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Live In Contact With Dreams And You Will Get Something Of Their Charm: Live In Contact With Facts And You Will Get Something Of Their Brutality. I Wish I Could Find A Country To Live In Where The Facts Were Not Brutal And The Dreams Not Real.

-George Bernard Shaw

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Live In Contact With

George Bernard Shaw

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Live In Contact With Dreams And You Will Get Something Of Their Charm: Live In Contact With Facts And You Will Get Something Of Their Brutality. I Wish I Could Find A Country To Live In Where The Facts Were Not Brutal And The Dreams Not Real.

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Everything Happens To Everybody Sooner Or Later If There Is Time Enough.

The Mathematician Is Fascinated With The Marvelous Beauty Of The Forms He Constructs, And In Their Beauty He Finds Everlasting Truth.

Never Forget That If You Leave Your Law To Judges And Your Religion To Bishops, You Will Presently Find Yourself Without Either Law Or Religion.

Finding Yourself

Opera Is When A Tenor And Soprano Want To Make Love, But Are Prevented From Doing So By A Baritone.

Suppose The World Were Only One Of God's Jokes, Would You Work Any The Less To Make It A Good Joke Instead Of A Bad One?

If More Than Ten Percent Of The Public Likes A Painting, It Should Be Burned.

Gardening Is The Only Unquestionably Useful Job.

Life Contains But Two Tragedies. One Is Not To Get Your Heart's Desire; The Other Is To Get It.

I Like To Quote Myself Frequently And Often, It Makes Me Sound Much More Intelligent Than I Actually Am.

Imprisonment Is As Irrevocable As Death.

We Have In England A Curious Belief In First-rate People, Meaning All The People We Do Not Know; And This Consoles Us For The Undeniable Second-rateness Of The People We Do Know.

In Gambling The Many Must Lose In Order That The Few May Win.

Eternal Is The Fact That The Human Creature Born In Ireland And Brought Up In Its Air Is Irish. I Have Lived For Twenty Years In Ireland And For Seventy-two In England; But The Twenty Came First And In Britain I Am Still A Foreigner And Shall Die One.

Martyrdom, Sir, Is What These People Like: It Is The Only Way In Which A Man Can Become Famous Without Ability.

In The Arts Of Peace Man Is A Bungler.

As People Get Their Opinions So Largely From The Newspapers They Read... But The Press Is Not Free, The Newspapers Are Owned By Rich Men.

Imitation Is Not Just The Sincerest Form Of Flattery - It's The Sincerest Form Of Learning.

A Lifetime Of Happiness! No Man Alive Could Bear It: It Would Be Hell On Earth.

When An Apparent Miracle Happened.it Proved Divine Mission To The Credulous, And Proved A Contract With The Devil To The Skeptical.

Clever And Attractive Women Do Not Want To Vote; They Are Willing To Let Men Govern As Long As They Govern Men.

No Man Who Is Occupied In Doing A Very Difficult Thing, And Doing It Very Well, Ever Loses His Self-respect.

Revolutionary Moments Attract Those Who Are Not Good Enough For Established Institutions As Well As Those Who Are Too Good For Them.

Not Good Enough

Although I Cannot Lay An Egg, I Am A Very Good Judge Of Omelettes

Bourgeois Morality Is Largely A System Of Making Cheap Virtues A Cloak For Expensive Vices.

Those Who Can’t Change Their Minds Can’t Change Anything.

People Changing

Every Person Who Has Mastered A Profession Is A Skeptic Concerning It.

If We Have Come To Think That The Nursery And The Kitchen Are The Natural Sphere Of A Woman, We Have Done So Exactly As English Children Come To Think That A Cage Is The Natural Sphere Of A Parrot: Because They Have Never Seen One Anywhere Else.

Consciousness Of A Fact Is Not Knowing It: If It Were, The Fish Would Know More Of The Sea Than The Geographers And The Naturalists.

The Right To Know Is Like The Right To Live. It Is Fundamental And Unconditional In Its Assumption That Knowledge, Like Life, Is A Desirable Thing.

When A Thing Is Funny, Search It Carefully For A Hidden Truth.

The Technical History Of Modern Harmony Is A History Of Growth Of Toleration By The Human Ear Of Chords That At First Sounded Discordant And Senseless To The Main Body Of Contemporary Professional Musicians.

Unless The People Can Choose Their Leaders And Rulers, And Can Revoke Their Choice At Intervals Long Enough To Test Their Measuresby Results, The Government Will Be A Tyranny Exercised In The Interests Of Whatever Classes Or Castes Or Mobs Or Cliques Have This Choice.

The Way To Deal With Worldly People Is To Frighten Them By Repeating Their Scandalous Whisperings Aloud.

We Must Always Think About Things, And We Must Think About Things As They Are, Not As They Are Said To Be.

The Sex Illusion Is Not A Fixed Quantity: Not What Mathematicians Call A Constant. It Varies From Zero In My Wife's Case To Madness In That Of Our Stepsister.

This Is The True Joy In Life, The Being Used For A Purpose Recognized By Yourself As A Mighty One.

God's Trustiest Lieutenants Often Lack Official Credentials. They May Be Professed Atheists Who Are Also Men Of Honour And High Public Spirit.

Censorship Ends In Logical Completeness When Nobody Is Allowed To Read Any Books Except The Books That Nobody Can Read.

We Must Not Stay As We Are, Doing Always What Was Done Last Time; Or We Shall Stick In The Mud.

People Get Nothing Out Of Books But What They Bring To Them.

All Roads End At The Grave, Which Is The Gate To Nothingness.

Happiness And Beauty Are By-products. Folly Is The Direct Pursuit Of Happiness And Beauty.

As I Write, There Is A Craze For What Is Called Psychoanalysis, Or The Cure Of Diseases By Explaining To The Patient What Is The Matter With Him: An Excellent Plan If You Happen To Know What Is The Matter With Him, Especially When The Explanation Is That There Is Nothing The Matter With Him.

The Truth Is, Hardly Any Of Us Have Ethical Energy Enough For More Than One Really Inflexible Point Of Honor.

When You Find Something Funny Search It For Hidden Truth.

What Is Self-control? It Is Nothing But A Highly Developed Vital Sense, Dominating And Regulating The Mere Appetites. To Overlook The Very Existence Of This Supreme Sense; To Miss The Obvious Inference That It Is The Quality That Distinguishes The Fittest To Survive.

The More Reasonable A Student Was In Mathematics, The More Unreasonable She Was In The Affairs Of Real Life, Concerning Which Fewtrustworthy Postulates Have Yet Been Ascertained.

The Degree Of Tolerance Attainable At Any Moment Depends On The Strain Under Which Society Is Maintaining Its Cohesion.

Democracy Is A Word All Public Men Use And None Understand.

In A Battle All You Need To Make You Fight Is A Little Hot Blood And The Knowledge That It's More Dangerous To Lose Than To Win.

Unbounded Hopes Were Placed On Each Successive Extension Of The Electoral Franchise, Culminating In The Enfranchisement Of Women.these Hopes Have Been Disappointed, Because The Voters, Male And Female, Being Politically Untrained And Uneducated, Have (a) No Grasp Of Constructive Measures; (b) Loathe Taxation As Such; (c) Dislike Being Governed At All; And (d) Dread And Resent Any Extension Of Official Interference As An Encroachment On Their Personal Liberty.

Changeable Women Are More Endurable That Monotonous Ones; They Are Sometimes Murdered But Never Deserted.

The American White Relegates The Black To The Rank Of Shoeshine Boy; And He Concludes From This That The Black Is Good For Nothing But Shining Shoes.

We Throw The Whole Drudgery Of Creation On One Sex, And Then Imply That No Female Of Any Delicacy Would Initiate Any Effort In That Direction.

In An Article On Bunyan Lately Published In The "contemporary Review" - The Only Article On The Subject Worth Reading On The Subject I Ever Saw (yes, Thank You, I Am Familiar With Macaulay's Patronizing Prattle About "the Pilgrim's Progress") Etc.

Why Should We Take Advice On Sex From The Pope? If He Knows Anything About It, He Shouldn't!

Most People Do Not Pray; They Only Beg.

Youth Is A Wonderful Thing. What A Crime To Waste It On Children.

Reasonable Men Adapt Themselves To Their Environment; Unreasonable Men Try To Adapt Their Environment To Themselves. Thus All Progress Is The Result Of The Efforts Of Unreasonable Men.

Make Money And The Whole Nation Will Conspire To Call You A Gentleman.

If The English Can Survive Their Food, They Can Survive Anything.

It's A Dangerous Thing To Be Married Right Up To The Hilt, Like My Daughter's Husband. The Man Is At Home All Day, Like A Damned Soul In Hell.

People Always Get Tired Of One Another. I Grow Tired Of Myself Whenever I Am Left Alone For Ten Minutes, And I Am Certain That I Am Fonder Of Myself Than Anyone Can Be Of Another Person.

General Consultant To Mankind.

Give Me The Artist Who Breathes It Like A Native, And Goes About His Work In It As Quietly As A Common Man Goes About His Ordinary Business. Mozart Did So; And That Is Why I Like Him. Even If I Did Not, I Should Pretend To; For A Taste In His Music Is A Mark Of Caste Among Musicians, And Should Be Worn, Like A Tall Hat, By The Amateur Who Wishes To Pass For A True Brahmin.

A Man Ought To Be Able To Be Fond Of His Wife Without Making A Fool Of Himself About Her.

No Man Can Be A Pure Specialist Without Being In The Strict Sense An Idiot.

The Most Sincere Form Of Love Is Love For Food

Keep Away From Books And From Men Who Get Their Ideas From Books, And Your Own Books Will Always Be Fresh.

There Is Nothing On Earth Intended For Innocent People So Horrible As A School.

The Great Danger Of Conversion In All Ages Has Been That When The Religion Of The High Mind Is Offered To The Lower Mind, The Lower Mind, Feeling Its Fascination Without Understanding It, And Being Incapable Of Rising To It, Drags It Down To Its Level By Degrading It.

First Really Like Is Just A Little Bit Foolishness As Well As A Lot Of Curiosity. No Actually Self-respecting Girl Would Reap The Benefits Of It.

It Is Quite Useless To Declare That All Men Are Born Free If You Deny That They Are Born Good . Guarantee A Man's Goodness And His Liberty Will Take Care Of Itself. To Guarantee His Freedom On Condition That You Approve Of His Moral Character Is Formally To Abolish All Freedom Whatsoever, As Every Man's Liberty Is At The Mercy Of A Moral Indictment Which Any Fool Can Trump Up Against Everyone Who Violates Custom, Whether As A Prophet Or As A Rascal.

Security, The Chief Pretense Of Civilization, Cannot Exist Where The Worst Of Dangers, The Danger Of Poverty, Hangs Over Everyone's Head.

Even The Youngest Of Us May Be Wrong Sometimes.

The Practical Question, Then, Is What To Do With The Children. Tolerate Them At Home We Will Not. Let Them Run Loose In The Streets We Dare Not Until Our Streets Become Safe Places For Children, Which, To Our Utter Shame, They Are Not At Present, Though They Can Hardly Be Worse Than Some Homes And Some Schools.

A Miracle Is An Event Which Creates Faith. That Is The Purpose And Nature Of Miracles. Frauds Deceive. An Event Which Creates Faith Does Not Deceive: Therefore It Is Not A Fraud, But A Miracle.

I Have Found, After A Good Deal Of Consideration, That The Best Place To Seek God Is In A Garden. You Can Dig For Him Here.

It Is A Woman's Business To Get Married As Soon As Possible, And A Man's To Keep Unmarried As Long As He Can.

Home Life Is No More Natural To Us Than A Cage Is Natural To A Cockatoo.

Just As I Cannot Remember Any Time When I Could Not Read And Write, I Cannot Remember Any Time When I Did Not Exercise My Imagination In Daydreams About Women.

Life Is Too Short For Men To Take It Seriously.

Dying Is A Troublesome Business: There Is Pain To Be Suffered, And It Wrings One's Heart; But Death Is A Splendid Thing -a Warfare Accomplished, A Beginning All Over Again, A Triumph. You Can Always See That In Their Faces.

In Your Dread Of Dictators You Established A State Of Society In Which Every Ward Boss Is A Dictator, Every Private Employer A Dictator, Every Financier A Dictator, All With The Livelihood Of The Workers At His Mercy, And No Public Responsibility.

The Stock Actor Is A Stage Calamity

I Object To Publishers: The One Service They Have Done Me Is To Teach Me To Do Without Them. They Combine Commercial Rascality With Artistic Touchiness And Pettishness, Without Being Either Good Business Men Or Fine Judges Of Literature.

I Assume That To Prevent Illness In Later Life, You Should Never Have Been Born At All.

A Modern Gentleman [rich Person] Is Necessarily The Enemy Of His Country. Even In War He Does Not Fight To Defend It, But To Prevent His Power Of Preying On It From Passing To A Foreigner.

Man Can Climb To The Highest Summits, But He Cannot Dwell There Long.

For Four Wicked Centuries The World Has Dreamed This Foolish Dream Of Efficiency; And The End Is Not Yet. But The End Will Come.

The Wheels Are Turning, But The Hamsters Are All Dead. Make It Idiot-proof And Someone Will Make A Better Idiot. I Learned Long Ago, Never To Wrestle With A Pig, You Get Dirty; And Besides, The Pig Likes It.

Property, Said Proudhon, Is Theft. This Is The Only Perfect Truism That Has Been Uttered On The Subject.

The Sound Body Is The Product Of The Sound Mind.

To Me The Sole Hope Of Human Salvation Lies In Teaching Man To Regard Himself As An Experiment In The Realization Of God, To Regard His Hands As God's Hand, His Brain As God's Brain, His Purpose As God's Purpose. He Must Regard God As A Helpless Longing, Which Longed Him Into Existence By Its Desperate Need For An Executive Organ.

When The World Goes Mad, One Must Accept Madness As Sanity; Since Sanity Is, In The Last Analysis, Nothing But The Madness On Which The Whole World Happens To Agree.

Imprisonment, As It Exists Today, Is A Worse Crime Than Any Of Those Committed By Its Victims.

Islam Is The Best Religion And Muslims Are The Worst Followers

There Is No Subject On Which More Dangerous Nonsense Is Talked And Thought Than Marriage.

Parentage Is A Very Important Profession, But No Test Of Fitness For It Is Ever Imposed In The Interest Of The Children.

Democracy Is A Device That Insures We Shall Be Governed No Better Than We Deserve.

Better See Rightly On A Pound A Week Than Squint On A Million.

Instead Of Otello Being An Italian Opera Written In The Style Of Shakespeare, Othello Is A Play Written By Shakespeare In The Style Of Italian Opera.

Self-denial Is Not A Virtue; It Is Only The Effect Of Prudence On Rascality.

All Sorts Of Bodily Diseases Are Produced By Half-used Minds.

Miracles, In The Sense Of Phenomena We Cannot Explain, Surround Us On Every Hand: Life Itself Is The Miracle Of Miracles.

I Hate The Poor And Look Forward Eagerly To Their Extermination.

If Any Religion Had A Chance Of Ruling Over England, Nay Europe Within The Next Hundred Years, It Could Be Islam.

You Have Nothing To Do But Mention The Quantum Theory, And People Will Take Your Voice For The Voice Of Science, And Belive Anything.

Titles Distinguish The Mediocre, Embarrass The Superior, And Are Disgraced By The Inferior.

The Universal Regard For Money Is The One Hopeful Fact In Our Civilization. Money Is The Most Important Thing In The World. It Represents Health, Strength, Honor, Generosity And Beauty . . . . Not The Least Of Its Virtues Is That It Destroys Basic People As Certainly As It Fortifies And Dignifies Noble People.

This Is The True Joy In Life: Being Used For A Purpose Recognized By Yourself As A Mighty One, Being A Force Of Nature Instead Of A Feverish, Selfish Little Clod Of Ailments And Grievances, Complaining That The World Will Not Devote Itself To Making You Happy. I Am Of The Opinion That My Life Belongs To The Whole Community And As Long As I Live, It Is My Privilege To Do For It What I Can. It Is A Sort Of Splendid Torch Which I Have Got Hold Of For The Moment And I Want To Make It Burn As Brightly As Possible Before Handing It On To Future Generations.

If History Repeats Itself, And The Unexpected Always Happens, How Incapable Must Man Be Of Learning From Experience.

The Secret Of Being Miserable Is To Have Leisure To Bother About Whether You Are Happy Or Not. The Cure For It Is Occupation, Because Occupation Means Pre-occupation; And The Pre-occupied Person Is Neither Happy Nor Unhappy, But Simply Alive And Active. That Is Why It Is Necessary To Happiness That One Should Be Tired.

Freedom, My Good Girl, Means Being Able To Count On How Other People Will Behave.

My Reputation Grows With Every Failure.

Learning From Failure

Affection Between Adults - If They Are Really Adult In Mind And Not Merely Grown Up Children - And Creatures So Relatively Selfish And Cruel As Children Necessarily Are Without Knowing It Or Meaning It, Cannot Be Called Natural.

If Parents Would Only Realize How They Bore Their Children.

I Hope You Have Lost Your Good Looks, For While They Last Any Fool Can Adore You, And The Adoration Of Fools Is Bad For The Soul.

Beware Of False Knowledge; It Is More Dangerous Than Ignorance.

My Mother Married A Very Good Man ... And She Is Not At All Keen On My Doing The Same.

As 99 Per Cent Of English Authors And 100 Per Cent Of American Ones [authors] Are Just Such Imbeciles, Managers And Publishers Make A Practice Of Asking For Every Right The Author Possesses.

What Is Life But A Series Of Inspired Follies? The Difficulty Is To Find Them To Do. Never Lose A Chance: It Doesn’t Come Every Day.

My Situation Is A Solemn One: Life Is Offered To Me On The Condition Of Eating Beefsteaks. But Death Is Better Than Cannibalism. My Will Contains Directions For My Funeral, Which Will Be Followed, Not By Mourning Coaches, But By Oxen, Sheep, Flocks Of Poultry, And A Small Traveling Aquarium Of Live Fish, All Wearing White Scarves In Honor Of The Man Who Perished Rather Than Eat His Fellow Creatures. It Will Be, Without The Exception Of Noah's Ark, The Most Remarkable Thing Of Its Kind Ever Seen.

You Can Easily Find People Who Are Ten Times As Rich At Sixty As They Were At Twenty But Not One Of Them Will Tell You That They Are Ten Times As Happy

Your Heart And Your Mouth Wil Be In Two Separate Parts Of Your Body If You Again Forget In Whose Presence You Stand.

I Can Think Of No Other Edifice Constructed By Man As Altruistic As A Lighthouse. They Were Built Only To Serve.

The Goal Of An Artist Is To Create The Definitive Work That Cannot Be Surpassed.

I Feel Nothing But The Accursed Happiness I Have Dreaded All My Life Long: The Happiness That Comes As Life Goes, The Happiness Of Yielding And Dreaming Instead Of Resisting And Doing, The Sweetness Of The Fruit That Is Going Rotten.

I Have My Own Soul. My Own Spark Of Divine Fire.

I Sing, Not Arms And The Hero, But The Philosophic Man: He Who Seeks In Contemplation To Discover The Inner Will Of The World, Ininvention To Discover The Means Of Fulfilling That Will, And In Action To Do That Will By The So-discovered Means.

The Ordinary Man Is An Anarchist. He Wants To Do As He Likes. He May Want His Neighbour To Be Governed, But He Himself Doesn't Want To Be Governed. He Is Mortally Afraid Of Government Officials And Policemen.

Christianity As A Specific Doctrine Was Slain With Jesus, Suddenly And Utterly. He Was Hardly Cold In His Grave, Or High In His Heaven (as You Please), Before The Apostles Dragged The Tradition Of Him Down To The Level Of The Thing It Has Remained Ever Since.

Where Equality Is Undisputed, So Also Is Subordination.

Some People Look At The World And Say 'why?' Some People Look At The World And Say 'why Not?'

Positive Thinking

My Rank Is The Highest Known In Switzerland: I'm A Free Citizen.

The People Who Get On In This World Are The People Who Get Up And Look For The Circumstances They Want And If They Can't Find Them, Make Them.

I Do Not Want Actors And Actresses To Understand My Plays. That Is Not Necessary. If They Will Only Pronounce The Correct Sounds I Can Guarantee The Results.

Spend All You Have Before You Die, And Do Not Outlive Yourself.

Whisky Is Liquid Sunshine.

Hegel Was Right When He Said That We Learn From History That Men Never Learn Anything From History.

The Ability To Make Witty Observations Is Commonly Refered To As "cynism" By People Who Lack It.

Success Covers A Multitude Of Blunders.

Congratulations

You May Well Ask Me Why...i Took The Time To Write [books]. I Can Only Reply That I Do Not Know. There Was No Why About It. I Had To: That Was All.

When Two People Are Under The Influence Of The Most Violent, Most Insane, Most Delusive, And Most Transient Of Passions, They Are Required To Swear That They Will Remain In That Excited, Abnormal, And Exhausting Condition Continuously Until Death Do Them Part.

Reminiscences Make One Feel So Deliciously Aged And Sad.

What I Say Today Everybody Will Say Tomorrow, Though They Will Not Remember Who Put It Into Their Heads. Indeed They Will Be Right For I Never Remember Who Puts Things Into My Head : It Is The Zeitgeist.

Get Married, But Never To A Man Who Is Home All Day.

Never Waste Jealousy On A Real Man: It Is The Imaginary Man That Supplants Us All In The Long Run.

The Statesman Cannot Govern Without Stability Of Belief, True Or False.

The Moment We Face It Frankly We Are Driven To The Conclusion That The Community Has A Right To Put A Price On The Right To Live In It

An Englishman Thinks He Is Moral When He Is Only Uncomfortable.

You Don't Learn To Hold Your Own In The World By Standing On Guard, But By Attacking, And Getting Well Hammered Yourself.

I Love Little Children Too But I Don't Cut Off Their Heads And Stick Them In Vases.

How Can What An Englishman Believes Be Hearsay? It Is A Contradiction In Terms.

Pasteboard Pies And Paper Flowers Are Being Banished From The Stage By The Growth Of That Power Of Accurate Observation Which Is Commonly Called Cynicism By Those Who Have Not Got It...

The Thought Of Two Thousand People Crunching Celery At The Same Time Horrified Me.

The Domestic Career Is No More Natural To All Women Than The Military Career Is Natural To All Men.

Social Progress Takes Effect Through The Replacement Of All Institutions By New Ones; And Since Every Institution Involves The Recognition Of The Duty Of Conforming To It, Progress Must Involve The Repudiation Of An Established Duty At Every Step.

God Has Given Us A World That Nothing But Our Own Folly Keeps From Being A Paradise.

If You Would Stick To The Concrete, And Put Your Discoveries In The Form Of Entertaining Anecdotes About Your Adventures With Women, Your Conversation Would Be Easier To Follow.

One Man That Has A Mind And Knows It Can Always Beat Ten Men Who Haven't And Don't.

There Is Nothing On Earth More Exquisite Than A Bonny Book, With Well-placed Columns Of Rich Black Writing In Beautiful Borders, And Illuminated Pictures Cunningly Inset. But Nowadays, Instead Of Looking At Books, People Read Them. A Book Might As Well Be One Of Those Orders For Bacon And Bran.

[man] Progresses In All Things By Making A Fool Of Himself.

Forgive Him, For He Believes That The Customs Of His Tribe Are The Laws Of Nature!

Don't Wait For The Right Opportunity: Create It.

The Hand Of The Painter Is Incurably Mechanical: His Technique Is Incurably Artificial... The Camera... Is So Utterly Unmechanical.

Shall I Turn Up The Light For You? No, Give Me Deeper Darkness. Money Is Not Made In The Light.

We Learn From Experience That Men Never Learn Anything From Experience.

Virtue Consists, Not In Abstaining From Vice, But In Not Desiring It.

It Is Not The Number Of Years We Have Behind Us, But The Number We Have Before Us, That Makes Us Careful And Responsible And Determined To Find Out The Truth About Everything.

Beauty Is All Very Well At First Sight; But Who Ever Looks At It When It Has Been In The House Three Days?

I'm Only A Beer Teetotaler, Not A Champagne Teetotaler; I Don't Like Beer.

Idiots Are Always In Favour Of Inequality Of Income (their Only Chance Of Eminence), And The Really Great In Favour Of Equality.

I Have Studied Him - The Wonderful Man - And In My Opinion Far From Being An Anti-christ He Must Be Called The Saviour Of Humanity.

I Don't Know What To Say About This Book. The Experience On Which It Is Founded Is So Extraordinary, That An Honest Record Of It Should Be Preserved . . . But It Would Have Driven Me Mad; And I Am Not Sure That The Author Came Out Of It Without A Slight Derangement.

A Doctor's Reputation Is Made By The Number Of Eminent Men Who Die Under His Care.

A Conquered Nation Is Like A Man With Cancer: He Can Think Of Nothing Else.

Patriotism Is A Pernicious, Psychopathic Form Of Idiocy.

A Man Who Has No Office To Go, To I Don't Care Who He Is, Is A Trial Of Which You Can Have No Conception.

If You Can't Get Rid Of The Skeleton In Your Closet, You'd Best Teach It To Dance.

There Are No Secrets Better Kept Than The Secrets Everybody Guesses.

Keeping Secrets

Best Kept Secrets

There Is At Bottom Only One Genuinely Scientific Treatment For All Diseases, And That Is To Stimulate The Phagocytes.

Who Are Those We Love? Only Those We Do Not Hate.

The Vilest Abortionist Is He Who Attempts To Mould A Child's Character.

The Longer I Live, The More Convinced Am I That This Planet Is Used By Other Planets As A Lunatic Asylum.

Lunatic Asylums

The Trouble With Her Is That She Lacks The Power Of Conversation But Not The Power Of Speech.

The Road To Ignorance Is Paved With Good Editors.

Perhaps You Know Some Well-off Families Who Do Not Seem To Suffer From Their Riches. They Do Not Overeat Themselves; They Find Occupations To Keep Themselves In Health; They Do Not Worry About Their Position; They Put Their Money Into Safe Investments And Are Content With A Low Rate Of Interest; And They Bring Up Their Children To Live Simply And Do Useful Work. But This Means That They Do Not Live Like Rich People At All, And Might Therefore Just As Well Have Ordinary Incomes.

Nothing Is More Dangerous Than A Poor Doctor: Not Even A Poor Employer Or A Poor Landlord.

Custom Will Reconcile People To Any Atrocity, And Fashion Will Drive Them To Acquire Any Custom.

All Great Art And Literature Is Propaganda.

Life Would Be Tolerable But For Its Amusements.

Syllables Govern The World.

Most People Go To Their Grave With Their Music Inside Them.

Few People Think More Than Two Or Three Times A Year; I Have Made An International Reputation For Myself By Thinking Once Or Twice A Week.

You Don't Expect Me To Know What To Say About A Play When I Don't Know Who The Author Is, Do You? . . . If It's By A Good Author, It's A Good Play, Naturally. That Stands To Reason.

The Capacity Of Any Conqueror Is More Likely Than Not To Be An Illusion Produced By The Incapacity Of His Adversary.

Marry Ann; And At The End Of A Week You'll Find No More Inspiration In Her Than In A Plate Of Muffins.

Make Me A Beautiful Word For Doing Things Tomorrow; For That Surely Is A Great And Blessed Invention.

Imagination Is The Beginning Of Creation.

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