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The Notion That The Colonel Need Be A Better Man Than The Private Is As Confused As The Notion That The Keystone Need Be Stronger Than The Coping Stone.

-George Bernard Shaw

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The Notion That The

George Bernard Shaw

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The Notion That The Colonel Need Be A Better Man Than The Private Is As Confused As The Notion That The Keystone Need Be Stronger Than The Coping Stone.

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We Mustn't Be Stiff And Stand-off, You Know. We Must Be Thoroughly Democratic, And Patronize Everybody Without Distinction Of Class.

There Are Two Things Necessary To Salvation.... Money And Gunpowder.

Whisky Is Liquid Sunshine.

Is The Devil To Have All The Passions As Well As All The Good Tunes?

Anarchism Is A Game At Which The Police Can Beat You.

Nature Holds No Brief For The Human Experiment; It Must Stand Or Fall By Its Results.

A Fashion Is Nothing But An Induced Epidemic.

Cruelty Must Be Whitewashed By A Moral Excuse, And Pretense Of Reluctance.

A Healthy Nation Is As Unconscious Of Its Nationality As A Healthy Man Of His Bones. But If You Break A Person's Nationality It Will Think Of Nothing Else But Getting It Set Again.

Very Few People Can Afford To Be Poor.

If You Cannot Attain Knowledge Without Torturing A Dog, You Must Do Without Knowledge.

Never Resist Temptation: Prove All Things: Hold Fast That Which Is Good.

Every Englishman Believes That Handel Now Occupies An Important Position In Heaven. If So, Le Bon Dieu Must Feel Toward Him Very Much As Louis Treize Felt Toward Richelieu.

No Use Slaving For Me And Then Saying You Want To Be Cared For: Who Cares For A Slave? If You Come Back, Come Back For The Sake Of Good Fellowship; For You’ll Get Nothing Else.

The Salvation Of The World Depends On The Men Who Will Not Take Evil Good-humouredly, And Whose Laughter Destroys The Fool Instead Of Encouraging Him.

The Apparent Multiplication Of Gods Is Bewildering At The First Glance, But You Soon Discover That They Are The Same God. There Is Always One Uttermost God Who Defies Personification. This Makes Hinduism The Most Tolerant Religion In The World, Because Its One Transcendent God Includes All Possible Gods. In Fact Hinduism Is So Elastic And So Subtle That The Most Profound Methodist, And Crudest Idolater, Are Equally At Home With It.

If You Say That God Is Good, Great, Blessed, Wise Or Any Such Thing, The Starting Point Is This : God Is.

Titles Distinguish The Mediocre, Embarrass The Superior, And Are Disgraced By The Inferior.

Life's No Brief Candle-it's A Splendid Torch!

I'm One Of The Undeserving Poor: That's What I Am. Think Of What That Means To A Man. It Means That He's Up Agen Middle Class Morality All The Time.... What Is Middle Class Morality? Just An Excuse For Never Giving Me Anything.

A Woman Whose Face Looked As If It Had Been Made Of Sugar And Someone Had Licked It.

Write Your Sad Times In Sand, Write Your Good Times In Stone.

Don't Wait For The Right Opportunity: Create It.

Go On Writing Plays, My Boy, One Of These Days One Of These London Producers Will Go Into His Office And Say To His Secretary, "is There A Play From Shaw This Morning?" And When She Says, "no," He Will Say, "well, Then We'll Have To Start On The Rubbish." And That's Your Chance, My Boy.

When God Created Man And Woman, He Did Not Take A Patent. That's Why Any Imbecile Has Been Able To Do So Ever Since.

Medical Science Is As Yet Very Imperfectly Differentiated From Common Cure-mongering Witchcraft

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Everybody Who Does Not Live In A Prostitute's Bed And On A Diet Of Cocaine Snow Is Called An Ascetic Nowadays.

Hell Is Not All Paved With Bad Intentions.

When I Speak Of The Case For Equality I Mean Human Equality; And That, Of Course, Can Only Mean One Thing: It Means Equality Of Income.

In The Right Key One Can Say Anything. In The Wrong Key, Nothing: The Only Delicate Part Is The Establishment Of The Key.

The Real Brahms Is Nothing More Than A Sentimental Voluptuary. Rather Tiresomely Addicted To Dressing Himself Up As Handel Or Beethoven And Making A Prolonged And Intolerable Noise.

I Do Not, Like The Fundamentalists, Believe That Creation Stopped Six Thousand Years Ago After A Week Of Hard Work. Creation Is Going On All The Time.

Any Man Who Is Not A Communist At The Age Of Twenty Is A Fool. Any Man Who Is Still A Communist At The Age Of Thirty Is An Even Bigger Fool.

Consciousness Of A Fact Is Not Knowing It: If It Were, The Fish Would Know More Of The Sea Than The Geographers And The Naturalists.

Be Like The Sun And Meadow, Which Are Not In The Least Concerned About The Coming Winter.

Nationalism Must Now Be Added To The Refuse Pile Of Superstitions. We Are Now Citizens Of The World, And The Man Who Divides The Race Into Elect Irishmen And Reprobate Foreign Devils (especially Englishmen) Had Better Live On The Blaskets Where He Can Admire Himself Without Disturbance.

During The Last Considerable Epidemic At The Turn Of The Century, I Was A Member Of The Health Committee Of London Borough Council, And I Learned How The Credit Of Vaccination Is Kept Up Statistically By Diagnosing All The Revaccinated Cases (of Smallpox) As Pustular Eczema, Varioloid Or What Not---except Smallpox.

If Despotism Failed Only For Want Of A Capable Benevolent Despot, What Chance Has Democracy, Which Requires A Whole Population Of Capable Voters.

Changeable Women Are More Endurable That Monotonous Ones; They Are Sometimes Murdered But Never Deserted.

When A Heretic Wishes To Avoid Martyrdom He Speaks Of "orthodoxy, True And False" And Demonstrates That The True Is His Heresy.

You Have Nothing To Do But Mention The Quantum Theory, And People Will Take Your Voice For The Voice Of Science, And Belive Anything.

When You Prevent Me From Doing Anything I Want To Do, That Is Persecution; When I Prevent You From Doing Anything You Want To Do, That Is Law, Order, And Morals.

When The Master Has Come To Do Everything Through The Slave, The Slave Becomes His Master, Since He Cannot Live Without Him.

The American Constitution, One Of The Few Modern Political Documents Drawn Up By Men Who Were Forced By The Sternest Circumstances To Think Out What They Really Had To Face, Instead Of Chopping Logic In A University Classroom.

Man Is The Only Animals Of Which I Am Thoroughly And Cravenly Afraid.

It Is The Mark Of A Truly Intelligent Person To Be Moved By Statistics.

It Is Courage, Courage, Courage, That Raises The Blood Of Life To Crimson Splendor.

Marriage Is The Most Licentious Of Human Institutions.

A Happy Family Is But An Earlier Heaven.

The More Ignorant Men Are, The More Convinced Are They That Their Little Parish And Their Little Chapel Is An Apex To Which Civilization And Philosophy Has Painfully Struggled Up The Pyramid Of Time From A Desert Of Savagery.

I Have My Own Soul. My Own Spark Of Divine Fire.

Tradition Will Accustom People To Any Atrocity

The Play Was A Great Success, But Audience Was A Dismal Failure.

The Doctor Learns That If He Gets Ahead Of The Superstitions Of His Patients He Is A Ruined Man; And The Result Is That He Instinctively Takes Care Not To Get Ahead Of Them.

The Harder I Work The More I Live.

Suppose The World Were Only One Of God's Jokes, Would You Work Any The Less To Make It A Good Joke Instead Of A Bad One?

A Part Of Eugenic Politics Would Finally Land Us In An Extensive Use Of The Lethal Chamber. A Great Many People Would Have To Be Put Out Of Existence Simply Because It Wastes Other People's Time To Look After Them.

Independence? That's Middle Class Blasphemy. We Are All Dependent On One Another, Every Soul Of Us On Earth.

It Is Nearly 50 Years Since I Was Assured By A Conclave Of Doctors That If I Did Not Eat Meat I Should Die Of Starvation.

The Most Tragic Thing In The World Is A Man Of Genius Who Is Not A Man Of Honor.

Unbounded Hopes Were Placed On Each Successive Extension Of The Electoral Franchise, Culminating In The Enfranchisement Of Women.these Hopes Have Been Disappointed, Because The Voters, Male And Female, Being Politically Untrained And Uneducated, Have (a) No Grasp Of Constructive Measures; (b) Loathe Taxation As Such; (c) Dislike Being Governed At All; And (d) Dread And Resent Any Extension Of Official Interference As An Encroachment On Their Personal Liberty.

That Is What All Poets Do: They Talk To Themselves Out Loud; And The World Overhears Them. But It's Horribly Lonely Not To Hear Someone Else Talk Sometimes.

If The Governments Devalue The Currency In Order To Betray All Creditors, You Politely Call This Procedure 'inflation'.

The Open Mind Never Acts: When We Have Done Our Utmost To Arrive At A Reasonable Conclusion, We Still Must Close Our Minds For The Moment With A Snap, And Act Dogmatically On Our Conclusions.

It Is A Noteworthy Fact That Kicking And Beating Have Played So Considerable A Part In The Habits Which Necessity Has Imposed On Mankind In Past Ages That The Only Way Of Preventing Civilized Men From Beating And Kicking Their Wives Is To Organize Games In Which They Can Kick And Beat Balls.

Most Of My Recent Plays Were Written In The Railway Train Between Hatfield And Kings Cross. I Write Anywhere, On The Top Of Omnibuses Or Wherever I May Be; It Is All The Same To Me.

Men Are Wise In Proportion, Not To Their Experience, But To Their Capacity For Experience.

Every Dream Is A Prophecy: Every Jest Is An Earnest In The Womb Of Time.

It Seems As Though Every Time You Learn Something New You Have To Give Up Something.

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Better Keep Yourself Clean And Bright; You Are The Window Through Which You Must See The World.

Poverty Does Not Produce Unhappiness: It Produces Degradation.

If Pity Is Akin To Love, Gratitude Is Akin To The Other Thing.

Very Nice Sort Of Place, Oxford, I Should Think, For People That Like That Sort Of Place.

The Indian Way Of Life Provides The Vision Of The Natural, Real Way Of Life. We Veil Ourselves With Unnatural Masks. On The Face Of India Are The Tender Expressions Which Carry The Mark Of The Creators Hand.

The Only Way For A Woman To Provide For Herself Decently Is For Her To Be Good To Some Man That Can Afford To Be Good To Her.

A Book Is Like A Child: It Is Easier To Bring It Into The World Than To Control It When It Is Launched There.

Get Married, But Never To A Man Who Is Home All Day.

Trade Unionism Is Not Socialism. It Is The Capitalism Of The Proletariat.

Words Are Only Postage Stamps Delivering The Object For You To Unwrap

I'm An Atheist And I Thank God For It.

Democracy Is A Device That Insures We Shall Be Governed No Better Than We Deserve.

I Know I Began As A Passion And Have Ended As A Habit , Like All Husbands .

The Difference Between A Lady And A Flower Girl Is Not How She Behaves, But How She’s Treated.

If You Can’t Appreciate What You’ve Got, You’d Better Get What You Can Appreciate.

As An Old Soldier, I Admit The Cowardice: It's As Universal As Seasickness, And Matters Just As Little.

I Want To Be Thoroughly Used Up When I Die, For The Harder I Work The More I Live. I Rejoice In Life For Its Own Sake.

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You'll Never Have A Quiet World Till You Knock The Patriotism Out Of The Human Race.

Treat Persons Who Profess To Be Able To Cure Disease As You Treat Fortune Tellers.

Every Fool Believes What His Teachers Tell Him, And Calls His Credulity Science Or Morality As Confidently As His Father Called It Divine Revelation.

I Sing, Not Arms And The Hero, But The Philosophic Man: He Who Seeks In Contemplation To Discover The Inner Will Of The World, Ininvention To Discover The Means Of Fulfilling That Will, And In Action To Do That Will By The So-discovered Means.

I Feel Nothing But The Accursed Happiness I Have Dreaded All My Life Long: The Happiness That Comes As Life Goes, The Happiness Of Yielding And Dreaming Instead Of Resisting And Doing, The Sweetness Of The Fruit That Is Going Rotten.

The Churches Must Learn Humility As Well As Teach It.

Dancing Is A Very Crude Attempt To Get Into The Rhythm Of Life.

I Also Made It Quite Clear That Socialism Means Equality Of Income Or Nothing, And That Under Socialism You Would Not Be Allowed To Be Poor. You Would Be Forcibly Feed, Clothed, Lodged, Taught, And Employed Whether You Like It Or Not. If It Were Discovered That You Had Not Character Enough To Be Worth All This Trouble, You Might Possibly Be Executed In A Kindly Manner; But Whilst You Were Permitted To Live You Would Have To Live Well.

A Moderately Honest Man With A Moderately Faithful Wife, Moderate Drinkers Both, In A Moderately Healthy House: That Is The True Middle Class Unit.

Human Misery Is So Appalling Nowadays That If We Allowed Ourselves To Dwell On It We Should Only Add Imaginary Miseries Of Our Own To The Real Miseries Of Others Without Doing Them Any Good.

The English Are Not A Very Spiritual People, So They Invented Cricket To Give Them Some Idea Of Eternity.

I Hope You Have Lost Your Good Looks, For While They Last Any Fool Can Adore You, And The Adoration Of Fools Is Bad For The Soul. No, Give Me A Ruined Complexion And A Lost Figure And Sixteen Chins On A Farmyard Of Crow's Feet And An Obvious Wig. Then You Shall See Me Coming Out Strong.

If Ever I Utter An Oath Again May My Soul Be Blasted To Eternal Damnation!

Liberty Is The Breath Of Life To Nations.

Happy Independence Day

Why, Except As A Means Of Livelihood, A Man Should Desire To Act On The Stage When He Has The Whole World To Act In, Is Not Clear To Me.

No Question Is So Difficult To Answer As That To Which The Answer Is Obvious.

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Problem Solving

Style Is Effectiveness Of Assertion.

There Is At Bottom Only One Genuinely Scientific Treatment For All Diseases, And That Is To Stimulate The Phagocytes.

I Try To Follow His Example, Not To Imitate Him.

In An Article On Bunyan Lately Published In The "contemporary Review" - The Only Article On The Subject Worth Reading On The Subject I Ever Saw (yes, Thank You, I Am Familiar With Macaulay's Patronizing Prattle About "the Pilgrim's Progress") Etc.

The Happiness Of Credulity Is A Cheap And Dangerous Quality.

If There Is A God

The Test To Which All Methods Of Treatment Are Finally Brought Is Whether They Are Lucrative To Doctors Or Not.

When You Want To Put Something Into Your Part That Is Not In The Play, You Must Ask The Author-or Some Other Author-to Lead Up To The Interpolation For You. Never Forget That The Effect Of A Line May Depend Not On Its Delivery, But On Something Said Earlier In The Play, Either By Somebody Else Or By Yourself, And That If You Change It, It May Be Necessary To Change The Whole First Act As Well.

You Have Set Up In New York Harbor A Monstrous Idol Which You Call Liberty. The Only Thing That Remains To Complete That Monument Is To Put On Its Pedestal The Inscription Written By Dante On The Gate Of Hell: All Hope Abandon Ye Who Enter Here.

Those Who Understand The Steam Engine And The Electric Telegraph Spend Their Lives In Trying To Replace Them With Something Better.

You May Well Ask Me Why...i Took The Time To Write [books]. I Can Only Reply That I Do Not Know. There Was No Why About It. I Had To: That Was All.

There Is Nothing On Earth More Exquisite Than A Bonny Book, With Well-placed Columns Of Rich Black Writing In Beautiful Borders, And Illuminated Pictures Cunningly Inset. But Nowadays, Instead Of Looking At Books, People Read Them. A Book Might As Well Be One Of Those Orders For Bacon And Bran.

Englishmen Never Will Be Slaves; They Are Free To Do Whatever The Government And Public Opinion Allow Them.

I Am Justified. For I Chose Wisdom And The Knowledge Of Good And Evil ; And Now There Is No Evil; And Wisdom And Good Are One. It Is Enough.

When You Find Something Funny Search It For Hidden Truth.

Don't Order Any Black Things. Rejoice In His Memory; And Be Radiant: Leave Grief To The Children. Wear Violet And Purple. Be Patient With The Poor People Who Will Snivel: They Don't Know; And They Think They Will Live For Ever, Which Makes Death A Division Instead Of A Bond.

If At Age 20 You Are Not A Communist Then You Have No Heart. If At Age 30 You Are Not A Capitalist Then You Have No Brains.

If I Refuse To Allow My Leg To Be Amputated, Its Mortification And My Death May Prove That I Was Wrong; But If I Let The Leg Go, Nobody Can Ever Prove That It Would Not Have Mortified Had I Been Obstinate. Operation Is Therefore The Safe Side For The Surgeon As Well As The Lucrative Side.

Even A Vortex Is A Vortex In Something. You Can't Have A Whirlpool Without Water; And You Can't Have A Vortex Without Gas, Or Molecules Or Atoms Or Ions Or Electrons Or Something, Not Nothing.

When People Shake Their Heads Because We Are Living In A Restless Age, Ask Them How They Would Like To Life In A Stationary One, And Do Without Change

Make Me A Beautiful Word For Doing Things Tomorrow; For That Surely Is A Great And Blessed Invention.

The Greatest Of Evils And The Worst Of Crimes Is Poverty.

Just As The Liar 's Punishment Is, Not In The Least That He Is Not Believed , But That He Cannot Believe Any One Else; So A Guilty Society Can More Easily Be Persuaded That Any Apparently Innocent Act Is Guilty Than That Any Apparently Guilty Act Is Innocent.

Geniuses Are Horrid, Intolerant, Easily Offended, Sleeplessly Self-conscious Men, Who Expect Their Wives To Be Angels With No Further Business In Life Than To Pet And Worship Their Husbands. Even At The Best They Are Not Comfortable Men To Live With; And A Perfect Husband Is One Who Is Perfectly Comfortable To Live With.

Of All The Damnable Waste Of Human Life That Ever Was Invented, Clerking Is The Worst.

Without Music We Shall Surely Perish Of Drink, Morphia, And All Sorts Of Artificial Exaggerations Of The Cruder Delights Of The Senses.

We Should Have Had Socialism Already, But For The Socialists, Am Quite Willing To Drop The Name If Dropping It Will Help Me To Get The Thing.

A Newspaper, Not Having To Act On Its Descriptions And Reports, But Only To Sell Them To Idly Curious People, Has Nothing But Honor To Lose By Inaccuracy And Non-veracity.

I Talk Democracy To These Men And Women. I Tell Them That They Have The Vote, And That Theirs Is The Kingdom And The Power And The Glory. I Say To Them You Are Supreme: Exercise Your Power. They Say, That's Right: Tell Us What To Do; And I Tell Them. I Say Exercise Our Vote Intelligently By Voting For Me. And They Do. That's Democracy; And A Splendid Thing It Is Too For Putting The Right Men In The Right Place.

Most Of The Money Given By Rich People In "charity" Is Made Up Of Conscience Money, "ransom," Political Bribery, And Bids For Titles.... One Buys Moral Credit By Signing A Cheque, Which Is Easier Than Turning A Prayer Wheel.

Few People Think More Than Two Or Three Times A Year; I Have Made An International Reputation For Myself By Thinking Once Or Twice A Week.

Morality Consists Of Suspecting Other People Of Not Being Legally Married.

A Life Spent Making Mistakes Is Not Only More Honorable, But More Useful Than A Life Spent Doing Nothing.

Everyone Can See That The People Who Hunt Are The Right People And The People Who Don't Are The Wrong Ones.

All Progress Depends Upon The Unreasonable Person.

Those Who Understand Evil Pardon It.

It Is Said That Every People Has The Government It Deserves. It Is More To The Point That Every Government Has The Electorate It Deserves; For The Orator Of The Front Bench Can Edify Or Debauch An Ignorant Electorate At Will.

There Is No Accomplishment So Easy To Acquire As Politeness And None More Profitable.

I Am Giving You Examples Of The Fact That This Creature Man, Who In His Own Selfish Affairs Is A Coward To The Backbone, Will Fight For An Idea Like A Hero. . . . I Tell You, Gentlemen, If You Can Shew A Man A Piece Of What He Now Calls God's Work To Do, And What He Will Later Call By Many New Names, You Can Make Him Entirely Reckless Of The Consequences To Himself Personally.

From Mozart I Learnt To Say Important Things In A Conversational Way.

Brains Are Not Everything.

Of All Human Struggles There Is None So Treacherous And Remorseless As The Struggle Between The Artist Man And The Mother Woman.

All Government Is Cruel; For Nothing Is So Cruel As Impunity.

Experience Is A Wonderful Thing. It Enables You To Recognize A Mistake When You Make It Again. If All Economists Were Laid End To End They Would Not Reach A Conclusion.

Only On Paper Has Humanity Yet Achieved Glory, Beauty, Truth, Knowledge, Virtue, And Abiding Love.

The Love Of Economy Is The Root Of All Virtue.

The Fact Is That The Intrinsic Worth Of The Book, Play Or Whatever The Author Is Trying To Sell Is The Least, Last Factor In The The Whole Transaction.

Instead Of Otello Being An Italian Opera Written In The Style Of Shakespeare, Othello Is A Play Written By Shakespeare In The Style Of Italian Opera.

With The Single Exception Of Homer, There Is No Eminent Writer, Not Even Sir Walter Scott, Whom I Can Despise So Entirely As I Despise Shakespeare When I Measure My Mind Against His. . . . It Would Positively Be A Relief To Me To Dig Him Up And Throw Stones At Him.

All My Life Affection Has Been Showered Upon Me, And Every Forward Step I Have Made Has Been Taken In Spite Of It.

Englishmen Hate Liberty And Equality Too Much To Understand Them. But Every Englishman Loves A Pedigree.

We Cut The Throat Of A Calf And Hang It Up By The Heels To Bleed To Death So That Our Veal Cutlet May Be White; We Nail Geese To A Board And Cram Them With Food Because We Like The Taste Of Liver Disease; We Tear Birds To Pieces To Decorate Our Women's Hats; We Mutilate Domestic Animals For No Reason At All Except To Follow An Instinctively Cruel Fashion; And We Connive At The Most Abominable Tortures In The Hope Of Discovering Some Magical Cure For Our Own Diseases By Them.

The Lesson Intended By An Author Is Hardly Ever The Lesson The World Chooses To Learn From His Book.

After Studying The Hungarian Language For Years, I Can Confidently Conclude That Had Hungarian Been My Mother Tongue, It Would Have Been More Precious. Simply Because Through This Extraordinary, Ancient And Powerful Language It Is Possible To Precisely Describe The Tiniest Differences And The Most Secretive Tremors Of Emotions.

If In The Library Of Your House You Do Not Have The Works Of The Ancient Greek Writers, Then You Live In A House With No Light.

Hell Is A Place Where You Have Nothing To Do But Amuse Yourself.

He Who Bears The Brand Of Cain Shall Rule The Earth.

The Stock Actor Is A Stage Calamity

Effectiveness Of Assertion Is The Alpha And Omega Of Style.

Alpha And Omega

When A Prisoner Sees The Door Of His Dungeon Open, He Dashes For It Without Stopping To Think Where He Shall Get His Dinner Outside.

You Are Going To Let The Fear Of Poverty Govern You Life And Your Reward Will Be That You Will Eat, But You Will Not Live.

The More Things A Man Is Ashamed Of, The More Respectable He Is.

My Schooling Did Me A Great Deal Of Harm And No Good Whatever; It Was Simply Dragging A Child's Soul Through The Dirt.

If You Must Hold Yourself Up To Your Children As An Object Lesson, Hold Yourself Up As A Warning And Not As An Example.

When The Military Man Approaches, The World Locks Up Its Spoons And Packs Off Its Womankind.

Imprisonment Is As Irrevocable As Death.

There Was Only One Virtue, Pugnacity; Only One Vice, Pacifism. That Is An Essential Condition Of War.

People Have Pointed Out Evidences Of Personal Feeling In My Notices As If They Were Accusing Me Of A Misdemeanor, Not Knowing That Criticism Written Without Personal Feeling Is Not Worth Reading. It Is The Capacity For Making Good Or Bad Art A Personal Matter That Makes A Man A Critic.

It's All That The Young Can Do For The Old, To Shock Them And Keep Them Up To Date.

It's Usually Pointed Out That Women Are Not Fit For Political Power, And Ought Not To Be Trusted With A Vote Because They Are Politically Ignorant, Socially Prejudiced, Narrow-minded, And Selfish. True Enough, But Precisely The Same Is True Of Men!

I Hate The Poor And Look Forward Eagerly To Their Extermination.

What A Heartbreaking Job It Is Trying To Combine Authors For Their Own Protection... The First Lesson I Learned Was That When You Take The Field For The Authors You Will Be Safer Without A Breastplate Than Without A Backplate.

In A Battle All You Need To Make You Fight Is A Little Hot Blood And The Knowledge That It's More Dangerous To Lose Than To Win.

A Conquered Nation Is Like A Man With Cancer: He Can Think Of Nothing Else.

Physically There Is Nothing To Distinguish Human Society From The Farm-yard Except That Children Are More Troublesome And Costly Than Chickens And Calves And That Men And Women Are Not So Completely Enslaved As Farm Stock.

Martyrdom Is The Only Path To Immortality That Requires No Talent Whatsoever.

The Moment We Face It Frankly We Are Driven To The Conclusion That The Community Has A Right To Put A Price On The Right To Live In It ... If People Are Fit To Live, Let Them Live Under Decent Human Conditions. If They Are Not Fit To Live, Kill Them In A Decent Human Way. Is It Any Wonder That Some Of Us Are Driven To Prescribe The Lethal Chamber As The Solution For The Hard Cases Which Are At Present Made The Excuse For Dragging All The Other Cases Down To Their Level, And The Only Solution That Will Create A Sense Of Full Social Responsibility In Modern Populations?

You Can Always Tell An Old Soldier By The Inside Of His Holsters And Cartridge Boxes. The Young Ones Carry Pistols And Cartridges; The Old Ones, Grub.

Woman Reduces Us All To The Common Denominator.

We All Have--to Put It As Nicely As I Can--our Lower Centres And Our Higher Centres. Our Lower Centres Act: They Act With Terriblepower That Sometimes Destroys Us; But They Don't Talk.... Since The War The Lower Centres Have Become Vocal. And The Effect Is That Of An Earthquake. For They Speak Truths That Have Never Been Spoken Before--truths That The Makers Of Our Domestic Institutions Have Tried To Ignore.

She Is Immensely Interested In Him. She Has Even Secret Mischievous Moments In Which She Wishes She Could Get Him Alone, On A Desert Island, Away From All Ties And With Nobody Else In The World To Consider, And Just Drag Him Off His Pedestal And See Him Making Love Like Any Common Man.

People Get Tired Of Everything, And Of Nothing Sooner Than Of What They Most Like.

If All The Statisticians In The World Were Laid Head To Toe, They Wouldn't Be Able To Reach A Conclusion

Baseball Has The Great Advantage Over Cricket Of Being Sooner Ended.

There Is Nothing So Bad Or So Good That You Will Not Find Englishmen Doing It; But You Will Never Find An Englishman In The Wrong. He Does Everything On Principle.

Home Life Is No More Natural To Us Than A Cage Is Natural To A Cockatoo.

Though The Life Force Supplies Us With Its Own Purpose, It Has No Other Brains To Work With Than Those It Has Painfully And Imperfectly Evolved In Our Heads.

The World Was To Shakespeare A Great Stage Of Fools On Which He Was Utterly Bewildered. His Pregnant Observations Of Life Are Not Coordinated Into Any Philosophy.

A Critic Recently Described Me, With Deadly Acuteness, As Having 'a Kindly Dislike Of My Fellow-creatures.' Perhaps Dread Would Have Been Nearer The Mark Than Dislike; For Man Is The Only Animal Of Which I Am Thoroughly And Cravenly Afraid.

Freedom, My Good Girl, Means Being Able To Count On How Other People Will Behave.

Love Is An Appetite Which, Like All Other Appetites, Is Destroyed For The Moment By Its Gratification.

It Is The End Of Happiness And The Beginning Of Peace.

If More Than Ten Percent Of The Public Likes A Painting, It Should Be Burned.

A Great Social Reformer.

Both Optimists And Pessimists Contribute To Society. The Optimist Invents The Aeroplane, The Pessimist The Parachute.

Marriage Is An Alliance Entered Into By A Man Who Can't Sleep With The Window Shut, And A Woman Who Can't Sleep With The Window Open.

Taxes Are The Chief Business Of A Conqueror Of The World.

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