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I Was Taught When I Was Young That If People Would Only Love One Another, All Would Be Well With The World. I Found When I Tried To Put That Into Practice, Not Only Were Other People Seldom Lovable But I Wasn't Very Lovable Myself.

-George Bernard Shaw

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I Was Taught When

George Bernard Shaw

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I Was Taught When I Was Young That If People Would Only Love One Another, All Would Be Well With The World. I Found When I Tried To Put That Into Practice, Not Only Were Other People Seldom Lovable But I Wasn't Very Lovable Myself.

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The Poor Silly-clever Irishman Takes Off His Hat To God's Englishman.

No King On Earth Is As Safe In His Job As A Trade Union Official. There Is Only One Thing That Can Get Him Sacked; And That Is Drink. Not Even That, As Long As He Doesn't Actually Fall Down.

You Propound A Complicated Arithmetical Problem: Say Cubing A Number Containing Four Digits. Give Me A Slate And Half An Hour's Time, And I Can Produce A Wrong Answer.

Don't Wait For The Right Opportunity: Create It.

Fashions, After All, Are Only Induced Epidemics.

Unbounded Hopes Were Placed On Each Successive Extension Of The Electoral Franchise, Culminating In The Enfranchisement Of Women.these Hopes Have Been Disappointed, Because The Voters, Male And Female, Being Politically Untrained And Uneducated, Have (a) No Grasp Of Constructive Measures; (b) Loathe Taxation As Such; (c) Dislike Being Governed At All; And (d) Dread And Resent Any Extension Of Official Interference As An Encroachment On Their Personal Liberty.

Though Justice Be Thy Plea, Consider This: That In The Course Of Justice None Of Us Should See Salvation. We Do Pray For Mercy, And That Same Prayer Doth Teach Us All To Render The Deeds Of Mercy.

To Disbelieve In Marriage Is Easy: To Love A Married Woman Is Easy; But To Betray A Comrade, To Be Disloyal To A Host, To Break The Covenant Of Bread And Salt, Is Impossible.

I Am Highly Susceptible To The Force Of All Truly Religious Music, Especially To The Music Of My Own Church, The Church Of Shelley, Michelangelo, And Beethoven.

There Is A Terrible Truthfulness About Photography That Sometimes Makes A Thing Look Ridiculous.

No Community Has Ever Yet Passed Beyond The Initial Phases In Which Its Pugnacity And Fanaticism Enabled It To Found A Nation, And Its Cupidity To Establish And Develop A Commercial Civilization.

Napoleon: What Shall We Do With This Soldier, Giuseppe? Everything He Says Is Wrong. Giuseppe: Make Him A General, Excellency, And Then Everything He Says Will Be Right.

Property, Said Proudhon, Is Theft. This Is The Only Perfect Truism That Has Been Uttered On The Subject.

Nowadays A Parlor Maid As Ignorant As Queen Victoria Was When She Came To The Throne Would Be Classed As Mentally Defective.

A Government That Robs Peter To Pay Paul Can Always Depend On The Support Of Paul.

Miracles, In The Sense Of Phenomena We Cannot Explain, Surround Us On Every Hand: Life Itself Is The Miracle Of Miracles.

Nothing Is Ever Done In This World Until Men Are Prepared To Kill One Another If It Is Not Done.

Success Does Not Consist In Never Making Mistakes But In Never Making The Same One A Second Time.

Censorship Ends In Logical Completeness When Nobody Is Allowed To Read Any Books Except The Books That Nobody Can Read.

The Statesman Cannot Govern Without Stability Of Belief, True Or False.

Only On Paper Has Humanity Yet Achieved Glory, Beauty, Truth, Knowledge, Virtue, And Abiding Love.

Every Doctor Will Allow A Colleague To Decimate A Whole Countryside Sooner Than Violate The Bond Of Professional Etiquette By Giving Him Away.

The World Was To Shakespeare A Great Stage Of Fools On Which He Was Utterly Bewildered. His Pregnant Observations Of Life Are Not Coordinated Into Any Philosophy.

The Novelties Of One Generation Are Only The Resuscitated Fashions Of The Generation Before Last.

It's Easier To Replace A Dead Man Than A Good Picture.

To Withhold Deserved Praise Lest It Should Make Its Object Conceited Is As Dishonest As To Withhold Payment Of A Just Debt Lest Your Creditor Should Spend The Money Badly.

The Jews Generally Give Value. They Make You Pay; But They Deliver The Goods. In My Experience The Men Who Want Something For Nothing Are Invariably Christians.

My Way Of Joking Is To Tell The Truth

Am Reserving Two Tickets For You For My Premiere. Come And Bring A Friend - If You Have One. Telegram Inviting Winston Churchill To Opening Night Of Pygmalion. Churchill Wired Back: Impossible To Be Present For The First Performance. Will Attend The Second - If There Is One.

[...] Any Fool Can Make A Discovery. Every Baby Has To Discover More In The First Years Of Its Life Than Roger Bacon Ever Discovered In His Laboratory.

I Have Defined The Hundred Per Cent American As Ninety-nine Per Cent An Idiot.

It Is Doubtless Wise, When A Reform Is Introduced, To Try To Persuade The British Public That It Is Not A Reform At All; But Appearances Must Be Kept Up To Some Extent At Least.

After Studying The Hungarian Language For Years, I Can Confidently Conclude That Had Hungarian Been My Mother Tongue, It Would Have Been More Precious. Simply Because Through This Extraordinary, Ancient And Powerful Language It Is Possible To Precisely Describe The Tiniest Differences And The Most Secretive Tremors Of Emotions.

We Call The One Side [of Humanity] Religion, And We Call The Other Science. Religion Is Always Right. ... Science Is Always Wrong; It Is The Very Artifice Of Men. Science Can Never Solve One Problem Without Raising Ten More Problems.

The Unconscious Self Is The Real Genius. Your Breathing Goes Wrong The Moment Your Conscious Self Meddles With It.

All Sorts Of Bodily Diseases Are Produced By Half-used Minds.

It Is The Mark Of A Truly Intelligent Person To Be Moved By Statistics.

Hollywood Keeps Before Its Child Audiences A String Of Glorified Young Heroes, Everyone Of Whom Is An Unhesitating And Violent Anarchist. His One Answer To Everything That Annoys Him Or Disparages His Country Or His Parents Or His Young Lady Or His Personal Code Of Manly Conduct Is To Give The Offender A "sock" In The Jaw.... My Observation Leads Me To Believe That It Is Not The Virtuous People Who Are Good At Socking Jaws.

My Situation Is A Solemn One: Life Is Offered To Me On The Condition Of Eating Beefsteaks. But Death Is Better Than Cannibalism. My Will Contains Directions For My Funeral, Which Will Be Followed, Not By Mourning Coaches, But By Oxen, Sheep, Flocks Of Poultry, And A Small Traveling Aquarium Of Live Fish, All Wearing White Scarves In Honor Of The Man Who Perished Rather Than Eat His Fellow Creatures. It Will Be, Without The Exception Of Noah's Ark, The Most Remarkable Thing Of Its Kind Ever Seen.

An Election Is A Moral Horror, As Bad As A Battle Except For The Blood; A Mud Bath For Every Soul Concerned In It.

Women Have Been A Ghastly Nuisance In My Life.

Everything I Eat Has Been Proved By Some Doctor Or Other To Be A Deadly Poison, And Everything I Don't Eat Has Been Proved To Be Indispensable For Life. But I Go Marching On.

I Myself Have Been Particularly Careful Never To Say A Civil Word To The United States. I Have Scoffed At Their Inhabitants As A Nation Of Villagers. I Have Defined The 100 % American As 99 % An Idiot. And They Adore Me.

It Is Monstrous That Custom Should Force Us To Display Our Faces Ostentatiously, However Worn And Wrinkled And Mean They May Be, Whilst Carefully Concealing All Our Other Parts, However Shapely And Well Preserved.

If You Cannot Attain Knowledge Without Torturing A Dog, You Must Do Without Knowledge.

Our Way Of Getting An Army Able To Fight The German Army Is To Declare War On Germany Just As If We Had Such An Army, And Then Trust To The Appalling Resultant Peril And Disaster To Drive Us Into Wholesale Enlistment.

We Must Always Think About Things, And We Must Think About Things As They Are, Not As They Are Said To Be.

And So, To The End Of History, Murder Shall Breed Murder, Always In The Name Of Right And Honor And Peace, Until The Gods Are Tired Of Blood And Create A Race That Can Understand.

Heaven, As Conventionally Conceived, Is A Place So Inane, So Dull, So Useless, So Miserable That Nobody Has Ever Ventured To Describe A Whole Day In Heaven, Though Plenty Of People Have Described A Day At The Seaside.

The Roulette Table Pays Nobody Except Him That Keeps It. Nevertheless A Passion For Gaming Is Common, Though A Passion For Keeping Roulette Tables Is Unknown.

The Moment We Face It Frankly We Are Driven To The Conclusion That The Community Has A Right To Put A Price On The Right To Live In It

Patriotism Is A Word Which Always Commemorates A Robbery.

The Policy Of Letting Things Alone, In The Practical Sense That The Government Should Never Interfere With Business Or Go Into Business Itself, Is Called Laisser-faire By Economists And Politicians. It Has Broken Down So Completely In Practice That It Is Now Discredited; But It Was All The Fashion In Politics A Hundred Years Ago, And Is Still Influentially Advocated By Men Of Business And Their Backers Who Naturally Would Like To Be Allowed To Make Money As They Please Without Regard To The Interest Of The Public.

Do Not Do Unto Others As You Expect They Should Do Unto You. Their Tastes May Not Be The Same.

Get Out Of My Way; For I Won't Stop For You.

The Liar's Punishment Is Not In The Least That He Is Not Believed, But That He Cannot Believe Anyone Else.

Civilization Is A Disease Produced By The Practice Of Building Societies With Rotten Material.

The Doctor Learns That If He Gets Ahead Of The Superstitions Of His Patients He Is A Ruined Man; And The Result Is That He Instinctively Takes Care Not To Get Ahead Of Them.

It's Not That I'm So Clever, It Is That Others Are So Stupid.

If There Was Twenty Ways Of Telling The Truth And Only One Way Of Telling A Lie, The Government Would Find It Out. It's In The Nature Of Governments To Tell Lies.

When You Loved Me I Gave You The Whole Sun And Stars To Play With. I Gave You Eternity In A Single Moment, Strength Of The Mountains In One Clasp Of Your Arms, And The Volume Of All The Seas In One Impulse Of Your Soul.

I Knew If I Waited Around Long Enough Something Like This Would Happen.

If You Begin By Sacrificing Yourself To Those You Love, You Will End By Hating Those To Whom You Have Sacrificed Yourself.

The Ideal Love Affair Should Be Conducted By Post.

But A Mother Is Like A Broomstick Or Like The Sun In The Heavens, It Does Not Matter Which As Far As One's Knowledge Of Her Is Concerned: The Broomstick Is There And The Sun Is There; And Whether The Child Is Beaten By It Or Warmed And Enlightened By It, It Accepts It As A Fact In Nature, And Does Not Conceive It As Having Had Youth, Passions, And Weaknesses, Or As Still Growing, Yearning, Suffering, And Learning.

Use Your Health, Even To The Point Of Wearing It Out. That Is What It Is For. Spend All You Have Before You Die; Do Not Outlive Yourself.

Hypocrisy ... Is Only Bad When It Is Improperly Used.

I Have Studied Him - The Wonderful Man - And In My Opinion Far From Being An Anti-christ He Must Be Called The Saviour Of Humanity.

Consciousness Of A Fact Is Not Knowing It: If It Were, The Fish Would Know More Of The Sea Than The Geographers And The Naturalists.

A Moderately Honest Man With A Moderately Faithful Wife, Moderate Drinkers Both, In A Moderately Healthy House: That Is The True Middle Class Unit.

It Is Dangerous To Be Sincere Unless You Are Also Stupid.

It Seems As Though Every Time You Learn Something New You Have To Give Up Something.

Life Would Be Tolerable But For Its Amusements.

When We Want To Read Of The Deeds That Are Done For Love, Whither Do We Turn? To The Murder Column.

When You Want To Put Something Into Your Part That Is Not In The Play, You Must Ask The Author-or Some Other Author-to Lead Up To The Interpolation For You. Never Forget That The Effect Of A Line May Depend Not On Its Delivery, But On Something Said Earlier In The Play, Either By Somebody Else Or By Yourself, And That If You Change It, It May Be Necessary To Change The Whole First Act As Well.

I'm One Of The Undeserving Poor: That's What I Am. Think Of What That Means To A Man. It Means That He's Up Agen Middle Class Morality All The Time.... What Is Middle Class Morality? Just An Excuse For Never Giving Me Anything.

Hell Is Full Of Musical Amateurs.

Clever And Attractive Women Do Not Want To Vote; They Are Willing To Let Men Govern As Long As They Govern Men.

What Is The Matter With The Rich Is Uselessness.

Riches And Poors

The Theory That Music Has A Depraving Effect On Morals Has Now Been Abandoned To The Old Women Of Both Sexes.

A Genius Is A Person Who Is Seeing Further And Probing Deeper Than Other People Has A Different Set Of Ethical Valuations From Their And Has Energy Enough To Give Effect To This Extra Vision And Its Valuations In Whatever Manner Best Suits His Or Her

When The World Goes Mad, One Must Accept Madness As Sanity; Since Sanity Is, In The Last Analysis, Nothing But The Madness On Which The Whole World Happens To Agree.

To Be In Hell Is To Drift; To Be In Heaven Is To Steer.

I Never Resist Temptation, Because I Have Found That Things That Are Bad For Me Do Not Tempt Me.

If You Do Not Say A Thing In An Irritating Way, You May As Well Not Say It At All Because People Will Not Trouble Themselves About Anything That Does Not Trouble Them.

Of All The Damnable Waste Of Human Life That Ever Was Invented, Clerking Is The Worst.

Better Keep Yourself Clean And Bright; You Are The Window Through Which You Must See The World.

It Is Long And Hard And Painful To Create Life: It Is Short And Easy To Steal The Life Others Have Made.

I Never Climbed Any Ladder: I Have Achieved Eminence By Sheer Gravitation.

Both Optimists And Pessimists Contribute To Society. The Optimist Invents The Aeroplane, The Pessimist The Parachute.

Pasteboard Pies And Paper Flowers Are Being Banished From The Stage By The Growth Of That Power Of Accurate Observation Which Is Commonly Called Cynicism By Those Who Have Not Got It...

Absolute Honesty Is As Absurd An Abstraction As An Absolute Temperature Or An Absolute Value.

The Chief Objection To Playing Wind Instruments Is That It Prolongs The Life Of The Player.

The Best Reformers The World Has Ever Seen Are Those Who Commence On Themselves.

Christianity Might Be A Good Thing If Anyone Ever Tried It.

I Am Oppressed With A Dread Of Living Forever. That Is The Only Disadvantage Of Vegetarianism.

Very Few People Can Afford To Be Poor.

Eternal Is The Fact That The Human Creature Born In Ireland And Brought Up In Its Air Is Irish. I Have Lived For Twenty Years In Ireland And For Seventy-two In England; But The Twenty Came First And In Britain I Am Still A Foreigner And Shall Die One.

If All The Statisticians In The World Were Laid Head To Toe, They Wouldn't Be Able To Reach A Conclusion

Even The Youngest Of Us May Be Wrong Sometimes.

If A Woman Rebels Against High-heeled Shoes, She Should Take Care To Do It In A Very Smart Hat

A Woman Whose Face Looked As If It Had Been Made Of Sugar And Someone Had Licked It.

A Nap, My Friend, Is A Brief Period Of Sleep Which Overtakes Superannuated Persons When They Endeavor To Entertain Unwelcome Visitors Or To Listen To Scientific Lectures.

All Artists Are Anarchists.

You Sometimes Have To Answer A Woman According To Her Womanliness, Just As You Have To Answer A Fool According To His Folly.

Just As The Liar 's Punishment Is, Not In The Least That He Is Not Believed , But That He Cannot Believe Any One Else; So A Guilty Society Can More Easily Be Persuaded That Any Apparently Innocent Act Is Guilty Than That Any Apparently Guilty Act Is Innocent.

If All You Are Going To Do In Life Are The Things That Are Convenient And Comfortable, The Great Things Never Get Done.

Of All The Anti-social Vested Interests The Worst Is The Vested Interest In Ill-health.

Just Do What Must Be Done. This May Not Be Happiness, But It Is Greatness.

Well, Sir, You Never Can Tell. That's A Principle In Life With Me, Sir, If You'll Excuse My Having Such A Thing.

When I Was Young, I Observed That Nine Out Of Ten Things I Did Were Failures. So I Did Ten Times More Work.

There Is Nothing So Bad Or So Good That You Will Not Find Englishmen Doing It; But You Will Never Find An Englishman In The Wrong. He Does Everything On Principle. He Fights You On Patriotic Principles; He Robs You On Business Principles; He Enslaves You On Imperial Principles; He Bullies You On Manly Principles; He Supports His King On Loyal Principles And Cuts Off His King's Head On Republican Principles.

I Sing, Not Arms And The Hero, But The Philosophic Man: He Who Seeks In Contemplation To Discover The Inner Will Of The World, Ininvention To Discover The Means Of Fulfilling That Will, And In Action To Do That Will By The So-discovered Means.

If The Announcer Can Produce The Impression That He Is A Gentleman, He May Pronounce As He Pleases.

Unless The Law Of Marriage Were First Made Human, It Could Never Become Divine.

A Thing That Nobody Believes Cannot Be Proved Too Often.

I Have Very Carefully Studied Islam And The Life Of Its Prophet (pbuh). I Have Done So Both As A Student Of History And As A Critic. And I Have Come To Conclusion That Muhammad (pbuh) Was Indeed A Great Man And A Deliverer And Benefactor Of Mankind Which Was Till Then Writhing Under The Most Agonising Pain.

Do Not Try To Live Forever. You Will Not Succeed.

If The Governments Devalue The Currency In Order To Betray All Creditors, You Politely Call This Procedure 'inflation'.

Is The Devil To Have All The Passions As Well As All The Good Tunes?

We Must Not Stay As We Are, Doing Always What Was Done Last Time, Or We Shall Stick In The Mud. Yet Neither Must We Undertake A New World As Catastrophic Utopians, And Wreck Our Civilization In Our Hurry To Mend It.

All Censorships Exist To Prevent Anyone From Challenging Current Conceptions And Existing Institutions. All Progress Is Initiated By Challenging Current Conceptions, And Executed By Supplanting Existing Institutions. Consequently, The First Condition Of Progress Is The Removal Of Censorship.

Woman Reduces Us All To The Common Denominator.

Faith In Reason As A Prime Motor Is No Longer The Criterion Of The Sound Mind, Any More Than Faith In The Bible Is The Criterion Of Righteous Intention.

Don't Ask Me For Promises Until I Know What I Am Promising.

Our Ideals, Like The Gods Of Old, Are Constantly Demanding Human Sacrifices.

The Truth Sticks In Our Throats With All The Sauces It Is Served With: It Will Never Go Down Until We Take It Without Any Sauce At All.

Defeatism Is The Wretchedest Of Policies.

You May Well Ask Me Why...i Took The Time To Write [books]. I Can Only Reply That I Do Not Know. There Was No Why About It. I Had To: That Was All.

Life Is A Constant Becoming: All Stages Lead To The Beginning Of Others.

Hell Is A Place Where You Have Nothing To Do But Amuse Yourself.

We Must All Share In The Evils Of The World Or Move To Another Planet.

To Endure The Pain Of Living, We All Drug Ourselves More Or Less With Gin, With Literature, With Superstitions, With Romance, With Idealism, Political, Sentimental, And Moral, With Every Possible Preparation Of That Universal Hashish: Imagination.

He Who Desires A Lifetime Of Happiness With A Beautiful Woman Desires To Enjoy The Taste Of Wine By Keeping His Mouth Always Full Of It.

I Have To Live For Others And Not For Myself: That's Middle-class Morality.

Martyrdom, Sir, Is What These People Like: It Is The Only Way In Which A Man Can Become Famous Without Ability.

Use Your Health, Even To The Point Of Wearing It Out.

Inspirational Health

An Idea That No One Believes Can Not Be Proved Too Often.

What Right Has Any Human Being To Talk Of Bringing Up A Child? You Do Not Bring Up A Tree Or A Plant. It Brings Itself Up. You Have To Give It A Fair Chance By Tilling The Soil.

The Only Person Who Acts Sensibly Is My Tailor. He Takes My Measure Anew Every Time He Sees Me. Everyone Else Goes By Their Old Measurements.

Oh, Well, If You Want Original Conversations, You'd Better Go And Talk To Yourself.

It Is Feeling That Sets A Man Thinking, And Not Thought That Sets Him Feeling.

Suppose The World Were Only One Of God's Jokes, Would You Work Any The Less To Make It A Good Joke Instead Of A Bad One?

What God Hath Joined Together No Man Shall Put Asunder: God Will Take Care Of That.

The Real Brahms Is Nothing More Than A Sentimental Voluptuary

Democracy Means The Organization Of Society For The Benefit And At The Expense Of Everybody Indiscriminately And Not For The Benefit Of A Privileged Class.

We Educate One Another; And We Cannot Do This If Half Of Us Consider The Other Half Not Good Enough To Talk To.

Not Good Enough

Only In The Problem Play Is There Any Real Drama, Because Drama Is No Mere Setting Up Of The Camera To Nature: It Is The Presentation In Parable Of The Conflict Between Man's Will And His Environment: In A Word, Of Problem.

I Learned Long Ago, Never To Wrestle With A Pig. You Get Dirty, And Besides, The Pig Likes It.

You Can Easily Find People Who Are Ten Times As Rich At Sixty As They Were At Twenty But Not One Of Them Will Tell You That They Are Ten Times As Happy

There Was Only One Virtue, Pugnacity; Only One Vice, Pacifism. That Is An Essential Condition Of War.

I Am Very Subtle; But Man Is Deeper In His Thought Than I Am. The Woman Knows That There Is No Such Thing As Nothing: The Man Knows That There Is No Such Day As Tomorrow. I Do Well To Worship Them.

But Whether The Risks To Which Liberty Exposes Us Are Moral Or Physical Our Right To Liberty Involves The Right To Run Them. A Man Who Is Not Free To Risk His Neck As An Aviator Or His Soul As A Heretic Is Not Free At All; And The Right To Liberty Begins, Not At The Age Of 21 Years But 21 Seconds.

You Can Be A Thorough-going Neo-darwinian Without Imagination, Metaphysics, Poetry, Conscience, Or Decency. For 'natural Selection' Has No Moral Significance: It Deals With That Part Of Evolution Which Has No Purpose, No Intelligence, And Might More Appropriately Be Called Accidental Selection, Or Better Still, Unnatural Selection, Since Nothing Is More Unnatural Than An Accident. If It Could Be Proved That The Whole Universe Had Been Produced By Such Selection, Only Fools And Rascals Could Bear To Live.

Gambling Promises The Poor What Property Performs For The Rich-something For Nothing.

All Great Art And Literature Is Propaganda.

A Man's Own Self Is The Last Person To Believe In Him, And Is Harder To Cheat Than The Rest Of The World.

To A Mathematician The Eleventh Means Only A Single Unit: To The Bushman Who Cannot Count Further Than His Ten Fingers It Is An Incalculable Myriad.

First Really Like Is Just A Little Bit Foolishness As Well As A Lot Of Curiosity. No Actually Self-respecting Girl Would Reap The Benefits Of It.

My Reputation Grows With Every Failure.

Learning From Failure

There Is No Satisfaction In Hanging A Man Who Does Not Object To It.

Treat Persons Who Profess To Be Able To Cure Disease As You Treat Fortune Tellers.

Would The World Ever Have Been Made If Its Maker Had Been Afraid Of Making Trouble?making Life Means Making Trouble. There’s Only One Way Of Escaping Trouble; And That’s Killing Things.

The Whole World Is Strewn With Snares, Traps, Gins And Pitfalls For The Capture Of Men By Women.

There Are Scores Of Thousands Of Human Insects Who Are Ready At A Moment's Notice To Reveal The Will Of God On Every Possible Subject

It Is Impossible For An Englishman To Open His Mouth Without Making Some Other Englishman Hate Or Despise Him.

In A Stupid Nation The Man Of Genius Becomes A God : Everybody Worships Him And Nobody Does His Will.

A Man Learns To Skate By Staggering About And Making A Fool Of Himself. Indeed He Progresses In All Things By Resolutely Making A Fool Of Himself.

If Ever I Utter An Oath Again May My Soul Be Blasted To Eternal Damnation!

I Do Not Waste My Time Writing Pot-boilers: The Pot Must Be Boiled, And Even My Pot Au Feu Has Some Chunks Of Fresh Meat In It. ...i Have No Time To Boil Myself Down; And Anyhow I Could Not Do So And Preserve All The Necessary Nutriment And The Flavoring On Which The Digestibility Depends.

Marriage Is The Most Licentious Of Human Institutions.

What Is Any Respectable Girl Brought Up To Do But To Catch Some Rich Man's Fancy And Get The Benefit Of His Money By Marrying Him?--as If A Marriage Ceremony Could Make Any Difference In The Right Or Wrong Of The Thing!

For Nearly Twenty Years I Have Been A Published Author... But I Have Never Yet Seen A Book Of Mine Offered For Sale In A Shop Window.

Let Not The Right Side Of Your Brain Know What The Left Side Doeth.

Islam Is The Best Religion And Muslims Are The Worst Followers

No Sooner Had Jesus Knocked Over The Dragon Of Superstition Than Paul Boldly Set It On Its Legs Again In The Name Of Jesus.

In Your Dread Of Dictators You Established A State Of Society In Which Every Ward Boss Is A Dictator, Every Private Employer A Dictator, Every Financier A Dictator, All With The Livelihood Of The Workers At His Mercy, And No Public Responsibility.

If You Cannot Get Rid Of The Family Skeleton, You May As Well Make It Dance.

If Associations To Control Burglary And Murder Were Tolerated We Should Take It For Granted That The Members Should All Be Burglers And Murderers.

Conceive. That Is The Word That Means Both The Beginning In Imagination And The End In Creation.

Those Who Do Not Know How To Live Must Make A Merit Of Dying.

We Don't Bother Much About Dress And Manners In England, Because As A Nation We Don't Dress Well And We've No Manners.

A Broken Heart Is A Very Pleasant Complaint For A Man In London If He Has A Comfortable Income.

From Mozart I Learnt To Say Important Things In A Conversational Way.

The Great Secret...is Not Having Bad Manners Or Good Manners...but Having The Same Manner For All Human Souls.

A Married Man Forms Married Habits And Becomes Dependent On Marriage Just As A Sailor Becomes Dependent On The Sea.

The British Churchgoer Prefers A Severe Preacher Because He Thinks A Few Home Truths Will Do His Neighbors No Harm.

I'm Sick Of All The Reasonable People: They See All The Reasons For Doing Nothing

All Great Truth First Starts As Blasphemy.

I Love Little Children Too But I Don't Cut Off Their Heads And Stick Them In Vases.

Atrocities Are Not Less Atrocities When They Occur In Laboratories And Are Called Medical Research.

It Is Very Doubtful Whether Man Is Enough Of A Political Animal To Produce A Good, Sensible, Serious And Efficient Constitution. All The Evidence Is Against It.

Religion Is A Good Invention In Times Of Stress.

The Universal Regard For Money Is The One Hopeful Fact In Our Civilization.

In My Dreams Is A Country Where The State Is The Church And The Church The People: Three In One And One In Three. It Is A Commonwealth In Which Work Is Play And Play Is Life: Three In One And One In Three. It Is A Temple In Which The Priest Is The Worshiper And The Worshiper The Worshipped: Three In One And One In Three. It Is A Godhead In Which All Life Is Human And All Humanity Divine: Three In One And One In Three.

The Plain Working Truth Is That It Is Not Only Good For People To Be Shocked Occasionally, But Absolutely Necessary To The Progress Of Society That They Should Be Shocked Pretty Often.

Progress Of Society

I Feel Nothing But The Accursed Happiness I Have Dreaded All My Life Long: The Happiness That Comes As Life Goes, The Happiness Of Yielding And Dreaming Instead Of Resisting And Doing, The Sweetness Of The Fruit That Is Going Rotten.

If In The Library Of Your House You Do Not Have The Works Of The Ancient Greek Writers, Then You Live In A House With No Light.

Imitation Is Not Just The Sincerest Form Of Flattery - It's The Sincerest Form Of Learning.

What Is Life But A Series Of Inspired Follies? The Difficulty Is To Find Them To Do. Never Lose A Chance: It Doesn’t Come Every Day.

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