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I Always Say People Would Rather Be Nice Than Right. I Like To Be Nice Too, But Come On. People Frequently Ask Me, What Is My Definition Of Politically Correct. My Answer Is Always The Same: The Elevation Of Sensitivity Over Truth. People Would Rather Be Nice Than Right, Rather Be Sensitive Than True. Well, Being Nice And Sensitive Are Important, But They're Not More Important Than Being Right; They're Not More Important Than The Truth.

-Bill Maher

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I Always Say People

Bill Maher

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I Always Say People Would Rather Be Nice Than Right. I Like To Be Nice Too, But Come On. People Frequently Ask Me, What Is My Definition Of Politically Correct. My Answer Is Always The Same: The Elevation Of Sensitivity Over Truth. People Would Rather Be Nice Than Right, Rather Be Sensitive Than True. Well, Being Nice And Sensitive Are Important, But They're Not More Important Than Being Right; They're Not More Important Than The Truth.

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The Whole Dating Ritual Was Different When I Was A Kid. Girls Got Pinned, Not Nailed.

Cleavage Is To A Man What Power Is To A Woman.

Sarah Palin Said Perhaps The Most Irresponsible Thing I've Ever Heard Any Politician Say. She Said, 'the Only Thing That Stops A Bad Guy With A Nuke Is A Good Guy With A Nuke.' You Think She Realizes That Nuking Russia Might Not Be Good For Someone Who Can See Russia From Her House?

So Many Kids Are Fat Drug Addicts These Days, It's Almost As If Rush Limbaugh Had Puppies.

I'm Staying In A Strange Hotel. I Called Room Service For A Sandwich And They Sent Up Two Hookers.

This Is A Powerful Message From Our Government: We Will Not Be Intimidated By Bombs; We Will Not Be Intimidated By Poison; This Is America, If You're A Violent, Paranoid Lunatic, You Must Use A Gun!

The Thing I Don't Understand About Homosexuals Is, How Do They Decide Which One Is The One Who's Supposed To Pretend They Don't Want It?

African American Congressman Bobby Rush Wore A Hoodie On The Floor Of Congress To Make A Point This Week. And They Threw Him Out. They Said A Hoodie Is Too Scary For Congress. Too Scary? Have You Ever Looked Into Michele Bachmann's Eyes?

African American

False Hope Really Makes You Cynical.

They Told Us To Buy Duct Tape And Portable Radios So That If The World Does End, We Can All Listen To Rush Limbaugh Blame It On Clinton.

Let's Face It; God Has A Big Ego Problem. Why Do We Always Have To Worship Him?

I Don't Understand Why The Police Are Infallible. They Remind Me A Lot Of The Catholic Church.

But Isn't There Something Wrong When I'm The Only Guy In The Country That Got Fired For 9/11?

There's A New Ipad Out...people Are Going Nuts For This Thing...and, Today, Mitt Romney Said, 'it's A Flat Piece Of White Plastic. If You Can Love It, Why Not Me?'

In The Republican Party, Crazy Is A Constituency.

Why Is Monotheistic Faith Better Than Polytheistic? I Mean, Either You Believe - If You Believe In, Like, A Magic Person Who Can Do Magic Things, Why Is It Different - So Different If It's Superman Or The Fantastic Four?

The Electricity Is Back On In Baghdad. That Is A Very Climactic Moment In Any Country's Liberation, When The Lights Come Back On And You Get A Good Look At What You Looted.

If You Want To Get Rich With A Tax Free Enterprise That Sells Nothing, Start A Church.

Maybe Every Other American Movie Shouldn't Be Based On A Comic Book. Other Countries Will Think Americans Live In An Infantile Fantasy Land Where Reality Is Whatever We Say It Is And Every Problem Can Be Solved With Violence.

The Difference Between The Three Abrahamic Religions: Christianity - Mumbling To The Ceiling, Judaism - Mumbling To The Wall, Islam - Mumbling To The Floor.

I Was Watching Ashlee Simpson On Jay's Show Last Night... She Was Really Singing, And I Was Saying, 'bring Back The Lip Synch'... And It Struck Me That Ashlee Simpson Is A Lot Like George Bush - Because She Wouldn't Even Really Be In The Big Leagues If It Wasn't For Family Connections, And She's In Way Over Her Head. And She Doesn't Know What To Do. And She Blamed Her Band.

This Is Why Rational People - Anti-religionists - Must End Their Timidity And Come Out Of Their Closet And Assert Themselves.

Karl Rove Described Obama As "the Guy At The Country Club With The Beautiful Date, Holding A Martini, And Making Snide Comments About Everyone Who Passes By." Unlike George Bush, Who's The Guy At The Country Club Who Makes Snide Comments, And Then Passes Out. Now This Characterization, Of Course, Was Something Mr. Rove Just Completely Pulled Out Of His Bulbous, Gelatinous A$$, But Remember This Is America, A Land Where People Believe Anything They Hear.

Religion Is Defined As Belief In And Worship Of A Controlling Power And Atheism Is Precisely Not That.

The [libyan] Rebels This Week Kind Of Hinted To The United States That They Could Use A Little Help. Right. Like, America Would Just Blunder Around The Middle East Killing People Without All The Facts. That Doesn't Sound Like The America I Know.

New Rule: There Is No Devil, So Stop Blaming Your Screw-ups On Him. Last Week, One Of The Biggest Evangelical Leaders In America, The Reverend Ted Haggard, Was Outed For Drugs And Extramarital Gay Sex With A Male Prostitute. Or As Fox News Reported It, 'john Kerry Hates Our Troops'.

They're Talking About Banning Cigarette Smoking Now In Any Place That's Used By Ten Or More People In A Week, Which, I Guess, Means That Madonna Can't Even Smoke In Bed.

Why Is The Ama For 'obamacare'? If This Is Going To Hurt Doctors, Why Are They For 'obamacare'?

Rand Paul And Chris Christie Both Said Vaccinations Should Be A Choice, Not A Government Mandate. Because When Have Republicans Ever Told People What They Could Do With Their Own Bodies?

If It Weren't For Acid, You Might Not Have An Ipod, And You Definitely Would Not Have Some Of The Best Music In Your Ipod.

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