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It's Quite Frightening; The Business Of Trying To Be Funny Is Very Hairy. In Comedy, The Potential For Humiliation Is Huge. Trying To Be Funny And Failing Is About The Most Embarrassing Thing You Can Do.

-Emily Mortimer

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It's Quite Frightening; The

Emily Mortimer

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It's Quite Frightening; The Business Of Trying To Be Funny Is Very Hairy. In Comedy, The Potential For Humiliation Is Huge. Trying To Be Funny And Failing Is About The Most Embarrassing Thing You Can Do.

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Los Angeles Is Like A Beauty Parlor At The End Of The Universe.

My Take On People And On The Characters I Play In Transsiberian, The Role You're Looking For, Is That Everybody Is More Than One Thing. We're Many Things, All Of Us, And There Are Times When We Are Capable Of Great Levity And Jolliness And Then There Are Times When The Opposite Is True.

I Already Feel A Bit Annoyed At Myself For Writing Screenplays. It's A Bit, I Don't Know, Model-singer-dancer-actress That Went To A Posh School. There's Something Too Weirdly Predictable About It.

I'm A Dual Citizen, As Are My Husband And Children. We Have Got Eight Passports Between Us; We're Weighed Down By Them Whenever We Go Anywhere.

If There's Any Plan Or Scheme On My Part, It's Subconscious. Whatever I Do Tends To Be Very Different From The Thing I Did Last. You're Terrified Of Boring Either Yourself Or Anyone Else. It's Always Attractive If It Feels Like Something That You Haven't Done Before. I Generally Tend To Be Better, I Think, When I'm Terrified Out Of My Wits.

'leonie' Did Get Made And It Was An Extremely Wonderful Experience. I Got To Travel The World. I Filmed For 6 Months - 3 Months In New Orleans And 3 Months In Japan.

51st State Was One That I Loved Doing Because The Character Was So Out There, And In A Way I Was Sad To Leave The Character Behind. I'm Afraid I Could Never Be That Cool In Real Life!

I Think Georges Feydeau Said Comedy Is Just Tragedy Speeded Up.

I Had Friends At School, But I Was Never Part Of A Gang And I Dreamed Of That Sense Of Belonging To A Group. You Know, Where People Would Call Me 'em' And Shout Across The Bar, 'em, What Are You Drinking?' After The Show.

I Wake Up Early. At 6:30 A.m., I'm At My Most Optimistic.

I'm An Optimist By Nature, Myself, I Think.

I Had Watched 'alfie,' But I Didn't Consider It A Prerequisite. Michael Caine Was Just Extremely Fabulous. He's One Of The Most Professional Actors I've Ever Worked With. I Guess After A Lifetime Of Doing It, You Know What You're Doing. He's Incredibly Uncomplaining, Undemanding.

You Do The One Film That You Think Is Terrible, But It's A Big Studio Film And You Hope You'll Get Another Job Because Of It, Because Blah Blah Blah, Whatever It Is. You Know That You Hate It, You Just Couldn't Care Less If It Got Made Because It's Not Something In A Million Years You'd Go And See Yourself. And It Ends Up Being Shite And You Just Knew It Was Shite To Begin With, And It Doesn't Do You Any Favors At All If Someone Thought You Were In Another Shite Film. So I Decided It Doesn't Get Me Anywhere Being Cynical. It's Not That I Want To Be.

I Borrowed My Friends Car The Other Day In An Attempt To Persuade My Husband That We Needed A Car And Literally This Is True, In The First Day Of Borrowing The Car, I Got Three Tickets And I Rear-ended It.

I Guess Secrets Are Part Of The Fabric Of Everybody's Lives. I Mean Everybody's Lives, And Guilt Is Part Of The Fabric Of Everybody's Lives.

In My First Few Years As An Actor, I Took One Terrible Tv Job After Another. But Even As I Laughed Off My Awful Roles And Made Fun Of Myself To Friends, My Work Made Me Cringe - I Dreaded Anyone's Seeing It. I Was Crushed That I Wasn't Doing Anything I Was Proud Of.

The Ratings Thing Is The Real Issue. It Really Hurts Movies. For Example, In Redbelt, I Smoked. The Whole Plot Of My Character Was Based On The Fact That I Was A Smoker. And Then They Discovered That Just By Having Someone Smoking In The Movie, It Immediately Makes The Rating An R. So They Had To Cut Out Every Shot Where I Had A Cigarette In My Hand And It Totally Affected The Performance. That Was Very Frustrating To David Mamet As Well. I Can Remember Him Saying, "it's A Nightmare."

I Decided To Give Acting A Serious, Committed Try, And Soon After, I Read The Script For 'lovely And Amazing.' The Story Was Beautiful And Honest, And The Characters Struggled With The Same Insecurities Many Women - Including Me - Face. I Didn't Think I Had A Chance In Hell Of Being In The Film, But I Knew I Had To Go For It.

My Dad Had This Philosophy That If You Tell Children They're Beautiful And Wonderful Then They Believe It, And They Will Be. So I Never Thought I Was Unattractive. But I Was Never One Of The Girls At School Who Had Lots Of Boyfriends.

Doing Press Is Like Eating At Mcdonald's: While It's Going On It's Vaguely Enjoyable - You're Seduced By Your Own Vanity And Taking Yourself Rather Seriously - But Immediately Afterwards You Feel Sick.

I Must Have Been A Really Pretentious Little Girl.

I Was Determined Not To Become An American Citizen But I Did It For Completely Cynical Reasons: To Avoid Paying Inheritance Tax In The U.s.

I Spent A Lot Of Time With A Real Detective, A Lady Detective Inspector Who Was The Only Female Detective Inspector In The Whole Of East London. She And I Hung Out A Lot. She Showed Me What She Did And I Spent Time With Her. So, [she Was] A Lot Of The Inspiration For The Way I Dressed And Sometimes The Dialogue In Those Interview Scenes Where We're Cross Examining And Questioning The Youths And Trying To Get A Confession Out Of Them.

It's Censorship, Really. I Don't See Why It's Not Okay For Somebody Under The Age Of 17 Watch Someone Smoking When They Can Watch Someone Have Their Brains Blown Out? My Son And I Were Watching An Ad On The Television The Other Day. And It Said, "rated R." He Said, "what Does 'rated R' Mean?" I Said, "god, I Don't Know. You Can't Watch It Unless You're Over A Certain Age."

I'm Just Happy To Be A Film Where For Once I Don't Have To Worry About My Hair, Because My Managers Are Always Complaining About My Hair Looking Depressing In My Movies. Which Is True. I Mean, It's True.

It's Very Difficult To Find The Time Or The Money For People To Organize Rehearsals For Some Movies. It Staggers Me How Little Preparation Often Goes Into These Scenes Which Are Difficult And Complicated. You Think, "god, It's Crazy. I've Never Met This Person Before And Here I Am Having To Work At How To Do A Whole Performance On The Set." It Was Great To Have A Few Days Of Just Talking To Michael [caine] And Daniel [barber] And Thinking About The Characters And The Relationship Between Them Before We Started Shooting.

There's A Whole World Of Bad Tv That's Along Similar Themes - The Cop Drama.

It's Dangerous Talking About Yourself Too Much Because You Find Yourself Talking In Sound Bites.

Finding Yourself

Accents Are Very Tangible, Blessedly, And If You Have To Do One, It's A Way Of Getting Into Character. I Can Read It Through A Few Times And Pretend I Know What I'm Doing!

I Thought A Parent's Job Was To Tell Their Children Not To Go Into Acting As A Profession!

Despite Being Extremely Professional, Michael Caine Has A Giggle Which Was Lethal For Me Because Once You Catch His Eyes, Once You Realize The Other Person Is A Giggler Too, It's Curtains.

I've Only Half-admitted I'm A Professional. I Know I Am, I've Paid My Dues, But One Of The Things I Could Do Better When I'm Acting Is To Really Be Rigorous And To Think I Know How To Do It. To Use My Brain.

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So Far I Haven't Really Been Prominent Enough To Get Critical Attention Focused On Me. So, Of Course, I Fully Expect Bad Reviews, But I Will Be Wracked With Misery As A Result.

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There Were Moments Where I Was Being Kicked In The Stomach, And Even Though I Had This Brace On To Protect Me, I Still Had To Prepare Myself For It . You Can't Be Relaxed When That's Happening. You Have To Brace Your Muscles. I Can Remember Thinking As It Was About To Happen "wasn't That How Houdini Died?" I Think It Was.

You Don't Have To Be Brilliant At Everything. You Just Have To Have The Courage To Put Yourself In The Line Of Fire.

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I'm Physically Completely Mal-coordinated. My Best Friend Used To Make Me Run For The Bus Just To Give Herself A Quick, Cheap Laugh Because I Definitely Don't Have That Sophisticated Cool Thing Down.

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There's Something Helpful About The Fast Pace Of A Tv Set Where Everything Has To Be Finished By The End Of The Week. You Have To Finish The Episode; It Doesn't Matter How Long You Have To Go On Friday Night, But You Have To Get It Done.

It's Quite Frightening; The Business Of Trying To Be Funny Is Very Hairy. In Comedy, The Potential For Humiliation Is Huge. Trying To Be Funny And Failing Is About The Most Embarrassing Thing You Can Do.

I Want Any Excuse To Come Home. My Dad Is Not A Spring Chicken Any More. If Anyone Says, 'go Buy A Postage Stamp In London,' I'll Go And Do It.

Breakfast Is My Favorite Meal. I Cook A Big One For Everyone - Bacon And Eggs. I Own A Lot Of Eggcups.

Good People Can Do Terrible Things, And That's What Life Is All About, The Complexities And Grey Areas. And Often Characters Aren't Written That Way In Movies, Especially Characters For Women. So You End Up Being Either One Thing Or The Other.

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