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My Father Worked For The Same Firm For 12 Years. They Fired Him And Replaced Him With A Tiny Gadget That Does Everything My Father Does, Only Much Better. The Depressing Thing Is My Mother Ran Out And Bought One
-Woody Allen
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My Father Worked For

Woody Allen
My Father Worked For The Same Firm For 12 Years. They Fired Him And Replaced Him With A Tiny Gadget That Does Everything My Father Does, Only Much Better. The Depressing Thing Is My Mother Ran Out And Bought One
Views: 31057
Topic
Mother
Depressing
Time
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Weekend
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Two
Dresses
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Showing Up
Life Is
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Thinking
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Writing
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Love
Funny
Life
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Baseball
Thinking
Kkk
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Moving
Cities
Light
Everybody Knows How Awful The World Is And What A Terrible Situation It Is And Each Person Distorts It In A Certain Way That Enables Him To Get Through. Some People Distort It With Religious Things. Some People Distort It With Sports, With Money, With Love, With Art, And They All Have Their Own Nonsense About What Makes It Meaningful, And All But Nothing Makes It Meaningful. These Things Definitely Serve A Certain Function, But In The End They All Fail To Give Life Meaning And Everyone Goes To His Grave In A Meaningless Way.
Meaningful
Sports
Religious
I Hate Reality But It's Still The Best Place To Get A Good Steak.
Witty
Funny Life
Hate
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New York
Thinking
Civilization
Standard Mathematics Has Recently Been Rendered Obsolete By The Discovery That For Years We Have Been Writing The Numeral Five Backward. This Has Led To Reevaluation Of Counting As A Method Of Getting From One To Ten. Students Are Taught Advanced Concepts Of Boolean Algebra, And Formerly Unsolvable Equations Are Dealt With By Threats Of Reprisals.
Education
Writing
Science
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Mean
Wish
Getting Older
Life Doesn't Imitate Art, It Imitates Bad Television.
Funny
Life
Art
I Can't Understand Why More People Aren't Bisexual. It Would Double Your Chances For A Date On Saturday Night.
Sex
Night
People
If You Aren't Failing, You Aren't Trying.
Trying
Failing
Ifs
Umlaut Snaps Around And We Cut To A Blond Apparition In Her Early Twenties, Clearly Descended From Olympus By Way Of Hugh Hefner's Mansion.
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Beauty
Humor
I Think Being Funny Is Not Anyone's First Choice.
Funny
Thinking
Choices
I Love Baseball. You Know, It Doesn’t Have To Mean Anything. It’s Just Very Beautiful To Watch.
Beautiful
Baseball
Mean
There's Nothing Sexier Than A Lapsed Catholic.
Catholic
Catholicism
In Life, One Is Entitled To A Side Dish Of Either Coleslaw Or Potato Salad, And The Choice Must Be Made In Terror, With The Knowledge That Not Only Is Our Time On Earth Limited But Most Kitchens Close At Ten.
Choices
Kitchen
Earth
I Want To Tell You A Terrific Story About Oral Contraception. I Asked This Girl To Sleep With Me And She Said 'no.
Funny
Girl
Crazy
Should I Marry W.? Not If She Won't Tell Me The Other Letters In Her Name.
Funny
Humorous
Names
You Know, It's One Thing About Intellectuals, They Prove That You Can Be Absolutely Brilliant And Have No Idea What's Going On.
Ideas
Annie Hall
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Writing
Mean
Tunnels
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Hell
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Children
Middle Child
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Years
Jam
Use
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Enjoy It While It Lasts
Answers
Should
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Choices
Despair
Path
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Writing
Air
Luxury
We Are All Interested In The Future, For That Is Where You And I Are Going To Spend The Rest Of Our Lives.
Witty
Humorous
Books And Movies
To You I'm An Atheist; To God, I'm The Loyal Opposition.
Loyalty
Atheist
Religion
If You Don't Fail Now And Again, It's A Sign You're Playing It Safe.
Safety
Risk
Playing It Safe
What Is It About Death That Bothers Me? Probably The Hours.
Hours
Bother
Is Sex Dirty? Only When It's Being Done Right.
Witty
Sex
Humorous
Sex Alleviates Tension. Love Causes It.
Love
Funny
Sex
Bisexuality Doubles Your Chances Of A Date On A Saturday Night. I Believe That Sex Is A Beautiful Thing Between Two People. Between Five, It's Fantastic. If There Is Reincarnation, I'd Like To Come Back As Warren Beatty's Fingertips. I'm Such A Good Lover Because I Practice A Lot On My Own. My Love Life Is Terrible. The Last Time I Was Inside A Woman Was When I Visited The Statue Of Liberty. Sex Without Love Is An Empty Experience, But As Empty Experiences Go It's A Pretty Good One.
Love
Funny
Beautiful
You Can't Work At A Relationship; You Can't Control It. You Have To Be Lucky And Go Through Your Life. If You Are Not Lucky You Have To Be Prepared For Some Degree Of Suffering. That's Why Most Relationships Are Very Difficult And Have Some Degree Of Pain. People Stay Together Because Of Inertia, They Don't Have The Energy. Because They Are Frightened Of Being Lonely, Or They Have Children.
Lonely
Children
Pain
But It Was I - Yes I - Who Discovered The Link Between Excessive Masturbation And Entry Into Politics!
Links
Masturbation
Entry
I Have One Last Request. Don't Use Embalming Fluid On Me; I Want To Be Stuffed With Crab Meat.
Meat
Use
Want
People Always Tease Me. They Say, Look At You, You Went For So Much Psychoanalysis And You're So Neurotic, You Wind Up Marrying A Girl So Much Younger Than You.
Girl
Wind
People
Life Is Like A Concentration Camp... You Can't Leave Without Dying.
Dying
Life Is Like
Concentration
In My House I'm The Boss, My Wife Is Just The Decision Maker.
Marriage
Funny Love
Best Love
I Was In Analysis. I Was Suicidal. As A Matter Of Fact, I Would Have Killed Myself, But I Was In Analysis With A Strict Freudian And If You Kill Yourself They Make You Pay For The Sessions You Miss.
Funny
Humor
Suicidal
I Always Thought It Would Be Very Funny If I Was A Blind Film Director.
Directors
Would Be
Film
There's No Way To Prove That There Is No God. You Just Have To Take It On Faith.
Way
There Is No God
Prove
What I Do Know About Physics Is That To A Man Standing On The Shore, Time Passes Quicker Than To A Man On A Boat - Especially If The Man On The Boat Is With His Wife.
Funny
Time
Men
The Food Here Is Terrible, And The Portions Are Too Small.
Food
Terrible
Portions
I'm A Teleological, Existential Agnostic.
Agnostic
Existential
The Man Who Said 'i'd Rather Be Lucky Than Good' Saw Deeply Into Life. People Are Afraid To Face How Great A Part Of Life Is Dependent On Luck. It's Scary To Think So Much Is Out Of One's Control. There Are Moments In A Match When The Ball Hits The Top Of The Net And For A Split Second It Can Either Go Forward Or Fall Back. With A Little Luck It Goes Forward And You Win. Or Maybe It Doesn't And You Lose.
Fall
Winning
Men
In Real Life, Keaton Believes In God. But She Also Believes That The Radio Works Because There Are Tiny People Inside It.
Real
Believe
People
If My Soul Exists Without My Body I Am Convinced All My Clothes Will Be Loose-fitting
Clothes
Soul
Body
What If Everything Is An Illusion And Nothing Exists? In That Case, I Definitely Overpaid For My Carpet.
Inspirational
Funny
Witty
I've Never Felt Truth Was Beauty. Never. I've Always Felt That People Can't Take Too Much Reality. I Like Being In Ingmar Bergman's World. Or In Louis Armstrong's World. Or In The World Of The New York Knicks. Because It's Not This World. You Spend Your Whole Life Searching For A Way Out. You Just Get An Overdose Of Reality, You Know, And It's A Terrible Thing. I'm Always Fighting Against Reality.
New York
Fighting
Reality
I Do Believe That Reality Is Dreadful And That You Are Forced To Choose It In The End Or Go Crazy, But That It Kills You.
Crazy
Believe
Reality
Some People Think About Sex All The Time; Some People Think Of Sex Some Of The Time; And Some People Never Think About Sex: They Become Lawyers.
Sex
Thinking
People
It's Easier To Direct. If You Direct Something Poorly And Re-shoot It The Next Day, Stage It Better, Make It Work Better, You Have A Lot Of Possibilities. You Can Edit It In Certain Ways So That It Works, But There's No Getting Around Weaknesses Of The Script.
Next Day
Weakness
Way
What A World. It Could Be So Wonderful If It Wasn't For Certain People.
People
World
Wonderful
We Laughed Over It, And Hemingway Punched Me In The Mouth.
Mouths
Over It
Laughed
I've Always Had An Easy Time Directing Actors Because I Always Hire Ones That Are Great Before I Get My Hands On Them.
Hands
Actors
Easy
Even If God Exists, He's Done Such A Terrible Job, It's A Wonder People Don't Get Together And File A Class Action Suit Against Him.
God
Jobs
Class
You'll Find As You Go Through Life That Great Depth And Smoldering Sensuality Don't Always Win.
Winning
Depth
Sensuality
90 Per Cent Of Success Is Turning Up.
Cents
There's No Correlation Between What The Public Likes And What I'm After. I'm In A Different World.
Different
World
Likes
When You Travel Around The Country, You See What A Tough Town New York Is: Rude, Competitive, A Town Where Good, Logical Ideas Are Ignored In Favor Of Unworkable Ones. And Yet, All These Other Towns Are So Dead And Boring Compared To New York.
Country
New York
Logical Ideas
I Don't Inhale Because It Gives You Cancer, But I Look So Incredibly Handsome With A Cigarette That I Can't Not Hold One.
Cancer
Giving
Smoking
Sex On Twitter Can't Hurt You - Unless You Fall Off.
Anniversary
Hurt
Sex
It Is No Secret That Organized Crime In America Takes In Over Forty Billion Dollars A Year. This Is Quite A Profitable Sum, Especially When One Considers That The Mafia Spends Very Little For Office Supplies.
Sarcastic
Sarcasm
Years
My Films Are Misinterpreted All The Time. I Don't Mind That. Everybody's Films Are Misinterpreted. But There's No Malice Or Stupidity In The People That Misinterpret Them. You Know What You Do, But Someone Else Sees It, And They Want To Talk About It Or Write About It, And So They Misinterpret Them.
Writing
People
Stupidity
As The Poet Said, 'only God Can Make A Tree,' Probably Because It's So Hard To Figure Out How To Get The Bark On.
Sarcastic
Nature
Sarcasm
After 60, All Of Us Belong To The Weaker Sex.
Sex
I Think Bergman's Films Have Eternal Relevance, Because They Deal With The Difficulty Of Personal Relationships And Lack Of Communication Between People And Religious Aspirations And Mortality, Existential Themes That Will Be Relevant A Thousand Years From Now. When Many Of The Things That Are Successful And Trendy Today Will Have Been Long Relegated To Musty-looking Antiques, His Stuff Will Still Be Great.
Religious
Communication
Successful
His Lack Of Education Is More Than Compensated For By His Keenly Developed Moral Bankruptcy.
Education
Book
Beer
To Me, Movies Are Valuable As An Art Form And As A Wonderful Means Of Popular Entertainment. But I Think Movies Have Gone Terribly Wrong.
Art
Mean
Thinking
I Write About What I Want To Write About, And So The Film Comes Out As A Very Personal Expression Even If Its Subject Matter Is Totally Prefabricated.
Writing
Expression
Want
I Can't Imagine Any Director Directing A Screenplay Of Mine, Because The Great Directors All Have Very Personal Styles, And The Ones That Don't Are Not Very Interesting Directors.
Interesting
Style
Directors
I Cannot Say For Certain That God Does Not Exist; I Think The Worst Thing That Can Be Said About Him Is That He's A Bit Of An Underachiever.
Thinking
Superstitions
Doe
Isn't All Mankind Ultimately Executed For A Crime It Never Committed?
Crime
Capital Punishment
Mankind
I Should Have Known Something Was Wrong With My First Wife. When I Brought Her Home To Meet My Parents, They Approved Of Her.
Home
Divorce
Should Have
My Wife And I Thought We Were In Love, But It Turned Out To Be Benign
Inspiration
Wife
Benign
At The Trial Stubbs Chose To Act As His Own Lawyer, But A Conflict Over His Fee Led To Ill Feelings.
Funny
Humorous
Feelings
There Are Three Things Jewish People Worship-god, Chinese Food And Wall-to-wall Carpeting.
Wall
People
Chinese
[stanley] Kubrick Was A Great Artist And A Perfectionist. He Always Wanted The Exact Right Thing. He Did A Million Takes. Everything Had To Be Perfect. I'm An Imperfectionist. I Don't Really Care That Much About The Work. I Write Quickly. I'm Careless. I Shoot Carelessly.
Writing
Artist
Perfect
By Now They Had Mastered My Own Language, But They Still Made Simple Mistakes, Like Using 'hermeneutics,' When They Meant 'heuristic'.
Mistake
Simple
Heuristics
Understanding Quotes: Their Essence and Application

Quotes, or quotations, are powerful tools in communication, encapsulating ideas, emotions, and wisdom in concise expressions. They serve various purposes across different contexts, from academic writing to everyday conversation.

1. Defining Quotes

A quote is a repetition of someone else's statement or thoughts. It can be a direct replication of words spoken or written by another individual, often used to support arguments, provide evidence, or convey profound insights.


2. The Importance of Quotes

2.1. Enhancing Credibility

Incorporating quotes from authoritative sources can bolster the credibility of your work. By referencing experts or primary sources, you demonstrate thorough research and a solid foundation for your arguments.


2.2. Providing Evidence

Quotes serve as concrete evidence to support claims. In academic and professional writing, they validate points made, offering readers a basis to trust the information presented.


2.3. Conveying Emotions and Perspectives

Quotes can encapsulate emotions and perspectives succinctly. They allow writers to express complex feelings or viewpoints through the words of others, often more eloquently than paraphrasing.


3. Types of Quotes

3.1. Direct Quotes

Direct quotes involve copying the exact words from a source, enclosed in quotation marks. They are used when the original wording is significant or particularly well-expressed.


3.2. Indirect Quotes (Paraphrasing)

Indirect quotes restate the original message in your own words. While not enclosed in quotation marks, they still require proper attribution to the original source.


3.3. Block Quotes

Block quotes are lengthy direct quotations, formatted as a separate block of text. They are typically used for quotes exceeding a certain length, varying by citation style. For instance, in APA style, quotes longer than 40 words are formatted as block quotes.



4. Proper Usage of Quotes


4.1. Contextual Relevance

Ensure that the quote you choose is relevant to the topic and adds value to your content. Avoid inserting quotes solely for decorative purposes.


4.2. Integration into Your Writing

Seamlessly integrate quotes into your writing. Introduce them appropriately and follow up with analysis or commentary to connect them to your main points.


4.3. Attribution and Citation

Always attribute quotes to their original authors and provide proper citations according to the required style guide (APA, MLA, Chicago, etc.).


5. Common Mistakes to Avoid


5.1. Overusing Quotes

Relying too heavily on quotes can overshadow your voice. Use them sparingly to support your arguments, not replace them.


5.2. Lack of Analysis

Presenting a quote without analysis or explanation can leave readers questioning its relevance. Always follow up with your interpretation or discussion.


5.3. Misquoting or Taking Out of Context

Ensure that quotes are accurate and not taken out of context, as this can mislead readers and undermine your credibility.



6. Quotes in Different Contexts


6.1. Academic Writing

In academic writing, quotes are used to support arguments, provide evidence, and engage with existing literature. Proper citation is crucial to avoid plagiarism.


6.2. Journalism

Journalists use quotes to provide firsthand accounts, add authenticity, and present multiple perspectives within a story.


6.3. Literature and Creative Writing

In literature, quotes can be used to convey character voices, themes, and stylistic elements. They enrich narratives and provide depth to storytelling.



7. Punctuation and Formatting


Understanding the correct punctuation and formatting of quotes is essential:


Quotation Marks: Always enclose direct quotes within quotation marks.


Punctuation Placement: In American English, periods and commas are placed inside quotation marks, while colons and semicolons are placed outside.


Block Quotes: For longer quotes, format them as block quotes without quotation marks, and indent the entire block.



8. Ethical Considerations


Ethical use of quotes involves accurate representation, proper attribution, and respect for intellectual property. Misuse can lead to plagiarism, which carries serious academic and professional consequences.

9. Tools for Managing Quotes


Utilize tools like citation generators and plagiarism checkers to manage quotes effectively. These tools help ensure proper formatting and originality in your writing.



Conclusion


Quotes are invaluable in enriching content, providing evidence, and conveying complex ideas succinctly. When used appropriately, they enhance the quality and credibility of your writing. Always ensure relevance, proper integration, and ethical usage to maximize their impact.


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