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Recurrent Floods Of Sadness And Anger Gradually Wash Away The Rubble Of The Defunct Relationship, Leaving Only The Bits Of Treasure: The Remembered Moments Of Real Communion, A New Understanding Of Your Own Mistakes, A Clear Picture Of The Dysfunctions You Will Never Tolerate Again.

-Martha Beck

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Recurrent Floods Of Sadness

Martha Beck

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Recurrent Floods Of Sadness And Anger Gradually Wash Away The Rubble Of The Defunct Relationship, Leaving Only The Bits Of Treasure: The Remembered Moments Of Real Communion, A New Understanding Of Your Own Mistakes, A Clear Picture Of The Dysfunctions You Will Never Tolerate Again.

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Don't Let Your Life Revolve Around Whatever You're Trying Not To Do Or Feel. Live To Experience, Not To Avoid.

Remember, Intimacy Increases With Honesty. Share Less To Keep People Away And More To Draw Them Closer.

Learning To Spot Narcissists And Deal With Their Destructive Behavior Can Save You The World Of Hurt That Awaits Anyone Who Mistakes The Near Enemy For A Friend.

If Anything Is Worth Doing, It Is Worth Doing It Badly.

Humans Only Really Learn From Each Other By Storytelling. We Didn't Evolve To Memorize Things. We Evolved To Hear Each Other's Stories And Feel Them In Our Heart. Your Life Is The Most Powerful Story You Can Tell.

No One Else Can Take Risks For Us, Or Face Our Losses On Our Behalf, Or Give Us Self-esteem. No One Can Spare Us From Life's Slings And Arrows, And When Death Comes, We Meet It Alone.

Recurrent Floods Of Sadness And Anger Gradually Wash Away The Rubble Of The Defunct Relationship, Leaving Only The Bits Of Treasure: The Remembered Moments Of Real Communion, A New Understanding Of Your Own Mistakes, A Clear Picture Of The Dysfunctions You Will Never Tolerate Again.

Allowing Children To Show Their Guilt, Show Their Grief, Show Their Anger, Takes The Sting Out Of The Situation.

To Live A Life That Is Wrong For You Is A Form Of Dying. There Are People Who Have Lives That Look Perfect. They Try To Be Happy, They Believe They Should Be Happy, They Are Trying To Like It, But If It's Off Course From Their North Star, They Aren't Satisfied.

This Is The Part Of Us That Makes Our Brief, Improbable Little Lives Worth Living: The Ability To Reach Through Our Own Isolation And Find Strength, And Comfort, And Warmth For And In Each Other. This Is What Human Beings Do. This Is What We Live For, The Way Horses Live To Run.

By The End Of Your Incredibly Arduous, Disappointing, Stressful Journey, You Will Be Your True Self, In A Place Where You Belong, With Friends Who Truly Understand You And Bring All Sorts Of Opportunities Your Way.

No Matter How Difficult And Painful It May Be, Nothing Sounds As Good To The Soul As The Truth.

Your Relationship Is Not Supposed To Be Perfect All The Time, Your Business Is Not Supposed To Do Well All The Time, Your Soufflés Are Not Supposed To Raise Perfectly All The Time. Everything Is Designed To Go Wrong So That You Can Gain The Skills Of Rediscovering Your Tracks, Even In Difficult Or Frightening Circumstances. Especially In Difficult And Frightening Circumstances.

Here Is The Crux Of The Matter, The Distilled Essence, The Only Thing You Need To Remember: When Considering Whether To Say Yes Or No, You Must Choose The Response That Feels Like Freedom. Period.

The End Goal Of All Of This Striving Is To Live Joyfully, And That There Are Often More Direct Ways Of Achieving This Than Conforming To Rigid Standards Set By Social Custom.

Silence Comes In Two Varieties: One That Nourishes And Comforts; Another That Chokes, Smothers, And Isolates. Solitary Confinement Is The Worst Kind Of Imprisonment We Can Inflict On Fellow Humans, And If You Are Forced To Keep Silent About Some Dark Secret, You Live In Solitary Confinement. Without The Bridge Of Communication Connecting You To Other Human Beings, You Can’t Share Your Burdens, Can’t Receive Comfort, Can’t Confirm That You Still Belong. Silence Is The Abyss That Separates You From Hope.

Make Stuff Up. Anyone Who Ever Did Something New Or Interesting Was Making It Up As They Went Along.

I've Developed The Habit Of Mentally Listing Things That Make Me Optimistic About The Future. I Do It Every Day.

Trying To Motivate Yourself With Fear Is Like Screaming At A Child, “do Something, Dammit!” You’ll Either Freeze Up Or Act In Counterproducti Ve Ways. Fear Widens The Knowing-doing Gap. Don’t Use It.

People Don’t Cry When They Lose Their Hope. They Cry When They Get It Back.

If You Begin To Face Your Fears, Something Bittersweet Is Going To Happen To You: You'll Grow Up.

If You'd Rather Live Surrounded By Pristine Objects Than By The Traces Of Happy Memories, Stay Focused On Tangible Things. Otherwise, Stop Fixating On Stuff You Can Touch And Start Caring About Stuff That Touches You.

The Average Adult Laughs 15 Times A Day; The Average Child, More Than 400 Times.

To Know What That True Self Is Without Social Pressure Is To Know Your True Nature.

Social Pressure

When You Do The Thing You Fear, The Thing Loses Its Power To Scare.

Most Of Our Stress And Suffering Come Not From Events, But From Our Thoughts. Reframe From Negative Thoughts, And Stress Subsides.

I Practice Staying Calm All The Time, Beginning With Situations That Aren't Tense.

I Really Do Think That Any Deep Crisis Is An Opportunity To Make Your Life Extraordinary In Some Way.

All Religious Leaders And Spiritual Teachers Emphasize Finding A Place Within Us That Is True. People Who Obsessively Follow These Leaders Instead Of Their Own Purpose Attach To The Spiritual Leader And Become Fanatical And Controlling. That's Why Jesus Tried To Tell His Followers Not To Get Attached To Outward Form.

Rest Until You Feel Like Playing, Then Play Until You Feel Like Resting, Period. Never Do Anything Else.

Every Instance Of Heartbreak Can Teach Us Powerful Lessons About Creating The Kind Of Love We Really Want.

Learning To Quit While You're Not Ahead, When The Dull Ooze Of Depression Tells You Things Are Not Going To Get Any Better, Is One Of The Best Financial And Life Skills You Can Master.

Caring For Your Inner Child Has A Powerful And Surprisingly Quick Result: Do It And The Child Heals.

Many Of Us Assume That We Have To Do Things A Certain Way: Ignore Passion In Favor Of Safer Bets, Act Stoic Amid Inner Turmoil, Run On An Upward Trajectory Of Success And Money Acquisition At Any Emotional Cost. But These Are Not Rules.

Truth Itself Is Something You Live, Not Something You Think.

The Heart Is A Tender But Hardy Organ. Daring To Have A Wonderful Experience, Even Though You May Get Hurt, Is The Only Way You'll Realize Its Deepest Desires.

External Circumstances Do Not Create Feeling States. Feeling States Create External Circumstances.

In The Pursuit Of Knowledge, Every Day Something Is Added. In The Practice Of The Way, Every Day Something Is Dropped. Less And Less Do You Need To Force Things, Until Finally You Arrive At Non-action. When Nothing Is Done, Nothing Is Left Undone.

There's Tons Of Magic In The World, And It's All Science.

Magic In The World

The Power To Bring Me Out Of Solitude - Or To Push Me Back Into It - Had Never Belonged To Another Person. It Was Mine And Only Mine.

My Deep Belief Is That All Of Us Have The Same Lifelong Work: To Learn Honesty, Courage, And Love. To Learn, In Other Words, How To Be Our Best Selves.

During The Times We Think We’re Being “unproductive,” The Seeds Of New Worlds Are Germinating Within Us, And They Need Peace To Grow.

A Confession You Make Merely To Illuminate The Murky Corners Of Your Little Life May End Up Lighting The Path To Freedom For A Thousand Other Hearts.

Adults Under Threat Feel Like Children.

It's Only By Starting In A Place Of Peace That We Find Our Purpose And Power.

Places Of Peace

Though We Often See Life Troughs As The Universe's Conspiracy To Ruin Us, They're Actually Our Own True Nature Inviting Us To Lay Down Our Weary Heads.

If You're Miserable, Make A Choice. If You're Still Miserable, You Can Choose Again.

My Point Is That Perceptual Bias Can Affect Nut Jobs And Scientists Alike. If We Hold Too Rigidly To What We Think We Know, We Ignore Or Avoid Evidence Of Anything That Might Change Our Mind.

We Can’t Save Ourselves From Fear By Seeking Safety, Because Safety Always Means There’s Something To Be Safe From-in Other Words, Something To Fear. The Way Out Of Fear Isn’t Safety. It’s Freedom.

Creating Ways To Be Happy Is Your Life's Work, A Challenge That Won't End Until You Die.

If You're Living Completely On Your Own, Break Out Of Solitary Confinement. Seek To Understand Others, And Help Them Understand You

Sometimes A Psychic Tells You Something And It Feels Wrong And Others May Be Right On The Money. It's Your Choice About Whom To Trust, And Giving That Trust Is Something We Do Ourselves.

The Effect Of Emotional Venting Is To Sustain An Unsatisfactory Status Quo. Most People Think The Opposite, That Complaining Is Part Of An Effort To Change An Unsatisfying Situation. Nope. Complaining Lets Off Pressure So That We Neither Explode With Frustration Nor Feel Compelled To Take The Often Risky Steps Of Openly Opposing A Difficult Person Or Situation. Keeping Emotional Pressure Tolerably Low Doesn't Change Problematic Circumstances But Rather Perpetuates Them.

Any Moment You Spend Attacking Yourself Is A Moment Away From Your Higher Purpose And Your Power To Love. Don't Go There.

As Any Good Buddhist Will Tell You, The Only Way To Find Permanent Joy Is By Embracing The Fact That Nothing Is Permanent.

What Should You Do Now? Find A New Way. A Better Way. Your Way. The Unknown, Uncharted Path Through This Wild New World That Allows You---yourself, In Your Uniqueness--to Reclaim The Full Measure Of Your True Nature.

People Are So Afraid Of Authority Figures And Doctors Are Authority Figures.

What Laughter Is To Childhood, Sex Is To Adolescence.

Whoever Said That Love Is Blind Was Dead Wrong. Love Is The Only Thing On This Earth That Lets Us See Each Other With The Remotest Accuracy.

The Really Potent Part Of Love Is That It Allows You To Carry Around Beliefs About Yourself That Make You Feel Special, Desirable, Precious, Innately Good. Your Lover Couldn't Have Seen [these Qualities] In You, Even Temporarily, If They Weren't Part Of Your Essential Being.

Angels Come In Many Shapes And Sizes, And Most Of Them Are Not Invisible.

You Do Not Owe Anyone Your Time. When You Realize That, Others Will Respect Your Time Much More.

To Follow Your Life's Guidance, You May Have To Reassign Some Seemingly Important Things To 'unimportant.' If You Believe That Pleasing Your Horrible Boss Or Having A Spotless House Is A Higher Priority Than Playing With Your Children Or Sleeping Off The Flu, Be Prepared For A Long And Strenuous Battle Against Destiny. Also, Be Prepared To Lose.

Welcoming Imperfection Is The Way To Accomplish What Perfectionism Promises But Never Delivers. It Gives Us Our Best Performance And Genuine Acceptance In The Family Of Human -- And By That I Mean Imperfect -- Beings.

Most People Go Through Their Whole Lives," John Went On, "and Never Have One Miracle Happen To Them. You've Had Dozens And Dozens, And You Still Want More! It's Like God Gives You A Brownie, I Mean A Really Good Brownie, But You Can't Be Content With It. You Want The Whole Pan Of Brownies. Nobody Gets That.

Menders Of All Times And Places Have Taught That Silencing The Thoughts In Our Heads And Opening To The Experience Of The Body And Emotions Is The Basis Of All Healing. It's The Only Means By Which We Can Reclaim Our True Nature Or Feel The Subtle Cues Telling Us How To Find Our Way Through Life.

A Lot Of My Clients Say They Don't Deserve To Mope About Their Sad Little Memories While Children Are Starving In India. I Say That Just Because Your Broken Arm Isn't As Serious As Someone Else's Gut Wound, That Doesn't Mean Your Injury Isn't Excruciating Or Doesn't Require Attention. If You Want To Help The Indian Children, Or Make The World A Better Place In Any Other Way, You Have To Start By Becoming Whole Yourself.

I Have Come To Believe That There Are Infinite Passageways Out Of The Shadows, Infinite Vehicles To Transport Us Into The Light.

Peace Is More Than Just A Feeling. It's The Mental And Physical Frequency Where You'll Find All Your Real Power.

The Past Doesn’t Exist Except As A Memory, A Mental Story, And Though Past Events Aren’t Changeable, Your Stories About Them Are. You Can Act Now To Transform The Way You Tell The Story Of Your Past, Ultimately Making It A Stalwart Protector Of Your Future.

Given The Eclectic And Constantly Shifting Nature Of My Metaphysical Inclinations, I Will Probably Never Feel Certain Exactly What An Angel Is.

As Much Horror As We Have Always Created, We Are A Species That Keeps Moving Forward, Seeing New Sights In New Ways, And Enjoying The Journey.

You Will Know How To Stop Suffering As Soon As Suffering Ceases To Be Valuable. If You Are In Pain, You Are Being Led.

Having Fun Is Not A Diversion From A Successful Life; It Is The Pathway To It.

Children Who Assume Adult Responsibilities Feel Old When They're Young.

Standards Of Beauty Are Arbitrary. Body Shame Exists Only To The Extent That Our Physiques Don't Match Our Own Beliefs About How We Should Look.

To Be Really Productive, It's As Important To Rest When We're Tired As It Is To Work When We're Inspired.

We Virtually Never Feel Our Age, But Thinking That We Should Can Lead To Disaster.

Don't Expect The Future To Look Like The Past. Clear Away Expectations, And Let Yourself Picture A Wild, Grand New World.

Basic Human Contact - The Meeting Of Eyes, The Exchanging Of Words - Is To The Psyche What Oxygen Is To The Brain. If You're Feeling Abandoned By The World, Interact With Anyone You Can.

The Way We Do Anything Is The Way We Do Everything.

Learning To Let Go Of Expectations Is A Ticket To Peace. It Allows Us To Ride Over Every Crisis—small Or Large, Brother-in-law Or End-of-quarter Office Lockdown—like A Beach Ball On Water. The Next Time A Problem Arises In Your Life, Take A Deep Breath, Let Out A Sigh, And Replace The Thought Oh No! With The Thought Okay.

The Important Thing Is To Tell Yourself A Life Story In Which You, The Hero, Are Primarily A Problem Solver Rather Than A Helpless Victim. This Is Well Within Your Power, Whatever Fate Might Have Dealt You.

It Seems To Me At This Moment That Laughing Is A Serious Thing, That It Connects Us With Truth And Love And God.

Anger Elicits Anger, Fear Elicits Fear, No Matter How Well Meaning We May Be.

Most Unhappy People Need To Learn Just One Lesson: How To See Themselves Through The Lens Of Genuine Compassion, And Treat Themselves Accordingly.

When Making A Decision, Focus On What Feels "shackles Off" Versus "shackles On".

Fear Is The Raw Material From Which Courage Is Manufactured. Without It, We Wouldn't Even Know What It Means To Be Brave.

Feel About Yourself What You Would Have Others Feel About Themselves.

Don’t Hide Love. If You Feel It, Express It-not To Demand That Others Love You Back, But Simply To Live Outwardly The Best Of What You Feel Inwardly. The Worst That Can Happen To Your Heart Is Not Rejection By Another Person But Failure To Act On The Love You Feel.

If You See Failure As A Monster Stalking You, Or One That Has Already Ruined Your Life, Take Another Look. That Monster Can Become A Benevolent Teacher, Opening Your Mind To Successes You Cannot Now Imagine.

Connecting With The People Who Are Meant To Be Part Of Your Own North Star Is Much More Important Than Any Aspect Of Business. It's The Essence Of Happiness, The Full Realization Of Your Potential For Joy.

In The Moments I Get It Right, Every Step I Take Seems To Be Matched By A Universal Mystery, Which Obligingly, Incredibly, Creates What I Can't.

Judgments That Constrain Your Giving Are The Very Demons That Are Keeping You From Receiving.

Every Aspect Of Your Life, Whether It's A Task Or Relationship, Personal Or Professional, Will Be Based On Love And Joy. And When You Get Right Down To It, Nothing Else Really Matters.

Your Life Is Not Little, And Your Playing Small Doesn’t Serve The World. Your Living Large, On The Other Hand-your Being Your True Self Despite Fear, Fatigue, Doubt, And Opposition- Will Serve The World More Than You Can Imagine. In Fact, It May Help Save It. And Saving The World, After All, Is What All Heroes (including You) Are Here To Do.

Life Is Full Of Tough Decisions, And Nothing Makes Them Easy. But The Worst Ones Are Really Your Personal Koans, And Tormenting Ambivalence Is Just The Sense Of Satori Rising. Try, Trust, Try, And Trust Again, And Eventually You'll Feel Your Mind Change Its Focus To A New Level Of Understanding.

Own Your Failure Openly, Publicly, With Genuine Regret But Absolutely No Shame, And You’ll Reap A Harvest Of Forgiveness, Trust, Respect, And Connection-the Things You Thought You’d Get By Succeeding. Ironic, Isn’t It?

Does This Feel Warmer Or Colder?

Although Beauty May Be In The Eye Of The Beholder, The Feeling Of Being Beautiful Exists Solely In The Mind Of The Beheld.

Instead Of Hiding Your Loneliness, Bring It Into The Light. Honor It. Treat It. Heal It. You'll Find That It Returns The Favor.

Bad Habits Fill Needs, So Find Good Alternatives For Them.

Every Day Brings New Choices.

If You Think There Is No Action That You Can Perform In Your Current Circumstances That Will Increase The Supply Of Love In The World, You Are Believing A Lie. At The Very Least, You Always Have The Option To Offer Yourself Kindness And Understanding. That Alone Can Increase The Supply Of Love In The World.

The More You Claim Your Own Destiny, The Easier It Will Be To Love Unconditionally .

You Have The Freedom To Live And Let Live, To Love And Let Love. Granting Yourself That Freedom Is One Of The Healthiest, Most Constructive Things You Can Do For Yourself And The People Who Matter To You.

Live And Let Live

The Difference Between Success And Failure Isn't The Absence Of Fear But The Determination To Pursue Your Heart's Desires No Matter How Scared You Are.

The Moment We Begin Tolerating Meanness, In Ourselves And Others, We Are Using Our Authorial Power In The Service Of Wrongdoing. We Have Both The Capacity And The Obligation To Do Better.

I'm Not Saying We Have Power Over Everything In Our Lives - If That Were True, My Hair Would Look So, So Different - But I Am Saying That There's No Circumstance In Which We Are Completely Powerless.

I Once Read That Forgiveness Is Giving Up All Hope Of Having Had A Different Past...but Forgiving Is Not The Same As Obliterating Memory.

Bad Artists Ignore The Darkness Of Human Existence. Good Artists Often Get Stuck There. Great Artists Embrace The Full Catastrophe Of Our Condition And Find Beyond It An Even Deeper Truth Of Peace, Healing, And Redemption.

Explorers Depend On The North Star When There Are No Other Landmarks In Sight. The Same Relationship Exists Between You And Your Right Life, The Ultimate Realization Of Your Potential For Happiness. I Believe That A Knowledge Of That Perfect Life Sits Inside You Just As The North Star Sits In Its Unaltering Spot.

I’ll Tell You What It’s Time To Do Right Now. It’s Time To Set Your Schedule In Order So That You Don’t Look Back On The Day Of Your Death And Wonder Why You Never Really Lived. It’s Time To Ignore The Opinions Of Those Who Think Your Life Should Be All About Their Cause, Their Rules, Their Agenda, And Not Your Soul’s Desire. It’s Time To Stop Flagellating And Start Dancing.

Anyone Who Comes Into Your Life, Under Any Circumstances, Has Something To Teach You.

The Shortness Of Life, Which We All Discuss, But Which Is Very Clear To Me At The Moment, Makes Keeping And Spreading A Joyful Peace More Crucial Than Ever Before. Let Us Keep Our Minds On What Matters, Which Is Our Work, Which Is Astonishment And Gratitude. From This Quiet Magic Comes A Power For All Other New Years Wishes To Come True.

My Anguish Came From My Hypothesis That Other People's Hypothetical Hypotheses About Me Mattered. Ridiculous!

Pain Is Like A Life Coach In Your Body. It’s What Made Me A Life Coach Because I Started Paying A Lot Of Attention To What Made Me Hurt And What Didn’t. It Turned Out My Body Was Trying To Steer Me Away From A Life That Was Absolutely Wrong For Me And Into A Life That Was Absolutely Wonderful.

When Fear Makes Your Choices For You, No Security Measures On Earth Will Keep The Things You Dread From Finding You. But If You Can Avoid Avoidance - If You Can Choose To Embrace Experiences Out Of Passion, Enthusiasm, And A Readiness To Feel Whatever Arises - Then Nothing, Nothing In All This Dangerous World, Can Keep You From Being Safe.

Dangerous World

There Are Things That Can Only Happen Through You When You Are Still. Silence Is Often The Most Important Work You Can Do.

Your First Daily Priority Should Be Stillness, Attention To What You Really Know And What You Really Feel.

Be Brave Enough To Turn Away From Shiny Objects, And Toward The Light That Makes Them Shine.

Do Whatever Work Feeds Your True Self, Even If It’s Not A Safe Bet, Even If It’s Like A Crazy Risk, Even If Everyone In Your Life Tells You You’re Wrong Or Bad Or Crazy.

Do Something Today That You Think Is Too Delicious, Too Selfish, Too Wacky To Fit Within The Rules Of Your Life.

Only Since The Industrial Revolution Have Most People Worked In Places Away From Their Homes Or Been Left To Raise Small Children Without The Help Of Multiple Adults, Making For An Unsupported Life.

Your Individuality Is The Most Valuable Thing You Have.

Valuable Things

As Soon As You Think You Know Someone Else's Truth Better Than They Do, You Are In Deep Water.

Dawn Kotzer Is The Kind Of Coach Who Can See Beauty And Wisdom In Circumstances That Seem Ugly And Chaotic. She's Kind, Genuine And Honest, Willing And Able To See Where Her Clients Get Stuck And Gently Help Them Recover Their Freedom. Better Than A Coach Who Gives You The Answers, Dawn Will Help You Find The Answers To Your Life's Dilemmas That Are Already Within You.

The Process Of Spotting Fear And Refusing To Obey It Is The Source Of All True Empowerment.

Somewhere In There, Among The Worries, Questions, Advice And Advertising Jingles, Lives Your Intuition, Your True 'inner Voice.' You Can Hear It To The Extent That You Give It Your Attention.

You Shine For Who You Are ... Because No One Can Steal Your Light.

Constantly Measuring Ourselves Against Others Sours And Shortens Our Lives, Robbing Us Of The Very Things We Think It Will Bring: Prosperity, Love, Inner Peace, The Knowledge That We’re Good Enough.

When You Meet People, Show Real Appreciation, Then Genuine Curiosity.

I Want You To Be Supervised, All Day Every Day, By People Who Forgive Your Errors And Believe In Your Destiny.

Tiny Steps Will Get You To Your Goal Months And Months Sooner. A Little Is Better Than A Lot.

Play Until It's Time To Rest, Then Rest Until It's Time To Play.

From A Place Of Stillness, Openness, Forgiveness And Acceptance You Can Renew Your Commitment To Any Eating Plan You Like.

When We Run From Our Feelings, They Follow Us. Everywhere.

Take Off Your Watch: The Divine Is Speaking To You.

If You're A Bit Spongy, Vulnerable To The Unsettling Energy Of Others, Count Yourself Lucky. You've Been Given An Incentive To Armor Up, To Consciously Screen Out The Ubiquitous Stresses That Afflict Humanity.

Any Transition Serious Enough To Alter Your Definition Of Self Will Require Not Just Small Adjustments In Your Way Of Living And Thinking But A Full-on Metamorphosis.

Loneliness Is Proof That Your Innate Search For Connection Is Intact.

In Fact, When Care Appears, Unconditional Love Often Vanishes.

Unconditional Love

At Times In My Life, I Have Been Utterly Lonely. At Other Times, I've Had Disgusting Infectious Diseases. Try Admitting These Things In Our Culture.

Use Anything You Can Think Of To Understand And Be Understood, And You'll Discover The Creativity That Connects You With Others.

A Joyful Life Isn’t About Others; It’s About The Brightness That Is Associated With Being Alive. Your Path To It Is Through Anything That Replaces Thinking With Pure Flight, Pure Joy.

You Are Lovable. Can You Show Me Any Baby In Any Nursery Who Isn't Priceless? No. There's No Such Thing As A Worthless Newborn. And The Essential Value That Was Born Into Brand-new-baby You Can Never Be Extinguished. This Means That Even If You Think You're Being Absolutely Honest, Believing Yourself To Be Anything Other Than Astonishing, Incomparable, And Infinitely Precious Makes You A Habitual Liar.

The Idea Is To Identify A Destructive Thought Pattern, Then Simply Label It And Watch It And Let It Pass By Whenever It Appears In Your Mind.

Ten Bajillion Product Ads Notwithstanding, Your Looks Are Another Thing That's Basically Genetic.

If You're Religious, It Gives You A Perspective.

I Have Discovered That Many Of The Things I Thought Were Priceless Are As Cheap As Costume Jewelry, And Much Of What I Labeled Worthless Was, All The Time, Filled With The Kind Of Beauty That Directly Nourishes My Soul... Now I Think That The Vast Majority Of Us "normal" People Spend Our Lives Trashing Our Treasures And Treasuring Our Trash. We Bustle Around Trying To Create The Impression That We Are Hip, Imperturbable, Omniscient, In Perfect Control, When In Fact We Are Awkward And Scared And Bewildered.

Most People Think That Once They've Found Their Purpose And The Power To Practice It, They'll Finally Be At Peace. Actually, Though, It's Only By Starting In A Place Of Peace That We Find Our Purpose And Power. Peace Is The First Step And The Final Lesson We All Need To Learn.

Perpetually Doing, Without Ever Tuning In To The Center Of Our Being, Is The Equivalent Of Fueling A Mighty Ship By Tossing All Its Navigational Equipment Into The Furnace.

The Holy Days Are The Best Times To Focus On Real Enthusiasm, The Inner Source That Lightens And Sanctifies Our Lives All Year.

If You Did Nothing But Pursue The Truth About Yourself For The Rest Of Your Life, You Would Never Run Out Of Fresh Discoveries.

Rest Of Your Life

Stop Trying To Change Your Behavior; Instead, Rethink Your Beliefs

Conflict In Close Relationships Is Not Only Inevitable, It's Essential. Intimacy Connects People Who Are Inevitably Different.

Almost All My Middle-aged And Elderly Acquaintances, Including Me, Feel About 25, Unless We Haven't Had Our Coffee, In Which Case We Feel 107.

The Only Map Of Your Right Life Is Written On Your Soul At Its Most Peaceful, And The Only Sure Compass Is Your Heart At Its Most Open.

If Your Life Is Cloudy And You're Far, Far Off Course, You May Have To Go On Faith For A While, But Eventually You'll Learn That Every Time You Trust Your Internal Navigation System, You End Up Closer To Your Right Life.

To Care For Someone Can Mean To Adore Them, Feed Them, Tend Their Wounds. But Care Can Also Signify Sorrow, As In "bowed Down By Cares." Or Anxiety, As In "careful!" Or Investment In An Outcome, As In "who Cares?" The Word Love Has No Such Range Of Meaning: It's Pure Acceptance.

You're Exactly Where You're Meant To Be, Meandering Along A Crooked Path.

Infinite Possibilities

If You Ask People, As I Often Do, How They Make Decisions, 'lucky' People Will Talk About Tuning In To Information And Instincts, While 'unlucky' People Often Mention Pushing Away The Uncomfortable Feeling They Were Headed For Trouble.

Uncomfortable Feeling

Slow Is Fast, Gentle Is Powerful And Stillness Moves Mountains

The Way Out Of Fear Isn’t Safety. It’s Freedom.

Don't Fight Fearful Thoughts. Just Match Each One With An Alternative Thought That Brings You More Peace.

Make A Plan To Change The World. For One Night, Don't Disbelieve That You Can.

Your Body Is Free But Your Heart Is In Prison. To Release Your Heart, You Simply Reverse The Process Which Locked It Up. First You Begin To Listen For Messages From Your Heart-messages You May Have Been Ignoring Since Childhood. Next You Must Take The Daring, Risky Step Of Expressing Your Heart In The Outside World. . . . As You Learn To Live By Heart, Every Choice You Make Will Become Another Way Of Telling Your Story. . . . It Is The Way You Were Meant To Exist. If You Stop To Listen, You'll Realize That Your Heart Has Been Telling You So All Along.

The Knowledge Of Your Destiny Is Available To You, Well Before It Actually Happens, As A Message Streaming Continuously From Your Heart To Your Brain, Written In The Language Of Longing.

Most Of My Clients Don't Realize That The Way They Look And The Way They Think About Their Looks Are Two Separate Issues.

To Make An Activity Joyful, Keep Adding Things Until The Activity As A Whole Becomes More Appealing Than Repulsing.

To Attract Something That You Want, Become As Joyful As You Think That Thing Would Make You.

You Get Social Pressure From Your Parents, Who Teach You To Pay Attention To Certain Things And Not To Others. You Get It In School.

Social Pressure

A True Leader Is Not Someone Who Feels Fully Informed But Someone Who Continuously Receives Insight And Guidance.

Whenever You Go Somewhere That Speaks To Your Soul, You Are Going Home To Yourself.

The Part Of You That Is Unhampered By Illusion-the Illusion Of Time, The Illusion Of Powerlessness, The Illusion Of Impossibility-i S Waiting For You To Slow Down And Open Up So That It Can Speak To Your Consciousness. In Some Unguarded Moment, You Will Hear Its Wildly Improbable Words And Know That They Are Guiding You Home.

We Are A Time-starved People, Obsessed With Fitting Huge Achievements Into Our Few Years. In The Process, We Often Fill Our Buckets With Things That Don't Matter Or Work. But When We Give Up On Trying To Change What Can't Be Changed, And Simply Embrace What We Love, A Miracle Occurs. We Notice That The Moment To Be Happy Has Already Arrived. It's Here, Now.

You Can't Stay Well Without Telling--and Living--the Truth.

Instead Of Fretting About Getting Everything Done, Why Not Simply Accept That Being Alive Means Having Things To Do? Then Drop Into Full Engagement With Whatever You're Doing, And Let The Worry Go.

Absolutely Lonely People Have Few Personal Interactions Of Any Kind.

Where Your Attention Goes, Your Life Goes.

Friends, There Are Many Areas In Which I Need Encouragement, But Worrying Is Not One Of Them. I Worry The Way Renée Fleming Sings High Cs: Effortlessly. Loudly. At Length.

Good Fortune Has Side Effects.

Many Of Us Have Spent A Lifetime Trying To Be What We’re Not, Feeling Lousy About Ourselves When We Fail, And Sometimes When We Succeed. We Hide Our Differences When, By Accepting And Celebrating Them, We Could Collaborate To Make Every Effort More Exciting, Productive Enjoyable, And Powerful. Personally, I Think We Should Start Right Now.

Good-looking Individuals Are Treated Better Than Homely Ones In Virtually Every Social Situation, From Dating To Trial By Jury.

Looking For Love

This Very Moment Of Your Life, If You Experience It Fully, Will Show You Astonishing Wonders And Exquisite Delights.

I Now Believe That Bêtes Noires Usually Attack Because We're Thwarting Our Own Destinies. Calming The Beast Turns Us Toward Our Best Lives.

I Want You To Notice Is That-right Here, Right Now-you’re Okay. You May Be In Pain, You May Be In Fear, You May Be In Grief. But You’re Here, You’re Surviving; This Moment Is Okay.

True Freedom Starts With Absolute Honesty. The Moment You Call A Problem By Its Real Name, You’re Already Learning How To Make It Less Harmful.

Stop Fixating On Stuff You Can Touch And Start Caring About Stuff That Touches You.

I Am Free, And Always Have Been; Free To Accept My Own Reality, Free To Trust My Perceptions, Free To Believe What Makes Me Feel Sane Even If Others Call Me Crazy, Free To Disagree Even If It Means Great Loss, Free To Seek The Way Home Until I Find It.

If You Want To End Your Isolation, You Must Be Honest About What You Want At A Core Level And Decide To Go After It.

Try Seeing Your World And Yourself This Way, Eyes Open To Whatever Is Before You, Mind Free Of Dichotomies. Are You Good Or Bad, Fragile Or Tough, Wise Or Foolish? Yes. And So Am I.

Question Every Thought That Causes Suffering And Test It Against Your Own Sense Of Truth.

I'd Like To Help Repair The Earth's Ecosystems, And To Fully Live Until I'm Fully Dead.

If You Find Yourself Getting Nervous Stop And Relax For Three Full Breaths. Then Take One Small Step, Then Another. That Is How People Get To The Top Of Everest.

Finding Yourself

The Repercussions Of One Person Living In Stubborn Gladness Are Incalculable.

When You Are In A Creative Or Appreciative Zone, You Literally Have No Access To Your Inner Lizard, To That Fear-based, Non Creative, Shrieking Little Beasty Who's So Afraid You're Going To Be A Bag Lady.

It Isn’t Necessary To Know Exactly How Your Ideal Life Will Look; You Only Have To Know What Feels Better And What Feels Worse…begin Making Choices Based On What Makes You Feel Freer And Happier, Rather Than On How You Think An Ideal Life Should Look. It’s The Process Of Feeling Our Way Toward Happiness, Not The Realization Of The Platonic Ideal, That Creates Our Best Lives.

Whether You've Seen Angels Floating Around Your Bedroom Or Just Found A Ray Of Hope At A Lonely Moment, Choosing To Believe That Something Unseen Is Caring For You Can Be A Life-shifting Exercise.

If A Problem Looks Difficult, Relax. If It Looks Impossible, Relax Even More. Then Begin Encouraging Small Changes, Putting Just Enough Pressure On Yourself To Move One Turtle Step Forward. Then Rest, Savor, Celebrate. Then Step Again. You’ll Find That Slow Is Fast, Gentle Is Powerful, And Stillness Moves Mountains.

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