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Such Poverty As We Have Today In All Our Great Cities Degrades The Poor, And Infects With Its Degradation The Whole Neighborhood In Which They Live. And Whatever Can Degrade A Neighborhood Can Degrade A Country And A Continent And Finally The Whole Civilized World, Which Is Only A Large Neighborhood.

-George Bernard Shaw

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Such Poverty As We

George Bernard Shaw

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Such Poverty As We Have Today In All Our Great Cities Degrades The Poor, And Infects With Its Degradation The Whole Neighborhood In Which They Live. And Whatever Can Degrade A Neighborhood Can Degrade A Country And A Continent And Finally The Whole Civilized World, Which Is Only A Large Neighborhood.

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We Must Reform Society Before We Can Reform Ourselves.

My Friend, When A Man Has Anything To Tell In This World, The Difficulty Is Not To Make Him Tell It, But To Prevent Him From Telling It Too Often.

The One Point On Which All Women Are In Furious Secret Rebellion Against The Existing Law Is The Saddling Of The Right To A Child With The Obligation To Become The Servant Of A Man.

My Religious Convictions And Scientific Views Cannot At Present Be More Specifically Defined Than As Those Of A Believer In Creative Revolution. I Desire That No Public Monument Or Work Of Art Or Inscription Or Sermon Or Ritual Service Commemorating Me Shall Suggest That I Accepted The Tenets Peculiar To Any Established Church Or Denomination Nor Take The Form Of A Cross Or Any Other Instrument Of Torture Or Symbol Of Blood Sacrifice.

The Righteous Man Takes His Life In His Hand Whenever He Utters The Truth.

Never Waste Jealousy On A Real Man: It Is The Imaginary Man That Supplants Us All In The Long Run.

Ladies And Gentlemen Are Permitted To Have Friends In The Kennel, But Not In The Kitchen.

In An Article On Bunyan Lately Published In The "contemporary Review" - The Only Article On The Subject Worth Reading On The Subject I Ever Saw (yes, Thank You, I Am Familiar With Macaulay's Patronizing Prattle About "the Pilgrim's Progress") Etc.

What Is Wrong With The Prosaic Englishman Is What Is Wrong With The Prosaic Men Of All Countries: Stupidity.

Time Enough To Think Of The Future When You Haven't Any Future To Think Of.

Medical Science Is As Yet Very Imperfectly Differentiated From Common Cure-mongering Witchcraft

Medical Science

The Universal Regard For Money Is The One Hopeful Fact In Our Civilization.

All Industries Are Brought Under The Control Of Such People [film Producers] By Capitalism. If The Capitalists Let Themselves Be Seduced From Their Pursuit Of Profits To The Enchantments Of Art, They Would Be Bankrupt Before They Knew Where They Were. You Cannot Combine The Pursuit Of Money With The Pursuit Of Art.

Plato Long Ago Pointed Out The Importance Of Being Governed By Men With Sufficient Sense Of Responsibility And Comprehension Of Public Duties To Be Very Reluctant To Undertake The Work Of Governing.

A Fool-proof Method For Sculpting An Elephant: First, Get A Huge Block Of Marble; Then You Chip Away Everything That Doesn't Look Like An Elephant.

What Is The Use Of Straining After An Amiable View Of Things, When A Cynical View Is Most Likely To Be The True One?.

The Theory That Music Has A Depraving Effect On Morals Has Now Been Abandoned To The Old Women Of Both Sexes.

Higgins. Have You No Morals, Man? Doolittle [unabashed] Cant Afford Them, Governor. Neither Could You If You Was As Poor As Me.

But To Admire A Strong Person And To Live Under That Strong Person’s Thumb Are Two Different Things.

After All, The Wrong Road Always Leads Somewhere.

Criminals Do Not Die By The Hands Of The Law. They Die By The Hands Of Other Men.

Money Is The Most Important Thing In The World. It Represents Health, Strength, Honor, Generosity, And Beauty As Conspicuously As The Want Of It Represents Illness, Weakness, Disgrace, Meanness, And Ugliness.

We All Have--to Put It As Nicely As I Can--our Lower Centres And Our Higher Centres. Our Lower Centres Act: They Act With Terriblepower That Sometimes Destroys Us; But They Don't Talk.... Since The War The Lower Centres Have Become Vocal. And The Effect Is That Of An Earthquake. For They Speak Truths That Have Never Been Spoken Before--truths That The Makers Of Our Domestic Institutions Have Tried To Ignore.

Remember That You Are A Human Being With A Soul And The Divine Gift Of Articulate Speech: That Your Native Language Is The Language Of Shakespeare And Milton And The Bible; And Don't Sit There Crooning Like A Bilious Pigeon.

Native Language

Never Forget That If You Leave Your Law To Judges And Your Religion To Bishops, You Will Presently Find Yourself Without Either Law Or Religion.

Finding Yourself

The Goal Of An Artist Is To Create The Definitive Work That Cannot Be Surpassed.

When Satan Makes Impure Verses, Allah Sends A Divine Tune To Cleanse Them.

When Commenting On The Turmoil And Disorder Of The World, If The Other Planets Are Inhabited, They Must Be Using This Earth As Their Insane Asylum.

In A Hospital They Throw You Out Into The Street Before You Are Half Cured, But In A Nursing Home They Don't Let You Out Till You Are Dead.

Hurrah For Revolution And More Cannon-shot! A Beggar Upon Horseback Lashes A Beggar On Foot. Hurrah For Revolution And Cannon Come Again! The Beggars Have Changed Places, But The Lash Goes On.

You Must All Know Half A Dozen People At Least Who Are No Use In This World, Who Are More Trouble Than They Are Worth. Just Put Them There And Say Sir, Or Madam, Now Will You Be Kind Enough To Justify Your Existence? If You Can't Justify Your Existence, If You're Not Pulling Your Weight In The Social Boat, If You're Not Producing As Much As You Consume Or Perhaps A Little More, Then, Clearly, We Cannot Use The Organizations Of Our Society For The Purpose Of Keeping You Alive, Because Your Life Does Not Benefit Us And It Can't Be Of Very Much Use To Yourself.

Love Is A Simple Thing And A Deep Thing: It Is An Act Of Life And Not An Illusion. Art Is An Illusion.

I Never Climbed Any Ladder: I Have Achieved Eminence By Sheer Gravitation.

In A Living Society Every Day Is A Day Of Judgment; And Its Recognition As Such Is Not The End Of All Things But The Beginning Ofa Real Civilization.

Assasination On The Scaffold Is The Worst Form Of Assasination, Because There It Is Invested With The Approval Of Society.

A Moderately Honest Man With A Moderately Faithful Wife, Moderate Drinkers Both, In A Moderately Healthy House: That Is The True Middle Class Unit.

Revelations: A Curious Record Of The Visions Of A Drug Addict.

If You Strike A Child, Take Care That You Strike It In Anger, Even At The Risk Of Maiming It For Life. A Blow In Cold Blood Neither Can Nor Should Be Forgiven.

If You Would Stick To The Concrete, And Put Your Discoveries In The Form Of Entertaining Anecdotes About Your Adventures With Women, Your Conversation Would Be Easier To Follow.

Decency Is Indecency's Conspiracy Of Silence

The Unconscious Self Is The Real Genius. Your Breathing Goes Wrong The Moment Your Conscious Self Meddles With It.

There Is In Man A Specific Lust For Cruelty Which Infects Even His Passion Of Pity And Makes It Savage.

People Get Nothing Out Of Books But What They Bring To Them.

When The Military Man Approaches, The World Locks Up Its Spoons And Packs Off Its Womankind.

A Man Ought To Be Able To Be Fond Of His Wife Without Making A Fool Of Himself About Her.

The Test To Which All Methods Of Treatment Are Finally Brought Is Whether They Are Lucrative To Doctors Or Not.

It's All That The Young Can Do For The Old, To Shock Them And Keep Them Up To Date.

If You Cannot Attain Knowledge Without Torturing A Dog, You Must Do Without Knowledge.

Vulgarity In A King Flatters The Majority Of The Nation.

Martyrdom, Sir, Is What These People Like: It Is The Only Way In Which A Man Can Become Famous Without Ability.

What Is The Matter With Universities Is That The Students Are School Children, Whereas It Is Of The Very Essence Of University Education That They Should Be Adults.

Revolutionary Moments Attract Those Who Are Not Good Enough For Established Institutions As Well As Those Who Are Too Good For Them.

Not Good Enough

Our Laws Make Law Impossible; Our Liberties Destroy All Freedom; Our Property Is Organized Robbery; Our Morality An Impudent Hypocrisy; Our Wisdom Is Administered By Inexperienced Or Mal-experienced Dupes; Our Power Wielded By Cowards And Weaklings; And Our Honour False In All Its Points. I Am An Enemy Of The Existing Order For Good Reasons

I Can't Turn Your Soul On. Leave Me Those Feelings; And You Can Take Away The Voice And The Face. They Are Not You.

I Can Forgive Alfred Nobel For Having Invented Dynamite, But Only A Fiend In Human Form Could Have Invented The Nobel Prize.

Without Music We Shall Surely Perish Of Drink, Morphia, And All Sorts Of Artificial Exaggerations Of The Cruder Delights Of The Senses.

The Most Tragic Thing In The World Is A Man Of Genius Who Is Not A Man Of Honor.

Nothing Soothes Me More After A Long And Maddening Course Of Pianoforte Recitals Than To Sit And Have My Teeth Drilled.

Our Political Experiment Of Democracy, The Last Refuge Of Cheap Misgovernment.

It Is Most Unwise For People In Love To Marry.

The Most Sublime Courage I Have Ever Witnessed Has Been Among That Class Too Poor To Know They Possessed It, And Too Humble For The World To Discover It.

I Have Defined The Hundred Per Cent American As Ninety-nine Per Cent An Idiot.

Assassination Is The Extreme Form Of Censorship.

I'm Only A Beer Teetotaler, Not A Champagne Teetotaler; I Don't Like Beer.

The Heretic Is Always Better Dead. And Mortal Eyes Cannot Distinguish The Saint From The Heretic.

Well, Upon My Soul! You Are Not Ashamed To Stand There And Confess Yourself A Disgusting Drunkard.

Laws, Religions, Creeds, And Systems Of Ethics, Instead Of Making Society Better Than Its Best Unit, Make It Worse Than Its Average Unit, Because They Are Never Up To Date.

Our Lives Are Shaped Not As Much By Our Experiences As By Our Expectations.

An Asylum For The Sane Would Be Empty In America.

I Prefer The Man Who Calls His Nonsense A Mystery To Him Who Who Pretends It Is A Weighed, Measured, Analyzed Fact.

All Classes In Proportion To Their Lack Of Travel And Familiarity With Foreign Literature Are Bellicose, Prejudiced Against Foreigners, Fond Of Fighting As A Cruel Sport - In Short, Dog-like In Their Notions Of Foreign Policy.

What Is The Matter With The Rich Is Uselessness.

Riches And Poors

Somemenare Bornkings; And Someare Bornstatesmen. The Two Are Seldom The Same.

When God Created Man And Woman, He Did Not Take A Patent. That's Why Any Imbecile Has Been Able To Do So Ever Since.

The Salvation Of The World Depends On The Men Who Will Not Take Evil Good-humouredly, And Whose Laughter Destroys The Fool Instead Of Encouraging Him.

We Have In England A Curious Belief In First-rate People, Meaning All The People We Do Not Know; And This Consoles Us For The Undeniable Second-rateness Of The People We Do Know.

Freedom, My Good Girl, Means Being Able To Count On How Other People Will Behave.

My Situation Is A Solemn One: Life Is Offered To Me On The Condition Of Eating Beefsteaks. But Death Is Better Than Cannibalism. My Will Contains Directions For My Funeral, Which Will Be Followed, Not By Mourning Coaches, But By Oxen, Sheep, Flocks Of Poultry, And A Small Traveling Aquarium Of Live Fish, All Wearing White Scarves In Honor Of The Man Who Perished Rather Than Eat His Fellow Creatures. It Will Be, Without The Exception Of Noah's Ark, The Most Remarkable Thing Of Its Kind Ever Seen.

Fashions Are The Only Induced Epidemics, Proving That Epidemics Can Be Induced By Tradesmen.

Nothing Is More Dreadful Than A Husband Who Keeps Telling You Everything He Thinks, And Always Wants To Know What You Think.

Give A Man Health And A Course To Steer, And He'll Never Stop To Trouble About Whether He's Happy Or Not.

What Is Self-control? It Is Nothing But A Highly Developed Vital Sense, Dominating And Regulating The Mere Appetites. To Overlook The Very Existence Of This Supreme Sense; To Miss The Obvious Inference That It Is The Quality That Distinguishes The Fittest To Survive.

Make Me A Beautiful Word For Doing Things Tomorrow; For That Surely Is A Great And Blessed Invention.

Morality Is Not Respectability.

Morality And Ethics

The Medical Profession (is) A Conspiracy To Hide Its Own Shortcomings. No Doubt The Same May Be Said Of All Professions. They Are All Conspiracies Against The Laity... (u)ntil There Is A Practicable Alternative To Blind Trust In The Doctor, The Truth About The Doctor Is So Terrible That We Dare Not Face It.

Unbounded Hopes Were Placed On Each Successive Extension Of The Electoral Franchise, Culminating In The Enfranchisement Of Women.these Hopes Have Been Disappointed, Because The Voters, Male And Female, Being Politically Untrained And Uneducated, Have (a) No Grasp Of Constructive Measures; (b) Loathe Taxation As Such; (c) Dislike Being Governed At All; And (d) Dread And Resent Any Extension Of Official Interference As An Encroachment On Their Personal Liberty.

Where There Is No Knowledge Ignorance Calls Itself Science.

Financiers Live In A World Of Illusion. They Count On Something Which They Call The Capital Of The Country, Which Has No Existence.

Imprisonment, As It Exists Today, Is A Worse Crime Than Any Of Those Committed By Its Victims.

The More I See Of The Moneyed Classes, The More I Understand The Guillotine.

This Is The True Joy Of Life-the Being Used For A Purpose Recognized By Yourself As A Mighty One, The Being Thoroughly Worn Out Before You Are Thrown To The Scrap-heap; The Being A Force Of Nature Instead Of A Feverish, Selfish Clod Of Ailments And Grievances.

Money Is Indeed The Most Important Thing In The World; And All Sound And Successful Personal And National Morality Should Have This Fact For Its Basis.

Life Is No Brief Candle To Me. It Is A Sort Of Splendid Torch Which I Have Got A Hold Of For The Moment, And I Want To Make It Burn As Brightly As Possible Before Handing It On To Future Generations.

The Novelties Of One Generation Are Only The Resuscitated Fashions Of The Generation Before Last.

Happiness And Beauty Are By-products.

Happiness And Beauty

Statistics Show That Of Those Who Contract The Habit Of Eating, Very Few Survive.

The Difference Between A Lady And A Flower Girl Is Not How She Behaves, But How She’s Treated.

The Schoolmaster Is The Person Who Takes The Children Off The Parents' Hands For A Consideration. That Is To Say, He Establishes A Child Prison, Engages A Number Of Employee Schoolmasters As Turnkeys, And Covers Up The Essential Cruelty And Unnaturalness Of The Situation By Torturing The Children If They Do Not Learn, And Calling This Process, Which Is Within The Capacity Of Any Fool Or Blackguard, By The Sacred Name Of Teaching.

If The Governments Devalue The Currency In Order To Betray All Creditors, You Politely Call This Procedure 'inflation'.

I Lay My Eternal Curse On Whomsoever Shall Now Or At Any Time Hereafter Make Schoolbooks Of My Works And Make Me Hated As Shakespeare Is Hated. My Plays Were Not Designed As Instruments Of Torture. All The Schools That Lust After Them Get This Answer, And Will Never Get Any Other.

Pothinus: "is It Possible That Caesar, The Conqueror Of The World, Has Time To Occupy Himself With Such A Trifle As Our Taxes?" Caesar: "my Friend, Taxes Are The Chief Business Of A Conqueror Of The World.

I Tell You That As Long As I Can Conceive Something Better Than Myself I Cannot Be Easy Unless I Am Striving To Bring It Into Existence Or Clearing The Way For It.

Liquor Is The Chloroform Which Enables The Poor Man To Endure The Painful Operation Of Living.

As Well Consult A Butcher On The Value Of Vegetarianism As A Doctor On The Worth Of Vaccination.

The Thief Who Is In Prison Is Not Necessarily More Dishonest Than His Fellows At Large, But Mostly One Who, Through Ignorance Or Stupidity [or Racism Or Poverty! - Draffan] Steals In A Way That Is Not Customary. He Snatches A Loaf From The Baker's Counter And Is Promptly Run Into Gaol. Another Man Snatches Bread From The Table Of Hundreds Of Widows And Orphans And Similar Credulous Souls Who Do Not Know The Ways Of Company Promoters; And, As Likely As Not, He Is Run Into Parliament.

A Doctor's Reputation Is Made By The Number Of Eminent Men Who Die Under His Care.

I Choose Not To Make A Graveyard Of My Body For The Rotting Corpses Of Dead Animals.

What, Or Who, Led You To Take Up Photography, And About What Date ? George Bernard Shaw – I Always Wanted To Draw And Paint. I Had No Literary Ambition. I Aspired To Be A Michelangelo, Not A Shakespeare. But I Could Not Draw Well Enough To Satisfy Myself; And The Instruction I Could Get Was Worse Than Useless. So When Dry Plates And Push Buttons Came Into The Market I Bought A Box Camera And Began Pushing The Button. It Was In 1898.

Women Are Not Angels. They Are As Foolish As Men In Many Ways; But They Have Had To Devote Themselves To Life Whilst Men Have Had To Devote Themselves To Death; And That Makes A Vital Difference In Male And Female Religion. Women Have Been Forced To Fear Whilst Men Have Been Forced To Dare: The Heroism Of A Woman Is To Nurse And Protect Life, And Of A Man To Destroy It And Court Death.

Truth Telling Is Not Compatible With The Defence Of The Realm.

Telling The Truth

I No Longer Desire Happiness: Life Is Nobler Than That.

My Schooling Not Only Failed To Teach Me What It Professed To Be Teaching, But Prevented Me From Being Educated To An Extent Which Infuriates Me When I Think Of All I Might Have Learned At Home By Myself.

I Have My Own Soul. My Own Spark Of Divine Fire.

There Is No Satisfaction In Hanging A Man Who Does Not Object To It.

Nothing Is Ever Accomplished By A Reasonable Man.

Everything Happens To Everybody Sooner Or Later If There Is Time Enough.

Capitalism Drives The Employers To Do Their Worst To The Employed, And The Employed To Do The Least For Them. And It Boasts All The Time Of The Incentive It Provides To Both To Do Their Best! . . . The Reason The Capitalist System Has Worked So Far Without Jamming For More Than A Few Months At A Time, And Then Only In Places, Is That It Has Not Yet Succeeded In Making A Conquest Of Human Nature So Complete That Everybody Acts On Strictly Business Principles.

A Man Who Desires To Get Married Should Know Everything Or Nothing.

Importance Of Being Earnest

Very Few People Can Afford To Be Poor.

A Man Thinking Or Working Is Always Alone, Let Him Be Where He Will.

What Is Wrong With Priests And Popes Is That Instead Of Being Apostles And Saints, They Are Nothing But Empirics Who Say I Know Instead Of I Am Learning, And Pray For Credulity And Inertia As Wise Men Pray For Skepticism And Activity.

The Quality Of A Play Is The Quality Of Its Ideas.

It Is In The Hour Of Trial That A Man Finds His True Profession.

God Is On The Side Of The Big Battalions.

The Great Advantage Of A Hotel Is That It Is A Refuge From Home Life.

Man Is Unique In That He Has Plans, Purpose And Goals Which Require The Need For Criteria Of Choice. The Need For Ethical Value Is Within Man Whose Future May Largely Be Determined By The Choice He Make

You Are My Inspiration And My Folly. You Are My Light Across The Sea, My Million Nameless Joys, And My Day's Wage. You Are My Divinity, My Madness, My Selfishness, My Transfiguration And Purification. You Are My Rapscallionly Fellow Vagabond, My Tempter And Star. I Want You.

People Become Attached To Their Burdens Sometimes More Than The Burdens Are Attached To Them.

A Great Social Reformer.

Woman's Happiness Begins With Her First Love And Ends About Then

What The World Calls Originality Is Only An Unaccustomed Method Of Tickling It.

The Way To Deal With Worldly People Is To Frighten Them By Repeating Their Scandalous Whisperings Aloud.

Affection Between Adults - If They Are Really Adult In Mind And Not Merely Grown Up Children - And Creatures So Relatively Selfish And Cruel As Children Necessarily Are Without Knowing It Or Meaning It, Cannot Be Called Natural.

The Degree Of Tolerance Attainable At Any Moment Depends On The Strain Under Which Society Is Maintaining Its Cohesion.

I Work As My Father Drank.

A Woman Whose Face Looked As If It Had Been Made Of Sugar And Someone Had Licked It.

Once The Divinity We Worshipped Made Itself Visible And Comprehensible, We Crucified It.

Get Out Of My Way; For I Won't Stop For You.

The Function Of Comedy Is To Dispelunconsciousness By Turning The Searchlight Of The Keenest Moral And Intellectual Analysisright On To It.

It Is One Of The Mysterious Ways Of Allah To Make Women Troublesome When He Makes Them Beautiful.

Even To This Day It Is Easier Than It Ought To Be For Me To Get A Rise Out Of An American By Telling Him Something About Himself Which Is Equally True About Every Human Being On The Face Of The Globe. He At Once Resents This As A Disparagement And An Assertion On My Part That People In Other Parts Of The Globe Are Not Like That, And Are Loftily Superior To Such Weaknesses.

Dancing Is A Perpendicular Expression Of A Horizontal Desire.

There Are Scores Of Thousands Of Human Insects Who Are Ready At A Moment's Notice To Reveal The Will Of God On Every Possible Subject

Woman Reduces Us All To The Common Denominator.

It Is The End Of Happiness And The Beginning Of Peace.

Dogmatic Toleration Is Nonsense: I Would No More Tolerate The Teaching Of Calvinism To Children If I Had Power To Persecute It Than The British Raj Tolerated Suttee In India. Every Civilized Authority Must Draw A Line Between The Tolerable And The Intolerable.

That Older And Greater Church To Which I Belong: The Church Where The Oftener You Laugh The Better, Because By Laughter Only Can You Destroy Evil Without Malice

Few People Think More Than Two Or Three Times A Year; I Have Made An International Reputation For Myself By Thinking Once Or Twice A Week.

I Also Made It Quite Clear That Socialism Means Equality Of Income Or Nothing, And That Under Socialism You Would Not Be Allowed To Be Poor. You Would Be Forcibly Feed, Clothed, Lodged, Taught, And Employed Whether You Like It Or Not. If It Were Discovered That You Had Not Character Enough To Be Worth All This Trouble, You Might Possibly Be Executed In A Kindly Manner; But Whilst You Were Permitted To Live You Would Have To Live Well.

Very Nice Sort Of Place, Oxford, I Should Think, For People That Like That Sort Of Place. They Teach You To Be A Gentleman There. In The Polytechnic They Teach You To Be An Engineer Or Such Like. See?

No Child Should Be Brought Up To Suppose That Its Food And Clothes Come Down From Heaven Or Are Miraculously Conjured From Empty Space By Papa. Loathsome As We Have Made The Idea Of Duty (like The Idea Of Work) We Must Habituate Children To A Sense Of Repayable Obligation To The Community For What They Consume And Enjoy, And Inculcate The Repayment As A Point Of Honor.

A Man Without An Address Is A Vagabond; A Man With Two Addresses Is A Libertine.

A Critic Is One Who Leaves No Turn Unstoned.

You Cannot Learn To Skate Without Making Yourself Ridiculous - The Ice Of Life Is Slippery.

Assassination On The Scaffold Is The Worst Form Of Assassination.

Every Fool Believes What His Teachers Tell Him, And Calls His Credulity Science Or Morality As Confidently As His Father Called It Divine Revelation.

Whether You Think Jesus Was God Or Not, You Must Admit He Was A First-rate Political Economist.

The Fact That A Believer Is Happier Than A Skeptic Is No More To The Point Than The Fact That A Drunken Man Is Happier Than A Sober One.

In Your Dread Of Dictators You Established A State Of Society In Which Every Ward Boss Is A Dictator, Every Private Employer A Dictator, Every Financier A Dictator, All With The Livelihood Of The Workers At His Mercy, And No Public Responsibility.

The Single Biggest Problem In Communication Is The Illusion That It Has Taken Place.

Funny Inspirational

Orchestras Only Need To Be Sworn At, And A German Is Consequently At An Advantage With Them, As English Profanity, Except In America, Has Not Gone Beyond A Limited Technology Of Perdition.

If Parents Would Only Realize How They Bore Their Children.

Any Sort Of Plain Speaking Is Better Than The Nauseous Sham Good Fellowship Our Democratic Public Men Get Up For Shop Use.

The Real Moment Of Success Is Not The Moment Apparent To The Crowd.

Both Optimists And Pessimists Contribute To Society. The Optimist Invents The Aeroplane, The Pessimist The Parachute.

I Learned Long Ago, Never To Wrestle With A Pig. You Get Dirty, And Besides, The Pig Likes It.

The Secret Of Being Miserable Is To Have Leisure To Bother About Whether You Are Happy Or Not. The Cure For It Is Occupation, Because Occupation Means Pre-occupation; And The Pre-occupied Person Is Neither Happy Nor Unhappy, But Simply Alive And Active. That Is Why It Is Necessary To Happiness That One Should Be Tired.

To Be A Champion You Must Live Like One.

Journalists Are Too Poorly Paid In This Country To Know Anything That Is Fit For Publication.

I Sold Flowers. I Didn't Sell Myself. Now You've Made A Lady Of Me I'm Not Fit To Sell Anything Else.

When Men Die Of Disease They Are Said To Die From Natural Causes. When They Recover (and Mostly They Do) The Doctor Gets The Credit Of Curing Them.

Like Fingerprints, All Marriages Are Different.

Any Man Who Is Not A Communist At The Age Of Twenty Is A Fool. Any Man Who Is Still A Communist At The Age Of Thirty Is An Even Bigger Fool.

Though The Life Force Supplies Us With Its Own Purpose, It Has No Other Brains To Work With Than Those It Has Painfully And Imperfectly Evolved In Our Heads.

The Ability To Make Witty Observations Is Commonly Refered To As "cynism" By People Who Lack It.

There Are Two Things Necessary To Salvation.... Money And Gunpowder.

My Schooling Did Me A Great Deal Of Harm And No Good Whatever; It Was Simply Dragging A Child's Soul Through The Dirt.

Principles Without Programs Are Platitudes.

The Real Brahms Is Nothing More Than A Sentimental Voluptuary

The Only Way For A Woman To Provide For Herself Decently Is For Her To Be Good To Some Man That Can Afford To Be Good To Her.

Style Is Effectiveness Of Assertion.

I Am Highly Susceptible To The Force Of All Truly Religious Music, Especially To The Music Of My Own Church, The Church Of Shelley, Michelangelo, And Beethoven.

The Hand Of The Painter Is Incurably Mechanical: His Technique Is Incurably Artificial... The Camera... Is So Utterly Unmechanical.

Hate Is The Revenge Of A Coward Intimidated.

Patriotism Is A Word Which Always Commemorates A Robbery.

I Have Prophesied About The Faith Of Muhammad That It Would Be Acceptable To The Europe Of Tomorrow As It Is Beginning To Be Acceptable To The Europe Of Today. ... I Believe That If A Man Like Him Were To Assume The Dictatorship Of The Modern World He Would Succeed In Solving Its Problems In A Way That Would Bring It The Much-needed Peace And Happiness.

If More Than Ten Percent Of The Public Likes A Painting, It Should Be Burned.

The Cinema Is Going To Form The Mind Of England. The National Conscience, The National Ideals And Tests Of Conduct, Will Be Those Of The Film.

I Sing, Not Arms And The Hero, But The Philosophic Man: He Who Seeks In Contemplation To Discover The Inner Will Of The World, Ininvention To Discover The Means Of Fulfilling That Will, And In Action To Do That Will By The So-discovered Means.

I Have Never Admitted The Right Of An Elderly Author To Alter The Work Of A Young Author, Even When The Young Author Happens To Be His Former Self.

People Get Tired Of Everything, And Of Nothing Sooner Than Of What They Most Like.

You Use A Glass Mirror To See Your Face; You Use Works Of Art To See Your Soul.

I Want To Be Thoroughly Used Up When I Die, For The Harder I Work The More I Live. I Rejoice In Life For Its Own Sake.

Positive Thinking

A Pessimist Is A Man Who Thinks Everybody Is As Nasty As Himself, And Hates Them For It.

When A Thing Is Funny, Search It Carefully For A Hidden Truth.

I Love Little Children Too But I Don't Cut Off Their Heads And Stick Them In Vases.

Hell Is Full Of Musical Amateurs.

If You Eliminate Smoking And Gambling, You Will Be Amazed To Find That Almost All An Englishman's Pleasures Can Be, And Mostly Are, Shared By His Dog.

I Was A Freethinker Before I Knew How To Think.

When A Prisoner Sees The Door Of His Dungeon Open, He Dashes For It Without Stopping To Think Where He Shall Get His Dinner Outside.

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