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If A Woman Isn't Being Hazed, She's Not Being Tested; Therefore, She Is Not Being Trusted.

-Warren Farrell

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If A Woman Isn't

Warren Farrell

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If A Woman Isn't Being Hazed, She's Not Being Tested; Therefore, She Is Not Being Trusted.

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The Male Corporate Model Is Built On A Mans Greater Willingness To Be A Slave Of Sorts - Especially Once He Has To Provide For Children.

In Our Society, The Sound Of Men Complaining Is Like Nails On A Chalkboard.

Men’s Greatest Weakness Is Their Facade Of Strength, And Women’s Greatest Strength Is Their Facade Of Weakness.

Boys With A Failure To Launch Are Invisible To Most Girls. With Poor Social Skills, The Boys Feel Anger At Their Fear Of Being Rejected And Self-loathing At Their Inability To Compete.

Men Are Socialized To Trust Women Until Evidence To The Contrary Surfaces; Women Are Socialized To Be Suspicious Of Men Until An Individual Man Earns Trust.

Men Are Not Only Women's Unpaid Bodyguards, They Actually Pay To Be A Woman's Bodyguard.

Both Parents' Rights Must Be In Balance So Children Can Grow Up With A Balance Between Both Parents.

Women's Liberation And The Male Midlife Crisis Were The Same Search--for Personal Fulfillment, Common Values, Mutual Respect, Love. But While Women's Liberation Was Thought Of As Promoting Identity, The Male Midlife Crisis Was Thought Of As An Identity Crisis.

For The First Time In Human History The Psychology That Is A Prerequisite For Intimacy Has Become The Psychology That Is A Prerequisite For Species Survival.

Women Attempt Suicide More Often Because They Want To Become The Priority Of Those They Love Rather Than Always Prioritizing Them.

Women-in-jeopardy Movies Are, In Essence, The Updated Versions Of Men Dying To Save The Princess From The Dragon To Earn Her Love. They Are Modern-day Training Films For Teaching Women To Select The Best Protectors While Weeding Out The Rest.

In The Past Quarter Century, We Exposed Biases Against Other Races And Called It Racism, And We Exposed Biases Against Women And Called It Sexism. Biases Against Men We Call Humor.

Letting Men Die Is A Money-saving Device. Safety Costs Money As One Safety Official Put It, 'when Everything Is Hurry, Hurry, Hurry, When You Start Pressuring People And Taking Shortcuts, Things Can Go Wrong. And Then People Die.' No. And Then Men Die.

Solutions: Seek An Understanding Of The Other Sex's Best Intent.

There Are 25 Differences In The Way Women And Men Behave In The Workplace. These 25 Differences Lead To Men Receiving Higher Pay And Women Having Better Lives Or At Least More Balanced Lives.

The Female Western Is The Battle Between The Good And Evil Methods Of Getting The Men Who Perform Best.

When A Government Requires A Man To Support A Child He Was Tricked Into Creating, That Government Subsidizes Fraud. No. It Is Worse Than That: It Subsidizes The Woman Using A Man's Body For 18-21 Years Without His Consent.

If Women Really Earned Fifty-nine Cents To The Dollar For The Same Work As Men, What Business Could Compete Effectively By Hiring Men At Any Level?

Companies Like I.b.m. Have Offered Women Scholarships To Study Engineering For Years, And Women Engineers Routinely Get Higher Starting Salaries Than Men.

A Man's Primary Fantasy Is Access To A Variety Of Attractive Women Without The Fear Of Rejection.

I Don't Think There's Anything That Is A Greater Area Of Discrimination Against Women Today Than The Fact That Nowhere In The World Is There A Female Role Model In Team Sports That More Than Half Of A General Audience Would Recognize

Men Give The Same Lines To Different Women For The Same Reason Women Wear The Same Perfume For Different Men; We All Try The Things That Work.

The Deeper Purpose Of A More Positive Attitude Toward Men Is A Better Life For The Children Who Are Parented By The Men Who Are Their Dads And Stepdads; Less Shame For Our Sons Who Will Become Men; And, For Our Daughters, A Deeper Understanding Of Men's Desire To Please That Leaves Them Feeling Their Willingness To Please Is Not Unrequited But Returned - Allowing Our Daughters To Feel Less Lonely And More Loved. If We Earn More And Love Less, We Pay For A Home In Which We Do Not Live.

In Brief, Our Genetic Heritage Is At Odds With Our Genetic Future. For The First Time In Human History, The Qualities It Takes To Survive As A Species Are Compatible With The Qualities It Takes To Love.

The Money Men Make From Their Willingness To Work The Least Desirable Hours Is Not A Sign Of Discrimination Against Women, But A Sign Of The Willingness Of Mostly Married Men To Lose Sleep To Support The Family As Their Wife Loses Sleep To Feed The Child. A Willingness To Do The Uncomfortable Shifts Is One Reason Married Men Earn More Than Twice What Never-married Men Earn. Men's Contribution, Made At Night, Need Not Be Lost In The Dark.

Ideally There Should Not Be A Men's Movement But A Gender Transition Movement; Only The Power Of The Women's Movement Necessitates The Temporary Corrective Of A Men's Movement. And This Creates A Special Challenge For Men: There Are Few Political Movements Filled With Healthy People, Yet Few Healthy Changes Have Occurred Without Political Movements.

The Teenage Female Has Less Demand To Perform And More Resources To Attract Love. Her Body And Mind Are More Genetic Gifts.

By The 1970s, The American Woman Was Being Called 'liberated' Or 'superwoman' While The American Man Was Being Called 'baby Killer' If He Fought In Vietnam, 'traitor' If He Protested, Or 'apathetic' If He Did Neither. Even Men Who Came Home Paraplegics Were Literally Spit On.

Laws Are Made With Such Attention To Protecting Women That, If A Man's Constitutional Rights Conflict With A Woman's Protection, His Rights Disintegrate Before Her Protection Disintegrates.

In One Decade, Women Had Gotten More Protection Against Offensive Jokes In The Workplace Than Men Had Gotten In Centuries Against Being Killed In The Workplace.

The Less A Man Is Willing To Give Up A Sex Object, The More He'll Be Trapped Into Becoming A Success Object.

Choosing Safety Is A Choice Of Life Over Career.

You Could Make A Case That Women Addicted Men To Their Sexuality And Then Withdrew Their Sexuality Until We Provided Them With A Source Of Income.

We Have Entered 'the Era Of The Three-option Woman And The No-option Man.'

So While In Men's Magazines Success Is A Power Tool To Get Sex And Love, And Therefore The Look Of Success Is Crucial, In Women's Magazines Love And Sex Are Power Tools To Get Success And Therefore Both The Look Of Love And The Sexual Tease/promise Are Crucial.

To Me, God Is The Accumulated Wisdom I've Gathered Throughout My Life. When I Pay Attention, My Body Gives Me A Printout Of This Wisdom.

When Birth Control Pills Were Available In Europe But Not In The United States, American Women Created An Uproar About How The Unwillingness To Make The Pill Available Showed A Contempt For The Lives Of Women. When The Food And Drug Administration (fda) Released Birth Control Pills With High Dosages Of Hormones That Were Later Found To Be Unnecessarily High, They Were Attacked For Not Caring About Women Enough To Do The Necessary Tests.

When Men Give Lines, Women Learn To Not Trust Men. When Women Wear Makeup, Men Learn To Not Trust Women. Male Lines And Female Makeup Are Divorce Training.

Our Love For Children Is So Immediate In Part Because We Feel Their Powerlessness Immediately; Conversely, Part Of The Way We Deny Our Love For Men Is By Denying Men's Powerlessness. Too Often We Have Confused Love For Men With Respect For Them, Especially For Their Power To Take Care Of Us - Which Is Really Just Love For Ourselves.

He And She Become Selective At Different Points; She Can Be Selective When He Wants His Primary Fantasy - Sex; He Can Be Selective When She Wants Her Primary Fantasy - Commitment.

The Problem Is That Americans Care More About Saving Whales Than Saving Males.

A Lot Of Young Men Are Frustrated And Looking For Someone To Blame.

Men Move Through A Much Different Process Before Commitment Than Women Do.

When Women And Men Have Approximately Equal Life Expectancies, It Seems To Be Because Women Die Not Only In Childbirth (fewer Than Thought) But About Equal From Diseases; Poor Sanitation And Water; Inadequate Healthcare; And Diseases Of Malnutrition. In Industrialized Societies, Early Deaths Are Caused More By Diseases Triggered By Stress, Which Breaks Down The Immune System. It Is Since Stress Has Become The Key Factor That Men Have Died So Much Sooner Than Women.

I Don't Have Children That I've Lost In A Bitter Custody Dispute. But I See An Enormous Wound In Kids Due To A Lack Of Their Dads.

I'm An Awfully Loyal Friend. Once I've Started A Relationship With Someone, It's Like They Are Syrup And I'm A Pancake. Their Syrup Gets Into My Pancake, So To Speak.

Women's Vulnerability Confessing Their Desire To See Men As A Success Object Is Matched By Men's Confession Of Compulsiveness Of Sexual Desire For Women.

Empathy Is At The Core Of Family Stability And Love. I've Never Had A Couple Come To Me And Say, I Want A Divorce; My Partner Understands Me.

Students Coming From Father-present Families Score Higher In Math And Science Even When They Come From Weaker Schools.

Feminists Have Confused Opportunity With Outcome.

Nobody Really Believes In Equality Anyway.

All Societies That Have Survived Based On Their Ability To Prepare Their Sons To Be Disposable, In War And At Work - And Therefore As Dads.

The Rules Of Sexism Do Not Free Men From The Terror Of Violence; They Only Keep Men From Complaining About It.

A Family That Knows How To Play Together Has The Tools To Stay Together.

Men Are Often A Lot Less Vindictive Than Women Are, Because We Are Rejected Constantly Every Day.

We Would Not Think Of Allowing A Man To Determine A Woman's Life Merely Because A Fetus He Helped Create Was In Her Womb; Then Why Would We Allow A Woman To Determine A Man's Life Merely Because A Fetus He Helped Create Is In Her Womb?

Just As Women Needed The Help Of The Law To Enter The Workplace In The 20th Century, Men Will Need The Help Of The Law To Love Their Children In The 21st Century.

In 1969, Nationwide, Female Professors Who Had Never Been Married And Never Published Earned 145% Of Their Counterpart Male Colleagues.

Just As The Depression Left A Generation Of Dads Feeling They Never Had Enough Money, So Father Deprivation Is Leaving A Generation Of Sons And Daughters With Different Psychic Wounds.

It Is Important That A Woman’s “noes” Be Respected And Her “yeses” Be Respected.

I Define Power As Control Over One's Life. Pay Is Not About Power. Pay Is About Giving Up Power To Get The Power Of Pay.

Women's Genetic Celebrity Power Magnifies Men's Protector Instinct. It Inspires The Government-as-substitute-husband. Men's Addiction To The Genetic Celebrity Is Either Invisible Or In The Denial Stage Thus We Either Don't See It, Or When Confronted, Deny It.

Dads In The Family Are Even More Important Than Women In The Workplace. The Workplace Benefits From Women, But The Family Needs Dads.

Until Recently, The Question Was 'why Can't A Woman Be More Like A Man?' It Should Have Been Changed To 'why Can't Both Sexes Be More Like The Best Parts Of Each Other?' Instead, The Pendulum Swung To The 1960s Feminist Lapel Button Adam Was A First Draft. True Enough. So Are We All.

Male Makeup Is Men's Titles, Status And Paying For Dates. Makeup Is What Both Sexes Use To Bridge The Gap Between The Power They Have And The Power They'd Like To Have. Both Male And Female Makeup Are Compensations For Feelings Of Powerlessness.

Divorces Led To Bodies Of Men (called Legislatures) Protecting Women Collectively As Other Men (called Husbands) Failed To Protect Women Individually.

Although Our Grammar Schools Are Teaching A Whole Generation Computer Language To Adjust To The Technological Needs Of A Stage Ii [post Survival-focused] Society, We Have Neglected To Teach This Generation Relationship Language And Conflict Resolution Skills To Address The Social And Psychological Needs Of A Stage Ii Society. And When It Is Taught, In Countries Like Germany, Although Called Social Competence It Focuses On Workplace Teamwork - Still On Survival, Breadwinner Oriented Work Goals.

For Me, The Massiveness Of What I Don't Know Is One Way I Experience God. It Creates In Me A Feeling Of Humility And A Sense Of Gratitude.

Our Choice Of Partners Is One Of The Clearest Statements About Our Choice Of Values.

Since No One Is Always Right, Always Being Right Is Really A Role Model For His Children Feeling Inadequate.

Framework, (...) Addiction To Female Beauty And Sex; Deprivation Of The Beautiful Woman And Sex With Her Until The Man Guarantees Economic Security In Return; (.

When I Lose My Larger Sense Of Supporting People To Be Their Best, I Lessen My Contact With The God Inside Me.

Once Boys' And Men's Challenges Are Clear, The Question 'why Now' Quickly Becomes 'why Didn't We See This Sooner?' The Answer? Virtually Every Society That Survived Did So By Socializing Its Sons To Be Disposable.

When Divorces Meant Marriage No Longer Provided Security For A Lifetime, Women Adjusted By Focusing On Careers As Empowerment. But When The Sacrifice Of A Career Met The Sacrifices In A Career, The Fantasy Of A Career Became The Reality Of Trade-offs. Women Developed Career Ambivalence.

If A Female Employee Is Offended, A Boss Would Like Her To Tell Him, Not Sue Him.

When We Look At The Pay Of Men And Women Who Do Work Equal Hours, Two Discoveries Are Quite Astonishing: --when Women And Men Work Less Than 40 Hours A Week, The Women Earn More Than The Men; --when Men And Women Work More Than 40, The Men Earn More Than The Women.

Were We To Still Be Circumcising The Hood Of The Female Clitoris, We Would Not Have Difficulty Considering This A Continuation Of Our Tradition To Keep Girls Sexually Repressed. America's Reflexive Continuation Of [male] Circumcision-without-research Reflects The Continuation Of Our Tradition To Desensitize Boys To Feelings Of Pain, To Prepare Them To Question The Disposability Of Their Bodies No More Than They Would Question The Disposability Of Their Foreskins.

Women And Men Look At Their Life, And Women Say, What Do I Need? Do I Need More Money, Or Do I Need More Time? And Women Are Intelligent Enough To Say, I Need More Time. And So, Women Lead Balanced Lives; Men Should Be Learning From Women.

Women's Greater Social Desirability And Beauty Power Afford Opportunities For Creating Both Measurable And Invisible Income. While The Opportunities Are Available To Almost All Women And Some Men, They Are Available In Abundance To The Genetic Celebrity ... A Woman So Beautiful That Men Do More Than Look And Talk--they Follow Her.

No Movement Calls [migrant Workers] Oppressed For Providing Money For Women From Whom They Are Receiving Neither Cooking Nor Cleaning; For Providing Their Wives With Homes While They Sleep On The Ground.

Ive Always Been Motivated To Stop People From Doing Dysfunctional Things.

The Average Full-time Working Male Works More Than A Full-time Working Female.

People Who Work 44 Hours Per Week Make 50 Percent More Than People Who Work 34 Hours A Week.

Men Have Not Stacked The Decks Against Women.

The Weakness Of Men Is The Facade Of Strength; The Strength Of Women Is The Facade Of Weakness.

When A Man Is Able To Connect With His Feelings, He Is Able To Care More.

Blacks Are Six Times More Likely Than Whites To Be Victims Of Homicides.

So Long As You Create Laws That Define Women As Victims, As Creatures That Demand Protection, That Need Bodyguards, You Are Going To Perpetuate The Very Worst Of Our Sexist Past.

Somehow, Women's Romance Novels Are Not Titled He Stopped When I Said "no". They Are, Though, Titled Sweet Savage Love, In Which The Woman Rejects The Hand Of Her Gentler Lover Who Saves Her From The Rapist And Marries The Man Who Repeatedly And Savagely Rapes Her. It Is This "marry The Rapist" Theme That Not Only Turned Sweet Savage Love Into A Best-seller But Also Into One Of Women's Most Enduring Romance Novels.

It Evolved From My Experience In The Fifties, Growing Up During The Mccarthy Era, And Hearing A Lot Of Assumptions That America Was Wonderful And Communism Was Terrible.

Alan Alda Is Loved Not Because He's Sensitive, But Because He's Successful And Sensitive.

A Shared Choice Movement Sees The Fetus As The Genes Of A Woman And The Genes Of A Man; The Flesh Of The Woman, The Flesh Of The Man; The Bone Of A Woman, The Bone Of A Man; The Responsibility Of A Woman, The Responsibility Of A Man; The Rights Of A Woman, The Rights Of A Man. It Desires A Transition To Equality.

When We Commit Violence Against An Infant Girl, We Call It Child Abuse; When We Commit Violence Against An Infant Boy, We Call It Circumcision.

If My Parents Had Made Love A Tenth Of A Second Earlier Or Later, I Wouldn't Exist. What An Enormous Miracle, Just Being Given Life.

Men Will Not Change As Long As Women 'marry Up.' Men Won't Change Until We Have A Perspective On How Powerless Power Makes Us. A Woman Cannot Help A Man Change Until She Has A Perspective On How Powerless Power Makes Men.

Male Bashing Is Everywhere. It Would Be A Mistake To View The Current Situation As Another Skirmish In The War Between The Sexes. Women Have Been Doing The Shooting, And Men Have Been Burying Their Heads In The Sand, Hoping The Bullets Will Miss.

The World Increasingly Allows Girls To Be Whoever They Wish To Be - Homemaker, Mother, Secretary, Executive.

Together, We Came To Understand How We Beg Men To Express Feelings, But Then When Men Do Express Feelings, We Call It Sexism, Male Chauvinism, Or Backlash.

The Government As Substitute Husband Did For Women What Labor Unions Still Have Not Accomplished For Men. And Men Pay Dues For Labor Unions; The Taxpayer Pays The Dues For Feminism. Feminism And Government Soon Become Taxpayer-supported Women's Unions.

The Government Passed More Laws To Protect Women From Dirty Jokes Than To Protect Men From Death By Faulty Rafters At A Construction Site.

With Men, We Blame The Victim. We Blame Men Because We Have Camouflaged Men's Victimization By Teaching Men To Also Be The Victimizer. Men's Victimizer Status Camouflages Men's Victim Status.

And Then In 1956 Or 1957 My Family Went Over To Europe And I Moved Over With Them, And Immediately People In Europe Thought My Perspective On That Issue Was 100% Correct.

It Certainly Has Not Been In My Self-interest To Defend Men.

As Long As Society Tells Men To Be The Salespersons Of Sex, It Is Sexist For Society To Put Only Men In Jail If They Sell Well. We Don't Put Other Salespersons In Jail For Buying Clients Drinks And Successfully Transforming A "no" Into A "maybe" Into A "yes." If The Client Makes A Choice To Drink Too Much And The "yes" Turns Out To Be A Bad Decision, It Is The Client Who Gets Fired, Not The Salesperson.

A Man Convicted Of Murder Is Twenty Times More Likely Than A Woman Convicted Of Murder To Receive The Death Penalty. Since The 1976 Reinstatement Of The Death Penalty, 120 Men And Only 1 Woman Have Actually Been Executed. The Woman, From North Carolina, Said She Preferred To Be Executed. In North Carolina, A Man Who Commits Second-degree Murder Receives A Sentence On Average Of 12.6 Years Longer Than A Woman Who Commits Second-degree Murder.

Financial Analysts Make A Lot More Than Accountants.

The More The Father Is Involved, The More Easily The Child Makes Open, Receptive, And Trusting Contact With New People In Its Life.

Survey 2001: Men Who Never Married, Never Had A Child, Worked Full Time And Were College Educated Earn Only 85% Of What Women With The Same Criteria Earn.

All Women's Issues Are To Some Degree Men's Issues And All Men's Issues Are To Some Degree Women's Issues Because When Either Sex Wins Unilaterally Both Sexes Lose.

Asking The Legal System To Resolve Divorce Is Like Asking A Boxing Coach To Be Our Marriage Counselor.

Men Are Likely To Be Quite Generous, Especially Financially.

And With The Rape, I Was Showing Why The Rape Statistics Are Exaggerated, And Saying That Date Rape Was Much More Complex Than The Way Feminists Had Portrayed It, As Men Oppressing Women.

Sexual Harassment Legislation Feels Unfair To Men Because If They Sued Over An Ethnic Joke, Or Over A Woman Discussing Pornography Or Asking Them Out, They'd Be Laughed Out Of The Company.

I'm Not Saying That Men Make Better Fathers Than Women Do Mothers.

We Can Decrease Abuse And Murder When We Get That For Both Sexes, Abuse Does Not Derive From Power, But Powerlessness.

Sexual Harassment In The Workplace Confuses Rewards For Performance With Rewards For Attractiveness And Sexual Availability.

When A Man Is Forced Into Early Retirement, He Is Often Being 'given Up For A Younger Man.' Being Forced Into Early Retirement Can Be To A Man What Being 'given Up For A Younger Woman' Is For A Woman... Why Do Many Men Get More Upset By Retirement Than Women Do From The Empty Nest When Their Children Leave Home? When Females Retire From Children, They Can Try A Career; When A Man Retires From A Career, His Children Are Gone.

Without Husbands, Women Have To Focus On Earning More. They Work Longer Hours, They're Willing To Relocate And They're More Likely To Choose Higher-paying Fields Like Technology.

The 'enduring Theme' [in Fiction] Of Male Competition And Female Competition For The Hero/survivor Has Taken Us From The Fittest Surviving To The Brink Of No One Surviving. Sex Roles Have Gone From Functional To Dysfunctional Almost Overnight. This Is Why The Enduring Theme Must Be Questioned Now.

Visitation Reflects The Era Of The Absentee Father; Parent Time Influences The Re-emergence Of The Involved Father. Visitation Reflects The Destruction Of The Family; Parent Time Influences The Reconstruction Of The Family. Parent Time Influences An Era That Understands That As Either Parent Loses, So Lose The Children.

It Is In The Interests Of Both Sexes To Hear The Other Sex's Experience Of Powerlessness.

Unless A Woman Asks Men Out (the First Time) As Often As Men Ask Her Out, Then The Assertion 'he Asked Me Out, Therefore He Pays' Is Just A Double Jeopardy Of The Male Role: He Must Not Only Do The Asking, He Must Pay Extra For Risking Extra Rejection.

[this Is] The Basis Of The Innocent Woman Defense The Innocent Woman Principle:;: Women Are Believed When They Say They Are Innocent Of Violence And Most Easily Doubted When They Say They Are Guilty Of Violence.

Sex Role Training Becomes Divorce Training.

A Man Perceives Himself As Owning And Being Owned By A Woman.

This Is The First Time In History That We've Had This Level Of Luxury, So We Have A New Opportunity To Rethink The Way We Approach God.

Self-help Books For Those Who Believe 'you Can Have It All' Often Advise, 'follow Your Bliss And Money Will Follow.' With The Collapse Of The Stock Markets The Reality Of Trade-offs Is More Like, 'when You Follow Your Bliss, It's Money You'll Miss.'

Men Are Fair, And They Have Learned Not To Personalize Anger - They Can Disagree With You And Argue To The Bone, But Afterward They Still Consider You A Nice Person With Whom The Underlying Human Relationship Need Not Be Altered.

Every Movement Has Radicals. But The Important Thing Is That The Radicals Are Not The Leaders.

The Legal Bias For Special Protection For Women Has Begun To Wreak Havoc With The Constitution's Guarantee Of Equal Protection.

We Always Look At The 'fortune ,' And We Say, Men In Power, But We Don't Look At The Glass Cellar As Opposed To The Glass Ceiling And Say, Men Also Are The Homeless, Men Are Also The Ones That Are The Garbage Collectors. Men Are Also The Ones Dying In Construction Sites That Aren't Properly Supervised For Safety Hazards.

I Am A Men's Liberationist (or "masculist") When Men's Liberation Is Defined As Equal Opportunity And Equal Responsibility For Both Sexes. I Am A Feminist When Feminism Favors Equal Opportunities And Responsibilities For Both Sexes. I Oppose Both Movements When Either Says Our Sex Is The Oppressed Sex, Therefore, "we Deserve Rights." That's Not Gender Liberation But Gender Entitlement. Ultimately, I Am In Favor Of Neither A Women's Movement Nor A Men's Movement But A Gender Transition Movement.

Nobody Has Said To Men, It Is Ok If You Want To Be A Full-time Dad; Find A Woman Who Will Support You.

When Men In Relationships Have More Money, We Say They Have The Power. When Women In Relationships Have More Money, We Say They Are Being Used.

I Started To Get Very Well Recognized In The Early Seventies As The Only Man In The United States Who Had Been Elected Three Times To The Board Of Now In New York City.

And We Reduce Almost All Male-female Problems By Working On Both The Female And The Male. And That Usually Means Having Both Sexes Take Responsibility.

Only When A Woman Shares Male Risks Can She Really Begin To Understand Men.

The Problem With Every Judgment Of Sexual Behavior Is That It Is Made By People Who Aren't Being Stimulated As They Are Making The Judgment. A Jury That Sees A Woman In A Sterile Courtroom, Asks Her What She Wanted, And Then Assumes That Anything Else She Did Was The Responsibility Of The Man Is Insulting Not Only The Woman But The Power Of Sex.

When A Dad Admits He Is Wrong Or Asks For Help, He Allows The Child To See Him- Or Herself As Adequate Even When She Or He Is Also Wrong. It Encourages Children To Make Suggestions And, Therefore, To Discover Their Creativity Because They Have A Chance Of Making A Contribution.

If We Hold The Married Man Accountable For Finances Gone Legally Awry, Then The Married Woman Should Be Held Accountable For Children Who Go Awry.

People Who Get Higher Pay Are More Willing To Relocate--especially To Undesirable Locations At The Company's Behest... A Corporate Secretary May Change Companies In The Same Town; A Corporate Executive Is More Likely To Change Towns With The Same Company. A Talented Corporate Secretary Sees An Invitation To Relocate As An Invitation; A Future Corporate Executive Sees An Invitation To Relocate As An Opportunity--and An Obligation.

After A Divorce, Men's Biggest Fear Is, Typically, Losing Their Children (women's Is Poverty).

The Sexist Perception That Violence By Anyone Against Only Women Is Anti-woman While Violence By A Woman Against Only Men Is Just Generic Violence Creates A Political Demand For Laws That Are Even More Protective Of Women.

Programs Like Wic (women, Infants, And Children) Subsidize The Exclusion Of Dads.

By Starving Our Children Of Men, We Have Made Them More Vulnerable To The Very Abuse We Are Trying To Prevent.

I Found That Women Entrepreneurs Earn 50% Less Than Their Male Counterparts.

I Feel Awed By The Mystery Of Being Both So Finite And Yet So Infinite, So Much And So Little, So Conscious And Yet, So Coincidental.

Without Children, Men Have More Liberty To Earn Less - That Is, They Are Free To Pursue More Fulfilling And Less Lucrative Careers, Like Writing Or Art Or Teaching Social Studies.

Our Focus On Discrimination Against Women During The Past 30 Years Has Blinded Us To Opportunities For Women.

Perhaps The Most Prevailing Expectation Of Men Is Our Superman Expectation: The Fear We Are Merely Clark Kents Who Won't Be Accepted Unless We Are A Superman.

When We Suggest That Men Are At The Top Because Men Discriminate, We Miss The Point. Men Are At The Top Of The Work Hierarchy Because Work Has Been Primarily Men's Responsibility.

If Women Had To Promise To Provide For A Man For A Lifetime Before He Removed His Veil And Showed Her His Smile, Would We Think Of This As A System Of Female Privilege?

Men's Competitive Team Sports Focus On The Balance Between Individual Achievement And Team Achievement With The Emphasis On Team Achievement.

For Thousands Of Years, Most Marriages Were In Stage I--survival-focused. After World War Ii, Marriages Increasingly Flirted With Stage Ii--a Self-fulfillment Focus... Love's Definition Is In A Transition.

Is A Man's Body At Stake? Any Time A Man Is Asked To Work To Pay Child Support, He Is Using His Body, His Time, His Life - Not For Nine Months, But For A Minimum Of 18 To 21 Years. So The Motto Of The Feminist With Integrity Is, 'it's A Woman's And Man's Right To Choose Because It Is A Woman's And Man's Body At Stake.'

When We Hear Men Are The Greater Victims Of Crime, We Tend To Say, 'well, It's Men Hurting Other Men.' When We Hear That Blacks Are The Greater Victims, We Consider It Racist To Say, 'well, It's Blacks Hurting Blacks.' The Victim Is A Victim No Matter Who The Perpetrator Was.

At This Moment In History, Millions Of 'working Dads' Are Desiring To Do What They Do Not Feel They Have The Right To Do: Be More Devoted As A Dad, Less Devoted As A Worker. This Feeling Is Far More Ubiquitous Among Men Executives Than Women Executives In Many Areas Of The World Because, For Instance, Asia-pacific Women Executives Today Are More Than Six Times As Likely To Not Have Children Than Men Executives Are. The Asia-pacific Executive Man Is About Six Times As Likely To Be A Working Dad As An Executive Woman Is To Be A Working Mom.

Crime, Especially Crime Involving Money, Reflects The Gap Between The Expectation To Provide And The Ability To Provide... If We Really Want Men To Commit Crime As Infrequently As Women, We Can Start By Not Expecting Men To Provide For Women More Than We Expect Women To Provide For Men.

When Women Hold Off From Marrying Men, We Call It Independence. When Men Hold Off From Marrying Women, We Call It Fear Of Commitment.

Because Of The Feminist Perspective, We Have Gotten A View Of The World That Is Distorted.

The Worst Aspect Of Dating From The Perspective Of Many Men Is How Dating Can Feel To A Man Like Robbery By Social Custom - The Social Custom Of Him Taking Money Out Of His Pocket, Giving It To Her, And Calling It A Date. To A Young Man, The Worst Dates Feel Like Being Robbed And Rejected. Boys Risk Death To Avoid Rejection (e.g., By Joining The Army

Black Men, Indian Men, And Gay Men Have All Have Something In Common: They Do Not Provide An Economic Security Blanket For Women.

Our Children Are Better Served By Speaking Not Of Visitation Versus Custody, But Of Parent Time.

Feminists Often Discuss Women Having Two Jobs: Work And Children. True. But No One Discusses Those Divorced And Remarried Men Who Have Three Jobs: Work, And Two Sets Of Children To Nurture And Financially Support.

Throughout My Life I Have Always Been Amazed That People Couldn't Listen To Other People, That They Couldn't Hear Their Best Intent, That There Seemed To Be An Enormous Need To Demonize.

Both Sexes Allow Men Dentists Inside Our Mouths, But, Well, Have You Ever Let A Man Who Is A Dental Hygienist Inside Your Mouth? The Man Must Earn His Way To Our Private Places In A Way Not Required Of A Woman--he Must Become The Doctor Or The Dentist, Or Forget It.

A 2001 Survey Of Business Owners With Mbas Conducted By The Rochester Institute Of Technology Found That Money Was The Primary Motivator For Only 29% Of Women, Versus 76% Of Men. Women Prioritized Flexibility, Fulfillment, Autonomy And Safety.

Men May Be Way Behind In Creating Choices For Themselves, But Have Actually Been Quiet Supporters Of The Choices Women Want For Themselves.

Men Rarely Worry About Using Or Being Used Because All Relationships Work That Way. A Man Perceives Himself As Owning And Being Owned By A Woman. Use Is A Dirty Word Only When Theres An Imbalance In The Relationship.

It Would Be Hard To Find A Single Example In History In Which A Group That Cast More Than 50 Percent Of The Vote Got Away With Calling Itself The Victim... Women Are The Only 'oppressed' Group To Share The Same Parents As The 'oppressor'; To Be Born Into The Middle Class And Upper Class As Frequently As The 'oppressor'; To Own More Of The Culture's Luxury Items Than The 'oppressor'.

For Example, The Equivalent Of A Woman Being Treated As A Sex Object Is A Man Being Treated As A Success Object.

It Is Ironic That A Movement That Made Its Reputation Championing The Irrelevance Of Biological Differences When Those Differences Were To Most Women's Disadvantage Immediately Returned To Biological Determinism When Those Differences Were To The Most Women's Advantage.

If A Woman Isn't Being Hazed, She's Not Being Tested; Therefore, She Is Not Being Trusted.

A Man Cannot Tell Whether A Woman Is In Love With Him Or His Security Blanket Until She Is Financially And Psychologically Independent Enough To Leave. Until A Woman Has Learned How To Leave, Even She Cannot Be Sure She Has Learned To Love.

When Only Men Could Register To Vote, We Required Only Men To Register For The Draft. Today Both Sexes Can Vote, But Only Men Must Register For The Draft.

The Only Men Who Aren't In Fear Of Women's Reactions Are Usually Men Who Aren't Born Or Who Are Dead.

On A Deeper Level, If Our Sons Are Learning They Are Obscene, Disgusting, And Untrustworthy, Is This The Best Preparation For Fatherhood? And Is It The Best Preparation For Becoming A Mother - To Feel This Way About Her Son?

I Am Often Asked Why Men Don't Get As Worked Up As They Might About Women - Particularly Poor Women - Having To Use Their Bodies As Prostitutes. Because Most Men Unconsciously Experience Themselves As Prostitutes Every Day - The Miner, The Firefighter, The Construction Worker, The Logger, The Soldier, The Meatpacker - These Men Are Prostitutes In The Direct Sense: They Sacrifice Their Bodies For Money And For Their Families.

Construction Workers

I Would Suggest That Just As Women Who Make It In The World Of Business Need Male Business Mentors, Perhaps Men Who Make It In The World Of Emotions Will Need Female Emotional Mentors.

So We've Moved From An Era When Women's Biology Was Women's Destiny To Today, Which Is An Era In Which Men's Biology Is Men's Destiny.

On An Unconscious Level, The Demonization Of Sexuality Usually Implies The Demonization Of Males And The Victimization Of Females.

A Woman With Organizing Skills Can Run A Construction Company Without Ever Picking Up A Hammer And Nail.

As I Looked More Carefully At The Listening Matrix I Saw That During The Past Twenty Years We Had Taken A Magnifying Glass To The First Of These Four Quadrants, The Female Experience Of Powerlessness. I Saw I Was Subconsciously Making A False Assumption: The More Deeply I Understood Women's Experience Of Powerlessness, The More I Assumed Men Had The Power Women Did Not Have. In Fact, What I Was Understanding Was The Female Experience Of Male Power.

When A Parent Denies A Child Its Parent Time, That Parent Is Denying The Child Its Child Support - Its Psychological Child Support.

Here's The Pay Paradox That Why Men Earn More Explains: Men Earn More Money, Therefore Men Have More Power; And Men Earn More Money, Therefore Men Have Less Power (earning More Money As An Obligation, Not An Option). The Opposite Is True For Women: Women Earn Less Money, Therefore Women Have Less Power; And Women Earn Less Money, Therefore Women Have More Power (the Option To Raise Children, Or To Not Take A Hazardous Job).

Male-female Fusion Does Not Create Women's Rights. It Creates A Fusion Of Rights.

When I Feel Very Loved, When I Nurture And Support People, My Experience Is Deepened. I Feel Connected To A Larger Purpose And Meaning.

One Danger Of A Man Succeeding Is That It Teaches His Wife And Daughter Not To Worry About Success.

Employers Are Not Prohibited From Practicing Sex Discrimination In Hiring And Promoting Employees.

Being Forced Into Early Retirement Can Be To A Man What Being "given Up For A Younger Woman" Is For A Woman.

One Can Make A Case That Says That Since 85% Of Children Being Brought Up In Single Family Homes Are Being Brought Up By Women That About 85% Of Elementary School Teachers Should Be Males To Balance Out The Feminization That The Boys And Girls Receive.

Our Main Reasons For Fearing Males Having Sex With Males Is That You Really Had To Construct A More Powerful Social Role To Keep Men In Their Place Than You Did To Keep Women In Their Place.

It Is Important For A Father Who Feels Pushed Away [by The Mom] To Say, In Effect, When You Do That, I Feel Unwanted As A Father, Or I Feel My Rough-housing Is Not Bad Parenting; It's My Contribution To Helping Our Child Take Risks. Women Cannot Hear What Men Do Not Say.

Men Tuned Into Women But Not Tuned Into Their Own Hurts Usually Retained The Attitude That Women Needed Special Protection.

Perhaps The Best Reason To Consider The Hard Sciences Is That, Well, One Study Suggests Science, Engineering, Medicine, And Dentistry Graduates Live Longer Than Arts Graduates (or Law Grads). So Whatever Money You Make You Can Keep A Bit Longer.

Women's Scars And Rituals Involved Beauty (piercing Ears And Noses, Binding Feet, And Wearing Corsets); Men's Involved Protecting Women. In Cultures In Which Physical Strength Is Still The Best Way To Protect Women, As Among The Dodos In Uganda, Each Time A Man Kills A Man, He Is Awarded A Ritual Scar; The More Scars, The More He Is Considered Eligible.

Although A Government Study Found That Men's Health Was Much Worse Than Women's Health Or The Health Of Any Minority Group, Headlines Around The Country Read: 'minorities Face Large Health Care Gap.' They Did Not Say: 'men Face Large Health Care Gap.' Why? Because We Associate The Sacrifice Of Men's Lives With The Saving Of The Rest Of Us, And This Association Leads Us To Carry In Our Unconscious An Incentive Not To Care About Men Living Longer.

The Most Unacknowledged Spending Expectation Among Women Is The Amount Of Time Spent By Single Mothers Caring For Children, Not Only Physically, But Psychologically. It Is My Feeling That Only A Small Percentage Of A Mother's Time Is Normally Compensated For By Child Support, Given What A Woman Could Make Adding These Hours To Workforce Hours. It Is Why Women Who Have Never Been Married And Never Had Children Earn So Much More In The Workplace Than Women Who Have Had Children.

In A Sense, In The Area Of Child Care, Children's Relationships With Parents' Working Has Come Full Circle. We Have Gone From The Mom-and-pop Store (or Mom-and-pop Farm), With Its Integration Of Child Care And Work, To Children-at-home And Dad-at-work; To The Mom-plus-daddy Working At Home, With Its Integration Of Childcare And Work Again. From Mom-and-pop Back To Mom-and-pop.

Every Day, Almost As Many Men Are Killed At Work As Were Killed During The Average Day In Vietnam. For Men, There Are, In Essence, Three Male-only Drafts: The Draft Of Men To All The Wars; The Draft Of Everyman To Unpaid Bodyguard; The Draft Of Men To All The Hazardous Jobs Or 'death Professions.

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T. Boone Pickens

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