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I Must Remind You That Our Credulity Is Not To Be Measured By The Truth Of The Things We Believe. When Men Believed That The Earthwas Flat, They Were Not Credulous: They Were Using Their Common Sense, And, If Asked To Prove That The Earth Was Flat, Would Have Said Simply, "look At It." Those Who Refuse To Believe That It Is Round Are Exercising A Wholesome Skepticism.

-George Bernard Shaw

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I Must Remind You

George Bernard Shaw

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I Must Remind You That Our Credulity Is Not To Be Measured By The Truth Of The Things We Believe. When Men Believed That The Earthwas Flat, They Were Not Credulous: They Were Using Their Common Sense, And, If Asked To Prove That The Earth Was Flat, Would Have Said Simply, "look At It." Those Who Refuse To Believe That It Is Round Are Exercising A Wholesome Skepticism.

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Christianity As A Specific Doctrine Was Slain With Jesus, Suddenly And Utterly. He Was Hardly Cold In His Grave, Or High In His Heaven (as You Please), Before The Apostles Dragged The Tradition Of Him Down To The Level Of The Thing It Has Remained Ever Since.

I Wish To Boast That Pygmalion Has Been An Extremely Successful Play All Over Europe And North America As Well As At Home. It Is So Intensely And Deliberately Didactic, And Its Subject Is Esteemed So Dry, That I Delight In Throwing It At The Heads Of The Wiseacres Who Repeat The Parrot Cry That Art Should Never Be Didactic. It Goes To Prove My Contention That Art Should Never Be Anything Else.

As Long As You Don't Fly Openly In The Face Of Society, Society Doesn't Ask Any Inconvenient Questions; And It Makes Precious Short Work Of The Cads Who Do. There Are No Secrets Better Kept Than The Secrets Everybody Guesses.

I Never Thought Much Of The Courage Of A Lion Tamer. Inside The Cage He Is At Least Safe From People.

If I Refuse To Allow My Leg To Be Amputated, Its Mortification And My Death May Prove That I Was Wrong; But If I Let The Leg Go, Nobody Can Ever Prove That It Would Not Have Mortified Had I Been Obstinate. Operation Is Therefore The Safe Side For The Surgeon As Well As The Lucrative Side.

It Is Not True That Men Can Be Divided Into Absolutely Honest Persons And Absolutely Dishonest Ones. Our Honesty Varies With The Strain Put On It.

If Only For A Half Hour A Day, A Child Should Do Something Serviceable To The Community

The More Ignorant Men Are, The More Convinced Are They That Their Little Parish And Their Little Chapel Is An Apex To Which Civilization And Philosophy Has Painfully Struggled Up The Pyramid Of Time From A Desert Of Savagery.

I Really Don't Think I Could Consent To Go To Heaven If I Thought There Were No Animals There.

The Only Power A God Can Teach Is The Power Of Doing Without Happiness.

Reason Enslaves All Whose Minds Are Not Strong Enough To Master Her.

Men Are Always Thinking That They Are Going To Do Something Grandly Wicked To Their Enemies; But When It Comes To The Point, Really Bad Men Are Just As Rare As Really Good Ones.

The Conversion Of A Savage To Christianity Is The Conversion Of Christianity To Savagery.

Sherlock Holmes Was A Drug Addict Without A Single Amiable Trait.

I Can't Turn Your Soul On. Leave Me Those Feelings; And You Can Take Away The Voice And The Face. They Are Not You.

Fashions Are The Only Induced Epidemics, Proving That Epidemics Can Be Induced By Tradesmen.

What Englishman Will Give His Mind To Politics As Long As He Can Afford To Keep A Motor Car?

Religion Is A Good Invention In Times Of Stress.

It Is Feeling That Sets A Man Thinking, And Not Thought That Sets Him Feeling.

If There Is Anything I Hate In A Woman, It's Want Of Character.

Few Of Us Have Vitality Enough To Make Any Of Our Instincts Imperious.

Patriotism Is Your Conviction That This Country Is Superior To All Others Because You Were Born In It.

It Is One Of The Mysterious Ways Of Allah To Make Women Troublesome When He Makes Them Beautiful.

Vitality Is A Woman Is A Blind Fury Of Creation.

It Exasperated Her To Think That The Dungeon In Which She Had Languished For So Many Unhappy Years Had Been Unlocked All The Time, And That The Impulses She Had So Carefully Struggled With And Stifled For The Sake Of Keeping Well With Society, Were Precisely Those By Which Alone She Could Have Come Into Any Sort Of Sincere Human Contact.

Choose Silence Of All Virtues, For By It You Hear Other Men's Imperfections, And Conceal Your Own.

Of The Two Lots, The Woman's Lot Of Perpetual Motherhood, And The Man's Of Perpetual Babyhood, I Prefer The Man's.

The Truth Is, Hardly Any Of Us Have Ethical Energy Enough For More Than One Really Inflexible Point Of Honor.

That Is The Injustice Of A Woman's Lot. A Woman Has To Bring Up Her Children; And That Means To Restrain Them, To Deny Them Things They Want, To Set Them Tasks, To Punish Them When They Do Wrong, To Do All The Unpleasant Things. And Then The Father, Who Has Nothing To Do But Pet Them And Spoil Them, Comes In When All Her Work Is Done And Steals Their Affection From Her.

Girls, Like Men, Want To Be Petted, Pitied, And Made Much Of, When They Are Diffident, In Low Spirits, Or In Unrequited Love. These Are Services Which The Weak Cannot Render To The Strong And Which The Strong Will Not Render To The Weak, Except When There Is Also A Difference Of Sex.

Reformers Have The Idea That Change Can Be Achieved By Brute Sanity.

What We Want Is To See The Child In Pursuit Of Knowledge, And Not Knowledge In Pursuit Of The Child.

Ireland, Sir, For Good Or Evil, Is Like No Other Place Under Heaven, And No Man Can Touch Its Sod Or Breathe Its Air Without Becoming Better Or Worse.

Becoming Better

A Native American Elder Once Described His Own Inner Struggles In This Manner: Inside Of Me There Are Two Dogs. One Of The Dogs Is Mean And Evil. The Other Dog Is Good. The Mean Dog Fights The Good Dog All The Time. When Asked Which Dog Wins, He Reflected For A Moment And Replied, The One I Feed The Most.

My Main Reason For Adopting Literature As A Profession Was That, As The Author Is Never Seen By His Clients, He Need Not Dress Respectably.

Without Music We Shall Surely Perish Of Drink, Morphia, And All Sorts Of Artificial Exaggerations Of The Cruder Delights Of The Senses.

I Find That Socialism Is Often Misunderstood By Its Least Intelligent Supporters And Opponents To Mean Simply Unrestrained Indulgence Of Our Natural Propensity To Heave Bricks At Respectable Persons.

If You Go To Heaven Without Being Naturally Qualified For It You Will Not Enjoy Yourself There.

Unbounded Hopes Were Placed On Each Successive Extension Of The Electoral Franchise, Culminating In The Enfranchisement Of Women.these Hopes Have Been Disappointed, Because The Voters, Male And Female, Being Politically Untrained And Uneducated, Have (a) No Grasp Of Constructive Measures; (b) Loathe Taxation As Such; (c) Dislike Being Governed At All; And (d) Dread And Resent Any Extension Of Official Interference As An Encroachment On Their Personal Liberty.

Women Are Called Womanly Only When They Regard Themselves As Existing Solely For The Use Of Men.

There Is Not One Single Established Religion That An Intelligent, Educated Man Can Believe.

Now Of All The Idealist Abominations That Make Society Pestiferous I Doubt If There Be Any So Mean As That Of Forcing Self-sacrifice On A Woman Under The Pretense That She Likes It.

Spend All You Have Before You Die, And Do Not Outlive Yourself.

There Is No Satisfaction In Hanging A Man Who Does Not Object To It.

There Are Two Things Necessary To Salvation.... Money And Gunpowder.

No Man Can Be A Pure Specialist Without Being In The Strict Sense An Idiot.

In Your Dread Of Dictators You Established A State Of Society In Which Every Ward Boss Is A Dictator, Every Private Employer A Dictator, Every Financier A Dictator, All With The Livelihood Of The Workers At His Mercy, And No Public Responsibility.

Stop Being Jews And Start Being Human Beings.

If We Women Were Particular About Men's Characters, We Should Never Get Married At All.

It Is Well To Be Off With The Old Woman Before You're On With The New.

Think What Cowards Men Would Be If They Had To Bear Children. Women Are Altogether A Superior Species.

Democracy Means The Organization Of Society For The Benefit And At The Expense Of Everybody Indiscriminately And Not For The Benefit Of A Privileged Class.

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If A Woman Rebels Against High-heeled Shoes, She Should Take Care To Do It In A Very Smart Hat

No Diet Will Remove All The Fat From Your Body Because The Brain Is Entirely Fat. Without A Brain, You Might Look Good, But All You Could Do Is Run For Public Office.

God Has Given Us A World That Nothing But Our Own Folly Keeps From Being A Paradise.

The Utmost I Can Bear For Myself In My Best Days Is That I Was One Of The Hundred Best Playwrights In The World, Which Is Hardly A Supreme Distinction.

I Become More Convinced That Beings From Other Planets Are Using The Earth As A Lunatic Asylum

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Those Who Understand Evil Pardon It.

My Method Is To Take The Utmost Trouble To Find The Right Thing To Say, And Then To Say It With The Utmost Levity.

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You Don't Get Tired Of Muffins, But You Don't Find Inspiration In Them.

The Early Christian Rules Of Life Were Not Made To Last, Because The Early Christians Did Not Believe That The World Itself Was Going To Last.

It Is Most Unwise For People In Love To Marry.

The Confusing Of Marriage With Morality Has Done More To Destroy The Conscience Of The Human Race Than Any Other Single Error.

Both Optimists And Pessimists Contribute To Society. The Optimist Invents The Aeroplane, The Pessimist The Parachute.

You Are All Fundamentalists With A Top Dressing Of Science. That Is Why You Are The Stupidest Of Conservatives And Reactionists In Politics And The Most Bigoted Of Obstructionists In Science Itself. When It Comes To Getting A Move On You Are All Of The Same Opinion: Stop It, Flog It, Hang It, Dynamite It, Stamp It Out.

The Best Bought-up Children Are Those Who Have Seen Thier Parents As They Are. Hypocrisy Is Not The First Duty Of A Parent.

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I Claim To Be A Conscientiously Immoral Writer.

I Hate Performers Who Debase Great Works Of Art; I Long For Their Annihilation.

The Problem With The Press Is That They Can't Tell The Difference Between A Bicycle Crash And The End Of Civilization.

If Associations To Control Burglary And Murder Were Tolerated We Should Take It For Granted That The Members Should All Be Burglers And Murderers.

That Older And Greater Church To Which I Belong: The Church Where The Oftener You Laugh The Better, Because By Laughter Only Can You Destroy Evil Without Malice

A Socialist Is Somebody Who Doesn't Have Anything, And Is Ready To Divide It Up Equally Among Everybody.

Poverty Does Not Produce Unhappiness: It Produces Degradation.

Your Heart And Your Mouth Wil Be In Two Separate Parts Of Your Body If You Again Forget In Whose Presence You Stand.

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Hell Is Not All Paved With Bad Intentions.

An Author Who Gives A Manager Or Publisher Any Rights In His Work Except Those Immediately And Specifically Required For Its Publication Or Performance Is For Business Purposes An Imbecile.

The Reasonable Man Will Adjust To The Demands Of His Environment. The Unreasonable Man Expects His Environment To Adjust To His Own Needs. Therefore, All Progress Depends Upon The Unreasonable Man.

There Was Only One Virtue, Pugnacity; Only One Vice, Pacifism. That Is An Essential Condition Of War.

Every Person Who Has Mastered A Profession Is A Skeptic Concerning It.

Somemenare Bornkings; And Someare Bornstatesmen. The Two Are Seldom The Same.

We Cut The Throat Of A Calf And Hang It Up By The Heels To Bleed To Death So That Our Veal Cutlet May Be White; We Nail Geese To A Board And Cram Them With Food Because We Like The Taste Of Liver Disease; We Tear Birds To Pieces To Decorate Our Women's Hats; We Mutilate Domestic Animals For No Reason At All Except To Follow An Instinctively Cruel Fashion; And We Connive At The Most Abominable Tortures In The Hope Of Discovering Some Magical Cure For Our Own Diseases By Them.

Everybody Who Does Not Live In A Prostitute's Bed And On A Diet Of Cocaine Snow Is Called An Ascetic Nowadays.

My Religion? Well, My Dear, I Am A Millionaire. That Is My Religion.

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In This World There Is Always Danger For Those Who Are Afraid Of It.

Happiness And Beauty Are By-products.

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While Browsing In A Second-hand Bookshop One Day, George Bernard Shaw Was Amused To Find A Copy Of One Of His Own Works Which He Himself Had Inscribed For A Friend: "to ----, With Esteem, George Bernard Shaw." He Immediately Purchased The Book And Returned It To The Friend With A Second Inscription: "with Renewed Esteem, George Bernard Shaw.

Censorship Ends In Logical Completeness When Nobody Is Allowed To Read Any Books Except The Books That Nobody Can Read.

Deep Knowledge Is Not Knowledge Of The Thing Itself, But Knowledge Of A Thing Like The Thing. Then, You Gain Not One Knowledge, But Two Knowledges. Of The Thing. And Of The Original Thing With Is Like The Thing. Which Is The Barbarism Of The Privileged Class.

Great Art Is Never Produced For Its Own Sake. It Is Too Difficult To Be Worth The Effort.

Beware Of False Knowledge; It Is More Dangerous Than Ignorance.

I Have To Live For Others And Not For Myself: That's Middle-class Morality.

The Wheels Are Turning, But The Hamsters Are All Dead. Make It Idiot-proof And Someone Will Make A Better Idiot. I Learned Long Ago, Never To Wrestle With A Pig, You Get Dirty; And Besides, The Pig Likes It.

The Test Of Good Education Is Seeing How It Behaves In A Fight.

Fear Is Choosing The Safe Course

I Do Not, Like The Fundamentalists, Believe That Creation Stopped Six Thousand Years Ago After A Week Of Hard Work. Creation Is Going On All The Time.

With The Single Exception Of Homer, There Is No Eminent Writer, Not Even Sir Walter Scott, Whom I Can Despise So Entirely As I Despise Shakespeare When I Measure My Mind Against His. . . . It Would Positively Be A Relief To Me To Dig Him Up And Throw Stones At Him.

When You Prevent Me From Doing Anything I Want To Do, That Is Persecution; When I Prevent You From Doing Anything You Want To Do, That Is Law, Order, And Morals.

I Like Flowers, I Also Like Children, But I Do Not Chop Their Heads Off And Keep Them In Bowls Of Water Around The House.

The Whole World Is Strewn With Snares, Traps, Gins And Pitfalls For The Capture Of Men By Women.

The Anti-vivisector Does Not Deny That Physiologists Must Make Experiments And Even Take Chances With New Methods. He Says That They Must Not Seek Knowledge By Criminal Methods, Just As They Must Not Make Money By Criminal Methods. He Does Not Object To Galileo Dropping Cannon Balls From The Top Of The Leaning Tower Of Pisa; But He Would Object To Shoving Off Two Dogs Or American Tourists.

All Young Women Begin By Believing They Can Change And Reform The Men They Marry. They Can't.

Marriage Is The Most Licentious Of Human Institutions.

Build A System That Even A Fool Can Use, And Only A Fool Will Want To Use It.

Use It Or Lose It

The Most Tragic Thing In The World Is A Man Of Genius Who Is Not A Man Of Honor.

An Irishman's Imagination Never Lets Him Alone, Never Convinces Him, Never Satisfies Him; But It Makes Him That He Can't Face Reality Nor Deal With It Nor Handle It Nor Conquer It: He Can Only Sneer At Them That Do, And Be 'agreeable To Strangers', Like A Good-for-nothing Woman On The Streets.

Unless The People Can Choose Their Leaders And Rulers, And Can Revoke Their Choice At Intervals Long Enough To Test Their Measuresby Results, The Government Will Be A Tyranny Exercised In The Interests Of Whatever Classes Or Castes Or Mobs Or Cliques Have This Choice.

We Are The Living Graves Of Murdered Beasts.

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The Moment We Want To Believe Something, We Suddenly See All The Arguments For It, And Become Blind To The Arguments Against It.

Female Murderers Get Sheaves Of Offers Of Marriage.

A Broken Heart Is A Very Pleasant Complaint For A Man In London If He Has A Comfortable Income.

There May Be Some Doubt As To Who Are The Best People To Have Charge Of Children, But There Can Be No Doubt That Parents Are The Worst.

Crime Is Only The Retail Department Of What, In Wholesale, We Call Penal Law.

If You Say That God Is Good, Great, Blessed, Wise Or Any Such Thing, The Starting Point Is This : God Is.

Democracy Is A Word All Public Men Use And None Understand.

In A Battle All You Need To Make You Fight Is A Little Hot Blood And The Knowledge That It's More Dangerous To Lose Than To Win.

A Photographer Is Like A Cod, Which Produces A Million Eggs In Order That One May Reach Maturity.

The British Churchgoer Prefers A Severe Preacher Because He Thinks A Few Home Truths Will Do His Neighbors No Harm.

The Secret Of Being Miserable Is To Have Leisure To Bother About Whether You Are Happy Or Not. The Cure For It Is Occupation, Because Occupation Means Pre-occupation; And The Pre-occupied Person Is Neither Happy Nor Unhappy, But Simply Alive And Active. That Is Why It Is Necessary To Happiness That One Should Be Tired.

If There Was Twenty Ways Of Telling The Truth And Only One Way Of Telling A Lie, The Government Would Find It Out. It's In The Nature Of Governments To Tell Lies.

Make Money And The Whole Nation Will Conspire To Call You A Gentleman.

Revolutions Have Never Lightened The Burden Of Tyranny; They Have Only Shifted It To Another Shoulder.

As People Get Their Opinions So Largely From The Newspapers They Read... But The Press Is Not Free, The Newspapers Are Owned By Rich Men.

An Election Is A Moral Horror, As Bad As A Battle Except For The Blood; A Mud Bath For Every Soul Concerned In It.

The Notion That Inspiration Is Something That Happened Thousands Of Years Ago, And Was Then Finished And Done With. . . The Theory That God Retired From Business At That Period And Has Not Been Heard From Since, Is As Silly As It Is Blasphemous.

At Present, Intelligent People Do Not Have Their Children Vaccinated, Nor Does The Law Now Compel Them To. The Result Is Not, As The Jennerians Prophesied, The Extermination Of The Human Race By Smallpox; On The Contrary More People Are Now Killed By Vaccination Than By Smallpox.

And So, To The End Of History, Murder Shall Breed Murder, Always In The Name Of Right And Honor And Peace, Until The Gods Are Tired Of Blood And Create A Race That Can Understand.

Miracles, In The Sense Of Phenomena We Cannot Explain, Surround Us On Every Hand: Life Itself Is The Miracle Of Miracles.

I Have Always Held The Religion Of Muhammad In High Estimation Because Of Its Wonderful Vitality. It Is The Only Religion Which Appears To Me To Possess That Assimilating Capability To The Changing Phase Of Existence Which Can Make Itself Appeal To Every Age... I Have Studied Him - The Wonderful Man, And In My Opinion Far From Being An Anti-christ He Must Be Called The Saviour Of Humanity.

There Is No Subject On Which More Dangerous Nonsense Is Talked And Thought Than Marriage.

That Is The Whole Secret Of Successful Fighting. Get Your Enemy At A Disadvantage; And Never, On Any Account, Fight Him On Equal Terms.

War Can So Easily Be Gilt With Romance And Heroism And Solemn National Duty And Patriotism And The Like By Persons Whose Superficial Literary And Oratorical Talent Covers An Abyss Of Godforsaken Folly.

It Is Doubtless Wise, When A Reform Is Introduced, To Try To Persuade The British Public That It Is Not A Reform At All; But Appearances Must Be Kept Up To Some Extent At Least.

Stimulate The Phagocytes.

Revolutionary Moments Attract Those Who Are Not Good Enough For Established Institutions As Well As Those Who Are Too Good For Them.

Not Good Enough

Capitalism Justified Itself And Was Adopted As An Economic Principle On The Express Ground That It Provides Selfish Motives For Doing Good, And That Human Beings Will Do Nothing Except For Selfish Motives

The Criminal Law Is No Use To Decent People.

I Can't Control What Life Did To Me, But I Can Control How I React. Therein Lies The Difference.

Our Laws Make Law Impossible; Our Liberties Destroy All Freedom; Our Property Is Organized Robbery; Our Morality An Impudent Hypocrisy; Our Wisdom Is Administered By Inexperienced Or Mal-experienced Dupes; Our Power Wielded By Cowards And Weaklings; And Our Honour False In All Its Points. I Am An Enemy Of The Existing Order For Good Reasons

The Law Is Equal Before All Of Us; But We Are Not All Equal Before The Law. Virtually There Is One Law For The Rich And Another For The Poor, One Law For The Cunning And Another For The Simple, One Law For The Forceful And Another For The Feeble, One Law For The Ignorant And Another For The Learned, One Law For The Brave And Another For The Timid, And Within Family Limits One Law For The Parent And No Law At All For The Child.

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The Moment We Face It Frankly We Are Driven To The Conclusion That The Community Has A Right To Put A Price On The Right To Live In It

We Mustn't Be Stiff And Stand-off, You Know. We Must Be Thoroughly Democratic, And Patronize Everybody Without Distinction Of Class.

A Learned Man Is An Idler Who Kills Time By Study.

The Popular Definition Of Tragedy Is Heavy Drama In Which Everyone Is Killed In The Last Act, Comedy Being Light Drama In Which Everyone Is Married In The Last Act.

Nothing Remains Beautiful And Interesting Except Thought, Because The Thought Is The Life.

You Have Learnt Something. That Always Feels At First As If You Had Lost Something.

How Can What An Englishman Believes Be Hearsay? It Is A Contradiction In Terms.

I Don't. I Look My Age; And I Am My Age. It Is The Other People Who Look Older Than They Are. What Can You Expect From People Who Eat Corpses And Drink Spirits?

I Appeal To The Chemists To Discover A Humane Gas That Will Kill Instantly And Painlessly. In Short- A Gentlemanly Gas Deadly By All Means, But Humane, Not Cruel.

Men Get Tired Of Everything, Of Heaven No Less Than Of Hell; And That All History Is Nothing But A Record Of The Oscillations Of The World Between These Two Extremes. An Epoch Is But A Swing Of The Pendulum; And Each Generation Thinks The World Is Progressing Because It Is Always Moving.

A Man Has No Business To Marry A Woman Who Can't Make Him Miserable. It Means She Can't Make Him Happy.

A Man Never Tells You Anything Until You Contradict Him.

I Am Afraid We Must Make The World Honest Before We Can Honestly Say To Our Children That Honesty Is The Best Policy.

I Want To Be All Used Up When I Die.

Everyone Can See That The People Who Hunt Are The Right People And The People Who Don't Are The Wrong Ones.

Dying Is A Troublesome Business: There Is Pain To Be Suffered, And It Wrings One's Heart; But Death Is A Splendid Thing -a Warfare Accomplished, A Beginning All Over Again, A Triumph. You Can Always See That In Their Faces.

We Must Always Think About Things, And We Must Think About Things As They Are, Not As They Are Said To Be.

God Help England If She Had No Scots To Think For Her.

It Is Not That I Am So Clever; It Is That Everyone Else Is So Stupid.

The American Constitution, One Of The Few Modern Political Documents Drawn Up By Men Who Were Forced By The Sternest Circumstances To Think Out What They Really Had To Face, Instead Of Chopping Logic In A University Classroom.

Imagination Is The Beginning Of Creation.

You See Things And You Say, 'why?'. But I Dream Things And I Say, 'why Not?'.

Famous Inspirational

Reading Made Don Quixote A Gentleman, But Believing What He Read Made Him Mad.

I ... Must Continue To Strive For More Knowledge And More Power, Though The New Knowledge Always Contradicts The Old And The New Power Is The Destruction Of The Fools Who Misuse It.

We Are Made Wise Not By The Recollection Of Our Past, But By The Responsibility For Our Future.

It Is The Mark Of A Truly Intelligent Person To Be Moved By Statistics.

No Use Slaving For Me And Then Saying You Want To Be Cared For: Who Cares For A Slave? If You Come Back, Come Back For The Sake Of Good Fellowship; For You’ll Get Nothing Else.

A Man's Interest In The World Is Only An Overflow From His Interest In Himself.

An Asylum For The Sane Would Be Empty In America.

No Age Or Condition Is Without Its Heroes . The Least Incapable General In A Nation Is Its Cæsar, The Least Imbecile Statesman Its Solon , The Least Confused Thinker Its Socrates , The Least Commonplace Poet Its Shakespeare .

The Englishmen Is At His Best On The Links And At His Worst In The Cabinet.

I Showed My Appreciation Of My Native Land In The Usual Irish Way: By Getting Out Of It As Soon As I Possibly Could.

The Man With A Toothache Thinks Everyone Happy Whose Teeth Are Sound. The Poverty-stricken Man Makes The Same Mistake About The Rich Man.

It Was From Handel That I Learned That Style Consists In Force Of Assertion.

After Studying The Hungarian Language For Years, I Can Confidently Conclude That Had Hungarian Been My Mother Tongue, It Would Have Been More Precious. Simply Because Through This Extraordinary, Ancient And Powerful Language It Is Possible To Precisely Describe The Tiniest Differences And The Most Secretive Tremors Of Emotions.

People Get Nothing Out Of Books But What They Bring To Them.

The Conversion Of Paul Was No Conversion At All; It Was Paul Who Converted The Religion That Has Raised One Man Above Sin And Death.

You Have Nothing To Do But Mention The Quantum Theory, And People Will Take Your Voice For The Voice Of Science, And Belive Anything.

The Great Dramatist Has Something Better To Do Than To Amuse Either Himself Or His Audience. He Has To Interpret Life.

Something Better

Suppose The World Were Only One Of God's Jokes, Would You Work Any The Less To Make It A Good Joke Instead Of A Bad One?

Whisky Is Liquid Sunshine.

If Women Were As Fastidious As Men, Morally Or Physically, There Would Be An End Of The Race.

Even To This Day It Is Easier Than It Ought To Be For Me To Get A Rise Out Of An American By Telling Him Something About Himself Which Is Equally True About Every Human Being On The Face Of The Globe. He At Once Resents This As A Disparagement And An Assertion On My Part That People In Other Parts Of The Globe Are Not Like That, And Are Loftily Superior To Such Weaknesses.

Financiers Live In A World Of Illusion. They Count On Something Which They Call The Capital Of The Country, Which Has No Existence.

Custom Will Reconcile People To Any Atrocity, And Fashion Will Drive Them To Acquire Any Custom.

Hatred Is The Coward's Revenge For Being Intimidated.

After All, The Wrong Road Always Leads Somewhere.

A Fool-proof Method For Sculpting An Elephant: First, Get A Huge Block Of Marble; Then You Chip Away Everything That Doesn't Look Like An Elephant.

No Man Who Is Occupied In Doing A Very Difficult Thing, And Doing It Very Well, Ever Loses His Self-respect.

When A Prisoner Sees The Door Of His Dungeon Open, He Dashes For It Without Stopping To Think Where He Shall Get His Dinner Outside.

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Never Repeat Old Grievances.

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