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I Never Knew Words Could Be So Confusing," Milo Said To Tock As He Bent Down To Scratch The Dog's Ear. "only When You Use A Lot To Say A Little," Answered Tock. Milo Thought This Was Quite The Wisest Thing He'd Heard All Day.

-Norton Juster

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I Never Knew Words

Norton Juster

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I Never Knew Words Could Be So Confusing," Milo Said To Tock As He Bent Down To Scratch The Dog's Ear. "only When You Use A Lot To Say A Little," Answered Tock. Milo Thought This Was Quite The Wisest Thing He'd Heard All Day.

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But I Suppose There's A Lot To See Everywhere, If Only You Keep Your Eyes Open.

What You Learn Today, For No Reason At All, Will Help You Discover All The Wonderful Secrets Of Tomorrow.

I Never Knew Words Could Be So Confusing," Milo Said To Tock As He Bent Down To Scratch The Dog's Ear. "only When You Use A Lot To Say A Little," Answered Tock. Milo Thought This Was Quite The Wisest Thing He'd Heard All Day.

Why, Did You Know That If A Beaver Two Feet Long With A Tail A Foot And A Half Long Can Build A Dam Twelve Feet High And Six Feet Wide In Two Days, All You Would Need To Build Boulder Dam Is A Beaver Sixty-eight Feet Long With A Fifty-one-foot Tail?" "where Would You Find A Beaver That Big?" Grumbled The Humbug As His Pencil Point Snapped. "i'm Sure I Don't Know," He Replied, "but If You Did, You'd Certainly Know What To Do With Him.

Time Is A Gift, Given To You, Given To Give You The Time You Need, The Time You Need To Have The Time Of Your Life.

I Think Kids Slowly Begin To Realize That What They're Learning Relates To Other Things They Know. Then Learning Starts To Get More And More Exciting

Do You Think It Will Rain? Milo: But I Thought You Were The Weather Man? No, I'm The Whether Man, For It Is More Important To Know Whether There Will Be Weather, Whether Than What The Weather Will Be.

It's Bad Enough Wasting Time Without Killing It.

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They Walked For A While, All Silent In Their Thoughts, Until They Reached The Car And Alec Drew A Fine Telescope From His Shirt And Handed It To Milo. "carry This With You On Your Journey," He Said Softly, "for There Is Much Worth Noticing That Often Escapes The Eye. Through It You Can See Everything From The Tender Moss In A Sidewalk Crack To The Glow Of The Farthest Star — And, Most Important Of All, You Can See Things As They Really Are, Not Just As They Seem To Be. It's My Gift To You.

What You Can Do Is Often Simply A Matter Of What You Will Do.

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In This Box Are All The Words I Know… Most Of Them You Will Never Need, Some You Will Use Constantly, But With Them You May Ask All The Questions Which Have Never Been Answered And Answer All The Questions Which Have Never Been Asked. All The Great Books Of The Past And All The Ones Yet To Come Are Made With These Words. With Them There Is No Obstacle You Cannot Overcome. All You Must Learn To Do Is Use Them Well And In The Right Places.

The Only Thing You Can Do Easily Is Be Wrong, And That's Hardly Worth The Effort.

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Perhaps You'd Care For A Synonym Bun," Suggested The Duke.

Expect Everything, I Always Say, And The Unexpected Never Happens.

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You See. . . It's Really Quite Strenuous Doing Nothing All Day, So Once A Week We Take A Holiday And Go Nowhere, Which Was Just Where We Were Going When You Came Along. Would You Care To Join Us?

You Must Never Feel Badly About Making Mistakes.

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That's The Way Most Everyone Gets Here. It's Really Quite Simple: Every Time You Decide Something Without Having A Good Reason, You Jump To Conclusions Whether You Like It Or Not. It's Such An Easy Trip To Make That I've Been Here Hundreds Of Times.

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A Good Book Written For Children Can Be Read By Adults

And Remember, Also," Added The Princess Of Sweet Rhyme, "that Many Places You Would Like To See Are Just Off The Map And Many Things You Want To Know Are Just Out Of Sight Or A Little Beyond Your Reach. But Someday You'll Reach Them All, For What You Learn Today, For No Reason At All, Will Help You Discover All The Wonderful Secrets Of Tomorrow.

But I Could Never Have Done It," He Objected, "without Everyone Else's Help." "that May Be True," Said Reason Gravely,"but You Had The Courage To Try; And What You Can Do Is Often Simply A Matter Of What You Will Do.

It Has Been A Long Trip," Said Milo, Climbing Onto The Couch Where The Princesses Sat; "but We Would Have Been Here Much Sooner If I Hadn't Made So Many Mistakes. I'm Afraid It's All My Fault.

So Many Things Are Possible Just As Long As You Don't Know They're Impossible.

I Don't Know Of Any Wrong Road To Dictionopolis, So If This Road Goes To Dictionopolis At All It Must Be The Right Road, And If It Doesn't It Must Be The Right Road To Somewhere Else, Because There Are No Wrong Roads To Anywhere. Do You Think It Will Rain?

Just As I Thought: Boys Are The Cause Of Everything.

Would It Be Possible For Me To See Something From Up There?" Asked Milo Politely. "you Could," Said Alec, "but Only If You Try Very Hard To Look At Things As An Adult Does." Milo Tried As Hard As He Could, And, As He Did, His Feet Floated Slowly Off The Ground Until He Was Standing In The Air Next To Alex Bings. He Looked Around Very Quickly And, An Instant Later, Crashed Back Down To The Earth Again. "interesting, Wasn't It?" Asked Alex. "yes, It Was," Agreed Milo, Rubbing His Head And Dusting Himself Off, "but I Think I'll Continue To See Things As A Child. It's Not So Far To Fall.

But Why Do Only Unimportant Things?" Asked Milo, Who Suddenly Remembered How Much Time He Spent Each Day Doing Them. "think Of All The Trouble It Saves," The Man Explained, And His Face Looked As If He'd Be Grinning An Evil Grin--if He Could Grin At All. "if You Only Do The Easy And Useless Jobs, You'll Never Have To Worry About The Important Ones Which Are So Difficult. You Just Won't Have The Time. For There's Always Something To Do To Keep You From What You Really Should Be Doing, And If It Weren't For That Dreadful Magic Staff, You'd Never Know How Much Time You Were Wasting.

Every Sunrise Gives You A New Beginning And A New Ending. Let This Morning Be A New Beginning To A Better Relationship And A New Ending To The Bad Memories. Its An Opportunity To Enjoy Life, Breathe Freely, Think And Love. Be Grateful For This Beautiful Day.

Whatever We Learn Has A Purpose And Whatever We Do Affects Everything And Everyone Else, If Even In The Tiniest Way. Why, When A Housefly Flaps His Wings, A Breeze Goes Round The World; When A Speck Of Dust Falls To The Ground, The Entire Planet Weighs A Little More; And When You Stamp Your Foot, The Earth Moves Slightly Off Its Course. Whenever You Laugh, Gladness Spreads Like The Ripples In The Pond; And Whenever You're Sad, No One Anywhere Can Be Really Happy. And It's Much The Same Thing With Knowledge, For Whenever You Learn Something New, The Whole World Becomes That Much Richer.

People Always Ask About My Influences, And They Cite A Bunch Of People I've Never Heard Of

And Now," He Continued, Speaking To Milo, "where Were You On The Night Of July 27?" "what Does That Have To Do With It?" Asked Milo. "it's My Birthday, That's What," Said The Policeman As He Entered "forgot My Birthday" In His Little Book. "boys Always Forget Other People's Birthdays.

Whether Or Not You Find Your Own Way, You're Bound To Find Some Way. If You Happen To Find My Way, Please Return It, As It Was Lost Years Ago. I Imagine By Now It's Quite Rusty.

There Are No Wrong Roads To Anywhere.

He Paused Again As A Tear Of Longing Rolled From Cheek To Lip With The Sweet-salty Taste Of An Old Memory.

...i'll Continue To See Things As A Child. It's Not So Far To Fall.

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Aha!" Interrupted Officer Shrift, Making Another Note In His Little Book. "just As I Thought: Boys Are The Cause Of Everything.

When You're Very Young And You Learn Something - A Fact, A Piece Of Information, Whatever - It Doesn't Connect To Anything.

We're Right Here On This Very Spot. Besides, Being Lost Is Never A Matter Of Not Knowing Where You Are; It's A Matter Of Not Knowing Where You Aren't - And I Don't Care At All About Where I'm Not.

You See, Years Ago I Was Just An Ordinary Bee Minding My Own Business, Smelling Flowers All Day, And Occasionally Picking Up Part-time Work In People's Bonnets. Then One Day I Realized That I'd Never Amount To Anything Without An Education And, Being Naturally Adept At Spelling, I Decided That—

How Can You See Something That Isn't There?" Yawned The Humbug, Who Wasn't Fully Awake Yet. "sometimes, It's Much Simpler Than Seeing Things That Are,"he Said. "for Instance, If Something Is There, You Can Only See It With Your Eyes Open, But If It Isn't There, You Can See It Just As Well With Your Eyes Closed. That's Why Imaginary Things Are Often Easier To See Than Real Ones." "then Where Is Reality?" Barked Tock. "right Here,"cried Alec, Waving His Arms.

And When I'm Writing, I Write A Lot Anyway. I Might Write Pages And Pages Of Conversation Between Characters That Don't Necessarily End Up In The Book, Or In The Story I'm Working On, Because They're Simply My Way Of Getting To Know The Characters

Why, Can You Imagine What Would Happen If We Named All The Twos Henry Or George Or Robert Or John Or Lots Of Other Things? You'd Have To Say Robert Plus John Equals Four, And If The Four's Name Were Albert, Things Would Be Hopeless.

There Are Good Books And There Are Bad Books, Period, That's The Distinction.

Expect Everything So That Nothing Comes Unexpected.

Is Everyone Who Lives In Ignorance Like You?" Asked Milo. "much Worse," He Said Longingly. "but I Don't Live Here. I'm From A Place Very Far Away Called Context.

But I Find The Best Things I Do, I Do When I'm Trying To Avoid Doing Something Else I'm Supposed To Be Doing. You Know, You're Working On Something. You Get Bugged, Or You Lose Your Enthusiasm Or Something. So You Turn To Something Else With An Absolute Vengeance

Perhaps Someday You Can Have One City As Easy To See As Illusions And As Hard To Forget As Reality.

One Of The Problems You Have When You Read With Kids Is That Once They Like Something They Want You To Read It A Hundred Times.

The Way You See Things Depends A Great Deal On Where You Look At Them From.

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And It's Much The Same Thing With Knowledge, For Whenever You Learn Something New, The Whole World Becomes That Much Richer.

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Just Because You Have A Choice, It Doesn't Mean That Any Of Them 'has' To Be Right.

I Received A Grant From The Ford Foundation To Write A Book For Kids About Urban Perception, Or How People Experience Cities, But I Kept Putting Off Writing It. Instead I Started To Write What Became The Phantom Tollbooth

If You Want Sense, You'll Have To Make It Yourself.

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...it's Just As Bad To Live In A Place Where What You Do See Isn't There As It Is To Live In One Where What You Don't See Is.

I Am The Terrible Trivium, Demon Of Petty Tasks And Worthless Jobs, Ogre Of Wasted Effort, And Monster Of Habit.

I Remember When I Was A Kid In School And Teachers Would Explain Things To Me About What I Read, And I'd Think, Where Did They Get That? I Didn't Read That In There. Later You Look At It And Think, That's Kind Of An Interesting Idea

Oh Dear, All Those Words Again," Thought Milo As He Climbed Into The Wagon With Tock And The Cabinet Members. "how Are You Going To Make It Move? It Doesn't Have A--" "be Very Quiet," Advised The Duke, "for It Goes Without Saying.

Have You Ever Heard The Wonderful Silence Just Before The Dawn? Or The Quiet And Calm Just As A Storm Ends? Or Perhaps You Know The Silence When You Haven't The Answer To A Question You've Been Asked, Or The Hush Of A Country Road At Night, Or The Expectant Pause In A Roomful Of People When Someone Is Just About To Speak, Or, Most Beautiful Of All, The Moment After The Door Closes And You're All Alone In The Whole House? Each One Is Different, You Know, And All Very Beautiful, If You Listen Carefully.

Have You Ever Heard A Blindfolded Octopus Unwrap A Cellophane-covered Bathtub?

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Expectations Is The Place You Must Always Go To Before You Get To Where You're Going.

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There Is Much Worth Noticing That Often Escapes The Eye.

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...it's Not Just Learning That's Important. It's Learning What To Do With What You Learn And Learning Why You Learn Things That Matters.

To A Child, And To An Adult, Too, What You Discover By Yourself, Or What You Think You Discover By Yourself, Is What Stays.

You Must Never Feel Badly About Making Mistakes ... As Long As You Take The Trouble To Learn From Them. For You Often Learn More By Being Wrong For The Right Reasons Than You Do By Being Right For The Wrong Reasons.

Why Not? That's A Good Reason For Almost Anything - A Bit Used Perhaps, But Still Quite Serviceable.

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Let Me Try Once More," Milo Said In An Effort To Explain. "in Other Words--" "you Mean You Have Other Words?" Cried The Bird Happily. "well, By All Means, Use Them. You're Certainly Not Doing Very Well With The Ones You Have Now.

No One Paid Any Attention To How Things Looked, And As They Moved Faster And Faster Everything Grew Uglier And Dirtier, And As Everything Grew Uglier And Dirtier They Moved Faster And Faster, And At Last A Very Strange Thing Began To Happen. Because Nobody Cared, The City Slowly Began To Disappear. Day By Day The Buildings Grew Fainter And Fainter, And The Streets Faded Away, Until At Last It Was Entirely Invisible. There Was Nothing To See At All.

Freedom Is Not A License For Chaos.

The Most Important Reason For Going From One Place To Another Is To See What's In Between, And They Took Great Pleasure In Doing Just That.

Everybody Is So Terribly Sensitive About The Things They Know Best.

And Some Looked Even More Like Each Other Than They Did Like Themselves.

If Something Is There, You Can Only See It With Your Eyes Open, But If It Isn't There, You Can See It Just As Well With Your Eyes Closed. That's Why Imaginary Things Are Often Easier To See Than Real Ones.

...it's Very Much Like Your Trying To Reach Infinity. You Know That It's There, You Just Don't Know Where-but Just Because You Can Never Reach It Doesn't Mean That It's Not Worth Looking For.

We Never Choose Which Words To Use, For As Long As They Mean What They Mean To Mean, We Don’t Care If They Make Sense Or Nonsense.

Things Which Are Equally Bad Are Also Equally Good. Try To Look At The Bright Side Of Things. - Humbug

I Know One Thing For Certain; It Is Much Harder To Tell Whether You Are Lost Than Whether You Were Lost, For, On Many Occasions, Where You Are Going Is Exactly Where You Are. On The Other Hand, If You Often Find That Where You've Been Is Not At All Where You Should Have Gone, And, Since It's Much More Difficult To Find Your Way Back From Someplace You've Never Left, I Suggest You Go There Immediately And Then Decide.

You Can't Improve Sound By Having Only Silence. The Problem Is To Use Each At The Proper Time.

You See, It's Really Quite Simple. A Simile Is Just A Mode Of Comparison Employing 'as' And 'like' To Reveal The Hidden Character Or Essence Of Whatever We Want To Describe, And Through The Use Of Fancy, Association, Contrast, Extension, Or Imagination, To Enlarge Our Understanding Or Perception Of Human Experience And Observation.

Sometimes I Find The Best Way Of Getting From One Place To Another Is Simply To Erase Everything And Begin Again.

The Mathemagician Nodded Knowingly And Stroked His Chin Several Times. “you’ll Find,” He Remarked Gently, “that The Only Thing You Can Do Easily Is Be Wrong, And That’s Hardly Worth The Effort.

You See, To Tall Men I'm A Midget, And To Short Men I'm A Giant; To The Skinny Ones I'm A Fat Man, And To The Fat Ones I'm A Thin Man.

You Can Swim All Day In The Sea Of Knowledge And Not Get Wet.

The Only Other Thing Which I Think Is Important Is: Don't Write A Book Or Start A Book With The Expectation Of Communicating A Message In A Very Important Way.

Since You Got Here By Not Thinking, It Seems Reasonable To Expect That, In Order To Get Out, You Must Start Thinking.

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I Think Really Good Books Can Be Read By Anybody.

But Just Because You Can Never Reach It, Doesn’t Mean That It’s Not Worth Looking For.

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You May Not See It Now," Said The Princess Of Pure Reason, Looking Knowingly At Milo's Puzzled Face, "but Whatever We Learn Has A Purpose And Whatever We Do Affects Everything And Everyone Else, If Even In The Tiniest Way.

They All Looked Very Much Like The Residents Of Any Small Valley To Which You've Never Been.

When He Was In School He Longed To Be Out, And When He Was Out He Longed To Be In. On The Way He Thought About Coming Home, And Coming Home He Thought About Going. Wherever He Was He Wished He Were Somewhere Else, And When He Got There He Wondered Why He'd Even Bothered.

And That's Why People No Longer Care Which Words They Use As Long As They Use Lots Of Them.

I Write Best In The Morning, And I Can Only Write For About Half A Day, That's About It.

A Slavish Concern For The Composition Of Words Is The Sign Of A Bankrupt Intellect. Be Gone, Odious Wasp! You Smell Of Decayed Syllables.

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For Instance," Said The Boy Again, "if Christmas Trees Were People And People Were Christmas Trees, We'd All Be Chopped Down, Put Up In The Living Room, And Covered In Tinsel, While The Trees Opened Our Presents." "what Does That Have To Do With It?" Asked Milo. "nothing At All," He Answered, "but It's An Interesting Possibility, Don't You Think?

Where Is The Sound?" Someone Hastily Scribbled On The Blackboard, And They All Waited Anxiously For The Reply. Milo Caught His Breath, Picked Up The Chalk, And Explained Simply, "it's On The Tip Of My Tongue.

Expectations Is The Place You Must Always Go To Before You Get To Where You're Going. Of Course, Some People Never Go Beyond Expectations, But My Job Is To Hurry Them Along Whether They Like It Or Not.

Many Of The Things Which Can Never Be, Often Are.

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Ah, This Is Fine," He Cried Triumphantly, Holding Up A Small Medallion On A Chain. He Dusted It Off, And Engraved On One Side Were The Words "why Not?" "that's A Good Reason For Almost Anything - A Bit Used Perhaps, But Still Quite Serviceable.

Does Everyone Grow The Way You Do?" Puffed Milo When He Had Caught Up. "almost Everyone," Replied Alec, And Then He Stopped A Moment And Thought. "now And Then, Though, Someone Does Begin To Grow Differently. Instead Of Down, His Feet Grow Up Towards The Sky. But We Do Our Best To Discourage Awkward Things Like That." "what Happens To Them?" Insisted Milo. "oddly Enough, They Often Grow Ten Times The Size Of Everyone Else," Said Alec Thoughtfully, "and I've Heard That They Walk Among The Stars." And With That He Skipped Off Once Again Toward The Waiting Woods.

Infinity Is A Dreadfully Poor Place. They Can Never Manage To Make Ends Meet.

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