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She Was, In Fact, Quite A Pleasant Looking Girl, Even If Her Bosom Had Clearly Been Intended For A Girl Two Feet Taller; But She Was Not Her. The Egregious Professor Of Grammar And Usage Would Have Corrected This To "she Was Not She," Which Would Have Caused The Professor Of Logic To Spit Out His Drink.

-Terry Pratchett

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She Was, In Fact,

Terry Pratchett

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She Was, In Fact, Quite A Pleasant Looking Girl, Even If Her Bosom Had Clearly Been Intended For A Girl Two Feet Taller; But She Was Not Her. The Egregious Professor Of Grammar And Usage Would Have Corrected This To "she Was Not She," Which Would Have Caused The Professor Of Logic To Spit Out His Drink.

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Once You've Ruled Out The Impossible Then Whatever Is Left, However Improbable, Must Be The Truth. The Problem Lay In Working Out What Was Impossible, Of Course. That Was The Trick, All Right. There Was Also The Curious Incident Of The Orangutan In The Night-time.

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See A Pin And Pick It Up, And, All Day Long, You'll Have A Pin.

It Doesn't Matter How You Live And Die, It's How The Bards Wrote It Down.

Ingenuity And Incongruity Always Cheer Me Up.

Letitia! What A Name. Halfway Between A Salad And A Sneeze.

Sooner Or Later All Men Must Die. Everything Dies In The End. I Can Be Robbed But Never Denied, I Told Myself. Why Worry? “i Too Cannot Be Cheated,” Snapped Fate.

My Dream Holiday Would Be A) A Ticket To Amsterdam B) Immunity From Prosecution And C) A Baseball Bat.

There Are Times In Life When People Must Know When Not To Let Go. Balloons Are Designed To Teach Small Children This.

They Were Also Slightly Less Intelligent Than He Was. This Is A Quality You Should Always Pray For In Your Would-be Murderer.

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London Was Not Designed For Cars. Come To That, It Wasn't Designed For People. It Just Sort Of Happened. This Created Problems, And The Solutions That Were Implemented Became The Next Problems, Five Or Ten Or A Hundred Years Down The Line.

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All Property Is Theft, Except Mine.

Neither Of My Parents Went To Church, But They Did Everything That You Needed To Do To Be Christian. That's Something A Quaker Would Call An Intimation Of The Divine.

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Funny, Reely," He Said. "you Spend Your Whole Life Goin' To School And Learnin' Stuff, And They Never Tell You About Stuff Like The Bermuda Triangle And Ufos And All These Old Masters Running Around The Inside Of The Earth. Why Do We Have To Learn Boring Stuff When There's All This Brilliant Stuff We Could Be Learnin', That's What I Want To Know.

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Too Much Magic Could Wrap Time And Space Around Itself, And That Wasn't Good News For The Kind Of Person Who Had Grown Used To Things Like Effects Following Things Like Causes.

The Point Of Page One Is To Make People Turn To Page Two And If At The End Of The Book People Think That The Book Was Good Value For Money, You Have Achieved Something, Because If You Haven't Achieved Those Things You're Not Going To Achieve The Other Thing.

He Never Pays Attention, He Always Knows The Answer, And He Can Never Tell You How He Knows. We Can't Keep Thrashing Him. He Is A Bad Example To The Other Pupils. There's No Educating A Smart Boy.

And What Do You Really Do? Asked Tiffany. The Thin Witch Hesitatied For A Moment, And Then: We Look To ... The Edges, Said Mistress Weatherwax. There's A Lot Of Edges, More Than People Know. Between Life And Death, This World And The Next, Night And Day, Right And Wrong ... An' They Need Watchin'. We Watch 'em, We Guard The Sum Of Things. And We Never Ask For Any Reward. That's Important.

In My Experience, What Every True Artist Wants, Really Wants, Is To Be Paid.

How Do You Get All Those Coins?" Asked Mort. In Pairs.

As We All Know, The Discworld Is A Flat Planet - Like A Geological Pizza, But Without The Anchovies.

Botswana Is Also The Only Country In The World With A Colour In Its Flag Meant To Represent Rain (a Sort Of Blue-grey). Not Many People Know This.

It Was Nice To Hear The Voices Of Little Children At Play, Provided You Took Care To Be Far Enough Away Not To Hear What They Were Actually Saying.

If Complete And Utter Chaos Was Lightning, Then He'd Be The Sort To Stand On A Hilltop In A Thunderstorm Wearing Wet Copper Armour And Shouting 'all Gods Are Bastards!

Journalism Makes You Think Fast. You Have To Speak To People In All Walks Of Life. Especially Local Journalism.

The Gods Of The Disc Have Never Bothered Much About Judging The Souls Of The Dead, And So People Only Go To Hell If That's Where They Believe, In Their Deepest Heart, That They Deserve To Go. Which They Won't Do If They Don't Know About It. This Explains Why It Is So Important To Shoot Missionaries On Sight.

If There Were Such A Thing As An Inter-city Thieving Contest, Ankh-morpork Would Bring Home The Trophy And Probably Everyone’s Wallets.

Many Feel They Are Called To The Priesthood, But What They Really Hear Is An Inner Voice Saying, 'it's Indoor Work With No Heavy Lifting, Do You Want To Be A Ploughman Like Your Father?'

The Merest Accident Of Microgeography Had Meant That The First Man To Hear The Voice Of Om, And Who Gave Om His View Of Humans, Was A Shepherd And Not A Goatherd. They Have Quite Different Ways Of Looking At The World, And The Whole Of History Might Have Been Different. For Sheep Are Stupid, And Have To Be Driven. But Goats Are Intelligent, And Need To Be Led.

I'd Like To Sell A Lot Of Books.

Luck Is My Middle Name. Mind You, My First Name Is Bad.

And Sin, Young Man, Is When You Treat People Like Things.

It Was Octarine, The Colour Of Magic. It Was Alive And Glowing And Vibrant And It Was The Undisputed Pigment Of The Imagination, Because Wherever It Appeared It Was A Sign That Mere Matter Was A Servant Of The Powers Of The Magical Mind. It Was Enchantment Itself. But Rincewind Always Thought It Looked A Sort Of Greenish-purple.

A Thaum Is The Basic Unit Of Magical Strength. It Has Been Universally Established As The Amount Of Magic Needed To Create One Small White Pigeon Or Three Normal-sized Billiard Balls.

It Is A Long-cherished Tradition Among A Certain Type Of Military Thinker That Huge Casualties Are The Main Thing. If They Are On The Other Side Then This Is A Valuable Bonus.

It Doesn't Stop Being Magic Just Because You Know How It Works.

[...] The Awesome Splendor Of The Universe Is Much Easier To Deal With If You Think Of It As A Series Of Small Chunks.

And We Don't Often Get Any Wading Birds In The River Ankh, Mainly Because The Pollution Would Eat Their Legs Away And Anyway, It's Easier For Them To Walk On The Surface.

I Had A Deprived Childhood, You See. I Had Lots Of Other Kids To Play With And My Parents Bought Me Outdoor Toys And Refused To Ill-treat Me, So It Never Occurred To Me To Seek Solitary Consolation With A Good Book.

Probably The Last Man Who Knew How It Worked Had Been Tortured To Death Years Before. Or As Soon As It Was Installed. Killing The Creator Was A Traditional Method Of Patent-protection.

The Yen Buddhists Are The Richest Religious Sect In The Universe. They Hold That The Accumulation Of Money Is A Great Evil And A Burden To The Soul. They Therefore, Regardless Of Personal Hazard, See It As Their Unpleasant Duty To Acquire As Much As Possible In Order To Reduce The Risk To Innocent People.

Real Education Happens When You Pick Up A Fact Here, And Another Fact There, And Put Them Together And Get An Insight.

It Is At This Point That Normal Language Gives Up, And Goes And Has A Drink.

People Whose Concept Of Ancient History Is The First Series Of Star Trek May Be Treated With Patience, Because It's Usually Not Their Fault They Were Reduced To Getting Their Education From School.

The Price Of Being The Best Is Having To Be The Best.

I Thought Unicorns Were More . . . Fluffy.

Wisdom Comes From Experience. Experience Is Often A Result Of Lack Of Wisdom.

Wisdom Experience

Wisdom And Experience

It Was The Living Who Ignored The Strange And Wonderful, Because Life Was Too Full Of The Boring And Mundane.

When People Say "clearly" Something That Means There's A Huge Crack In Their Argument And They Know Things Aren't Clear At All.

Once You Gave A Thing A Name, You Gave It Life.

No. Men Should Die For Lies. But The Truth Is Too Precious To Die For.

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