Feel Neglected And They Usually Explode.

I Don’t Want To Start Thinking Again. Not Like I Have This Last Week. I Can’t Think Again. Not Ever Again.

Downtown. Lights On Buildings And Everything That Makes You Wonder. And In That Moment, I Swear We Were Infinite.

Just Tell Me How To Be Different In A Way That Makes Sense.

Not Everyone Has A Sob Story, Charlie, And Even If They Do, It's No Excuse.

Perks Of A Wallflower

Writing Screenplays Is Incredibly Hard. I Can't Call It Joy. Writing Novels? Joy. Directing? Joy. Writing Screenplays? That's Where You Pay All Your Dues.

Girls Like Guys To Be A Challenge. It Gives Them Some Mold To Fit In How They Act. Like A Mom. What Would A Mom Do If She Couldn't Fuss Over You And Make You Clean Your Room? And What Would You Do Without Her Fussing And Making You Do It? Everyone Needs A Mom. And A Mom Knowns This. And It Gives Her A Sense Of Purpose. You Get It?

If You Are In A Movie Theater, You Can Look Two People Down And They Are Laughing While You Are Laughing Or You Can Look Three People Down And They Love That Song That You Love. It Is Living Proof That You Are Not Alone.

When We Were All Getting Ready To Leave, I Walked Up To My Grandfather And Gave Him A Hug And Kiss On The Cheek. He Wiped My Lip Print Off With His Palm And Gave Me A Look. He Doesn't Like The Boys In The Family To Touch Him. But I'm Very Glad That I Did It Anyway In Case He Dies. I Never Got To Do That With My Aunt Helen.

This Moment Will Just Be Another Story Someday.

I Hate You." I Love You." You're A Freak, You Know That? Everyone Says So. They Always Have." I'm Trying Not To Be.

And In That Moment, I Swear We Were Infinite.

Some Kids Look At Me Strange In The Hallways Because I Don't Decorate My Locker.

It's Like He Would Take A Photograph Of Sam, And The Photograph Would Be Beautiful. And He Would Think That The Reason The Photograph Was Beautiful Was Because Of How He Took It. If I Took It, I Would Know That The Only Reason It's Beautiful Is Because Of Sam.

Nobody Felt Sad As Long As We Could Postpone Tomorrow With More Nostalgia.

But At One Point, Craig Was Talking About Something, And Sam Turned To Me And Smiled. It Was A Movie Smile In Slow Motion, And Then Everything Was Okay.

I Was In The Shopping Mall Because That's Where I Go Lately. For The Last Couple Of Weeks, I've Been Going There Every Day, Trying To Figure Out Why People Go There. It's Kind Of A Personal Project.

Five Minutes Of A Lifetime Were Truly Spent, And We Felt Young In A Good Way.

She Said That By Introducing Me To All These Great Things, Mary Elizabeth Gained A “superior Position” That She Wouldn’t Need If She Was Confident About Herself. She Also Said That People Who Try To Control Situations All The Time Are Afraid That If They Don’t, Nothing Will Work Out The Way They Want.

I Just Don't Want You To Worry About Me, Or Think You've Met Me, Or Waste Your Time Anymore.

I Really Think That Everyone Should Have Watercolors, Magnetic Poetry, And A Harmonica.

I Just Laid Around In My Bed, Looking At The Ceiling, And I Smiled Because It Was A Nice Kind Of Quiet.

I Was Looking At The Photographs And I Started Thinking That There Was A Time When These Weren't Memories.

It's Like Looking At All The Students And Wondering Who's Had Their Heart Broken That Day, And How They Are Able To Cope With Having Three Quizzes And A Book Report On Top Of That.

If The Right Thing Came Along, I Would Absolutely Direct Something I Did Not Write Because I Love The Process So Much, But We'll See. I'm Taking It Day By Day.

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