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If You Really Want A Woman To Love You, Then You Have To Dance. And If You Don’t Want To Dance, Then You’re Going To Have To Work Extra Hard To Make A Woman Love You Forever, And You Will Always Run The Risk That She Will Leave You At Any Second For A Man Who Knows How To Tango.

-Sherman Alexie

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If You Really Want

Sherman Alexie

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If You Really Want A Woman To Love You, Then You Have To Dance. And If You Don’t Want To Dance, Then You’re Going To Have To Work Extra Hard To Make A Woman Love You Forever, And You Will Always Run The Risk That She Will Leave You At Any Second For A Man Who Knows How To Tango.

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She Braided My Sister's Hair With Hands That Smelled Deep Roots Buried In The Earth She Told Me The Old Stories How Time Never Mattered When She Died They Gave Me Her Clock

I Think The World Is A Series Of Broken Dams And Floods, And My Cartoons Are Tiny Little Lifeboats.

I'll Quit Eating Meat When You Get A Cow Out Here To Beat Me At A Poetry Slam. Only So Many Words Rhyme With 'mooo.' I Mean, Yes, We're Supposed To Be Better Stewards; Yes, We're Supposed To Take Care Of The Earth; Yes, We're Supposed To Honor The Sacrifices Made By The Animals; Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes, But Dammit, We're In Charge, And You Know Why? It's Because Of These [holding Out Thumbs]...maybe You Think That Carrots Are Less Important Than Cows. I Think They're Equal, Especially In A Sauce.

You Know, People Speak In Poetry All The Time. They Just Don't Realize It.

Religious Fundamentalists Are Unaware That Freedom Of Religion Necessarily Brings With It The Freedom To Mock Religion.

Freedom Of Religion

If You Teach Kids How To Tell Stories, They Have A Better Chance At Everything.

If I Wasn't Writing Poems I'd Be Washing My Hands All The Time.

It Was So Quiet, A Reservation Kind Of Quiet, Where You Can Hear Somebody Drinking Whiskey On The Rocks Three Miles Away.

I Recognize Now That The Conditions That Indians Are Living In Are The Conditions That Poor People Everywhere Are Living In.

The Streetlight Outside My House Shines On Tonight And I'm Watching It Like It Could Give Me A Vision. James Ain't Talked Ever And He Looks At That Streetlight Like It Was A Word And Maybe Like It Was A Verb. James Wanted To Streetlight Me And Make Me Bright And Beautiful So All The Moths And Bats Would Circle Me Like I Was The Center Of The World An Held Secrets.

I Think I Was Born With A Suitcase.

Since Jesus Was Human Then He Most Assuredly Farted And Burped. And If God Did Create Us In God's Image Then God Must Fart And Burp As Well.

When You Resort To Violence To Prove A Point, You’ve Just Experienced A Profound Failure Of Imagination.

Sixty Percent Of All Indians Live In Urban Areas, But Nobody's Writing About Them. They're Really An Underrepresented Population, And The Ironic Thing Is Very, Very Few Of Those We Call Native American Writers Actually Grew Up On Reservations, And Yet Most Of Their Work Is About Reservations.

Native American

Gordie, The White Boy Genius, Gave Me This Book By A Russian Dude Named Tolstoy, Who Wrote, 'happy Families Are All Alike; Every Unhappy Family Is Unhappy In Its Own Way.' Well, I Hate To Argue With A Russian Genius, But Tolstoy Didn't Know Indians, And He Didn't Know That All Indian Families Are Unhappy For The Same Exact Reasons: The Frikkin' Booze.

There Have Been Players With Indian Heritage, But There Hasn't Been A Native-american Professional Basketball Player Who Became A Regular For All Sorts Of Social And Political Reasons.

Native American

Read. Read 1000 Pages For Every 1 Page That You Write.

I Realized That I Might Be A Lonely Indian Boy, But I Was Not Alone In The Loneliness. There Were Millions Of Other Americans Who Had Left Their Birthplaces In Search Of A Dream. (217)

In A Sense, You're Always Mythologizing Your Life; It's Always An Effort To Make Yourself Epic. At Least In Fiction You Can Lie And Sort Of Justify Your Delusion About Your "epicness." But When You're Writing A Memoir, You're Trying To Make Your Life Epic And It's Not - Nobody's Life Is.

The Problem For Me With Liberals Is That We've Abdicated Our Moral Responsibility To The Universe.

I Write In Blood Because I Remember What It Felt Like To Bleed.

Indians Have No Monopoly On Environmentalism. That's One Of The Great Myths. But We Were Subsistence Livers. They're Two Different Things. Environmentalism Is A Conscious Choice And Subsistence Is The Absence Of Choice. We Had To Use Everything To Survive. And Now That We've Been Assimilated And Colonized And We Have Luxuries And Excesses, We're Just As Wasteful As Other People.

I'm A Method Writer. In Order To Write About The Emotion, I Have To Experience It. I Get Physically Tired And Exhausted, Devoting Hours And Hours And Hours To It.

When You're Depressed, You Know, It's Like The World Has Ended. Even Getting Out Of Bed Takes The Most Massive Amount Of Effort. But When You're Manic, Oh, It's So Addicting. You Know, I Have Finished Novels In Two Weeks In Manic Stages.

These Are Things You Should Learn. Your Past Is A Skeleton Walking One Step Behind You; Your Future Is A Skeleton Walking One Step In Front Of You. Maybe You Don’t Wear A Watch, But Your Skeletons Do, And They Always Know What Time It Is. Now, These Skeletons Are Made Of Memories, Dreams, And Voices. And They Can Trap You In The In-between, Between Touching And Becoming. But They’re Not Necessarily Evil, Unless You Let Them Be.

I Am Extremely Conscious Of My Tribalism. And When You Talk About Tribalism, You Talk About Living In A Black And White World. I Mean, Native American Tribalism Sovereignty, Even The Political Fight For Sovereignty And Cultural Sovereignty Is A Very Us Versus Them. And I Think A Lot Of People In This Country, Especially European Americans And Those Descended From Europeans Don't See Themselves As Tribal.

Native American

Also Because I'm Ambiguously Ethnic Looking, You Know, I Come To New York And I Can Be Anything. People Generally Think I'm Half Of Whatever They Are.

Like Any Good Shaman, Professional Baseball Player, Or Politician, My Mother Always Answered Questions With Questions.

My Name Is Sherman J. Alexie Jr., And I Am An Insomniac.

Ialways Think It's Funny When Indians Celebrate Thanksgiving. I Mean, Sure, The Indians And Pilgrims Were Best Friends During The First Thanksgiving, But A Few Years Later, The Pilgrims Were Shooting Indians. So I'm Never Quite Sure Why We Eat Turkey Like Everybody Else. (101)

Humor Was An Antiseptic That Cleaned The Deepest Of Personal Wounds.

...and Nostalgia Is A Cancer. Nostalgia Will Fill Your Heart Up With Tumors. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, That's What You Are. You're Just An Old Fart Dying Of Terminal Nostalgia.

I Grew Up In A Storytelling Culture, A Tribal Culture, But Also In An American Storytelling Culture.

Writing Is A Lonely Business.

Funny How A Little Politeness Can Change People's Minds.

She Told Me That Every Other Step Was Just For Me.' But That's Only Half Of The Dance,' I Said. Yeah,' My Father Said. 'she Was Keeping The Rest For Herself. Nobody Can Give Everything Away. It Ain't Healthy.

I'm A Poet Who Can Whine In Meter

How Self-centered, How Arrogant... Imagine The Awesome Privilege Of Living In A Society Where You Get To Choose What You Eat At Each And Every Meal. When I Was A Kid, I Was A Vegetarian And A Vegan For Long Stretches... I Was A Commodity Cheese-atarian.

I Had The Feeling I Was Going To Be Successful, And I Didn't Want To Be Another Disappointing Indian.

The Poetry, If You Will, Of Life Is Reduced To This Sort Of Dry, Scientific, You Know, It's The Worst Sort Of Précis Of Who We Are.

Only In Rock Music And The Literary World You See So Many Ugly White Guys With Beautiful Women. That Says A Lot About The Women, Their Character. They're Attracted To More Than Surface.

And Then I Realized That My Sister Was Trying To Live A Romance Novel. Man, That Takes Courage And Imagination. Well, It Also Took Some Degree Of Mental Illness, Too, But I Was Suddenly Happy For Her. And A Little Scared. Well, A Lot Scared.

I'm Quite Aware Of My Differences. I Wouldn't Classify Them As Weird

In Order To Know Somebody Through Their Words, I Mean, It Has To Be An, It Has To Be A Letter, You Know? It Has To Be A Long E-mail. It Has To Be A Five-page Hand-written Letter, You Know, It Has To Be Overwhelming And Messy And Sloppy As Humans Are.

The World, Even The Smallest Parts Of It, Is Filled With Things You Don't Know.

I Thought I’d Been Condescended To As An Indian - That Was Nothing Compared To The Condescension For Writing Y.a.

I Think Most Native American Literature Is Unreadable By The Vast Majority Of Native Americans. Generally Speaking Indians Don't Read Books. It's Not A Book Culture. That's Why I'm Trying To Make Movies. Indians Go To Movies; Indians Own Video Recorders.

Native American

We Are Taught To Take The Bread Into Our Bodies As Proof Of Jesus's Body.

Corliss Wondered What Happens To A Book That Sits Unread On A Library Shelf For Thirty Years. Can A Book Rightfully Be Called A Book If It Never Gets Read? If A Tree Falls In A Forest And Gets Pulped To Make Paper For A Book That Never Gets Read, But There's Nobody There To Read It, Does It Make A Sound?

We Only Know How To Lose And Be Lost.

The Cello Looks Like A Woman To Me. And, You Know, The Curves. And So I Am In A Way, And It's Funny To Admit This, I Am Sexually Attracted To The Cello, The Curves Really Get Me. So As I Watched Him Play, You Know, Yo Yo Ma Is Sort Of Making Love To A Beautiful Woman.

When A Glass Sits On A Table Here, People Don't Wonder If It's Half Filled Or Half Empty. They Just Hope It's Good Beer.

Drinking Would Shut Down My Seeing And My Hearing And My Feeling," She Used To Say. "why Would I Want To Be In The World If I Couldn't Touch The World With All Of My Senses Intact?

I Don't Know What Any Individual Should Do About Crossing Her Own Borders. I Only Know That I Live A Happier, More Adventurous Life, By Crossing Borders.

Adventurous Life

One Play Can Change Your Momentum Forever.

But We Danced, Under Wigs And Between Unfinished Walls, Through Broken Promises And Around Empty Cupboards.

Somebody Dies And People Eat Your Food. Funny How That Works.

I've Come To The Point In My Life Where I Encourage Young Native Americans To Become Much More Selfish About Their Personal Needs And Wants.

Native American

In The Middle Of A Crazy And Drunk Life, You Have To Hang Onto The Good And Sober Moments Tightly.

We Can All Learn From Every Text. Reading The Work That Disgusts You Can Only Strengthen Your Core Beliefs. I Could Teach A Semester-long Course Based Only On Reading The Local Telephone Book. All Stories Can Be Taught In Valuable Ways.

Your Past Is A Skeleton Walking One Step Behind You, And Your Future Is A A Skeleton Walking One Step In Front Of You. Maybe You Don't Wear A Watch, But Your Skeletons Do, And They Always Know What Time It Is.

I Don't Think The Revisionist Historians Are Accurate. I Think Their Agendas Are Clouded By Selfishness And Anger And Rage.

Is Revenge A Circle Inside Of A Circle Inside Of A Circle?

Nervous Means You Want To Play. Scared Means You Don't Want To Play.

We All Have To Find Our Own Ways To Say Good-bye.

I Guess A Witness Is All I Am. I Think As A Writer, You're Pretty Removed. Writing Is A Very Selfish, Individualistic Pursuit. So In That Sense I'm A Witness Because I'm Not Participating.

In High School I Dated A White Woman. She Would Come To Visit Me On The Rez. And Her Dad, Who Was Very Racist, Didn't Like That At All. And He Told Her One Time, 'you Shouldn't Go On The Rez If You're White Because Indians Have A Lot Of Anger In Their Heart.'

You Have To Love Somebody That Much To Also Hate Them That Much, Too. (191)

Do You Understand How Amazing It Is To Hear That From An Adult? Do You Know How Amazing It Is To Hear That From Anybody? It's One Of The Simplest Sentences In The World, Just Four Words, But They're The Four Hugest Words In The World When They're Put Together. You Can Do It.

That's Right, I Am A Book Kisser.

When I Had No Money, And A Great Book Came Out, I Couldn't Get It. I Had To Wait. I Love The Idea That I Have Hardcover Books Here And At Home That I Haven't Read Yet. That's How I View That I'm Rich. I Have Hardcover Books I May Never Read.

Certainly I'm Angry At The Way Indians Have Been Treated And Continue To Be Treated. But I Don't Think It's A Helpless Emotion.

We're All Travelling Heavy With Illusions.

He Wanted The Songs, The Stories, To Save Everybody.

He Looked Into The Crowd For Approval, Saw His Mother And Father. He Waved And They Waved Back. Smiles And Indian Teeth. They Were Both Drunk. Everything Familiar And Welcome. Everything Beautiful.

I Was Studying The Sky Like I Was An Astronomer, Except It Was Daytime And I Didn't Have A Telescope, So I Was Just An Idiot.

I Love To Scare The Already Terrified Assholes.

If You're Good At It, And You Love It, And It Helps You Navigate The River Of The World, Then It Can't Be Wrong.

It Sucks To Be Poor, And It Sucks To Feel That You Somehow Deserve To Be Poor. You Start Believing That You're Poor Because You're Stupid And Ugly. And Then You Start Believing That You're Stupid And Ugly Because You're Indian. And Because You're Indian You Start Believing You're Destined To Be Poor. It's An Ugly Circle And There's Nothing You Can Do About It.

My Only Purpose Is To Teach Children To Rebel Against Authority Figures.

Last September 16th, I Was Walking In Downtown Seattle When This Pick-up Truck Pulls Up In Front Of Me. Guy Leans Out The Window And Yells, "go Back To Your Own Country," And I Was Laughing So Hard Because It Wasn't So Much A Hate Crime As A Crime Of Irony.

And Believe Me, A Good Piece Of Chicken Can Make Anybody Believe In The Existence Of God.

Unlike Landed White Men, She Didn't Need To Climb Mountains To Experience Mystic Panic. All She Needed Was To Set Her Alarm Dock For The Next Morning, Wake When It Rang, And Go To Class.

You Can't Sustain [anger]. You Become Bitter. Nothing's Going To Change. Anger Leads To Resentment, Then To Spiking Your Orange Juice, Then To Martyrdom.

If It's Fiction, Then It Better Be True.

I Felt So Conflicted About Having Fled The Rez As A Kid That I Created A Whole Literary Career That Left Me There.

Yep, My Daddy Was An Undependable Drunk. But He'd Never Missed Any Of My Organized Games, Concerts, Plays, Or Picnics. He May Not Have Loved Me Perfectly, But He Loved Me As Well As He Could. (189)

Poverty Doesn’t Give You Strength Or Teach You Lessons About Perseverance. No, Poverty Only Teaches You How To Be Poor.

All I Try To Do Is Portray Indians As We Are, In Creative Ways. With Imagination And Poetry. I Think A Lot Of Native American Literature Is Stuck In One Idea: Sort Of Spiritual, Environmentalist Indians. And I Want To Portray Everyday Lives. I Think By Doing That, By Portraying The Ordinary Lives Of Indians, Perhaps People Learn Something New.

Native American

The Form I Most Enjoy Writing Is The Sonnet Or Sonnet-like Forms, Where You Have A - You Know, Three Stanzas Or Two Stanzas That Lead Into A Concluding Couplet.

If You Care About Something Enough, It’s Going To Make You Cry. But You Have To Use It. Use Your Tears. Use Your Pain. Use Your Fear. Get Mad. Arnold, Get Mad.

But Something Magical Happened To Me When I Went To Reardan. Overnight I Became A Good Player. I Suppose It Had Something To Do With Confidence. I Mean, I'd Always Been The Lowest Indian On The Reservation Totem Pole - I Wasn't Expected To Be Good So I Wasn't. But In Reardan, My Coach And The Other Players Wanted Me To Be Good. They Needed Me To Be Good. They Expected Me To Be Good. And So I Became Good. I Wanted To Live Up To The Expectations. I Guess That's What It Comes Down To. The Power Of Expectations. And As They Expected More Of Me, I Expected More Of Myself, And It Just Grew And Grew.

Spiritual Matters Should Be Private.

I Ain't Interested In The Truth. I'm Interested In The Way Things Should Be.

I Write Less About Alcohol, Less And Less And Less. You 're An Addict - So Of Course You Write About The Thing You Love Most. I Loved Alcohol The Most, Loved It More Than Anybody Or Anything. That's What I Wrote About. And It Certainly Accounted For Some Great Writing. But It Accounted For Two Or Three Years Of Good Writing - It Would Never Account For 20 Years Of Good Writing. I Would Have Turned Into Charles Bukowski. He Wrote 10,000 Poems And 10 Of Them Were Great.

He Loved Her, Of Course, But Better Than That, He Chose Her, Day After Day. Choice: That Was The Thing.

"i Used To Think The World Was Broken Down By Tribes," I Said. "by Black And White. By Indian And White. But I Know That Isn't True. The World Is Only Broken Into Two Tribes: The People Who Are Assholes And The People Who Are Not."

Black And White

They Put Me In A Holding Cell With A Black Kid And A White Kid And A Chinese Kid. We're The United Nations Of Juvenile Delinquents.

I Feel Like A Carton Of Eggs Holding Up An Elephant.

The People Who Loved Me When I Was Seven Years Old Love My Books, And The People Who Didn't Like Me When I Was Seven Years Old Don't Like My Books.

I Believe In Any Kid's Ability To Read Any Book And Form Their Own Judgements. It's The Job Of A Parent To Guide His/her Child Through The Reading Of Every Book Imaginable. Censorship Of Any Form Punishes Curiosity.

I Write Books For Teenagers Because I Vividly Remember What It Felt Like To Be A Teen Facing Everyday And Epic Dangers. I Don't Write To Protect Them. It's Far Too Late For That. I Write To Give Them Weapons-in The Form Of Words And Ideas-that Will Help Them Fight Their Monsters. I Write In Blood Because I Remember What It Felt Like To Bleed.

If One Reads Enough Books One Has A Fighting Chance. Or Better, One's Chances Of Survival Increase With Each Book One Reads.

All Art Is Exploitation.

The Problem Is That Too Many Adults Think Their Kids' Lives Are Simple, Or They Try To Make Their Lives Simple, When Their Emotional Lives Are Just As Complicated As Ours. They Might Have A Few Less Tools To Deal With It Because They're Young, But The Emotions Are All The Same, And The Subject Matter Is All The Same.

Seems Like The Cold Would Never Go Away And Winter Would Be Like The Bottom Of My Feet But Then It Is Gone In One Night And In Its Place Comes The Sun So Large And Laughable.

And None Of These People, Not One Of Them, Had Loved Any Of The Others Well Enough. Failures, He Thought, We're All Failures... He Wanted His Love To Be The Wine And Bread, And The Blood And Flesh. He Reached For Her, A Dangerous Stranger In A City Of Dangerous Strangers, But She Turned Away From Him And Walked Unsteadily Through The Crowd. How Many Loveless People Walk Among The Barely Loved?

That's The Whole Point Of Life, You Know? To Meet New People.

Meeting New People

I Grabbed My Book And Opened It Up. I Wanted To Smell It. Heck, I Wanted To Kiss It. Yes, Kiss It. That's Right, I Am A Book Kisser. Maybe That's Kind Of Perverted Or Maybe It's Just Romantic And Highly Intelligent.

Most Of My Heroes Are Just Decent People. Decency Is Rare And Underrated.

Nobody Recognizes That A Bookstore Or Library Can Also Be A Drowning Polar Bear. And In This Country [us], Magazines, Newspapers, And Bookstores Are Drowning Polar Bears. And If People Can't See That Or Don't Want To Talk About It, I Don't Understand Them At All.

What If Someone Picks On Me?" I Asked Then I'll Pick On Them". What If Someone Picks My Nose?" I Asked. The I'll Pick Your Nose, Too" Rowdy Said.

My Father Was A Basketball Player, So I Loved Basketball Because He Did. It Was A Direct Transference. But, More Than That, Basketball, In The United States At Least, Plays The Same Function That Soccer Does Everyone Else In The World. It's The Sport Of Poverty. It's The Sport Born Of Poverty. It's The Cheapest Sport.

Like Officer Dave.he's Never Said Much About His Life, But I Can Tell He's Scarred. And He Knows I'm Scarred Too. The Wounded Always Recognize The Wounded. We Can Smell Each Other.

I End Up Feeling Like A Spy In The House Of Ethnicity, You Know? Because People Will Talk Around Me As They Would Talk Around The People In Their Cultural Group. So I Get To Hear All The Secrets And Jokes And You Know, I'm A Part Of Every Community Because Of The Way I Look.

That's How I Do This Life Sometimes By Making The Ordinary Just Like Magic And Just Like A Card Trick And Just Like A Mirror And Just Like Disappearing. Every Indian Learns How To Be A Magician And Learns How To Misdirect Attention And The Dark Hand Is Always Quicker Than The White Eye And No Matter How Close You Get To My Heart You Will Never Find Out My Secrets And I'll Never Tell You And I'll Never Show You The Same Trick Twice. I'm Traveling Heavy With Illusions.

White Americans Have A Short Memory.

If One Reads Enough Books, One Has A Fighting Chance.

Yes, I Am Irish And Indian, Which Would Be The Coolest Blend In The World If My Parents Were Around To Teach Me How To Be Irish And Indian. But They're Not Here And Haven't Been For Years, So I'm Not Really Irish Or Indian. I Am A Blank Sky, A Human Solar Eclipse.

I Don’t Want Long Hair, I Don’t Want Short Hair, I Don’t Want Hair At All, And I Don’t Want To Be A Girl Or A Boy. I Want To Be A Yellow And Orange Leaf Some Little Kid Picks Up And Pastes In His Scrapbook.

I Remember When People Used To Think I Was Smart. I Remember When People Used To Think My Brain Was Useful. Damaged By Water, Sure. And Ready To Seizure At Any Moment. But Still Useful, And Maybe Even A Little Bit Beautiful And Sacred And Magical.

A Really Good Stand-up Comic Is A Poet; It's About The Use Of Language. It Can Be Really Poetic. And I Like Politically Conscious Comedy.

Environmentalism Is A Luxury. Just Like Being A Vegetarian Is A Luxury. When You Have To Worry About Eating - You're Not Going To Be Worried About Where The Food's Coming From, Or Who Made Your Shoes. Poverty, Whether Planned Or Not Planned, Is A Way Of Making Environmentalism Moot.

I Think A Lot Of Indians Want Indian Artists To Be Cultural Cheerleaders Rather Than Cultural Investigators.

I Was A Controversial Figure On My Reservation When I Was A Kid. I Was Mouthy And Opinionated And Arrogant. Nothing Has Changed.

I Know A Lot About Being White - Because I Have To, I Live In The White World. A White Person Doesn't Live In The Indian World. I Have To Be White Every Day.

Is God A Man Or A Woman? God Could Be An Armadillo. I Have No Idea.

Do You Know Why The Indian Rain Dances Always Worked? Because The Indians Would Keep Dancing Until It Rained.

Okay, So Maybe I'm Romantic... But Somebody Is Supposed To Be Romantic. Some Warrior Is Supposed To Go To War Against The Imperial Forces Of Cynicism And Irony. I Am A Sentimental Soldier.

What Inspires A Poem For Me Is Usually A Moment.

If A Parent Doesn't Want His/her Child To Read A Book Then There Is Always An Alternative Text To Read. But The Book Banners Want To Control What Every Child Reads.

[f]rank Knew He Was Guilty Of Arrogance And Misanthropy, But He Compensated By Being Kind To Strangers And Tipping Really Well At Restaurants.

Imagination Is The Politics Of Dreams; Imagination Turns Every Word Into A Bottle Rocket. . . . Imagine Every Day Is Independence Day And Save Us From Traveling The River Changed; Save Us From Hitchhiking The Long Road Home. Imagine An Escape. Imagine That Your Own Shadow On The Wall Is A Perfect Door. Imagine A Song Stronger Than Penicillin. Imagine A Spring With Water That Mends Broken Bones. Imagine A Drum Which Wraps Itself Around Your Heart. Imagine A Story That Puts Wood In The Fireplace.

Books And Beer Are The Best And Worst Defense.

I Look More Indian When I'm Serious.

My Career Means, If You're A Non-indian Writing About Indians, At Least There's One Indian In Your Rearview Mirror.

A Lot Of People Have No Idea That Right Now Y.a. (young Adult). Is The Garden Of Eden Of Literature.

Every Movie Is A Road Movie. Every Novel Is A Mystery. Every Tortilla Chip Is Sacred.

Let Us Now Celebrate The Literary Allusion.

If You Really Want A Woman To Love You, Then You Have To Dance. And If You Don’t Want To Dance, Then You’re Going To Have To Work Extra Hard To Make A Woman Love You Forever, And You Will Always Run The Risk That She Will Leave You At Any Second For A Man Who Knows How To Tango.

When Are We Left-wingers Going To Learn That We Are Losing The Cultural And Political Battle With Conservatives Because We Are Fractured Into Narcissistic Special-interest Groups? Why Should An Antiwar Protestor Be So Concerned About Her Dietary Identity? The Political Opinions Of Vegetarians And Meat-eaters Are, After All, Equally Important. And What Does It Tell Us About Vegetarians That It Would Never Occur To Meat-eaters To Carry A Sign That Reads "pacifist Pork Chop Lover For Peace" Or "backyard Rib Barbecuer For International Nuclear Disarmament"?

Political Opinions

Nuclear Disarmament

There Isn't A Lot Of Poverty Literature In The Young-adult World. And I Don't Know Why That Is, But I Think Certainly I Felt A Gap.

I Used To Sleep With My Books In Piles All Over My Bed And Sometimes They Were The Only Thing Keeping Me Warm And Always The Only Thing Keeping Me Alive. Books Are The Best And Worst Defense.

In A Real-world Way, My Gifts Are Very Limited In Terms Of What I Can Do.

Poetry = Anger X Imagination

I Learned How To Stop Crying. I Learned How To Hide Inside Of Myself. I Learned How To Be Somebody Else. I Learned How To Be Cold And Numb.

There Are All Kinds Of Addicts, I Guess. We All Have Pain. And We All Look For Ways To Make The Pain Go Away. (107)

I Don't Have To Participate In Another Culture's Ceremonies In Order To Respect That Culture.

It's A Weird Thing. Reservations Were Meant To Be Prisons, You Know? Indians Were Supposed To Move Onto Reservations And Die. We Were Supposed To Disappear. But Somehow Or Another, Indians Have Forgotten The Reservations Were Meant To Be Death Camps.

Were Meant To Be

Listen You Have To Read A Book Three Times Before You Know It.

I Draw Because Words Are Too Unpredictable. I Draw Because Words Are Too Limited. If You Speak And Write In English, Or Spanish, Or Chinese, Or Any Other Language, Then Only A Certain Percentage Of Human Beings Will Get Your Meaning. But When You Draw A Picture Everybody Can Understand It. If I Draw A Cartoon Of A Flower, Then Every Man, Woman, And Child In The World Can Look At It And Say, "that's A Flower.

She Was In Pain And I Loved Her, Sort Of Loved Her, I Guess, So I Kind Of Had To Love Her Pain, Too.

My Father Was Always Depressed. When He Was Home And Sober, He Was Mostly In His Room.

Can You Hear The Dreams Crackling Like A Campfire? Can You Hear The Dreams Sweeping Through The Pine Trees And Tipis? Can You Hear The Dreams Laughing In The Sawdust? Can You Hear The Dreams Shaking Just A Little Bit As The Day Grows Long? Can You Hear The Dreams Putting On A Good Jacket That Smells Of Fry Bread And Sweet Smoke? Can You Hear The Dreams Stay Up Late And Talk So Many Stories?

It's Not Oil That Runs The World, It's Shame.

At Least Half The Country Thinks The Mascot Issue Is Insignificant. But I Think It's Indicative Of The Ways In Which Indians Have No Cultural Power. We're Still Placed In The Past. So We're Either In The Past Or We're Only Viewed Through Casinos.

I'm Not A Pacifist By Any Measure, But I'm Also Fully Aware That The Reasons I Might Go To War Could Be Very Dubious.

My Father Is An Amazing Man.

Reardan Is The Rich White Farm Town That Sits In The Wheat Fields Exactly 22 Miles Away From The Rez. And It's A Hick Town I Suppose Filled With Farmers And Rednecks And Racists Cops Who Stop Every Indian That Drives Through. During One Week When I Was Little Dad Got Stopped Three Times For Dwi- Driving While Indian.

There's This Whole Notion Of Being An Indian - The Idea That "warrior" Is A Positive Description Of Us [indians As Native Americans]. When An Indian Guy Does Well, He's A Warrior, Even Now. He Could Be A Computer Salesman, But If He Does Well, He's A Warrior. I'm Not A Pacifist By Any Measure, But I'm Also Fully Aware That The Reasons I Might Go To War Could Be Very Dubious.

Native American

When It Comes To Death, We Know That Laughter And Tears Are Pretty Much The Same Thing. And So, Laughing And Crying, We Said Good-bye To My Grandmother. And When We Said Goodbye To One Grandmother, We Said Good-bye To All Of Them. Each Funeral Was A Funeral For All Of Us. We Lived And Died Together. All Of Us Laughed When They Lowered My Grandmother Into The Ground. And All Of Us Laughed When They Covered Her With Dirt. And All Of Us Laughed As We Walked And Drove And Rode Our Way Back To Our Lonely, Lonely Houses.

When You Read A Piece Of Writing That You Admire, Send A Note Of Thanks To The Author.

Life Is A Constant Struggle Between Being An Individual And Being A Member Of The Community.

My Father Was Sleepless Most Of His Life. So By The Age Of Five, I Was Awake With Him All Night Long, Watching Bad Television Or We'd Lie In The Same Bed, And I'd Read My Comic Books While He Read His Latest Spy Or Mystery Novel.

Those Montana Indians Were So Tough That White People Were Scared Of Them. Can You Imagine A Place Where White People Are Scared Of Indians And Not The Other Way Around? That's Montana.

Well, I Think The Worst Part About Tribalism Is Its Tendency To Fundamentalize, And If I Can Fight Fundamentalism In Any Of Its Forms I'm Happy.

When You Construct A Mix Tape, The First Song You Come Out With Has To Be A Barnburner.

It's Way Too Early For Him To Be Talking Anyhow But I See In His Eyes Something And I See In His Eyes A Voice And I See In His Eyes A Whole New Set Of Words

The Dream He Needed Most Was The Dream That Frightened Him More.

We Indians Really Should Be Better Liars, Considering How Often We've Been Lied To.

The Ordinary Can Be Like Medicine.

...there Are Some Children Who Aren't Really Children At All, They're Just Pillars Of Flame That Burn Everything They Touch. And There Are Some Children Who Are Just Pillars Of Ash, That Fall Apart When You Touch Them..." ~ Thomas Builds-the-fire (played By Evan Adams) In Alexie's "smoke Signals

That's One More Thing People Don't Know About Indians: We Love To Talk Dirty.

Estranged From The Tribe That Gives No Protection, What Happens To The Soul That Hates Its Reflection?

Sometimes It's Called Passing Out And Sometimes It's Just Pretending To Be Asleep

What Kind Of Life Can You Have In A House Without Books?

I Hear Poetry Whenever I Turn On The Radio. Eminem Is A Better Poet Than Just About Everybody. He's Better Than Billy Collins; He's Better Than Richard Wilbur; He's Better Than Me.

Bush Has Not Read Enough Books To Have A Developed Moral Sense. The Fewer Books You Read, The Easier It Is To Become Fundamental. In Some Ways My Antiwar Stand Here Is Also A Stand On Anti-literacy. Someone Should Get G.w. Into A Reading Program, Get Him To Join A Book Club. Have Him Read Hamlet, King Lear.

When It Comes To Death, We Know That Laughter And Tears Are Pretty Much The Same Thing.

I Didn't Know What To Say To Her. What Do You Say To People When They Ask How It Feels To Lose Everything? When Every Planet In Your Solar System Has Exploded?

And Then She Asks Me How Many Sexual Partners I've Had And I Say One Or Two Depending On Your Definition Of What I Did To Custer . . .

In The Middle Of The Night, When You're Ambiguously Ethnic, Like Me, When You're Brown, Beige, Mauve, Siena, One Of Those Lighter Browns In The Crayola Box. You Have To Be Careful Of The Cops And Robbers, Because Nobody's Quite Sure What You Are, But Everybody Has Assumptions.

Don't Live Up To Your Stereotypes.

The Percentage Of Indian Kids Doing Some Sort Of Artistic Work Is Much Higher Than In The General Population - Painting, Drawing, Dancing, Singing. The Creation Of Art Is Still An Everyday Part Of Indian Culture, Unlike The Dominant Culture, Where Art Is Sort Of Peripheral.

Because I'm An American, I Know There's All Sorts Of International Folks Who Would Gladly Kidnap And Behead Me.

I Suddenly Understood That If Every Moment Of A Book Should Be Taken Seriously, Then Every Moment Of A Life Should Be Taken Seriously As Well.

Nostalgia Is Always Doomed And Dooming.

Pain Is Never Added To Pain. It Multiplies.

My Wife Was The First Romantic Partner Who Understood Both American And Native Parts Of Me - Not So Much The Positive Stuff, But The Damage.

My Books For Adults Had Been Previously Challenged And Banned So I'd Had Experience With It. I Always Find It Sad And Amusing: Sad To Think That Such Archaic And Potentially Dangerous Censorious Beliefs Still Exist, And Amused Because These Censors Only Make A Book More Powerful And Seductive When Trying To Ban It.

And I Couldn't Make Fun Of Her For That Dream. It Was My Dream, Too. And Indian Boys Weren't Supposed To Dream Like That. And White Girls From Small Towns Weren't Supposed To Dream Big, Either. We Were Supposed To Be Happy With Our Limitations. But There Was No Way Penelope And I Were Going To Sit Still. Nope, We Both Wanted To Fly.

When Anybody, No Matter How Old They Are, Loses A Parent, I Think It Hurts The Same As If You Were Only Five Years Old, You Know? I Think All Of Us Are Always Five Years Old In The Presence And Absence Of Our Parents.

Every Indian Kid Has Access To Myspace And Facebook. But That Doesn't Mean They Have Access To Books And Great Teachers. This Idea About Bringing Digital Tech Into Schools Is Great, But Once Again I'll Say That This Is Not How People Actually Learn.

If You Let People Into Your Life A Little Bit, They Can Be Pretty Damn Amazing.

I Got Hundreds Of Emails Insulting Me, Accusing Me Of Being Some Caveman. I Am By No Means A Luddite. I Have Two Ipods. I Have A Cell Phone. I Have Cable Tv, Hdtv!

Everybody Likes To Have A Place To Think, To Meditate, To Eat A Burrito.

A Lot Of Native Culture Has Been Destroyed. So You Already Feel Lost Inside Your Culture. And Then You Add Up Feeling Lost And Insignificant Inside The Larger Culture. So You End Up Feeling Lost Squared. And To Never Be Recognized, To Never Have Any Power, You Know, Other Minority Communities Actually Have A Lot Of Economic, Cultural Power.

Corliss Had Never Once Considered The Fate Of Library Books. She'd Never Wondered How Many Books Go Unread. She Loved Books. How Could She Not Worry About The Unread? She Felt Like A Disorganized Scholar, An Inconsiderate Lover, An Abusive Mother, And A Cowardly Soldier.

Well, As A Native, As A Colonized People You Do Live In The In Between. The Thing Is I'm Native. But Necessarily Because I'm A Member Of The Country, I'm Also A White American.

...it's Like This White-indian Thing Has Gotten Out Of Control. And The Thing With The Blacks And The Mexicans. Everybody Blaming Everybody...i Don't Know What Happened. I Can't Explain It All. Just Look Around At The World. Look At This Country. Things Just Aren't Like They Used To Be.' 'son, Things Have Never Been Like What You Think They Used To Be.

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