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If All The Churches Of Europe Closed Their Doors Until The Drums Ceased Rolling They Would Act As A Most Powerful Reminder That Though The Glory Of War Is A Famous And Ancient Glory, It Is Not The Final Glory Of God.

-George Bernard Shaw

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If All The Churches

George Bernard Shaw

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If All The Churches Of Europe Closed Their Doors Until The Drums Ceased Rolling They Would Act As A Most Powerful Reminder That Though The Glory Of War Is A Famous And Ancient Glory, It Is Not The Final Glory Of God.

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You Don't Expect Me To Know What To Say About A Play When I Don't Know Who The Author Is, Do You? . . . If It's By A Good Author, It's A Good Play, Naturally. That Stands To Reason.

Here There Is No Hope, And Consequently No Duty, No Work, Nothing To Be Gained By Praying, Nothing To Be Lost By Doing What You Like. Hell, In Short, Is A Place Where You Have Nothing To Do But Amuse Yourself.

My Way Of Joking Is To Tell The Truth

Though I Can Make My Extravaganzas Appear Credible, I Cannot Make The Truth Appear So.

In The Middle Ages People Believed That The Earth Was Flat, For Which They Had At Least The Evidence Of Their Senses: We Believe It To Be Round, Not Because As Many As 1 Percent Of Us Could Give Physical Reasons For So Quaint A Belief, But Because Modern Science Has Convinced Us That Nothing That Is Obvious Is True, And That Everything That Is Magical, Improbable, Extraordinary, Gigantic, Microscopic, Heartless, Or Outrageous Is Scientific.

Better Never Than Late.

Men Are Not Governed By Justice, But By Law Or Persuasion. When They Refuse To Be Governed By Law Or Persuasion, They Have To Be Governed By Force Or Fraud, Or Both.

All Progress Depends Upon The Unreasonable Person.

Discussing Vaccination With A Doctor Is Like Discussing Vegetarianism With A Butcher.

A Critic Recently Described Me, With Deadly Acuteness, As Having 'a Kindly Dislike Of My Fellow-creatures.' Perhaps Dread Would Have Been Nearer The Mark Than Dislike; For Man Is The Only Animal Of Which I Am Thoroughly And Cravenly Afraid.

The Notion That Inspiration Is Something That Happened Thousands Of Years Ago, And Was Then Finished And Done With. . . The Theory That God Retired From Business At That Period And Has Not Been Heard From Since, Is As Silly As It Is Blasphemous.

The Camera Can Represent Flesh So Superbly That, If I Dared, I Would Never Photograph A Figure Without Asking That Figure To Take Its Clothes Off.

A Man Never Tells You Anything Until You Contradict Him.

Marx's Kapital Is Not A Treatise On Socialism; It Is A Gerrymand Against The Bourgeoisie. It Was Supposed To Be Written For The Working Class, But The Working Man Respects The Bourgeoisie And Wants To Be A Bourgeoisie. Marx Never Got A Hold Of Him For A Moment. It Was The Revolting Sons Of The Bourgeoisie Itself, Like Myself, That Painted The Flag Red. The Middle And Upper Classes Are The Revolutionary Element In Society. The Proletariat Is The Conservative Element.

The Buried Truth Germinates And Breaks Through To The Light.

It Is Not Pleasure That Makes Life Worth Living. It Is Life That Makes Pleasure Worth Having.

Life Worth Living

The Law Is Equal Before All Of Us; But We Are Not All Equal Before The Law. Virtually There Is One Law For The Rich And Another For The Poor, One Law For The Cunning And Another For The Simple, One Law For The Forceful And Another For The Feeble, One Law For The Ignorant And Another For The Learned, One Law For The Brave And Another For The Timid, And Within Family Limits One Law For The Parent And No Law At All For The Child.

Only In Books Has Mankind Known Perfect Truth, Love And Beauty.

The Cinema Is Going To Form The Mind Of England. The National Conscience, The National Ideals And Tests Of Conduct, Will Be Those Of The Film.

Of All Human Struggles There Is None So Treacherous And Remorseless As The Struggle Between The Artist Man And The Mother Woman.

He Knows Nothing And Thinks He Knows Everything. That Points Clearly To A Political Career.

Love Is An Appetite Which, Like All Other Appetites, Is Destroyed For The Moment By Its Gratification.

If You Cannot Have What You Believe In You Must Believe In What You Have.

Animals Are My Friends... And I Don't Eat My Friends.

Decency Is Indecency's Conspiracy Of Silence

Absolute Honesty Is As Absurd An Abstraction As An Absolute Temperature Or An Absolute Value.

Disobedience, The Rarest And Most Courageous Of The Virtues, Is Seldom Distinguished From Neglect, The Laziest And Commonest Of The Vices.

I Choose Not To Make A Graveyard Of My Body For The Rotting Corpses Of Dead Animals.

The Whole World Is Strewn With Snares, Traps, Gins And Pitfalls For The Capture Of Men By Women.

I'm One Of The Undeserving Poor: That's What I Am. Think Of What That Means To A Man. It Means That He's Up Agen Middle Class Morality All The Time.... What Is Middle Class Morality? Just An Excuse For Never Giving Me Anything.

The Only Way For A Woman To Provide For Herself Decently Is For Her To Be Good To Some Man That Can Afford To Be Good To Her.

Consciousness Of A Fact Is Not Knowing It: If It Were, The Fish Would Know More Of The Sea Than The Geographers And The Naturalists.

Now That We Have Learned To Fly The Air Like Birds, Swim Under Water Like Fish, We Lack One Thing - To Learn To Live On Earth As Human Beings.

The Longer I Live, The More I Realize That I Am Never Wrong About Anything, And That All The Pains I Have So Humbly Taken To Verify My Notions Have Only Wasted My Time!

Patriotism Is Your Conviction That This Country Is Superior To All Others Because You Were Born In It.

Unbounded Hopes Were Placed On Each Successive Extension Of The Electoral Franchise, Culminating In The Enfranchisement Of Women.these Hopes Have Been Disappointed, Because The Voters, Male And Female, Being Politically Untrained And Uneducated, Have (a) No Grasp Of Constructive Measures; (b) Loathe Taxation As Such; (c) Dislike Being Governed At All; And (d) Dread And Resent Any Extension Of Official Interference As An Encroachment On Their Personal Liberty.

You Don't Get Tired Of Muffins, But You Don't Find Inspiration In Them.

The Writer Who Aims At Producing The Platitudes Which Are "not For An Age, But For All Time" Has His Reward In Being Unreadable Inall Ages.... The Man Who Writes About Himself And His Own Time Is The Only Sort Of Man Who Writes About All People And About All Time.

Dying Is A Troublesome Business: There Is Pain To Be Suffered, And It Wrings One's Heart; But Death Is A Splendid Thing -a Warfare Accomplished, A Beginning All Over Again, A Triumph. You Can Always See That In Their Faces.

If There Was Nothing Wrong In The World There Wouldn't Be Anything For Us To Do.

In The Arts Of Life Main Invents Nothing; But In The Arts Of Death He Outdoes Nature Herself, And Produces By Chemistry And Machinery All The Slaughter Of Plague, Pestilence And Famine. ... There Is Nothing In Man's Industrial Machinery But His Greed And Sloth: His Heart Is In His Weapons.

What Is Wrong With Priests And Popes Is That Instead Of Being Apostles And Saints, They Are Nothing But Empirics Who Say I Know Instead Of I Am Learning, And Pray For Credulity And Inertia As Wise Men Pray For Skepticism And Activity.

Pasteboard Pies And Paper Flowers Are Being Banished From The Stage By The Growth Of That Power Of Accurate Observation Which Is Commonly Called Cynicism By Those Who Have Not Got It...

Life Is Too Short For Men To Take It Seriously.

I'm Only A Beer Teetotaler, Not A Champagne Teetotaler; I Don't Like Beer.

I'm Not A Teacher: Only A Fellow Traveler Of Whom You Asked The Way. I Pointed Ahead - Ahead Of Myself As Well As You.

Marriage Is To Me Apostasy, Profanation Of The Sanctuary Of My Soul, Violation Of My Manhood, Sale Of My Birthright, Shameful Surrender, Ignominious Capitulation, Acceptance Of Defeat.

Grain By Grain, A Loaf. Stone Upon Stone, A Palace.

The Person I Miss Most Is The One I Could Have Been.

Could Have Been

I Do Not Want Actors And Actresses To Understand My Plays. That Is Not Necessary. If They Will Only Pronounce The Correct Sounds I Can Guarantee The Results.

Life Is A First Draft... With No Rewrite.

Only On Paper Has Humanity Yet Achieved Glory, Beauty, Truth, Knowledge, Virtue, And Abiding Love.

Civilized Society Is One Huge Bourgeoisie: No Nobleman Dares Now Shock His Greengrocer.

The Heart Of An Irishman Is Nothing But His Imagination

Every Dream Is A Prophecy: Every Jest Is An Earnest In The Womb Of Time.

O Lord! I Don't Know Which Is The Worst Of The Country, The Walking Or The Sitting At Home With Nothing To Do.

Girls, Like Men, Want To Be Petted, Pitied, And Made Much Of, When They Are Diffident, In Low Spirits, Or In Unrequited Love. These Are Services Which The Weak Cannot Render To The Strong And Which The Strong Will Not Render To The Weak, Except When There Is Also A Difference Of Sex.

Life Is A Constant Becoming: All Stages Lead To The Beginning Of Others.

We Have No More Right To Consume Happiness Without Producing It Than To Consume Wealth Without Producing It.

Better Keep Yourself Clean And Bright; You Are The Window Through Which You Must See The World.

Assassination Is The Extreme Form Of Censorship.

That Older And Greater Church To Which I Belong: The Church Where The Oftener You Laugh The Better, Because By Laughter Only Can You Destroy Evil Without Malice

Democracy Means The Organization Of Society For The Benefit And At The Expense Of Everybody Indiscriminately And Not For The Benefit Of A Privileged Class.

I Was Taught When I Was Young That If People Would Only Love One Another, All Would Be Well With The World. I Found When I Tried To Put That Into Practice, Not Only Were Other People Seldom Lovable But I Wasn't Very Lovable Myself.

Suppose The World Were Only One Of God's Jokes, Would You Work Any The Less To Make It A Good Joke Instead Of A Bad One?

Crime Is Only The Retail Department Of What, In Wholesale, We Call Penal Law.

It Is The End Of Happiness And The Beginning Of Peace.

It Is Long And Hard And Painful To Create Life: It Is Short And Easy To Steal The Life Others Have Made.

Don't Wait For The Right Opportunity: Create It.

We All Go About Longing For Love: It Is The First Need Of Our Natures, The Loudest Cry Of Our Hearts.

The Sound Body Is The Product Of The Sound Mind.

If You Eliminate Smoking And Gambling, You Will Be Amazed To Find That Almost All An Englishman's Pleasures Can Be, And Mostly Are, Shared By His Dog.

We Must All Share In The Evils Of The World Or Move To Another Planet.

Besides, Do Any Of Us Understand What We Are Doing? If We Did, Would We Ever Do It?

Our Political Experiment Of Democracy, The Last Refuge Of Cheap Misgovernment.

Nothing Remains Beautiful And Interesting Except Thought, Because The Thought Is The Life.

All Censorships Exist To Prevent Anyone From Challenging Current Conceptions And Existing Institutions. All Progress Is Initiated By Challenging Current Conceptions, And Executed By Supplanting Existing Institutions. Consequently, The First Condition Of Progress Is The Removal Of Censorship.

Except During The Nine Months Before He Draws His First Breath, No Man Manages His Affairs As Well As A Tree Does.

To Withhold Deserved Praise Lest It Should Make Its Object Conceited Is As Dishonest As To Withhold Payment Of A Just Debt Lest Your Creditor Should Spend The Money Badly.

My Religion? Well, My Dear, I Am A Millionaire. That Is My Religion.

Consistency Is The Enemy Of Enterprise, Just As Symmetry Is The Enemy Of Art.

You Can Lose A Man Like That By Your Own Death, But Not By His.

Death And Dying

An Idea That No One Believes Can Not Be Proved Too Often.

Why Not Give Christianity A Trial?

In Heaven An Angel Is Nobody In Particular.

Whisky Is Liquid Sunshine.

A Man's Interest In The World Is Only The Overflow From His Interest In Himself. When You Are A Child Your Vessel Is Not Yet Full;so You Care For Nothing But Your Own Affairs. When You Grow Up, Your Vessel Overflows; And You Are A Politician, A Philosopher, Or An Explorer And Adventurer. In Old Age The Vessel Dries Up: There Is No Overflow: You Are A Child Again.

It Is Doubtless Wise, When A Reform Is Introduced, To Try To Persuade The British Public That It Is Not A Reform At All; But Appearances Must Be Kept Up To Some Extent At Least.

He Said That Private Practice In Medicine Ought To Be Put Down By Law. When I Asked Him Why, He Said That Private Doctors Were Ignorant Licensed Murders.

Religion Is A Good Invention In Times Of Stress.

If You Do Things Merely Because You Think Some Other Fool Expects You To Do Them, And He Expects You To Do Them Because He Thinks You Expect Him To Expect You To Do Them, It Will End In Everybody Doing What Nobody Wants To Do, Which Is In My Opinion A Silly State Of Things.

I Myself Have Been Particularly Careful Never To Say A Civil Word To The United States. I Have Scoffed At Their Inhabitants As A Nation Of Villagers. I Have Defined The 100 % American As 99 % An Idiot. And They Adore Me.

Women Have Been A Ghastly Nuisance In My Life.

I Love Little Children Too But I Don't Cut Off Their Heads And Stick Them In Vases.

I Believe In The Discipline Of Silence, And Could Talk For Hours About It.

As You Say, I Am Honoured And Famous And Rich. But As I Have To Do All The Hard Work, And Suffer An Increasing Multitude Of Fools Gladly, It Does Not Feel Any Better Than Being Reviled, Infamous And Poor, As I Used To Be.

The Savage Bows Down To Idols Of Wood And Stone, The Civilized Man To Idols Of Flesh And Blood

I Shall Always Be A Flower Girl To Professor Higgins, Because He Always Treats Me As A Flower Girl, And Always Will; But I Know I Can Be A Lady To You, Because You Always Treat Me As A Lady, And Always Will.

Assassination On The Scaffold Is The Worst Form Of Assassination.

A True Artist Will Let His Wife Starve, His Children Go Barefoot, His Mother Drudge For His Living At Seventy, Sooner Than Work At Anything But His Art.

Life At Its Noblest Leaves Mere Happiness Far Behind; And Indeed Cannot Endure It. Happiness Is Not The Object Of Life: Life Has No Object: It Is An End In Itself; And Courage Consists In The Readiness To Sacrifice Happiness For An Intenser Quality Of Life.

To Me The Sole Hope Of Human Salvation Lies In Teaching Man To Regard Himself As An Experiment In The Realization Of God, To Regard His Hands As God's Hand, His Brain As God's Brain, His Purpose As God's Purpose. He Must Regard God As A Helpless Longing, Which Longed Him Into Existence By Its Desperate Need For An Executive Organ.

The Surest Way To Ruin A Man Who Doesn't Know How To Handle Money Is To Give Him Some.

I Must ... Warn My Readers That My Attacks Are Directed Against Themselves, Not Against My Stage Figures.

We Don't Bother Much About Dress And Manners In England, Because As A Nation We Don't Dress Well And We've No Manners.

A Child Hasn't A Grown-up Person's Appetite For Affection. A Little Of It Goes A Long Way With Them; And They Like A Good Imitation Of It Better Than The Real Thing, As Every Nurse Knows.

I Would Exchange Every Painting Of Christ For One Snapshot.

Imprisonment, As It Exists Today, Is A Worse Crime Than Any Of Those Committed By Its Victims.

Of All The Anti-social Vested Interests The Worst Is The Vested Interest In Ill-health.

I Was A Freethinker Before I Knew How To Think.

A Succession Of Eye-openers Each Involving The Repudiation Of Some Previously Held Belief.

I Never Thought Much Of The Courage Of A Lion Tamer. Inside The Cage He Is At Least Safe From People.

What A Heartbreaking Job It Is Trying To Combine Authors For Their Own Protection... The First Lesson I Learned Was That When You Take The Field For The Authors You Will Be Safer Without A Breastplate Than Without A Backplate.

In A Battle All You Need To Make You Fight Is A Little Hot Blood And The Knowledge That It's More Dangerous To Lose Than To Win.

It Is Not Enough To Know What Is Good: You Must Be Able To Do It.

The Ideal Love Affair Should Be Conducted By Post.

Popular Christianity Has For Its Emblem A Gibbet, For Its Chief Sensation A Sanginary Execution After Torture, For Its Central Mystery Is An Insane Vengeance Bought Off By A Trumpery Expiation. But There Is A Nobler And Profounder Christianity Which Affirms The Sacred Mystery Of Equality And Forbids The Glaring Futility And Folly Of Vengeance.

Lack Of Money Is The Root Of Of All Evil.

Greatest Wealth

The World Is Populated In The Main By People Who Should Not Exist

There Is At Bottom Only One Genuinely Scientific Treatment For All Diseases, And That Is To Stimulate The Phagocytes.

Compassion Is The Fellow-feeling Of The Unsound.

If A Group Of Beings From Another Planet Were To Land On Earth - Beings Who Considered Themselves As Superior To You As You Feel Yourself To Be To Other Animals - Would You Concede Them The Rights Over You That You Assume Over Other Animals?

That Is The Injustice Of A Woman's Lot. A Woman Has To Bring Up Her Children; And That Means To Restrain Them, To Deny Them Things They Want, To Set Them Tasks, To Punish Them When They Do Wrong, To Do All The Unpleasant Things. And Then The Father, Who Has Nothing To Do But Pet Them And Spoil Them, Comes In When All Her Work Is Done And Steals Their Affection From Her.

Everyone Can See That The People Who Hunt Are The Right People And The People Who Don't Are The Wrong Ones.

Nietzche . . . He Was A Confirmed Life Force Worshipper. It Was He Who Raked Up The Superman, Who Is As Old As Prometheus; And The 20th Century Will Run After This Newest Of The Old Crazes When It Gets Tired Of The World, The Flesh, And Your Humble Servant.

When You Loved Me I Gave You The Whole Sun And Stars To Play With. I Gave You Eternity In A Single Moment, Strength Of The Mountains In One Clasp Of Your Arms, And The Volume Of All The Seas In One Impulse Of Your Soul.

Ireland, Sir, For Good Or Evil, Is Like No Other Place Under Heaven, And No Man Can Touch Its Sod Or Breathe Its Air Without Becoming Better Or Worse.

Becoming Better

I Talk Democracy To These Men And Women. I Tell Them That They Have The Vote, And That Theirs Is The Kingdom And The Power And The Glory. I Say To Them You Are Supreme: Exercise Your Power. They Say, That's Right: Tell Us What To Do; And I Tell Them. I Say Exercise Our Vote Intelligently By Voting For Me. And They Do. That's Democracy; And A Splendid Thing It Is Too For Putting The Right Men In The Right Place.

We Are Members One Of Another; So That You Cannot Injure Or Help Your Neighbor Without Injuring Or Helping Yourself.

If The English Can Survive Their Food, They Can Survive Anything.

What, Or Who, Led You To Take Up Photography, And About What Date ? George Bernard Shaw – I Always Wanted To Draw And Paint. I Had No Literary Ambition. I Aspired To Be A Michelangelo, Not A Shakespeare. But I Could Not Draw Well Enough To Satisfy Myself; And The Instruction I Could Get Was Worse Than Useless. So When Dry Plates And Push Buttons Came Into The Market I Bought A Box Camera And Began Pushing The Button. It Was In 1898.

Higgins. Have You No Morals, Man? Doolittle [unabashed] Cant Afford Them, Governor. Neither Could You If You Was As Poor As Me.

A Soldier Is An Anachronism Of Which We Must Get Rid.

I Never Resist Temptation, Because I Have Found That Things That Are Bad For Me Do Not Tempt Me.

Home Is The Girl's Prison And The Woman's Workhouse.

This Is The True Joy In Life: Being Used For A Purpose Recognized By Yourself As A Mighty One, Being A Force Of Nature Instead Of A Feverish, Selfish Little Clod Of Ailments And Grievances, Complaining That The World Will Not Devote Itself To Making You Happy. I Am Of The Opinion That My Life Belongs To The Whole Community And As Long As I Live, It Is My Privilege To Do For It What I Can. It Is A Sort Of Splendid Torch Which I Have Got Hold Of For The Moment And I Want To Make It Burn As Brightly As Possible Before Handing It On To Future Generations.

There Is No Sincerer Love Than The Love Of Food.

The Apparent Multiplication Of Gods Is Bewildering At The First Glance, But You Soon Discover That They Are The Same God. There Is Always One Uttermost God Who Defies Personification. This Makes Hinduism The Most Tolerant Religion In The World, Because Its One Transcendent God Includes All Possible Gods. In Fact Hinduism Is So Elastic And So Subtle That The Most Profound Methodist, And Crudest Idolater, Are Equally At Home With It.

An Asylum For The Sane Would Be Empty In America.

The Notion That Persons Should Be Safe From Extermination As Long As They Do Not Commit Willful Murder, Or Levy War Against The Crown, Or Kidnap, Or Throw Vitriol, Is Not Only To Limit Social Responsibility Unnecessarily, And To Privilege The Large Range Of Intolerable Misconduct That Lies Outside Them, But To Divert Attention From The Essential Justification For Extermination, Which Is Always Incorrigible Social Incompatibility And Nothing Else.

All Sorts Of Bodily Diseases Are Produced By Half-used Minds.

The Possibilities Are Numerous Once We Decide To Act And Not React.

Decision Making

Women Upset Everything. When You Let Them Into Your Life, You Find That The Woman Is Driving At One Thing And You're Driving At Another.

Never Believe Anything A Writer Tells You About Himself. A Man Comes To Believe In The End The Lies He Tells Himself About Himself.

You Are My Inspiration And My Folly. You Are My Light Across The Sea, My Million Nameless Joys, And My Day's Wage. You Are My Divinity, My Madness, My Selfishness, My Transfiguration And Purification. You Are My Rapscallionly Fellow Vagabond, My Tempter And Star. I Want You.

The Great Secret...is Not Having Bad Manners Or Good Manners...but Having The Same Manner For All Human Souls.

A Man Has No Business To Marry A Woman Who Can't Make Him Miserable. It Means She Can't Make Him Happy.

The Only Secrets Are The Secrets That Keep Themselves.

Keeping Secrets

In The Arts Of Peace Man Is A Bungler.

Happiness And Beauty Are By-products.

Happiness And Beauty

I ... Must Continue To Strive For More Knowledge And More Power, Though The New Knowledge Always Contradicts The Old And The New Power Is The Destruction Of The Fools Who Misuse It.

If You Can't Get Rid Of The Skeleton In Your Closet, You'd Best Teach It To Dance.

The Policy Of Letting Things Alone, In The Practical Sense That The Government Should Never Interfere With Business Or Go Into Business Itself, Is Called Laisser-faire By Economists And Politicians. It Has Broken Down So Completely In Practice That It Is Now Discredited; But It Was All The Fashion In Politics A Hundred Years Ago, And Is Still Influentially Advocated By Men Of Business And Their Backers Who Naturally Would Like To Be Allowed To Make Money As They Please Without Regard To The Interest Of The Public.

If You Begin By Sacrificing Yourself To Those You Love, You Will End By Hating Those To Whom You Have Sacrificed Yourself.

I Work As My Father Drank.

I Am Justified. For I Chose Wisdom And The Knowledge Of Good And Evil ; And Now There Is No Evil; And Wisdom And Good Are One. It Is Enough.

I Have To Live For Others And Not For Myself: That's Middle-class Morality.

If You Can’t Appreciate What You’ve Got, You’d Better Get What You Can Appreciate.

A Veteran Journalist Has Never Had Time To Think Twice Before He Writes.

Some People Look At The World And Say 'why?' Some People Look At The World And Say 'why Not?'

Positive Thinking

The Truth Sticks In Our Throats With All The Sauces It Is Served With: It Will Never Go Down Until We Take It Without Any Sauce At All.

You Sometimes Have To Answer A Woman According To Her Womanliness, Just As You Have To Answer A Fool According To His Folly.

Those Who Are Looking For Paradise On Earth Should Come And See Dubrovnik.

Paradise On Earth

What Is Really Important In Man Is The Part Of Him That We Do Not Understand. Of Much Of It We Are Not Even Conscious, Just As We Are Not Normally Conscious Of Keeping Up Our Circulation By Our Heart-pump, Though If We Neglect It We Die.

I Learned Long Ago, Never To Wrestle With A Pig. You Get Dirty, And Besides, The Pig Likes It.

All Industries Are Brought Under The Control Of Such People [film Producers] By Capitalism. If The Capitalists Let Themselves Be Seduced From Their Pursuit Of Profits To The Enchantments Of Art, They Would Be Bankrupt Before They Knew Where They Were. You Cannot Combine The Pursuit Of Money With The Pursuit Of Art.

Do Not Do Unto Others As You Expect They Should Do Unto You. Their Tastes May Not Be The Same.

A Drama Critic Is A Man Who Leaves No Turn Unstoned.

To Be In Hell Is To Drift; To Be In Heaven Is To Steer.

Heaven, As Conventionally Conceived, Is A Place So Inane, So Dull, So Useless, So Miserable That Nobody Has Ever Ventured To Describe A Whole Day In Heaven, Though Plenty Of People Have Described A Day At The Seaside.

Most People Go To Their Grave With Their Music Inside Them.

Most Married Couples Spend The Whole Day Apart, The Woman In The House, The Man In The Office Or Study Or Workshop.

At Present There Is Not A Single Credible Established Religion In The World.

We're Human Beings We Are - All Of Us - And That's What People Are Liable To Forget. Human Beings Don't Like Peace And Goodwill And Everybody Loving Everybody Else. However Much They May Think They Do, They Don't Really Because They're Not Made Like That. Human Beings Love Eating And Drinking And Loving And Hating. They Also Like Showing Off, Grabbing All They Can, Fighting For Their Rights And Bossing Anybody Who'll Give Them Half A Chance.

The Notion That The Colonel Need Be A Better Man Than The Private Is As Confused As The Notion That The Keystone Need Be Stronger Than The Coping Stone.

Virtue Is Insufficient Temptation.

No Doubt It Is Easy To Demostrate That Property Will Destroy Society Unless Society Destroys It.

My Only Policy Is To Profess Evil And Do Good.

Silence Is The Most Perfect Expression Of Scorn.

Brigham Young Lived To Become Immortal In History As An American Moses By Leading His People Through The Wilderness Into An Unpromised Land.

The Best Reformers The World Has Ever Seen Are Those Who Commence On Themselves.

In Literature The Ambition Of The Novice Is To Acquire The Literary Language; The Struggle Of The Adept Is To Get Rid Of It.

Just Do What Must Be Done. This May Not Be Happiness, But It Is Greatness.

I Am Afraid We Must Make The World Honest Before We Can Honestly Say To Our Children That Honesty Is The Best Policy.

If All The Economists Were Laid End To End, They'd Never Reach A Conclusion.

It Is Ridiculous To Say That Art Has Nothing To Do With Morality. What Is True Is That The Artist's Business Is Not That Of The Policeman.

When Asked Which Dog Wins, He Reflected For A Moment And Replied, "the One I Feed The Most."

Native American

Effectiveness Of Assertion Is The Alpha And Omega Of Style.

Alpha And Omega

All Roads End At The Grave, Which Is The Gate To Nothingness.

The Right To Know Is Like The Right To Live. It Is Fundamental And Unconditional In Its Assumption That Knowledge, Like Life, Is A Desirable Thing.

Nothing Is Ever Done In This World Until Men Are Prepared To Kill One Another If It Is Not Done.

No Man Who Is Occupied In Doing A Very Difficult Thing, And Doing It Very Well, Ever Loses His Self-respect.

It Is Clear That A Novel Cannot Be Too Bad To Be Worth Publishing. . . . It Certainly Is Possible For A Novel To Be Too Good To Be Worth Publishing.

The Best Bought-up Children Are Those Who Have Seen Thier Parents As They Are. Hypocrisy Is Not The First Duty Of A Parent.

When Our Relatives Are At Home, We Have To Think Of All Their Good Points Or It Would Be Impossible To Endure Them.

A Perpetual Holiday Is A Good Working Definition Of Hell.

I Hate Performers Who Debase Great Works Of Art; I Long For Their Annihilation.

Women Are Called Womanly Only When They Regard Themselves As Existing Solely For The Use Of Men.

What Is Both Surprising And Delightful Is That The Spectators Are Allowed, And Even Expected, To Join In The Vocal Part Of The Game...there Is No Reason Why The Field Should Not Try To Put The Batsman Off His Stroke At The Critical Moment By Neatly Timed Disparagements Of His Wife's Fidelity And His Mother's Respectability.

For Nearly Twenty Years I Have Been A Published Author... But I Have Never Yet Seen A Book Of Mine Offered For Sale In A Shop Window.

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