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I Have Never Had Parents Who Set Good Examples, Parents Whose Expectations Were Worth Living Up To, But She Did. I Can See Them Within Her, The Courage And The Beauty They Pressed Into Her Like A Handprint.

-Veronica Roth

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I Have Never Had

Veronica Roth

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I Have Never Had Parents Who Set Good Examples, Parents Whose Expectations Were Worth Living Up To, But She Did. I Can See Them Within Her, The Courage And The Beauty They Pressed Into Her Like A Handprint.

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I Think It's A Human Tendency That's Been Around For A While To Try To Be As Good As Possible To Prove Your Worth.

I Might Be In Love With You." He Smiles A Little. "i'm Waiting Until I'm Sure To Tell You, Though.

Decades Ago, Our Ancestors Realized That It Is Not Just Political Ideology, Religious Belief, Race, Or Nationalism That Is To Blame For A Warring World. Rather, They Determined That It Was The Fault Of Human Personality - Of Humankind's Inclination Towards Evil, In Whatever Form That Is. They Divided Into Factions That Sought To Eradicate Those Qualities They Believed Responsible For The World's Disarray.

I See A Few Hands Stretching Out To Me At The Edge Of The Net, So I Grabbed The First One I Could Reach And Pull Myself Across. I Roll Off, And Would Have Fallen Face-first Onto A Wood Floor If He Had Not Caught Me. "he" Is The Young Man Attached To The Hand I Grabbed. He Has A Spare Upper Lip And A Full Lower Lip. His Eyes Are So Deep-set That His Eyelashes Touch The Skin Under His Eyebrows, And They Are Dark Blue, A Dreaming, Sleeping, Waiting Color.

Now She Looks Pale And Small, But Her Eyes Make Me Think Of Wide- Open Skies That I Have Never Actually Seen, Only Dreamed Of.

I'm Surprised You Know That," I Say Quietly, " Since You Left Halfway Through My One And Only Fight." "it Wasn't Something I Wanted To Watch." He Says. What's That Supposed To Mean?

It's Not Cruelty, Maybe, But A Desire To Understand That Motivates Them.

I Have Your Back. I Didn't Mean Only When It's Easy. All The Time.

I Want People To Come Away From My Book With Questions. Questions About Virtue And Goodness. Not Answers.

Knowledge Is Power. Power To Do Evil...or Power To Do Good. Power Itself Is Not Evil. So Knowledge Itself Is Not Evil.

Knowledge And Power

Knowledge Is Power

I Want To Be Brave, And Selfless, And Smart, And Kind, And Honest.

Every Question That Can Be Answered Must Beanswered Or At Least Engaged. Illogical Thought Processes Must Bechallenged When They Arise.wrong Answers Must Be Corrected.correct Answers Must Be Affirmed. —from The Erudite Faction Manifesto

The Serum Wears Off Five Hours Later, When The Sun Is Just Beginning To Set. Tobias Shut Me In My Room For The Rest Of The Day, Checking On Me Every Hour. This Time When He Comes In, I Am Sitting On The Bed, Glaring At The Wall. “thank God,” He Says, Pressing His Forehead To The Door. “i Was Beginning To Think It Would Never Wear Off And I Would Have To Leave You Here To … Smell Flowers, Or Whatever You Wanted To Do While You Were On That Stuff.

Creemos Enla Valentía. Creemos En Tomar Acciones. Creemos En La Liberarnos Del Miedo Y En La Adquisición De Habilidades Necesarias Para Obligar A Que Lo Malos Salga De Nuestro Mundo Para Que El Bien Pueda Prosperar Y Florecer

Guilt [is] A Tool, Rather Than A Weapon Against The Self.

Resisting Is Worth Doing.

Thank You For Your Honesty.

Peter Would Probably Throw A Party If I Stopped Breathing.' 'well,' He Says, 'i Would Only Go If There Was Cake.

Though He Does Not Touch Me, He Steadies Me.

It's Stupid To Miss A Thing When There Are So Many People To Miss Instead, But I Miss This Train Already, And All The Others That Carried Me Through The City, My City, After I Was Brave Enough To Ride Them. I Brush My Fingers Over The Car Wall, Just Once, And Then Jump.

I Frown At Him. How Does He Know All This Information? And Why, After Two Years Of Avoiding Becoming A Dauntless Leader At All Costs, Is He Suddenly Acting Like One?

Sometimes I Feel Like There Is So Much To Be Afraid Of, And Sometimes I Feel Like There Is Nothing Left To Fear.

Shh,” I Say. “arms Around Me.” Obediently, He Slips Both Arms Around My Waist. I Smile At The Wall. I Am Not Enjoying This. I Am Not, Not Even A Little Bit, No.

He Bends Over To Untie His Shoes. “so, Have You Been Ostracized From Your Little Crowd Of Devotees?” “no,” I Say Automatically. Then I Add, “maybe. But They Aren’t My Devotees.” “please. They’re Like The Cult Of Four.” I Can’t Help But Laugh. “jealous? Wish You Had A Cult Of Psychopaths To Call Your Very Own?

I Look Older. Maybe It's The Short Hair Or Maybe It's Just That I Wear All That Has Happened Like A Mask. Either Way, I Always Thought I Would Be Happy When I Stopped Looking Like A Child. But All I Feel Is A Lump In My Throat. I Am No Longer The Daughter My Parents Knew. They Will Never Know Me As I Am Now.

Cowardice Is How You Decide To Be In Real Life

From Your Results I Have Determined That You Are One Of The Strongest Divergent, Which I Say Not To Compliment You But To Explain My Purpose. If I Am To Develop A Simulation That Cannot Be Thwarted By The Divergent Mind, I Must Study The Strongest Divergent Mind In Order To Shore Up All Weaknesses In The Technology.

Compliments You

Trust Me When I Tell You, Eaton Boy, That Resisting Is Worth Doing.

Is This Prior?" "in The Flesh." "why's He Bleeding?" "because He's An Idiot." Zeke Offers Me A Black Jacket With A Factionless Symbol Stitched Into The Collar. "i Didn't Know That Idiocy Caused People To Just Start Spontaneously Bleeding From The Nose." I Wrap The Jacket Around Caleb's Shoulders And Fasten One Of The Buttons Over His Chest. He Avoids My Eyes. "i Think It's A New Phenomenon.", I Say.

If You Are Really One Of Us, It Won't Matter To You That You Might Fail. And If It Does, You Are A Coward.

Sometimes Crying Or Laughing Are The Only Options Left, And Laughing Feels Better Right Now.

Before She Got Here Everything Had Stalled Inside Me, And Every Morning I Was Just Moving Toward Nighttime.

I Will Be My Undoing If I Become My Obsession.

It's Not That I Ever Sat Down And Outlined A Trilogy, But I Always Have A Sense Of What Size An Idea Is When I Start It.

I Don't Know If You Know This," Tobias Says, "but Edward Is A Little Unstable." "i'm Getting That," I Say. "that Drew Guy Who Helped Peter Perform That Butterknife Maneuver," Tobias Says. "apparently When He Got Kicked Out Of Dauntless, He Tried To Join The Same Group Of Factionless Edward Was A Part Of. Notice That You Haven't Seen Drew Anywhere.

Don't Confuse Your Grief With Guilt.

An Artist Gives. Gives Visually, Gives Through Courses, Or With Free Advice, Through Generosity Of Spirit And Through A Need To Share.

"i'll Be Your Family Now," He Says. "i Love You," I Say. He Stares At Me. I Wait With My Hands Clutching His Arms For Stability As He Considers His Response. He Frowns At Me. "say It Again." "tobias," I Say, "i Love You."

If I Let A Little Of The Emotion Out, All Of It Will Come Out, And It Will Never End.

I Cross My Arms. "it Was A Two Minute Conversation." "i Don't Think A Smaller Time Frame Makes It Less Unwise." He Furrows His Eyebrows And Touches The Corner Of My Bruised Eye With His Fingertips. My Head Jerks Back, But He Doesn't Take His Hand Away. Instead He Sighs. "you Know, If You Could Just Learn To Attack First, You Might Do Better." "attack First?" I Say. "how Will That Help?" "you're Fast. If You Can Get A Few Good Hits In Before They Know What's Going On, You Could Win." He Shrugs, And His Hand Falls.

Are You Asking Me To Undress, Tris?' A Nervous Laugh Gurgles From My Throat. 'only ... Partially

Which Means That In Order To Defeat Her, I Have To Think Of A Way To Defeat Myself. And How Can I Be A Better Fighter Than Myself, If She Knows The Same Strategies I Know, And Is Exactly As Resourceful And Clever As I Am?

There Is Power In Controlling Something That Can Do So Much Damage - In Controlling Something, Period.

I Met Him While I Was Imprisoned," I Say, And My Voice Sounds Far Away Even To Me. "i Was Just Curious." "i Wouldn't Judge Him Too Harshly," Says Fernando. "jeanine Can Be Extraordinarily Persuasive To Those Who Aren't Naturally Suspicious. I Have Always Been Naturally Suspicious." ... "yeah," I Say. "so Have I.

I Decide To Do What I Always Do When I'm Not Sure What's Going On: I Act Like Everyone Else.

If You Actually Succeed In Creating A Utopia, You've Created A World Without Conflict, In Which Everything Is Perfect. And If There's No Conflict, There Are No Stories Worth Telling - Or Reading!

Hearing Him Talk About His Mother, About His Intact Family, Makes My Chest Hurt For A Second, Like Someone Pierced It With A Needle.

Missing Someone

Soon I Will Honor My Parents By Dying As They Died. And If All They Believed About Death Was True, Soon I Will Join Them In Whatever Comes Next.

Lynn Smacks Uriah Hard In The Back Of The Head, Christina Says, “hey Tris!” And Uriah Cries, “ow! How On Earth Do You Make A Pillow Hurt, Lynn?” “my Exceptional Strength,” She Says.

She Must Love Me, To Worry About Me. She Must Still Be Capable Of Love.

I Do Like To Hit People-i Like The Explosion Of Power And Energy, And The Feeling That I Am Untouchable Because I Can Hurt People. But I Hate That Part Of Myself, Because It Is The Part Of Me That Is The Most Broken

I Was So Afraid That We Would Just Keep Colliding Over And Over Again If We Stayed Together, And That Eventually The Impact Would Break Me. But Now I Know I Am Like The Blade And He Is Like The Whetstone- I Am Too Strong To Break So Easily, And I Become Better, Sharper, Every Time I Touch Him.

My Tris Should Look Pale And Small--she Is Pale And Small, After All--but Instead The Room Is Full Of Her.

Oh. I Just Assumed... That Because I Am So Absorbed By Him Everyone Must Be Too.

I Slowly Realized That Perfectionism Just Not That Important. What's More Important Is To Try To Love The People Around You. Whatever That Means At A Particular Time Is The Best You Can Do.

They Try To Make You Think They Care About What You Do But They Don't. They Don't Want You To Act A Certain Way. So You're Easy To Understand. So You Won't Pose A Threat To Them.

Sometimes Pain Is For The Greater Good.

I Try To Leave Some Space In My Mind For Things To Surprise Me Or Change My Mind, I Think That's Important.

I Don't Want To Stop You. I Want You To Stop Yourself.

The Amity Established This Place As A Safe House. No Conflict Allowed." "the Amity Will Have Trouble Enforcing That Policy," Says Marcus. "how Do You Stop Conflict Without Conflict?

Reading Is Such A Huge Part Of My Life.

Learning How To Think In The Midst Of Fear Is A Lesson That Everyone Needs To Learn.

And Is It Selfish Of Me To Crave Victory, Or Is It Brave?

Instead I Just Let The Silence Stretch Out Between Us. It's The Only Adequate Response To What He Just Told Me, The Only That Does The Tragedy Any Justice Instead Of Patching It Hastily And Moving On.

A Brave Man Acknowledges The Strength Of Others.

Abnegation Produces Deeply Serious People. People Who Automatically See Things Like Need,” He Says. “i’ve Noticed That When People Switch To Dauntless, It Creates Some Of The Same Types. Erudite Who Switch To Dauntless Tend To Turn Cruel And Brutal. Candor Who Switch To Dauntless Tend To Become Boisterous, Fight-picking Adrenaline Junkies. And Abnegation Who Switch To Dauntless Become . . . I Don’t Know, Soldiers, I Guess. Revolutionaries.

I Get Up, Because I’m Supposed To, But If It Were Up To Me, I’d Stay In My Seat For The Rest Of Time.

One Choice Can Transform You. One Choice Can Destroy You. Once Choice Will Define You.

I Laugh Shakily. ‘you’re A Little Scary, Four.’ ‘do Me A Favor,’ He Says, ‘and Don’t Call Me That.’ ‘what Should I Call You, Then?’ ‘nothing.’ He Takes His Hand From My Face. ‘yet.

That's What Love Does. When It's Right, It Makes You More Than You Were, More Than You Thought You Could Be.

I Confessed To Tobias, Soon After That, That I Had Lost My Entire Family. And He Assured Me That He Was My Family Now. -tris Prior

She Has Been To The Compound Before. She Remembered This Hallway. She Knows About The Initiation Process. My Mother Was Dauntless.

I Am His, And He Is Mine, And It Has Been That Way All Along.

We Believe In Ordinary Acts Of Bravery, In The Courage That Drives One Person To Stand Up For Another.

I Have Done Bad Things. I Can't Take Them Back, And They Are Part Of Who I Am. Most Of The Time, They Seem Like The Only Thing I Am.

I Understand Why She Did All Those Things, But That Doesn't Mean We Aren't Still Broken.

What's Worse: To Be Idle While Someone Dies, Or To Be Exiled And Empty-handed?

Take A Person’s Memories, And You Change Who They Are.

"welcome To The Amity Compound," Johanna's Eyes Fix On My Face, And She Smiles Crookedly. "let Us Take Care Of You."

Nothing Else Is All Right.” His Whisper Tickles My Cheek. “but We Are.

I Have A Theory That Selflessness And Bravery Aren't All That Different.

The Cruelty Of Fate Is That I Must Travel With The People I Hate When The People I Love Are Dead Behind Me.

His Fingers Leave Streaks Of Cold On My Skin, Invisible To The Eye, And I Think About Wrapping His Shirt Around My Fist And Pulling Him In To Kiss Me; I Think About Pressing Myself Against Him, But I Can't, Because All Our Secrets Would Keep A Space Between Us.

Living Without Virtues Is To Live Divorced From Society, Seperated From The Most Important Thing In Life, Community.

There Are So Many Ways To Be Brave In This World. Sometimes Bravery Involves Laying Down Your Life For Something Bigger Than Yourself, Or For Someone Else. Sometimes It Involves Giving Up Everything You Have Ever Known, Or Everyone You Have Ever Loved, For The Sake Of Something Greater. But Sometimes It Doesn't. Sometimes It Is Nothing More Than Gritting Your Teeth Through Pain, And The Work Of Every Day, The Slow Walk Toward A Better Life. That Is The Sort Of Bravery I Must Have Now.

A Dauntless Ferris Wheel Wouldn’t Have Cars. You Would Just Hang On Tight With Your Hands, And Good Luck To You.

I Belong To The People I Love, And They Belong To Me--they, And The Love And Loyaty I Give Them, Form My Identity Far More Than Any Word Or Group Ever Could.

Ser Sincero En Todo Momento Debe Requerir Valor. Yo No Sabría Hacerlo.

This Was The First Place I Everfelt Strong. Every Time I Breathe This Air I Feel It Again.

Human Reason Can Excuse Any Evil.

She Wanted Us To Have More Than Five Choices. Now We Have None.

I Get The Strange Urge To Hit My Head Against The Wall. Other People's Sobs Make Me Feel Uncomfortable.

I Know Some Things--i Know That I'm Not Alone, That I Have Friends, That I'm In Love. I Know That I Don't Want To Die, And For Me That's Something--more Than I Could Have Said A Few Weeks Ago.

Come On,'he Says.' I Have Something Else To Show You.

Tobias And Tris

Everything - Our Houses, Our Clothes, Our Hairstyles - Is Meant To Help Us Forget Ourselves And To Protect Us From Vanity, Greed And Envy, Which Are Just Forms Of Selfishness. If We Have Little, And Want For Little, And We Are All Equal, We Envy No One.

If Someone Offer You An Opportunity To Get Closer To Your Enemy, You Always Take It.

It Was Him Or Me. I Chose Me. But I Feel Dead Too.

So How Can I Hold Tobias’s Desperation Against Him, Like I’m Better Than Him, Like I’ve Never Let My Own Brokenness Blind Me?

It Doesn't Prove Anything Except That You're Bullying Us. Which, As I Recall, Is A Sign Of Cowardice.

The Gun Goes Off. I Fall.

My Body Rises With The Water. Instead Of Kicking My Feet To Stay Abreast Of It, I Push All The Air From My Lungs And Sink To The Bottom. The Water Muffles My Ears. I Feel Its Movement Over My Face. I Think About Snorting The Water Into My Lungs So It Kills Me Faster, But I Can't Bring Myself To Do It. I Blow Bubbles From My Mouth. Relax. I Close My Eyes. My Lungs Burn.

For God's Sake, Stiff," He Says. "you Don't Have To Follow Me," I Say Staring At The Maze Of Bars Above Me. I Shove My Foot Onto The Place Where Two Bars Cross And Push Myself Up, Grabbing Another Bar In The Process. I Sway For A Second, My Heart Beating So Hard I Can't Feel Anything Else. Every Thought I Have Condenses Into That Heartbeat, Moving At The Same Rhythm. "yes, I Do," He Says.

I Am No Longer Tris, The Selfless, Or Tris, The Brave. I Suppose That Now, I Must Become More Than Either.

I Am Wearing A Gray Shirt, Blue Jeans, Black Shoes--new Clothes, But Beneath Them, My Dauntless Tattoos. It Is Impossible To Erase My Choices. Especially These.

But Maybe What I Saw As Fearless Was Actually Fear Under Control.

I Have Something I Need To Tell You," He Says. I Run My Fingers Along The Tendons In His Hands And Look Back At Him. "i Might Be In Love With You." He Smiles A Little. "i'm Waiting Until I'm Sure To Tell You, Though." "that's Sensible Of You," I Say, Smiling Too. "we Should Find Some Paper So You Can Make A List Or A Chart Or Something." I Feel His Laughter Against My Side, His Nose Sliding Along My Jaw, His Lips Pressing My Ear. "maybe I'm Already Sure," He Says, "and I Just Don't Want To Frighten You." I Laugh A Little. "then You Should Know Better." "fine," He Says. "then I Love You.

Being Honest Doesn't Mean You Say Whatever You Want, Wherever You Want. It Means That What You Choose To Say Is True.

I Note How Calm She Looks And How Focused She Is. She Is Well-practiced In The Art Of Losing Herself. I Can't Say The Same Of Myself.

I Think I Speak For Everyone," He Says, "when I Say You Have Earned The Title Of Dauntless".

Then I Realize What It Is. It's Him. Something About Him Makes Me Feel Like I Am About To Fall. Or Turn To Liquid. Or Burst Into Flames.

Dauntless,' He Says. 'i Was Born For Abnegation. I Was Planning On Leaving Dauntless, And Becoming Factionless. But Then I Met Her, And...i Felt Like Maybe I Could Make Something More Of My Decision.' Her. For A Moment, It's Like I'm Looking At A Different Person, Sitting In Tobias's Skin, One Whose Life Is Not As Simple As I Thought. He Wanted To Leave Dauntless, But He Stayed Because Of Me. He Never Told Me That.

Relax Beatrice, I've Driven A Car Before.' Marcus 'i've Done A Lot Of Things Before, But That Doesn't Mean I'm Any Good At Them!' Tris

Why Do People Want To Pretend That Death Is Sleep? It Isn't. It Isn't.

But I Understand Now What Tori Said About Her Tattoo Representing A Fear She Overcame-a Reminder Of Where She Was, As Well As A Reminder Of Who She Is Now. Maybe There Is A Way To Honor My Old Life As I Embrace My New One. "yes," I Say. "three Of These Flying Birds." I Touch My Collarbone, Marking The Path Of Their Flight-toward My Heart. One For Each Member Of The Family I Left Behind.

I Notice, However, That Peter Only Pretends To Inject Himself—when He Presses The Plunger Down, The Fluid Runs Down His Throat, And He Wipes It Casually With A Sleeve. I Wonder What It Feels Like To Volunteer To Forget Everything.

Forget Everything

Sometimes I Forget That I Can Hurt You. That You Are Capable Of Being Hurt

What Good Is A Prepared Body If You Have A Scattered Mind?

Sometimes Drastic Change Requires Drastic Measures.

Do I Look Like I’ve Been Crying?’ I Say. ‘hmm.’ He Leans In Close, Narrowing His Eyes Like He’s Inspecting My Face. A Smile Tugs At The Corner Of His Mouth. Even Closer, So We Would Be Breathng The Same Air- If I Could Remember To Breathe. ‘no, Tris,’ He Says. A More Serious Look Replaces His Smile As He Adds, ‘you Look Tough As Nails.

Being Selfless Is Not That Different From Being Brave. It Is When You Are Selfless That You Are The Bravest.

It's What You Deserve To Hear," I Say Firmly, My Eyes Going Cloudy With Tears. "that You're Whole, That You're Worth Loving, That You're The Best Person I've Ever Known.

What You Deserve

Before We Sit Down, He Puts His Mouth Next To My Ear And Says, “i Like Your Hair That Way.

My Problem Might Be That Even If I Did Go Home, I Wouldn’t Belong There, Among People Who Give Without Thinking And Care Without Trying.

When Her Body First Hit The Net, All I Registered Was A Gray Blur. I Pulled Her Across It And Her Hand Was Small, But Warm, And Then She Stood Before Me, Short And Thin And Plain And In All Ways Unremarkable- Except That She Had Jumped First. The Stiff Had Jumped First. Even I Didn't Jump First. Her Eyes Were So Stern, So Insistent. Beautiful.

I Settle Into Their Pace. The Uniform Pounding Of Feet In My Ears And The Homogeneity Of The People Around Me Makes Me Believe That I Could Choose This. I Could Be Subsumed Into Abnegation’s Hive Mind, Projecting Always Outward.

We Share A Common Enemy, But Does That Make Us Friends?

It Seems Like The Rebellions Never Stop, In The City, In The Compound, Anywhere. There Are Just Breaths Between Them, And Foolishly, We Call Those Breaths “peace".

I Don't Really Control The Story. I Just Let It Go Where It Wants To Go. I Have No Idea What's Going To Happen In The End Or Who's Going To Live, So It's Kind Of Like Me Saying, "i Don't Know, Guys! Just Wait." That's What I'm Doing!

You Want Him To Walk?" Caleb Demands. "are You Insane?" "did I Shoot Him In The Leg?" I Say. "no. He Walks. Where Do We Go, Peter?

Someone Shouts, "enough!" And I Think Too Much And Nothing At All.

And Don't Pay Attention To Christina. Your Face Doesn't Look That Bad." He Smiles A Little. "i Mean, It Looks Good. It Always Looks Good. I Mean--you Look Brave. Dauntless." His Eyes Skirt Mine, And He Scratches The Back Of His Head. The Silence Grows Between Us. It Was A Nice Thing To Say, But He Acts Like It Means More Than Just Words. I Hope I Am Wrong. I Could Not Be Attracted To Al-- I Could Not Be Attracted To Anyone That Fragile. I Smile As Much As My Bruised Cheek Will Allow, Hoping That Will Diffuse The Tension.

Fine," He Says. "then I Love You.

What Did You Do, Memorize A Map Of The City For Fun?” Says Christina. “yes,” Says Will, Looking Puzzled. “didn’t You?

The Shouts Of Triumph Become Infectious, And I Lift My Voice To Join In, Running Toward My Teammates. Christina Holds The Flag Up High, And Everyone Clusters Around Her, Grabbing Her Arm To Lift The Flag Even Higher. I Can't Reach Her, So I Stand Off To The Side, Grinning. A Hand Touches My Shoulder. "well Done," Four Says Quietly.

Be Brave, Beatrice. I Love You.

I Do Trust You, Is What I Want To Say. But It Isn't True -- I Didn't Trust Him To Love Me Despite The Terrible Things I Had Done. I Don't Trust Anyone To Do That, But That Isn't His Problem; It's Mine.

I Know That Change Is Difficult, And Comes Slowly, And That It Is The Work Of Many Days Strung Together In A Long Line Until The Origin Of Them Is Forgotten.

I Feel Like Myself, Strong And Weak At Once - Allowed, At Least For A Little While, To Be Both.

I Love The Wikipedia Link Chain Because It Has Led Me Into Some Strange Articles. Wikipedia Is One Of My Favorites.

Because Even A Sliver Of Distance Between Us Is Infuriating.

You Sadistic Pansycake.

I Like To Think That Im Helping Them By Hating Them

What Do--" Tobias's Voice. Tobias! "oh My God. Oh--" "spare Me Your Blubbering, Okay? Peter Says. "she's Not Dead; She's Just Paralyzed. It'll Only Last For About A Minute. Now Get Ready To Run." I Don't Understand. How Does Peter Know? "let Me Carry Her," Tobias Says. "no. You're A Better Shot Than I Am. Take My Gun. I'll Carry Her.

I Was Born For Abegnation. I Was Planning On Leaving Dauntless, And Becoming Factionless. But Then I Met 'her', And...i Felt Like Maybe I Could Make Something More Of My Decision.

Can I Be Forgiven For All I've Done To Get Here? I Want To Be. I Can. I Believe It.

Out Of My Peripheral Vision, I See Four Shove The Door Open And Walk Out. Apparently This Fight Isn't Interesting Enough For Him. Or Maybe He's Going To Figure Out Why Everything's Spinning Like A Top, And I Don't Blame Him; I Want To Know The Answer Too.

Beatrice," She Says. "beatrice, We Have To Run." She Pulls My Arm Across Her Shoulders And Hauls Me To My Feet. She Is Dressed Like My Mother And She Looks Like My Mother, But She Is Holding A Gun, And The Determined Look In Her Eyes Is Unfamiliar To Me.

He Leans His Face Close To Mine And Wraps His Fingers Around My Chin. His Hand Smells Like Metal. When Was The Last Time He Held A Gun, Or A Knife?

Arrogance Is One Of The Flaws In The Erudite Heart -- I Know. It Is Often In Mine.

Do It Fast, You Pansycake.

She'll Have To Get Over It, Then. Are You Going To Let Her Drop Out Of Dauntless For A Stupid Reason Like Not Being Able To Walk?" Zeke Is Quiet For A Few Seconds. His Eyes Shift Over My Face, And He Squints, As If Weighing And Measuring Me. Then He Turns And Bends And Wraps His Arms Around Me. It's Been So Long Since Someone Hugged Me That I Stiffen. Then I Relax, And Let The Gesture Force Warmth Over My Body.

Sorry, Am I Being Rude?" She Asks. "i'm Used To Saying Whatever Is On My Mind. Mom Used To Say That Politeness Is Deception In Pretty Packaging

I Close My Eyes. I Don't Expect Four To Reassure Me, And He Makes No Effort To, But I Feel Better Standing Here Than I Did Out There Among The People Who Are My Friends, My Faction.

Yes," Marcus Says. "i Understand That You Are Concerned -- That You All Are Concerned. You Had Never Heard Of The Divergent A Week Ago, And Now All That You Know Is That They Are Immune To Something To Which You Are Susceptible, And That Is A Frightening Thing. But I Can Assure You That There Is Nothing To Be Afraid Of, As Far As We Are Concerned." As He Speaks, His Head Tilts And His Eyebrows Lift In Sympathy, And I Understand At Once Why Some People Like Him. He Makes You Feel That If You Just Placed Everything In His Hands, He Would Take Care Of It.

Some Things Are Hard To Let Go Of.

Looking Away Is Submissive. Looking [..] In The Eye Is A Challenge.

I Can't Tell Him I Need Him. I Can't Need Him, Period -- Or Really, We Can't Need Each Other, Because Who Knows How Long Either Of Us Will Last In This War?

Why Would The Factionless Have A High Divergent Population?" It Sounds Like She's Smirking. "obviously Those Who Can't Confine Themselves To A Particular Way Of Thinking Would Be Most Likely To Leave A Faction Or Fail Its Initiation, Right?

What's This About Flashing Underwear?" Says Uriah, Sidestepping A Bunk. "whatever It Is, I'm In.

Maybe It's A Little Depressing To Think That My Vision Of A Perfect World Is Actually So Messed Up, But I Think It Means That I Don't Really Understand What 'perfect' Is.

I Want To Cry Because Something Terrible Happened, And I Saw It, And I Could Not See A Way To Mend It.

It Isn't The Height That Scares Me - The Height Makes Me Feel Alive With Energy, Every Organ And Vessel And Muscle In My Body Singing At The Same Pitch. Then I Realize What It Is. It's Him. Something About Him Makes Me Feel Like I Am About To Fall. Or Turn To Liquid. Or Burst Into Flames.

Before I Chose Dauntless...i Felt Assured Of My Long Lifespan, If Nothing Else. Now There Are No Reassurances Except That Where I Go, I Go Because I Choose To.

To Me, When Someone Wrongs You, You Both Share The Burden Of That Wrongdoing - The Pain Of It Weighs On Both Of You. Forgiveness, Then, Means Choosing To Bear The Full Weight All By Yourself. Caleb's Betrayal Is Something We Both Carry, And Since He Did It, All I've Wanted Is For Him To Take Its Weight Away From Me. I Am Not Sure That I'm Capable Of Shouldering It All Myself - Not Sure That I Am Strong Enough, Or Good Enough.

He Told Me Once To Be Brave, And Though I Have Stood Still While Knives Spun Toward My Face And Jumped Off A Roof, I Never Thought I Would Need Bravery In The Small Moments Of My Life. I Do.

As A Teenager, I Put A Lot Of Pressure On Myself, And A Lot Of That, For Me, Was About Finding A Moral High Ground. As I've Grown Up, I've Decided To Abandon That Because It Made Me Judgmental And Also Stressed Me Out.

Moral High Ground

She Sighs, Then Breaks A Piece Off The Muffin In My Hand. 'hey. There Are Plenty More Just Five Feet To Your Right.' 'then You Shouldn't Be So Concerned About Losing Some Of Yours.' She Says, Grinning. 'fair Enough.

So This Is Where You Grew Up. Did You Like It Here? I Guess You Couldn't Have, If You Wanted To Leave.' Christina 'i Liked Some Things And Hated Some Things. And There Were Some Things I Didn't Know I Had Until I Lost Them.' Tris

His Absence Will Haunt Their Hallways, And He Will Be A Space They Can't Fill. And Then Time Will Pass, And The Hole Will Be Gone, Like When An Organ Is Removed And The Body's Fluids Flow Into The Space It Leaves. Humans Can't Tolerate Emptiness For Long.

That Dot Covers All The Places We've Ever Been. You Could Cut That Piece Of Land Out Of The Ground And Sing It Into This Ocean And No One Would Even Notice. I Feel That Fear Again, The Fear Of My Own Size. 'right. So?' 'so? So Everything I've Ever Worried About Or Said Or Done, How Can It Possibly Matter?' He Shakes His Head. 'it Doesn't.' 'of Course It Does,' I Say, 'all That Land Is Filled With People, Every One Of Them Different, And The Things They Do To Each Other Matter.

I Traded Cowardice For Cruelty; I Traded Weakness For Ferocity.

I Never Thought I Would Need Bravery In The Small Moments Of My Life. I Do.

I Just Wanted To Thank You' He Says, His Voice Low. 'a Group Of Scientists Told You That My Genes Were Damaged, That There Was Something Wrong With Me - They Showed You The Test Results That Proved It. And Even I Started To Believe It.' He Touches My Face, His Thumb Skimming My Cheekbone, And His Eyes Are On Mine, Intense And Insistent. 'you Never Believed It,' He Says 'not For A Second. You Always Insisted I Was... I Don't Know, Whole.

And I'm The Kind Of Person Who Does Not Let Inconsequential Things Like Boys And Near Death Experiences Stop Her.

You Know, Most Boys Would Enjoy Being Trapped In Close Quarters With A Girl." I Roll My Eyes. "not Claustrophobic People, Tris.

It Is Amazing How Pretending To Be In A Different Faction Changes Everything -- Even The Way I Walk. That Must Be Why It's So Strange That I Could Easily Belong In Three Of Them.

I Watch Her Blond Head Until It Disappears Around The Bend, And I Feel Bare, Like There's Nothing Left To Protect Me Against Pain. Her Absence Stings Worst Of All.

No Need To Continually Insist Upon Your Unshakable Masculinity.

The Fire, The Fire. It Rages Within, A Campfire And Then An Inferno, And My Body Is Its Fuel. I Feel It Racing Through Me, Eating Away At The Weight. There Is Nothing That Can Kill Me Now; I Am Powerful And Invincible And Eternal.

Well, I Already Know What Happened To My Face", I Say. "i Was There. Sort Of

Faction Before Blood.

I Suppose That Now Would Be The Time To Ask For Forgiveness For All The Things I've Done, But I'm Sure My List Would Never Be Complete. I Also Don't Believe That Whatever Comes After Life Depends On My Correctly Reciting A List Of My Transgressions...i Don't Believe That What Comes After Depends On Anything I Do At All.

Beatrice. We Should Think Of Our Family. But. But We Must Also Think Of Ourselves.

I Imagine The Wave Of Water Colliding With The Rock And Spilling Over The Tile Floor, Collecting Around My Shoes. Doing A Little At Once Can Fix Something, Eventually, But I Feel Like When You Believe That Something Is Truly A Problem, You Throw Everything You Have At It, Because You Just Can’t Help Yourself.

Fear Doesn't Shut You Down; It Wakes You Up. I've Seen It. It's Fascinating." He Releases Me But Doesn't Pull Away, His Hand Grazing My Jaw, My Neck. "sometimes I Just...want To See It Again. Want To See You Awake.

I Kiss Him As The Train Slides Into Unlit, Uncertain Land. I Kiss Him For As Long As I Want, For Longer Than I Should, Given That My Brother Sits Three Feet Away From Me.

You Won," Four Mutters. "stop." I Wipe The Sweat From My Forehead. He Stares At Me. His Eyes Are Too Wide; They Look Alarmed.

What?" I Ask. "i'm Developing A Theory." "and It Is?" She Picks Up Her Hamburger, Grins, And Says, "that You Have A Death Wish.

Writing Means Not Just Staring Ugliness In The Face, But Finding A Way To Embrace It.

Did You Ever Meet Someone Named Caleb?" I Say. 'caleb," Fernando Says. "yes, There Was A Caleb In My Initiate Class. Brilliant, But He Was... What's The Colloquial Term For It? A Suck-up." He Smirks.

He Smiles In My Memory. A Curled Lip. Straight Teeth. Light In His Eyes. Laughing, Teasing, More Alive In Memory Than I M In Reality. It Was Him Or Me. I Chose Me. But I Feel Dead Too.

Tris," Said Tobias. "i Love You

I Didn't Know That Idiocy Caused People To Just Start Spontaneously Bleeding From The Nose.

You Don't Have To Tell Me Everything Right Away, But I Have To Tell You Everything Right Away? Can't You See How Stupid That Is?

Tobias And Tris

I Love You" I Say. "i Love You, Too" He Says. "i'll See You Soon.

I Feel Myself Acting Like A Lunatic, But I Can't Stop. It Would Be Like Refusing To Breathe.

You're Afraid Of Heights,'i Say. 'how Do You Survive In The Dauntless Compound?' 'i Ignore My Fear,' He (four) Says. 'when I Make Decisions, I Pretend It Doesn't Exist.

You Were Afraid Of Shooting People?" "no," I Say. "i Was Afraid Of My Considerable Capacity To Kill." How Many Young Men Fear That There Is A Monster Inside Of Them?

I Don't See Any Elderly People In The Crowd. Are There Any Old Dauntless? Do They Not Last That Long, Or Are They Just Sent Away When They Can't Jump Off Moving Trains Anymore?

In 'insurgent' We Realise How Large The World Really Is

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