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You're A Car, But Most Of All, What You Are, What You've Become, Is A Mate. And That's What Makes A Car Special. That's What Makes A Car Great. You Start To Think Of It As A Person. You Start To Love It.

-Jeremy Clarkson

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You're A Car, But

Jeremy Clarkson

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You're A Car, But Most Of All, What You Are, What You've Become, Is A Mate. And That's What Makes A Car Special. That's What Makes A Car Great. You Start To Think Of It As A Person. You Start To Love It.

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I Don't Often Agree With The Rspca As I Believe It Is An Animal's Duty To Be On My Plate At Supper Time.

If A Football Official Were To Call For A Slow-motion Replay Every Time Didier Drogba Fell Over, Each Match Would Last About Six Weeks.

Now We Get Quite A Lot Of Complaints That We Don't Feature Enough Affordable Cars On The Show So We'll Kick Off Tonight With The Cheapest Ferrari Of Them All!

I Think It's A Good Idea To Tie Peter Mandelson To A Van. Such An Act Would Be Cruel And Barbaric And Inhuman. But It Would At Least Cheer Everyone Up A Bit.

When We Went To Canada [with Top Gear], I Was Staggered About How Many People Got In Touch ... Before We Finish With The Grand Tour, We'll Definitely Be Appearing In Canada At Some Point. Nothing Is More Certain Than That.

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Because Drug Dealers Shoot Each Other In London, Norfolk Farmers Can't Have Guns To Defend Their Homes. I Mean, No One Wants A Gun - Except At 4am When They Hear A Strange Sound In The Kitchen.

There Are Shantytowns In South Africa That Are Built Better Than Renaults!

Selling Through The Internet Seems To Be A Very Good Idea. There Are A Million Areas That We Can Go To.

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Does Anyone Really Imagine For A Moment That My Wife Gives Two Stuffs About Global Warming? She Certainly Did Not Appear To Be All That Bothered On Thursday Evening When, During The Great Carbon-saving Switch-off, I Ran Round The House Furiously Turning On Every Light, Hair Dryer, Dishwasher And Toaster.

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Supercars Are Supposed To Run Over Arthur Scargill And Then Run Over Him Again For Good Measure. They Are Designed To Melt Ice Caps, Kill The Poor, Poison The Water Table, Destroy The Ozone Layer, Decimate Indigenous Wildlife, Recapture The Falkland Islands And Turn The Entire Third World Into A Huge Uninhabitable Desert, All That Before They Nicked All The Oil In The World.

The Suzuki Wagon R Should Be Avoided Like Unprotected Sex With An Ethiopian Transvestite

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Speed Has Never Killed Anyone. Suddenly Becoming Stationary, That's What Gets You.

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I’d Like To Consider Ferrari As A Scaled Down Version Of God.

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Some Say That He Has No Understanding Of Clouds, And That His Ear Wax Tastes Like Turkish Delight. All We Know Is He’s Called The Stig.

When I Was 16, I Wanted To Look Like Lord Byron. It's Not Really A Haircut So Much As A Hair-not-cut, But I've Never Changed It. It's A Bit Byron, A Bit Don Juan Demarco And Other Things That I Aspire To Be.

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This Is Perfect For India Because Everyone Who Comes Here Gets The Trots.

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.. International Hand Of Freindship. A Cigarette

I'm A Horse Of A Man!

You're A Car, But Most Of All, What You Are, What You've Become, Is A Mate. And That's What Makes A Car Special. That's What Makes A Car Great. You Start To Think Of It As A Person. You Start To Love It.

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If You Go Through The Pearly Gates Backwards In A Fireball, That's A Cool Way To Die!

Ambition Is A Very Dangerous Thing Because Either You Achieve It And Your Life Ends Prematurely, Or You Don't, In Which Case Your Life Is A Constant Source Of Disappointment. You Must Never Have Ambition.

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