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There's The Usual Suspects In There, Green Day And The Clash And The Smiths, Yeah, But There's Also Ella And Frank, Even Dino, Some Curtis Mayfield And Minor Threat And Dusty Springfield And Belle & Sebastian, And As I Flip Through His Musical Life, Getting To Know His Tastes, I Must Acknowledge That Not Only Am I Not Frigid, But I Also May Be Multi-orgasmic.

-Rachel Cohn

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There's The Usual Suspects

Rachel Cohn

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There's The Usual Suspects In There, Green Day And The Clash And The Smiths, Yeah, But There's Also Ella And Frank, Even Dino, Some Curtis Mayfield And Minor Threat And Dusty Springfield And Belle & Sebastian, And As I Flip Through His Musical Life, Getting To Know His Tastes, I Must Acknowledge That Not Only Am I Not Frigid, But I Also May Be Multi-orgasmic.

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Teenage Boys Cannot Be Trusted. Their Intentions Are Not Pure.

She Doesn't Want The Boy Causing The Distinction Between "love" And "in Love

When I Was A Teenager, The Number One Book I Was Most Obsessed With Was 'gone With The Wind.

We Believe In The Wrong Things. That's What Frustrates Me The Most. Not The Lack Of Belief, But The Belief In The Wrong Things. You Want Meaning? Well, The Meanings Are Out There. We're Just So Damn Good At Reading Them Wrong.

I Particularly Loved The Adjective Bookish, Which I Found Other People Used About As Often As Ramrod Or Chum Or Teetotaler.

Listen To Me: I Never Married Because I Was Too Easily Bored. It's An Awful, Self-defeating Trait To Have. It's Much Better To Be Too Easily Interested.

Tal Told Me He Loved Me, And Told Me And Told Me, But You Don't Tell Someone That And Then Tell Them They're Not Experienced Enough In Bed And Should Read A Book Or Something To Learn, Or They Should Try Wearing Deep-red Lipstick And Tight Skirts To Look Hot Like Their Best Friend Once In A While. If Tal Hadn't Lied To Me When He Said He Loved Me, I Might Not Be Without A Future Right Now, A Sucker Who Was So Chickenshit She Allowed Herself To Believe A False Dream From A False God. I'm Not Sure I Ever Even Liked Tal, Much Less Loved Him.

Do You Want To Guess What's In Here?" I Asked Dash. "i Think I've Got It Figured Out Already. There's A New Supply Of Red Notebooks In There, And You Want Us To Fill Them In With Clues About The Works Of, Say, Nicholas Sparks." "who?" I Asked. Please, No More Broody Poets. I Couldn't Keep Up. "you Don't Know Who Nicholas Sparks Is?" Dash Asked. I Shook My Head. "please Don't Ever Find Out," He Said.

I Love Snow For The Same Reason I Love Christmas: It Brings People Together While Time Stands Still. Cozy Couples Lazily Meandered The Streets And Children Trudged Sleds And Chased Snowballs. No One Seemed To Be In A Rush To Experience Anything Other Than The Glory Of The Day, With Each Other, Whenever And However It Happened.

With What You Were Talking About Before. The World Being Broken. Maybe It Isn't That We're Supposed To Find The Pieces And Put Them Back Together. Maybe We're The Pieces." Nick Says. "maybe," Nick Says, "what We're Supposed To Do Is Come Together. That's How We Stop The Breaking.

No--when The Rain Falls You Just Let It Fall And You Grin Like A Madman And You Dance With It, Because If You Can Make Yourself Happy In The Rain Then You're Doing Pretty Alright In Life. (nick, Page 156)

The Reward Is In The Risk. You Can’t Stay Hidden Inside Grandpa’s Overprotective Cloak Forever. You’ve Seemed Like You Needed To Grow Out Of That For A While. Mom And Dad Going Away, And The Red Notebook, These Things Just Helped. Now It’s Up To You To

There Is No Such Thing As A Soulmate...and Who Would Want There To Be? I Don't Want Half Of A Shared Soul. I Want My Own Damn Soul.

I Want To Believe There Is A Somebody Out There For Me. I Want To Believe That I Exist To Be There For That Somebody.

You Should Never Wish For Wishful Thinking.

Wishful Thinking

Therefore. Ergo. Erg. Argh. Ugh.

Wow. I Feel Like In This Riot Of People, I Have Been Kicked In The Stomach, But By The Giddy Police. Forget About The Need For Oxygen. My Mouth Wants To Go Back To The Place It Just Left.

Drosophila,” I Said, Remembering The Word. “what?” Lily Asked. “why Do Girls Always Fall For Guys With The At Ention Span Of Drosophila?” “what?” “fruit Flies. Guys With The Attention Span Of Fruit Flies.” “because They’re Hot?” “this,” I Told Her, “is Not The Time For Being Truthful.

Hope And Belief. I'd Always Wanted Hope, But Never Believed That I Could Have Such An Adventure On My Own. That I Could Own It. And Love It. But It Happened.

I Walked Inside Macy’s And Faced The Pathetic Spectacle Of A Department Store Full Of Shoppers, None Of Whom Were Shopping For Themselves. Without The Instant Gratification Of A Self-aimed Purchase, Everyone Walked Around In The Tactical Stupor Of The Financially Obligated.

Bruises Mapped My Body From Bumping Into Tables And Tripping Over Curbs While Walking With A Book In My Hand, My Eyes Focused On The Pages Instead Of The Live Space Around Me.

All This Hoping For Nothing-or Someone-that's Maybe Hopeless

The Mosh Pit Will Reveal All The Answers. The Mosh Pit Never Lies. -norah, Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist

From A Distance, A Clone's Luminous Eyes Are Meant To Draw In Humans And Make Them Feel Safe. Up Close, The Eyes Appear Hollow. Because Of That, Humans Tend Not To Look Into Our Eyes Too Closely, Which I've Been Told Is Socially Preferable, As Eyes Without Souls Behind Them Can Be Frightening.

Prayer Or Not, I Want To Believe That, Despite All Evidence To The Contrary, It Is Possible For Anyone To Find That One Special Person. That Person To Spend Christmas With Or Grow Old With Or Just To Take A Nice Silly Walk In Central Park With. Somebody Who Wouldn't Judge Another For The Prepositions They Dangle, Or Their Run-on Sentences, And Who In Turn Wouldn't Be Judged For The Snobbery Of Their Language Etymology Inclinations.

We All Just Took The Bookstore At Its Word, Because If You Couldn't Trust A Bookstore, What Could You Trust?

I Figured Being A Bed Salesman Was A Job Of Biblically Bad Paradox. I Mean, Here He Was, Forced To Stand For Eight Or Nine Hours A Day, And The Whole Time He’s Surrounded By Beds. And Not Only That, He’s Surrounded By Shoppers Who See The Beds And Can’t Help But Think, Man, I’d Love To Lie Down On That Bed For A Second. So Not Only Does He Have To Stop Himself From Lying Down, But He Has To Stop Everyone Else From Doing It, Too. I Knew If I Were Him, I Would Be Desperate For Human Company.

Perhaps It's Not That I'm Frigid-- It's That Once I Decide I Like A Guy, I Turn Into A Raging Idiot, Unfit For Public Appearances.

Cinderella Was Such A Dork. She Left Behind Her Glass Slipper At The Ball And Then Went Right Back To Her Step-monster's House. It Seems To Me She Should Have Worn The Glass Slipper Always, To Make Herself Easier To Find. I Always Hoped That After The Prince Found Cinderella And They Rode Away In Their Magnificent Carriage, After A Few Miles She Turned To Him And Said, "could You Drop Me Off Down The Road Please? Now That I've Finally Escaped My Life Of Horrific Abuse, I'd Like To See Something Of The World, You Know?... I'll Catch Back Up With You Later, Prince, Once I've Found My Own Way.

What I’m Sorry About Is Not Being A Tipsy Idiot When You Found Me. I’m Sorry About That, Obviously, But More Sorry That My Stupidity Caused Us To Lose A Great Opportunity. I Don’t Imagine You Would Have Met Me And Fallen Crazy In Love With Me, But I Would Like To Think That If You’d Had A Chance To Meet Me Under Different Circumstances, Something Just As Nice Could Have Happened. We Could Have Become Friends.

But I Know The Difference. Everyone Else Is A Ghost. I Exist Here Alone, Stranded By Choice. Deserted.

I've Given Him More Mixed Signals Than A Dyslexic Morse Code Operator.

In A Field, I Am The Absence Of Field. In A Crowd, I Am The Absence Of Crowd. In A Dream, I Am The Absence Of Dream. But I Don't Want To Live As An Absence. I Move To Keep Things Whole. Because Sometimes I Feel Drunk On Positivity. Sometimes I Feel Amazement At The Tangle Of Words And Lives, And I Want To Be A Part Of That Tangle.

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It's The Great Male Fantasy-all It Takes Is One Dance To Know That She's The One. All It Takes Is The Sound Of Her Song From The Tower, Or A Look At Her Sleeping Face. And Right Away You Know-this Is The Girl In Your Head, Sleeping Or Dancing Or Singing In Front Of You. Yes, Girls Want Princes, But Boys Want Their Princesses Just As Much.

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The Complexity Embedded In The Different Levels Of Meaning That Go Along With The Words "i Love You" Ought To Be A Whole Mindfuck Of A Video Game

But, You See, That's The Luxury Of Being A Lout - You Get To Be Selective About When You Care And When You Don't. The Rest Of Us Get Stuck When Your Care Goes Shallow.

I've Always Been Sort Of A Closet Sci-fi Geek.

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I Can Be A Badass Dj When I Want, But I Am Also An Insufferable Music Snob.

I Thought About The Bigger Picture Of My Life, And About The People—and Particularly The Guys—i Would Encounter During My Lifetime. How Would I Ever Know When That Moment Was Right, When Expectation Met Anticipation And Formed … Connection?

How Would I Ever Know When That Moment Was Right, When Expectation Met Anticipation And Formed...connection?

I'm Told There's No Going Back. So I'm Choosing Forward.

Because I Withered Under The Glare Of An Actual Invitation, I Was A Firm Believer In Preventive Prevarication--in Other Words, Lying Early In Order To Free Myself Later On.

This Must Be Part Of Mother Nature's Master Plan—making These Boys So Irresistibly Cute, In Such A Naughty Way, That The Purity Of Their Intentions Becomes Irrelevant.

She Told Me If I Clean All The Ashes Out Of The Grate, Then I’ll Be Able To Help My Sisters Get Ready For The Bal.” “it’s Christmas, Dashiel. Can’t You Give That Atitude A Rest?” “merry Christmas, Dad. And Thanks For The Presents.” “what Presents?” “i’m Sorry—those Were All From Mom, Weren’t They?

I'm Thinking I Would Like To Dance In The Rain With This Person. I Would Like To Lie Next To Him In The Dark And Watch Him Breathe And Watch Him Sleep And Wonder What He's Dreaming About And Not Get An Inferiority Complex If The Dreams Aren't About Me.

We Are The Ones Who Take This Thing Called Music And Line It Up With This Thing Called Time. We Are The Ticking, We Are The Pulsing, We Are Underneath Every Part Of This Moment. And By Making The Moment Our Own, We Are Rendering It Timeless. There Is No Audience. There Are No Instruments. There Are Only Bodies And Thoughts And Murmurs And Looks. It's The Concert Rush To End All Concert Rushes, Because This Is What Matters. When The Heart Races, This Is What It's Racing Towards.

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[s]he Leans Into This Guy And Rocks Her Head Like I’m Making This Music For Her, When If I Could, I Would Take It All Away And Give Her As Much Silence As She’s Given Me Pain.

I'm Liking That I Can Throw Any Kind Of Sentence At Her Without Worrying It's Too Out There.

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Why Should I Tell You?" He Asked, With No Small Amount Of Petulance. "if You Tell Me, I Will Leave You Alone," I Said. "and If You Don't Tell Me, I'm Going To Grab The Nearest Ghostwritten James Patterson Romance Novel And I Am Going To Follow You Through This Store Reading It Out Loud Until You Relent." Now I Could See The Fright Beneath The Defiance.

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People Come To New York To Be Different, But I Go To Starbucks To Be The Same.

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One Of The Failures Of Cellular Communication Is That Tiredness Often Comes Across As Sadness.

Wold Domination Is Exhausting And Cliche. People Ought To Just Focus On Being Individual Responsible Citizens Of The Earth Instead Of Assholes.

Better To End This Dream Before It Becomes A Nightmare.

Can We Try To Be Wise With Each Other For A Very Long Time?

Lou's Such An Old Punk He Was Around When The Ramones Were Junkie Hustlers First And Musicians Second, When Punk Meant Something Other Than A Mass-marketing Concept Designed To Help The Bridge-and-tunnel Crowd Feel Cool.

The Humans Create Life, And Senselessly Cause Death. For Nothing.

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He's Not My Step Brother Technically, So I Think It's Okay That I Kissed Him Once.

Well What's In Your Amazonian Hope Chest?

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So Much Is Happening And Yet Nothing At All.

There's The Usual Suspects In There, Green Day And The Clash And The Smiths, Yeah, But There's Also Ella And Frank, Even Dino, Some Curtis Mayfield And Minor Threat And Dusty Springfield And Belle & Sebastian, And As I Flip Through His Musical Life, Getting To Know His Tastes, I Must Acknowledge That Not Only Am I Not Frigid, But I Also May Be Multi-orgasmic.

Nick And I Could Become Goodwill Ambassadors For The City Now That The Porno Shops On 42nd Street Are Gone. Must Make Mental Note To Contact Mayor.

I Could Become A Nun Even If I Am A Non-believer. I'll Learn To Fake It Like Nick Did With Me. I Will Minister The Gospel Of Compassion And Kindness And Please, Always Use A Condom, From Famine-stricken Nations To War-torn Dead Zones. It's Possible I Might Become A Nun Who Kisses Other Nuns.

Everyone On This Island Wants Something Kept Quiet. I Want To Roar

I Deciced If I Were Ever To Get Into Booze And Women, My Line Would Be, 'excuse Me, Madam, But I Would Really Love To Bed And Muss You. . . . Are You Perchance Free This Evening?

But She's Not, And I Am Left To Wonder On My Own: How Does This Work, The Getting To Know A New Guy Without Revealing Too Much Desperation For His Undivided Attention?

The Handwriting Was A Girl’s. I Mean, You Can Tell. That Enchanted Cursive.

How Come Princesses Always Have Some Huge Flaw That Can Cause Their Downfall?

I Don't Know Why I'm Saying Any Of This, Except That It's The Truth." -nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist

So This Chocolate Princess. Her Knight In Shining Armor Is The Easter Bunny.

I Am Bigger Than The Box I'm In.

Do You Still Kill Gerbils?

Why Do You Lie" I Ask Her. "to Block The Truth." Fair Enough. Naomi Goes On. "where Did We Get It In Our Heads That We Need Truth All The Time? Sometimes Lies Are Nice, You Know? You Don't Have To Know The Truth All The Time. It's Too Exhausting.

Things Change All The Time, Mostly In Little Ways.

There. I've Said Everything I Wanted To Say Without Actually Having To Use The Words "please Stay

I Mean, Like Most Guys, You Carry Around This Girl In Your Head, Who Is Exactly Who You Want Her To Be. The Person You Think You Will Love The Most. And Every Girl You Are With Gets Measured Against This Girl In Your Head.

Somewhere Between A Friend And Acquaintance—a Frequaintance, As It Were.

So He's Worth A Second Shot? The More Apt Question, My Dear, Is: Are You?

I Wanted To Talk To Someone. But Who? It’s Moments Like This, When You Need Someone The Most, That Your World Seems Smallest.

The Reward Is In The Risk.

Once Upon A Time, Sleeping Beauty Decided To Take A Nap From Which She Would Never Wake Up.

Once Upon A Time

Life Is Funny, Baby, And That's No Joke

Wherever I Went, I Was On The Wrong End Of The Stampede.

Well Sure, Who Doesn't Need A Boyfriend? But Realistically, Those Exotic Creatures Are Hard To Come By. At Least A Quality One.

People Are Like That, Judging You Before They Know You.

Cinderella!" Dov Cried. "let Down Your Hair!

The Desert Adapts. The People Adapt. Live. Die. Struggle. Suffer. Create. The People In The Real World Beyond Demesne's Ring Are Not All Manufactured Perfection. They Deal.

I Mean, I Think I Am Basically A Cool Girl, But I Am Also A Pain In The Ass.

Books. I'd Probably Spend All My Time Alone And Lost In Books If I Could. It's Easier That Way.

We're Better Off. But I Don't Know If The World's Better Off. I Don't Know If The Two Are The Same Thing.

It Broke The Spell. It's Not That I Stopped Being Happy. I Was Still Inexplicably, Utterly Happy. But Suddenly The Happiness Had Implications.

True Love. I’m Starting To Suspect The Concept Is Pure Illusion, An Insipid Brand Name Manufactured By Hallmark And Disney.” — Cupcake

If I Don't Shut Down My Brain Soon, My Imagination Will Take Off So Far About What Could Be With This Guy, That Nothing Will Ever Just Be.-- Norah, Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist

I Am Stronger Than Words And I Am Bigger Than The Box I'm In, And Then I See Her In The Crowd And I Fall Apart -i Am Listening And I Am Listening Because What I'm Playing Isn't Something I'm Thinking About, It's Something I'm Feeling All Over.

The Beatles, They Had It All Figured Out, Okay? "i Want To Hold Your Hand." The First Single. It's Effing Brilliant, Right?... That's What Everybody Wants, Nicky. They Don't Want A Twenty-four-hour Hump Sesh, They Don't Want To Be Married To You For A Hundred Years. They Just Want To Hold Your Hand.

I've Always Resented Hermione, Because I Wanted To Be Her So Badly And She Never Seemed To Appreciate As Much As I Thought She Should That She Got Be Her. She Got To Live At Hogwarts And Be Friends With Harry And Kiss Ron, Which Was Supposed To Happen To Me.

It's Not The Loving That Hurts This Girl; It's The Understanding Of It For What It Is, That It Will Never Be Returned In The Same Way, That Threatens To Destroy Her. But To Unload The Words - "i Love You" - On An Innocent Party Who Didn't Ask For It, To Reach Across The Dark Space And Touch Him - It's Like The World She Knows Could End If She Dared Speak These Words, Dared Make Such A Move.

When Is The Night Over? Is It The Start Of Sunrise Or The End Of It? Is It When You Finally Go To Sleep Or Simply When You Realize That You Have To?

There Was No Word In The Dictionary Adequate To Describe The Sensation Other Than Sensational.

No One Would Want To Read A Book In Which I Explain The Science Of Cloning Because It Would Be Very Dull And It Would Also Make No Sense.

Friendship Is Love As Much As Any Romance. And Like Any Love, It’s Difficult And Treacherous And Confusing. But In The Moment When Your Knees Touch, There’s Nothing Else You Could Ever Want.

I Feel Like There's So Much Darkness In All Of My Books.

That's Because You're Interpreting It The Wrong Way. I Didn't Mean It As A Wistful, Overdramatic Declaration. I Mean That The Love I Felt For Him Was Huge And Real, And, While Painful, It Forever Changed Me As A Person, In The Same Way That Being Your Brother Reflects And Changes How I Evolve, And Vice Versa. The Important People In Our Lives Leave Imprints. They May Stay Or Go In The Physical Realm, But They Are Always There In Your Heart, Because They Helped Form Your Heart. There's No Getting Over That.

They Were Tricky, Those Demons. Could They Be Trusted? Of Course They Could Be Trusted. She'd Created Them. She Owned Them. They Wouldn't Lead Her Astray.

I'm Thinking I Would Like To Dance In The Rain With This Person. I Would Like To Lie Next To Him In The Dark And Watch Him Breathe And Watch Him Sleep And Wonder What He's Dreaming About And Not Get An Inferiority Complex If The Dreams Aren't About Me.

That’s What I Like About Sports. No Matter If Everyone Playing The Game Speaks Completely Different Languages, On The Field, Or The Court, Wherever They Are Playing, The Language Of Moves And Passes And Scores Is All The Same. Universal.

What's Better, I Wonder - To Be A Toy For The Humans, Or To Control Your Own Destiny , Even If The Only Way To Do So Is Suicide?

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