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Empathic Listening Takes Time, But It Doesn't Take Anywhere Near As Much Time As It Takes To Back Up And Correct Misunderstandings When You're Already Miles Down The Road; To Redo; To Live With Unexpressed And Unsolved Problems; To Deal With The Results Of Not Giving People Psychological Air.

-Stephen Covey

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Empathic Listening Takes Time,

Stephen Covey

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Empathic Listening Takes Time, But It Doesn't Take Anywhere Near As Much Time As It Takes To Back Up And Correct Misunderstandings When You're Already Miles Down The Road; To Redo; To Live With Unexpressed And Unsolved Problems; To Deal With The Results Of Not Giving People Psychological Air.

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We Value The Clock For Its Speed And Efficiency. The Clock Has Its Place, Efficiency Has Its Place, After Effectiveness. The Symbol Of Effectiveness Is The Compass A Sense Of Direction, Purpose, Vision, Perspective, And Balance. But The Empowerment Process Itself Is Not Efficient.

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One Thing's For Sure. If We Keep Doing What We're Doing, We're Going To Keep Getting What We're Getting. One Definition Of Insanity Is To Keep Doing The Same Thing And Expect Different Results.

When The Trust Is High, You Get The Trust Dividend. Investors Invest In Brands People Trust. Consumers Buy More From Companies They Trust, They Spend More With Companies They Trust, They Recommend Companies They Trust, And They Give Companies They Trust The Benefit Of The Doubt When Things Go Wrong.

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Private Victory Precedes Public Victory. Algebra Comes Before Calculus.

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Being Proactive Is More Than Taking Initiative. It Is Recognizing That We Are Responsible For Our Own Choices And Have The Freedom To Choose Based On Principles And Values Rather Than On Moods Or Condition. Proactive People Are Agents Of Change And Choose Not To Be Victims, To Be Reactive, Or To Blame Others.

Our Lives Are The Results Of Our Choices. To Blame And Accuse Other People, The Environment, Or Other Extrinsic Factors Is To Choose To Empower Those Things To Control Us.

Empathic Listening Takes Time, But It Doesn't Take Anywhere Near As Much Time As It Takes To Back Up And Correct Misunderstandings When You're Already Miles Down The Road; To Redo; To Live With Unexpressed And Unsolved Problems; To Deal With The Results Of Not Giving People Psychological Air.

In Many Situations Involving Service Recovery - The Problem Itself Became The Catalyst For The Creation Of Even Greater Trust As The Companies Took The Issues Head-on And Worked Through The Difficult Problem In A Way That Restored Confidence.

If You Don't Know Yourself, If You Don't Control Yourself, If You Don't Have Mastery Over Yourself, It's Very Hard To Like Yourself, Except In Some Short-term, Psych-up, Superficial Way.

Whether We Are Aware Of It Or Not, Whether We Are In Control Of It Or Not, There Is A First Creation To Every Part Of Our Lives. We Are Either The Second Creation Of Our Own Proactive Design, Or We Are The Second Creation Of Other People's Agendas, Of Circumstances, Or Of Past Habits.

Frustration Is A Function Of Our Expectations.

As You Live Your Values, Your Sense Of Identity, Integrity, Control, And Inner-directedness Will Infuse You With Both Exhilaration And Peace. You Will Define Yourself From Within, Rather Than By People's Opinions Or By Comparisons To Others.

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Personal Development

"if I Make Deposits Into An Emotional Bank Account With You Through Courtesy, Kindness, Honesty, And Keeping My Commitments To You, I Build Up A Reserve. Your Trust Toward Me Becomes Higher, And I Can Call Upon That Trust Many Times If I Need To. I Can Even Make Mistakes And That Trust Level, That Emotional Reserve, Will Compensate For It. My Communication May Not Be Clear, But You'll Get My Meaning Anyway. You Won't Make Me "an Offender For A Word." When The Trust Account Is High, Communication Is Easy, Instant, And Effective."

The Only Person I Know, Is The Person I Want To Be

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But Borrowing Strength Builds Weakness.

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The Way We See Things Is The Source Of The Way We Think Or The Way We Act

What One Great Idea Resonates Deeper In The Soul Than Any Other...that We Are Free To Choose. Next To Life Itself, The Power To Choose Is Your Greatest Gift.

Character Grows In The Soil Of Experience With The Fertilization Of Example, The Moisture Of Ambition, And The Sunshine Of Satisfaction. Character Cannot Be Purchased, Bargained For, Inherited, Rented Or Imported From Afar. It Must Be Home-grown. Purely Intellectual Development Without Commensurate Internal Character Development Makes As Much Sense As Putting A High-powered Sports Car In The Hands Of A Teenager Who Is High On Drugs. Yet All Too Often In The Academic World, That's Exactly What We Do By Not Focusing On The Character Development Of Young People.

Leadership Without Mutual Trust Is A Contradiction In Terms.

In The Long Run, You Can Never Accomplish A Worthy End With An Unworthy Means.

If We Live Out Of Our Memory, We're Tied To The Past And To That Which Is Finite. When We Live Out Of Our Imagination, We're Tied To That Which Is Infinite.

Whenever You Experience Stress Of Any Kind, Look Into Yourself And Ask, In What Way Am I Compromising My Innermost Values In This Situation?

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Strategy Is Important, But Trust Is The Hidden Variable. On Paper You Can Have Clarity Around Your Objectives, But In A Low-trust Environment, Your Strategy Won't Be Executed.

It's Better To Be Trusted Than To Be Liked.

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The Deepest Desire Of The Human Spirit Is To Be Acknowledged.

Vision Is Seeing A Future State With The Mind's Eye. Vision Is Applied Imagination.

It Takes Humility To Seek Feedback. It Takes Wisdom To Understand It, Analyze It And Appropriately Act On It.

Keep In Mind That You Are Always Saying "no" To Something. If It Isn't To The Apparent And Urgent Things In Your Life, It Is Probably To The Most Fundamental, Highly Important Things.

I Believe That God Is The Source Of All The Universal, Timeless Principles. And To Him, I Give All The Credit And The Glory. However, To A Person Who Is Not Religious, I Believe They Can Live To The Highest Level Of Their Conscience And Develop Spiritual Intelligence That Surpasses Most People, Including Many Religious People, Who Profess But Do Not Practice.

We Simply Assume That The Way We See Things Is The Way They Really Are Or The Way They Should Be. And Our Attitudes And Behaviors Grow Out Of These Assumptions.

Principle-centered People Are Constantly Educated By Their Experiences.

Being Humble Does Not Mean Being Weak, Reticent, Or Self-effacing. It Means Recognizing Principle And Putting It Ahead Of Self. It Means Standing Firmly For Principle, Even In The Fact Of Opposition.

If You Want The Secondary Greatness Of Recognized Talent, Focus First On Primary Greatness Of Character.

To Set And Work Toward Any Goal Is An Act Of Courage.

Acts Of Courage

Until We Take How We See Ourselves (and How We See Others) Into Account, We Will Be Unable To Understand How Others See And Feel About Themselves And Their World. Unaware, We Will Project Our Intentions On Their Behavior And Call Ourselves Objective.

When Life Does Not Go Our Way Or We Inadvertently Make A Mistake, It Is So Easy To Make Excuses, Place Blame On Others, Or Argue That Circumstances Were Against Us. But We Only Progress In Life To The Extent That We Take Responsibility For Our Actions And Attitudes, And Put Forth The Initiative Necessary To Create Our Own Circumstances.

Nothing Is As Fast As The Speed Of Trust.

The Need To Leave A Legacy Is Our Spiritual Need To Have A Sense Of Meaning, Purpose, Personal Congruence, And Contribution.

If You Can Hire People Whose Passion Intersects With The Job, They Won't Require Any Supervision At All. They Will Manage Themselves Better Than Anyone Could Ever Manage Them. Their Fire Comes From Within, Not From Without. Their Motivation Is Internal, Not External.

When You Show Deep Empathy Toward Others, Their Defensive Energy Goes Down, And Positive Energy Replaces It. That's When You Can Get More Creative In Solving Problems.

Most Learning Is Social, Or What I Call The Cultural Dna. Everyone Knows That Word Of Mouth Advertising Is The Best Advertising. That's Social Learning.

The Place To Begin Building Any Relationship Is Inside Ourselves, Inside Our Circle Of Influence, Our Own Character.

Trust Is The Highest Form Of Human Motivation.

Principles Are Natural Laws That Are External To Us And That Ultimately Control The Consequences Of Our Actions. Values Are Internal And Subjective And Represent That Which We Feel Strongest About In Guiding Our Behavior.

When You Study The Lives Of All Great Achievers-those Who Have Had The Greatest Influence On Others, Those Who Have Made Things Happen-you Will Find A Pattern. Through Their Persistent Efforts And Inner Struggle, They Have Greatly Expanded Their Four Native Human Intelligences Or Capacities. The Highest Manifestations Of These Four Intelligences Are: For Mental, Vision; For The Physical, Discipline; For The Emotional, Passion; For The Spiritual, Conscience. These Manifestations Also Represent Our Highest Means Of Expressing Our Voice.

To Receive Gratitude With Grace Is A Form Of Gratitude By Itself, And Not Always An Easy Art To Master.

The Greatest Risk Is The Risk Of Riskless Living.

Most People Say Their Main Fault Is A Lack Of Discipline. On Deeper Thought, I Believe This Is Not The Case. The Basic Problem Is That Their Priorities Have Not Become Deeply Planted In Their Hearts And Minds.

The Key Is In Not Spending Time, But In Investing It.

Before A Performance, A Sales Presentation, A Difficult Confrontation, Or The Daily Challenge Of Meeting A Goal, See It Clearly, Vividly, Relentlessly, Over And Over Again. Create An Internal "comfort Zone". Then, When You Get Into The Situation, It Isn't Foreign. It Doesn't Scare You.

There's No Better Way To Inform And Expand You Mind On A Regular Basis Than To Get Into The Habit Of Reading Good Literature.

Almost Every Significant Breakthrough Is The Result Of A Courageous Break With Traditional Ways Of Thinking.

Passion Is The Fire, Enthusiasm And Courage That An Individual Feels When She Is Doing Something She Loves While Accomplishing Worthy Ends, Something That Satisfies Her Deepest Needs.

All Broken Relationships Can Be Traced Back To Broken Agreements

Broken Relationship

As Long As You Think The Problem Is Out There, That Very Thought Is The Problem

Positive Thinking

The Ability To Manage Well Doesn't Make Much Difference If You're Not Even In The Right Jungle.

When We Succumb To Believing That We Are Victims Of Our Circumstances And Yield To The Plight Of Determinism, We Lose Hope, We Lose Drive, And We Settle Into Resignation And Stagnation.

The Essence Of Synergy Is To Value Differences-to Respect Them, To Build On Strengths, To Compensate For Weaknesses

Look At The Weaknesses Of Others With Compassion, Not Accusation. It's Not What They're Not Doing Or Should Be Doing That's The Issue. The Issue Is Your Own Chosen Response To The Situation And What You Should Be Doing. If You Start To Think The Problem Is "out There," Stop Yourself. That Thought Is The Problem.

If My Sense Of Security Lies In My Reputation Or In The Things I Have, My Life Will Be In A Constant State Of Threat And Jeopardy-a Fear That These Possessions May Be Lost, Stolen, Or Devalued. If I'm In The Presence Of Someone Of Greater Net Worth, Fame, Or Status, I Feel Inferior. If I'm In The Presence Of Someone Of Lesser Net Worth, Fame Or Status, I Feel Superior. My Sense Of Self-worth Constantly Fluctu-ates. I Don't Have Any Sense Of Constancy, Anchorage, Or Persistent Selfhood. I Am Constantly Trying To Protect And Insure My Assets, Properties, Securities, Position, Or Reputation.

Where You Are Headed Is More Important Than How Fast You Are Going. Rather Than Always Focusing On What's Urgent, Learn To Focus On What Is Really Important.

Almost All Of The World-class Athletes And Other Peak Performers Are Visualizers. They See It; They Feel It; They Experience It Before Hey Actually Do It. They Begin With The End In Mind.

To Judge Individuals Before Understanding Them Is A Form Of Human Rejection And Feeds Upon Itself.

Paradigms Are Powerful Because They Create The Lens Through Which We See The World.

Role Modeling Is The Most Basic Responsibility Of Parents. Parents Are Handing Life's Scripts To Their Children, Scripts That In All Likelihood Will Be Acted Out For The Rest Of The Children's Lives.

If We Know How To Listen To Our Own Heart, We Can Listen To The Hearts Of Others.

All The Well-meaning Advice In The World Won't Amount To A Hill Of Beans If We're Not Even Addressing The Real Problem.

You Can Say You Love Someone - But Unless You Demonstrate That Love Through Your Actions, Your Words Become Meaningless.

Our Character Is Basically A Composite Of Our Habits.

The Environment You Fashion Out Of Your Thoughts, Your Beliefs, Your Ideals, Your Philosophy Is The Only Climate You Will Ever Live In. The Key Is In Not Spending Time, But In Investing It.

I Think That [respect For People] Is Of Profound Importance Because It Means You Are Caring And You Trust Them To Do The Right Thing.

Begin With The End In Mind.

Anytime We Think The Problem Is 'out There,' That Thought Is The Problem. We Empower What's Out There To Control Us. The Change Paradigm Is 'outside-in' - What's Out There Has To Change Before We Can Change. The Proactive Approach Is To Change From The 'inside-out': To Be Different, And By Being Different, To Effect Positive Change In What's Out There - I Can Be More Resourceful, I Can Be More Diligent, I Can Be More Creative, I Can Be More Cooperative.

As A Principle-centered Person You Try To Stand Apart From The Emotion Of The Situation And From Other Factors That Would Act On You, And Evaluate The Options. Looking At The Balanced Whole-the Work Needs, The Family Needs, The Other Needs That May Be Involved, And The Possible Implications Of The Various Alternatives - You'll Try To Come Up With The Best Solution Taking All Factors Into Consideration. We Are Limited But We Can Push Back The Borders Of Our Limitations.

People Can't Live With Change If There's Not A Changeless Core Inside Them.

Happiness Can Be Defined, In Part At Least, As The Fruit Of The Desire And Ability To Sacrifice What We Want Now For What We Want Eventually.

Those Who Get The Most Out Of Life And Those Who Give The Most Are Those Who Make The Choice To Act.

You Don't See The World As It Is, You See It According To Who You Are.

Executives Need To Understand The Economic Benefits Of Trust Dividend, Especially When The Behavior Is Real, Not Artificially Or Superficially Created As Pr To Manipulate Trust.

Sometimes Poor Behavior Is Simply Bad Execution Of Good Intent.

Quality Relationships Are Built On Principles, Especially The Principle Of Trust.

When You Have A Challenge And The Response Is Equal To The Challenge, That's Called 'success'. But Once You Have A New Challenge, The Old, Once-successful Response No Longer Works. That's Why It Is Called A 'failure'.

I Think The Most Significant Work We'll Do In Our Whole Life, In Our Whole World Is Done Within The Four Walls Of Our Home.

True Independence Of Character Empowers Us To Act Rather Than Be Acted Upon.

Make Small Commitments And Keep Them. Be A Light, Not A Judge. Be A Model, Not A Critic. Be A Part Of The Solution, Not The Problem.

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