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Sometimes I Get Scared That I’m Going To Enter A Web Address Into Twitter Thinking It Was My Browser. That Would Be Bad.

-John Mayer

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Sometimes I Get Scared

John Mayer

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Sometimes I Get Scared That I’m Going To Enter A Web Address Into Twitter Thinking It Was My Browser. That Would Be Bad.

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It's Better To Say Too Much, Than Never To Say What You Need To Say Again.

May This Be The Year That Things Go Your Way Most Of The Time, And When They Don't, May You Have Great Friends To Lean On.

My Hits Are Not Hits.

They Read All The Books, But They Can't Find The Answers.

Most Times When You Try To Be All Things To All People, You End Up Being Nothing.

There's So Many Inspiring People Out There.

It's So Interesting How Success Hits People And How They React To It.

I Can't Stress Enough How Important It Is To Write Bad Songs. There's A Lot Of People Who Don't Want To Finish Songs Because They Don't Think They're Any Good. Well They're Not Good Enough. Write It! I Want You To Write Me The Worst Songs You Could Possible Write Me Because You Won't Write Bad Songs. You're Thinking They're Bad So You Don't Have To Finish It. That's What I Really Think It Is. Well It's All Right. Well, How Do You Know? It's Not Done!

You Gotta Be Able To Explain Things To Yourself When The Lights Go Off And You Get In The Bed. You Gotta Deal With You At The End Of The Day.

The End Of The Day

No Matter What I Do, I'm Going To Earn It.

Never, Ever Underestimate The Power Of 'id Like That.

Nothing Feels Worse Than Having To Break The Stage Down Before The Performance, And I Mean Nothing.

You Know I Used To Be The Back Porch Poet With My Book Of Lines, Always Hoping Knowing All The Time, I'm Probably Never Gonna Find The Perfect Rhyme. . .for Heavier Things

This Is Not To Say, There Never Comes A Day I'll Take My Chances And Start Again. And When I Look Behind On All My Younger Times, I'll Have To Thank The Wrongs That Led Me To A Love So Strong.

I'm Willing To Make Compromises Based On Someone I Think Is The One, But I Think It's Psychologically Important To People When They're Famous To Be The Only Famous Person They Know.

I'm Trying Everything I Can Not To Be Jaded 'cause I Don't Like Jaded Musicians.

Trying Everything

Atlanta's My Musical Home. It Really Was The Place Where I Really Came Alive.

I Have Masturbated Myself Out Of Serious Problems In My Life.

There's A Certain Lack Of Gimmickry To What I Do That Makes People In England Go: 'where's The Thing?

So Scared Of Getting Older I'm Only Good At Being Young So I Play The Numbers Game To Find A Way To Say That Life Has Just Begun.

You Get To A Certain Age Where You Prepare Yourself For Happiness. Sometimes You Never Remember To Actually Get Happy.

I'm Not Deluded Enough To Think That Everyone Who Knows My Name Is A Listener. You Know, I Hope That Part Of That Interest - Part Of That Public Interest - Has To Do With Me Still Making Records That People Like.

I Don't Jerk Off Because I'm Horny. I'm Sort Of Half-chick. It's Like District 9. I Can Fire Alien Weapons. I Can Insert A Tampon. No, I Do It Because I Want To Take A Brain Bath. It's Like A Hot Whirlpool For My Brain, In A Brain Space That Is 100 Percent Agreeable With Itself.

High School Is Like A Spork: It's A Crappy Spoon And A Crappy Fork, So In The End It's Just Plain Useless.

The Saddest Kind Of Sad Is The Sad That Tries Not To Be Sad. You Know, When Sad Tries To Bite Its Lip And Not Cry, And Smile And Say, "no I'm Happy For You"? Thats When It's Really Sad.

Disappointment Has A Name, It's Heartbreak

The Night I Was Recognized For 'daughters' At The Grammys Was The Night This Record Started. I Knew I Had Bought The Time To Learn Everything I Needed Before I Started This One. 'continuum' Is Not A Shot In The Dark, It's Not A Guesstimation.

I Am Invincible, As Long As I'm Alive.

When You're Dreaming With A Broken Heart, The Waking Up Is The Hardest Part. You Roll Outta Bed And Down On Your Knees And For A Moment You Can Hardly Breathe.

I Know The Heart Of Life Is Good.

I Feel Strikingly Domestic. We're In Our Own World With Two Busses And Trucks.

Numb Is The New Deep.

I Need Some Kind Of Emotional Stake In It To Write My Lyrics, Assuming That Place. It Might Just Be An Emotion I Understand But Am Not Currently Experiencing Necessarily.

You Should Have A Picture Of Yourself As A Kid In Your Home So That You Remember Where You Came From.

I've Always Said I've Got The Coolest Fans, And I Brag About You Like Grandchildren When I Talk To Other Artists.

I Hate Being The Heartbreaker. Hate It. If I Date Somebody And It Doesn't Work Out, It's Another Nightmare For Me.

There's A Real Self-serving Element To Hip-hop That Threatens Its Life Span.

You Look So Good It Hurts Sometimes.

Sometimes I Wish That I Was A Bong Hit, You'd Let Me In And You Would Love Every Minute.

I Want To Be The First Guy From My Generation Who Doesn't Just Represent One Record But The Promise Of A Lot Of Them.

The Emotionally Intelligent Person Is Skilled In Four Areas: Identifying Emotions, Using Emotions, Understanding Emotions, And Regulating Emotions.

What I've Learned In My Life, It's A Very Interesting Social Study For Me, To Go Back And Forth Between Being The Guy At Home And Being The Guy On The Road And Being The Guy In Studio And Being The Guy In The Interview. The Environment Around You Has So Much To Do With Your Character, And When I'm Home, My Character Really Changes Quite A Bit.

I'm The Only Person I Know Who's Got A Bunch Of Money.

Half Of My Heart's Got A Real Good Imagination, Half Of My Heart's Got You. . .half Of My Hearts Got A Right Mind To Tell You That Half Of My Heart Won't Do.

Someday I'll Fly Someday I'll Soar Someday I'll Be So Damn Much More Cause I'm Bigger Than My Body Gives Me Credit For

Look, Demanding Somebody Do Anything In This Day And Age Is Not Going To Fly.

If You Had Started Doing Anything Two Weeks Ago, By Today You Would Have Been Two Weeks Better At It.

Someday, Everything Will Make Perfect Sense. So For Now, Laugh At The Confusion, Smile Through The Tears, Be Strong And Keep Reminding Your Self That Everything Happens For A Reason.

If I Wake Up In The Morning And I Don't Want To Get You A Coffee Or If I Don't See You For A Week And I Don't Want To Go Figure Out Something To Fedex You, Then We've Got A Problem. You Can Fake The Words I Miss You, But You Can't Fake Getting Someone A Book.

In A Time When Everything Can Be Next Day And Ordered And Put On Credit And Paid For, Music To Me Is Promise, All Promise, Very Little Realization. It's The Promise Of Walking Into A Room With A Guitar And Not Being Sure You Will Leave With An Idea That Will Take, Not Being Sure It Won't Slip Away From You.

You Make A Choice In Your Life, And It Affects Your Life In All The Ways, Good And Bad.

I'm Not An Icon. Not Even In America.

Everybody Enjoys Arguing About The Current State Of Music Because It Feels As If You Are Talking About Something Incredibly Important, Yet It Requires Little Understanding Of The Subject Matter At Hand. It's Like World Politics Meets The Pink Questions In Trivial Pursuit. Points Are Made But Nothing Gets Accomplished.

Life Is Like A Box Of Crayons. Most People Are The 8-color Boxes, But What You're Really Looking For Are The 64-color Boxes With The Sharpeners On The Back. I Fancy Myself To Be A 64-color Box, Though I've Got A Few Missing.

Playing Music To Me Is As Close To Having Super Powers As You Can Have.

I Am Who I Am Because Of Dave Matthews Band

I Feel My Shows Are Like A Late-night Talk Show That We Settle Down And Do Every Night.

Who I Am As A Guitarist Is Defined By My Failure To Become Jimi Hendrix.

Sometimes I Get So Bold And I'm So Confident About What I'm Doing That I Actually Try To Be More Of A Dork Because It's A Really Liberating Feeling To Experience What It's Like To Not Care.

If You're Good, And You Know You're Good, And You Know You're Better Than Those People Getting Paid To Do It, You Still Have To Have An Open Ear….nobody's Music Is The Enemy Of Your Music…the Idea That Someone Else Has Made It When They Shouldn't Have Made It Is Toxic Thinking.

Everybody Is Just A Stranger, But That's The Danger In Going My Own Way.

I Wanna Run Through The Halls Of My High School, I Wanna Scream At The Top Of My Lungs. I Just Found Out There's No Such Thing As The Real World, Just A Lie You've Got To Rise Above.

I Look Away At Car Crashes, And I Know People Who Look Away At Car Crashes, Because It Makes Us Uncomfortable To Watch Other People In Pain.

Not Worrying Is A Skill. It's A Skill Not Breaking Down Every Single Moment.

People Are Really Concerned With What Other People Are Saying About Them.

I'd Like To Think The Best Of Me Was Still Hiding Up In My Sleeve.

I Hope That What It Comes Down To At The End Of The Day Is That People Believe That I Believe What I'm Singing. It Comes Down To Being Believable. You Don't Have To Be Likeable; Generally, Though, I Think I Am.

Yeah, Under The Table And Dreaming Shaped The Way That I Think About Writing Songs.

I'm Pretty Good At Taking Accountability Now, And I Never Did Anything To Deserve That. It Was A Really Lousy Thing For Her To Do.

Very Few Things In Life Are Worthy Of The Kind Of Emotional Distress We Put Ourselves Through.

They Say Stay In The Lines, But There's Always Something Better On The Other Side.

Something Better

When You're Just Open But Not Honest, Then You Start Free-associating Garbage.

Ladies, If You Want To Know The Way To My Heart... Good Spelling And Good Grammar, Good Punctuation, Capitalize Only Where You Are Supposed To Capitalize, It's Done.

There Are People In The World Who Have The Power To Change Our Values.

Power To Change

I Am Beginning To Know What It Feels Like To Be A Woman. To Have People Looking At You All The Time. And I'm Sorry Ladies, I Had No Idea! But People Are Looking At Me All The Time. It's Like I Have Musical Boobies!

Anybody Who Tells You To Have A Fallback Plan Are People Who Had A Fallback Plan, Didn’t Follow Their Dreams, And Don’t Want You To Either.

I Scientifically Engineer My Music To Be As Accessible As Possible.

I Think That One Of The Greatest Connections And Attractions You Can Have With Somebody, Is Understanding Somebody.

We're Supposed To Lose Our Friends To Time, At An Age When We're Ready To Agree To The Terms Of Having Lived A Long Life. Not Now.

If You Get Half A Million, At A Certain Stage You Probably Will Get 4 Million People, If They Are Able To Hear It. The Touring Thing Is Unbelievable. It Really Is Amazing From What We Did The Last Tour Even To What We Are Doing Now.

I Like Giving People Something They Don't Want To Miss The Next Time. It's A Show With Little Twists And Turns And Curves. It Has Me Being Silly And Stupid And Compassionate And Completely Deep.

It's Very Liberating When You Finally Realize It's Impossible To Make Everyone Like You.

It’s My Failure To Sound Like My Heroes That’s Allowed Me To Sound Like Myself.

Pain Throws Your Heart To The Ground Love Turns The Whole Thing Around Fear Is A Friend Who's Misunderstood But I Know The Heart Of Life Is Good

I Can't Even Explain To You How Terrible That Feels, That I Equate Dating A Woman With Punishment, Shame, Guilt, Disappointment, Reproach, Reprimand, Persecution. It's A Nightmare.

I'm A Mess Of Unfinished Thoughts.

I've Never Walked Into A Restaurant, Asked For A Table And Been Told, 'we're Full.'

Every Song I Put On A Record Could Be A Single And I Just Pack My Bags For It... And The Minute It Takes Off, I'm Not Gonna Be Home For A While.

Trying To Impress My Mother With Words Was One Of My Favourite Pursuits.

I Get Recognized Somewhere In Between Like Local Meteorologist And National Meteorologist.

When You Trust Your Television What You Get Is What You Got Cause When They Own The Information, Oh They Can Bend It All They Want.

Stop Falling In Love With Everything That Lets You Down, Even If Your Hands Are Shaking And Your Faith Is Broken, Even As The Eyes Are Closing, Do It With A Heart Wide Open. Say What You Need To Say.

Falling In Love

I've Realized You Can Use A Fork As A Spoon If You Use It Rapidly Enough.

Might Be A Quarter Life Crisis, Just Disturbin' In My Soul.

People Want To See Musicians Sing Things That Come From Their Own Mind And Own Heart In Real Time, Responding To The Moment For Them.

I Can't Describe It In Words, But I Can See It In My Head, Its Color, Its Light, Its Shapes, And I've Managed To Synthesize My Love For Myself By Way Of Many Different Reasonings And Processes, And I've Been Able To Really Synthesize My Own Satisfaction And Things That Do It For Me. They've Usually Been Self-taught, Self-instructed, Self-refined. So To Be With Anybody Else Has To Somewhat Lie In That Comfort Zone I've Created With Myself So Well.

And I Start Sleeping And Dreaming And I Think I'll Dream About You, All Through The Night.

I've Never Done Anything Because I Thought It Would Look Cool.

I Mean There Are So Many Different Colors Of Life, Of Feeling, Of Articulation... So When I Meet Someone Who's An 8-color Type... I'm Like, 'hey Girl, Magenta!' And She's Like, 'oh, You Mean Purple!' And She Goes Off On Her Purple Thing, And I'm Like, 'no - I Want Magenta!'

My Fear Is That I Go Up To The Girl Of My Dreams And Say 'i'm Sorry, But I've Got To Say Hello To You,' And She Slides The Stool Back And Gets Up And Walks Away, Saying, 'not For Me, Bub. I Don't Want Anything To Do With You.'

Love Is Like Grass. If You Fall On It, It May Leave A Stain And Some Temporary Pain. But You'll Get Over The Pain, It Will Eventually Stop Hurting. Now Maybe The Stain Ruined Your Favourite Pair Of Jeans, Or Maybe It Was Nothing Special That Was Ruined, But Either Way The Stain Remains There. And With Time, It Will Begin To Fade, But It Will Always Be There, A Permanent Reminder That You, Too, Once Fell.

I Went To My Library, Right? And I Started To Research The Bill Of Rights And I Did Not Technically Find Anything That Said All Americans Shall Eat Shrimp With Whoever They Like. But, I Found Some Things That Are Close Enough To Infer That I Am Within My Legal Rights To Enjoy Seafood With Whomever I Choose.

I've Figured Out My Learning Curve. I Can Look At Something And Somehow Know Exactly How Long It Will Take For Me To Learn It.

I Just Wish They'd Put A New Word In The Dictionary Bigger Than Love Because Love Just Doesn't Describe What I Feel.

She's Perfect, So Flawless, I'm Not Impressed.

If You Never Stop When You Wave Goodbye You Just Might Find, If You Give It Time, You Will Wave Hello Again.

I Am Tempted To Keep The Car In Drive, And Leave It All Behind...

You Cannot Avoid War In Life, You Cannot Avoid The Fear Of Terrorism, You Cannot Avoid Those Things Now, They Are A Part Of Everyday Demeanor.

I'm Not Really Good At Keeping My Own Secrets. I Can Keep Other People's Secrets Pretty Well. Unless They're Really Good And People Deserve To Hear Them. And I'll Disseminate The Information Accordingly.

I'm A Good Music Provider, And I'm Fine With That. I'm A Quality Music Manufacturer.

I Don't Write Songs In Order To Stick It To My Exes. I Don't Release Underground Dis Tracks.

I Remember Playing The Guitar Through The Amplifier Facing Out The Window Of My House Onto The Street In The Summer Time - That Was Social Media In 1992.

Fathers Be Good To Your Daughters, Daughters Will Love Like You Do. Girls Become Lovers, Who Turn Into Mothers, So Mothers Be Good To Your Daughters, Too.

I May Have Taken Someone Through The Wringer Psychologically, But I've Never Been Sinister.

I'll Never Let Your Head Hit The Bed Without My Hand Behind It.

I Quit The Media Game. I'm Out. I'm Done.

I Am Not In 'us Weekly.' I'd Have To Be Going Out With Someone Who Is In There To Be In There Myself.

How Come Everything I Need Always Comes With Batteries?

Unanswered Questions

Fear Is A Friend Who's Misunderstood

Sometimes I Wish That I Was The Weather, You'd Bring Me Up In Conversation Forever. And When It Rained, I'd Be The Talk Of The Day.

If You Told Me I Was Going To Live To 240, I Would Take 10 Years Off And Try And Act. I Don't Have That Kind Of Time, So I'd Much Rather Stick To Playing Guitar.

By The Time I Recognize This Moment, This Moment Will Be Gone. . . But I Will Bend The Light, Pretend That It Somehow Lingered On

What I Enjoy About The Live Experience Is Getting Onstage, Being Handed A Guitar That Is In Tune, Taking It Off Mute, Knowing That The Very Moment I Want To Play A Note, I Can Play It. People Are Waiting On Me And I'm Waiting On Me, And I Have No Idea What I'm Going To Play. That's The Biggest Joy In Life.

The Tweets Are Getting Shorter, But The Songs Are Still 4 Minutes Long. You're Coming Up With 140-character Zingers, And The Song Is Still 4 Minutes Long…i Realized About A Year Ago That I Couldn't Have A Complete Thought Anymore. And I Was A Tweetaholic. I Had Four Million Twitter Followers, And I Was Always Writing On It. And I Stopped Using Twitter As An Outlet And I Started Using Twitter As The Instrument To Riff On, And It Started To Make My Mind Smaller And Smaller And Smaller. And I Couldn't Write A Song.

I Have These Accidents, These Mistakes, These Self-inflicted Wounds, And Then I Tear My Head To Shreds About It For Days.

In The Quest To Be Clever, I Completely Forgot About The People That I Love And That Love Me.

I Was Smart Enough To Know It Would Probably Make Me A Salable Item For The Paparazzi. I Knew I'd Have To Move To A Home That Had A Gate. But That Pearl Of Possibility That Lives In Your Heart When You Meet Somebody You Want To Know More About Has Such A Different Molecular Density Than Everything Else That You Have To Pursue It.

I Mean, I’m Quite Happy. I’m Happy In All Aspects Of My Life. I'm Very Happy In All Aspects Of My Life.

My Life's A Sequel To A Movie Where The Actors' Names Have Changed.

I Love You More Than Songs Can Say, But I Can't Keep Running After Yesterday.

I'm Singing What I Want To Sing Based On The Emotion Of What That Day Feels Like. That's What Comes Out Of My Mouth And Guitar. That Impacts People. They Know Anything Can Happen.

When You Do An Interview With Me, You're Talking To A Cheap Imitation Of The Person That I Really Am. There's No Magic In My Words, It's Just Me Talking.

I Have The Obsessiveness Of Someone Who's A Sober, Recovering Addict Displacing His Addiction. Except I Never Had The Addiction.

Sometimes It Feels Like My Life Is Just One Long Day.

Whenever They Say It Can’t Be Done, Remind Them That They Make A Jellybean That Tastes Exactly Like Popcorn.

The Outcome Of A Still Veracitless Life. Am I Livin' It Right?

Unanswered Questions

I Have Male Fans, But I'm Persuading Them To Become Female!

I'm Interested In Living More Of A Life That's Invisible To Everybody And More Vibrant To A Fewer People That Are In My Life.

I've Never Been A Bad Boy.

I Came From The Last Couple Of Years In A Generation Where We Didn't Have A Computer Around So We Didn't Waste As Much Time On The Internet As We Do Now So I Had Large Chuncks Of Time Which To Devote To Doing Something.

Maybe Someday You Can Accuse Somebody Of Being A Poseur By Selling Out And Playing Blues Music, But That's Just Not Going To Happen In My Lifetime.

God Only Knows How Much I'd Love You If You Let Me, But I Can't Break Through At All.

Have You Ever Loved Somebody, Loved Her Completely, But Had To End The Relationship For Life Reasons?

It's Almost Charity Work, What People Have Done, Turning Other People On To My Music.

So Scared Of Getting Older, I'm Only Good At Being Young.

Don't Be Scared To Walk Alone. Don't Be Scared To Like It.

Traveling Alone

Welcome To The Real World, She Said To Me. Condescendingly. Take A Seat. Take Your Life. Plot It Out In Black And White.

Black And White

Numb Is The New Deep, Done With The Old Me, And Talk Is The Same Cheap It's Been.

Who Says I Can't Be Free From All Of The Things That I Used To Be?

I Believe That My Life's Gonna See The Love I Give Returned To Me.

Today I Finally Overcame Tryin’ To Fit The World Inside A Picture Frame.

Waiting On The World To Change.

We Just Feel Like We Don't Have The Means, To Rise Above And Beat It. So We Keep Waiting, Waiting On The World To Change...

Sometimes I Get Scared That I’m Going To Enter A Web Address Into Twitter Thinking It Was My Browser. That Would Be Bad.

I Need To Learn How To Start Saying No. Like When Someone Says ‘please Stop Choking Me.’

Friends, Lovers, Or Nothing, We Can Really Only Ever Be One.

I Was Very Successful From A Very Early Age, And I Want To Keep It.

Anybody Who's Made It Will Tell You, You Can Make It. Anyone Who Hasn't Made It Will Tell You, You Can't

I Believe In Blues, And I Believe That It's Been Misrepresented.

When Autumn Comes, It Doesn't Ask. It Just Walks In, Where It Left You Last. And You Never Know, When It Starts; Until There's Fog Inside The Glass Around Your Summer Heart.

Sometimes You Tell Someone To Never Call You Again; And Then The Phone Rings And You Hope It's Them - It's The Most Twisted Logic Of All Time.

The Minute Hand Moves Faster Than You Think It Does.

The Biggest Mistake I Made And What Cost Me A Lot Of Enjoyment In My Life, Was Assuming That Everybody Cared. They Don’t.

I Find Myself In Situations That I Know Would Be Unbelievable Pictures And I Have To Gauge, Is This Worth Taking The Camera Out? Am I Gonna Lose The Moment? Am I Gonna Get A Dirty Look From Sting?

Songs Can Be Trojan Horses, Taking Charged Ideas And Sneaking Past The Ego's Defenses And Into The Open Mind.

A Man's Got Two Shots For Jewelry: A Wedding Ring And A Watch. The Watch Is A Lot Easier To Get On And Off Than A Wedding Ring.

I'm Not As Surprised In Going From Playing 1,000 Seats To 4,000 Seats As I Was From 100 To 500 Seats.

I Knew What I Wanted To Do When I Was 13 And I Had To Go Through Four Years Of High School To Get Out. That's A Blessing, Because I Never Had To Lay On My Bed Staring Up At The Ceiling Going, 'what Am I Going To Do With My Life?'

Half Of My Heart’s Got A Grip On The Situation, Half Of My Heart Takes Time.

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