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A Man Has To Find A Good Woman, And When He Finds Her He Has To Win Her Love. Then He Has To Earn Her Respect. Then He Has To Cherish Her Trust. And Then He Has To, Like, Go On Doing That For As Long As They Live. Until They Both Die. That's What It's All About. That's The Most Important Thing In The World. That's What A Man Is, Yaar. A Man Is Truly A Man When He Wins The Love Of A Good Woman, Earns Her Respect, And Keeps Her Trust. Until You Do That, You're Not A Man.

-Gregory David Roberts

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A Man Has To

Gregory David Roberts

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A Man Has To Find A Good Woman, And When He Finds Her He Has To Win Her Love. Then He Has To Earn Her Respect. Then He Has To Cherish Her Trust. And Then He Has To, Like, Go On Doing That For As Long As They Live. Until They Both Die. That's What It's All About. That's The Most Important Thing In The World. That's What A Man Is, Yaar. A Man Is Truly A Man When He Wins The Love Of A Good Woman, Earns Her Respect, And Keeps Her Trust. Until You Do That, You're Not A Man.

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People Say That Love Is The Best Thing In The World Not Power. But They Are Wrong. Love Is The Opposite Of Power And That's Why We Fear It So Much.

None Of Us Lie Or Guard Our Secrets When We Sing, And India Is A Nation Of Singers Whose First Love Is The Kind Of Song We Turn To When Crying Just Isn't Enough.

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Every Human Heart Beat Is A Universe Of Possibilities.

I Sometimes Think That The Size Of Our Happiness Is Inversely Proportional To The Size Of Our House.

The Past Reflects Eternally Between Two Mirrors - The Bright Mirror Of Words And Deeds, And The Dark One, Full Of Things We Didn't Do Or Say.

Poverty And Pride Are Devoted Blood Brothers Until One, Always And Inevitably, Kills The Other.

Food Is Music To The Body, Music Is Food To The Heart.

You Know The Difference Between News And Gossip, Don't You? News Tells You What People Did. Gossip Tells You How Much They Enjoyed It.

There's A Truth Deeper Than Experience. It's Beyond What We See, Or Even What We Feel. It's An Order Of Truth That Separates The Profound From The Merely Clever, And The Reality From The Perception. We're Helpless, Usually, In The Face Of It; And The Cost Of Knowing It, Like The Cost Of Knowing Love, Is Sometimes Greater Than Any Heart Would Willingly Pay. It Doesn't Always Help Us To Love The World, But It Does Prevent Us From Hating The World. And The Only Way To Know That Truth Is To Share It, From Heart To Heart, Just As Prabhakar Told It To Me, Just As I'm Telling It To You Now.

I Look Back, Now, And I Know That The Naming Moment, Which Seemed So Insignificant Then, Which Seemed To Demand No More Than An Arbitrary And Superstitious Yes Or No, Was In Fact A Pivotal Moment In My Life.

Pivotal Moments

A Lot Of Bad Stuff In The World Wasn’t Really That Bad Until Someone Tried To Change It.

You Are Not A Man Until You Give Your Love, Truly And Freely To A Child. And You Are Not A Good Man Until You Earn The Love, Truly And Freely, Of A Child In Return.

The Touch Was Exactly What The Touch Of A Lover's Hand Should Be: Familiar, Yet Exciting As A Whispered Promise. I Felt An Almost Irresistible Urge To Take Her Hand And Place It Flat Against My Chest, Near My Heart. Maybe I Should've Done It. I Know Now That She Would've Laughed, If I'd Done It, And She Would've Liked Me For It. But Strangers That We Were Then, We Stood For Five Long Seconds And Held The Stare, While All The Parallel Worlds, All The Parallel Lives That Might've Been, And Never Would Be, Whirled Around Us.

There Is Nothing So Depressing As Good Advice, And I Will Be Pleased If You Do Not Inflict It Upon Me. Frankly, I Am Shocked At You. You Must Know This, Surely? Some Years Ago I Suffered Such An Offensively Gratuitous Piece Of Good Advice That I Was Depressed For Six Months Afterward. It Was A Very Close Call - I Almost Never Recovered.

Justice Is Not Only The Way We Punish Those Who Do Wrong. It Is Also The Way We Try To Save Them.

Sooner Or Later, Fate Puts Us Together With All The People, One By One, Who Show Us What We Could, And Shouldn’t, Let Ourselves Become. Sooner Or Later We Meet The Drunkard, The Waster, The Betrayer, The Ruthless Mind, And The Hate-filled Heart. But Fate Loads The Dice, Of Course, Because We Usually Find Ourselves Loving Or Pitying Almost All Of Those People. And It’s Impossible To Despise Someone You Honestly Pity, And To Shun Someone You Truly Love.

The Tears, When They Come To Some Men, Are Worse Than Beatings. They're Wounded Worse By Sobbing, Men Like That, Than They Are By Boots And Batons. Tears Begin In The Heart, But Some Of Us Deny The Heart So Often, And For So Long, That When It Speaks We Hear Not One But A Hundred Sorrows In The Heartbreak. We Know That Crying Is A Good And Natural Thing. We Know That Crying Isn't A Weakness, But A Kind Of Strength. Still, The Weeping Rips Us Root By Tangled Root From The Earth, And We Crash Like Fallen Trees When We Cry.

Sometimes You Have To Lose To Win

The Only Victory That Really Counts In Prison Is Survival. But Survival Means More Than Simply Being Alive. It's Not Just The Body That Must Survive A Jail Term; The Spirit And The Will And The Heart Have To Make It Through As Well. If Any One Of Them Is Broken Or Destroyed, The Man Whose Living Body Walks Through The Gate, At The End Of His Sentence, Can't Be Said To Have Survived It. And It's For Those Small Victories Of The Heart, And The Spirit, And The Will That We Sometimes Risk The Body That Cradles Them.

Powerful People Have No Regrets.

Friendship Is Something That Gets Harder To Understand, Every Damn Year Of My Life.friendship Is Like A Kind Of Algebra Test That Nobody Passes. In My Worst Moods, I Think The Best You Can Say Is That A Friend Is Anyone You Don't Despise.

There’s Too Much Love In The World. Sometimes I Think That’s What Heaven Is---- A Place Where Everybody’s Happy Because Nobody Loves Anybody Else, Ever.

Cowardece Is Often Just Another Name For Being Taken By Surprise.

Fate Always Gives You Two Choices, The One You Should Take, And The One You Do.

I Don't Know What Frightens Me More

If We Can't Respect The Way We Earn It, Money Has No Value. If We Can't Use It To Make Life Better For Our Families And Loved Ones, Money Has No Purpose.

Crime Is Stupid, Lazy And Weak. You Can Only Exploit It And Make Money Out Of It.

That's How They Manage To Live Together, A Billion Of Them, In Reasonable Peace. They Are Not Perfect, Of Course. They Know How To Fight And Lie And Cheat Each Other, And All The Things That All Of Us Do. But More Than Any Other People In The World, The Indians Know How To Love One Another.

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Never Let Anyone Know What You're Thinking - Always Know What The Other Thinks Of You.

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The Only Force More Ruthless And Cynical Than The Business Of Big Politics Is The Politics Of Big Business.

Luck Is What Happens To You When Fate Gets Tired Of Waiting

Every Virtuous Act Has Some Dark Secret In Its Heart; Every Risk We Take Contains A Mystery That Can’t Be Solved.

The More You Try To Be Like Someone Else, The More You Find Yourself Standing In The Way.

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If You Make Your Heart Into A Weapon, You End Up Using It On Yourself.

The World Is Run By One Million Evil Men, Ten Million Stupid Men, And A Hundred Million Cowards.

More Dreams Are Realised And Extinguished In Bombay Than Any Other Place In India.

I Think That We All, Each One Of Us, We All Have To Earn Our Future.

Slowly, Desolately, The Fist Of What We'd Done Unclenched The Clawed Palm Of What We'd Become.

Some Feelings Sink So Deep Into The Heart That Only Loneliness Can Help You Find Them Again. Some Truths Are So Painful That Only Shame Can Help You Live With Them. Some Things Are So Sad That Only Your Soul Can Do The Crying For Them.

A Man Is Truly A Man When He Wins The Love Of A Good Woman, Earns Her Respect, And Keeps Her Trust. Until You Can Do That, You're Not A Man.

The Burden Of Happiness Can Only Be Relieved By The Balm Of Suffering.

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When You Judge The Power That Is In A Person, You Must Judge Their Capacities As Both Friend And As Enemy.

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A Man Trusts Another Man When He Sees Enough Of Himself In Him.

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Be True To Love Where Ever You Find It, And Be True To Yourself And Everything That You Really Are.

Be True To Yourself

True To Yourself

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Anything That Can Be Put In A Nut Shell Should Remain There.

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Finding Yourself

The Truth Is That There Are No Good Men, Or Bad Men,' He Said. 'it Is The Deeds That Have Goodness Or Badness In Them. There Are Good Deeds, And Bad Deeds. Men Are Just Men - It Is What They Do, Or Refuse To Do, That Links Them To Good And Evil. The Truth Is That An Instant Of Real Love, In The Heart Of Anyone - The Noblest Man Alive Or The Most Wicked - Has The Whole Purpose And Process And Meaning Of Life Within The Lotus-folds Of Its Passion. The Truth Is That We Are All, Every One Of Us, Every Atom, Every Galaxy, And Every Particle Of Matter In The Universe, Moving Toward God.

And Money, If The Pile Gets High Enough, Is Something Like A Big Political Party: It Does As Much Harm As It Does Good, It Puts Too Much Power In Too Few Hands, And The Closer You Come To It The Dirtier You Get.

If You Could Be Happy, Really Happy, For Just A While, But You Knew From The Start That It Would End In Sadness, And Bring Pain Afterwards, Would You Choose To Have That Happiness Or Would You Avoid It?

Its A Fact Of Being In Love That We Often Pay No Attention Whatsoever To The Substance Of What A Lover Says, While Being Intoxicated To Ecstasy By The Way It's Said. I Was In Love With Her Eyes, But I Didn't Read Them. I Loved Her Voice, But I Didn't Really Hear The Fear & The Anguish In It.

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Some Of The Worst Wrongs, Were Caused By People Who Tried To Change Things.

When The Wish And The Fear Are Exactly The Same, We Call The Dream A Nightmare.

Heroes Only Come In Three Kinds:dead, Damaged Or Dubious.

The Most Precious Gift You Can Bring To Your Lover Is Your Suffering.

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There's No Believing In God...we Either Know God, Or We Don't.

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Some Loves Are Like That. Your Heart Starts To Feel Like An Overcrowded Lifeboat. You Throw Your Pride Out To Keep It Afloat, & Your Self-respect & Independence. After A While You Start Throwing People Out - Friends, Everyone You Know. & It's Still Not Enough. The Lifeboat Is Still Sinking, & You Know It's Going To Take You Down With It. I've Seen That Happen To A Lot Of People. I Think That's Why I'm Sick Of Love. - Karla

Once You Love Something, You Can Never Stop Loving It. Even After A Divorce, The Heart Will Not Stop Loving.

Never Stop Loving

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We Have A Saying In Marseilles: A Man In No Hurry Gets Nowhere Fast. I Have Been In No Hurry For Eight Years.

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Because My Life Has Been So Notorious And So Bad, It Can Overshadow My Work.

It Isn't A Secret, Unless Keeping It Hurts.

Friendship Is Also A Kind Of Medicine, And The Markets For It, Too, Are Sometimes Black.

Didier Once Told Me, In A Rambling, Midnight Dissertation, That A Dream Is The Place Where A Wish And A Fear Meet. When The Wish And The Fear Are Exactly The Same, He Said, We Call The Dream A Nightmare.

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Nothing Ever Fits The Palm So Perfectly, Or Feels So Right, Or Inspires So Much Protective Instinct As The Hand Of A Child

Good Soldiers Are Defined By What They Can Endure, Not By What They Can Inflict.

The Amount Of Force And Violence Necessary To Board The Train, For Example Was No Less And No More Than The Amoount Of Politeness And Consideration Necessary To Ensure That The Cramped Journey Was As Pleasant As Possible Afterwards. What Is Necessary? That Was The Unspoken But Implied, And Unavoidable Question Everywhere In India.

Every Life, Every Love, Every Action And Feeling And Thought Has Its Reason And Significance: Its Beginning, And The Part It Plays In The End. Sometimes, We Do See.

The Truth Is That The Man I Am Was Born In Those Moments, As I Stood Near The Flood Sticks With My Face Lifted To The Chrismal Rain. Shantaram. The Better Man That, Slowly, And Much Too Late, I Began To Be.

Friendship Is An Algebra Test That Nobody Passes.

For This Is What We Do. Put One Foot Forward And Then The Other. Lift Our Eyes To The Snarl And Smile Of The World Once More. Think. Act. Feel. Add Our Little Consequence To The Tides Of Good And Evil That Flood And Drain The World. Drag Our Shadowed Crosses Into The Hope Of Another Night. Push Our Brave Hearts Into The Promise Of A New Day. With Love; The Passionate Search For Truth Other Than Our Own. With Longing; The Pure, Ineffable Yearning To Be Saved. For So Long As Fate Keeps Waiting, We Live On.

Nothing Grieves More Deeply Or Pathetically Than One Half Of A Great Love That Isn’t Meant To Be.

The Truth Is A Bully We All Pretend To Like

If Fate Doesn't Make You Laugh, You Just Don't Get The Joke.

What Is It?" She Asked. "i'm Looking For Your Wings. You Are My Guardian Angel, Aren't You?" "i'm Afraid Not," She Replied, Her Cheeks Dimplingwith A Wry Smile. "there's Too Much Of The Devil In Me For That." "just How Much Devil," I Grinned, "are We Talking About Here?

Civilization, After All, Is Defined By What We Forbid, More Than What We Permit.

One Of The Ironies Of Courage, And The Reason Why We Prize It So Highly, Is That We Find It Easier To Be Brave For Someone Else Than We Do For Ourselves Alone.

I Think The Novel Form Chose Me. I Was A Writer Before I Became A Criminal... My First Instinct Was To Write.

While I Was Chained To A Wall And Being Tortured, I Realized, Through The Screaming Of My Mind, That Even In That Shackled, Bloody Helplessness, I Was Still Free: Free To Hate The Men Who Were Torturing Me, Or To Forgive Them. It Doesn't Sound Like Much, I Know. But In The Flinch And Bite Of The Chain, When It's All You've Got, That Freedom Is A Universe Of Possibility. And The Choice You Make Between Hating And Forgiving, Can Become The Story Of Your Life.

At First, When We Truly Love Someone, Our Greatest Fear Is That The Loved One Will Stop Loving Us. What We Should Fear And Dread, Of Course, Is That We Won't Stop Loving Them, Even After They're Dead And Gone.

But In A Way You Can Say That After Leaving The Sea, After All Those Millions Of Years Of Living Inside Of The Sea, We Took The Ocean With Us. When A Woman Makes A Baby, She Gives It Water, Inside Her Body, To Grow In. That Water Inside Her Body Is Almost Exactly The Same As The Water Of The Sea. It Is Salty, By Just The Same Amount. She Makes A Little Ocean, In Her Body. And Not Only This. Our Blood And Our Sweating, They Are Both Salty, Almost Exactly Like The Water From The Sea Is Salty. We Carry Oceans Inside Of Us, In Our Blood And Our Sweat. And We Are Crying The Oceans, In Our Tears.

Love Is The Passionate Search For A Truth Other Than Your Own; And Once You Feel It, Honestly And Completely, Love Is Forever.

A City May Be Dirty On The Outside But Is Clean On The Inside. Many Cities In The World Are Clean On The Outside But Dirty On The Inside.

It Doesnt Always Help Us To Love The World,but It Does Prevent Us From Hating The World.

A Wise Man Once Told Me- He’s A Muslim By The Way- That He Has More In Common With A Jew Than He Does A Fanatic Of His Own Religion. He Has More In Common With A Rational, Reasonable-minded Christian Or A Buddhist Or Hindu Than He Does With A Fanatic Of His Own Religion. In Fact, He Has More In Common With A Ration, Reasonable-minded Atheist Than He Does With A Fanatic Of His Own Religion

Let Me Explain Something To You. Look Around Here. How Many People Do You Count? Sixty, Eighty, Eighty People? Greeks, Germans, Italians, French, Americans. Tourists From Everywhere. Eating, Drinking, Talking, Laughing. And From Bombay - Indians And Iranians And Afghans And Arabs And Africans. But How Many Of These People Have Real Power, Real Destiny, Real Dynamic For Their Place, And Their Time, And The Lives Of Thousand Of People? I Will Tell You - Four. Four People In This Room With Power, And The Rest Are Like The Rest Of The People Everywhere: Powerless, Sleepers In The Dream.

There Is No Man, And No Place, Without War. The Only Thing We Can Do Is Choose A Side, And Fight. That Is The Only Choice We Get - Who We Fight For, Who We Fight Against. That Is Life.

A Politician Is Someone Who Promises A Bridge Even When There's No Water

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Praising People Behind Their Back Is Monstrously Unfair, Because The One Thing You Can't Defend Yourself Against Is The Good That People Say About You.

There's No Such Thing As Forever.

We Carry Oceans Inside Of Us, In Our Blood And Our Sweat. And We Are Crying The Oceans, In Our Tears.

I Know Now That When The Loving, Honest Moment Comes It Should Be Seized, And Spoken, Because It May Never Come Again. And Unvoiced, Unmoving, Unlived In The Things We Declare Form Heart To Heart, Those True And Real Feelings Wither And Crumble In The Remembering Hand That Tries Too Late To Reach For Them.

Suffering Is How We Test Our Love Especially Our Love For God.

The Cloak Of The Past Is Cut From Patches Of Feeling ,and Sewn With Rebus Threads.most Of The Time , The Best We Can Do Is Wrap It Around Ourselves For Comfort Or Drag It Behind Us As We Struggle To Go On .

Fate Gives All Of Us Three Teachers, Three Friends, Three Enemies, And Three Great Loves In Our Lives. But These Twelve Are Always Disguised, And We Can Never Know Which One Is Which Until We’ve Loved Them, Left Them, Or Fought Them.

It's Forgiveness That Makes Us What We Are. Without Forgiveness, Our Species Would've Annihilated Itself In Endless Retributions. Without Forgiveness, There Would Be No History. Without That Hope, There Would Be No Art, For Every Work Of Art Is In Some Way An Act Of Forgiveness. Without That Dream, There Would Be No Love, For Every Act Of Love Is In Some Way A Promise To Forgive. We Live On Because We Can Love, And We Love Because We Can Forgive.

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At First, When We Truly Love Someone, Our Greatest Fear Is That The Loved One Will Stop Loving Us. What We Should Fear And Dread, Of Course, Is That We Wont Stop Loving Them, Even After They Are Dead And Gone. For I Still Love You With The Whole Of My Heart. I Still Love You. And Sometimes, My Friend, The Love That I Have And Cant Give To You, Crushed The Breast From My Chest. Soemtimes, Even Now, My Heart Is Drowning In A Sorrow That Has No Stars Without You, And No Laughter, And No Sleep.

Whatever You Do, In The Privacy Of Your Own Rain Shower, Is Your Own Business

Do You Know The Story Of The Scorpion And The Frog? You Know, The Frog Agrees To Carry The Scorpion Across The River, Because The Scorpion Promises Not To Sting Him. And Then The Scorpion Stings The Frog, Half Way Across The River. The Drowning Frog Asks Him Why He Did It, When They'll Both Drown, And The Scorpion Says That He's A Scorpion, And It's His Nature To Sting.

Happiness Is A Myth. It Was Invented To Make Us Buy New Things.

Prisons Are The Temples Where Devils Learn To Prey. Every Time We Turn The Key We Twist The Knife Of Fate, Because Every Time We Cage A Man We Close Him In With Hate.

Shantaram Is The Second In The Series Of A Quartet Of Novels That I Have Planned About My Life But Is The First To Be Written. The Third Book Is A Sequel To Shantaram, The First A Prequel.

I Take Everything Personally- That's What Being A Person Is All About.

Every Virtuous Act Is Inspired By A Dark Secret.

The Voice, Afghan Matchmakers Say, Is More Than Half Of Love.

One, What Would Happen If Everyone Did This Thing? Two, Would This Help Or Hinder The Movement Toward Universal Ultimate Complexity?

There Are No Mistakes. Only New Paths To Explore.

The Only Power That Has Any Real Meaning Is The Power To Better The World.

Sometimes You Break Your Heart In The Right Way, If You Know What I Mean.

You Can Never Tell What People Have Inside Them Until You Start Taking It Away, One Hope At A Time

The Real Trick In Life Is To Want Nothing, And To Succeed In Getting It. - Karla

Nothing In The World Is So Soft And Pleasing To The Touch, As The Skin Of A Woman's Thigh. No Flower, Feather Or Fabric, Can Match That Velvet Whisper Of Flesh. No Matter How Unequal They May Be In Any Other Ways, All Women, Old And Young, Fat And Thin, Beautiful And Ugly, Have That Perfection. It's A Great Part Of The Reason Why Men Hunger To Possess Women, And So Often Convince Themselves That They Do Possess Them: The Thigh, That Touch.

Oh, Of Course, Naturally, God Is Impossible. That Is The First Proof That He Exists." Nothing Exists As We See It. Nothing We See Is Really There, As We Think We Are Seeing It. Our Eyes Are Liars. Everything That Seems Real, Is Merely Part Of The Illusion.

Glory Belongs To God, Of Course; That's What The Word Really Means. And You Can't Serve God With A Gun.

You Can't Kill Love. You Can't Even Kill It With Hate. You Can Kill In-love, And Loving, And Even Loveliness. You Can Kill Them All, Or Numb Them Into Dense, Leaden Regret, But You Can't Kill Love Itself. Love Is The Passionate Search For A Truth Other Than Your Own; And Once You Feel It, Honestly And Completely, Love Is Forever. Every Act Of Love, Every Moment Of The Heart Reaching Out, Is A Part Of The Universal Good: It's A Part Of God, Or What We Call God, And It Can Never Die.

Sometimes We Love With Nothing More Than Hope. Sometimes We Cry With Everything Except Tears.

Love Is The Opposite Of Power. That's Why We Fear It So Much.

While The Foods Were Being Prepared, I Watched As Men Dragged A Foot-operated Grinding Wheel Into An Open Space, And The Groom Devoted A Tense Hour To Putting A Razor's Edge To A Large, Ornate Dagger. The Bride's Father Watched That Effort With A Critical Eye. After Satisfying Himself That The Weapon Was Suitably Lethal, He Gravely Accepted It As A Gift From The Younger Man. The Groom Has Just Sharpened The Knife That The Bride's Father Will Use On Him, If He Ever Mistreats The Girl.

The Man Grinned Back At Me With That Perfect Sincerity We Fear And Call Simple-minded.

Silence Is The Tortured Man's Revenge.

But The Soul Has No Culture. The Soul Has No Nations. The Soul Has No Colour Or Accent Or Way Of Life. The Soul Is Forever. The Soul Is One. And When The Heart Has Its Moment Of Truth And Sorrow, The Soul Can't Be Stilled.

Optimism Is The First Cousin Of Love, And It's Exactly Like Love In Three Ways: It's Pushy, It Has No Real Sense Of Humour, And It Turns Up Where You Least Expect It.

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In The Face Of All That Is So Wrong With The World, The Very Worst Thing You Can Do Is Survive. And Yet You Must Survive. It Is This Dilemma That Makes Us Believe And Cling To The Lie That We Have A Soul, And That There Is A God Who Cares About Its Fate.

A Man Has To Find A Good Woman, And When He Finds Her He Has To Win Her Love. Then He Has To Earn Her Respect. Then He Has To Cherish Her Trust. And Then He Has To, Like, Go On Doing That For As Long As They Live. Until They Both Die. That's What It's All About. That's The Most Important Thing In The World. That's What A Man Is, Yaar. A Man Is Truly A Man When He Wins The Love Of A Good Woman, Earns Her Respect, And Keeps Her Trust. Until You Do That, You're Not A Man.

Of Course I Wanted To Know. I Was A Writer. I Wanted To Know Everything.

Fanatics Have The Look Of People Who Do Not Masturbate But Who Think About It Almost All Time.

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