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This Piece Of Rudeness Was More Than Alice Could Bear: She Got Up In Great Disgust, And Walked Off; The Dormouse Fell Asleep Instantly, And Neither Of The Others Took The Least Notice Of Her Going, Though She Looked Back Once Or Twice, Half Hoping That They Would Call After Her: The Last Time She Saw Them, They Were Trying To Put The Dormouse Into The Teapot. At Any Rate I'll Never Go There Again!' Said Alice As She Picked Her Way Through The Wood. "it's The Stupidest Tea-party I Ever Was At In All My Life!

-Lewis Carroll

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This Piece Of Rudeness

Lewis Carroll

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This Piece Of Rudeness Was More Than Alice Could Bear: She Got Up In Great Disgust, And Walked Off; The Dormouse Fell Asleep Instantly, And Neither Of The Others Took The Least Notice Of Her Going, Though She Looked Back Once Or Twice, Half Hoping That They Would Call After Her: The Last Time She Saw Them, They Were Trying To Put The Dormouse Into The Teapot. At Any Rate I'll Never Go There Again!' Said Alice As She Picked Her Way Through The Wood. "it's The Stupidest Tea-party I Ever Was At In All My Life!

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Epithets, Like Pepper, Give Zest To What You Write; And If You Strew Them Sparely, They Whet The Appetite: But If You Lay Them On Too Thick, You Spoil The Matter Quite!

Would You Be A Poet Before You've Been To School? Ah, Well! I Hardly Thought You So Absolute A Fool.

I Don't See How He Can Ever Finish, If He Doesn't Begin.

Sentence First, Verdict Afterwards.

You Used To Be Much More..."muchier." You've Lost Your Muchness.

'and How, Who Am I? I Will Remember, If I Can! I'm Determined To Do It!' But Being Determined Didn't Help Much.

Come, My Child," I Said, Trying To Lead Her Away. "wish Good-bye To The Poor Hare, And Come And Look For Blackberries." "good-bye, Poor Hare!" Sylvie Obediently Repeated, Looking Over Her Shoulder At It As We Turned Away. And Then, All In A Moment, Her Self-command Gave Way. Pulling Her Hand Out Of Mine, She Ran Back To Where The Dead Hare Was Lying, And Flung Herself Down At Its Side In Such An Agony Of Grief As I Could Hardly Have Believed Possible In So Young A Child. "oh, My Darling, My Darling!" She Moaned, Over And Over Again. "and God Meant Your Life To Be So Beautiful!

Be Sure The Safest Rule Is That We Should Not Dare To Live In Any Scene In Which We Dare Not Die. But, Once Realise What The True Object Is In Life That It Is Not Pleasure, Not Knowledge, Not Even Fame Itself, 'that Last Infirmity Of Noble Minds' But That It Is The Development Of Character, The Rising To A Higher, Nobler, Purer Standard, The Building-up Of The Perfect Man And Then, So Long As We Feel That This Is Going On, And Will (we Trust) Go On For Evermore, Death Has For Us No Terror; It Is Not A Shadow, But A Light; Not An End, But A Beginning!

Speak In French When You Can't Think Of The English For A Thing. Turn Out Your Toes As You Walk. And Remember Who You Are!

Remember Who You Are

Will You Walk A Little Faster? Said A Whiting To A Snail, "there's A Porpoise Close Behind Us, And He's Treading On My Tail! See How Eagerly The Lobsters And The Turtles All Advance: They Are Waiting On The Shingle--will You Come And Join The Dance?

Alice Had Begun With 'let's Pretend We're Kings And Queens;' And Her Sister, Who Liked Being Exact, Had Argued That They Couldn't, Because There Were Only Two Of Them, And Alice Hand Been Reduced At Last To Say, 'well, You Can Be One Of Them Then, And I'll Be The Rest.

The Master Was An Old Turtle--we Used To Call Him Tortoise--' Why Did You Call Him Tortoise, If He Wasn't One?' Alice Asked. We Called Him Tortoise Because He Taught Us,' Said The Mock Turtle Angrily; 'really You Are Very Dull!' You Ought To Be Ashamed Of Yourself For Asking Such A Simple Question,' Added The Gryphon; And Then They Both Sat Silent And Looked At Poor Alice, Who Felt Ready To Sink Into The Earth.

It's Jam Every Other Day: To-day Isn't Any Other Day, You Know.

Through The Looking Glass

Life, What Is It But A Dream?

You Know," He (tweedledee) Added Very Gravely, "it's One Of The Most Serious Things That Can Possibly Happen To One In A Battle--to Get One's Head Cut Off." Pg. 199

For The Snark Was A Boojum, You See.

Lastly, She Pictured To Herself How This Same Little Sister Of Hers Would, In The After-time, Be Herself A Grown Woman; And How She Would Keep, Through All Her Riper Years, The Simple And Loving Heart Of Her Childhood: And How She Would Gather About Her Other Little Children, And Make Their Eyes Bright And Eager With Many A Strange Tale, Perhaps Even With The Dream Of Wonderland Of Long Ago: And How She Would Feel With All Their Simple Sorrows, And Find A Pleasure In All Their Simple Joys, Remembering Her Own Child-life, And The Happy Summer Days.

Why, What A Temper You Are In!

You May Charge Me With Murder--or Want Of Sense-- (we Are All Of Us Weak At Times): But The Slightest Approach To A False Pretence Was Never Among My Crimes!

Well, When One's Lost, I Suppose It's Good Advice To Stay Where You Are Until Someone Finds You.

I Have Proved By Actual Trial That A Letter, That Takes An Hour To Write, Takes Only About 3 Minutes To Read!

We Haven't Any And You're Too Young.

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"write That Down," The King Said To The Jury, And The Jury Eagerly Wrote Down All Three Dates On Their Slates, And Then Added Them Up, And Reduced The Answer To Shillings And Pence.

He Said He Would Come In,' The White Queen Went On, `because He Was Looking For A Hippopotamus. Now, As It Happened, There Wasn't Such A Thing In The House, That Morning.' Is There Generally?' Alice Asked In An Astonished Tone. Well, Only On Thursdays,' Said The Queen.

No, No! The Adventures First, Explanations Take Such A Dreadful Time.

Adventurous Life

What Does It Matter Where My Body Happens To Be?' He Said. 'my Mind Goes On Working All The Same.

It's Always Tea-time.

That Which Chiefly Causes The Failure Of A Dinner-party, Is The Running Short--not Of Meat, Nor Yet Of Drink, But Of Conversation.

She's Stark Raving Mad!

She Tried To Fancy What The Flame Of A Candle Is Like After The Candle Is Blown Out, For She Could Not Remember Ever Having Seen Such A Thing.

She Who Saves A Single Soul, Saves The Universe.

So Young A Child Ought To Know Which Way She's Going, Even If She Doesn't Know Her Own Name!

Of All Things, I Do Like A Conspiracy! It's So Interesting!

To The Looking-glass World It Was Alice That Said 'i've A Sceptre In Hand, I've A Crown On My Head. Let The Looking-glass Creatures, Whatever They Be, Come And Dine With The Red Queen, The White Queen, And Me.

Who In The World Am I? Ah, That's The Great Puzzle.

Oh, 'tis Love, 'tis Love That Makes The World Go Round.

And How Many Hours A Day Did You Do Lessons?' Said Alice, In A Hurry To Change The Subject. Ten Hours The First Day,' Said The Mock Turtle: 'nine The Next, And So On.' What A Curious Plan!' Exclaimed Alice. That's The Reason They're Called Lessons,' The Gryphon Remarked: 'because They Lessen From Day To Day.

"the Horror Of That Moment," The King Went On, "i Shall Never, Never Forget!" "you Will, Though," The Queen Said, "if You Don't Make A Memorandum Of It."

If I Had A World Of My Own, Everything Would Be Nonsense. Nothing Would Be What It Is, Because Everything Would Be What It Isn't. And Contrariwise, What It Is, It Wouldn't Be. And What It Wouldn't Be It Would. You See?

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Humpty Dumpty Sat On The Wall Humpty Dumpty Had A Great Fall All The King's Horses And All The King's Men Couldn't Put Humpty Together Again

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When I Come Upon Anything-in Logic Or In Any Other Hard Subject-that Entirely Puzzles Me, I Find It A Capital Plan To Talk It Over, Aloud, Even When I Am All Alone. One Can Explain Things So Clearly To One's Self! And Then, You Know, One Is So Patient With One's Self: One Never Gets Irritated At One's Own Stupidity!

Burning With Curiosity

My Hand Moves Because Certain Forces--electric, Magnetic, Or Whatever 'nerve-force' May Prove To Be--are Impressed On It By My Brain. This Nerve-force, Stored In The Brain, Would Probably Be Traceable, If Science Were Complete, To Chemical Forces Supplied To The Brain By The Blood, And Ultimately Derived From The Food I Eat And The Air I Breathe.

There's Nothing A Well-regulated Child Hates So Much As Regularity. I Believe A Really Healthy Boy Would Thoroughly Enjoy Greek Grammar--if Only He Might Stand On His Head To Learn It!

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Abstract Qualities Begin With Capitals Alway: The True, The Good, The Beautiful- Those Are The Things That Pay!

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In Proceeding To The Dining-room, The Gentleman Gives One Arm To The Lady He Escorts--it Is Unusual To Offer Both.

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The Good And Great Must Ever Shun That Reckless And Abandoned One Who Stoops To Perpetrate A Pun.

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My View Of Life Is, That It's Next To Impossible To Convince Anybody Of Anything.

It Is A Very Inconvenient Habit Of Kittens (alice Had Once Made The Remark) That Whatever You Say To Them, They Always Purr.

“i Don't Like The Look Of It At All,” Said The King: “however, It May Kiss My Hand, If It Likes.” “i'd Rather Not,” The Cat Remarked.

"i See Nobody On The Road," Said Alice. "i Only Wish I Had Such Eyes," The King Remarked In A Fretful Tone. "to Be Able To See Nobody! And At That Distance Too! Why, It's As Much As I Can Do To See Real People, By This Light."

The Cheshire Cat Only Grinned When It Saw Alice. It Looked Good-natured, She Thought: Still It Had Very Long Claws And A Great Many Teeth, So She Felt It Ought To Be Treated With Respect.

Fading, With The Night, The Memory Of A Dead Love, And The Withered Leaves Of A Blighted Hope, And The Sickly Repinings And Moody Regrets That Numb The Best Energies Of The Soul: And Rising, Broadening, Rolling Upward Like A Living Flood, The Manly Resolve, And The Dauntless Will, And The Heavenward Gaze Of Faith-the Substance Of Things Hoped For, The Evidence Of Things Not Seen!

Do You Know, I Always Thought Unicorns Were Fabulous Monsters, Too? I Never Saw One Alive Before!" Well, Now That We Have Seen Each Other," Said The Unicorn, "if You'll Believe In Me, I'll Believe In You.

I Wonder If I've Been Changed In The Night. Let Me Think. Was I The Same When I Got Up This Morning? I Almost Think I Can Remember Feeling A Little Different. But If I'm Not The Same, The Next Question Is 'who In The World Am I?' Ah, That's The Great Puzzle!

"i Could Have Done It In A Much More Complicated Way," Said The Red Queen, Immensely Proud.

I'm Getting Rather Hoarse, I Fear, After So Much Reciting: So, If You Don't Object, My Dear, We'll Try A Glass Of Bitter Beer - I Think It Looks Inviting.

"well, I Never Heard It Before," Said The Mock Turtle; "but It Sounds Uncommon Nonsense."

Now, Here, You See, It Takes All The Running You Can Do, To Keep In The Same Place. If You Want To Get Somewhere Else, You Must Run At Least Twice As Fast As That!

That's The Reason They're Called Lessons, Because They Lesson From Day To Day.

So She Sat On With Closed Eyes, And Half Believed Herself In Wonderland, Though She Knew She Had But To Open Them Again, And All Would Change To Dull Reality.

But Then, Shall I Never Get Any Older Than I Am Now? That'll Be A Comfort, One Way -- Never To Be An Old Woman -- But Then -- Always To Have Lessons To Learn!

"all Right", Said The Cat; And This Time It Vanished Quite Slowly, Beginning With The End Of The Tail, And Ending With The Grin, Which Remained Some Time After The Rest Of It Had Gone.

Be Sure The Safest Rule Is That We Should Not Dare To Live In Any Scene In Which We Dare Not Die.

Who Sail On Stormy Seas; And That's The Way I Get My Bread -- A Trifle, If You Please.

Come, Hearken Then, Ere Voice Of Dread, With Bitter Tiding Laden, Shall Summon To Unwelcome Bed A Melancholy Maiden! We Are But Older Children, Dear, Who Fret To Find Our Bedtime Near.

I'll Try If I Know All The Things I Used To Know. Let Me See: Four Times Five Is Twelve, And Four Times Six Is Thirteen, And Four Times Seven Is - Oh Dear! I Shall Never Get To Twenty At That Rate!

His Answer Trickled Through My Head Like Water Through A Sieve.

Fury Said To A Mousethat He Met In The Houselet Us Both Go To Law; I Will Prosecute Youlet There Be No Denial; Come, We Must Have A Trialfor Really, This Morning, I've Nothing To Dosuch A Trial, Dear Sir, Said The Mouse To The Curwithout Jury Or Judge Would Be Wasting Our Breathi'll Be Judge, I'll Be Jurysaid Cunning Old Furyi'll Try The Whole Cause And Condemn Youto Death

The Proper Definition Of A Man Is An Animal That Writes Letters.

Will You, Won't You, Will You, Won't You, Will You Join The Dance?

I Do Not Know If Alice In Wonderland Was An Original Story-i Was, At Least, No Conscious Imitator In Writing It-but I Do Know That, Since It Came Out, Something Like A Dozen Story-books Have Appeared, On Identically The Same Pattern. The Path I Timidly Explored Believing Myself To Be 'the First That Ever Burst Into That Silent Sea'-is Now A Beaten High-road: All The Way-side Flowers Have Long Ago Been Trampled Into The Dust: And It Would Be Courting Disaster For Me To Attempt That Style Again.

Still She Haunts Me, Phantomwise, Alice Moving Under Skies Never Seen By Waking Eyes.

"can You Do Addition?" The White Queen Said. "what's One And One And One And One And One And One And One And One And One And One?" "i Don't Know," Said Alice. "i Lost Count." "she Can't Do Addition," The Red Queen Interrupted.

Which Way You Ought To Go Depends On Where You Want To Get To.

There's No Use In Comparing One's Feelings Between One Day And The Next; You Must Allow A Reasonable Interval, For The Direction Of Change To Show Itself.

If You Set To Work To Believe Everything, You Will Tire Out The Believing-muscles Of Your Mind, And Then You'll Be So Weak You Won't Be Able To Believe The Simplest True Things.

There Is A Place. Like No Place On Earth. A Land Full Of Wonder, Mystery, And Danger! Some Say To Survive It: You Need To Be As Mad As A Hatter. Which Luckily I Am.

When All Has Been Considered, It Seems To Me To Be The Irresistible Intuition That Infinite Punishment For Finite Sin Would Be Unjust, And Therefore Wrong. We Feel That Even Weak And Erring Man Would Shrink From Such An Act. And We Cannot Conceive Of God As Acting On A Lower Standard Of Right And Wrong.

I Mean, What Is An Un-birthday Present?" A Present Given When It Isn't Your Birthday, Of Course." Alice Considered A Little. "i Like Birthday Presents Best," She Said At Last. You Don't Know What You're Talking About!" Cried Humpty Dumpty. "how Many Days Are There In A Year?" Three Hundred And Sixty-five," Said Alice. And How Many Birthdays Have You?" One.

What A Strange World We Live In...said Alice To The Queen Of Hearts

Forbid The Day When Vivisection Shall Be Practised In Every College And School, And When The Man Of Science, Looking Forth Over A World Which Will Then Own No Other Sway Than His, Shall Exult In The Thought That He Has Made Of This Fair Earth, If Not A Heaven, At Least A Hell For Animals.

All Too Soon Will Childhood Gay Realise Life's Sober Sadness. Let's Be Merry While We May, Innocent And Happy Fay! Elves Were Made For Gladness!

Crawling At Your Feet,' Said The Gnat (alice Drew Her Feet Back In Some Alarm), `you May Observe A Bread-and-butterfly. Its Wings Are Thin Slices Of Bread-and-butter, Its Body Is A Crust, And Its Head Is A Lump Of Sugar.' And What Does It Live On?' Weak Tea With Cream In It.' A New Difficulty Came Into Alice's Head. `supposing It Couldn't Find Any?' She Suggested. Then It Would Die, Of Course.' But That Must Happen Very Often,' Alice Remarked Thoughtfully. It Always Happens,' Said The Gnat.

I Cannot Even Pretend To Feel As Much Interest In Boys As In Girls.

In A Wonderland They Lie, Dreaming As The Days Go By, Dreaming As The Summers Die: Ever Drifting Down The Stream- Lingering In The Golden Gleam- Life, What Is It But A Dream?

How Puzzling All These Changes Are! I'm Never Sure What I'm Going To Be, From One Minute To Another.

It Would Be So Nice If Something Made Sense For A Change.

Mad Hatter: Would You Like A Little More Tea? Alice: Well, I Haven't Had Any Yet, So I Can't Very Well Take More. March Hare: Ah, You Mean You Can't Very Well Take Less. Mad Hatter: Yes. You Can Always Take More Than Nothing.

Courtesy Is A Small Act But It Packs A Mighty Wallop.

When You Are Describing, A Shape, Or Sound, Or Tint; Don't State The Matter Plainly, But Put It In A Hint; And Learn To Look At All Things, With A Sort Of Mental Squint.

The Queen Of Hearts, She Made Some Tarts, All On A Summer Day: The Knave Of Hearts, He Stole Those Tarts, And Took Them Quite Away!

If Everybody Minded Their Own Business... The World Would Go Round A Deal Faster Than It Does.

Can You Row?" The Sheep Asked, Handing Her A Pair Of Knitting-needles As She Spoke. "yes, A Little--but Not On Land--and Not With Needles--" Alice Was Beginning To Say.

No Discussion Between Two Persons Can Be Of Any Use, Until Each Knows Clearly What It Is That The Other Asserts.

A Thick Stick In One's Hand Makes People Respectful.

It'll Be No Use Their Putting Their Heads Down And Saying "come Up Again, Dear!" I Shall Only Look Up And Say "who Am I Then? Tell Me That First, And Then, If I Like Being That Person, I'll Come Up: If Not, I'll Stay Down Here Till I'm Somebody Else"--but, Oh Dear!' Cried Alice, With A Sudden Burst Of Tears, 'i Do Wish They Would Put Their Heads Down! I Am So Very Tired Of Being All Alone Here!

Alice Laughed. 'there's No Use Trying,' She Said. 'one Can't Believe Impossible Things.' I Daresay You Haven't Had Much Practice,' Said The Queen. 'when I Was Your Age, I Always Did It For Half-an-hour A Day. Why, Sometimes I've Believed As Many As Six Impossible Things Before Breakfast. There Goes The Shawl Again!

Yes, That's It! Said The Hatter With A Sigh, It's Always Tea Time.

Either It Brings Tears To Their Eyes, Or Else -" "or Else What?" Said Alice, For The Knight Had Made A Sudden Pause. "or Else It Doesn't, You Know.

Alice Was Beginning To Get Very Tired Of Sitting By Her Sister On The Bank, And Of Having Nothing To Do: Once Or Twice She Had Peeped Into The Book Her Sister Was Reading, But It Had No Pictures Or Conversations In It, “and What Is The Use Of A Book,” Thought Alice, “without Pictures Or Conversation?

Twenty Thousand Thieves Landed At Hastings. These Founders Of The House Of Lords Were Greedy And Ferocious Dragoons, Sons Of Greedy And Ferocious Pirates... Such, However, Is The Illusion Of Antiquity And Wealth, That Decent And Dignified Men Now Existing, Boast Their Descent From These Filthy Thieves, Who Showed A Far Juster Conviction Of Their Own Merits, By Assuming For Their Types The Swine, Goat, Jackal, Leopard, Wolf, And Snake, Which They Severally Resembled.

Take Care Of The Sense And The Sounds Will Take Care Of Themselves.

'always Speak The Truth - Think Before You Speak - And Write It Down Afterwards.' 'i'm Sure I Didn't Mean - ' Alice Was Beginning, But The Red Queen Interrupted Her Impatiently. 'that's Just What I Complain Of! You Should Have Meant! What Do You Suppose Is The Use Of Child Without Any Meaning? Even A Joke Should Have Some Meaning - And A Child's More Important Than A Joke, I Hope.

I Believe This Thought, Of The Possibility Of Death - If Calmly Realised, And Steadily Faced Would Be One Of The Best Possible Tests As To Our Going To Any Scene Of Amusement Being Right Or Wrong.

Twas Brillig, And The Slithy Toves Did Gyre And Gimble In The Wabe: All Mimsy Were The Borogoves, And The Mome Raths Outgrabe.

Through The Looking Glass

Curiouser And Curiouser.

I Never Thought Of That Before! It's My Opinion That You Never Think At All.

'speak When You're Spoken To!' The Queen Sharply Interrupted Her. 'but If Everybody Obeyed That Rule,' Said Alice, Who Was Always Ready For A Little Argument, 'and If You Only Spoke When You Were Spoken To, And The Other Person Always Waited For You To Begin, You See Nobody Would Ever Say Anything, So That - ' 'ridiculous!' Cried The Queen. 'why, Don't You See, Child - ' Here She Broke Off With A Frown, And, After Thinking For A Minute, Suddenly Changed The Subject Of The Conversation.

Thy Loving Smile Will Surely Hail The Love-gift Of A Fairy Tale.

There Comes A Pause, For Human Strength Will Not Endure To Dance Without Cessation; And Everyone Must Reach The Point At Length Of Absolute Prostration.

'i Beg Your Pardon?' Alice Said With A Puzzled Air. 'i'm Not Offended,' Said Humpty Dumpty.

When The Sands Are All Dry, He Is Gay As A Lark, And Will Talk In Contemptuous Tones Of The Shark: But, When The Tide Rises And Sharks Are Around, His Voice Has A Timid And Tremulous Sound.

If There's No Meaning In It," Said The King, "that Saves A World Of Trouble, You Know, As We Needn't Try To Find Any. And Yet I Don't Know," He Went On [...]; "i Seem To See Some Meaning In Them, After All.

Do You Suppose She's A Wildflower?

You Could Not See A Cloud, Because No Cloud Was In The Sky: No Birds Were Flying Overhead - There Were No Birds To Fly.

So She Was Considering In Her Own Mind...whether The Pleasure Of Making A Daisy-chain Would Be Worth The Trouble Of Getting Up & Picking The Daisies.

And How Do You Know That You're Mad?

Alice In Wonderland Alice

Take My Friends And My Home - As An Outcast I'll Roam: Take The Money I Have In The Bank: It Is Just What I Wish, But Deprive Me Of Fish, And My Life Would Indeed Be Blank.

I Maintain That Any Writer Of A Book Is Fully Authorised In Attaching Any Meaning He Likes To A Word Or Phrase He Intends To Use. If I Find An Author Saying, At The Beginning Of His Book, "let It Be Understood That By The Word 'black' I Shall Always Mean 'white,' And By The Word 'white' I Shall Always Mean 'black,'" I Meekly Accept His Ruling, However Injudicious I Think It.

I Confess I Do Not Admire Naked Boys. They Always Seem To Me To Need Clothes, Whereas One Hardly Sees Why The Lovely Forms Of Girls Should Ever Be Covered Up.

There Are Three Hundred And Sixty-four Days When You Might Get Un-birthday Presents, And Only One For Birthday Presents, You Know.

...those Serpents! There's No Pleasing Them!

Domestic Violence

But, Said Alice, The The World Has Absolutely No Sens, Who's Stopping Us From Inventing One?

I Don't Think..." Then You Shouldn't Talk, Said The Hatter.

There Are Certain Things--as, A Spider, A Ghost, The Income-tax, Gout, An Umbrella For Three-- That I Hate, But The Thing That I Hate The Most Is A Thing They Call The Sea.

And My Heart Is Like Nothing So Much As A Bowl Brimming Over With Quivering Curds!

Everything's Got A Moral, If Only You Can Find It.

It’s A Miserable Story!” Said Bruno. “it Begins Miserably, And It Ends Miserablier. I Think I Shall Cry. Sylvie, Please Lend Me Your Handkerchief.” “i Haven’t Got It With Me,” Sylvie Whispered. “then I Won’t Cry,” Said Bruno Manfully.

A Minute Goes By So Fearfully Quick. You Might As Well Try To Stop A Bandersnatch!

He Was Part Of My Dream, Of Course -- But Then I Was Part Of His Dream, Too.

Would You Tell Me, Please, Which Way I Ought To Go From Here?" "that Depends A Good Deal On Where You Want To Get To." "i Don't Much Care Where –" "then It Doesn't Matter Which Way You Go.

Alice Had Got So Much Into The Way Of Expecting Nothing But Out-of-the-way Things To Happen, That It Seemed Quite Dull And Stupid For Life To Go On In The Common Way.

When She Thought It Over Afterwards It Occurred To Her That She Ought To Have Wondered At This, But At The Time It All Seemed Quite Natural

Alice Adventures In Wonderland

Plain Superficiality Is The Character Of A Speech, In Which Any Two Points Being Taken, The Speaker Is Found To Lie Wholly With Regard To Those Two Points.

But Oh, Beamish Nephew, Beware Of The Day, If Your Snark Be A Boojum! For Then You Will Softly And Suddenly Vanish Away, And Never Be Met With Again!

I Don't Believe There's An Atom Of Meaning In It.

Alice Adventures In Wonderland

What Do You Suppose Is The Use Of A Child Without Any Meaning? Even A Joke Should Have Some Meaning-- And A Child's More Imporant Than A Joke, I Hope. You Couldn't Deny That, Even If You Tried With Both Hands.

No Good Fish Goes Anywhere Without A Porpoise.

Who Are You?" This Was Not An Encouraging Opening For A Conversation. Alice Replied, Rather Shyly, I--i Hardly Know, Sir, Just At Present-- At Least I Know Who I Was When I Got Up This Morning, But I Think I Must Have Been Changed Several Times Since Then.

Little Alice Fell D O W N The Hole, Bumped Her Head And Bruised Her Soul

O Oysters,' Said The Carpenter, You've Had A Pleasant Run! Shall We Be Trotting Home Again?' But Answer Came There None - And This Was Scarcely Odd, Because They'd Eaten Every One.

You Evidently Do Not Suffer From "quotation-hunger" As I Do! I Get All The Dictionaries Of Quotations I Can Meet With, As I Always Want To Know Where A Quotation Comes From.

If You Limit Your Actions In Life To Things That Nobody Can Possibly Find Fault With, You Will Not Do Much!

It Is Always Allowable To Ask For Artichoke Jelly With Your Boiled Venison; However There Are Houses Where This Is Not Supplied.

I Don't Want To Take Up Literature In A Money-making Spirit, Or Be Very Anxious About Making Large Profits, But Selling It At A Loss Is Another Thing Altogether, And An Amusement I Cannot Well Afford.

Child Of The Pure Unclouded Brow And Dreaming Eyes Of Wonder! Though Time Be Fleet, And I And Thou Are Half A Life Asunder, Thy Loving Smile Will Surely Hail The Love-gift Of A Fairy-tale.

One Thing Was Certain, That The White Kitten Had Had Nothing To Do With It-- It Was The Black Kitten's Fault Entirely.

Who Can Tell Whether The Parallelogram, Which In Our Ignorance We Have Defined And Drawn, And The Whole Of Whose Properties We Profess To Know, May Not Be All The While Panting For Exterior Angles, Sympathetic With The Interior, Or Sullenly Repining At The Fact That It Cannot Be Inscribed In A Circle?

Keep Your Temper, Said The Caterpillar.

'the Time Has Come,' The Walrus Said, 'to Talk Of Many Things: Of Shoes And Ships - And Sealing Wax - Of Cabbages And Kings.'

And If You Take One From Three Hundred And Sixty-five What Remains?" "three Hundred And Sixty-four, Of Course." Humpty Dumpty Looked Doubtful, "i'd Rather See That Done On Paper," He Said.

And Here Alice Began To Get Rather Sleepy, And Went On Saying To Herself, In A Dreamy Sort Of Way, 'do Cats Eat Bats? Do Cats Eat Bats?' And Sometimes, 'do Bats Eat Cats?' For, You See, As She Couldn't Answer Either Question, It Didn't Much Matter Which Way She Put It.

With A Sort Of Mental Squint.

What A Funny Watch!’ She Remarked. ‘it Tells The Day Of The Month, And Doesn’t Tell What O’clock It Is!’ ‘why Should It?’ Muttered The Hatter. ‘does Your Watch Tell You What Year It Is?’ ‘of Course Not,’ Alice Replied Very Readily: ‘but That’s Because It Stays The Same Year For Such A Long Time Together.’ ‘which Is Just The Case With Mine,’ Said The Hatter.

Alice Came To A Fork In The Road. 'which Road Do I Take?' She Asked. 'where Do You Want To Go?' Responded The Cheshire Cat. 'i Don't Know,' Alice Answered. 'then,' Said The Cat, 'it Doesn't Matter.

When I Used To Read Fairy-tales, I Fancied That Kind Of Thing Never Happened, And Now Here I Am In The Middle Of One!

Alice Thought To Herself, 'then There's No Use In Speaking.' The Voices Didn't Join In This Time, As She Hadn't Spoken, But To Her Great Surprise, They All Thought In Chorus (i Hope You Understand What Thinking In Chorus Means--for I Must Confess That I Don't), 'better Say Nothing At All. Language Is Worth A Thousand Pounds A Word!

They've A Temper, Some Of Them - Particularly Verbs, They're The Proudest - Adjectives You Can Do Anything With, But Not Verbs.

Through The Looking Glass

Is All Our Life, Then But A Dream Seen Faintly In The Golden Gleam Athwart Time's Dark Resistless Stream?

I Am Fond Of Children - Except Boys.

You Have To Run As Fast As You Can Just To Stay Where You Are. If You Want To Get Anywhere, You'll Have To Run Much Faster.

"take Some More Tea," The March Hare Said To Alice, Very Earnestly. "i've Had Nothing Yet," Alice Replied In An Offended Tone, "so I Can't Take More."

Where One Is Hopelessly Undecided As To What To Say, There (as Confucius Would Have Said, If They Had Given Him The Opportunity) Silence Is Golden.

It Was For Bringing The Cook Tulip-roots Instead Of Onions.

When I’m A Duchess,” She Said To Herself (not In A Very Hopeful Tone Though), “i Won’t Have Any Pepper In My Kitchen At All. Soup Does Very Well Without. Maybe It’s Always Pepper That Makes People Hot-tempered,” She Went On, Very Much Pleased At Having Found Out A New Kind Of Rule, “and Vinegar That Makes Them Sour—and Camomile That Makes Them Bitter—and—and Barley-sugar And Such Things That Make Children Sweet-tempered. I Only Wish People Knew That; Then They Wouldn’t Be So Stingy About It, You Know—

Tis A Secret: None Knows How It Comes, How It Goes: But The Name Of The Secret Is Love!

I Said It In Hebrew—i Said It In Dutch— I Said It In German And Greek; But I Wholly Forgot (and It Vexes Me Much) That English Is What You Speak!

Do Not, Oh Do Not Indulge Such A Wild Idea That A Newspaper Might Err! If So What Have We To Trust In This Age Of Sham?

I'm Very Much Afraid I Didn't Mean Anything But Nonsense. Still, You Know, Words Mean More Than We Mean To Express When We Use Them; So A Whole Book Ought To Mean A Great Deal More Than The Writer Means. So, Whatever Good Meanings Are In The Book, I'm Glad To Accept As The Meaning Of The Book.

If He Smiled Much More, The Ends Of His Mouth Might Meet Behind, And Then I Don't Know What Would Happen To His Head! I'm Afraid It Would Come Off!

The Hurrier I Go, The Behinder I Get.

"try Another Subtraction Sum. Take A Bone From A Dog: What Remains?" [asked The Red Queen] Alice Considered. "the Bone Wouldn't Remain, Of Course, If I Took It-and The Dog Wouldn't Remain; It Would Come To Bite Me-and I'm Sure I Shouldn't Remain!" "then You Think Nothing Would Remain?" Said The Red Queen. "i Think That's The Answer." "wrong, As Usual," Said The Red Queen, "the Dog's Temper Would Remain."

There Ought To Be A Book Written About Me, That There Ought!

Alice In Wonderland Alice

Alice Adventures In Wonderland

The Caterpillar And Alice Looked At Each Other For Some Time In Silence: At Last The Caterpillar Took The Hookah Out Of Its Mouth.

Must A Name Mean Something?" Alice Asked Doubtfully. Of Course It Must," Humpty Dumpty Said With A Short Laugh; "my Name Means The Shape I Am - And A Good Handsome Shape It Is, Too. With A Name Like Yours, You Might Be Any Shape, Almost.

"she Can't Do Subtraction." Said The White Queen. "can You Do Division? Divide A Loaf By A Knife-what's The Answer To That?" "i Suppose-" Alice Was Beginning, But The Red Queen Answered For Her. "bread-and-butter, Of Course."

She's In That State Of Mind That She Wants To Deny Something Only She Doesn't Know What To Deny!

Well! I've Often Seen A Cat Without A Grin,' Thought Alice 'but A Grin Without A Cat! It's The Most Curious Thing I Ever Saw In My Life!

Off With Their Heads!

How Doth The Little Crocodile Improve His Shining Tail, And Pour The Waters Of The Nile On Every Golden Scale! How Cheerfully He Seems To Grin, How Neatly He Spreads His Claws, And Welcomes Little Fishes In, With Gently Smiling Jaws!

May We Not Then Sometimes Define Insanity As An Inability To Distinguish Which Is The Waking And Which The Sleeping Life? We Often Dream Without The Least Suspicion Of Unreality: 'sleep Hath Its Own World', And It Is Often As Lifelike As The Other.

And As To Being In A Fright, Allow Me To Remark That Ghosts Have Just As Good A Right In Every Way, To Fear The Light, As Men To Fear The Dark.

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