We're Still Expected To Color Within The Lines Of Accepted Femininity, And Women Who Step Out Of Those Lines Are Usually Attacked, Whether Verbally Or Physically.

-Libba Bray

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We're Still Expected To

Libba Bray

We're Still Expected To Color Within The Lines Of Accepted Femininity, And Women Who Step Out Of Those Lines Are Usually Attacked, Whether Verbally Or Physically.

Topic

Color

Lines

Steps

More From Libba Bray

Did They Find Something Wanting In You, Gemma, At The Party? You Didn’t Speak Too Freely Or Behave…strangely?” I Grew Claws And Bayed At The Moon. I Confessed That I Eat The Hearts Of Small Children. I Told Them I Like The French.

Children

Party

Heart

I Don't Have Time To Feel Sorry For Myself. I've Got To Think.

Sorry

Thinking

Rewards

The Dull Pain Of Truth Weights My Soul, Pulling It Under. I Am Left Hopelessly Awake.

Pain

Soul

Weight

Writers Are Also Sort Of Like Vultures, But With Fewer Ethics.

Ethics

Vulture

Fewer

But Sons Are A Different Matter To A Man. More A Duty Than An Indulgence.

Son

Men

Different

I Hear They Feed You In Sing Sing,” Evie Muttered. “three Squares A Day.” “evangeline,” Will Said With A Sigh. “charity Begins At Home.” “so Does Mental Illness.

Home

Squares

Doe

I’m From The Health Department. You’ve Heard Of Typhoid Mary? This Fella’s Got Enough Typhoid To Start His Own Colony.

Enough

Typhoid

Mary

The Corporation Would Like To Apologize For The Preceding Pages. Of Course, It's Not All Right For Girls To Behave This Way. Sexuality Is Not Meant To Be This Way - An Honest, Consensual Expression In Which A Girl Might Take An Active Role When She Feels Good And Ready And Not One Minute Before. No. Sexual Desire Is Meant To Sell Soap. And Cars. And Beer. And Religion.

Girl

Beer

Expression

Heaven's Brightest And Best-loved Angel, Who Was Cast Out For Inspiring A Rebellion Against God. Having Lost Heaven, Lucifer And His Rebel Angels Vowed To Continue Fighting Here On Earth." "i Don't Understand Why He Had To Fight. He Was Already In Heaven." "true. But He Wasn't Content To Serve. He Wanted More." "he Had All He Could Ask For, Didn't He?" Ann Asks. "exactly." Miss Moore States. "he Had To Ask. He Was Dependent Upon Someone Else's Whim. It's A Terrible Thing To Have No Power Of One's Own. To Be Denied.

Angel

Fighting

Missing

Jeez, Someone Needs To Push The Reset Button On This Planet.

Reset Button

Buttons

Needs

I've Had So Many Bikini Waxes, I Cry Every Time I See A Popsicle Stick.

Girl

Bikinis

Sticks

Will Was Making A Speech, Something About Having Been Young And Careless Once, The Sort Of Thing Old-timers Said When They Issued A Deathblow, As If They Thought Their Sanctimonious Ramblings Disguised As Empathy Would Be Welcomed, But Evie Was Only Half Listening.

Empathy

Listening

Would Be

Felicity And I Watch The Dancers Moving As One. They Spin About Like The Earth On It's Axis, Enduring The Dark, Waiting For The Sun.

Moving

Dark

Axes

There Are Always Rebels And Radicals, I Suppose,' Mccleethy Allows. 'those Who Live On The Fringes Of Society. But What Do They Contribute To The Society Itself? They Reap Its Rewards Without Experiencing Its Costs. No. I Submit That Loyal, Hardworking Citizens Who Push Aside Their Own Selfish Desires For The Good Of The Whole Are The Backbone Of The World. What If We All Decided To Run Off And Live Freely Without Thought Or Care For Society's Rules? Our Civilization Would Crumble. There Is A Joy In Duty And A Security In Knowing One's Place...it Is The Only Way.

Running

Selfish

Civilization

No, I Call. Come Back. I'm Here, He Says. But I Can't See. It's Too Bright. You Can't Hold Back The Light, Gemma. I'm Here. Trust Me.

Light

Trust Me

I Can

Why Is It That Some Secrets Can Drown You While Some Pull You Close To Others In A Way You Never Want To Lose?

Secret

Want

Way

Pastoralia By George Saunders. Possibly My Favorite Book. Its One Of The Weirdest Books Ive Ever Read. If Monty Python And Thomas Pynchon Had A Love Child, And It Was Raised By Frank Zappa On A Weird Commune, That Would Be This Book.

Children

Book

Python

When I Dream, I Dream Of Him. For Several Nights Now He’s Come To Me, Waving From A Distant Shore As If He’s Been Waiting Patiently For Me To Arrive. He Doesn’t Utter A Word, But His Smile Says Everything: I’ve Missed You.

Good Night

Dream

Waiting

Eve Didn't Choose To Eat The Apple. She Was Tempted By The Serpent." "yes," I Argue, Thoughts Coming Out Half-formed. "but...she Didn't Have To Take A Bite. She Chose To.

Apples

Half

Arguing

Evie Didn’t Mind Yelling, But She Hated Feeling Judged. It Got Under Her Skin And Made Her Feel Small And Ugly And Unfixable.

Yelling

Feelings

Mind

Cash Or Check?” He Said Cheekily. Even The Dullest Ohio Girls Knew That Bit Of Lingo: Kiss Now Or Kiss Later? “bank’s Closed, Pal.

Girl

Kissing

Ohio

I Am No Longer Content To Be The Scared, Obedient Schoolgirl. Who Are You, A Stranger, To Tell Me What I Can And Cannot Do?

Scared

Stranger

I Can

The Library Card Is A Passport To Wonders And Miracles, Glimpses Into Other Lives, Religions, Experiences, The Hopes And Dreams And Strivings Of All Human Beings, And It Is This Passport That Opens Our Eyes And Hearts To The World Beyond Our Front Doors, That Is One Of Our Best Hopes Against Tyranny, Xenophobia, Hopelessness, Despair, Anarchy, And Ignorance.

Dream

Xenophobia

Book

All Things Are Possible.

Wall

All Things

And Just As I Begin To Believe That All Is Well, There Is Some Subtle Change In The Light. The Room Takes Its True Shape. I Fight To Go Back To That Blissful Ignorance, But It Is Too Late. The Dull Pain Of Truth Weights My Soul, Pulling It Under. I Am Left Hopelessly Awake.

Pain

Believe

Ignorance

I Hate This Place,” Tiara Whimpered. “it’s Super Creepy. Like A Haunted Chuck E. Cheese’s Where The Games All Want To Kill You And You Never Get Your Pizza.

Hate

Chuck E Cheese

Games

Really? And What Curse Befalls The Adams Of The World?" Ann Opens Her Mouth And, Presumably Thinking Of Nothing To Say, Closes It Again. It Is Felicity Who Answers, Eyes Steely. "they Are Weak To Temptation. And We Are Their Temptresses.

Eye

Thinking

Temptation

I Wouldn’t Expect You To Get It, Daisy. You Don’t Look At Anything Besides Photoplay—and Even Then Somebody’s Gotta Explain The Pictures To You.” Daisy’s Mouth Hung Open In Outrage. “well, I Never!” “yeah, That’s What You Tell All Your Fellas, But The Rest Of Us Aren’t Buying It. Go Away, Now, Daisy. Shoo, Little Fly!

Going Away

Looks

Mouths

There Is An Ancient Tribal Proverb I Once Heard In India. It Says That Before We Can See Properly We Must First Shed Our Tears To Clear The Way.

Tears

India

Way

If This Were A Movie, I Would Bust A Secret Move So Fierce The Entire Place Would Be Razed To The Ground. I'd Finish With Something Snappy Like "and Don't Forget My Soda, Punk" While I Strolled Off Into The Night.

Moving

Night

Secret

I Had A Friend Who Said, "you Don't Have An Internal Critic. You Have An Internal Sadist."

Said

Critics

Internals

Theta Blew Out Another Plume Of Cigarette Smoke. “not Interested. Love’s Messy, Kiddo. Let Those Other Girls Get Moony-eyed And Goofy. Me? I Got Plans.

Girl

Cigarette Smoke

Goofy

It Isn't That We Do What We Want. It's That We're Allowed To Want At All.

Want

They Have Money And Position And Ann Has None.it's Amazing How Often You Can Be Right As Long As You Have Those Two Things Working In Your Favor.

Two

Long

Favors

He Took Comfort In The Neon Signs, The Wild Strands Of Jazz Creeping Out Of Clubs Whenever Happy Swells Of People Pushed Through The Doors In Their Finery.

Doors

People

Comfort

Things Aren't Good Or Bad In And Of Themselves. It's What We Do With Them That Makes Them So.

What Frightens You? What Makes The Hair On Your Arms Rise, Your Palms Sweat, The Breath Catch In Your Chest Like A Wild Thing Caged? Is It The Dark? A Fleeting Memory Of A Bedtime Story, Ghosts And Goblins And Witches Hiding In The Shadows? Is It The Way The Wind Picks Up Just Before A Storm, The Hint Of Wet In The Air That Makes You Want To Scurry Home To The Safety Of Your Fire? Or Is It Something Deeper, Something Much More Frightening, A Monster Deep Inside That You've Glimpsed Only In Pieces, The Vast Unknown Of Your Own Soul Where Secrets Gather With A Terrible Power, The Dark Inside?

Memories

Home

Dark

Helloooo." Miss Ohio Rolled Her Eyes. "i'm From The Buckeye State. We Are Serious About Our Tailgating Parties. I Can Turn Anything Into A Grill.

Party

Eye

Ohio

Agent Jones Held Sinjin’s Face In His Hands. “i’m Going To Make Balloon Animals. People Need Balloon Animals.” “how Right You Are, Strange Delusional Man,” Sinjin Said.

Men

Animal

Hands

Free The Snow Globes!

Snow

Globes

Going Bovine

Oh, I Didn't Think It Wise To Hide It. Might Not Be Able To Find It Again," I Say, Cheerily. "it's Sitting In Plain View On Your Chair In The Great Hall. I Do Hope That Was The Best Place For It.

Wise

Thinking

Views

Ahem. Dear Jesus," Taylor Intoned More Fervently. "we Just Want To Thank You For Gettin' Us Here Safe ---" There Was A Loud, Gurgling Groan. Somebody Shouted, "oh My Gosh! Miss Delaware Just Died!" "--- For Gettin Some Of Us Here Safe," Taylor Continued. "and We Pray That, As We Are Fine, Upstandin', Law-abidin' Girls Who Represent The Best Of The Best, You Will Protect Us From Harm And Keep Us Safe Until We Are Rescued And Can Tell Our Story To People Magazine. Amen." - "beauty Queens

Girl

Jesus

Queens

We're Like Pretty Horses, And Just As On Horses, They Mean To Put Blinders On Us So We Can't Look Left Or Right But Only Straight Ahead Where They Would Lead.

Horse

Mean

Looks

In Them, She Saw The Sham Of Her Life Laid Out Like A Book, The Foolish Belief That She, That Anyone, Could Escape The Consequences Of This World, Could Flee From Death. That Was The Deceit. The True Serpent In The Garden.

Book

Garden

Deceit

There's A Lot About Discovering Who You Are And How Difficult That Is. And It Never Stops.

Difficult

Discovering

Discovering Who You Are

I Shan't Ever Understand Your Willingness To Lie Down And Die," Felicity Bars. "if You Won't At Least Try To Fight, I Have No Sympathy For You.

Lying

Fighting

Trying

The Rules Of Magic, My Dear, Are Best Not Discusses. For Once We Understand The Illusion, We No Longer Believe It.

Believe

Magic

Illusion

Write Like It Matters, And It Will.

Writing

Matter

People Will Believe Anything If It Means They Can Go On With Their Lives And Not Have To Think Too Hard About It.

Believe

Mean

Thinking

I Stare At The Pile Of Discarded Remnants And Think Of My Mother. Did She Touch That Pillar There? Does Her Scent Still Linger In A Fragment Of Glass Or A Splinter Of Wood? A Terrible Emptiness Settles Into My Chest. No Matter How Much I Go About Living, There Are Always Small Reminders That Make The Loss Fresh Again.

Mother

Loss

Thinking

Our Mouths And Bodies Speak For Us In A New Language As The Trees Shake Loose A Rain Of Petals That Stick To Our Slickness Like Skins We Will Wear Forever. And Just Like That, I Am Changed.

Rain

Tree

Forever

Sitting In My Favorite Coffeehouse With A New Notebook And A Hot Cup Of Java Is My Idea Of Heaven.

Notebook

Ideas

Heaven

Next Time We See You, You’ll Be On Trial For Some Ingenious Crime!” Dottie Said With A Laugh. Evie Grinned. “just As Long As They Know My Name.

Names

Long

Laughing

I've Never Done Acid, Finding It Hard To Go Willingly To A Place That Could Be Frightening, Hellish, And Totally Beyond My Control. A Place Much Like High School.

School

Done

Acid

Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Judged.

Judging

Judged

Because There's Nothing Wrong With You... That Can't Be Fixed.

Murder Mysteries

Fixed

A Guy's Gotta Live, You Know, Gotta Make His Way And Find His Meaning In Life And Love, And To Do That He Needs Coffee, He Needs Coffee And Coffee And Coffee.

Life And Love

Coffee

Guy

May I Suggest That You All Read? And Often. Believe Me, It's Nice To Have Something To Talk About Other Than The Weather And The Queen's Health. Your Mind Is Not A Cage. It's A Garden. And It Requires Cultivating.

Queens

Nice

Believe

They Would Place Their Hands Together Inside The Circle So That They Could Walk In Each Other's Dreams. It Forged A Bond That Could Not Be Broken. The Circle Represents Love In Eternity. For There Is No Beginning And No End.

Dream

Hands

Circles

- So My Own Sister Will Not Promote Me? Speaking Of Which, Weren't You Supposed To Find Me A Beautiful Future Wife With A Small Fortune? Have You Had Any Success On That Front? - Yes - I Have Warned Them All.

Beautiful

Wife

Fortune

We Create The Illusions We Need To Go On. And One Day, When They No Longer Dazzle Or Comfort, We Tear Them Down, Brick By Glittering Brick, Until We Are Left With Nothing But The Bright Light Of Honesty. The Light Is Liberating. Necessary. Terrifying. We Stand Naked And Emptied Before It. And When It Is Too Much For Our Eyes To Take, We Build A New Illusion To Shield Us From Its Relentless Truth.

Honesty

Eye

Light

Agent Jones Switched To The Big Screen And A Grainy Video Of Momo Sitting At His Enormous Desk, A Swivel-hipped Elvis Clock Ticking Behind His Bewigged Head. 'death To The Capitalist Pigs! Death To Your Cinnamon Bun-smelling Malls! Death To Your Power Walking And Automatic Car Windows And I'm With Stupid T-shirts! The Republic Of Chacha Will Never Bend To Your Side-of-fries -drive -through-please-oh-would-you-like-ketchup-with-that Corruption! Momo B. Chacha Defies You And All You Stand For, And One Day, You Will Crumble Into The Sea And We Will Pick Up The Pieces And Make Them Into Sand Art.

Art

Stupid

Pigs

How Do You Invent A Religion?” Evie Asked. Will Looked Over The Top Of His Spectacles. “you Say, ‘god Told Me The Following,’ And Then Wait For People To Sign Up.

People

Waiting

Following

He Said To Tell You To Remember Your Heart In All Things, That It Is Where Your Honor And Your Destiny Will Be Found. Does It Mean Anything To You?' It Is Something He Would Say From Time To Time-that The Eye Could Be Misled, But That The Heart Was True.

Heart

Mean

Eye

The World Is Only As Fair As You Can Make It. Takes A Lot Of Fight. A Lot Of Fight. But If You Stay In Here, In Your Little Cave, That's One Less Fighter On The Side Of Fair.

Fighting

Caves

World

Didn't You Have Any Sadistic Nannies Who Told You These Tales To Keep You Quiet And Well Behaved At Night? Heavens, What's To Become Of The Empire If Governesses Have Lost Their Touch For Scaring The Wits Out Of Their Girls?

Girl

Night

Heaven

She Loved Attention. It Was Like A Glass Of The Best Champagne—bubbly And Intoxicating—and As With Champagne, She Always Wanted More Of It. Still, She Didn’t Want To Seem Like An Easy Mark. “if You Must Know, I’ve Come To Join A Convent,” Evie Said, Testing Him.

Glasses

Attention

Want

There Are Times When I Wish I Could Go Back And Change The Course Of My Life. Make Different Choices...but The Past Cannot Be Changed, And We Carry Our Choices With Us, Forward, Into The Unknown. We Can Only Move On. Do You Remember That I Told You That At Spence?

Moving

Past

Choices

I'm Like Everyone Else In This Stupid, Bloody, Amazing World. I'm Flawed. Impossibly So. But Hopeful. I'm Still Me.

Stupid

Hopeful

World

Think: Who Has Vans, Huh? Soccer Moms And Serial Killers.

Soccer

Mom

Thinking

I Am For Hockey. I Find I Should Like To Hit Something With A Stick. -gemma Doyle Trilogy

Hockey

Sticks

Should

She's No Beauty, Mate

Mates

Gonzo Narrows His Eyes. 'how Often Do You Clean That Thing?' 'every Night,' The Waitress Answers. Her Smile Is Strained. 'that's It? Do You Know How Long It Takes For Listeria To Grow Under Those Hot Lamps, Even With Ice?' Here We Go. 'it Can Happen In Just Five Hours. Five Hours And You've Got The Salad Bar Of Death!' The Waitress Looks Confused. 'from Listerine?

Confused

Eye

Night

There Is No Greater Power On This Earth Than Story.” Will Paced The Length Of The Room. “people Think Boundaries And Borders Build Nations. Nonsense—words Do. Beliefs, Declarations, Constitutions—words. Stories. Myths. Lies. Promises. History.” Will Grabbed The Sheaf Of Newspaper Clippings He Kept In A Stack On His Desk. “this, And These”—he Gestured To The Library’s Teeming Shelves—“they’re A Testament To The Country’s Rich Supernatural History.

Country

Lying

Thinking

You Are Absolute Angels Of The First Order. If I Were Pope, I’d Canonize You.” “the Pope Would Probably Love To Turn A Cannon On You!

Angel

Order

Firsts

This Is How The Fire Starts. This Is How We Burn.

Fire

When I Dream, I Dream Of Him.

Dream

Might. Is There Any Opiate More Powerful Than That Word?

Powerful

Opiates

Might

They Kept The Lie Going, And The People Loved It.

Lying

People

Did You Hear? You Are Free." Yessss. Choice. It Is A Fine Thing. And I Choose To Take You Back, Most High.

Choices

Fine Things

Fine

J.t Woodland, Known As “the Cute One” In The Corporation’s Seventh-grade Boy Band, Boyz Will B Boyz. Due To The Success Of Their Triple-platinum Hit, “let Me Shave Your Legs Tonight, Girl,” Boyz Will B Boyz Ruled The Charts For A Solid Eleven Months Before Hitting Puberty And Losing Ground To Hot Vampire Boyz.

Cute

Girl

Boys

If God Has Nothing Better To Do Than Punish Schoolgirls For A Bit Of Tomfoolery, Then I've No Use For God.

Use

Bits

Ifs

I've Never Been In Love. I Will Die Without Knowing What It Feels Like To Need To See One Person's Face When You Go To Sleep At Night, To Crave Seeing It When You Wake Up. I Wish I Knew.

Sleep

Night

Knowing

Why Do Girls Always Feel Like They Have To Apologize For Giving An Opinion Or Taking Up Space In The World? Have You Ever Noticed That?" Nicole Asked. "you Go On Websites And Some Girl Leaves A Post And If It's Longer Than Three Sentences Or She's Expressing Her Thoughts About Some Topic, She Usually Ends With, 'sorry For The Rant' Or 'that May Be Dumb, But That's What I Think.

Girl

Sorry

Thinking

She Holds Up A Finger. "i'm Getting To It. Don't Rush A Girl In The Middle Of Her Exposition.

Girl

Middle

Fingers

You're Quite Tall.' Just What A Girl Wants To Be Reminded Of.

Girl

Want

Tall

Meraa Mitra Yahaan Aaiye," He Murmurs. I Understand Only A Little Hindi, Enough To Know What He Has Said: Come Here, My Friend. I've Never Known A Braver Girl," He Says.

Girl

Littles

Hindi

It's As If I've Inherited A Skin I Cannot Quite Fit, And So I Walk About Constantly Pulling And And Tugging, Pinning And Pruning, Trying Desperately To Fill It Out, Hoping That No One Will Look At Me Struggling And Say, 'that One There- She's A Fraud, Look How She Doesn't Fit At All.

Struggle

Trying

Skins

Please, I'm A Transgender Former Boy-bander. You Think I Don't Know How To Defend Myself?

Boys

Thinking

Transgender

I’m Not Interested In Being Polite. It’s False.

Not Interested

Polite

Being Polite

There Are Times When One Friend Requires The Blind Faith Of Another.

Blind

Blind Faith

One Friend

What Took You So Long?” Will Asked When Evie Came Panting Into The Room. He And Jericho Had Assembled A Stack Of Books, Which They Were Tucking Into Will’s Attaché Case. “i Walked To Jerusalem For The Bible. I Knew You’d Want An Original,” Evie Snapped.

Book

Long

Jerusalem

Careful There, Poet. I Might Start To Believe You.

Believe

Might

Poet

Brought To You By The Corporation: In Your Homes And In Your Pants.

Home

Corporations

Pants

My Personal Motto Is: Wwwwd?: What Would Wonder Woman Do?

Wonder Woman

Wonder

Motto

Im A Techno Moron. I Need Help Just To Plug In My Video Camera.

Cameras

Needs

Video

I Should Never Be Left Alone With My Mind For Too Long.

Long

Insanity

Mind

In This Man’s Smile Was All The Unfairness Of The World In Its Thuggish Seduction. “just Come With Me. We’ll Take Care Of You.” “no, You Won’t.” Taylor Stroked The Man’s Cheek. She Reached Her Arms Up To Cradle The Back Of His Head And, With The Skill Of A Champion, She Broke His Neck. Then She Dragged Him Into The Bushes, Took His Gun And Walkie-talkie, And Kept Moving.

Moving

Gun

Men

What Happened To The Winner" Adina Asked. "she Tripped." "and The First Runner-up?" Miss Michigan Cracked Her Knuckles. "she Tripped, Too.

Missing

Michigan

Knuckles

It Was A Kiss Small In Its Ministrations But Epic In Its Feeling.

Kissing

Epic

Feelings

What Did I Do To Make Mommy Leave?” “you Didn’t Do Anything. This Isn’t Your Fault.” “then Why?” She’d Wailed. “i Don’t Know,” Her Daddy Had Said, And He Looked So Sad. “it Isn’t Fair!” “no, It Isn’t, Baby. Not By A Mile. The World’s Only As Fair As You Can Make It. Takes A Lot Of Fight. A Lot Of Fight. But If You Stay In Here, In Your Own Little Cave, That’s One Less Fighter On The Side Of Fair.

Baby

Fighting

Daddy

You Know What Else Is Hot?" Said A Nameless Blonde As She Put Her Arm Around The One Black Girl. "what?" "bisexuals." "totally. Well, Not Like Real Bisexuals Who Are Just Sort Of Your Everyday People, But, Like, The Kind Of Bisexuals You See In Magazines Wearing Nothing But Body Paint And Kissing Both Boys And Girls To Promote A New Single." "totally, Totally Hot.

Girl

Real

Kissing

She Hadn’t Meant To Get Trapped In A Conversation. That Was The Trouble With Offering Help To Old People.

Offering

People

Helping

We All Walk In A Land Of Dreams. For What Are We But Atoms And Hope, A Handful Of Stardust And Sinew? We Are Weary Travelers Trying To Find Our Way Home On A Road That Never Ends. Am I A Part Of Your Dream? Or Are You But A Part Of Mine?

Dream

Home

Land

Who But The Mad Would Choose To Keep On Living? In The End, Aren't We All Just A Little Crazy?

Crazy

Mad

Littles

Just Once, She'd Like To Be The Exciting One, The Girl Somebody Wanted.

Girl

Exciting

Wanted

Hi. I’m From Arkansas, The Cantaloupe State. And Tonight, I Hope You Will Hold My Melons Close To Your Heart And Vote Me Your Miss Teen Dream.

Dream

Heart

Missing

She Is The Elephant’s Eyebrows,” Evie Whispered Appreciatively. “those Jewels! How Her Neck Must Ache.” “that’s Why Bayer Makes Aspirin,” Mabel Whispered Back, And Evie Smiled, Knowing That Even A Socialist Wasn’t Immune To The Dazzle Of A Movie Star.

Stars

Knowing

Jewels

Travel Opens Your Mind As Few Other Things Do. It Is Its Own Form Of Hypnotism, And I Am Forever Under Its Spell

Travel

Forever

Mind

You Are Working Up To Mr. Fantastic Fiction Levels Of Zombie Expert, Which Is Like Playing Guitar Hero On Some Level That Actually Melts The Guitar Controller, Burning Your Fingers With Searing Hot Plastic Till You Scream In Pain. Only With Words. And Zombies.

Pain

Hero

Guitar

There Are No Safe Choices. Only Other Choices.

Choices

Safe

Everyone Seems To Want More Form Me. I Am A Thoroughly Disappointing Girl Around. I Shall Wear A Scarlet 'd' Upon My Bosom For All To See So That They Will Know Not To Raise Their Expectations.

Girl

Expectations

Want

In A World Beyond This One, That River Goes On Singing Sweetly, Enchanting Us With What We Want To Hear, Shaping What We Need To See In Order To Keep Going. In Those Waters, All Disappointments Are Forgotten, Our Mistakes Forgiven. Gazing Into Them, We See A Strong Father. A Loving Mother. Warm Rooms Where We Are Sheltered, Adored, Wanted. And The Uncertainty Of Our Futures Is Nothing More Than The Fog Of Breath On A Windowpane.

Mother

Strong

Disappointment

When You Peeled Back The Skin, You Were Dealing With Bone And Muscle, Blood And Nerve Endings. It Was All The Same. She Liked The Beautiful Logic Of The Circulatory System, The Elegance Of The Neurological, And The Fierce Warrior Spirit Of The Heart. The Body Had Rules And It Had Quirks.

Beautiful

Heart

Warrior

Evie Replied With An Eye-roll. “do You Think You Can Manage To Not Steal Anything While I’m Gone?” “the Only Thing I’m Trying To Steal Is Your Heart, Doll.” Sam Smirked. “you’re Not That Talented A Thief, Sam Lloyd.

Heart

Eye

Thinking

She Bestowed The Blessing Of A Wild Girl's Lips.

Girl

Blessing

Lips

The Sun Has Blessed You," Sarita Used To Say. "look How He Has Left His Kisses On Your Face For All To See And Be Jealous." "the Sun Loves You More," I Said, Rubbing My Hands Over Her Dry Arms, The Color Of An Aged Wine Gourd, And She Laughed. But This Is Not India And We Are Not Prized For Our Freckles Here. The Sun Is Not Allowed To Show His Love.

Blessed

Love You

Jealous

All The Small, Simple, Conscious Acts Of Living A Sudden Defense Against The Dying We Do Every Day.

Simple

Dying

Defense

Evie Hadn’t Always Felt That Way. For A Year After James Had Died, She’d Cupped His Half-dollar Pendant Between Her Pressed Palms And Prayed Fervently For A Miracle, For A Telegram That Would Say Good News! It Was A Terrible Mistake, And Private James Xavier O’neill Has Been Found, Safe, In A Farmhouse In France. But No Such Telegram Ever Arrived, And Whatever Possible Faith Might Have Bloomed In Evie Withered And Died. Now She Saw It As Just Another Advertisement For A Life That Belonged To A Previous Generation And Held No Meaning For Hers.

Mistake

Years

Miracle

Simon, Would You Still Care For Me If You Discovered I Was Not Who I Say I Am?" What Do You Mean?" I Mean Would You Still Care For Me, No Matter What You Came To Know?" What A Thing To Ponder. I Don't Know What To Say." The Answer Is No. He Does Not Need To Say It. With A Sigh, Simon Digs At The Fire With The Iron Poker. Bits Of The Charred Log Fall Away, Revealing The Angry Insides. They Flare Orange For A Moment, Then Quiet Down Again. After Three Tries, He Gives Up. I'm Afraid This Fire's Had It." I Can See A Few Embers Remaining. "no, I Think Not. If..." He Sighs, And It Says Everything.

Giving Up

Fall

Mean

When She Can't Bring Me To Heal With Scolding, She Bends Me To Shape With Guilt.

Family

Home

Guilt

We All Do Things We Desperately Wish We Could Undo. Those Regrets Just Become Part Of Who We Are, Along With Everything Else. To Spend Time Trying To Change That, Well, It's Like Chasing Clouds.

Regret

Clouds

Trying

Wanna Rock You, Girl, With A Butterfly Tunic. / No, I'm Not Gay, I'm Just Your Emo Enuch. / Gonna Smile Real Shy, Won't Cop A Feel, / 'cause I'm Your Virgin Crush, Your Supersafe Deal. / Let Those Other Guys Keep Sexing. / You And Me, We Be Texting / 'bout Unicorns And Rainbows And Our Perfect Love. / Girl, We Fit Together Like A Hand In A Glove. / Now I Don't Mean That Nasty, Tell Your Mum Don't Get Mad. / I Even Wrote 'you're Awesome' On Your Maxi Pads.

Girl

Crush

Emo

In The End, I Take My Shoes Off And Stick My Feet In, Letting The Lukewarm Water Lick At My Ankles. It Feels Good, And Not Just Because I’m Stoned. I Make A Mental Note To Add This To Dulcie’s List Of Things Worth Living For. For Some Reason, I Keep Seeing Her Rolling Her Eyes At Me, That Big, Goofy Grin Stretching Her Face Like Silly Putty. On My Private List, I Add Her Smile. She Doesn’t Have To Know.

Silly

Eye

Shoes

You Couldn't Be Perfect Enough To Keep The World From Betraying You.

Perfect

World

Enough

Clothing Left On The Bed Unfolded. Books Stained With Coffee Spots. Tabs Not Paid Until The Last Possible Second. Boys Kissed And Then Forgotten In A Week’s Time.

Coffee

Book

Boys

The Man In The Shop Peered Disapprovingly At Evie Through The Glass. She Pumped Her Arms And Legs Up And Down In Imitation Of A Marching Band, Gave The Man A Salute, And Continued Her Meandering Walk To The Museum.

Men

Museums

Glasses

She Was Tired Of Being Told How It Was By This Generation, Who’d Botched Things So Badly. They’d Sold Their Children A Pack Of Lies: God And Country. Love Your Parents. All Is Fair. And Then They’d Sent Those Boys, Her Brother, Off To Fight A Great Monster Of A War That Maimed And Killed And Destroyed Whatever Was Inside Them. Still They Lied, Expecting Her To Mouth The Words And Play Along. Well, She Wouldn’t. She Knew Now That The World Was A Long Way From Fair. She Knew The Monsters Were Real.

Life

Country

Brother

My Cholera's Acting Up Again.

Acting

Cholera

Please Do Not Strain Yourself, Miss Doyle. I Won't Have My Girls Going Cross-eyed In The Name Of Art.

Girl

Art

Names

You Want To Know What Pain Is? Try Running Out Of Advil When You've Got A Category Five Period. I've Had Cramps That Would Make Grown Men Beg For A Bullet Between The Eyes." - Jennifer, "beauty Queens

Running

Queens

Pain

No One Asks How Or What I Am Doing. They Could Not Care Less. We’re All Looking Glasses, We Girls, Existing Only To Reflect Their Images Back To Them As They’d Like To Be Seen. Hollow Vessels Of Girls To Be Rinsed Of Our Own Ambitions, Wants, And Opinions, Just Waiting To Be Filled With The Cool, Tepid Water Of Gracious Compliance. A Fissure Forms In The Vessel. I’m Cracking Open.

Girl

Ambition

Glasses

I Can See His Pain, See It In The Way He Runs His Fingers Through His Hair, Over And Over, And I Understand What It Costs Him To Hide It All.

Running

Pain

Hair

I Have Done What They Expected Of Me. I Have Curtsied For My Queen And Made My Debut. This Is What I Have Anticipated Eagerly For Years. So Why Do I Feel So Unsatisfied? Everyone Is Merry. They Haven't A Care In The World. And Perhaps That Is It. How Terrible It Is To Have No Cares, No Longings. I Do Not Fit. I Feel Too Deeply And Want Too Much.

Queens

Years

Done

Who The Heck Is Don Quick-oats?

Oats

They See Her Differently Now, As Somebody. And Isn't That What Everyone Wants? To Be Seen?

Want

Adina Appealed To The Sky. "we Asked For Rescue And You Sent Us Incompetent Rockstar Pirates With A Broken Ship And Perfect Abs?" "thank You, God," Petra Said.

Sky

Broken

Perfect

- 'music Opens Your Soul, Makes You Ready.' - 'ready For What?' - He Smiles Big. 'exactly.

Soul

Bigs

Ready

I Am A Jumble Of Passions, Misgivings, And Wants. It Seems That I Am Always In A State Of Wishing And Rarely In A State Of Contentment.

Passion

Wish

Contentment

This Is Going To Make Such A Great Story: How I Nursed A Pirate Back To Health And My Love Saved Him," Miss Ohio Said With A Contented Sigh. "and Then We Can Have Our Own Reality Show About Our Relationship." - "beauty Queens

Queens

Reality

Ohio

It Is A Giggle Full Of High Spirits And Merry Mischief, Proof That We Never Lose Our Girlish Selves, No Matter What Sort Of Women We Become.

Self

Matter

Spirit

The Desperation Meeting The Silence With Its Unmasked Wish.

Silence

Wish

Desperation

Discord Need Not Be An Impediment. Differences Can Bring Strength.

Differences

Needs

Discord

Memphis Found His Smile. 'you Know Me, Sir. I Don't Wear Worry.

Worry

Memphis

His Smile

Naughty John, Naughty John, Does His Work With His Apron On. Cuts Your Throat And Takes Your Bones, Sells 'em Off For A Coupla Stones.

Cutting

Naughty

Doe

I Want To Ask Him If It’s Possible That A Girl Can Be Born Unlovable, Or Does She Just Become That Way?

Girl

Doe

Want

Everyone's Dying. A Little, Every Day. Make It Count.

Dying

Littles

Make It Count

Oh, Hello," Dr. M Says, Shaking Balder's Hand. "wonderful Costume. I'm A Bit Of A Role Player Myself On The Weekends. Tell Me, Where Did You Get The Helmet?" It Was Forged In The North, Blessed By The Hands Of Odin, Given To Me By My Mother, Frigg," Balder Answers. Lovely. I Got Mine On The Internet.

Mother

Blessed

Weekend

It's Always Darkest Before The Ultimate Sparkle.

Sparkle

Ultimate

What Makes A Girl A Girl? What Makes A Guy A Guy? Do You Have To Be What They Want You To Be? Or Do You Stop And Listen To That Voice Inside You? I Know Who I Am. I'm Petra West. And I'm A Girl. You Want Me To Sleep Somewhere Else, Fine. Whatever. But I'm Not Going To Pretend To Be Somebody I'm Not. I've Done Enough Of That.

Girl

Sleep

Somewhere Else

Feast For The Fisherman, The Ultimate Emo Band. Said To Be Sold With A Complimentary Prescription For Antidepressants And A Free Flatiron.

Emo

Band

Fisherman

And Now I Understand That Truth Casts A Spell Of Its Own, One I'm Not Sure Of How To Hold On To, Though I'm Desperate To Try.

Trying

Desperate

Not Sure

No One Can Live In The Light All The Time.

Light

Chiaroscuro

Women Who Have Power Are Always Feared.

So, Now I've Been To See A Drug Counselor Who Told Me I Need To Lay Off The Drugs And Talk About My Feelings, And A Shrink Who Heard What I Had To Say And Immediately Put Me On Drugs.

Drug

Feelings

Needs

I Changed The World; The World Changed Me. Everything You Do Comes Back To You. When You Affect A Situation, You Are Also Affected.

World

Changed

Situation

Sometimes I See Things, I Think. Out Of The Corner Of My Eye, Taunting Me, And Then It’s Gone. And Dreams. Such Horrible Dreams. What If Something Terrible Happened To Me? What If I Am Damaged?" The Rain Is A Cool Kiss On My Sleeve As I Link My Arm With Hers. "we’re All Damaged Somehow.

Dream

Rain

Eye

Beggin' Your Pardon, Miss, But I Was Told You Be The One To Help Me Cross On To The Next World." "who Told You This?" His Eyes Widen. "a Fearsome Creature With A Head Full Of Snakes!" "you Musn't Fear Her," I Say, Taking The Man's Hand And Leading His Toward The River. "she's As Tame As A Pussycat. She'd Probably Lick Your Hand Given The Chance." "didn't Seem Harmless," He Whispers, Shuddering. "yes, Well, Things Are Not Always As They Appear, Sir, And We Must Learn To Judge For Ourselves.

Eye

Men

Hands

Or Perhaps It Is Some Combination Of Spirit And Desire, Love And Hope, Some Alchemy That We Each Possess And Can Put To Use, If We First Know Where To Look Without Flinching.

Desire Love

Looks

Use

But If We Are To Remain A Great Empire, We Must Have A Greater Understanding Of The Hearts And Minds Of Others.

Heart

Understanding

Mind

He Wanted To Hit Something Or Someone. He Wanted To Burn Up The Whole World, Heal It, And Burn It Down Again.

World

Heal

Wanted

I'm A Librarian, Not An Oracle.

Oracles

Librarian

...dreams Were Dreams And Reality Was Reality And She Felt People Were Better Off Understanding The Difference.

Dream

Reality

Differences

Goodbye," I Whisper At Last, When It No Longer Matters And There Is No One To Hear It But The Window.

Goodbye

Matter

Lasts

...i Do Have To Wonder What Sort Of Childhood The Grimm Brothers Endured. They Are Not A Merry Bunch Of Storytellers, What With Their Children Roasted By Witches, Maidens Poisoned By Old Crones, And Whatnot.

Brother

Children

Childhood

In Every End, There Is Also A Beginning.

Ends

If There Was One Truth Evie Had Learned In Her Short Life, It Was That Forgiveness Was Easier To Seek Than Permission. She Didn’t Plan To Ask For Either One.

Short Life

Easier

Permission

The Glow Dies Down, And She's Standing At The End Of My Bed--the One Who's Been Following Me Around Leaving Feather Messages. I Take In The Torn Fishnets, Plaid Mini-kilt, Shiny, Riveted Breastplate With Leather Straps At The Sides And A Worn Great Temolo Decal Near The Left Shoulder. Her Wings Are A Crazy Black-and-white-checkered Pattern, Like They've Been Spray-painted At A Body Shop To Look Like Hipster Sneakers.

Hipster

Crazy

Black And White

People Have A Habit Of Inventing Fictions They Will Believe Wholeheartedly In Order To Ignore The Truth They Cannot Accept.

Believe

Order

People

People Aren't Always What You Want Them To Be

People

Want

What You Want

Without Further Warning, The Sky Opens Up And Cries.

Sky

Warning

Cry

Evie Was So Nervous That She Downed Her Cocktail In Two Stiff Swigs, Then Refilled Her Glass. Henry Arched An Eyebrow. “a Pro, I See.” “what Else Is There To Do In Ohio?

Glasses

Ohio

Eyebrows

And When It Comes, Her Kiss Is Like Something Not So Much Felt As Found.

Kissing

Found

Like Something

Taylor Clapped Three Times For Attention. "ladies! Ladies! My Stars! That's Enough. Now. We All Know Miss Arkansas's Girls Are Fake, Miss Ohio's Easier Than Making Cereal, And Miss Montana's Dress Is Something My Blind Meemaw Would Wear To Bingo Night." - "beauty Queens

Girl

Stars

Queens

The Police Have Asked For My Help. There's Been A Murder." "a Murder! Oh, My. Let Me Just Change My Shoes," Evie Said Excitedly. "it Won't Be A Minute.

Shoes

Police

Helping

Beauty, Grace, And Charm My Foot. It's A School For Sadists With Good Tea-serving Skills.

School

Skills

Feet

I Hate High Heels. Walking In High Heels For Eight Hours A Day Should Be Forbidden By The Geneva Convention.

Hate

Eight

High Heels

Felicity Ignores Us. She Walks Out To Them, An Apparition In White And Blue Velvet, Her Head Held High As They Stare In Awe At Her, The Goddess. I Don't Know Yet What Power Feels Like. But This Is Surely What It Looks Like, And I Think I'm Beginning To Understand Why Those Ancient Women Had To Hide In Caves. Why Our Parents And Suitors Want Us To Behave Properly And Predictably. It's Not That They Want To Protect Us; It's That They Fear Us.

Thinking

White

Blue

She Was Chosen,' Mae Insists. No, You're Wrong,' I Say. 'she Was Only A Girl.'... She Was Gone For Some Time. You Were The Only Force That Kept Her From Turning Completely. That's Magic. Perhaps The Most Powerful I've Seen.' -in Response To Felicity's Love For Pippa Keeping Her From Turning Into A Winterland Creature.

Girl

Powerful

Magic

They Swoon Over Tom, Who Preens For Them, Bowing, Which Sets Them To Blushing And Giggling. God Help Us All.

Helping

Blushing

God Help Us

A Gentle Breeze Catches In The Branches Then And I Hear It, Soft And Low, A Murmured Prayer--gem-ma, Gem-ma--and Then The Leaves Bend Down And Trail Delicate Fingers Across My Cold Cheeks.

Prayer

Branches

Down And

It Keeps Her Purity Vacum-sealed To Preserve Its Freshness For Her Future Husband.

Husband

Purity

Freshness

Beneath The Skin, There Is Fear. Pain. Remorse. Yearning. Desire. A Fierce Longing For Power. All Of This. We Are Joined. It Is As If We Live In The Center Of A Great Storm. Around Us The World Of The Realms Revolves Like A Giant Kaleidoscope, Images Refracted Again And Again. So Many Worlds! So Much To Know.

Pain

Storm

Desire

Yes, Go On. Leave. You're Always Coming And Going. The Rest Of Us Are Stuck Here. Do You Think He'd Still Love You If He Knew Who You Are? He Doesn't Really Care—only When It Suits Him.

Love You

Thinking

Goes On

Greetings, Ax Murderer! I Was Just Wondering How You Like Your Eggs?

Eggs

Wonder

Murderer

Instead, I Try To Adjust To The Dawn, Letting The Tears Fall Where They May, Because It Is Morning; It Is Morning And There Is So Much To See.

Morning

Fall

Tears

She Shrieks Above The Din. "if You Wish A Battle, I Shall Give It. I Am The Last Of My Kind. I Shall Not Lie Down Without A Fight.

Lying

Fighting

Giving

What If Evil Doesn't Really Exist? What If Evil Is Something Dreamed Up By Man, And There Is Nothing To Struggle Against Except Out Own Limitations? The Constant Battle Between Our Will, Our Desires, And Our Choices?

Struggle

Men

Evil

There's No Such Thing As Nothing. In Every Nothing, There's A Something. In Fact, There Could Be Everything!

Facts

I'm Sorry, Gemma. But We Can't Live In The Light All Of The Time. You Have To Take Whatever Light You Can Hold Into The Dark With You.

Sorry

Dark

Hard Times

I Changed My Mind. I Don’t Want To Be An Inveshtigative Journalist Anymore. I Want To Be A Professional Rum Drinker.” “there Are People Who Do That,” Duff Said. He’d Barely Sipped His Rum. “really? What Do You Call Them?” “alcoholics.

People

Mind

Want

She Wished She Were As Inconsequential As The Ghosts In Her Dreams.

Dream

Ghost

Inconsequential

The Mere Suggestion Of Fame And Fortune Casts A Glamour All Its Own. It Is Rather Alarming How Quickly People Will Turn Someone Else's Fiction Into Fact In Order To Support Their Own Fictions Of Themselves.

Order

People

Support

Discomfortwear™, Shapewear Designed To Eliminate Rills, Ripples, And Muffin Tops. In Some Cases Known To Eliminate Circulation And Breathing. If You’re Not Uncomfortable, It’s Not Discomfortwear™.

Breathing

Muffins

Cases

Any Book That Can Help You Survive The Slings And Arrows Of Adolescence Is A Book To Love For Life; 'the Catcher In The Rye' Did Just That, And I Still Do Love It.

Book

Love Life

Arrows

Pippa's Laugh Is Bitter, Tinged With Tears. 'ha! Why Do Girls Think Being Beautiful Will Solve Every Problem? Being Beautiful Just Creates Problems. It's A Misery. I Wish I Were Someone Else.

Beautiful

Girl

Thinking

Does My New Feminism Make Me Look Fat?

Feminism

Doe

Looks

To Those Who Will See, The World Waits.

Waiting

World

I Must Remember To Forgive Myself. Because There's An Awful Lot Of Gray To Work With. No One Can Live In The Light All The Time."-a Great And Terrible Beauty

Light

Forgiving

Awful

She Knew What It Was To Wait For Someone Who Would Never Come Home. She Knew That Grief, Like A Scar, Faded But Never Really Went Away.

Grief

Home

Waiting

Understanding Quotes: Their Essence and Application

Quotes, or quotations, are powerful tools in communication, encapsulating ideas, emotions, and wisdom in concise expressions. They serve various purposes across different contexts, from academic writing to everyday conversation.

1. Defining Quotes

A quote is a repetition of someone else's statement or thoughts. It can be a direct replication of words spoken or written by another individual, often used to support arguments, provide evidence, or convey profound insights.

2. The Importance of Quotes

2.1. Enhancing Credibility

Incorporating quotes from authoritative sources can bolster the credibility of your work. By referencing experts or primary sources, you demonstrate thorough research and a solid foundation for your arguments.

2.2. Providing Evidence

Quotes serve as concrete evidence to support claims. In academic and professional writing, they validate points made, offering readers a basis to trust the information presented.

2.3. Conveying Emotions and Perspectives

Quotes can encapsulate emotions and perspectives succinctly. They allow writers to express complex feelings or viewpoints through the words of others, often more eloquently than paraphrasing.

3. Types of Quotes

3.1. Direct Quotes

Direct quotes involve copying the exact words from a source, enclosed in quotation marks. They are used when the original wording is significant or particularly well-expressed.

3.2. Indirect Quotes (Paraphrasing)

Indirect quotes restate the original message in your own words. While not enclosed in quotation marks, they still require proper attribution to the original source.

3.3. Block Quotes

Block quotes are lengthy direct quotations, formatted as a separate block of text. They are typically used for quotes exceeding a certain length, varying by citation style. For instance, in APA style, quotes longer than 40 words are formatted as block quotes.

4. Proper Usage of Quotes

4.1. Contextual Relevance

Ensure that the quote you choose is relevant to the topic and adds value to your content. Avoid inserting quotes solely for decorative purposes.

4.2. Integration into Your Writing

Seamlessly integrate quotes into your writing. Introduce them appropriately and follow up with analysis or commentary to connect them to your main points.

4.3. Attribution and Citation

Always attribute quotes to their original authors and provide proper citations according to the required style guide (APA, MLA, Chicago, etc.).

5. Common Mistakes to Avoid

5.1. Overusing Quotes

Relying too heavily on quotes can overshadow your voice. Use them sparingly to support your arguments, not replace them.

5.2. Lack of Analysis

Presenting a quote without analysis or explanation can leave readers questioning its relevance. Always follow up with your interpretation or discussion.

5.3. Misquoting or Taking Out of Context

Ensure that quotes are accurate and not taken out of context, as this can mislead readers and undermine your credibility.

6. Quotes in Different Contexts

6.1. Academic Writing

In academic writing, quotes are used to support arguments, provide evidence, and engage with existing literature. Proper citation is crucial to avoid plagiarism.

6.2. Journalism

Journalists use quotes to provide firsthand accounts, add authenticity, and present multiple perspectives within a story.

6.3. Literature and Creative Writing

In literature, quotes can be used to convey character voices, themes, and stylistic elements. They enrich narratives and provide depth to storytelling.

7. Punctuation and Formatting

Understanding the correct punctuation and formatting of quotes is essential:

Quotation Marks: Always enclose direct quotes within quotation marks.

Punctuation Placement: In American English, periods and commas are placed inside quotation marks, while colons and semicolons are placed outside.

Block Quotes: For longer quotes, format them as block quotes without quotation marks, and indent the entire block.

8. Ethical Considerations

Ethical use of quotes involves accurate representation, proper attribution, and respect for intellectual property. Misuse can lead to plagiarism, which carries serious academic and professional consequences.

9. Tools for Managing Quotes

Utilize tools like citation generators and plagiarism checkers to manage quotes effectively. These tools help ensure proper formatting and originality in your writing.

Conclusion

Quotes are invaluable in enriching content, providing evidence, and conveying complex ideas succinctly. When used appropriately, they enhance the quality and credibility of your writing. Always ensure relevance, proper integration, and ethical usage to maximize their impact.

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