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Even If It's Such A Lowly Art As Tv, You've Got To Get Stuff Off Your Chest, Because That's What Makes Something Different And Original, Your Particular Take On Stuff.

-Ricky Gervais

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Even If It's Such

Ricky Gervais

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Even If It's Such A Lowly Art As Tv, You've Got To Get Stuff Off Your Chest, Because That's What Makes Something Different And Original, Your Particular Take On Stuff.

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I Can't Stand It. I Can't Stand Someone Being Embarrassed. I Don't Know Why. If Someone Slips Over And The First Thing They Do Is Look Around, I Pretend I Haven't Seen It.

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Fact Is Stranger Than Fiction. You See People Walking Down The Street That Would Never Be Allowed On Television. You Have To Tone It Down.

When You Think Of Things Like The Sopranos, The Wire, Damages, They Are Beating Film On A Regular Basis. Most Films Are Terrible. It's Only The 2% That Are Good. There's Things You Can Do On Tv Which You Can't Do On Film. There Is Something About Those Episodic, Serialisations That Are Grand And Operatic.

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We Didn't Evolve; God Made Us. So I Just Want To Explain To You Exactly How That Happened... Some Of The Things You'll Hear Do Sound A Little Bit Far-fetched. I Admit That. Then I Found Out That The Other Name For The Bible Is The Gospel, So It Is All True. Luckily, The Clue Is In The Title.

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I Feel Sorry For People In Power. I Feel Sorry For The Queen, In A Way, That She Hasn't Had A Normal Life. It'd Difficult For Me To Hate Anyone. Immediately Someone's Unpopular, I Feel Sorry For Them.

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There Are So Many Films Now Where You Know The Story Is A Supporting Role To The Visual Effects.

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Just Because You're Offended, Doesn't Mean You're Right.

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Someone Asked Me What Three Things I Would Save If My House Was On Fire. I Said My Cat, My Salamander And One Of The Twins.

To Complain About Critics In A Business Is Like A Sailor Complaining About The Waves. Go Back To The Beach If You Don't Like It.

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Same Sex Marriage Isn't Gay Privilege, It's Equal Rights. Privilege Would Be Something Like Gay People Not Paying Taxes. Like Churches Don't.

I've Never Regretted Saying No To Anything, Or Finishing Something. When I'm In The Middle Of Doing Something I Love, I Can Have A Better Idea, And I'll Go, "oh God, I Can't Finish This." Maybe I've Got Some Sort Of Disorder.

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I See Atheists Are Fighting And Killing Each Other Again, Over Who Doesn't Believe In Any God The Most. Oh, No..wait.. That Never Happens.

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Unlike Religious People, I Look At All Religions Equally.

When People Say To Me: Would You Rather Be Thought Of As A Funny Man Or A Great Boss? My Answer's Always The Same, To Me, They're Not Mutually Exclusive.

The Grass Isn't Always Greener On The Other Side!

Grass Is Greener On The Other Side

I Still See Myself As A Bit Of A Cottage Industry. Being In A Room Creating Stuff And Seeing If Anyone Wants It, As Opposed To Going To Work For Someone.

Know Your Limitations And Be Content With Them. Too Much Ambition Results In Promotion To A Job You Can't Do.

The Service In L.a. Is The Best. You Don't Get Sarcastic, Surly, Fed-up Waiters And Waitresses Like You Do In England. They're Good At Their Job And They're There For The Customer. The Only Depressing Thing Is A Lot Of Them Have Written More Screenplays Than Me.

I'm Basically A 'do Unto Others' Type Person. I Don't Have Any Religious Feelings Because I'm An Atheist, But I Live My Life Like There's A God. And If There Was He'd Probably Love Me.

Everyone Is Entitled To Their Opinion, But If You Believe In God, You're Wrong.

Spirituality Really Lost Its Way When It Became A Stick To Beat People With: ‘do This Or You’ll Burn In Hell.

You Try To Make Characters You Care About, And I Think Realism Helps. Even Though This Is A High Concept, The Characters Have Got To Be Real.

Our Challenge With "the Office" And "extras" Was To Get It Completely Scripted But To Find A Cast That Could Make It Look Like They Were Saying It For The First Time.

There's Nothing As Perfect As The Initial Idea. And The Only Reason I Write And Direct Is To Protect The Writing, Because That's What's Most Precious.

Everything You Do Is Autobiographical. Yeah, I Grew Up In A Town Called Redding And I Had Older Brothers And Sisters So It's All My Memories Of Growing Up.

Remember, No One Can Hurt Your Feelings Without Your Permission

The World Is Bigger Than All The Parts. That's The Important Thing, And One Thing Can Throw Everything Off Kilter. And You Must Never Let Yourself Off. You'll Let Yourself Off By Mistake. So You Shouldn't Do It Consciously. You Have To Be Above It All And Just Be Very Disciplined With It. Just Be Very Disciplined With It.

I Get So Sick Of People Asking: "what's Your Demographic?" Or: "oh We've Got To Aim This At..." No, You Have To Aim It At You. You Do The Thing You Would Love... Make The Thing You Would Love And Be Proud Of. There's Enough People In The World That, If You Do That And Do It Well As A Single Vision, They'll Go: "that's My Favourite Thing Ever!"

She Said, 'i'm Your Biggest Fan,' And I Said, 'who Are You?' She Said, 'paris Hilton.'

I'm Not From Around These Parts. I'm From A Little Place Called England: We Used To Run The World Before You.

I Use People's Real Voices Because I Want Realism. So Often I Mention The Actors' Physicality Because I Want It To Be Like A Real Documentary.

You Are The Result Of Billions Of Years Of Evolution. You Will Only Live For A Few Years And Will Never Exist Again. Absolutely Beautiful

I Always Chose All My Friends On Whether They Were Funny. What's A Better Way To Pass The Time Than Laughing Or Smiling?

Just Because You're Offended, Doesn't Mean You're Right. Some People Are Offended By Mixed Marriage, Gay People, Atheism. So What? F*** 'em.

I'm A Failed Pop Star. I Always Sneak A Song Into Everything I Do.

I've Never Worked Out What The Moral Of Humpty Dumpty Is. I Can Only Think Of: Don't Sit On A Wall, If You're An Egg.

I Think Everyone Has The Ability To Be Loved.

I Have To Be Excited, I Have To Have An Adrenaline Rush About Doing Something, Or It Bores Me, I Feel Trapped.

People Think That It's Fun To Meet Celebrities - But What Do You Mean By "celebrity"? Someone You Recognise? What Are They Famous For? It's People Who've Done Something That Are Exciting.

People See Me, And They See The Suit, And They Go: "you're Not Fooling Anyone", They Know I'm Rock And Roll Through And Through. But You Know That Old Thing, Live Fast, Die Young? Not My Way. Live Fast, Sure, Live Too Bloody Fast Sometimes, But Die Young? Die Old. That's The Way- Not Orthodox, I Don't Live By "the Rules" You Know.

Where There's A Will - There's A Relative!

You Want To See The People You've Sort Of Come To Know And Love, Or Love To Hate, You Want To See Them Develop In Some Way. And I Hope People Get Sort Of Caught Up In That Arc.

I No Longer Needed A Reason For My Existence, Just A Reason To Live. And Imagination, Free Will, Love, Humor, Fun, Music, Sports, Beer, And Pizza Are All Good Enough Reasons For Living. But Living An Honest Life - For That You Need The Truth.

I've Always Dabbled. I've Always Nearly Written A Book, I've Always Tried Painting, I've Always Tried To Make Something Out Of Ideas, Really. It Was Never A Plan. I Never Thought, "right. First I'll Get Famous, And Then I'll Do A Book.

Dear Religion, This Week I Safely Dropped A Man From Space While You Shot A Child In The Head For Wanting To Go To School. Yours, Science.

Funny Bones, To Me, Are More Important Than Funny Lines. If A Comedian Is Just Not Likable And Doing The Lines, You Could Read Them Yourself. Whereas If Someone [you Like] Shambles Out, And They Tell You What A Bad Day They've Had, They Don't Have To Say Anything. I Love Them. I Want To Hug Them Because They've Been Through Something. And It Comes Back To Empathy, Always Empathy.

I Went To University With No Money. I Can't Understand A Society That Wouldn't Give A Poor Person The Same Opportunity As A Rich Person.

I Can't Find Someone Funny Whom I Don't Like. Hitler Told Great Jokes. I Didn't Find It Funny At All.

I'm Quite Squeamish, Really. I'm Philistine And Unsophisticated - Not Because Of My Great Discerning Palate But Other Reasons. Some Are Moral Grounds, Some Texture.

There's A Difference Between A Job And A Career - If You're The Boss You Don't Stop At Six O'clock, You Have To Worry About Everything All The Time.

That's What Being Nervous And Sort Of Out Of Your Comfort Zone Does. It's The Same In "the Office" When A Black Guy Comes To The Office And All He Thinks Is `i Better Show This Guy I'm Not A Racist.' So What Does He Do? Only Talks About Black Issues.

Popularity And Democracy Aren't A Judge, They're Just Stats.

In A Safe Western World Where We're Not Being Shot At And We're Not Starving, The Worst Thing That Happens To Us Most Days Is Someone's Rude To Us, Or We Accidentally Insult Someone. Social Faux Pas Is The Worst Thing That Happens To Most People, Most Days, So We've Got To Concentrate On That, Really.

I've Probably Done The Odd Thing. I've Probably Done More Than I Would Have Done And Some Things You Don't Say No To. You Don't Say No To Working With "the Simpsons"... The Greatest Comedy Show On Television. You Mustn't. Even Though Going To My Bad Judgment, I Remember Saying That All I Can Do Is Make This Show Slightly Worse.

It's Quite Easy To Make A Load Of People Laugh, It's Often A Reflex Action, But I Think To Make Them Cry Is Harder Without Manipulating Them.

Sometimes I'll Be Confident And Go Into A Shop And Say, "hello, Yeah, All Right," And Then The Next Day, If Someone Looks At Me Or Talks To Me, I Just Don't Know What To Do. If You're Walking Down The Street With A Baseball Cap, You Might Be Fine. But If You're In A Pub And You See Someone Look At You, You Think The Worst Thing In The World Now Is If They Come Over. It's A Really Weird Feeling.

You Do Your Own Thing And You See If You Survive.

A Joke Isn't Yours. It's Used And You Don't Know Where It's Been.

I Think The Best Advice I'd Say To Any Actor When You Do Comedy Is Play It Straight.

We Shouldn't Even Need The Word 'atheism'. If People Didn't Invent Ridiculous Imaginary Gods, Rational People Wouldn't Have To Deny Them.

Hollywood Is Responsible For Some Of The Greatest And Worst Movies Of All Time!

I Like Big Escapist Films. It's Odd Because The Type Of Comedian I Am And The Things I Do When I'm Writing And Directing Myself Usually Deal With The Darker Side Of The Human Psyche And Excruciating Social Faux Pas. I Often Deal In Taboos And The Subjects I Do As A Stand-up Are Quite Challenging. But My Film Roles Have Been Much More Fun And Escapist.

Do This Or You’ll Burn In Hell.

I'd Like To Thank God For Making Me An Atheist.

The Only Reason I Work Out Is So I Can Eat More Cheese.

Honor Is A Gift A Man Gives Himself. You Can Be As Good As Anyone That Ever Lived. If You Can Read, You Can Learn Everything That Anyone Ever Learned. But You've Got To Want It.

If You Pay Attention To Good Critics, You Have To Listen To The Bad. So You Have To Ignore Them All Really. You Can't Just Cherry Pick The Glowing Ones.

For Every Wacky Postcard, There's A Million People Waiting To Buy It, And For Every $10 Million Of Those Things, There's One Rembrandt. Purposely, I Think I Want To Aim At Doing Something That A Lot Of People Won't Like. I'm Just Worried That It Looks Like I've Compared My Work With Rembrandt. "gervais Says He's Better Than Rembrandt!".

There Was A Nobility In Poverty When I Was Growing Up. My Mom Was Poor But She Was Planting Roses And She Was Cleaning The Steps, You Know What I Mean. You Didn't Feel Sorry For Yourself.

There's No Difference Between Fame And Infamy Now. There's A New School Of Professional Famous People That Don't Do Anything. They Don't Create Anything.

A World Without Any Lies At All Is Not A Good World, Because It's Artless And Because There Are No White Lies, No Flattery.

The Best Way To Avoid Criticism Is Never Do Anything Ever. Or, Do What You Love, Have A Great Life & Let Others Spend Their Time Criticising.

When You Are Dead, You Do Not Know You Are Dead. It's Only Painful And Difficult For Others. The Same Applies When You Are Stupid.

Try Something. And Never Be Afraid To Fail. That Failure Is Useful Too. It's Just Another Building Block.

What Will It Feel Like After You Die? Exactly The Same As It Felt For Those Billions Of Years Before You Were Born.

I Never Think Of Myself As A Celebrity - Or Even An Actor, Actually. I Think Of Myself As A Writer-director.

I Like Every Part [of The Film Process ] Except The Business And Admin Stuff. The Initial Idea. Writing. Re-writing. Casting. Directing, Editing. If I Had To Chose I'd Say Writing, Followed By Putting Music On The Picture. That Is Magical.

Next Time Someone Tells Me They Believe In God, I'll Say 'oh Which One? Zeus? Hades? Jupiter? Mars? Odin? Thor? Krishna? Vishnu? Ra?...' If They Say 'just God. I Only Believe In The One God,' I'll Point Out That They Are Nearly As Atheistic As Me. I Don't Believe In 2,870 Gods, And They Don't Believe In 2,869.

The Next Time Someone Is Critical Of You, Just Take A Moment To Consider Their Life. Then Smile To Yourself.

I'm Not A Person That's Easily Embarrassed, But I'm Embarrassed For Other People.

You Can Just Keep Getting It Worse Until You Have To Pull Back And Let The Audience Breathe. But Yeah, I Really Love Digging.

Saying Atheism Is A Belief System Is Like Saying Not Going Skiing Is A Hobby.

People Have Let Me Down In The Past. I've Loved Something, And It's Become A Disgrace. I'd Rather Start Again.

I Think The Social Faux Par Is Probably What Most People Fear... More People Fear Public Speaking Than Death And That's Because We Don't Want To Make A Fool Of Ourselves. It's Fundamental.

Growing Up, The Two Things That Made My Blood Boil Were Religious Intolerance And Animal Cruelty. I’ve Never Understood It. I Can’t Stand To Have An Animal In Pain.

Never Fear The Truth. No Bad Can Come Of Discussing A True Subject. No Bad At All.

I've Got Three Friends That You'd Call Famous, But I'm Sure After 20 Years, Most Of My Friends Will Be Famous Or Work In Television, Because That's The Nature Of What Your Work Is. When I Was Working In An Office, Most Of My Friends Worked In Offices.

It’s A Strange Myth That Atheists Have Nothing To Live For. It’s The Opposite. We Have Nothing To Die For. We Have Everything To Live For.

It's The Team That Matters. Where Would The Beatles Be Without Ringo. If John Got Yoko To Play Drums The History Of Music Would Be Completely Different.

Just Looking At All The Faces Here Reminds Me Of Some Of The Great Work That Was Done This Year . . . By Cosmetic Surgeons.

I've Never Done Anything For The Common Consensus. I Do Things To Please Me. If You Are Happy With Something Yourself, You Become Bulletproof.

The Best Advice I've Ever Received Is, 'no One Else Knows What They're Doing Either.

My Ideal Meal Would Probably Be The Cheesiest Pasta Or Pizza, Followed By Something Creamy And Chocolaty. I Mean, Just The Worst Things, Really.

Whether You Understand They Evolved Over Billions Of Years Or Believe That A God Made Them All One Afternoon, Please Be Kind To Animals.

Opinions Don't Affect Facts. But Facts Should Affect Opinions, And Do, If You're Rational

If All The Atheists & Agnostics Left America, They'd Lose 93% Of The National Academy Of Sciences & Less Than 1% Of The Prison Population.

Prison Population

There Are Good And Bad Critics Like Good Or Bad Artists. A Good Critic Says Why They Didn't Like It. A Bad Critic Gives It Away That They Don't Like You As A Person. I Quite Like That As Well, Because It Means That I've Won.

Your God Is The Best God. In Fact, He's The Only God. All Other Gods Are Ridiculous, Made Up Rubbish. Not Yours Though. Yours Is Real.

Same-sex Marriage Is Not A Gay Privilege, It's Equal Rights.

For Any Of You Who Don't Know, The Golden Globes Are Just Like The Oscars, But Without All That Esteem. The Golden Globes Are To The Oscars What Kim Kardashian Is To Kate Middleton. A Bit Louder, A Bit Trashier, A Bit Drunker, And More Easily Bought.

I've Never Been Insulted By Hateful Satanists For Not Believing In Their Devil. Only By Loving Christians For Not Believing In Their God.

I've Been Nominated Four Times, Never Won. And The Whole World Is Going, `why Hasn't Winslet Won One?' That's Why I'm Doing It. "schindler's Bloody List," "the Pianist," Oscars Coming Out Of Their Ass.

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James St. James

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