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You Never Know!” Neith Snapped. “the Point Is, I’ll Survive The Apocalypse. I Can Live Off The Land!” She Jabbed A Finger At Me. “did You Know The Palm Tree Has Six Different Edible Parts?” “um—” “and I’ll Never Be Bored,” Neith Continued, “since I’m Also The Goddess Of Weaving. I Have Enough Twine For A Millennium Of Macramé!” I Had No Reply, As I Wasn’t Sure What Macramé Was.

-Rick Riordan

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You Never Know!” Neith

Rick Riordan

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You Never Know!” Neith Snapped. “the Point Is, I’ll Survive The Apocalypse. I Can Live Off The Land!” She Jabbed A Finger At Me. “did You Know The Palm Tree Has Six Different Edible Parts?” “um—” “and I’ll Never Be Bored,” Neith Continued, “since I’m Also The Goddess Of Weaving. I Have Enough Twine For A Millennium Of Macramé!” I Had No Reply, As I Wasn’t Sure What Macramé Was.

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Hestia Shook Her Head. "i Am Here Because When All Else Fails, When All The Other Mighty Gods Have Gone Off To War, I Am All That's Left. Home. Hearth. I Am The Last Olympian

We Need A Shroud. A Shroud For The Son Of Hermes.

But... You're Still Getting Married?" Grover Sounded Hurt. "who's The Bride?" Ploypemus Looked Toward The Boiling Pot. Clarisse Made A Strangled Sound. "oh, No! You Can't Be Serious. I'm Not-

I Remembered The Myth About Andromeda And How She Had Been Chained To A Rock By Her Own Parents As A Sacrifice To A Sea Monster. Maybe She'd Gotten Too Many F's On Her Report Card Or Something.

Sadie," He Said Forlornly, "when You Become A Parent, You May Understand This. One Of My Hardest Jobs As A Father, One Of My Greatest Duties, Was To Realize That My Own Dreams, My Own Goals And Wishes, Are Secondary To My Children's.

Hazel Blinked. “two Gods Had A Horse For A Kid?” “long Story.

Eat Bitter, Taste Sweet," Frank Said. "i Hate That Proverb." "but It's True. What Do They Call It These Days---no Pain, No Gain? Same Concept. You Do The Easy Thing, The Appealing Thing, The Peaceful Thing, Mostly It Turns Out Sour In The End. But If You Take The Hard Path---ah, That's How You Reap The Sweet Rewards. Duty. Sacrifice. They Mean Something.

Whoa, Boy, He Told Himself. Golden Rule For Demigods: Thou Shalt Not Hokey Pokey With Psychos.

I Past Another Telkhine, Who Was So Startled He Dropped His Lil' Demons Lunch Box. I Left Him Alive - Partly Because He Had A Cool Lunch Box.

[my Mom's] Funny That Way, Celebrating Special Occasions With Blue Food. I Think It's Her Way Of Saying Anything Is Possible. Percy Can Pass Seventh Grade. Waffles Can Be Blue. Little Miracles Like That.

I Want A Room Decorated With Bones!" Dan Said. "where'd They Come From?" "cemeteries," Amy Said. "back In The 1700s, The Cemeteries Were Getting Overcrowded, So They Decided To Dig Up Tons Of Old Bodies–all Their Bones–and Move Them Into The Catacombs. The Thing Is...look At The Dates. See When They Started Moving Bones Into The Catacombs?" Dan Squinted At The Screen. He Didn't See What She Was Talking About. "is It My Birthday?

Just Tell Me, Percy, Do You Still Have The Birthday Gift I Gave You Last Summer?" I Nodded And Pulled Out My Camp Necklace. It Had A Bead For Every Summer I'd Been At Camp Half-blood, But Since Last Year I'd Also Kept A Sand Dollar On The Cord. My Father Had Given It To Me For My Fifteenth Birthday. He'd Told Me I Would Know When To "spend It," But So Far I Hadn't Figured Out What He Meant. All I Knew That It Didn't Fit The Vending Machines In The School Cafeteria.

Sure, Sis!' Then He Raised His Hands In A Stop Everything Gesture. 'i Feel A Haiku Coming On.

The Ancient Egyptians Were Not Fools, Carter. They Built The Pyramids. They Created The First Great Nation State. Their Civilization Lasted Thousands Of Years.” “yeah,” I Said. “and Now They’re Gone.

[tyson] Looked Him Over With That Massive Baby-brown Eye. “you Are Not Dead. I Like It When You Are Not Dead.” Ella Fluttered To The Ground And Began Preening Her Feathers. “ella Found A Dog,” She Announced. “a Large Dog. And A Cyclops.” Was She Blushing? Before Percy Could Decide, His Black Mastiff Pounced On Him, Knocking Percy To The Ground And Barking So Loudly That Even Arion Backed Up. “hey, Mrs. O'leary,” Percy Said. “yeah, I Love You, Too, Girl. Good Dog.” Hazel Squeaked. “you Have A Hellhound Named Mrs. O'leary?” “long Story.

The Forge Looked Like A Steam-powered Locomotive Had Smashed Into The Greek Parthenon And They Had Fused Together.

So You've Got No Name?" I Asked. "they Couldn't Think Of One Ugly Enough?" The Creature Snarled, Stepping Over The Unconscious Policeman. "set Animal Is Too Hard To Say," I Decided. "i'll Call You Leroy." Apparently, Leroy Didn't Like His Name. He Lunged.

It's Funny How Humans Can Wrap Their Mind Around Things And Fit Them Into Their Version Of Reality.

How Does It Taste?” Carter Wondered. Zia Smiled. “stick Out Your Tongue.” To Answer Carter’s Question, The Tattoo Tasted Like Burning Car Tires. “ugh.” I Spit A Blue Gob Of “order And Harmony” Into The Fountain.

Percy Frowned "you Have A Feast For Tuna?

My Experience With Khonsu Had Taught Me Not Be Greedy About Time. It Was Best To Appreciate What You Had And Not Yearn For More.

I Pictured My Mom, Alone In Our Little Apartment On The Upper East Side. I Tried To Remember The Smell Of Her Blue Waffles In The Kitchen. It Seemed So Far Away.

No!" Leo Yelled. "uhhh," Nico Groaned From The Floor. "piper!" Jason Cried. "monkey!" Frank Yelled. "not Monkeys," Hazel Grumbled. "i Think Those Are Dwarfs." "stealing My Stuff!" Leo Yelled, And Ran For The Stairs.

He Could Still See The Dragon Just Fine. It Was About Sixty Feet Long, Snout To Tail, Its Body Made Of Interlocking Bronze Plates. Its Claws Were The Size Of Butcher Knives, And Its Mouth Was Lined With Hundreds Of Dagger-sharp Metal Teeth. Steam Came Out Of Its Nostrils. It Snarled Like A Chain Saw Cutting Through A Tree.

We Had Enough Quite Enough Snobbery In This World Without Exporting It To The Hereafter.

All Invincible And Stuff

Then She Did Something That Really Surprised Me. She Blinked Back Tears And Put Out Her Arms. I Stepped Forward And Hugged Her. Butterflies Started Turning My Stomach Into A Mosh Pit. "hey, It's... It's Okay." I Patted Her Back. I Was Aware Of Everything In The Room. I Felt Like I Could Read The Tiniest Print On Any Book On The Shelves. Annabeth's Hair Smelled Like Lemon Soap. She Was Shivering.

Stop Smiling!” She Ordered. “i Can See You, Carter. Oh…and, Uh, Hullo, Walt.” The Pot Monster Made Squeaky Grinding Noises As It Stood Up Straight. One Clunky Arm Rose And Tried To Fix Sadie’s Nonexistent Hair. Leave It To Sadie To Be Self-conscious Around Boys, Even When She’s Made Out Of Pots And Duct Tape.

He Had A Crush On A Blueberry Bush Once.

Meat!" He Said Scornfully. "i'm A Vegetarian." You Eat Cheese Enchiladas And Aluminum Cans," I Reminded Him. Those Are Vegetables.

Curse Us Eh/i'll Make You Pay!/i Don't Want To Rhyme All Day!

Could I Just Use The Loo?” I Asked The Nice Officer. “no.” She Closed The Door In My Face, As If I Might Rig An Explosion In The Toilet. Honestly.

Chiron, I Don't Think The Attic Is The Proper Place For Our New Oracle, Do You?" "no, Indeed." Chiron Looked A Lot Better Now That Apollo Had Worked Some Medical Magic On Him. "rachel May Use A Guest Room In The Big House For Now, Until We Give The Matter More Thought." "i'm Thinking A Cave In The Hills," Apollo Mused. "with Torches And A Big Purple Curtain Over The Entrance . . . Really Mysterious. But Inside, A Totally Decked-out Pad With A Game Room And One Of Those Home Theater Systems.

We Speak With One Voice,” Walt Said. “especially On This Matter. No One Hurts Sadie Kane.

Images Flashed Through His Mind. He Saw Nico And His Sister On A Snowy Mountain Cliff In Maine, Percy Jackson Protecting Them From The Manticore. Percy's Sword Gleamed In The Dark. He'd Been The First Demigod Nico Had Ever Seen In Action. Later At Camp Half-blood, Percy Took Nico By The Arm, Promising To Keep His Sister Bianca Safe. Nico Believed Him. Nico Looked Into His Sea-green Eyes And Though, How Can He Possibly Fail? This Is A Real Hero.

Leo: I'm Almost Out Of Gas! Woah, That Came Out Wrong. I Meant The Burning Kind!

[iris] Squeezed His Hand. "don't Lose Hope, Frank. Rainbows Always Stand For Hope.

We Can’t Make A Portal—” “we’ve Got A Flying Boat,” Carter Offered.

The Most Dangerous Flaws Are Those Which Are Good In Moderation.

Carter Started Down The Stairs, But I Grabbed His Arm. “hang On. What About Traps?” He Frowned. “traps?” “didn’t Egyptian Tombs Have Traps?” “well…sometimes. But This Isn’t A Tomb. Besides, More Often They Had Curses, Like The Burning Curse, The Donkey Curse—” “oh, Lovely. That Sounds So Much Better.

He Was Beautiful The Way An Angel Is Beautiful - Timeless, Perfect, Remote.

Zia Turned Toward Us, Her Expression Grim. “i Will Show You To Your Quarters. In The Morning, Your Testing Begins. We Will See What Magic You Know, And How You Know It.” I Wasn’t Sure What She Meant By That, But I Exchanged An Uneasy Look With Sadie. “sounds Fun,” Sadie Ventured. “and It We Fail This Test?” Zia Regarded Her Coldly. “this Is Not The Sort Of Test You Fail, Sadie Kane. You Pass Or You Die.

Aretmis Gripped Her Bow. “let Us Pray I Am Wrong.” Can Goddesses Pray?

Gods And Goddesses

There," Zoë Suggested."by The Embarcadero Building." "good Thinking," Chuck Said. "me And Hank Can Blend In With The Pigeons." We All Looked At Him. "kidding," He Said. "sheesh, Can't A Statues Have A Sense Of Humor?

You Have To Be Compelled To Write. If You’re Not, Nothing Else That You Do Matters.

Fairness Does Not Mean Everyone Gets The Same. Fairness Means Everyone Gets What They Need.

I Need To Talk To Clarisse," Annabeth Said. I Stared At Her As If She'd Just Said "i Need To Eat A Large, Smelly Boot." "what For?

When In Doubt, Start From The Top. -jason Grace

I Could Hear Hopefulness In Her Voice, But Also Doubt. She Was Waiting For Me To Admit The Obvious: I'd Forgotten. I Was Toast. I Was Boyfriend Roadkill. Just Because I Forgot, You Shouldn't Take That As A Sign I Didn't Care About Annabeth. Seriously, The Last Month With Her Had Been Awesome. I Was The Luckiest Demigod Ever. But A Special Dinner... When Had I Mentioned That? Maybe I'd Said It After Annabeth Kissed Me, Which Had Sort Of Sent Me Into A Fog. Maybe A Greek Gos Had Disguised Himself As Me As And Made Her That Promise As A Prank. Or Maybe I Was Just A Rotten Boyfriend.

How Do You Have Five Children In A Row, Each On A Different Say?” “they’re Gods,” Carter Said. “they Can Do Stuff Like That.

We Choose To Believe In Ma'at. We Create Order Out Of Chaos, Beauty Out Of Ugly Randomness. That's What Egypt Is All About.

"anybody Have Money?" Frank Checked His Pockets. "three Denarii From Camp Jupiter. Five Dollars Canadian." Hedge Patted His Gym Shorts And Pulled Out What He Found. "three Quarters, Two Dimes, A Rubber Band And - Score! A Piece Of Celery." He Started Munching On The Celery, Eyeing The Change And The Rubber Band Like They Might Be Next.

Leo Fell In Love With Every Girl He Saw-as Long As She Was Completely Out Of His League.

They Both (thalia And Hera) Glared At Her, And For Three Long Seconds, Piper Wasn’t Sure Which One Of Them Was Going To Kill Her First.

I Could Have Killed You.” “or I Could Have Killed You,” Percy Said. Jason Shrugged. “if There’d Been An Ocean In Kansas, Maybe.” “i Don’t Need An Ocean—” “boys,” Annabeth Interrupted, “i’m Sure You Both Would’ve Been Wonderful At Killing Each Other. But Right Now, You Need Some Rest.” Food First,” Percy Said. “please?

Perseus, You Are Not The Hero.

Five Shall Go West To The Goddess In Chains, One Shall Be Lost In The Land Without Rain, The Bane Of Olympus Shows The Trail, Campers And Hunters Combined Prevail, The Titan's Curse Must One Withstand, And One Shall Perish By A Parent's Hand

Aphrodite Strikes Again, Huh? You're Gonna Be The Best-dressed Warrior In Town, Beauty Queen.

I Have Moments Like That Alot, When My Brain Falls Asleep Or Something, And The Next Thing I Know I've Missed Something, As If A Puzzle Piece Fell Out Of The Universe And Left Me Staring At The Blank Place Behind It. -- Percy Jackson

The Wind Blowing Through My Ripped Clothes Was So Cold That I Felt Like A Percysicle.

Beckendorf Closed Eyes Tight And Brought His Hand Up To His Watch. From That Distance, The Explosion Shook The World. Heat Seared The Back Of My Head. The Princess Andromeda Blew Up From Both Sides, A Massive Fireball Of Green Flame Roiling Into The Dark Sky, Consuming Everything....i Stared Out The Window Into Deep Blue Water. Beckendorf Was Supposed To Go To College In The Fall. He Had A Girlfriend, Lots Of Friends, His Whole Life Ahead Of Him. He Couldn't Be Gone.

Grover Didn't Say Anything For Awhile. Then, When I Thought He Was Going To Give Me Some Deep Philosophical Comment To Make Me Feel Better, He Said, "can I Have Your Apple?

"bloated!" He Cried. The Corresponding Hieroglyph Flew Through The Air, Bursting Against A Demon's Chest In A Spray Of Light. Instantly, The Demon Swelled Like A Water Balloon And Rolled Screaming Down The Pyramid. "flat!" Thoth Blasted Another Demon, Who Collapsed And Shriveled Into A Monster-shaped Doormat. "intestinal Problems!" Thoth Yelled. The Poor Demon Who Got Zapped With That One Turned Green And Doubled Over.

Everybody-even Monsters-needed A Little Attention Once In A While.

Save Yourselves!" Percy Warned. "it Is Too Late For Us!" Then He Gasped And Pointed To The Spot Where Frank Was Hiding. "oh No! Frank Is Turning Into A Crazy Dolphin!" Nothing Happened. "i Said," Percy Repeated, "frank Is Turning Into A Crazy Dolphin." Frank Stumbled Out Of Nowhere, Making A Big Show Of Grabbing His Throat. "oh No," He Said, Like He Was Reading From A Teleprompter, "i Am Turning Into A Crazy Dolphin.

Elections Only Happen In Two Ways," Reyna Said. "either The Legion Raises Someone On A Shield After A Major Success On The Battlefield-and We Haven't Had Any Major Battles-or We Hold A Ballot On The Evening Of June 24, At The Feast Of Fortuna. That's In Five Days." Percy Frowned. "you Have A Feast For Tuna?

Die, Enemies Of Ra!" Sekhemet Yelled. "perish In Agony!" "she's Almost As Annoying As You," I Told Horus. "impossible," Horus Said. "no One Bests Horus.

We’re On The Moon,” Sadie Murmured. “el Paso, Texas,” Bast Corrected.

She Had To Face The Fact That She Couldn't Protect Everyone She Loved. She Couldn't Solve Every Problem.

I Thought Maybe He Was Seeing Another Tree. - Juniper

Wow," Thalia Muttered. "apollo Is Hot." "he's The Sun God," I Said. "that's Not What I Meant.

Otrera Stayed Dead The Second Time," Kinzie Said, Batting Her Eyes. "we Have To Thank You For That. If You Ever Need A New Girlfriend...well, I Think You'd Look Great In An Iron Collar And An Orange Jumpsuit." Percy Couldn't Tell If She Was Kidding Or Not. He Politely Thanked Her And Changed Seats.

My Sister, With Her Ratty Red-highlighted Hair And Her Linen Pajamas And Her Combat Boots—how Could She Possibly Worry About Being Possessed By A Goddess? What Goddess Would Want Her, Except The Goddess Of Chewing Gum?

We'd Just Released A Zebra In Las Vegas.

I Can't Summon Anymore Gas!" Leo Warned. The His Faced Turned Red. 'wow, That Came Out Wrong. I Mean The Burning Kind.

Hope Survives Best At The Hearth.

Percy Jackson And The Olympians

They Had A Silent Staring Contest, But Percy Didn’t Back Down. When He And Annabeth Started Dating, His Mother Had Drummed It Into His Head: It’s Good Manners To Walk Your Date To The Door. If That Was True, It Had To Be Good Manners To Walk Her To The Start Of Her Epic Solo Death Quest.

Don't Get Starry-eyed About Somebody You Can't Have, Especially If It Blinds You To Somebody Who's Really Important.

The Truth Hit Him. Jason Wasn't Quite Roman Anymore. His Time At Camp Half-blood Had Changed Him. Reyna Had Recognized That. Apparently, So Did The Undead Legionnaires. If Jason No Longer Gave Off The Right Sort Of Vibe, Or Aura Of A Roman Leader.

The House Is In The House" Chapter 38

Oh, Lord. I Was Beginning To Think Like Neith. Soon I'd Be Huddled In An Underground Bunker Eating Army Rations And Cackling As I Sewed Together The Pockets Of All The Boys Who'd Jilted Me.

So Few People Did Good In Their Lives. It Was Depressing.

Schist," Said An Angry Voice From The Grass. Hazel Raised Her Eyebrows. "excuse Me?" "schist! Big Pile Of Schist!

Met Them. Killed Them. Got The T-shirt.

Whoa," Connor Stoll Said. "back Up. Zoom In Right There." "what?" Annabeth Said Nervously. "you See Invaders?" "no, Right There—dylan's Candy Bar." Connor Grinned At His Brother. "dude, It's Open. And Everyone Is Asleep. Are You Thinking What I'm Thinking?" "connor!" Katie Gardner Scolded. She Sounded Like Her Mother, Demeter. "this Is Serious. You Are Not Going To Loot A Candy Store In The Middle Of A War!" "sorry," Connor Muttered, But He Didn't Sound Very Ashamed.

Bes Had Indeed Put On His Ugly Outfit. He Climbed Onto The Roof Of The Limbo And Stood There, Legs Planted, Arms Akimbo, Like Superman-exept With Only The Underwear. I Wasn't Sure What To Say Except: "put Some Clothes On!" "these Children Are Under My Protection," Bes Insisted. "i Don't Know You," I Said, "i Never Met You Before Today." "nonsense. You Expressly Asked For My Attention." "i Didn't Ask For The Speedo Patrol!

Wisdom's Daughter Walks Alone. That Didn't Just Mean Without Other People, Annabeth Realized. It Meant Without Any Special Powers.

Nothing Like Adhd And A Good Fight To The Death To Make Time Fly

Oh, I Wouldn't Say Love Always Makes You Happy. Sometimes It Makes You Incredibly Sad.

She Sacrificed Her Life To Make Things Right," Mitchell Grumbled. "she[silena Beuregard] Was A Hero

Make Things Right

Hermes's Shoulders Sagged. "they'll Try, Percy. Oh, We'll All Try To Keep Our Promise. And Maybe For A While Things Will Get Better. But We Gods Have Never Been Good At Keeping Oaths. You Were Born Because Of A Broken Promise, Eh? Eventually We'll Become Forgetful. We Always Do." "you Can Change." Hermes Laughed. "after Three Thousand Years, You Think The Gods Can Change Their Nature?" "yeah," I Said. "i Do.

For An Absurd Moment, I Wondered If Ammit Devoured The Hearts Of Wicked Cows, And If He Liked The Beefy Taste. - Carter Kane

Life Is Only Precious Because It Ends, Kid. Take It From A God. You Mortals Don't Know How Lucky You Are

Maybe Love Was No Match For Ice...but Piper Had Used It To Wake A Metal Dragon. Mortals Did Superhuman Feats In The Name Of Love All The Time. Mothers Lifted Cars To Save Their Children. And Piper Was More Than Just A Mortal. She Was A Demigod. A Hero. The Ice Melted On Her Blade. Her Arm Steamed Under Khione's Grip. 'still Underestimating Me,' Piper Told The Goddess. 'you Really Need To Work On That.

About The Prophecy That Rachel Did At The End Of "the Last Olympian," Percy Jackson Will Participate This Prophecy, Along With Annabeth? Sorry For Spelling Errors

That's Me. Ancient History." [poseidon To Paul]

Ancient History

Everyone Thinks You've Been Kidnapped," He Said. "we've Been Scouring The Ship. When Coach Hedge Finds Out- Oh, Gods, You've Been Here All Night?" "frank!" Annabeth's Ears Were As Red As Strawberries. "we Just Came Down Here To Talk. We Fell Asleep. Accidentally. That's It." "kissed A Couple Of Times," Percy Said. Annabeth Glared At Him. "not Helping!

He Raised An Eyebrow. "you Claim Not To Know Me? Of Course I'm Thoth. Also Called Djehuti. Also Called--" I [sadie] Stifled A Laugh. "ja-hooty?" Thoth Looked Offended. "in Ancient Egyptian, It's A Perfectly Fine Name. The Greeks Called Me Thoth. Then Later They Confused Me With Their God Hermes. Even Had The Nerve To Rename My Sacred City Hermopolis, Though We're Nothing Alike. Believe Me, If You've Ever Met Hermes--

There's No Point In Defending Camp If You Guys Die. All Our Friends Are Here.

Whenever Percy Stopped By To See [annabeth], She Was So Lost In Thought That The Conversation Went Something Like This: Percy: 'hey, How's It Going?' Annabeth: 'uh, No Thanks.' Percy: 'okay...have You Eaten Anything Today?' Annabeth: 'i Think Leo Is On Duty. Ask Him.' Percy: 'so, My Hair Is On Fire.' Annabeth: 'okay, In A While.

I Guessed His Name Was Face Of Horror. I Wondered How Long It Had Taken His Mom To Think Of That. Bob? No. Sam? No. How About Face Of Horror?

Aphros Nodded, A Glint Of Pride In His Eyes. “we Have Trained All The Famous Mer-heroes! Name A Famous Mer-hero, And We Have Trained Him Or Her!” “oh, Sure,” Leo Said. “like…um, The Little Mermaid?” Aphros Frowned. “who? No! Like Triton, Glaucus, Weissmuller, And Bill!” “oh. ”leo Had No Idea Who Any Of Those People Were. “you Trained Bill? Impressive.

But How Did You Know Where We Were?" Annabeth Asked. Advanced Planning, My Dear. I Figured You Would Wash Up Near Miami If You Made It Out Of The Sea Of Monsters Alive. Almost Everything Strange Washes Up Near Miami.

Grand Buildings Made Her Feel Better--maybe Because Being In A Place So Permanent Made Her Feel More Permanent.

Annabeth Sat Up And Glared At Her Ankle. "you Had To Break," She Scolded It. The Ankle Did Not Reply.

If You've Seen A Crab's Mouth, All Foamy And Gross With Whiskers And Snapping Bits, You Can Imagine This One Didn't Look Any Better Blown Up To Billboard Size.

Thoth's Beak! You Are Impossibley Stubborn." "yeah, It's A Gift.

A Guy In Greek Armor Drew His Sword And Charged, But Slipped In A Puddle Of Pina Colada.

She Wanted Me To Betray You Guys, And I Was Like, 'pfft, Right, I'm Gonna Listen To A Face In The Potty Sludge'.

Hermes Has Threatened Me With Slow Mail. Lousy Internet Service And A Horrible Stock Market If I Publish This Story. I Hope He Is Just Bluffing.

Great, I Thought. We Just Blowtorched A National Monument.

Right Before The Game, She Strolled Up To Me. "hey, Seaweed Brain." "will You Stop Calling Me That?" She Knows I Hate That Name, Mostly Because I Never Have A Good Comeback. She's The Daughter Of Athena, Which Doesn't Give Me A Lot Of Ammunition. I Mean, "owl-head" And "wise Girl" Are Kind Of Lame Insults.

The Afterlife Looks Different To Every Soul," He Said, "depending On Whatthey Believe. For That Guy, Egypt Must've Made A Strong Impression When He Was Young , Maybe." "and If Someone Doesn't Believe In Any Afterlife?" I Asked. Walt Gave Me A Sad Look. "then That's What They Experience.

Bast Crouched Down And Began Making Weird Chittering Noises. Uh-oh. She Was Imitating Birds. I'd Seen Enough Cats Do This When They Were Stalking. Suddenly My Own Obituary Flashed In My Head: Carter Kane, 14, Tragically Died In Paris Wen He Was Eaten By His Sister's Cat, Muffin.

She Decided She'd Rather Die In Some Less Memorable Way- Maybe Falling Down The Stairs, Or Going Peacefully In Her Sleep At The Age Eighty, After A Nice Quiet Life With Percy.yes, That Sounded Good.

I Don't Feel That Way Anymore," Nico Muttered. "i Mean... I Gave Up On Percy. I Was Young And Impressionable, And I- I Don't..." His Voice Cracked, And Jason Could Tell The Guy Was About To Get Teary-eyed. Whether Nico Had Really Given Up On Percy Or Not, Jason Couldn't Imagine What It Had Been Like For Nico All Those Years, Keeping A Secret That Would've Been Unthinkable To Share In The 1940s, Denying Who He Was, Feeling Completely Alone- Even More Isolated Than Other Demigods. "nico," He Said Gently, "i've Seen A Lot Of Brave Things. But What You Did? That Was Maybe The Bravest.

Love Was The Most Savage Monster Of All.

The Romans Always Wanted Bread And Circuses-food And Entertainement! As We Destroy Their City, I Will Offer Them Both. Behold, A Sample!" Someething Dropped From The Ceiling And Landed At Percy's Feet: A Loaf Of Sandwich Bread In A White Plastic Wrapper With Red And Yellow Dots. Percy Picked It Up. "wonder Bread?" "magnificent, Isn't It?" Ephialtes Eyes Danced With Crazy Excitement.

So, Destroy?" Cal Asked. Clearly, The Conversation Was Giving His Two Brain Cells A Serious Workout.

Yeah, Well,” Nico Said, “not Giving People A Second Thought…that Can Be Dangerous.

I Was Flying Right Toward Him (the Pig) At The Speed Of Demigod-smashing.

Some Pain Shouldn’t Be Wished Away So Easily. It Has To Be Dealt With, Even Embraced.

When He Woke, Daylight Was Coming Through The Glass Floor, And A Boy's Voice Said, "oh...you Are In So Much Trouble.

Leo Couldn't Help Smiling. "that Could Be Fun." "fun" She Said Unhappily. "blue Elephants." "blue Elephants." "kiss Me You Fool." "you Fool.

It's Not Easy. I Got Lots Of Rejections When I First Started Out. If You Want To Write, You Have To Believe In Yourself And Not Give Up. You Have To Do Your Best To Practice And Get Better.

Purple Light Passed Over The Paper, But Nothing Happened. "next!" Amy Said. She Was Sure The Man In Black Was Going To Burst In On Them Any Second. "whoa!" Dan Said. Amy Gripped His Arm. "you Found It?" "no, But Look! This Whole Essay - 'to The Royal Academy.' He Wrote A Whole Essay On Farts!" Dan Grinned With Delight. "he's Proposing A Scientific Study On Different Fart Smells. You're Right, Amy. This Guy Was A Genius!

It Isn’t Easy Being A Brilliant Inventor, Always Alone. Always Misunderstood. Easy To Turn Bitter, Make Horrible Mistakes. People Are More Difficult To Work With Than Machines. And When You Break A Person, He Can’t Be Fixed. -hephaestus

Thank Artemis, It Is You! That Little Scar On Your Lip--you Tried To Eat A Stapler When You Were Two!" ... Hedge Nodded Like He Approved Of Jason's Taste. "staplers--excellent Source Of Iron.

And Do You Know What A Full-fledged War Would Look Like, Percy?" "bad?" I Guessed. "imagine The World In Chaos. Nature At War With Itself. Olympians Forced To Choose Sides Between Zeus Amd Poseidon. Destruction. Carnage. Millions Dead. Western Civilization Turned Into A Battleground So Big It Will Make The Trojan War Look Like A Water-balloon Fight." "bad," I Repeated.

Very Well! It Shall Be As You Say. But My Son, Pray This Works. I Am Praying. I'm Talking To You, Right? Oh...yes. Good Point. Amphitrite - Incoming!

The Demigods Have Left For Alaska," Stheno Said. "they Fly Straight To Their Death. Ah, Small "d" Death, I Mean. Not Our Prisoner Death. Although, I Suppose They're Flying To Him Too.

We Did All The Standard Camp Numbers: "down By The Aegean," "i Am My Own Great-great-great-great Grandpa," "this Land Is Minos's Land.

Die Human, Die!! Die Nasty Polluting Person!!!!' Yelled Grover. I Turned Him So He Faced Me. He Kept On Clicking His Plastic Gun Towards Me As If I Was Part Of The Game.

Do Yourself A Favor,' I Said. "forget It. Forget You Ever Saw Me." "forget That You Tried To Kill Me Too?" "yeah. That, Too." "but Who Are You?" "percy-" I Started To Say. Then The Skeletons Turned Around. "gotta Go!" "what Kind Of Name Is Percy Gotta-go?" I Bolted For The Exit.

Everybody Was Patting Nico On The Back, Complimenting Him On His Fighting. Even The Ares Kids Thought He Was Pretty Cool. Hey, Show Up With An Army Of Undead Warriors To Save The Day, And Suddenly You're Everybody's Best Friend.

Why Can't You Place A Blessing Like That On Us?" I Asked. "it Only Works On Wild Animals." "so It Would Only Affect Percy," Annabeth Reasoned. "hey!" I Protested.

If I've Got The Powers Of A God, Then Why Am I So..." "lame?" Sadie Suggested. "shut Up," I Said.

Juno: "the Heroes Of Olympus Must Unite! After Your Victory Over Kronos In Manhattan...well I Fear That Wounded Jupiter's Self-esteem." Percy: Cause I Was Right And He Was Wrong" Juno: "he Should Be Used To That After Being Married To Me So Long, But Alas.

You'd Think Getting Chopped Into A Million Pieces And Cast Into The Darkest Part Of The Underworld Would Give Him A Subtle Clue That Nobody Wanted Him Around.

I Seriously Needed An Extra-strength Magic Pillow, Because My Ba Refused To Stay Put. [and No, Sadie, I Don't Think Wrapping My Head In Duct Tape Would've Worked Either.]

Before I Could Figure Out How To Apologize For Being Such An Idiot, She Tackled Me With A Hug, Then Pulled Away Just As Quickly. "i'm Glad You're Not A Guinea Pig." "me, Too." I Hoped My Face Wasn't As Red As It Felt.

You're Pretty Smug, Lord Ares, For A Guy Who Runs From Cupid Statues.

Mrs. O' Leary Is My Pet. I Couldn't Let You Stick A Sword In Her Rump, Now, Could I? That Might've Scared Her.

I Woke To A Bucket Of Ice Water In My Face. “sadie! Get Up,” Zia Said. “god!” I Yelled. “was That Necessary?” “no,” Admitted Zia.

She Stared At Me. "fly, ;ole, In An Airplane, Which You Were Warned Never To Do Lest Zeus Strike You Out Of The Sky, And Carrying A Weapon That Has More Destructive Power Than A Nuclear Bomb?" "yeah," I Said. "pretty Much Exactly Like That.

Leo Waited While The Fish Centaur Put Away His Supplies. Aphros's Lobster-claw Horns Kept Swimming Around In His Thick Hair, And Leo Had To Resist The Urge To Try And Rescue Them.

Go Chase A Donut. -percy Jackson.

Powdered Donuts," Tyson Said Earnestly. "i Will Look For Powdered Donuts In The Wilderness." He Headed Outside And Started Calling, "here, Donuts!

Chaos Is Impatient. It's Random. And Above All It's Selfish. It Tears Down Everything Just For The Sake Of Change, Feeding On Itself In Constant Hunger. But Chaos Can Also Be Appealing. It Tempts You To Believe That Nothing Matters Except What You Want.

But How Did You Know Where We Were?" Annabeth Asked. Advanced Planning, My Dear. I Figured You Would Wash Up Near Miami If You Made It Out Of The Sea Of Monsters Alive. Almost Everything Strange Washes Up Near Miami.

During Their Separation, Something Had Happened To Annabeth's Feelings. They'd Grown Painfully Intense-like She'd Been Forced To Withdraw From A Life-saving Medication. Now She Wasn't Sure Which Was More Excruciating-living With That Horrible Absence, Or Being With Him Again.

Percy Looked At His Friends. “i’m Getting Tired Of This Guy’s Shirt.

"monkey Bars," Annabeth Said. "i'm Great At These." She Leaped Onto To The First Rung And Started Swinging Her Way Across. She Was Scared Of Tiny Spiders, But Not Of Plummeting To Her Death From A Set Of Monkey Bars. Go Figure.

Something Inside Me Clicked, Like An Engine Shifting Into Higher Gear. My Thinking Suddenly Became Faster And Clearer. The Anger And Fear Didn't Go Away, But I Realized They Weren't Important. They Weren't Going To Help Me.

Looking Up In The Sky, I Saw The Stars Were Brighter Now. They Made A Pattern I Had Never Noticed Before- A Gleaming Constellation That Looked A Lot Like A Girls Figure- A Girl With A Bow, Running Across The Sky. "let The World Honor You, My Huntress. Live Forever In The Stars.

Evil Is Easy To Fight. Lack Of Wisdom...that Is Very Hard Indeed.

If You'd Sat There Any Longer,' Annabeth Said, 'you Would Have Spontaneously Combusted. I Hope The Conversation Was Worth It?

Otis Barreled Towards Them Empty-handed, Before Apparently Realizing That A) He Was Empty-handed And B) Charging Towards A Large Body Of Water To Fight A Son Of Poseidon Was Maybe Not A Good Idea.

Percy, Lesser Beings Do Many Horrible Things In The Name Of The Gods. That Does Not Mean We Gods Approve. The Way Our Sons And Daughters Act In Our Names... Well, It Usually Says More About Them Than It Does About Us.

I Told Tantalus To Go Chase A Doughnut.

I Tried To Smile Like I Wasn't About To Die.

I’ll Distract Them,” Carter Said. “you Search. The Trophy Room Is Through There.” “carter!” But The Fool Ran Off To Protect Me. I Hate When He Does That.

I Couldn't Believe I'd Come This Far, Lost Tyson, Suffered Through So Much, Only To Fail - Stopped By A Big Stupid Monster In A Baby-blue Tuxedo Kilt. Nobody Was Going To Swat Down My Friends Like That! I Mean... Nobody, Not Nobody. Ah, You Know What I Mean.

Jeez, Hazel," Percy Said, "tell Your Horse To Watch His Language." Hazel Tried Not To Laugh. "what Did He Say?" "with The Cussing Removed? He Said He Can Get Us To The Top." Frank Looked Incredulous. "i Thought The Horse Couldn't Fly!" This Time Arion Whinnied So Angrily, Even Hazel Could Guess He Was Cursing. "dude," Percy Told The Horse, "i've Gotten Suspended For Saying Less Than That.

If I'm Going To Survive, It Won't Be Because I Have A Lion-skin Cloak. I'm Not Hercules.

We Swallowed A Few Bites-not To Much Scince The Food Of The Gods Can Burn You To Ashes Is You Overindulge. I Guess Thats Why You Don't See Many Fat Gods

Cacus.” I’d Had Years Of Practice Looking Dumb When People Threw Out Greek Names I Didn’t Know. It’s A Skill Of Mine. Annabeth Keeps Telling Me To Read A Book Of Greek Myths, But I Don’t See The Need. It’s Easier Just To Have Folks Explain Stuff.

Hey, Moose!” I Screamed. The Set Animal Locked Its Glowing Eyes One Me. Well Done! Horus Said. Now We’ll Both Die With Honor! Shut Up, I Thought.

He Dropped The Rest Of The Cokes Into The Grave And Pulled Out A White Paper Bag Decorated With Cartoons. I Hadn’t Seen One In Years, But I Recognized It — A Mcdonald’s Happy Meal. He Turned It Upside Down And Shook The Fries And Hamburger Into The Grave. “in My Day, We Used Animal Blood,” The Ghost Mumbled. “it’s Perfectly Good Enough. They Can’t Taste The Difference.” “i Will Treat Them With Respect,” Nico Said. “at Least Let Me Keep The Toy,” The Ghost Said.

To All My Librarian Friends, Champions Of Books, True Magicians In The House Of Life. Without You, This Writer Would Be Lost In The Dust.

A Battle Can Be Won Before It's Ever Fought By Choosing The Right Ground.

The Last Thing I Wanted To Do Was Blow Up Another School.

The Sign Read Mouse Pass Gas Frank: "that's Wrong

"you Are Okay?" He Asked. "not Eaten By Monsters?" "not Even A Little Bit." I Showed Him That I Still Had Both Arms And Both Legs, And Tyson Clapped Happily. "yay!" He Said. "now We Can Eat Peanut Butter Sandwiches And Ride Fish Ponies! We Can Fight Monsters And See Annabeth And Make Things Go Boom!" I Hoped He Didn't Mean All At The Same Time, But I Told Him Absolutely, We'd Have A Lot Of Fun This Summer.

Writing Is Like A Sport. If You Don't Practice, You Don't Get Any Better.

Together We Made Our Way Down To The Street Level. Neither Of Us Said A Word. The Music Was Awful--neil Diamond Or Something. I Should've Made That Part Of My Gift Form The Gods: Better Elevator Tunes.

Look," Percy Continued, "i Know I'm New Here. I Know You Guys Don't Like To Mention The Massacre In The Nineteen Eighties-" "he Mentioned It!" One Of The Ghosts Whimpered.

You're Alive!" Percy Said To The Others. "the Giants Said You Were Captured. What Happened?" Leo Shrugged. "oh, Just Another Brilliant Plan By Leo Valdez. You'd Be Amazed What You Can Do With An Archimedes Sphere, A Girl Who Can Sense Stuff Underground, And A Weasel." "i Was The Weasel," Frank Said Glumly.

The Horse Seemed To Bend Time And Space As He Ran, Blurring The Landscape And Making Frank Feel Like He'd Just Drunk A Gallon Of Whole Milk Without His Lactose-intolerance Medicine: "seven Hundred And Fifty Miles Per Hour. Eight Hundred. Eight Hundred And Three. Fast. Very Fast.

Fighting Giants Was One Thing. Bacchus Making Into A Game Was Something Else.

He Touched The Screen As If Trying To Reach Through With His Hand. "you're A Wonderful Young Lady. I Don't Tell You That Often Enough. You Remind Me So Much Of Your Mother. She'd Be Proud. And Grandpa Tom" --he Chuckled-- "he Always Said You'd Be The Most Powerful Voice In Our Family. You're Going To Outshine Me Some Day, You Know. They're Going To Remember Me As Piper Mclean's Father, And That's The Best Legacy I Can Imagine.

In Case You're Wondering, The Underside Of A Sheep Doesn't Smell That Great. Imagine A Winter Sweater That's Been Dragged Through The Mud And Left In The Laundry Hamper For A Week. Something Like That.

His Lion And Hippo Legs Twitched. I Wondered If Netherworld Monsters Dreamed Of Chasing Rabbits.

Knowledge Isn't Always Good For You.

Do Not Despair. Heroes Rarely Live Up To To Our Expectations

I Love Norse Mythology - Thor And Odin And Loki - Amazing Characters.

I Was Five Steps Away When He Called, "perseus." I Turned. There Was A Different Light In His Eyes, A Fiery Kind Of Pride. "you Did Well, Perseus. Do Not Misunderstand Me. Whatever Else You Do, Know That You Are Mine. You Are A True Son Of The Sea God.

You Can Do This" I Murmured. "you Are My Brother. I Love You. All The Embarrassing Bits, All The Annoying Bits, Which I Imagine Is Most Of You--a Thousand Zias Might Run Away From You If They Knew The Truth. But I Won't. I'll Still Be Here.

No Matter How Many Times Percy Killed Them And Watched Them Crumble To Powder, They Just Kept Re-forming Like Large Evil Dust Bunnies.

Thalia Blushed. "hi, Lord Apollo." Zeus's Girl, Yes? Makes You My Half Sister. Used To Be A Tree, Didn't You? Glad You're Back. I Hate It When Pretty Girls Turn Into Trees. Man, I Remember One Time—

Your Lifeline...oh, The Burning Stick. Right." Leo Resisted The Urge To Set His Hand Ablaze And Yell: Bwah Ha Ha!

You Assume That It Has To Be A Male God Who Finds A Human Female Attractive? How Sexist Is That?

Percy Smiled At Her - That Sarcastic Troublemaker Smile That Had Annoyed Her For Years But Eventually Had Become Endearing. His Sea-green Eyes Were As Gorgeous As She Remembered. His Dark Hair Was Swept To One Side, Like He'd Just Come From A Walk On The Beach. He Looked Even Better Than He Had Six Months Ago - Tanner And Taller, Leaner And More Muscular. Percy Threw His Arms Around Her. They Kissed And For A Moment Nothing Else Mattered. An Asteroid Could Have Hit The Planet And Wiped Out All Life, And Annabeth Wouldn't Have Cared.

Reyna Sent Me To Get Percy," Frank Said. "did Octavian Accept You?" "yeah," Percy Said. "he Slaughtered My Panda.

I Started To Walk Away, But She [clarisse] Called Out, "percy?" "yeah?" "when You, Uh, Had That Vision About Your Friends..." "you Were One Of Them," I Promised, "just Don't Tell Anybody, Okay? Or I'de Have To Kill You." A Faint Smile Flickered Across Her Face "see You Later." "see You

A Vampire!" I Stammered. Then I Noticed Her Legs. Below The Cheerleader Skirt, Her Left Leg Was Brown And Shaggy With A Donkey's Hoof. Her Right Leg Was Shaped Like A Human Leg Was It Was Made Of Bronze. "uhh, A Vampire With-" "don't Mention The Legs!" Tammi Snapped. "it's Rude To Make Fun.

I Will Deny I Ever Said This, Of Course, But The Gods Need Heroes. They Always Have. Otherwise We Would Not Keep You Annoying Little Brats Around." I Feel So Wanted. Thanks.

Back When I Taught Middle School And Wrote Adult Mysteries, My Students Often Asked Me Why I Wasn't Writing For Kids. I Never Had A Good Answer For Them. It Took Me A Long Time To Realize They Were Right.

She Pulled Away. “i Missed You, Percy.” Percy Wanted To Tell Her The Same Thing, But It Seemed Too Small A Comment. While He Had Been On The Roman Side, He’d Kept Himself Alive Almost Solely By Thinking Of Annabeth. I Missed You Didn’t Really Cover That.

He Was Dressed Just Like On Tv, With Lots Of Silver Chains And Bracelets, Ripped Jeans, And A Black Muscle Shirt (which Was Kind Of Stupid, Since He Didn't Have Any Muscles).

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