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Anyplace Market Forces Have Been Artificially Removed By The Government There Is A Total Absence Of Incentives, Competition, Effective Oversight, Cost Controls And So On.

-Ann Coulter

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Anyplace Market Forces Have

Ann Coulter

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Anyplace Market Forces Have Been Artificially Removed By The Government There Is A Total Absence Of Incentives, Competition, Effective Oversight, Cost Controls And So On.

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When A Feminist As Strident As Garofalo Is Defending The Hussein Regime, You Have To Wonder If Her Newfound Sobriety Has Hit A Rough Patch.

We Need Somebody To Put Rat Poisoning In Justice Stevens' Creme Brulee. That's Just A Joke, For You In The Media.

But All Liberals Only Have Empathy For The Exact Same Victims - Always The Ones That Are Represented By Powerful Liberal Interest Groups.

At Every Other Workplace In The Nation - Even Mal-mart! - Workers Are Being Laid Off. But No One At Any Of The Bloated Government Bureaucracies Ever Need Fear Receiving A Pink Slip. All 64,750 Employees At The Department Of Health And Human Services Are Apparently Absolutely Crucial To The Smooth Functioning Of The Department.

You Want To Be Careful Not To Become Just A Blowhard.

On One Hand, Liberals Are Enraged At The Heinousness Of Mark Sanford - Whom They Didn't Vote For - For Not Resigning And, On The Other, They're Enraged At Palin - Whom They Also Didn't Vote For - For Resigning.

Clinton's Attempt To Socialize Healthcare Was The Second Most Disgusting Thing He Did In The Oval Office. I Can't Remember Was The First Thing Was.

Liberals Could Not Be Less Interested In Democracy When It Came To Taking Out Saddam Hussein... Now A Loyal American Ally [mubarak] Comes Under Attack And They Are Burning For Democracy.

Moderation In The Defense Of Liberty Is No Virtue.

Liberals Tell Amazing Lies About Guns And Everything Else.

Why Couldn't Obama Have Picked Somebody Respectable As His Running Mate, You Know, Like John Kerry Did?

Liberals Have Managed To Eliminate The Idea Of Manly Honor. Instead, All They Have Is Womanly Indignation.

Faggot Isn't Offensive To Gays; It's Got Nothing To Do With Gays.

Obama Said, 'now Let Me Be Clear, Issues Of Women's Equality Are By No Means Simply An Issue For Islam.' No, He Said, 'the Struggle For Women's Equality Continues In Many Aspects Of American Life.' So On One Hand, 12-year-old Girls Are Stoned To Death For The Crime Of Being Raped In Muslim Countries. But On The Other Hand, We Still Don't Have Enough Female Firefighters Here In America.

Clinton Masturbates In The Sinks.

My Track Record Is Pretty Good On Predictions.

We Just Want Jews To Be Perfected, As They Say.

Anyplace Market Forces Have Been Artificially Removed By The Government There Is A Total Absence Of Incentives, Competition, Effective Oversight, Cost Controls And So On.

Frankly, I'm Getting A Lot Of Great Publicity.

Liberals Are More Upset When A Tree Is Chopped Down Than When A Child Is Aborted. Even If One Rates An Unborn Child Less Than A Full-blown Person, Doesn't The Unborn Child Rate Slightly Higher Than Vegetation?

I Think There Should Be A Literacy Test And A Poll Tax For People To Vote.

This Is What Christians Consider Themselves: Perfected Jews.

As Far As I'm Concerned, I'm A Middle-of-the-road Moderate And The Rest Of You Are Crazy.

Democrats All Claim They'll Get Rough With The Terrorists, But They Can't Even Face Brit Hume.

I'm Getting A Little Fed Up With Hearing About, Oh, Civilian Casualties. I Think We Ought To Nuke North Korea Right Now Just To Give The Rest Of The World A Warning.

Liberals Compare Jerry Falwell To The Taliban, But Then Are Furious With George Bush For Not Being Jesus Christ. Evidently, What A President Is Supposed To Do When The Girls Are Scared Is Develop Complete Omniscience And Omnipotence. Thus, The Media Repeatedly Expound Upon The Proposition That What Bush Should Have Done In Response To The Anthrax Mailings Is: Instantly Produce The Culprits And Put An End To This Madness!

A Married Woman, The Safest Place For Any Woman To Be Is At Home With Her Husband.

I Would Like Evolution To Join The Roster Of Other Discredited Religions...

Republicans Have Reached Out So Much To Black Republicans Because It's Part Of Our Tradition. Blacks Have Been In This Nation Longer Than Most Other Americans With The Possible Exception Of White Anglo-saxon Protestant. The First Blacks In Congress And The First Black Governor Were All Republicans. It Was Republicans Who Fought The Civil War Over Slavery And Who Introduced The Civil Rights Legislation Over The Next Hundred Years.

Fittingly, In The Final Analysis, Clinton Will Not Be Remembered For What He Did As President, But For Who He Did.

Canada Has Become Trouble Recently ... It's Always The Worst Americans Who Go There ... We Could Have Taken Them Over So Easy. But I Only Want The Western Part, With The Ski Areas, The Cowboys, And The Right Wingers. They're The Only Good Parts Of Canada.

That Is [liberalism's] Goal - To Destroy The Family... [liberals] Just Made Up This Gay Marriage Thing Gays Are Natural Conservatives.

Who's Gonna Give Me A Tv Show? I Didn't Work For An Impeached, Disbarred President Who Was Held In Contempt By A Federal Judge. That's What They Look For In Objective Reporters.

The Truth Cannot Be Delivered With Novocaine.

No Science Is Ever Frightening To Christians. Religious People Don't Need The Science To Come Out Any Particular Way On Iq Or Aids Or Sex Differences Any More Than They Need The Science To Come Out Any Particular Way On Evolution...if Evolution Is True, Then God Created Evolution.

Democrats Are Channeling Their Frustration With America's Imminent Military Victory In Afghanistan Into Hysterical Opposition To Reasonable National Security Measures At Home. (incidentally, This Ought To Prove Once And For All What A Bunch Of Paper Tigers The Russians Are. What Were They Doing Over There For 10 Years? It Hasn't Taken Us 10 Weeks.)

Unfortunately, Proof Of A Jefferson-hemings Liaison Was As Fanciful As Professor Ellis' War Service.

Before The New York Times Starts Running "portraits In Grief" Of Former Enron Employees, It's Worth Remembering That Even After The Collapse, Enron Stock Is Still Worth More Than The Entire Social Security "trust Fund."

When Contemplating College Liberals, You Really Regret Once Again That John Walker Is Not Getting The Death Penalty.we Need To Execute People Like John Walker In Order To Physically Intimidate Liberals, By Making Them Realize That They Can Be Killed Too. Otherwise They Will Turn Out To Be Outright Traitors.

In A Comprehensive Study Of All Public Multiple Shooting Incidents In America Between 1977 And 1999, Economists John Lott And Bill Landes Found That The Only Public Policy That Reduced Both The Incidence And Casualties Of Such Shootings Were Concealed-carry Laws. Not Only Are There 60 Percent Fewer Gun Massacres After States Adopt Concealed-carry Laws, But The Death And Injury Rate Of Such Rampages Are Reduced By 80 Percent.

I'd Pretty Much Debate Anybody. I Prefer To Debate Smart Liberals. I'm Not Saying This About Stephen Colbert But, Unfortunately, The Most Famous Liberals Generally Aren't The Smartest Ones. I Have A List Of The Smarter Liberals I Recommend.

When Contemplating A Shield That Would Protect America For Incoming Missiles, Democrats Suddenly Became Hardheaded Fiscal Conservatives. For The First Time In Recorded History, Liberals Were Concerned About The Cost And Usefulness Of A Government Program. These People Believe Federally Funded Art Therapy For The Homeless Will Pay For Itself. That You Can Take To The Bank. But A Shield To Repel Incoming Nuclear Missiles From American Soil They Said, Was Too Expensive And Wouldn't Work.

As The Leader Of Twelve Apostles, Even Jesus Had More Executive Experience Than Obama.

Democrats Are Not Angry About 9/11. Sad, Maybe - Sad That It Didn't Happen On Clinton's Watch So His Legacy Would Be More Than A Semen Stain. But They're Not Angry.

When Minutemen Leader Jim Gilchrist And His Black Colleague Marvin Stewart Were Invited By The College Republicans To Speak At Columbia Last Year, The Tolerant, Free-speech-loving Columbia Students Violently Attacked Them, Shutting Down The Speech.

In The History Of The Nation, There Has Never Been A Political Party So Ridiculous As Today's Democrats. It's As If All The Brain-damaged People In America Got Together And Formed A Voting Bloc.

As President, Nixon Imposed Wage And Price Controls, Created The Environmental Protection Agency, Initiated Race-based Hiring Schemes, Signed Salt I With The Soviets And Instituted Rapprochement With The Red Chinese. All Of This Resulted In Liberals ... Despising Him Even More!

The Most Crazed Religious Fanatic Argues In More Calm And Reasoned Tones Than Liberals Responding To Statistics On Concealed-carry Permits.

What I And Other Commentators Do Is Attempt To Move The Public Opinion. We Try To Change Minds.

Yes, Of Course, Black Americans Are A Special Group, And I'm Disappointed That They're Not Republicans, Given Our Traditions. We're Not Getting Much Love In Return, Despite Our Efforts.

A 1990 Study By The (liberal) Progressive Policy Institute Showed That, After Controlling For Single Motherhood, The Difference In Black And White Crime Rates Disappeared.

Black And White

So Now It Turns Out That Thomas Jefferson Was Having Sex With Sally Hemings While Serving In The 101st Airborne During The Vietnam War.

I'm Not Going To Be Lectured To.

Stem-cell Research On Embryos Is An Even Worse Excuse For The Slaughter Of Life Than Abortion. No Woman Is Even Being Spared An Inconvenience This Time.... It's Just Harvest And Slaughter, Harvest And Slaughter, Harvest And Slaughter.

Obamacare Would Never Have Passed Without Decades Of Massive Immigration From The Third World. Liberals Didn't Change Any Minds - They Changed The Voters.

I'm A Problem-solver, And You're Welcome.

Problem Solvers

If John Kerry Had A Dollar For Every Time He Bragged About Serving In Vietnam - Oh Wait, He Does.

Usually The Nonsense Liberals Spout Is Kind Of Cute, But In Wartime Their Instinctive Idiocy Is Life-threatening.

If You Can Somehow Force A Liberal Into A Point-counterpoint Argument, His Retorts Will Bear No Relation To What You’ve Said - Unless You Were In Fact Talking About Your Looks, Your Age, Your Weight, Your Personal Obsessions, Or Whether You Are A Fascist. In The Famous Liberal Two-step, They Leap From One Idiotic Point To The Next, So You Can Never Nail Them. It’s Like Arguing With Someone With Attention Deficit Disorder.

Reagan Took An Approach To The Cold War Dramatically Different From Any Other Us President. To Wit, He Thought We Should Win. This Was A Fresh Concept. At The Time, It Was Widely Ridiculed As A Dangerous Alteration Of Us Policy. Only After It Worked Was Reagan's Dangerous Foreign Policy Recast As Merely A Continuation Of The Policies Of His Predecessors.

Liberals Are More Upset When A Tree Is Chopped Down Than When A Child Is Aborted.

It Is Puzzling Why Anyone Would Want To (become Governor Of California). It's Like Vying To Become Roseanne Barr's Next Husband. Sure You'd Get Your Name In The Paper, But Look At The Mess You'd Be Getting Yourself Into.

In The Druidical Religion Of Liberalism, Not Separating Your Recyclables Is A Sin, But Abortion Is Just A Medical Procedure.

The Only Important Lesson From The Vietnam War Is This: Democrats Lose Wars.

A Cruise Missile Is More Important Than Head Start.

I Think [women] Should Be Armed But Should Not Vote ... Women Have No Capacity To Understand How Money Is Earned. They Have A Lot Of Ideas On How To Spend It ... It's Always More Money On Education, More Money On Child Care, More Money On Day Care.

No Wonder You Guys Lost.

I Cut Through The Nonsense With The Blinding Light Of Truth.

It Is A Law Of Nature That Everything Run By The Government Will Get More Expensive And Worse Over Time. Everything Run By The Private Sector Will Get Better And Cheaper Over Time. The Fact That [obamacare] Starts This Badly Does Not Bode Well....we Want Healthcare Run On The Same System That Gave Us Cell Phones, Flat Screens, Jerry Garcia Chia Pets. Everything You Submit To The Free Market...keeps Getting Better And Better.

Walking Back From The Convention Site I Chatted With A Normal Bostonian For Several Blocks -- Who Must Have Identified Me Through Our Covert System Of Signals. He Was Mostly Bemused By The Democrats' Primetime Speakers And Told Me He Used To Be An Independent, But For The Last 20 Years Found Himself Voting Mostly Republican. Then He Corrected Himself And Said He Votes For The American.

Canada Used To Be...one Of Our Most...most Loyal Friends, And Vice Versa. I Mean, Canada Sent Troops To Vietnam. Was Vietnam Less Containable And More Of A Threat Than Saddam Hussein?

I Have To Say I'm All For Public Flogging. One Type Of Criminal That A Public Humiliation Might Work Particularly Well With Are The Juvenile Delinquents, A Lot Of Whom Consider It A Badge Of Honor To Be Sent To Juvenile Detention. And It Might Not Be Such A Cool Thing In The 'hood To Be Flogged Publicly.

Even Obama's Staunchest Supporters Are Starting To Leave Him. Last Week Michelle Obama Demanded To See A Copy Of His Birth Certificate.

We Didn't Raise This Issue, The Courts Raised It. The Courts Jammed It Down Our Throats, At The Risk Of Insulting Any Of My Gay Male Fans.

From The People Who Brought You "zero Tolerance," I Present The Gun-free Zone! Yippee! Problem Solved! Bam! Bam! Everybody Down! Hey, How Did That Deranged Loner Get A Gun Into This Gun-free Zone?

You Can Describe Christianity And You Can Also Describe Liberalism. Christianity Has Certain Beliefs, Tenets, Doctrines. Not All Christians Are Always Living Up To Them. Similarly, Not All Liberals Are Living Up To The Tenets Of Liberalism.

To Be Sure, Conservative Radio Talk Show Hosts Have A Built-in Audience Unavailable To Liberals: People Driving Cars To Some Sort Of Job.

Six Imams Removed From A Us Airways Flight From Minneapolis To Phoenix Are Calling On Muslims To Boycott The Airline. If Only We Could Get Muslims To Boycott All Airlines, We Could Dispense With Airport Security Altogether.

The Thing I Like About Bush Is I Think He Hates Liberals.

Any Growing Interest In Soccer Can Only Be A Sign Of The Nation's Moral Decay.

My Hobby (politics) Has Become My Life. I Have The Greatest Life Imaginable. I Think I Have A Greater Life Than Anyone In The Universe, In Fact.

For Decades Now, The Democrats Have Had A Good Gig Buying The Votes Of Government Workers With Outrageous Salaries, Benefits And Work Rules - And Then Sticking Productive Earners With The Bill. But, Now, We're Out Of Money.

Liberals Can't Just Come Out And Say, They Want To Take More Of Our Money, Kill Babies, And Discriminate On The Basis Of Race.

I Defy Any Of My Coreligionists To Tell Me They Do Not Laugh At The Idea Of Dawkins Burning In Hell.

As The Saying Goes: God Made Man And Woman; Colonel Colt Made Them Equal.

Liberals Hate America, They Hate "flag-wavers", They Hate Abortion Opponents, They Hate All Religions Except Islam (post 9/11). Even Islamic Terrorists Don't Hate America Like Liberals Do. They Don't Have The Energy. If They Had That Much Energy, They'd Have Indoor Plumbing By Now.

These Days, Even A Moderate Democrat Is Someone Who Thinks You Shouldn't Be Taught Fisting Until You're At Least 12 Years Old.

Whenever A Liberal Begins A Statement With 'i Don't Know Which Is More Frightening,' You Know The Answer Is Going To Be Pretty Clear.

When Every One Of Your Arguments Is Characterized An Attempt To Bring Back Slavery Or Resegregate Lunch Counters, It's A Little Hard To Have Any Sort Of Productive Debate.

A Word To Those Of You Out There Who Have Yet To Be Offended By Something I Have Said: Please Be Patient. I Am Working As Fast As I Can.

According To The California Hospital Association, Health Care For Illegal Aliens Is Costing State Taxpayers Well Over $1 Billion A Year. Eighty-four Hospitals Across California Have Already Been Forced To Close Because Of Unpaid Bills By Illegal Aliens.

My Only Regret With Timothy Mcveigh Is He Did Not Go To The New York Times Building.

The Idea Of A Bowed And Terrified Liberal Minority During Mccarthy's 'reign Of Terror' Is Poppycock. Then As Now, All Elite Opinion Was Against Mccarthy.

Gore Said Foreigners Are Not Worried About 'what The Terrorist Networks Are Going To Do, But About What We're Going To Do.' Good. They Should Be Worried. They Hate Us? We Hate Them. Americans Don't Want To Make Islamic Fanatics Love Us. We Want To Make Them Die. There's Nothing Like Horrendous Physical Pain To Quell Anger. Japanese Kamikazes Pilots Hated Us Once, Too. A Couple Of Well-aimed Nuclear Weapons Got Their Attention. Now They Are Gentle Little Lambs.

In Another Show Of America's Force To The World, When The Soviets Invaded Afghanistan, Carter Responded By Boycotting The Olympics. And Thus Was A Fearsome Blow Struck At Little Fourteen-year-old American Girls Who Had Spent Their Lives Training For The Olympics.

Liberals Could Live Their Whole Lives Never Having To Hear An Actual Conservative Opinion Other Than The Idiotic Arguments Written For Conservative Characters On Aaron Sorkin's Little Teleplays.

Liberals Don't Love Big Government Because They Think It's Efficient, Compassionate, Fair Or Even Remotely Useful. They Support Big Government Because They Are Guaranteed The Support Of Nearly Everyone Who Works For The Government.

With The Terrible Earthquake And Resulting Tsunami That Have Devastated Japan, The Only Good News Is That Anyone Exposed To Excess Radiation From The Nuclear Power Plants Is Now Probably Much Less Likely To Get Cancer.

I Am The Illegal Alien Of Commentary. I Will Do The Jokes That No One Else Will Do.

The Only Sexism Involved In The Miers Nomination Is The Administration's Claim That Once They Decided They Wanted A Woman, Miers Was The Best They Could Do. Let Me Just Say, If The Top Male Lawyer In The Country Is John Roberts And The Top Female Lawyer Is Harriet Miers, We May As Well Stop Allowing Girls To Go To Law School.

Instead Of 'counterrevolutionaries,' Liberals' Opponents Are Called 'haters,' 'those Who Seek To Divide Us,' 'tea Baggers,' And 'right-wing Hate Groups.' Meanwhile, Conservatives Call Liberals 'liberals'-and That Makes Them Testy.

We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity. We Weren't Punctilious About Locating And Punishing Only Hitler And His Top Officers. We Carpet-bombed German Cities; We Killed Civilians. That's War. And This Is War.

Almost Everything Wrong With Our Health Care System Comes From Government Interference With The Free Market. If The Health Care System Is Broken, Then Fix It. Don't Try To Invent A New One Premised On All The Bad Ideas That Are Causing Problems In The First Place.

To Expiate The Pain Of Losing Her Firstborn Son In The Iraq War, Cindy Sheehan Decided To Cheer Herself Up By Engaging In Stalinist Agitprop Outside President Bush's Crawford Ranch, ... It's The Strangest Method Of Grieving I've Seen Since Paul Wellstone's Funeral. Someone Needs To Teach These Liberals How To Mourn.

Liberals Don't Care. Their Approach Is To Rip Out Society's Foundations Without Asking If They Serve Any Purpose. Why Do We Have Immigration Laws? What's With These Borders? Why Do We Have The Institution Of Marriage, Anyway? What Do We Need Standardized Tests For? Hey, I Like Keith Richards - Why Not Make Heroin Legal? Let's Take A Sledgehammer To All These Load-bearing Walls And Just See What Happens!

Because Of The Industrialization Of Agriculture -- Using Massive Amounts Of Fossil Fuel -- Only 2 Percent Of Americans Work In Farming. And Yet They Produce Enough Food To Feed All 300 Million Americans, With Plenty Left Over For Export. When Are Liberals Going To Break The News To Their Friends In Darfur That They All Have To Starve To Death To Save The Planet?

Industrialization

But Ultimately, The Purpose Of Marriage Is To Transmit Civilization To The Next Generation. There Has Never Been An Institution That Does It As Well As Marriage, And That Is Marriage Between A Man And A Woman.

Judging By Their Positions At The Time, Rather Than Their Post Hoc Allegations, Democrats Adored The Soviet Union. Congressional Democrats Repeatedly Opposed Funding Anti-communist Rebels, They Opposed Reagan's Military Build-up, They Opposed Building A Shield To Protect America From Incoming Missiles, They Opposed Putting Missiles In Europe. As A Rule, Democrats Opposed Anything Opposed By Their Cherished Soviet Union.

Just As We're Always Told That Schoolyard Bullies Are Actually Deeply Insecure, Liberals Rationalize Their Own Ferocious Behavior By Claiming To Have Been Wounded Somehow. What About The Little Guy Our Poor, Insecure Bully Is Beating The Living Daylights Out Of? How's His Self-esteem Coming Along? That Is The Essence Of Liberals: They Viciously Attack Everyone Else, While Wailing That They Are The Victims.

At Least When Right-wingers Rant There's A Point.

If You Want To Find The Cool, Anti-establishment Rebels Who Don't Answer To The Man On College Campuses Today, You Have To Go To A Meeting Of The College Republicans. They Are Rebelling Against At Least 99 Percent Of Their Professors.

The Democratic Party Supports Criminals And Islamic Terrorists But Has No Sympathy For Taxpayers.

Liberals Believe In Burning The American Flag, Urinating On Crucifixes, And Passing Out Birth Control Pills To 11-year-olds Without Telling Their Parents -- But God Forbid An Infidel Touch A Quran At Guantanamo.

Strom Thurmond The Only Segregationist Anyone Can Name. Meanwhile, The Democratic Party Had Former Klansmen, Members Of A Terrorist Group That Was Lynching And Murdering Black People. That Was An Outgrowth Of The Democratic Party.

No Matter What Argument You Make Against Evolution, The Response Is Well, You Know, It's Possible To Believe In Evolution And Believe In God. Yes, And It's Possible To Believe In Spiderman And Believe In God, But That Doesn't Prove Spiderman Is True.

If It Were True That Conservatives Were Racist, Sexist, Homophobic, Fascist, Stupid, Inflexible, Angry, And Self-righteous, Shouldn't Their Arguments Be Easy To Deconstruct? Someone Who Is Making A Point Out Of Anger, Ideology, Inflexibility, Or Resentment Would Presumably Construct A Flimsy Argument. So Why Can't The Argument Itself Be Dismembered Rather Than The Speaker's Personal Style Or Hidden Motives? Why The Evasions?

Liberals Claim To Love Gays When It Allows Them To Vent Their Spleen At Republicans. But Disagree With Liberals And Their First Response Is To Call You Gay. Liberals Are Gays' Biggest Champions On Issues Most Gays Couldn't Care Less About, Like Gay Marriage Or Taxpayer Funding Of Photos Of Men With Bullwhips Up Their Derrieres. But Who Has Done More To Out, Embarrass, And Destroy The Lives Of Gay Men Who Prefer To Keep Their Orientation Private Than Democrats? Who Is More Intolerant Of Gays In The Republican Party Than Gays In The Democratic Party?

I Think Our Party And Particularly Our Movement, The Conservative Movement, Does Have More Of A Problem With Con Men And Charlatans Than The Democratic Party. I Mean, The Incentives Seem To Be Set Up To Allow People - As Long As You Have A Band Of A Few Million Fanatical Followers, You Can Make Money. The Democrats Have Managed To Figure Out How Not To Do That.

As Soon As The Subject Moves To Tv Shows And Movies, I'm A Total Failure. And I'd Been Paying For All Those Premium Channels For Years, But Recently Cancelled Them, Since I Never Watched Any Of Those Networks.

The Idea That Making An Activity Legal Would Reduce Its Incidence Is Preposterous. This Is Exactly Like The Clintonian Statement About Wanting To Make Abortion 'safe, Legal And Rare.' The Most Effective Way To Make Something 'rare' Is To Make It Illegal.

Bush Won The Largest Popular Vote In History With A 3.5 Million Margin. Indeed, Simply By Getting A Majority Of The Country To Vote For Him - The Left's Most Hated Politician Since Richard Nixon - Bush Did Something Rock Star Bill Clinton Never Did. Bush Maintained Or Increased His Vote In Every State But Vermont.

The Most Dangerous Action A Woman Can Take When Faced With A Criminal Is To Resist With Her Fists: That Tends To Annoy Violent Criminals, And The Woman Will Very Likely Be Seriously Injured. But A Woman Who Takes The Advice Of Handgun Control Inc. And Passively Submits Is 2.5 Times More Likely To Be Injured Than A Woman Who Resists With A Gun. So If You Don't Want To Lie Back And Enjoy It, Get A Gun. Otherwise You May Never Become A Mom.

There Is A Growing Body Of Evidence That Radiation In Excess Of What The Government Says Are The Minimum Amounts We Should Be Exposed To Are Actually Good For You And Reduce Cases Of Cancer.

You Will Find Liberals Always Rooting For Savages Against Civilization.

What I'm Critical Of Is - The White House Attacking Conservatives, For Saying We're Elitist For Pointing Out That Harriet Miers Isn't Qualified To Sit On The Supreme Court. I'm Starting To Feel Sort Of Bad About - About Saying That. And I'm Annoyed With George Bush [jr.] For Putting Us In The Position Of Having To Say That.

Four Years Of Jimmy Carter Gave Us Two Titanic Reagan Landslides, Peace And Prosperity For Eight Blessed Years - And Even A Third Term For His Feckless Vice President, George H.w. Bush.

Whenever A Liberal Begins A Peevish Complaint With A Throat-clearing Equivocation Like, "of Course, We All Agree," Your Antennae Should Go Up. This Is How Liberals Couch Statements They Assume All Americans Would Demand They Make, But Which They Secretly Chafe At.

Because Of All Our Presidents, Barack Obama Is The One Most Likely To Be Descended From A Slave Trader, Since Kenya Had A Major Slave-trading Port, And The Muslims Were Heavily Involved In The Slave Trade.

The Democrats Pretended To Care About Black People For About Five Minutes To Help Their Electoral Process, And Then Civil Rights Suddenly Became Abortion On Demand, Gay Marriage, Rights For The Homeless, Etc.

Our Blacks Are Better Than Their's

There's Been Another Mass Shooting By A Crazy Person, And Liberals Still Refuse To Consider Institutionalizing The Dangerously Mentally Ill.

This Is No Time To Be Precious About Locating The Exact Individuals Directly Involved In This Particular Terrorist Attack.... We Know Who The Homicidal Maniacs Are. They Are The Ones Cheering And Dancing Right Now. We Should Invade Their Countries, Kill Their Leaders And Convert Them To Christianity.

Obviously, I'm A Fan Of Satire. I'd Debate Anyone, But It Would Have To Be The Actual Person. That Would Be My Only Hesitation About Debating Stephen Colbert. If He Were Playing A Character, It Wouldn't Really Work.

I Don't Really Understand The Point About Carping About Every Casualty, Every Bombing, Every Death. War Is Hell. That's Why People Say War Is Hell.

In Other Words, Under Attorney General John Ashcroft, The Fbi, The Ins And The Department Of Justice Are So Out Of Control That They Have Actually Begun To Enforce U.s. Immigration Laws.

Democrats Are Firm Believers In The Welfare State For Their Own Constituents, Whether That's A Crack Addict Mother Of Five Or A Wall Street Banker.

We Need To Execute People Like (john Walker Lindh) In Order To Physically Intimidate Liberals.

It’s Often Said That Those Who Are Unduly Bothered By Gays Are Latent Homosexuals. Isn’t It Possible That People Obsessed With Racism Are Themselves Racist.

I'm Getting A Little Tired Of Politicians Trying To Prove How 'moderate' And 'centrist' They Are By Taking More Of My Money And Freedom. Where's This Center - Somewhere Between Lenin And Stalin?

Conservatives Have A Problem With Women. For That Matter, All Men Do.

The Not-visibly-insane Democrats All Claim They'll Get Rough With The Terrorists, But They Can't Even Face Brit Hume. In Case You Missed This Profile In Democrat Machismo, The Democratic Presidential Candidates Are Refusing To Participate In A Debate Hosted By Fox News Channel Because The Hosts Are "biased." But They'll Face Down Mahmoud Ahmadinejad! At This, Even Hillary Clinton Was Thinking, "come On, Guys - Let's Grow A Pair."

The Spirit Of The First Amendment Has Been Effectively Repealed For Conservative Speech By A Censorious, Accusatory Mob.

Political Debate With Liberals Is Basically Impossible In America Today Because Liberals Are Calling Names While Conservatives Are Trying To Make Arguments.

What Actually Happened During The Clinton Presidency? No One Can Remember Anything About It Except The Bimbos, The Lies, And The Felonies

Being Nice To People Is, In Fact, One Of The Incidental Tenets Of Christianity, As Opposed To Other Religions Whose Tenets Are More Along The Lines Of 'kill Everyone Who Doesn't Smell Bad And Doesn't Answer To The Name Mohammed'

Fundamentalist Religion

I Was Morose That The Era Of Barack Obama Has Returned Us To A Period Where Everything Is Racist, Everyone Is Walking On Eggshells, And You Get The Moral Preening From White Liberals Who Don't Actually Even Know Any Black People. But, Oh, Do They Love To Get On Their High Horses And Accuse Republicans Of Being Racist For Opposing Very Liberal Government Policies And A Very Liberal Democratic President. It's An Extension Of The Civil Rights Label Being Slapped On Gay Marriage And Abortion. Allow Me To Be Bi-partisan For A Moment, And Love This Moment Because It Won't Last Long.

[the Media's] Fantasy Of An America Bristling With Racists Allows Them To Portray Any Criticism Of Our Massively Incompetent And Dangerous President As Just Another Sad Episode Of Oh-so-typical White Racism.

It Is An Article Of Faith With The Democrats That They Must Fool Americans By Simulating Agreement With Normal People. The Winner Of The Democratic Primary Is Always The Candidate Who Does The Best Impersonation Of An American.

Some People Say I'm Really Ugly And Anorexic; Some Say The Only Reason I'm On Tv Is Because I'm Pretty. I Say To Them: Get Your Slander Straight. You Are What You Are, Whether You're Small Or Skinny Or Smart Or Dumb. Just Do What You Do.

...liberals Said The War Was A Failure Because We Hadn't Captured Abu Musab Al-zarqawi. Then We Killed Al-zarqawi And A Half-dozen Of His Aides In An Air Raid. Then They Said The War Was A Failure Because ... You Get The Picture.

Democrats See Our Voluntary Military Supported By Taxpayer Dollars As Their Personal Salvation Army. Self-interested Behavior, Such As Deploying Troops To Serve The Nation, Is Considered Boorish In Manhattan Salons.

The Only Question I'd Be Interested In Is What Books Other Celebrities Have Read Recently, Which Is Part Of My Campaign To Promote Reading.

If Americans Loved Judicial Activism, Liberals Wouldn't Be Lying About What It Is. Judicial Activism Means Making Up Constitutional Rights In Order To Strike Down Laws The Justices Don't Like Based On Their Personal Preferences. It's Not Judicial Activism To Strike Down Laws Because They Violate The Constitution.

Women Like Pamela Harriman And Patricia Duff Are Basically Anna Nicole Smith From The Waist Down. Let's Just Call It For What It Is. They're Whores.

The "european Union" Happens To Be Composed Of People Who Hate Our Guts. It Is The Continent Where Moveon.org-style Lunatics Are The Friendly, Pro-american Types And The Rest Are Crazy Muslims.

In Response To Skyrocketing Gas Prices, Liberals Say, Practically In Unison, 'we Can't Drill Our Way Out Of This Crisis.' What Does That Mean? This Is Like Telling A Starving Man, 'you Can't Eat Your Way Out Of Being Hungry!' 'you Can't Water Your Way Out Of Drought!' 'you Can't Sleep Your Way Out Of Tiredness!' 'you Can't Drink Yourself Out Of Dehydration!' Seriously, What Does It Mean? Finding More Oil Isn't Going To Increase The Supply Of Oil? It Is The Typical Democratic Strategy To Babble Meaningless Slogans, As If They Have A Plan. Their Plan Is: The Permanent Twilight Of The Human Race.

Ironically, Since Obama Was Elected, For The First Time In My Life I'm Sometimes Not Proud Of My Country.

The Beauty Of Being A Liberal Is That History Always Begins This Morning. Every Day Liberals Can Create A New Narrative That Destroys The Past As It Occurred. We Have Always Been At War With Eastasia.

My Libertarian Friends Are Probably Getting A Little Upset Now But I Think That's Because They Never Appreciate The Benefits Of Local Fascism.

Yet, When Republicans Were Finally Able To Push Through Tough Policies On Crime And Welfare Which They'd Supported For Decades, They Were Magnificent Successes For The Entire Country, But Especially For Black People. Release Us, And Great Things Will Happen!

As Long As American Liberals Are Going To Keep Announcing That They're Embarrassed For Their Country, How About Being Embarrassed By Our Public Schools Or By Our Ridiculous Trial Lawyer Culture That Other Countries Find Laughable?

Looking At The Line-up Of Speakers At The (democratic National) Convention, I Have Developed The 7-11 Challenge: I Will Quit Making Fun Of, For Example, Dennis Kucinich, If He Can Prove He Can Run A 7-11 Properly For 8 Hours. We'll Even Let Him Have An Hour Or So Of Preparation Before We Open Up. Within 8 Hours, The Money Will Be Gone, The Store Will Be Empty, And He'll Be Explaining How Three 11-year Olds Came In And Asked For The Money And He Gave It To Them.

Even If Corners Were Cut, (iran-contra) Was A Brilliant Scheme. There Is No Possibility That Anyone In Any Democratic Administration Would Have Gone To Such Lengths To Fund Anti-communist Forces. When Democrats Scheme From The White House, It's To Cover Up The President's Affair With An Intern. When Republicans Scheme, It's To Support Embattled Anti-communist Freedom Fighters Sold Out By The Democrats.

Liberals Say This Over And Over And Over Again To Hide The Actual History, Which Is Why I Go Through The Specifics On The Big Segregationists In The United States Senate, The Ones Who Signed The Southern Manifesto And The Ones Who Voted Against The 1964 Civil Rights Act. There's A Panoply Of Issues To Consider. The First Time They Objected To The Federal Government Doing Something Was When It Came To Civil Rights Legislation. This Is In Stark Contrast To The Very Few Republicans Who Voted Against The '64 Civil Rights Act.

Where There's Smoke Around A Conservative, There Are Journalists Furiously Rubbing Two Sticks Together.

Anorexics Never Have Boyfriends. ... That's One Way To Know You Don't Have Anorexia, If You Have A Boyfriend.

Liberalism Is Part Of A Religious Disorder That Demands A Belief That Life Is Controllable.

Although God Believers Don't Need Evolution To Be False, Atheists Need Evolution To Be True.

Fundamentalist Muslim Terrorists Kill Three Thousand Americans, But America Isn't Supposed To Respond, Because If We Respond, They'll Respond. We Always Hear About 'karmic Retributions' And The 'cycle Of Violence' Only After We've Been Hit.

Swing Voters Are More Appropriately Known As The 'idiot Voters' Because They Have No Set Of Philosophical Principles. By The Age Of Fourteen, You're Either A Conservative Or A Liberal If You Have An Iq Above A Toaster.

Do You Know What Christianity Is? We Believe Your Religion [judaism], But You [jews] Have To Obey.

College Campuses Have Become Fascist Colonies Of Anti-american Hate Speech, Hypersensitivity, Speech Codes, Banded Words And Prohibited Scientific Inquiry.

Since Liberals Never Print Retractions, They Can Say Anything. What They Said In The Past Is Always Deemed Inadmissible And Unfair To Quote.

When Liberals Start Acting Like They're Opposed To Pre-marital Sex And Mothers Having Careers, You Know Mccain's Vice Presidential Choice Has Knocked Them Back On Their Heels.

Democrats Haven't Been This Upset About An American Engaging In Free Speech Since Juanita Broaddrick Opened Her Yap.

Whether They Are Defending The Soviet Union Or Bleating For Saddam Hussein, Liberals Are Always Against America. They Are Either Traitors Or Idiots, And On The Matter Of America's Self-preservation, The Difference Is Irrelevant.

The Media Will Spend Weeks Going Through Pay Stubs For Bush's National Guard Service In Alabama In The Waning Days Of War, But If Kerry Tells Them Exotic Tales Of Covert Missions Into Cambodia Directed By Richard Nixon, They Don't Even Bother To Fact-check Who Was President In December 1968.

I Don't Think I Have An Unkind Word For Any.except Muslims. I've Been Cross With Them Since 9/11 2001. I Can't Remember Why But It Was Something Bad.

The New York Times Editorial Page Is Like A Ouija Board That Has Only Three Answers, No Matter What The Question. The Answers Are: Higher Taxes, More Restrictions On Political Speech And Stricter Gun Control.

Hollywood Liberals Could Not Be Reached For Comment On The Cost Of The Inauguration Because They Were Being Fitted For Gowns And Jewelry Worth Millions Of Dollars In Anticipation Of Oscar Night.

I Think [whitewater]'s Going To Prevent The First Lady From Running For Senate.

The Only Beef Enron Employees Have With Top Management Is That Management Did Not Inform Employees Of The Collapse In Time To Allow Them To Get In On The Swindle. If Enron Executives Had Shouted, "head For The Hills!" The Employees Might Have Had Time To Sucker Other Americans Into Buying Wildly Over-inflated Enron Stock. Just Because Your Boss Is A Criminal Doesn't Make You A Hero.

We've Finally Given Liberals A War Against Fundamentalism, And They Don't Want To Fight It. They Would, Except It Would Put Them On The Same Side As The United States.

Listening To Liberals Invoke The Sanctity Of "science" To Promote Their Crackpot Ideas Creates The Same Uneasy Feeling As Listening To Bill Clinton Cite Scripture.

I Love To Engage In Repartee With People Who Are Stupider Than I Am.

Liberals Pretend To Believe That When Two Random Hoodlums Kill A Gay Man In Oklahoma, It's Evidence Of A National Trend, But When A Million People Buy A Book, It Proves Absolutely Nothing About The Book-buying Public.

Instead Of Seeking Wisdom, Liberals Desire To Be Seen As Clever By Being Counterintuitive, Crazy, And Outre.

Gay Marriage Is A Tricky Issue For The Democrats Due To The Fact That - Like Taxes, Defense And Education - They Are Forced To Lie About Their Position When Running For Office. In Other Words, Democrats Are Gay Marriage Supporters Trapped In The Bodies Of Candidates Who Oppose Gay Marriage. And No Issue-reassignment Surgery Can Help Them.

To Promote The Sales Of Gm Vehicles, Obama Says The Government Will Stand By Your Gm Car Warranty. And All The Taxpayers Will Get A Lube Job.

There Is No More A 'political Middle' Than There Is A Family In America With 2.3 Children. People With Opinions Take Sides. Contrary To What You've Heard, It's Actually More Important To Stand For Something Than It Is For Everybody To 'just Get Along'.

It's Interesting How Obama's Adorers In The Press Keep Comparing Him To Lincoln And Reagan. Apparently They Can't Think Of A Democrat President Worthy Of Being Compared To.

It Confirms My Idea That You Also Need More Liberal Gun Laws. Guns Lead To A Polite Society, As We Like To Say In The United States. And I Think That All Of Western Canada Would Agree With Me.

Liberals Want The Family Destroyed, They Want Religion Destroned, Because Then You Have Loyalty Directly To The State.

There Are Always Going To Be Muslim Atrocities! Whenever The Media Starts Obsessing With Isis, I Think You're Hiding Something.

Hiding Something

If Liberals Were Prevented From Ever Again Calling Republicans Dumb, They Would Be Robbed Of Half Their Arguments. To Be Sure, They Would Still Have Racist, Fascist, Homophobe, Ugly, And A Few Other Highly Nuanced Arguments In The Quiver. But The Loss Of Dumb Would Nearly Cripple Them.

Democrats Should Run Mahmoud Ahmadinejad For President. He's More Coherent Than Dennis Kucinich, He Dresses Like Their Base, He's More Macho Than John Edwards, And He's Willing To Show Up At A Forum Where He Might Get One Hostile Question - Unlike The Current Democratic Candidates For President Who Won't Debate On Fox News Channel. He's Not Married To An Impeached President, And The Name Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Is Surely No More Frightening Than B. Hussein Obama.

I Sort Of Feel Sorry For Gays Being The Last Ones At The Sexual Revolution Window. We've Had Liberalizing Rules On Divorce. We've Had The Sexual Revolution. We've Had, You Know, The Pill, And Burning Bras And Rampant Premarital Sex And Polymorphous Perversity.

We Have Way Too Many Lawyers, The Price For Them Has Plummeted And You Will Have A Miserable And Unsatisfying Life. Unless You Get Into Harvard Law. You Could Be In A Yurt On The Mongolian Plateau And They'll Say, "oh You Must Be Smart. You Went To Harvard Law."

Moore's Only Concession To The Democrats' Role-playing Is To Deny That He Is A Democrat, Hoping Enough Americans Were Taught By Public School Teachers That No One Will Know How To Look Up Moore's Voter Registration Card. Democrat.

Back When They Supported Segregation, Lott And Thurmond Were Democrats.

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