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If I Had My Way Books Would Not Be Written In English But In An Exceedingly Difficult Secret Language.... This Plan Would Have The Advantage Of Scaring Off All Amateur Authors, Retired Politicians, Country Doctors...who Would Not Have The Patience To Learn The Secret Language.

-Robertson Davies

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If I Had My

Robertson Davies

...

If I Had My Way Books Would Not Be Written In English But In An Exceedingly Difficult Secret Language.... This Plan Would Have The Advantage Of Scaring Off All Amateur Authors, Retired Politicians, Country Doctors...who Would Not Have The Patience To Learn The Secret Language.

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The Us, For Historical Reasons, Mistrusts The Concept Of A Welfare State, And This Mistrust Shows Itself Nakedly Under Present Us Government, Which Commits Uncounted Billions Of The National Wealth To What It Calls Defence, And Is Close-fisted In Giving Money To Plans Which Would Ameliorate The Grinding Poverty Of A Great Part Of Its People. Quite Simply, In Canada You Could Not Get Away With That.

Like It Or Not, To Reach Middle Age With Less Money Or Less Prestige Than Our Father Had Is Somewhat To Lose Face. Stupid Of Course, When Put Like That, But Who Is Prepared To Argue That We Are Not Stupid In Several Important Ways?

The Clerisy Are Those Who Seek, And Find, Delight And Enlargement Of Life In Books. The Clerisy Are Those For Whom Reading Is A Personal Art.

Whoever Declares A Child To Be "delicate" Thereby Crowns And Anoints A Tyrant.

Oh Hearts! Nobody Gets Through Life Without A Broken Heart. The Important Thing Is To Break The Heart So That When It Mends It Will Be Stronger Than Before.

We Have Educated Ourselves Into A World From Which Wonder, And He Fear And Dread And Splendor And Freedom Of Wonder Have Been Banished. Of Course Wonder Is Costly. You Couldn't Incorporate It Into A Modern State, Beacuse It Is The Antithesis Of The Anxiously Worshiped Security Which Is What A Modern State Is Asked To Give. Wonder Is Marvellous But It Is Also Cruel, Cruel, Cruel. It Is Undemocratic, Discriminatory And Pitiless.

Canada Has One Of The Highest Rates Of Insanity In Any Civilized Country And One Reason Might Be That Life In Many Places Is So Desperately Dull.

No One Needs A Word Processor If He Has An Efficient Secretary.

Female Beauty Is An Important Minor Sacrament Which Cannot Be Received Too Often; I Am Not At All Sure That Neglect Of It Does Not Constitute A Sin Of Some Kind.

If I Had My Way Books Would Not Be Written In English, But In An Exceedingly Difficult Secret Language That Only Skilled Professional Readers And Story-tellers Could Interpret. Then People Would Have To Go To Public Halls And Pay Good Prices To Hear. . .

That Is The Operatic Problem; The Singer Must Keep Up A Big Head Of Steam While Trying To Appear Secretive, Or Seductive, Or Consumptive. Some Ingenious Composer Should Write An Opera About A Group Of People Who Were Condemned By A Cruel God To Scream All The Time; It Would Be An Instantaneous Success, And A Triumph Of Versimilitude.

Computers Will Have To Learn That When I Quote From Some Old Author Who Spelled Differently From The Machine, The Wishes Of The Long-dead Author Will Have To Be Respected, And The Machine Will Have To Mind Its Manners

The Attributes Of God Have Been Carefully Explored. But The Devil's Attributes Have Been Left Vague. I Think I've Found One Of Them. It Is He Who Puts The Prices On Things." "doesn't God Put A Price On Things?" "no. One Of His Attributes Is Magnanimity. But The Devil Is A Setter Of Prices, And A Usurer, As Well. You Buy From Him At An Agreed Price, But The Payments Are All On Time, And The Interest Is Charged On The Whole Of The Principal, Right Up To The Last Payment, However Much Of The Principal You Think You Have Paid Off In The Meantime.

Real Bibliophiles Do Not Put Their Books On Shelves For People To Look At Or Handle. They Have No Desire To Show Off Their Darlings, Or To Amaze People With Their Possessions. They Keep Their Prized Books Hidden Away In A Secret Spot To Which They Resort Stealthily, Like A Caliph Visiting His Harem, Or A Church Elder Sneaking Into A Bar. To Be A Book Collector Is To Combine The Worst Characteristics Of A Dope-fiend With Those Of A Miser.

Happiness Is Always A By-product. It Is Probably A Matter Of Temperament, And For Anything I Know It May Be Glandular. But It Is Not Something That Can Be Demanded From Life, And If You Are Not Happy You Had Better Stop Worrying About It And See What Treasures You Can Pluck From Your Own Brand Of Unhappiness.

The Clerisy Are Those Who Read For Pleasure, But Not For Idleness; Who Read For Pastime But Not To Kill Time; Who Love Books, But Do Not Live By Books

I Was Afraid And Did Not Know What I Feared, Which Is The Worst Kind Of Fear.

I Have No Skills With Machines. I Fear Them, And Because I Cannot Help Attributing Human Qualities To Them, I Suspect That They Hate Me And Will Kill Me If They Can.

It Is Odd How All Men Develop The Notion, As They Grow Older, That Their Mothers Were Wonderful Cooks. I Have Yet To Meet A Man Who Will Admit That His Mother Was A Kitchen Assassin And Nearly Poisoned Him.

There Is More To Marriage Than Four Bare Legs Under A Blanket.

A Man Must Be Obedient To The Promptings Of His Innermost Heart.

The Women We Really Love Are The Women Who Complete Us, Who Have The Qualities We Can Borrow And So Become Something Nearer To Whole Men. Just As We Complete Them, Of Course; It’s Not A One-way Thing. Leola And I, When Romance Was Stripped Away, Were Too Much Alike; Our Strengths And Weaknesses Were Too Nearly The Same. Together We Would Have Doubled Our Gains And Our Losses, But That Isn’t What Love Is.

The Greatest Gift That Oxford Gives Her Sons Is, I Truly Believe, A Genial Irreverence Toward Learning, And From That Irreverence Love May Spring.

Very Often When I Am Introduced To Women, I Think, What Is She Really Like Behind The Disguise Which She Wears? And Very Often I Discover That She Is Pleasant Enough, And Probably Would Expand And Glow If She Received Enough Affection.

If You Attack Stupidity You Attack An Entrenched Interest With Friends In Government And Every Walk Of Public Life.

They [say] Everybody's Creative. Well, Everybody Is. But Any Real Creativity Has To Rest On A Basis Of An Acquired Technique And An Acquired Knowledge; You Can't Be Creative In A Void, Or You Just Get A Mess.

In India It Is Regarded As A Good Idea To Dart In Front Of An Oncoming Car, For The Car Is Sure To Kill The Evil Spirits Who Are Pursuing You, And All The Rest Of Your Life You Will Have Good Luck.

I Think We Should See Whether We Are Wise Trying To Educate Everybody To A High Standard The Way We Are Trying To Do Now. There Has To Be A High Level Of Education So Everybody Is Literate, But Whether University Education Is Necessary For Everyone Is Open To Question.

Secrets Are The Blood Of Life. Every Big Thing Is A Secret, Even When You Know It, Because You Never Know All Of It. If You Can Know Everything About Anything, It Is Not Worth Knowing.

And Why Should It Not Be Terrifying? A Little Terror, In My View, Is Good For The Soul, When It Is Terror In The Face Of A Noble Object.

People Are Not Saints Just Because They Haven't Got Much Money Or Education.

The Eye Sees Only What The Mind Is Prepared To Comprehend.

Imagination Is A Good Horse To Carry You Over The Ground - Not A Flying Carpet To Set You Free From Probability.

Happiness Is A By-product. It Is Not A Primary Product Of Life. It Is A Thing Which You Suddenly Realize You Have Because You're So Delighted To Be Doing Something Which Perhaps Has Nothing Whatever To Do With Happiness.

Not Enough Attention Is Paid To The Negative Side Of Fashion. Great Effort Is Exerted To Make People Look Smart, But Somebody Should Face The Fact That A Lot Of People Never Will Be Smart, And That They Should Be Given Some Assistance In Maintaining Their Fascinating Dowdiness.

Extraordinary People Survive Under The Most Terrible Circumstances And They Become More Extraordinary Because Of It.

Ordinary Extraordinary

The Whole World Is Burdened With Young Fogies. Old Men With Ossified Minds Are Easily Dealt With. But Men Who Look Young, Act Young, And Everlastingly Harp On The Fact They Are Young, But Who Nevertheless Think And Act With A Degree Of Caution Which Would Be Excessive In Their Grandfathers, Are The Curses Of The World.

There Are Times When I Think That The Reading I Have Done In The Past Has Had No Effect Except To Cloud My Mind And Make Me Indecisive

Conversation In Its True Meaning Isn't All Wagging The Tongue; Sometimes It Is A Deeply Shared Silence.

The Drama May Be Called That Part Of Theatrical Art Which Lends Itself Most Readily To Intellectual Discussion: What Is Left Is Theater.

Curiosity Is Part Of The Cement That Holds Society Together.

The People Of The United States, Perhaps More Than Any Other Nation In History, Love To Abase Themselves And Proclaim Their Unworthiness, And Seem To Find Refreshment In Doing So... That Is A Dark Frivolity, But Still Frivolity.

I See Canada As A Country Torn Between A Very Northern, Rather Extraordinary, Mystical Spirit Which It Fears And Its Desire To Present Itself To The World As A Scotch Banker.

I Do Not 'get' Ideas; Ideas Get Me

Celtic Civilization Was Tribal, But By No Means Savage Or Uncultivated. People Who Regarded The Theft Of A Harp From A Bard As A Crime Second Only To An Attack On The Tribal Chieftain Cannot Be Regarded As Wanting In Cultivated Feeling.

Fiction Is Not Photography, It's Oil Painting.

Authors Like Cats Because They Are Such Quiet, Lovable, Wise Creatures, And Cats Like Authors For The Same Reasons.

All Mothers Think Their Children Are Oaks, But The World Never Lacks For Cabbages.

I Do Not Really Like Vacations. I Much Prefer An Occasional Day Off When I Do Not Feel Like Working. When I Am Confronted With A Whole Week In Which I Have Nothing To Do But Enjoy Myself I Do Not Know Where To Begin. To Me, Enjoyment Comes Fleetingly And Unheralded; I Cannot Determinedly Enjoy Myself For A Whole Week At A Time.

The Nature Of Happiness Is Such That Happiness Retreats The More Intensely You Pursue It.

The Pleasures Of Love Are For Those Who Are Hopelessly Addicted To Another Living Creature. The Reasons For Such Addiction Are So Many That I Suspect They Are Never The Same In Any Two Cases. It Includes Passion But Does Not Survive By Passion; It Has Its Whiffs Of The Agreeable Vertigo Of Young Love, But It Is Stable More Often Than Dizzy; It Is A Growing, Changing Thing, And It Is Tactful Enough To Give The Addicted Parties Occasional Rests From Strong And Exhausting Feeling Of Any Kind.

You Would Not Serve Junk Food At A Banquet, And Your Book Must Be A Banquet. Get Your Language From Swift, Not From Shopsy's.

The Reclusive Man Who Marries The Gregarious Woman, The Timid Woman Who Marries The Courageous Man, The Idealist Who Marries The Realist We Can All See These Unions: The Marriages In Which Tenderness Meets Loyalty, Where Generosity Sweetens Moroseness, Where A Sense Of Beauty Eases Some Aridity Of The Spirit, Are Not So Easy For Outsiders To Recognize; The Parties Themselves May Not Be Fully Aware Of Such Elements In A Good Match.

The Quality Of What Is Said Inevitably Influences The Way In Which It Is Said, However Inexperienced The Writer.

We Live In A World Where Bulk Is Equated With Quality.

You Never See What You Want To See, Forever Playing To The Gallery.

The Little Boy Nodded At The Peony And The Peony Seemed To Nod Back. The Little Boy Was Neat, Clean And Pretty. The Peony Was Unchaste, Dishevelled As Peonies Must Be, And At The Height Of Its Beauty.(...) Every Hour Is Filled With Such Moments, Big With Significance For Someone.

I Was Not Sure I Wanted To Issue Orders To Life; I Rather Liked The Greek Notion Of Allowing Chance To Take A Formative Hand In My Affairs.

Fanaticism Is Overcompensation For Doubt.

I Think We're Living In An Age Which Despises Humanity And Despises Bravery And Doesn't Need Bravery Because Modern Warfare Has Rather Gone Beyond Bravery. It Is A Kind Of Warfare Where People Are Fighting Enemies They Never See, Killing People Of Whom They Know Nothing.

I Came At Last To A Recognition Of Myself As, In Part, A Tom Sawyer Who Wanted Everything Done According To The Rules Of Romantic Fiction, And Complicated Simple Solutions With His Absurd Adolescent, Book-born Nonsense.

When A Man Is Down On His Luck He Seems To Consume All He Can Get Of Coffee And Doughnuts.

One Can Always Tell It's Summer When One Sees School Teachers Hanging About The Streets Idly, Looking Like Cannibals During A Shortage Of Missionaries.

If I Had My Way Books Would Not Be Written In English But In An Exceedingly Difficult Secret Language.... This Plan Would Have The Advantage Of Scaring Off All Amateur Authors, Retired Politicians, Country Doctors...who Would Not Have The Patience To Learn The Secret Language.

After All, We Are Human Beings, And Not Creatures Of Infinite Possibilities.

Humour Very Often Consists Of Shrewd Perceptions About People. It's Usually Fun At Someone's Expense. Nowadays If You're Funny At Anybody's Expense They Run To The Un And Say, "i Must Have An Ombudsman To Protect Me." You Hardly Dare Have A Shrewd Perception About Anybody.

She Has Been Kissed As Often As A Police-court Bible, And By Much The Same Class Of People.

Women Say . . . That If Men Had To Have Babies There Would Soon Be No Babies In The World. . . . I Have Sometimes Wished That Some Clever Man Would Actually Have A Baby In Some New Labor-saving Way; Then All Men Could Take It Up, And One Of The Oldest Taunts In The World Would Be Stilled Forever.

Art Is Wine And Experience Is The Brandy We Distill From It.

If A Man Wants To Be Of The Greatest Possible Value To His Fellow-creature S Let Him Begin The Long, Solitary Task Of Perfecting Himself.

The Critic Is The Duenna In The Passionate Affair Between Playwrights, Actors And Audiences - A Figure Dreaded, And Occasionally Comic, But Never Welcome, Never Loved.

Although There May Be Nothing New Under The Sun, What Is Old Is New To Us And So Rich And Astonishing That We Never Tire Of It. If We Do Tire Of It, If We Lose Our Curiosity, We Have Lost Something Of Infinite Value, Because To A High Degree It Is Curiosity That Gives Meaning And Savour To Life.

It Is In This Matter That I Fall Foul Of So Many American Writers On Writing; They Seem To Think That Writing Is A Confidence Game By Means Of Which The Author Cajoles A Restless, Dull-witted, Shallow Audience Into Hearing His Point Of View. Such An Attitude Is Base, And Can Only Beget Base Prose.

We Mistrust Anything That Too Strongly Challenges Our Ideal Of Mediocrity.

The Young Are Often Accused Of Exaggerating Their Troubles; They Do So, Very Often, In The Hope Of Making Some Impression Upon The Inertia And The Immovability Of The Selfish Old.

In My Collection, To Me At Least, The Theatre Of The Past Lives Again And Those Long-dead Playwrights And Actors Have In Me An Enthralled Audience Of One, And I Applaud Them Across The Centuries.

Audience Of One

A Boy Is A Man In Miniature, And Though He May Sometimes Exhibit Notable Virtue, As Well As Characteristics That Seem To Be Charming Because They Are Childlike, He Is Also A Schemer, Self-seeker, Traitor, Judas, Crook, And Villain - In Short, A Man.

To Be A Book-collector Is To Combine The Worst Characteristics Of A Dope Fiend With Those Of A Miser.

Women Always Think That If They Tell A Man Not To Be Pompous That Will Shut Him Up, But I Am An Old Hand At That Game. I Know That If A Man Bides His Time His Moment Will Come.

Money, It Is Often Said, Does Not Bring Happiness; It Must Be Added, However, That It Makes It Possible To Support Unhappiness With Exemplary Fortitude.

"children, Don't Speak So Coarsely," Said Mr Webster, Who Had A Vague Notion That Some Supervision Should Be Exercised Over His Daughters' Speech, And That A Line Should Be Drawn, But Never Knew Quite When To Draw It. He Had Allowed His Daughters To Use His Library Without Restraint, And Nothing Is More Fatal To Maidenly Delicacy Of Speech Than The Run Of A Good Library.

Many Authors Write Like Amateur Blacksmiths Making Their First Horseshoe; The Clank Of The Anvil, The Stench Of The Scorched Leather Apron, The Sparks And The Cursing Are Palpable, And This Appeals To Those Who Rank "sincerity" Very High. Nabokov Is More Like A Master Swordsmith Making A Fine Blade; Nothing Is Amiss, Nothing Is Too Much, There Is No Fuss, And The Finished Product Must Be Handled With Great Care, Or It Will Cut You Badly.

The Book Forces Itself Into My Mind When I Am Lugging Furniture, Or Pulling Weeds.

Inactivity And Deprivation Of All Accustomed Stimulus Is Not Rest; It Is A Preparation For The Tomb

Their Very Conservatism Is Secondhand, And They Don't Know What They Are Conserving.

It Is Not Always Easy To Diagnose. The Simplest Form Of Stupidity - The Mumbling, Nose-picking, Stolid Incomprehension - Can Be Detected By Anyone. But The Stupidity Which Disguises Itself As Thought, And Which Talks So Glibly And Eloquently, Indeed Never Stops Talking, In Every Walk Of Life Is Not So Easy To Identify, Because It Marches Under A Formidable Name, Which Few Dare Attack. It Is Called Popular Opinion.

Of Course, Fairies Are All Imported In North America. We Have No Native Fairies. The Little People Do Not Long Survive Importation Unless They Go To California And Grow Large And Beautiful, But Haven't Much Flavour, Like The Fruit And The Film Stars.

A Happy Childhood Has Spoiled Many A Promising Life.

Oho, Now I Know What You Are. You Are An Advocate Of Useful Knowledge.... Well, Allow Me To Introduce Myself To You As An Advocate Of Ornamental Knowledge. You Like The Mind To Be A Neat Machine, Equipped To Work Efficiently, If Narrowly, And With No Extra Bits Or Useless Parts. I Like The Mind To Be A Dustbin Of Scraps Of Brilliant Fabric, Odd Gems, Worthless But Fascinating Curiosities, Tinsel, Quaint Bits Of Carving, And A Reasonable Amount Of Healthy Dirt. Shake The Machine And It Goes Out Of Order; Shake The Dustbin And It Adjusts Itself Beautifully To Its New Position.

Speakers' Nerves Affect Them In Various Ways. Some Tremble, Some Become Frenzied. I Lose All Confidence, And Suffer From A Leaden Oppression That Makes Me Wonder Why I Ever Agreed To Speak At All; The Tomb And The Conqueror Worm Seem Preferable To Delivering The Stupid And Piffling Speech I Have So Carefully Prepared.

The Victorians Have Been Immoderately Praised, And Immoderately Blamed, And Surely It Is Time We Formed Some Reasonable Picture Of Them? There Was Their Courageous, Intellectually Adventurous Side, Their Greedy And Inhuman Side, Their Superbly Poetic Side, Their Morally Pretentious Side, Their Tea And Buttered Toast Side, And Their Champagne And Skittles Side. Much Like Ourselves, In Fact, Though Rather Dirtier.

Art Is Always At Peril In Universities, Where There Are So Many People, Young And Old, Who Love Art Less Than Argument, And Dote Upon A Text That Provides The Nutritious Pemmican On Which Scholars Love To Chew.

The Best Among Our Writers Are Doing Their Accustomed Work Of Mirroring What Is Deep In The Spirit Of Our Time; If Chaos Appears In Those Mirrors, We Must Have Faith That In The Future, As Always In The Past, That Chaos Will Slowly Reveal Itself As A New Aspect Of Order.

When Irony First Makes Itself Known In A Young Man's Life, It Can Be Like His First Experience Of Getting Drunk; He Has Met With A Powerful Thing Which He Does Not Know How To Handle.

To Be Apt In Quotation Is A Splendid And Dangerous Gift. Splendid, Because It Ornaments A Man's Speech With Other Men's Jewels; Dangerous, For The Same Reason.

Canada Was Settled, In The Main, By People With A Lower Middle-class Outlook, And A Respect, Rather Than An Affectionate Familiarity, For The Things Of The Mind.

To Ask An Author Who Hopes To Be A Serious Writer If His Work Is Autobiographical Is Like Asking A Spider Where He Buys His Thread. The Spider Gets His Thread Right Out Of His Own Guts, And That Is Where The Author Gets His Writing.

The Inert Mind Is A Greater Danger Than The Inert Body, For It Overlays And Stifles The Desire To Live.

This Is The Great Theatre Of Life. Admission Is Free, But The Taxation Is Mortal. You Come When You Can, And Leave When You Must. The Show Is Continuous. Goodnight.

A Library Goes On As Far As Thought Can Reach.

If You Are Not Happy You Had Better Stop Worrying About It And See What Treasures You Can Pluck From Your Own Brand Of Unhappiness.

In A Government Like Ours, The Crown Is The Abiding And Unshakable Element In Government; Politicians May Come And Go, But The Crown Remains And Certain Aspects Of Our System Pertain To It Which Are Not Dependent On Any Political Party. In This Sense, The Crown Is The Consecrated Spirit Of Canada.

The World Is Full Of People Whose Notion Of A Satisfactory Future Is, In Fact, A Return To The Idealized Past.

There Is Absolutely No Point In Sitting Down To Write A Book Unless You Feel That You Must Write That Book, Or Else Go Mad, Or Die.

Tristan And Isolde Were Lucky To Die When They Did. They'd Have Been Sick Of All That Rubbish In A Year.

A Truly Great Book Should Be Read In Youth, Again In Maturity And Once More In Old Age, As A Fine Building Should Be Seen By Morning Light, At Noon And By Moonlight.

In The End, It Is Upon The Quality And Commitment Of Individuals That All Group Movements Depend.

But As A Skeptic I Am Dubious About Science As About Everything Else, Unless The Scientist Is Himself A Skeptic, And Few Of Them Are. The Stench Of Formaldehyde May Be As Potent As The Whiff Of Incense In Stimulating A Naturally Idolatrous Understanding.

Although I Am Almost Illiterate Mathematically, I Grasped Very Early In Life That Any One Who Can Count To Ten Can Count Upward Indefinitely If He Is Fool Enough To Do So.

It Is Lost, Lovely Child, Somewhere In The Ragbag That I Laughingly Refer To As My Memory.

Comparatively Few People Know What A Million Dollars Actually Is. To The Majority It Is A Gaseous Concept, Swelling Or Decreasing As The Occasion Suggests.

Everything Matters. The Universe Is Approximately Fifteen Billion Years Old, And I Swear That In All That Time, Nothing Has Ever Happened That Has Not Mattered, Has Not Contributed In Some Way To The Totality.

On The Whole, We Treat The Devil Shamefully, And The Worse We Treat Him The More He Laughs At Us.

It Is A Waste Of Time To Dissipate One's Moral Zeal In Disapproving Of Royal Persons Who Have Mistresses.

To Instruct Calls For Energy, And To Remain Almost Silent, But Watchful And Helpful, While Students Instruct Themselves, Calls For Even Greater Energy. To See Someone Fall (which Will Teach Him Not To Fall Again) When A Word From You Would Keep Him On His Feet But Ignorant Of An Important Danger, Is One Of The Tasks Of The Teacher That Calls For Special Energy, Because Holding In Is More Demanding Than Crying Out.

The Division Between Art And Deviousness And Crime Is Sometimes As Thin As A Cigarette Paper.

What We Call Luck Is The Inner Man Externalized. We Make Things Happen To Us.

The Wit Of A Graduate Student Is Like Champagne. Canadian Champagne.

Very Few [doctors] Are Men Of Science In Any Very Serious Sense; They're Men Of Technique.

I Never Heard Of Anyone Who Was Really Literate Or Who Ever Really Loved Books Who Wanted To Suppress Any Of Them.

Pessimism Is A Very Easy Way Out Because It Is A Short View Of Life. If You Look At What Is Happening Around Us Today, You Can't Help But Feel That Life Is A Terrible Complexity Of Problems. But If You Look Back A Few Thousand Years, You Realize That We Have Advanced Fantastically. If You Take A Long View, I Do Not See How You Can Be Pessimistic About The Future Of Mankind.

It Used To Be Fashionable For Authors To Have Their Pictures Taken With Dogs, But The Dogs Always Looked Like Models Hired From An Advertising Agency, And Probably Were.

I Still Have Trouble Identifying Grammatical Structures By Name, Though I Know Them As Matters Of Usage.

You're All Mad For Words. Words Are Just Farts From A Lot Of Fools Who Have Swallowed Too Many Books. Give Me Things!

I Think A Lot Of People Have Unreasonable Expectations Because They Never Stop To Consider What Life Actually Has To Offer Them. They're Always Looking For Some Great Epiphany From The Skies. They Never Stop To Consider The Fact Which Human Beings Find Hardest To Recognize: "maybe I'm Not Worthy Of An Epiphany.

Marriage Is A Framework To Preserve Friendship. It Is Valuable Because It Gives Much More Room To Develop Than Just Living Together. It Provides A Base From Which A Person Can Work At Understanding Himself And Another Person.

Nobody Who Looks As Though He Enjoyed Life Is Ever Called Distinguished, Though He Is A Man In A Million.

Let People Alone. Let Them Find Their Way. Let Them Find Their Level And You May Sometimes Be Delighted And Astonished At The Extraordinary High Level To Which They'll Rise If They're Let Alone.

As The Tragic Writer Rids Us Of What Is Petty And Ignoble In Our Nature, So Also The Humorist Rids Us Of What Is Cautious, Calculating, And Priggish--about Half Of Our Social Conscience, Indeed. Both Of Them Permit Us, In Blessed Moments Of Revelation, To Soar Above The Common Level Of Our Lives.

That Was What Stuck In The Craws Of All The Good Women Of Deptford: Mrs Dempster Had Not Been Raped, As A Decent Woman Would Have Been-no, She Had Yielded Because A Man Wanted Her. The Subject Was Not One That Could Be Freely Discussed Even Among Intimates, But It Was Understood Without Saying That If Women Began To Yield For Such Reasons As That, Marriage And Society Would Not Last Long. Any Man Who Spoke Up For Mrs Dempster Probably Believed In Free Love. Certainly He Associated Sex With Pleasure, And That Put Him In A Class With Filthy Thinkers Like Cece Athelstan.

Every Man Makes His Own Summer. The Season Has No Character Of Its Own, Unless One Is A Farmer With A Professional Concern For The Weather.

If We Seek The Pleasures Of Love, Passion Should Be Occasional, And Common Sense Continual.

Moderation, The Golden Mean, The Aristonmetron, Is The Secret Of Wisdom And Of Happiness. But It Does Not Mean Embracing An Unadventurous Mediocrity; Rather It Is An Elaborate Balancing Act, A Feat Of Intellectual Skill Demanding Constant Vigilance. Its Aim Is A Reconciliation Of Opposites.

"civilization Rests On Two Things," Said Hitzig; "the Discovery That Fermentation Produces Alcohol, And Voluntary Ability To Inhibit Defecation. And I Put It To You, Where Would This Splendidly Civilized Occasion Be Without Both?"

A Big Man Is Always Accused Of Gluttony, Whereas A Wizened Or Osseous Man Can Eat Like A Refugee At Every Meal, And No One Ever Notices His Greed.

Canada Is Not Really A Place Where You Are Encouraged To Have Large Spiritual Adventures.

I Object To Being Told That I Am Saving Daylight When My Reason Tells Me That I Am Doing Nothing Of The Kind... At The Back Of The Daylight Saving Scheme I Detect The Bony, Blue-fingered Hand Of Puritanism, Eager To Push People Into Bed Earlier, And Get Them Up Earlier, To Make Them Healthy, Wealthy And Wise In Spite Of Themselves.

It Was As Though She Was An Exile From A World That Saw Things Her Way

The Alexander Technique Keeps The Body Alive, At Ages When Many People Have Resigned Themselves To Irreversible Decline.

Are You Going To Be Just Kind Of A Walking Monument To A Job, Or Are You Going To Have Some Kind Of Really Significant Inner Life Of Your Own? Because The External Things The Job, The House, The This, The That Do Not Really Fill The Place Inside.

A Man Who Recognizes No God Is Probably Placing An Inordinate Value On Himself.

I Am Quite A Wise Old Bird, But I Am No Desert Hermit Who Can Only Prophesy When His Guts Are Knotted With Hunger. I Am Deep In The Old Man’s Puzzle, Trying To Link The Wisdom Of The Body With The Wisdom Of The Spirit Until The Two Are One.

The Great Charm Of Cats Is Their Rampant Egotism, Their Devil-may-care Attitude Toward Responsibility, Their Disinclination To Earn An Honest Dollar.

A Librettist Is A Mere Drudge In The World Of Opera.

Women Tell Men Things That Men Are Not Very Likely To Find Out For Themselves.

The Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name Has Become The Love That Won't Shut Up.

The Average Politician Goes Through A Sentence Like A Man Exploring A Disused Mine Shaft-blind, Groping, Timorous And In Imminent Danger Of Cracking His Shins On A Subordinate Clause Or A Nasty Bit Of Subjunctive.

Great Drama, Drama That May Reach The Alchemical Level, Must Have Dimension And Its Relevance Will Take Care Of Itself. Writing About Aids Rather Than The Cocktail Set, Or Possibly The Fairy Kingdom, Will Not Guarantee Importance. . . . The Old Comment That All Periods Of Time Are At An Equal Distance From Eternity Says Much, And Pondering On It Will Lead To Alchemical Theatre While Relevance Becomes Old Hat.

The Result Of A Single Action May Spread Like The Circles That Expand When A Stone Is Thrown Into A Pond, Until They Touch Places And People Unguessed At By The Person Who Threw The Stone.

The Problem For A Paracelsian Physician Like Me Is That I See Diseases As Disguises In Which People Present Me With Their Wretchedness.

Sometimes There Was A Serious Article On A Hot Topic, And I Especially Remember One By A Bishop Headed "is Nudity Salacious?" The Bishop Thought It Need Not Be, If Encountered In The Proper Spirit, But He Gave A Lot Of Enlightening Examples Of Conditions Under Which It Might Be, In His Word, "inflammatory." There Wasn't Much Nudity In Our Neck Of The Woods, And I Enjoyed That Article Tremendously.

Anybody Who Has Had Experience Of Poetesses Knows That They May Forgive A Punch On The Jaw, But Never A Suggestion That They Would Be Wiser To Give Up Versifying.

No People In The World Can Make You Feel So Small As The English.

The Pleasures Of Love Are For Those Who Are Hopelessly Addicted To Another Living Creature.

Living Creatures

The Most Original Thing A Writer Can Do Is Write Like Himself. It Is Also His Most Difficult Task.

This Is One Of The Cruelties Of The Theatre Of Life; We All Think Of Ourselves As Stars And Rarely Recognize It When We Are Indeed Mere Supporting Characters Or Even Supernumeraries.

He Was A Genius - That Is To Say, A Man Who Does Superlatively And Without Obvious Effort Something That Most People Cannot Do By The Uttermost Exertion Of Their Abilities.

If You're Going To Do Something That Looks Evil, Don't Smear It With Icing And Pretend It's Good; Just Bloody Well Do It And Keep Your Eyes Peeled.

There Is No Nonsense So Gross That Society Will Not, At Some Time, Make A Doctrine Of It And Defend It With Every Weapon Of Communal Stupidity.

Our Forebears Are Deserving Of Tribute For One Indisputable Reason, If For No Other: Without Them We Should Not Be Here. Let Us Recognize That We Are Not The Ultimate Triumph But Rather We Are Beads On A String. Let Us Behave With Decency To The Beads That Were Strung Before Us And Hope Modestly That The Beads That Come After Us Will Not Hold Us Of No Account Simply Because We Are Dead.

I Just Am A Canadian. It Is Not A Thing Which You Can Escape From. It Is Like Having Blue Eyes

The Love Of Truth Lies At The Root Of Much Humor.

My Curiosity Was In No Way Cruel. Deviations From The Commonplace Attracted Me Strongly, As They Still Do; And To Me The Hermaphrodite And The Living Skeleton Were Interesting For The Same Reason As Was Creatore, Or The Resplendent Guardsmen Of The Bands - Because Such People Did Not Often Come My Way, And I Hoped That They Might Impart Some Great Revelation To Me, Some Insight Which Would Help Me To A Clearer Understanding Of The World About Me.

Whether You Are Really Right Or Not Doesn't Matter; It's The Belief That Counts.

Literary Critics, However, Frequently Suffer From A Curious Belief That Every Author Longs To Extend The Boundaries Of Literary Art, Wants To Explore New Dimensions Of The Human Spirit, And If He Doesn't, He Should Be Ashamed Of Himself.

These Matters Require What I Think Of As The Shakespearean Cast Of Thought. That Is To Say, A Fine Credulity About Everything, Kept In Check By A Lively Skepticism About Everything.... It Keeps You Constantly Alert To Every Possibility.

Childhood May Have Periods Of Great Happiness, But It Also Has Times That Must Simply Be Endured. Childhood At Its Best Is A Form Of Slavery Tempered By Affection.

"there Is No Disputing About Tastes," Says The Old Saw. In My Experience There Is Little Else.

The Wild Hunt Is Known In All Celtic Countries; It Is A Huntsman With A Pack Of Hounds Who Is Seen Or Heard To Rush Through The Country. Those Who See Him Are Doomed To Die. The Writer Heard The Wild Hunt Quite Distinctly One Night In Wales Several Years Ago, But Has Not Suffered Any Ill Effects From It As Yet.

Too Much Traffic With A Quotation Book Begets A Conviction Of Ignorance In A Sensitive Reader. Not Only Is There A Mass Of Quotable Stuff He Never Quotes, But An Even Vaster Realm Of Which He Has Never Heard.

Did You Know That Puritanism Went Hand In Hand With Dirt, That Oliver Cromwell Put A 100 Per Cent Tax On Soap And That The Repeal Of The Soap Tax Was One Of The Most Popular Acts Of Charles Ii At His Restoration?

The First Principle, When You Don't Know Anything About The Subject Of A Thesis, Is To Let The Candidate Talk, Nodding Now And Then With An Ambiguous Smile. He Thinks You Know, And Are Counting His Mistakes, And It Unnerves Him... The Second Principle Of Conducting An Oral, ... Is To Pretend Ignorance, And Ask For Explanations Of Very Simple Points. Of Course Your Ignorance Is Real, But The Examinee Thinks You Are Being Subtle, And That He Is Making An Ass Of Himself, And This Rattles Him.

I Would Not For A Moment Have You Suppose That I Am One Of Those Idiots Who Scorns Science, Merely Because It Is Always Twisting And Turning, And Sometimes Shedding Its Skin, Like The Serpent That Is [the Doctors'] Symbol.

The Truth Is That Art Does Not Teach; It Makes You Feel, And Any Teaching That May Arise From The Feeling Is An Extra, And Must Not Be Stressed Too Much. In The Modern World, And In Canada As Much As Anywhere, We Are Obsessed With The Notion That To Think Is The Highest Achievement Of Mankind, But We Neglect The Fact That Thought Untouched By Feeling Is Thin, Delusive, Treacherous Stuff.

And I Say To You That If You Bring Curiosity To Your Work It Will Cease To Be Merely A Job And Become A Door Through Which You Enter The Best That Life Has To Give You.

I Cannot Imagine Any Boy Of Spirit Who Would Not Be Delighted To Play A Drunkard Even To Vomiting In Front Of His Sunday School. Indeed, The Vomiting Might Be The Chief Attraction Of The Role.

One Learns One’s Mystery At The Price Of One’s Innocence.

It Seemed To Me As If The Stones Sang, In The Strangest Voices, In The Language Of Ultima Thule.

I Don't Suppose God Laughs At The People Who Think He Doesn't Exist. He's Above Jokes. But The Devil Isn't. That's One Of His Most Endearing Qualities.

The Art Of The Quoter Is To Know When To Stop.

If I Had To Describe My Remarks This Evening Frankly As If I Were In Police Court And On Oath, So To Speak I Should Have To Call It A Ramble Over Several Subjects, Portions Of Which May Seem To You To Be Impudent, And Portions Of Which Will Be Ignorant, And Portions Of Which May Contrive To Be Both At Once.

The Ideal Companion In Bed Is A Good Book.

Here Are Some Homosexuals Whom We Would Do Well To Take Seriously.

In Too Many Modern Churches There Is No Emphasis On Theology At All. There Is A Kind Of Justification By Works Or By Keeping Up With Modern Trends Anything That Will Drag In A Few More People.

I Never Heard Of Anyone Who Was Really Literate Or Who Ever Really Loved Books Who Wanted To Suppress Any Of Them. Censors Only Read A Book With Great Difficulty, Moving Their Lips As They Puzzle Out Each Syllable, When Someone Tells Them That The Book Is Unfit To Read.

The Great Book For You Is The Book That Has The Most To Say To You At The Moment When You Are Reading. I Do Not Mean The Book That Is Most Instructive, But The Book That Feeds Your Spirit. And That Depends On Your Age, Your Experience, Your Psychological And Spiritual Need.

Canada, Having Few Indigenous Prejudices, Has Been Compelled To Import Them From Elsewhere, Duty-free, And It Is The Rare Canadian Who Is Not Shaken, At Some Time In The Year, By "old, Unhappy, Far-off Things / And Battles Long Ago", Like Wordsworth's Solitary Reaper. We Are A Nation Of Immigrants, And Not Happy In Our Minds.

Many A Promising Career Has Been Wrecked By Marrying The Wrong Sort Of Woman.

Never Harbor Grudges; They Sour Your Stomach And Do No Harm To Anyone Else.

Only In The Theatre Was It Possible To See The Performers And To Be Warmed By Their Personal Charm, To Respond To Their Efforts And To Feel Their Response To The Applause And Appreciative Laughter Of The Audience. It Had An Intimate Quality; Audience And Actors Conspired To Make A Little Oasis Of Happiness And Mirth Within The Walls Of The Theatre. Try As We Will, We Cannot Be Intimate With A Shadow On A Screen, Nor A Voice From A Box.

Do Not Suppose, However, That I Intend To Urge A Diet Of Classics On Anybody. I Have Seen Such Diets At Work. I Have Known People Who Have Actually Read All, Or Almost All, The Guaranteed Hundred Best Books. God Save Us From Reading Nothing But The Best.

May I Make A Suggestion, Hoping It Is Not An Impertinence? Write It Down: Write Down What You Feel. It Is Sometimes A Wonderful Help In Misery.

The Bible Takes Much Of Its Color From Whoever Is Reading It, And It Provides A Text To Support Almost Every Shade Of Opinion, However Preposterous.

Clarity Is Not A Characteristic Of The Human Spirit.

Characteristics

All Real Fantasy Is Serious. Only Faked Fantasy Is Not Serious. That Is Why It Is So Wrong To Impose Faked Fantasy On Children.

I Am Constantly Astonished By The People, Otherwise Intelligent, Who Think That Anything So Complex And Delicate As A Marriage Can Be Left To Take Care Of Itself. One Sees Them Fussing About All Sorts Of Lesser Concerns, Apparently Unaware That Side By Side With Them Often In The Same Bed A Human Creature Is Perishing From Lack Of Affection, Of Emotional Malnutrition.

Energy And Curiosity Are The Lifeblood Of Universities; The Desire To Find Out, To Uncover, To Dig Deeper, To Puzzle Out Obscurities, Is The Spirit Of The University, And It Is A Channelling Of That Unresting Curiosity That Holds Mankind Together.

To This Day I Am Indulgent Toward Orchestras That Are Trying To Lift Themselves In The World, While Critics Are Busy Assuring Them That They Are Not The Vienna Philharmonic And Never Will Be.

I Don't Think I Would Ever Write A Book With What Anybody Could Call Pornography In It, Because I Feel That Pornography Is A Cheat. It Is An Attempt To Provide Sexual Experience By Secondhand Means. Now Sex Is A Thing Which Has To Be Experienced Firsthand, If You Are Really Going To Understand It, And Pornography Is Rather Like Trying To Find Out About A Beethoven Symphony By Having Somebody Tell You About It And Perhaps Hum A Few Bars. It's Not The Same Thing. Sex Is Primarily A Question Of Relationships. Pornography Is A Do-it-yourself Kit--a Twenty-second Best.

Pornography Is Rather Like Trying To Find Out About A Beethoven Symphony By Having Somebody Tell You About It And Perhaps Hum A Few Bars.

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Recep Tayyip Erdogan

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