Background Image
Currently, It Was Leading Him Through A Neighborhood That Was On The Downside Of Whatever Curve You Hoped You'd Bought Your Property On The Upside Of. Graffiti And Garbage Were Everywhere Here. They Were Everywhere In The City, If It Came To That, But Elsewhere The Garbage Was Better Quality, And The Graffiti Was Close To Being Correctly Spelled. The Whole Area Was Waiting For Something To Happen, Like A Really Bad Fire.
-Terry Pratchett
Please Wait....
Translating....

Currently, It Was Leading

Terry Pratchett
Currently, It Was Leading Him Through A Neighborhood That Was On The Downside Of Whatever Curve You Hoped You'd Bought Your Property On The Upside Of. Graffiti And Garbage Were Everywhere Here. They Were Everywhere In The City, If It Came To That, But Elsewhere The Garbage Was Better Quality, And The Graffiti Was Close To Being Correctly Spelled. The Whole Area Was Waiting For Something To Happen, Like A Really Bad Fire.
Views: 13
Topic
Fire
Curves
Cities
More From Terry Pratchett
Truth! Freedom! Justice! And A Hard-boiled Egg!
Eggs
Justice
Boiled Eggs
Some Of My Best Sources Are Ex-policemen, Just To Get A Feeling Of What It's Like To Be One. And It's Quite Different From Being A Civilian - Except, Of Course, That I Believe That Policemen Are Just Special Sorts Of Civilians. Things Like How Hard It Is To Hold Someone That Doesn't Want To Be Held. This Is The Kind Of Thing That Is Worth Knowing.
Believe
Knowing
Feelings
A Horse's Skull Always Looks Scary, Even If Someone Has Put Lipstick On It.
Horse
Skulls
Scary
Priests Were Metal-reinforced Overshoes. They Saved Your Soles. This Is An Assassin Joke.
Assassins
Priests
Metals
What Is Magic? There Is The Wizard's Explanation... Wizards Talk About Candles, Circles, Planets, Stars, Bananas, Chants, Runes And The Importance Of Having At Least Four Good Meals Every Day.
Stars
Circles
Magic
Mr Lipwig, There's A Lady In The Hall To See You And We've Thanked Her For Not Smoking Three Times And She's Still Doing It!
Smoking
Three
Halls
Tiffany Has Been Apprenticing As A Witch By Visiting People In Need With Her Mentor. After Meeting With One Particularly Sad Case, She Tells Her Mentor, "it Shouldn't Be Like This." Her Mentor Replies, "there Isn't A Way Things Should Be. There's Just What Happens, And What We Do.
People
Mentor
Needs
It's Never A Good Idea To Ask A Man On A Tight-rope How He Keeps His Balance: A) He Would Probably Fall Off And B) He Probably Doesn't Know What The Muscles Are Called In Any Case.
Fall
Men
Ideas
You Have Reached The End Of Cake
Cake
Ends
Sam Vimes
I Stroll Along, Talk, I Sign Books, People Buy Me Drinks, I Forget Where My Hotel Is, I Get Lost And Fall Into Some Local Body Of Water... Done It Hundreds Of Times.
Book
Fall
People
I'm Mean And Turf And I'm Mean And Turf And I'm Mean And Turf And I'm Mean And Turf, And Me An' My Friends Can Walk Towards You With Our Hats On Backwards In A Menacing Way, Yo!
Mean
Way
Hats
Please Give Us A Simple Answer, So That We Don't Have To Think, Because If We Think, We Might Find Answers That Don't Fit The Way We Want The World To Be
Simple
Thinking
Giving
Ankh-morpork! Pearl Of Cities! This Is Not A Completely Accurate Description, Of Course — It Was Not Round And Shiny — But Even Its Worst Enemies Would Agree That If You Had To Liken Ankh-morpork To Anything, Then It Might As Well Be A Piece Of Rubbish Covered With The Diseased Secretions Of A Dying Mollusc.
Worst Enemy
Cities
Dying
That, Lad," He Said Proudly, "was Some Of The Worst Poetry I Have Heard For A Long Time. It Was Offensive To The Ear And A Torrrture To The Soul....we'll Make A Gonnagle Out Of Ye Yet!
Long
Soul
Ears
I Decided At School That The Only Sensible Way To Make A Living By Arranging Words In A Pleasing Order Was By Working On Newspapers, Because You Got Paid At The End Of The Week Or The End Of The Month.
School
Order
Way
What's A Philosopher?' Said Brutha. Someone Who's Bright Enough To Find A Job With No Heavy Lifting,' Said A Voice In His Head.
Jobs
Voice
Philosopher
Freedom Without Limits Is Just A Word.
Limits
The Storm Was Really Giving It Everything It Had. This Was Its Big Chance. It Had Spent Years Hanging Around The Provinces, Putting In Some Useful Work As A Squall, Building Up Experience, Making Contacts, Occasionally Leaping Out On Unsuspecting Shepherds Or Blasting Quite Small Oak Trees. Now An Opening In The Weather Had Given It An Opportunity To Strut Its Hour, And It Was Building Up Its Role In The Hope Of Being Spotted By One Of The Big Climates.
Opportunity
Years
Building Up
Thou Shalt Not Submit Thy God To Market Forces.
Force
Submit
And Sin, Young Man, Is When You Treat People Like Things.
Men
People
Sin
You Can't Trust Folk Songs. They Always Sneak Up On You.
Song
Folks
Folk Songs
Good Or Bad, Do It As You. Too Many Lies And There's No Truth To Go Back To.
Lying
When She Spoke Again It Was In The Thin, Careful And Above All Brave Voice Of Someone Who Has Pulled Themselves Together Despite Overwhelming Odds But Might Let Go Again At Any Moment.
Letting Go
Odds
Voice
What Would Have Happened If You Hadn't Saved Him? "yes! The Sun Would Have Risen Just The Same, Yes?" No "oh, Come On. You Can't Expect Me To Believe That. It's An Astronomical Fact." The Sun Would Not Have Risen. ... "really? Then What Would Have Happened, Pray?" A Mere Ball Of Flaming Gas Would Have Illuminated The World.
Believe
Balls
World
Any Sensible Ruler Would Have Killed Off Leonard, And Lord Vetinari Was Extremely Sensible And Often Wondered Why He Had Not Done So. He'd Decided That It Was Because, Imprisoned In The Priceless, Inquiring Amber Of Leonard's Massive Mind, Underneath That Bright Investigative Genius Was A Kind Of Willful Innocence That Might In Lesser Men Be Called Stupidity. It Was The Seat And Soul Of That Force Which, Down The Millennia, Had Caused Mankind To Stick Its Fingers In The Electric Light Socket Of The Universe And Play With The Switch To See What Happened - And Then Be Very Surprised When It Did.
Men
Light
Play
The Singers All Loathe The Sight Of One Another, The Chorus Despises The Singers, They Both Hate The Orchestra, And Everyone Fears The Conductor; The Staff On One Prompt Side Won't Talk To The Staff On The Opposite Prompt Side, The Dancers Are All Crazed From Hunger In Any Case.
Hate
Sight
Opposites
Humans Need Fantasy In Order To Be Human.
Healing
Order
Needs
The Librarian Considered Matters For A While. So…a Dwarf And A Troll. He Preferred Both Species To Humans. For One Thing, Neither Of Them Were Great Readers. The Librarian Was, Of Course, Very Much In Favor Of Reading In General, But Readers In Particular Got On His Nerves. There Was Something, Well, Sacrilegious About The Way They Kept Taking Books Off The Shelves And Wearing Out The Words By Reading Them. He Liked People Who Loved And Respected Books, And The Best Way To Do That, In The Librarian’s Opinion, Was To Leave Them On The Shelves Where Nature Intended Them To Be.
Book
Reading
Dwarves
I'll Be More Enthusiastic About Encouraging Thinking Outside The Box When There's Evidence Of Any Thinking Going On Inside It.
Life
Encouraging
Beautiful
The Entire Universe Has Been Neatly Divided Into Things To (a) Mate With, (b) Eat, (c) Run Away From, And (d) Rocks.
Funny
Running
Rocks
She Got On With Her Education. In Her Opinion, School Kept On Trying To Interfere With It.
School
Trying
Opinion
What I've Always Said Was, Hang In There, Let Me Write What I Want To Write, And You'll Probably Like It.
Writing
Want
Said
The Key To Winning, As Always, Was Looking As If You Had Every Right, Nay, Duty To Be Where You Were. It Helped If You Could Also Suggest In Every Line Of Your Body That No One Else Had Any Rights To Be Doing Anything, Anywhere, Whatsoever.
Winning
Keys
Rights
If I Knew That I Could Die, I Would Live. My Life, My Death, My Choice.
Choices
Living My Life
Dies
Open Your Eyes And Then Open Your Eyes Again.
Eye
Tomorrow Is The First Day Of The Rest Of Our Lives.
Good Morning
Beauty
Live Life
Creatures Which, Lacking Mankind's Superior Brain Power, Did Not Concern Themselves With Finding Someone To Blame, And Instead Tried To Find Someone To Eat.
Brain
Blame
Finding Someone
Time Was Something That Largely Happened To Other People; He Viewed It In The Same Way That People On The Shore Viewed The Sea. It Was Big And It Was Out There, And Sometimes It Was An Invigorating Thing To Dip A Toe Into, But You Couldn't Live In It All The Time. Besides, It Always Made His Skin Wrinkle.
Wrinkles
Sea
People
The People Who Guard The Rainbow Don't Like Those Who Get In The Way Of The Sun.
People
Rainbow
Way
The Trouble With Life Was That You Didn’t Get A Chance To Practice Before Doing It For Real.
Real
Practice
Chance
I'd Rather Be A Rising Ape Than A Falling Angel.
Fall
Angel
Rising
The People Of Ankh-morpork Had A Straightforward, No-nonsense Approach To Entertainment, And While They Were Looking Forward To Seeing A Dragon Slain, They'd Be Happy To Settle Instead For Seeing Someone Being Baked Alive In His Own Armour. You Didn't Get The Chance Every Day To See Someone Baked Alive In Their Own Armour. It Would Be Something For The Children To Remember.
Children
Dragons
People
Writing Is The Most Fun You Can Have By Yourself.
Sex
Fun
Writing
In Genua, Someone Set Out To Make Dreams Come True. Remember Some Of Your Dreams?
Dream
Remember
Dreams Come True
I Am A Technophile, So There Is No Such Thing As A First Draft. The First Draft Plunges On, And About A Quarter Of The Way Through It I Realise I'm Doing Things Wrong, So I Start Rewriting It. What You Call The First Draft Becomes Rather Like A Caterpillar; It Is Progressing Fairly Slowly, But There Is Movement Up And Down Its Whole Length, The Whole Story Is Being Changed. I Call This Draft Zero, Telling Myself How The Story Is Supposed To Go.
Zero
Progress
Stories
Next Comes The Realist Phase ("after All, From A Purely Geometrical Point Of View A Cat Is Only A Tube With A Door At The Top.")
Cat
Doors
Views
People Couldn't Become Truly Holy, He Said, Unless They Also Had The Opportunity To Be Definitively Wicked.
Opportunity
People
Temptation
They Know That People Need Witches; They Need The Unofficial People Who Understand The Difference Between Right And Wrong, And When Right Is Wrong And When Wrong Is Right. The World Needs The People Who Work Around The Edges. They Need The People Who Can Deal With The Little Bumps And Inconveniences. And Little Problems. After All, We Are Almost All Human. Almost All Of The Time.
Differences
People
Needs
And, As Always Happens, And Happens Far Too Soon, The Strange And Wonderful Becomes A Memory And A Memory Becomes A Dream. Tomorrow It's Gone.
Dream
Memories
Loss
Gods Prefer Simple, Vicious Games, Where You Do Not Achieve Transcendence But Go Straight To Oblivion; A Key To The Understanding Of All Religion Is That A God's Idea Of Amusement Is Snakes And Ladders With Greased Rungs.
Simple
Keys
Games
Questions Don't Have To Make Sense, Vincent," Said Miss Susan. "but Answers Do.
Missing
Answers
Said
Building A Temple Didn't Mean You Believed In Gods, It Just Meant You Believed In Architecture.
Mean
Temples
Architecture
Sometimes I Feel That The World Is Made Up Of Sensible People Who Know The Plot And Bloody Idiots Who Don't.
People
Plot
World
Veil, You See, If I Vas To Say Something Portentous Like "zer Dark Eyes Of Zer Mind" Back Home In Uberwald, Zer Would Be A Sudden Crash Of Thunder,' Said Otto. 'and If I Vas To Point At A Castle On A Towering Crag And Say "yonder Is . . . Zer Castle" A Volf Would Be Bound To Howl Mournfully.' He Sighed. 'in Zer Old Country, Zer Scenery Is Psychotropic And Knows Vot Is Expected Of It. Here, Alas, People Just Look At You In A Funny Vay.
Country
Home
Eye
The Second Mouse Gets The Cheese!
Funny
Witty
Iron
The Theater Troubled Her. It Had A Magic Of Its Own, One That Didn’t Belong To Her, One That Wasn’t In Her Control. It Changed The World, And Said Things Were Otherwise Than They Were. And It Was Worse Than That. It Was Magic That Didn’t Belong To Magical People. It Was Commanded By Ordinary People, Who Didn’t Know The Rules. They Altered The World Because It Sounded Better.
People
Magic
Ordinary
Ridcully Was To Management What King Herod Was To The Bethlehem Playgroup Association.
Kings
Association
Management
The Auditors Fluttered Anxiously. And, As Always Happens In Their Species When Something Goes Radically Wrong And Needs Fixing Instantly, They Settled Down To Try To Work How Who Was To Blame.
Trying
Needs
Auditors
The Truth Is That Even Big Collections Of Ordinary Books Distort Space, As Can Readily Be Proved By Anyone Who Has Been Around A Really Old-fashioned Secondhand Bookshop, One That Looks As Though They Were Designed By M. Escher On A Bad Day And Has More Stairways Than Storeys And Those Rows Of Shelves Which End In Little Doors That Are Surely Too Small For A Full-sized Human To Enter. The Relevant Equation Is: Knowledge = Power = Energy = Matter = Mass; A Good Bookshop Is Just A Genteel Black Hole That Knows How To Read.
Truth
Book
Bad Day
He Talks Pretty Big For A Gutter Wizard," He Muttered. "you Don't Understand At All," Said The Wizard Wearily. "i'm So Scared Of You My Spine Has Turned To Jelly, It's Just That I'm Suffering From An Overdose Of Terror Right Now. I Mean, When I've Got Over That Then I'll Have Time To Be Decently Frightened Of You.
Mean
Suffering
Jelly
Probably The Last Man Who Knew How It Worked Had Been Tortured To Death Years Before. Or As Soon As It Was Installed. Killing The Creator Was A Traditional Method Of Patent-protection.
Men
Years
Patents
But…but You Can’t Treat Religion As A Sort Of Buffet, Can You? I Mean, You Can’t Say Yes Please, I’ll Have Some Of The Celestial Paradise And A Helping Of The Divine Plan But Go Easy On The Kneeling And None Of The Prohibition Of Images, They Give Me Wind. Its Table D´hôte Or Nothing, Otherwise…well, It Would Be Silly.
Silly
Mean
Wind
Real Children Do Not Go Hoppity Skip Unless They Are On Drugs.
Children
Real
Drug
You Fear To Die? "it's Not That I Don't Want... I Mean, I've Always...it's Just That Life Is A Habit That's Hard To Break.
Life
Mean
Want
He Had Never Been Interested In Stories At Any Age, And Had Never Quite Understood The Basic Concept. He'd Never Read A Work Of Fiction All The Way Through. He Did Remember, As A Small Boy, Being Really Annoyed At The Depiction Of Hickory Dickory Dock In A Rag Book Of Nursery Rhymes Because The Clock In The Drawing Was Completely Wrong For The Period.
Book
Boys
Drawing
A Number Of Religions In Ankh-morpork Still Practiced Human Sacrifice, Except That They Didn't Really Need To Practice Any More Because They Had Got So Good At It.
Sacrifice
Practice
Numbers
The Space Between The Young Reader’s Eyeballs And The Printed Page Is A Holy Place And Officialdom Should Trample All Over It At Their Peril.’
Space
Holy Places
Pages
There Are Times When The Best Writing You Can Do Is To Go For A Walk Or Drive, A Long Drive Is Ideal.
Writing
Long
Walks
He Was The Sort Of Person Who Stood On Mountaintops During Thunderstorms In Wet Copper Armour Shouting 'all The Gods Are Bastards.'
Thunderstorm
Shouting
Copper
It Was Long After Midnight And The Stars Looked Damp And Chilly; The Air Was Full Of The Busy Silence Of The Night, Which Is Created By Hundreds Of Small Furry Things Treading Very Carefully In The Hope Of Finding Dinner While Avoiding Being The Main Course.
Stars
Night
Air
Sometimes You Had To Take A Look At Yourself And Then Look Away.
Looks
Sometimes
Look At Yourself
Peace?' Said Vetinari. 'ah, Yes, Defined As Period Of Time To Allow For Preparation For The Next War.
War
Preparation
Next
Books Bend Space And Time. One Reason The Owners Of Those Aforesaid Little Rambling, Poky Secondhand Bookshops Always Seem Slightly Unearthly Is That Many Of Them Really Are, Having Strayed Into This World After Taking A Wrong Turning In Their Own Bookshops In Worlds Where It Is Considered Commendable Business Practice To Wear Carpet Slippers All The Time And Open Your Shop Only When You Feel Like It.
Book
Practice
Space
Truthfully, Without Over-egging It, As I Often Do, The Library And Journalism, Those Things Made Me Who I Am.
Who I Am
Library
Journalism
You Have To Start Out Learning To Believe The Little Lies. "so We Can Believe The Big Ones?" Yes. Justice, Mercy, Duty. That Sort Of Thing.
Lying
Believe
Justice
I Know That I Am A Small, Weak Man, But I Have Amassed A Large Library; I Dream Of Dangerous Places.
Dream
Men
Weak Man
Do You Know How Wizards Like To Be Buried?" "yes!" "well, How?" Granny Weatherwax Paused At The Bottom Of The Stairs. "reluctantly.
Wizards
Stairs
Buried
By The Time You Write The Last Page You Have Done Half The Book. The Other Half Tends To Get Done In About Five Weeks; I Do Several Drafts, Very, Very Furiously Rewriting. I Literally Do More Or Less Nothing Else And I Stick With It And Go Through It And I Begin To Hate It.
Hate
Book
Writing
Voodoo Is A Very Interesting Religion For The Whole Family, Even Those Members Of It Who Are Dead.
Interesting
Good Omens
Whole Family
He’s Bound To Have Done Something,” Nobby Repeated. In This He Was Echoing The Patrician’s View Of Crime And Punishment. If There Was A Crime, There Should Be Punishment. If The Specific Criminal Should Be Involved In The Punishment Process Then This Was A Happy Accident, But If Not Then Any Criminal Would Do, And Since Everyone Was Undoubtedly Guilty Of Something, The Net Result Was That, In General Terms, Justice Was Done.
Views
Punishment
Justice
I Do Not In Fact Use Many Puns. Certainly There Are Far Fewer Than People Believe. But I Suspect The Ones I Do Occasionally Use Tend To Hang Around In People's Memories For A While.
Memories
Believe
People
Their Families Cordially Detested One Another.
While A Book Has Got To Be Worthwhile From The Point Of View Of The Reader It's Got To Be Worthwhile From The Point Of View Of The Writer As Well.
Book
Views
Worthwhile
If Women Were As Good As Men They'd Be A Lot Better!
Men
Ifs
It Was Octarine, The Colour Of Magic. It Was Alive And Glowing And Vibrant And It Was The Undisputed Pigment Of The Imagination, Because Wherever It Appeared It Was A Sign That Mere Matter Was A Servant Of The Powers Of The Magical Mind. It Was Enchantment Itself. But Rincewind Always Thought It Looked A Sort Of Greenish-purple.
Glowing
Purple
Imagination
Things Have No Power That Humans Don't Put There.
Honesty
Humans
It Was Said That Life Was Cheap In Ankh-morpork. This Was Of Course, Completely Wrong. Life Was Often Very Expensive; You Could Get Death For Free.
Pyramids
Life And Death
Appreciate Life
Perhaps, If You Knew You Were Going To Die, Your Senses Crammed In As Much Detail As They Could While They Still Had The Chance.
Details
Chance
Stills
Smaller-than-medium-jock-but-bigger-than-wee-jock-jock
Jocks
Bigger
Mediums
There Was Once A Caustic Comment From Someone Suggesting I Was Breeding A New Race. Fans From Different Countries Have Married, Amazing Things Like That. I've Been To Some Of The Weddings. I Went To One Here The Other Day, A Pagan Ceremony.
Country
Race
Fans
Wisdom Comes From Experience. Experience Is Often A Result Of Lack Of Wisdom.
Life
Wisdom Experience
Wisdom And Experience
It Is Important That We Know Where We Come From, Because If You Do Not Know Where You Come From, Then You Don't Know Where You Are, And If You Don't Know Where You Are, You Don't Know Where You're Going. And If You Don't Know Where You're Going, You're Probably Going Wrong.
Important
Where We Come
Where You Come
Evil In General Does Not Sleep, And Therefore Doesn't See Why Anyone Else Should.
Sleep
Evil
Doe
The Conversation Of Human Beings Seldom Interested Him, But It Crossed His Mind That The Males And Females Always Got Along Best When Neither Actually Listened Fully To What The Other One Was Saying.
Mind
Males
Female
The Labyrinth Of Ephebe Is Ancient And Full Of One Hundred And One Amazing Things You Can Do With Hidden Springs, Razor-sharp Knives, And Falling Rocks.
Spring
Fall
Rocks
If You Put Butter And Salt On It, It Tastes Like Salty Butter.
Taste
Salt
Discworld
But Then Science Is Nothing But A Series Of Questions That Lead To More Questions.
Series
A World Like That, Which Exists Only Because The Gods Enjoy A Joke, Must Be A Place Where Magic Can Survive. And Sex Too, Of Course.
Sex
Magic
World
If You Were Going To Be Successful In The World Of Crime, You Needed A Reputation For Honesty.
Honesty
Successful
World
The Shortest Unit Of Time In The Multiverse Is The New York Second, Defined As The Period Of Time Between The Traffic Lights Turning Green And The Cab Behind You Honking.
New York
Light
Green
The Mountains Of Madness Have Many Little Plateau Of Sanity.
Mountain
Littles
Madness
In The End The Problem Isn't That You Have The Wrong Sort Of Government For The People, But That You Have The Wrong Sort Of People.
Government
People
Problem
The Yen Buddhists Are The Richest Religious Sect In The Universe. They Hold That The Accumulation Of Money Is A Great Evil And A Burden To The Soul. They Therefore, Regardless Of Personal Hazard, See It As Their Unpleasant Duty To Acquire As Much As Possible In Order To Reduce The Risk To Innocent People.
Religious
Buddhist
Order
There's No Justice, Said Mort. Just Us.
Justice
Said
The Landscape Was Snow And Green Ice On Broken Mountains. These Weren't Old Mountains, Worn Down By Time And Weather And Full Of Gentle Ski Slopes, But Young, Sulky, Adolescent Mountains. They Held Secret Ravines And Merciless Crevices. One Yodel Out Of Place Would Attract, Not The Jolly Echo Of A Lonely Goatherd, But Fifty Tons Of Express-delivery Snow.
Lonely
Echoes
Ice
I've Often Felt Depressed; Everyone Feels Depressed.
Feels
Felt
Reality Is Not Digital, An On-off State, But Analog. Something Gradual. In Other Words, Reality Is A Quality That Things Possess In The Same Way That They Possess, Say, Weight. Some People Are More Real Than Others, For Example. It Has Been Estimated That There Are Only About Five Hundred Real People On Any Given Planet, Which Is Why They Keep Unexpectedly Running Into One Another All The Time.
Running
Real
People
If You Want To Change A Whole People, Then You Start With The Girls. It Stands To Reason: They Learn Faster, And They Pass On What They Learn To Their Children.
Girl
Children
People
I Intend, Before The Endgame Looms, To Die Sitting In A Chair In My Own Garden With A Glass Of Brandy In My Hand And Thomas Tallis On The Ipod. Oh, And Since This Is England, I Had Better Add, "if Wet, In The Library." Who Could Say That This Is Bad?
Garden
Glasses
Hands
Tv People In The Uk... I'm Getting On A Lot Better With Them.
People
Tvs
Evolution Was Far More Thrilling To Me Than The Biblical Account. Who Would Not Rather Be A Rising Ape Than A Falling Angel? To My Juvenile Eyes, Darwin Was Proved True Every Day. It Doesn't Take Much To Make Us Flip Back Into Monkeys Again.
Fall
Eye
Angel
Of Course, Ankh-morpork's Citizens Had Always Claimed That The River Water Was Incredibly Pure. Any Water That Had Passed Through So Many Kidneys, They Reasoned, Had To Be Very Pure Indeed.
Rivers
Water
Citizens
... When Your Name Is Really And Truly Percy Blakeney, Pronounced 'black-knee', And You Still Have Bad Acne In Your Twenties, You Accept Pimple As A Nickname And Are Grateful That It Wasn't Anything Worse.
Grateful
Names
Black
Gravity Is A Habit That Is Hard To Shake Off.
Dignity
Habit
Discworld
It Was Then That Marvin Got Religion. Not The Quiet, Personal Kind, That Involves Doing Good Deeds And Living A Better Life; Not Even The Kind That Involves Putting On A Suit And Ringing People's Doorbells; But The Kind That Involves Having Your Own Tv Network And Getting People To Send You Money.
People
Deeds
Suits
And It Came To Pass That In Time The Great God Om Spake Unto Brutha, The Chosen One: "psst!
Discworld
Small Gods
Chosen One
You Can't Make People Happy By Law. If You Said To A Bunch Of Average People Two Hundred Years Ago "would You Be Happy In A World Where Medical Care Is Widely Available, Houses Are Clean, The World's Music And Sights And Foods Can Be Brought Into Your Home At Small Cost, Traveling Even 100 Miles Is Easy, Childbirth Is Generally Not Fatal To Mother Or Child, You Don't Have To Die Of Dental Abscesses And You Don't Have To Do What The Squire Tells You" They'd Think You Were Talking About The New Jerusalem And Say "yes."
Mother
Children
Home
If You Don't Know When To Be A Human Being, You Don't Know When To Be A Witch.
Witch
Humans
Ifs
You Can't Remember The Plot Of The Dr Who Movie Because It Didn't Have One, Just A Lot Of Plot Holes Strung Together. It Did Have A Lot Of Flashing Lights, Though.
Light
Together
Drs
I Know Loads Of Coppers And Dealt With Them A Lot When I Was A Journalist - Coppers Are Easy To Write For; They Tend To Run On Rails.
Running
Writing
Easy
You Haven't Really Been Anywhere Until You've Got Back Home.
Home
Back Home
Havens
Certainly The Americans Want To Buy Rights, But Have No Idea What To Do With Them.
Ideas
Rights
Want
Inside Every Lump Of Coal There's A Diamond Waiting To Get Out.
Waiting
Coal
Diamond
Of Course, Like All The Informal Inhabitants Of The University The Roaches Were A Little Unusual, But There Was Something Particularly Unpleasant About The Sound Of Billions Of Very Small Feet Hitting The Stones In Perfect Time. Rincewind Stepped Gingerly Over The Marching Column. The Librarian Jumped It. The Luggage, Of Course, Followed Them With A Noise Like Someone Tapdancing Over A Bag Of Crisps.
Feet
Perfect
Sound
Divers Alarums And Excursions', She Read, Uncertainly. 'that Means Lots Of Terrible Happenings, Said Magrat. 'you Always Put That In Plays.' Alarums And What?', Said Nanny Ogg, Who Hadn't Been Listening. Excursions', Said Magrat Patienly. Oh.' Nanny Ogg Brightened A Bit. 'the Seaside Would Be Nice,' She Said. Oh Do Shut Up, Gytha,' Said Granny Weatherwax. 'they're Not For You. They're Only For Divers, Like It Says. Probably So They Can Recover From All Them Alarums.
Nice
Mean
Play
Sometimes The Crime Follows The Punishment, Which Only Serves To Prove The Foresight Of The Great God." "that's What My Grandmother Used To Say," Said Brutha Automatically. "indeed? I Would Like To Know More About This Formidable Lady." "she Used To Give Me A Thrashing Every Morning Because I Would Certainly Do Something To Deserve It During The Day," Said Brutha. "a Most Complete Understanding Of The Nature Of Mankind.
Morning
Grandmother
Punishment
Other People Salted Away Money For Their Old Age, But Nanny Preferred To Accumulate Memories.
Memories
People
Age
Cutangle: While I'm Still Confused And Uncertain, It's On A Much Higher Plane, D'you See, And At Least I Know I'm Bewildered About The Really Fundamental And Important Facts Of The Universe. Treatle: I Hadn't Looked At It Like That, But You're Absolutely Right. He's Really Pushed Back The Boundaries Of Ignorance. They Both Savoured The Strange Warm Glow Of Being Much More Ignorant Than Ordinary People, Who Were Only Ignorant Of Ordinary Things.
Confused
Ignorance
People
Lord Vetinari Lifted An Eyebrow With The Care Of One Who, Having Found A Piece Of Caterpillar In His Salad, Raises The Rest Of The Lettuce.
Eyebrows
Pieces
Care
Mister Teatime Had A Truly Brilliant Mind, But It Was Brilliant Like A Fractured Mirror, All Marvellous Facets And Rainbows But, Ultimately, Also Something That Was Broken.
Mirrors
Broken
Rainbow
Actors, Said Granny, Witheringly. As If The World Weren't Full Of Enough History Without Inventing More.
Art
Actors
World
Guilt Was The Grease In Which The Wheels Of The Authority Turned.
Grease
Guilt
Wheels
All Assassins Had A Full-length Mirror In Their Rooms, Because It Would Be A Terrible Insult To Anyone To Kill Them When You Were Badly Dressed.
Mirrors
Pyramids
Insulting
The People Who Really Run Organizations Are Usually Found Several Levels Down, Where It Is Still Possible To Get Things Done.
Running
Organization
People
I Don't See What's So Triffic About Creating People As People And Then Gettin' Upset 'cos They Act Like People.
Creating
People
Upset
I Read The 'old Testament' All The Way Through When I Was About 13 And Was Horrified. A Few Months Afterwards I Read 'the Origin Of Species', Hallucinating Very Mildly Because I Was In Bed With Flu At The Time. Despite That, Or Because Of That, It All Made Perfect Sense.
Perfect
Bed
Flu
It Was A Backwards Memory Of An Event In His Future So Terrifying That It Had Generated Harmonics Of Fear All The Way Along His Lifeline.
Memories
Way
Events
Sheep Are Stupid, And Have To Be Driven. But Goats Are Intelligent, And Need To Be Led.
Funny
Stupid
Animal
Silverfish Looked Down. "oh. Are You A Dwarf?" Cuddy Gave Him A Blank Stare. "are You A Giant?" He Said. "me? Of Course Not!" "ah. Then I Must Be A Dwarf, Yes."
Dwarves
Giants
Blank
Inside Every Sane Person There's A Madman Struggling To Get Out," Said The Shopkeeper. "that's What I've Always Thought. No One Goes Mad Quicker Than A Totally Sane Person.
Struggle
Mad
Sanity
"and What Would Humans Be Without Love?" Rare, Said Death.
Love
Life
Romantic
They Suffered From The Terrible Delusion That Something Could Be Done. They Seemed Prepared To Make The World The Way They Wanted It Or Die In The Attempt, And The Trouble With Dying In The Attempt Was That You Died In The Attempt.
Dying
Done
World
The Nice Thing About Your Police Procedural As Opposed To Your Classic Murder Mystery Is That In A Murder Mystery You Don't Know Who Did It. Whereas In A Police Procedural You Know, You Know Everything Often And You're Watching The Police Home In.
Nice
Home
Murder Mysteries
If Per Capita Was A Problem, Decapita Could Be Arranged.
Problem
Dark Humor
Ifs
I Dinna Trust Him," Said Slightly Mad Angus. "he Reads Books An' Such.
Book
Mad
Said
Young Man, The Games We Play Are Lessons We Learn. The Assumptions We Make, Things We Ignore, And Things We Change Make Us What We Become.
Men
Games
Play
There Is Always Time For Another Last Minute
Lasts
Minutes
Last Minute
Cake Is Not The Issue Here.
Cake
Issues
But I Think You Have A Right To Know What It Is You’re Not Being Told.
Thinking
Knows
Unseen University Had Never Admitted Women, Muttering Something About Problems With The Plumbing, But The Real Reason Was An Unspoken Dread That If Women Were Allowed To Mess Around With Magic They Would Probably Be Embarrassingly Good At It.
Real
Magic
Unseen
Raising The Flag And Singing The Anthem Are, While Somewhat Suspicious, Not In Themselves Acts Of Treason.
Singing
Flags
Anthem
Now He Knew: They Were Real. Who’d Make Up A Thing Like This? Okay, One Of Them Was A Cheese That Rolled Around Of Its Own Accord, But Nobody Was Perfect.
Real
Perfect
Cheese
Poets Have Tried To Describe Ankh-morpork. They Have Failed. Perhaps It's The Sheer Zestful Vitality Of The Place, Or Maybe It's Just That A City With A Million Inhabitants And No Sewers Is Rather Robust For Poets, Who Prefer Daffodils And No Wonder. So Let's Just Say That Ankh-morpork Is As Full Of Life As An Old Cheese On A Hot Day, As Loud As A Curse In A Cathedral, As Bright As An Oil Slick, As Colourful As A Bruise And As Full Of Activity, Industry, Bustle And Sheer Exuberant Busyness As A Dead Dog On A Termite Mound.
Dog
Cities
Oil
If You Have To Look Along The Shaft Of An Arrow From The Wrong End, If A Man Has You Entirely At His Mercy, Then Hope Like Hell That Man Is An Evil Man. Because The Evil Like Power... They Will Talk, They Will Gloat. So Hope Like Hell Your Captor Is An Evil Man. A Good Man Will Kill You With Hardly A Word.
Men
Arrows
Evil
Of Course, It Is Very Important To Be Sober When You Take An Exam. Many Worthwhile Careers In The Street-cleansing, Fruit-picking And Subway-guitar-playing Industries Have Been Founded On A Lack Of Understanding Of This Simple Fact.
Simple
Guitar
Careers
He'd Noticed That Sex Bore Some Resemblance To Cookery: It Fascinated People, They Sometimes Bought Books Full Of Complicated Recipes And Interesting Pictures, And Sometimes When They Were Really Hungry They Created Vast Banquets In Their Imagination - But At The End Of The Day They'd Settle Quite Happily For Egg And Chips. If It Was Well Done And Maybe Had A Slice Of Tomato.
Sex
Food
Book
She Heard Him Mutter, 'can You Take Away This Grief?' 'i'm Sorry,' She Replied. 'everyone Asks Me. And I Would Not Do So Even If I Knew How. It Belongs To You. Only Time And Tears Take Away Grief; That Is What They Are For.
Sorry
Grief
Bereavement
Fear Is A Strange Soil. It Grows Obedience Like Corn, Which Grow In Straight Lines To Make Weeding Easier. But Sometimes It Grows The Potatoes Of Defiance, Which Flourish Underground.
Weed
Fear
Lines
If You Try To To Take My Bananas From Me, I Will Reclaim Them From Your Cold Dead Hands.
Hands
Trying
Bananas
Truly, He Thought, The Way Of Enlightenment Is Like Unto Half A Mile Of Broken Glass.
Glasses
Broken
Enlightenment
They Didn't Know Why These Things Were Funny. Sometimes You Laugh Because You've Got No More Room For Crying. Sometimes You Laugh Because Table Manners On A Beach Are Funny. And Sometimes You Laugh Because You're Alive, When You Really Shouldn't Be.
Beach
Laughing
Alive
You Can Think And You Can Fight, But The World's Always Movin', And If You Wanna Stay Ahead You Gotta Dance.
Fighting
Thinking
Rodents
Asking Someone To Repeat A Phrase You'd Not Only Heard Very Clearly But Were Also Exceedingly Angry About Was Around Defcon Ii In The Lexicon Of Squabble.
Phrases
Asking
Lexicon
Oh, Come On. Revelation Was A Mushroom Dream That Belonged In The Apocrypha. The New Testament Is Basically About What Happened When God Got Religion.
Dream
Mushrooms
Revelations
No Clowns Were Funny. That Was The Whole Purpose Of A Clown. People Laughed At Clowns, But Only Out Of Nervousness. The Point Of Clowns Was That, After Watching Them, Anything Else That Happened Seemed Enjoyable
People
Purpose
Clown
It's A Guilty Secret Of A Lot Of Writers, As You Get Older You Don't Read As Much Fiction As You Used To, Mainly Because It's Like You Are Deconstructing It All The Time.
Secret
Fiction
Guilty
The Real World Was Far Too Real To Leave Neat Little Hints. It Was Full Of Too Many Things. It Wasn't By Eliminating The Impossible That You Got To The Truth, However Improbable; It Was By The Much Harder Process Of Eliminating The Possibilities.
Real
Hints
World
And What Are You Doing On It, I Would Like To Know? Running Away From Home, Yesno? If You Were A Boy I'd Say Are You Going To Seek Your Fortune?" "can't Girls Seek Their Fortune?" "i Think They're Supposed To Seek A Boy With A Fortune.
Girl
Running
Home
Stop Stealing The Funeral Meats Right Now, You Wee Scuggers!" She Shouted. The Feegles Stopped And Stared At Her. Then Rob Anybody Said: "socks Wi'oot Feets?
Funeral
Meat
Stealing
Most Of My Schooldays Were The Worst Day Of My Life.
Worst
Worst Day
Who Knows What The Future Holds.
Knows
Cheery Was Aware That Commander Vimes Didn't Like The Phrase 'the Innocent Have Nothing To Fear', Believing The Innocent Had Everything To Fear, Mostly From The Guilty But In The Longer Term Even More From Those Who Say Things Like 'the Innocent Have Nothing To Fear'.
Believe
Phrases
Snuff
You Call Yourself Some Kind Of Goddess And You Know Nothing, Madam, Nothing. What Don't Die Can't Live. What Don't Live Can't Change. What Don't Change Can't Learn. The Smallest Creature That Dies In The Grass Knows More Than You.
Kind
Goddess
Grass
Tourist, Rincewind Decided, Meant ‘idiot.
Tourists
Idiot
Decided
They Always Gives Me Bath Salts," Complained Nobby. "and Bath Soap And Bubble Bath And Herbal Bath Lumps And Tons Of Bath Stuff And I Can't Think Why, 'cos It's Not As If I Hardly Ever Has A Bath. You'd Think They'd Take The Hint, Wouldn't You?
Thinking
Giving
Hints
There Can Be No Better Grounding For A Lifetime As An Author Than To See Humanity In All Its Various Guises Through The Lens Of The Reporter For The Town.
Humanity
Towns
Lenses
People Were Stupid, Sometimes. They Thought The Library Was A Dangerous Place Because Of All The Magical Books, Which Was True Enough, But What Made It Really One Of The Most Dangerous Places There Could Ever Be Was The Simple Fact That It Was A Library.
Stupid
Book
Simple
Although The Scythe Isn't Pre-eminent Among The Weapons Of War, Anyone Who Has Been On The Wrong End Of, Say, A Peasants' Revolt Will Know That In Skilled Hands It Is Fearsome.
War
Hands
Weapons
God Moves In Extremely Mysterious, Not To Say, Circuitous Ways. God Does Not Play Dice With The Universe; He Plays An Ineffable Game Of His Own Devising, Which Might Be Compared, From The Perspective Of Any Of The Other Players, Ie., Everybody, To Being Involved In An Obscure And Complex Version Of Poker In A Pitch-dark Room, With Blank Cards, For Infinite Stakes, With A Dealer Who Won't Tell You The Rules, And Who Smiles All The Time.
Moving
Dark
Player
People Aren't Just People, They Are People Surrounded By Circumstances.
People
Circumstances
Banana Daiquiris Aren't Knock-'em-back-by-the-flagon.
Bananas
Ems
Daiquiris
Don't Do Anything I Wouldn't Do, If You Ever Find Anything I Wouldn't Do.
Ifs
But In His Experience It Was Only A Matter Of Time Before The Normal Balance Of The Universe Restored Itself And Started Doing The Usual Terrible Things To Him.
Balance
Matter
Normal
Ritual And Ceremony In Their Due Times Kept The World Under The Sky And The Stars In Their Courses. It Was Astonishing What Ritual And Ceremony Could Do.
Stars
Sky
World
I Staggered Into A Manchester Bar Late One Night On A Tour And The Waitress Said "you Look As If You Need A Screaming Orgasm". At The Time This Was The Last Thing On My Mind.
Night
Mind
Needs
A Good Bookshop Is Just A Genteel Black Hole That Knows How To Read.
Black
Discworld
Holes
Matter Exploded Into Being, Apparently As Chaos, But In Fact As A Chord. The Ultimate Power Chord.
Matter
Facts
Chaos
You Couldn't Say 'i Had Orders.' You Couldn't Say 'it's Not Fair.' No One Was Listening. There Were No Words. You Owned Yourself. [...] Not 'thou Shalt Not'. Say 'i Will Not'.
Atheist
Order
Listening
When People Say "clearly" Something That Means There's A Huge Crack In Their Argument And They Know Things Aren't Clear At All.
Mean
People
Cracks
I Read The Best Works Of Some Of The Best Satirists, And Indeed Best Writers From The Beginning Of The Victorian Era To About The 1960s. If You Want To Be A Blacksmith, You Go And Watch The Blacksmith Working, And You Work Out What The Blacksmith Does.
Work Out
Doe
Watches
Life Doesn't Happen In Chapters - At Least, Not Regular Ones.
Chapters
Happens
The Secret Is Not To Dream," She Whispered. "the Secret Is To Wake Up. Waking Up Is Harder. I Have Woken Up And I Am Real. I Know Where I Come From And I Know Where I'm Going. You Cannot Fool Me Any More. Or Touch Me. Or Anything That Is Mine.
Dream
Real
Secret
It's Hard To Explain," Said Brutha. "but I Think It's Got Something To Do With How People Should Behave... You Should Do Things Because They're Right. Not Because Gods Say So. They Might Say Something Different Another Time.
Thinking
People
Different
The Iq Of A Mob Is The Iq Of Its Dumbest Member Divided By The Number Of Mobsters.
Numbers
Mobster
Members
Mr. Tulip Lived His Life On That Thin Line Most People Occupy Just Before They Haul Off And Hit Someone Repeatedly With A Wrench.
People
Lines
Wrenches
When I Was A Kid, I Read The Science-fiction Shelves, And I Read The Fantasy Shelves.
Kids
Fiction
Fantasy
Watching A Dog Try To Chew A Large Piece Of Toffee Is A Pastime Fit For Gods. Mr. Fusspot's Mixed Ancestry Had Given Him A Dexterity Of Jaw That Was Truly Awesome. He Somersaulted Happily Around The Floor, Making Faces Like A Rubber Gargoyle In A Washing Machine.
Dog
Trying
Faces
Chain-mail Isn't Much Defence Against An Arrow. It Certainly Isn't When The Arrow Is Being Aimed Between Your Eyes.
Eye
Arrows
Mail
After A While, Another Voice Said: One, Two, Three, Four- And The Universe Came Into Being. It Was Wrong To Call It A Big Bang. That Would Just Be Noise, And All That Noise Could Create Is More Noise And A Cosmos Full Of Random Particles. Matter Exploded Into Being, Apparently As Chaos, But In Fact As A Chord. The Ultimate Power Chord.
Music
Two
Voice
He'd Heard That Writers Spent All Day In Their Dressing Gowns Drinking Champagne. This Is, Of Course, Absolutely True.
Drinking
Gowns
Champagne
Understanding Quotes: Their Essence and Application

Quotes, or quotations, are powerful tools in communication, encapsulating ideas, emotions, and wisdom in concise expressions. They serve various purposes across different contexts, from academic writing to everyday conversation.

1. Defining Quotes

A quote is a repetition of someone else's statement or thoughts. It can be a direct replication of words spoken or written by another individual, often used to support arguments, provide evidence, or convey profound insights.


2. The Importance of Quotes

2.1. Enhancing Credibility

Incorporating quotes from authoritative sources can bolster the credibility of your work. By referencing experts or primary sources, you demonstrate thorough research and a solid foundation for your arguments.


2.2. Providing Evidence

Quotes serve as concrete evidence to support claims. In academic and professional writing, they validate points made, offering readers a basis to trust the information presented.


2.3. Conveying Emotions and Perspectives

Quotes can encapsulate emotions and perspectives succinctly. They allow writers to express complex feelings or viewpoints through the words of others, often more eloquently than paraphrasing.


3. Types of Quotes

3.1. Direct Quotes

Direct quotes involve copying the exact words from a source, enclosed in quotation marks. They are used when the original wording is significant or particularly well-expressed.


3.2. Indirect Quotes (Paraphrasing)

Indirect quotes restate the original message in your own words. While not enclosed in quotation marks, they still require proper attribution to the original source.


3.3. Block Quotes

Block quotes are lengthy direct quotations, formatted as a separate block of text. They are typically used for quotes exceeding a certain length, varying by citation style. For instance, in APA style, quotes longer than 40 words are formatted as block quotes.



4. Proper Usage of Quotes


4.1. Contextual Relevance

Ensure that the quote you choose is relevant to the topic and adds value to your content. Avoid inserting quotes solely for decorative purposes.


4.2. Integration into Your Writing

Seamlessly integrate quotes into your writing. Introduce them appropriately and follow up with analysis or commentary to connect them to your main points.


4.3. Attribution and Citation

Always attribute quotes to their original authors and provide proper citations according to the required style guide (APA, MLA, Chicago, etc.).


5. Common Mistakes to Avoid


5.1. Overusing Quotes

Relying too heavily on quotes can overshadow your voice. Use them sparingly to support your arguments, not replace them.


5.2. Lack of Analysis

Presenting a quote without analysis or explanation can leave readers questioning its relevance. Always follow up with your interpretation or discussion.


5.3. Misquoting or Taking Out of Context

Ensure that quotes are accurate and not taken out of context, as this can mislead readers and undermine your credibility.



6. Quotes in Different Contexts


6.1. Academic Writing

In academic writing, quotes are used to support arguments, provide evidence, and engage with existing literature. Proper citation is crucial to avoid plagiarism.


6.2. Journalism

Journalists use quotes to provide firsthand accounts, add authenticity, and present multiple perspectives within a story.


6.3. Literature and Creative Writing

In literature, quotes can be used to convey character voices, themes, and stylistic elements. They enrich narratives and provide depth to storytelling.



7. Punctuation and Formatting


Understanding the correct punctuation and formatting of quotes is essential:


Quotation Marks: Always enclose direct quotes within quotation marks.


Punctuation Placement: In American English, periods and commas are placed inside quotation marks, while colons and semicolons are placed outside.


Block Quotes: For longer quotes, format them as block quotes without quotation marks, and indent the entire block.



8. Ethical Considerations


Ethical use of quotes involves accurate representation, proper attribution, and respect for intellectual property. Misuse can lead to plagiarism, which carries serious academic and professional consequences.

9. Tools for Managing Quotes


Utilize tools like citation generators and plagiarism checkers to manage quotes effectively. These tools help ensure proper formatting and originality in your writing.



Conclusion


Quotes are invaluable in enriching content, providing evidence, and conveying complex ideas succinctly. When used appropriately, they enhance the quality and credibility of your writing. Always ensure relevance, proper integration, and ethical usage to maximize their impact.


Trending Author
Kent Conrad
Miranda July
Jackie Kennedy
Alan Furst
Archibald MacLeish
Frederick Sanger
Category
Information